where did you even get those

3

Can we talk more about Lextra’s room here?
Like- homegirl has 4 FUCKING RUGS IN THE CENTER OF HER ROOM AND THOSE ARE JUST THE ONES WE CAN SEE IN THESE SHOTS
WHY DO YOU NEED 4 FUCKING RUGS LEXA
THEY DONT EVEN MATCH
AND WHAT ABOUT THAT FUCKING BEAR RUG HUH? WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPRESS WITH THAT? DID YOU KILL IT YOURSELF OR DO YOU JUST LIKE THE AESTHETIC IT BRINGS TO YOUR WILD ASS ROOM

AND WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE CANDLES ON THAT WEIRD SHELF THING IN THE AIR ABOVE THE BOX IN THE LAST FRAME???? HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LIGHT THOSE FUCKERS?? DO YOU JUST HAVE SOME POOR SOUL OF A SERVANT BOY NAMED WESLEY WHO HAS TO CLIMB A MOUNTAIN OF YOUR RANDOM HOARDER ASS SHIT JUST TO LIGHT 8 FUCKING CANDLES TO MATCH YOUR MISMATCHED RUGS, DEAD BEAR AESTHETIC???¿? WHAT A FUCKING HASSLE

And also what the actual fuck are those floating candle cages????¿? Why the fuck do they hang so low? Just imagine Clarke getting out of bed at like 3 am to go to the bathroom, half asleep and tired af with her eyes barely open. She knows the rooms layout enough to be able to walk through practically blind but she always forget about those stupid ass candle cages until CLANG she walks headfirst into one and smacks the shit out of her forehead. And Lexa wakes up to the smash and Clarke’s half grunt half roar of pain and salty frustration and immediately goes for her bedside dagger ready to fite like ‘who dare attack me and my Clorke?¿’ ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ
And in the darkness of their room she just gets from Clarke 'jeSUS FUCKING FUCK SHIT FUCK WHY’ and Lexa is so confused and startled and disoriented and ready to kick some ass but Clarke is still going off 'WHY THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS EVEN REAL WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEED THIS SHIT LEXA FUCK’ and Lexa’s eyes are adjusting and she can now see that she and Clarke are the only one’s in here so she is just like ?¿ big eyes like the confused puppy she is and like stumbling through the dark towards Clarke with needy grabby hands like 'clorke my sun and my stars I will protect- where you be?’
And Clarke is just holding her forehead continuing to roar obscenities even though it honestly isn’t even that painful she’s mostly just tired and pissed that she has to deal with this shit at 3 am and she’s just 'LEXA GET RID OF THIS SHIT YOU DONT NEED 78 FUCKING CANDLES IN HERE AND 9 OF THEM IN FUCKING FLOATING METAL FUCKING SHIT CAGES’
and yes I did count all those candles and I counted 78 fucking candles fite me (don’t actually I’m small and frail)
And Lexa is just like 'shhhh klark my love come back to sleep’
And Clarke is 'FUCKING WHY LEXA’
And Lexa is all 'shhhh it’s for the aesthetic clork’
Clarke 'bUT WHY-’
Lexa 'shhhhhhhhhhhhh the aesthetic clock the aesthetic’
And a guard comes in like 'HEDA I HEARD SCREAMING ARE YOU ALRIGHT’
And Clarke grabs some random ass candle lying around and chucks it at this poor soul like 'NOT FUCKING NOW WESLEY’

How to Recover From an Accidental Screw Up

1. Although it’s natural to feel stupid or bad, don’t stay in the pit of self hatred and despair. It doesn’t mean you’re evil, or that nobody should like you. It just means you are human, and this time you got it wrong.

2. Try and gain perspective by looking for exceptions – and remembering those times when you felt proud of yourself. The picture’s not all black – we have good as well as bad days – and other people screw up, and get it wrong, as well.

3. Accept responsibility for what you said or did – but that doesn’t mean you have to also feel ashamed. Often, saying we are sorry or admitting we were wrong will earn respect from others – so they’re happy to move on.

4. Related to this, communicate as fully as you can with those affected, and try to do your part to put things right where they’ve gone wrong. Being part of the solution will change how others see you. So don’t just withdraw, be as helpful as you can

5. Also, no matter how bad the consequences of your actions, the chances are that things will get better over time. Even if things fall apart, and are awful for a while, you can still start again – it doesn’t mean this is the end.

6. Hold your head high again and don’t keep thinking of what happened. You have goals to work towards, and a great future to create.

Breathe

You know that feeling where you feel like everything is crumbling all at once, not slowly but rapidly like water crashing at the bottom of fountains? That feeling where your entire world becomes black and there seemed to be no sign of any light, not even a glow? That feeling you get as you walk through the hallways, with the crippling fear that those tens of eyes by the lockers are judging every inch of your body, although those heads weren’t even turned?

Anxious. Your heart races at a speed not even NASA’s rockets can achieve, beads of sweat rolling down your cherry red face and your hands, clammy and white from that tight clutching you did.

Breathe, you will be okay. These feelings of helplessness that you get lasts for minutes in the real world but to you it’d could feel like an eternity. Breathe, they don’t stay forever.

You say that they will come back like dark clouds after the evaporation process, but you always forget that you are not alone. All you see inside your head is darkness, the loud silence piercing through your ears. Breathe, you are not alone.

Through every pain, every breathless moment, every time you feel like crumbling into a hole, you are never alone. These days will past, give it some time. Give yourself some time, breathe. All you see is darkness inside you, but behind that wall you’ve built is the brightest glow that you’ll ever see. Hope.

Break those walls, you are stronger than you think. They look like tough, unbreakable concrete walls. Little do you know that your faith and inner strength have the power of wrecking balls, maybe even stronger. What do you know? Try it and surprise yourself.

Get over that great pyramid, cross the open oceans, search for the end of that horizon, find yourself. Someday you’ll walk through those hallways confident and barely anxious. Someday you’ll learn that your self-confidence does not rely on other people’s opinions. Someday you will learn to love yourself.

It’s okay to feel sad sometimes, emotions are a part of life. It’s okay to want to be strong sometimes, you’ll find your strength. But it’s not okay to give up. For you have staggered through the thousands of sand dunes out there, scaled the tallest pyramid and fought the coldest winter. You shall feel happy someday because you deserve it. Your emotions deserve some enlightenment, don’t hold yourself back.

Go on an adventure like never before, embark on a journey of self-discovery. Find out who you truly are. Don’t give up, never give in for second, aim to be better than you were last time. You’re come so far to give up on this journey, life has never been this great for you. If you need a sign, this is it. Keep fighting, keep pushing on. The pain is temporary, there are solutions to reduce and prevent it.

sleep on the floor

a/n: for @sobforsirius, @mermaeid, and all the other starbucks fans out there


James Potter to Sirius Black: did u get the calc notes
Sirius Black: do i ever get the calc notes
James Potter: good point


James Potter to peter schnapps is pronounced like schnawps not schnaps: evans and i were playing footsies under the table
Sirius Black: that wasnt evans


Peter Pettigrew to theyr playing cat stevens in the supermarket there is no god: if you had to marry anyone in the group who would it be
Sirius Black: james
Remus Lupin: james
James Potter: sirius


Sirius Black to James Potter: let s get married
James Potter: ok
Sirius Black: im not joking
James Potter: neither am i


Sirius Black to TRUTH OR DAREEEEEE BITCHES: remus i cant believe alice griffiths was your first kiss
Remus Lupin: who was yours
Sirius Black: james
Remus Lupin: what
James Potter: mine was melanie perkins in kindergarten
Sirius Black: wHAT


Sirius Black to James Potter: i am shocked and offended
Sirius Black: i thought we had something special
James Potter: i was five
Sirius Black: stop denying it
James Potter: i’m not
Sirius Black: were over
Sirius Black: im never speaking to you again
James Potter: don’t be like that babe
Sirius Black: HOW COULD YOU


James Potter to Sirius Black: u know it was good for me to right
Sirius Black: doesnt make it any better
James Potter: how about if i throw in a curly wurly
Sirius Black: two curly wurlys
James Potter: deal


Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: stop making heart eyes at james
Sirius Black: cant help it
Sirius Black: its a perpetual state of being
Sirius Black: like how ur a in a perpetual state of being a twat
Remus Lupin has removed Sirius Black from the chat.


Sirius Black to James Potter: jaems
Sirius Black: james
Sirius Black: im d runk
Sirius Black: come over
Sirius Black: i need yoy
James Potter: crikey
Sirius Black: on second thoughts im completely sober and i dont need you anymore
James Potter: was it because i said crikey
Sirius Black: not it was because of some completely unrelated stupid thing u said
James Potter: fine
Sirius Black: fine
James Potter:
James Potter: im still coming over
Sirius Black: i know


Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: whats that on your shirt
Sirius Black: toothpaste
Remus Lupin: are you sure
Sirius Black: i hate you


Remus Lupin to James Potter: mary macdonald just asked me if you and sirius were fucking
James Potter: what did u tell her
Remus Lupin: i told her you and sirius were fucking
James Potter: excellent


James Potter to Sirius Black: why werent u in detention this afternoon
Sirius Black: didnt have detention
James Potter: wHAT???1??11???? SIRIS??!?!? BLACK/!!!/2/2/2/??? DIDNT!??!?!? HAVE////???? DETENTION??!?!???1!@!!! what is the world coming to
Sirius Black: i hate you


Sirius Black to James Potter: can i say at urs over break
James Potter: obviously
James Potter: is that even a question
James Potter: also mum wants to know if you want her to set up a bed in my room for you
Sirius Black: is THAT even a question
James Potter: tru


James Potter to fuckwits galore: sirs mum just rocked up at school
Remus Lupin: where are you
James Potter: front gates
James Potter: jesus christ his dads here too
Remus Lupin: on our way


Remus Lupin to black eyes look hardcore but they hurt like hell: james do you really think the best way of distracting his parents was by having pete moon them from the top of the school
James Potter: in hindsight?? yes


Sirius Black to materoonies: so if i were a respectable and trustworthy citizen
Remus Lupin: which ur not
Sirius Black: and i had a group of highly respectable and trustworthy mates
Peter Pettigrew: which u don’t
Sirius Black: how would i go about hiding a body
James Potter: …..what did u do
Sirius Black: nOTHING


Sirius Black to whats the answers to number 3: remus why do u like cat stevens
Remus Lupin: why do u like james
Sirius Black: good point
James Potter: i am shocked and offended
Remus Lupin: is it because of how shockingly bad your haircut is
James Potter: I TOLD THEM TO CUT IT SHORT I DIDNT MEAN /THAT/ SHORT


Sirius Black to LADSLADSLADS: smooth peanut butter is better than crunchy
Remus Lupin: no it isnt
Sirius Black: james tell him
James Potter: smooth peanut butter is better than crunchy
Remus Lupin: i hate u


Sirius Black to SMOOTH IS BETTER REMUS AND U KNO IT: i love you bro
James Potter: i love you too bro
Sirius Black: i love you more bro
James Potter: thats not possible bro
Remus Lupin: can u guys stop doing this in the groupchat its 3am


Remus Lupin to settle down children: where are you
Sirius Black: in the car
Sirius Black: im playing a game called put the gearshift in neutral when james isnt looking
Remus Lupin: is gearstick a euphemism for something else
Sirius Black has removed Remus Lupin from the chat.


Remus Lupin to how would you even put a dick into neutral: how did you get those hickeys
Sirius Black: i fell over
James Potter: i was with him when it happened
Sirius Black: utterly tragic
James Potter: im suprised he made out it mostly unscathed
Peter Pettigrew: get a room


Remus Lupin to were in the enemies to lvoers trope except were all still enemies i hate all of u: did you guys see what kim k posted on twitter
James Potter: fuck me sideways
Sirius Black: say please
Peter Pettigrew: stop it


James Potter to Sirius Black: please
Sirius Black: ;))))))))))

Voltron AU where everything’s the same except...

Instead of the regular show we get Keith’s internal monologue voice-over narration style like J.D. in the show Scrubs.  

Rescuing Shiro/meeting Lance and co.

“How did I forget a whole person??? Who does that? Me. Apparently. Okay, just…act casual, that’ll work.

“Update. Acting casual did not work.”

Meeting the Alteans 

“Robot cats. Space elves. You know, ‘my friend was abducted by aliens’ is not really a theory you expect to pan out.”

Encountering the Arusians 

“They’re so small and harmless and adorable…WAIT…is this how Allura and Coran think about us???”

I say Vol- you say -tron scene

“I’m pretty sure this is one of those social situation things Shiro talks about where you laugh even if you don’t get the joke…but seriously, what is happening right now?”  

At some unspecified point in the future

*Lance is talking*

“You’re adorable”

“What?”  

“I said you’re annoying”  *Keith exits*

“…Nailed it.”  

And like in Scrubs the internal monologue POV randomly switches to other characters every few episodes or so.

Business and Pleasure - Part 10

Summary:  Bucky AU. After a major deal falls through, your father’s business almost falls apart. In a desperate attempt to save his livelihood, he seeks the help of his oldest friend, George Barnes, who happens to be the CEO of one of the most influential businesses in New York. He agrees, but on one condition. You have to marry his son.

Word Count: 2,201

Warnings: Swearing


Originally posted by little--batman


The two of you had fallen into silence, both seemingly lost in thought. The appetizers were delicious, but you couldn’t do more than pick at them. You were too distracted by your thoughts to focus on eating.

So much had happened in so little time. Sure, it seemed like you had your best friend back, but who knew how long that would last. He seemed sincere earlier, but there was no way to guarantee that the two of you wouldn’t get into another stupid argument and find yourselves right back where you started.

Keep reading

4

josuke didnt really think this through

Transgender bathroom segregation? We have been there before.

You know all those anti-transgender bathroom bills, where their supporters will force trans people to use the bathroom of their assigned gender, while expressing concern for women and children? We have been there before. 

What history tells us is that people who hate use segregation in public places to harass, humiliate and control those they consider inferior. 

This is not about protecting women and children. This is about protecting an oppressive way of life.

Here are some pictures from the segregated American South and Apartheid South Africa. Do you see the difference between what the haters did then and what they do now?

Exactly! Trans women and trans men do not even get their own segregated restrooms. They are to stay at home, in their closets.

Anyone who supports the anti-trans bathroom bills are committing a crime against humanity, in the same way the racist of the southern states and South Africa did when these posters were put up.

winged sentence starters
  1. “Can you stop shedding feathers in the shower? Or at least clean them up afterwards?”
  2. “Sorry about my cat. she/he really, really likes feathery things.”
  3. “Hold on, your feathers are looking a bit disheveled. Want me to straighten them out for you?”
  4. “Can you actually… use those things?”
  5. “Oh my god. You have wings.”
  6. “How is this even possible?”
  7. “Hey, what’s up with your back? You look like a professional olympic swimmer on steroids.”
  8. “You flew for six hours? Come here, you’re getting a back rub.” 
  9. “Did someone try and pluck a feather again? Are they dead?”
  10. “What on earth happened to you? Have your wings been trimmed? Wh- are you ok?!”
  11. “…Where are your wings? What happened to you?”
  12. “So, like… do you just cut holes in your clothes and stuff?”
  13. “Underwear must be confusing.”
  14. “Look. I know you want to cuddle, but ten seconds after you fall asleep you roll away and I get a mouthful of feathers. Clean your primaries or stay still!”

I really appreciate Stardew Valley because Shane’s depression is really realistic. Like he microwaves all of his food because he can’t be bothered to actually cook and he talks about watching a lot of TV to distract himself from life and he drinks to numb himself. He even makes those little quips about death and outright says “I don’t want to be around long enough to have a ‘plan’”. Like okay, those are all fair enough. But what really gets me is that, after you build your friendship up with him, even after his suicide attempt and he agrees to go to therapy, he’s not just suddenly happy. He’s not some romance novel love-made-my-depression-end happy. You get propose to him and he’s still like “??? I suck though.” and even when you’re married and he lives with you and loves his life more than he previously did, there are still days he lays in bed all day and feels like garbage. I love that he’s still working through it realistically, and they didn’t just make it some bullshit where he was happy forever now. AND ON TOP OF THAT he doesn’t get better for YOU. He gets better for HIMSELF. And his aunt and his goddaughter!!!! AND HIS FUCKING CHICKENS HE LOVES THOSE CHICKENS SO MUCH. 

Sry I have a lot of feelings about Shane.

Some quick musings on the new update

thelostspecial.com

Here is the text, with my first thought comments in bold:

I was going to draw this out longer but the truth is, I’m bored.

OK

There is no Lost Special. There never was, and there never will be.

And you know this objectively?

Once again, in their need to keep this midnight train going, TJLC fans created something out of nothing.

Even if that is that case, why do you care?

Seeing this obsession with “The Lost Special,” even though series 4 was clearly over, I couldn’t resist the opportunity to run a sociological experiment with a vicious fandom in denial.

Steven brought it up, not us.  Also, even if the series is over, that doesn’t mean it’s over.  They’ve repeatedly said they have through series 5 mapped out. It was only in December 2016 they started hinting at “we don’t know, this could be it.” Sure Jan.

My poorly assembled website took not more than twenty minutes to cobble together (as some people rightly pointed out) and very little effort to maintain.

This is a lie.  

“By the pricking of my thumbs (something wicked this way comes)”- I edited an ominous message into the code and title, referencing the Macbeth quote used in The Six Thatchers. It was strange to see how many people didn’t recognise the “pricking” quote and even criticised the website because it allegedly didn’t call back to Sherlock in any way- except that I was directly quoting a series 4 episode.

Except most of us did recognize this?  What about your dancing man code reference to Unto the Breach?

Watching fans defend how shoddy the website is, in their need for thelostspecial to be real was especially funny. It was also funny to see the people who guessed the website was fake and said as much, but didn’t even care because they desperately needed something to hold onto, with Sherlock over.

Whichever, why do you care?  Why would it be funny to you?

Then there’s the people who clocked that thelostspecial.com wasn’t “real”… and yet never question their own dedication to TJLC and/or the existence of a fourth episode of series 4, concepts entirely created by Tumblr.

The lost special site was only one of hundreds of indications something is fucky.  

 Anyhow. Next, I threw a random bunch of numbers and photos out there to see how people would scramble and react, and you didn’t let me down. Mostly I chose the first photo I found of a character that I liked the look of, in Google; there wasn’t real logic. I re-used some images out of laziness. I used an online generator to make the Dancing Men/Henry V code post.

So the meanings we found in everything, tying it somehow back to Sherlock, or ACD canon, or anything else were all coincidences?  

What do we say about coincidences?

40, 27, kra, the various “hints” you think you found on the website and found countless possible meanings of, they were chosen at random. Even the elephant photo was chosen at random. It wasn’t until after I edited it into the main website photo that I discovered the poor thing was named Mary and had been shot and executed for killing a man (on 9.13.16. Everyone overthought that one too much.)  So I used that info because it was serendipitous. “The universe is rarely so lazy?” Friends, the universe is often lazy.

“They were chosen at random.”  “The universe is rarely so lazy?

Sure Jan.

When I added a black image with five pixels of colour to the website, you did not let me down. People played with the image until they became convinced it was QR code spelling something out. It was just five meaningless pixels of nothing, created in MS Paint.

Yet you did the whole thing in 20 minutes.

The static gif was taken from a YouTube video of TV static from some movie, with an old Moriarty close-up thrown in.

We know, 28 days later.  With Moriarty loaded in.  Again, whole thing in 20 minutes.

The photo of John and Sherlock sitting in the watery 221B, I got it from Farfarawaysite.com, and scaled it down a little because the photo was large. That’s it. I didn’t change the proportions in any way, or alter the colours, or add anything to the photo. Anything you saw in it, you imagined. I left the big black header on the website as a hint to keep your eye on those, since the thing I changed on 2/11 was in the similar Twitter header.

”That’s it. I didn’t change the proportions in any way, or alter the colours, or add anything to the photo. Anything you saw in it, you imagined.”

Like Murderous Mary being photoshopped into the back picture? Sure Jan: http://whimsicalethnographies.tumblr.com/post/156824256785/221bloodnun-whimsicalethnographies

I changed the plain black header of the Twitter to a black one with a word embedded in it. The profile photo was changed to a plain black photo with XX hidden in it. No one bothered checking it, though clearly the account was active again, so I changed the profile photo to show the Xs, as a hint to look deeper. Finally people found the “clue” today, not that it matters. The word spelled out there is another blind alley that leads nowhere.

Then accept all our follow requests.  

MMTE: The source code message was a hint toward Murderous Mary the Elephant, which some of you guessed but no one looked for it.

murderousmarytheelephant.tumblr.com

(Don’t bother trying to access it, there’s nothing in there.)

DON’T LOOK NOTHING TO SEE HERE, EVEN THOUGH THERE’S A PASSWORD.

There was no set schedule for changes to thelostspecial. I used intermittent reinforcement to keep people frustrated but coming back for more. That’s why I added and removed things at unexpected times. There is no pattern.

Ok?

For people wondering, wow, why would anyone take so much time to do this? Well, I didn’t. Creating the plain black squares with a few letters, throwing a message into the source coding,  and uploading the new website photo of John and Sherlock took maybe 5 minutes. Creating a side blog with no posts and keeping it private takes one minute.

Except the photoshopping you DID do as established would have taken more.  Even searching for the first image you found would have taken time.

Overall, it takes less than twenty minutes a week to do this, once it was set up, because really? You do all the work for me. You all did what TJLCers do best- you took a bunch of random data, inflated it into something much more complicated than it really was, and created your own narrative out of it. Even knowing it might be nothing, and was probably just a fan-made site, you’ve still allowed yourselves to get worked up over it and allowed yourselves to hope. You’re reading into nonsense and finding clues where there are none, and naturally most of those “clues” pointed exactly where you wanted them to point to. Confirmation bias at its finest.

Well all I get from this is that we’re smarter than you are.

Learn from this.

Stop falling into conspiracies. Trust yourself when you can see that something isn’t real or likely. Alternately, find something that doesn’t make you feel sad or heartbroken.

Seriously?  “Trust yourself when you can see that something isn’t real or likely.”

Instincts are to be trusted, John.  

Also, my instincts have gotten me into a pretty good place. I’ll keep trusting them, thanks, and they tell me something is fucky.  We’ve seen this episode before.  

Goddamn you’re arrogant.

A few final notes:

“And in conclusion *jerk off motion*

I was somewhat entertained by the several dozen times people attempted to reset the password for the website and access the control panel. If I was petty, I would’ve logged your IPs and reported you to your ISP. (Don’t worry, I didn’t. I don’t care that much.)’

You cared enough to look.  

I didn’t send the “mole” anons or any other messages on Tumblr. I think other fans decided to join the game. I imagine they’ll continue until they get bored, too.

Read: I can’t say why everything else is fucky too.  Must be more people like me.

The only twitter account connected to thelostspecial.com is twitter.com/thelostspecial. I have no idea who runs the “contact” twitters but I’m positive they’re fan accounts. (If you think BBC-sanctioned accounts would post like that, I have a bridge to sell you.) As for my twitter, I set up the thelostspecial twitter account, followed some BBC-related accounts and left it alone for a week while TJLC fans went wild trying to suss out who I was following. That’s all I did with it.

Then accept my follow request.  Seriously, YOU’RE SO CLEVER I need to follow you to learn your secrets.

I didn’t start thelostspecial Instagram account. Someone else did that, I don’t know who.

Nobody asked.  Actually, I didn’t even know there was an instragram account.  Did anyone else know?

And if you enjoyed hunting, try a legitimate online riddle game, such as Amnesya.com for a challenge! All the fun, none of the TJLC and fandom “fucky” business.

Well, since you brought up “fucky business,” why are they screenshots of the Shrewd Living posts in the “Museum?” Did you do that too? Wow.  In charge of a scam website.  Oh, you don’t know about that?  Then why put it in there?  Why, John?

Nah.

Sherlock Series 4 is over. This is the end.

Thanks for playing TheLostSpecial! Goodbye and God bless.

Seriously, we’ve seen this episode before.

WE’VE SEEN THIS EPISODE BEFORE.

Rivals (Peter Maximoff x Reader)

Request: Can you write a one-shot with peter maximoff where they’re basically rivals and don’t really like each other and it ends up with them getting into a really awkward position(like locked in a cupboard or something) and they make up or something (Also can the reader have Cheshire cat like powers?)

Powers: Invisibly/Teleporting (No flying that’s just to much and no shape shifting)

Rating: T/Fluff

For: Anon

A/n: I don’t know if my username inspired you or what but this’ll be fun to write. 

Later A/n: THIS TOOK ME SO LONG TO WRITE BUT IM HAPPY I STAYED UP UNTIL LIKE 3:00 TO WRITE THIS SO PLEASE LIKE IT I’M GOING TO REGRET THIS TOMORROW

L/n= Last Name/Surname | N/N = Nickname

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

So the bird Inquisitor thing is my jam rn, could you do DA:I companions react to an avian Inquisitor who's in the process of molting? Non gif - Romances if possible c: Thank you!

Cassandra: She thinks it’s sort of funny at first, but then less so when their feathers are EVERYWHERE. She asks them if they can somehow manually get them all off to halt their process of leaving feathers all over. She grumbles at the mess, but does feel a little bad for them when she sees them itching. If Romanced: She tries to help get the molting feathers off, or at least itch a little in places he can’t reach. “Maker’s Breath,” she says, “how many feathers do you even have?” “Not enough for you to have to spend forever with me. A pity.” he teases, and she groans but laughs.

Iron Bull: “Man, where were you when we did that job trying to scare the shit out of that noble? We could have used all these feathers.” He just suggests flapping them vigorously to see if that helps get them all off. If Romanced: He suggests some exercise to “REALLY ruffle those loose feathers right off. Repeatedly, if you want.” His bedroom is absolutely COVERED in feathers later, but he doesn’t complain.

Blackwall: He just takes it in stride, laughing as they sneeze and kick up a whirlwind of feathers. “Here,” he offers, handing them a wooden back-scratcher, “made this for you. Maybe it’ll help, eh?” He may take a feather to use as a reference when carving his rocking griffons. If Romanced: She’s embarrassed by the mess when he comes up to her room, but he gets a kick out of it. “It’s not so bad,” he laughs, “at least I can find you for a kiss. It’s a little trail of Inquisitor-ness.”

Sera: She collects some of them for pranks, and has to compete with Leliana’s agents and Josephine’s cleaners for them. It’s all worth it, though, she cackles as she prepares to dump feathers on nobles after getting glue on them and tickling feet and noses. “You ought to drop your feathers more often, and tell me first.” she laughs. If Romanced: She calls first dibs right away, but fewer of them are used for pranks. Instead, she saves them and hides them for herself, though she tucks feathers into places she can see readily to remind her of her girlfriend. She also gets the spots her girlfriend can’t reach.

Varric: “Hold on, get those feathers in a bag– I’m going to feather-bomb the Merchant’s Guild the next time they start asking me to respond to their letters.” Alas, he has to compete with several others going for the feathers, so he gives up on the idea and salvages a few to keep as backup quills. “Tell me ahead of time you molt, next time. I swear it’ll be a great prank.”

Cole: His main concern is trying to alleviate the Herald’s itching and irritation, because no one is hurting because of the molting but them– in fact, most of Skyhold finds it mildly amusing, if anything. “Don’t itch. The hurt will be worse.” he warns. “Vivienne can make medicine that helps. Raw, tickling, itching irritation, wind carrying scales of color away, it must be hard…”

Vivienne: She wrinkles her nose at the mess and arranges for a tailor to make them “wingsocks” to contain the feathers– “Before all of Skyhold is covered in feathers.” she says dryly. She also scolds them if they itch at raw spots too much– “it will make the itching worse.” Instead, she offers a cream that’s supposed to help soothe itching.

Dorian: “Ah. Molting season, I see.” he says dryly as some spots on their wings are bare and feathers follow them wherever they go. “Just do be careful up in the library, else I’ll find my nook covered in feathers. Josephine is already fussing over the mess your feathers are making.” He might pick up one or two to use as bookmarks. If Romanced: He takes some time to try to get loose feathers free and clean them up. “Amatus, you’re positively a mess.” he teases. “Fortunately for you, I find it sort of charming.”

Solas: There’s not much they can do about it, so he doesn’t find reason to comment much. His nose does wrinkle in distaste, though, as feathers always land on the floor, on the desk, on the bed in his room in the rotunda whenever they go through it. If Romanced: He finds it sort of amusing, really. He gets at spots she can’t get and steals a feather for himself.

Josephine: She has to ask some poor workers to clean up the feathers– they pile up quickly and make quite a mess. She cringes as nobles and visitors pick up feathers to keep, and even as a few Orlesians offer to scratch at particular itchy spots to relieve them, in exchange for the feathers. The DeLauncets even offer to pay for all of the feathers for some sort of… pillow or bed composed of the feathers. Josephine doesn’t want to ask or know. If Romanced: She’s sympathetic to their struggling, and in her time off, massages any irritated or itchy parts of their wings, in spite of the feathers rapidly dropping off. 

Cullen: “Maker’s breath, what a mess.” he grouses as he tip-toes over a pile of feathers or two. He has the decency to not make a single comment, however. If Romanced: He follows the feather trail right to her to give her a kiss. She giggles and asks if he minds the mess. “Not at all,” he laughs, “the feathers are almost as beautiful as you.”

Leliana: She advises collecting the feathers for use later. She uses them to throw off Venatori in the field, who follow the feathers thinking it leads to the Inquisitor. It works effectively. “Do let me know ahead of time next time you start molting.” she says cheerfully.

Alex Standall x Reader One Shot

Can you write a fic where the reader calls Alex in the middle of the night saying she wants fast food and then Alex goes and picks them up (even tho its 1 am) and takes them to go get food and maybe a even a little dance/singing party in the car on the way to the fast food place (Ooh and could they maybe even stop somewhere and sit on top of his car staring at the stars and talking and thats when Alex realizes he loves her) if its not to much? (sorry im such a hoe for all this)

Keep reading

° * ———— RIVERDALE SENTENCE STARTERS.

’ What? Sardonic humor is just my way of relating to the world. ’
’ Can I borrow the truck for the drive-in? ’
’ Ah okay. Isn’t there a nice gay kid at your school? ’
’ We both know what goes in those woods. ’
’ Alright. No cruising guys tonight. ’
’ I learned that from the Nancy Drew detective handbook. ’
’ What would your Holy Roller mother say about this, _____? ’
’ And where did you get those thigh-high boots? They’re amazing. ’
’ My type? Definitely. ’
’ But you’ve got more demons than The Exorcist. ’
’ Is it true what they say about your dad? ’
’ Does everyone here know? ’
’ That he’s the devil incarnate? I stand by my father. ’
’ I’m asking you now, right now, if you love me, or even like me? ’
’ I can’t give you the answer you want. ’
’ I’ve never been good enough for you. ’
’ I’ll never be good enough for you. ’
’ You are so perfect. I’ve never been good enough for you. ’
’ That’s where I was living before. ’
’ Why the hell aren’t you living at home? ’
’ Truth is things aren’t great at home. ’
’ He/she keeps promising that he/she will get his/her act together. ’
’ Screw that! Live with me. ’
’ It’s temporary. I’m going to figure something out. ’
’ Just don’t tell anybody, especially not _____. ’
’ She’s/he’s not going to care. ’
’ Well, exactly. Don’t tell her/him either. ’
’ Why did you leave the home? ’
’ You could’ve really hurt yourself. ’
’ I couldn’t just stay there, waiting for someone who was never going to show. ’
’ I don’t have any money. I don’t have anything. ’
’ Why don’t you just stay here? ’
’ They made that very clear, and that’s not what I want. ’
’ There’s no more stigma. ’
’ You don’t know what they’ll do. ’
’ I won’t have my baby raised in a home that doesn’t want it. ’
’ I cannot lose you again. ’
’ I’m not kidding, the clothes off our backs. ’
’ Like it meant nothing. Like it was nothing. Like I was nothing. ’
’ And you want my help to give it to your boy/girlfriend? ’
’ I was going to apologize to you. ’
’ Honey, I can’t agree to that. ’
’ I don’t want any part of it. ’
’ You weren’t at the drive-in. ’
’ Where were you? ’
’ You think that he/she has the stomach for that?! ’
’ You’re sounding crazy just like your sister/brother. ’
’ I didn’t get the memo we were adding another voice to the mix. ’
’ So that makes me…what then…backup? ’
’ I mean, you were just doing this as a favor to me, right? ’
’ You literally have zero loyalty. ’
’ Everyone else is…disposable. ’
’ You know…maybe it’s not such a bad thing to try a new voice? ’
’ You know how your father feels about pop music. ’
’ I understand, and I won’t. ’
’ Because if you do, he/she will somehow blame me. ’
’ I feel like I don’t even know who my mom and dad are anymore. ’
’ Is this your playing hand? ’
’ And yet, stop punishing yourself while you’re at it. ’
’ I got slammed because I didn’t know the play. ’
’ You know, I endorse this. ’
’ I’ve had my seven minutes of heaven with ________. ’
’ God knows what you’d say. Something to humiliate us? ’
’ Every town has one, the spooky house that all the kids avoid. ’
’ Linked in death even as they were in life. ’
’ It’s off-brand and it sends a false message of acceptance. ’
’ You got a date? ’
’ There is no record of her/him before that. ’
’ Facebook, her/him Linked In account…they were all created a year ago. ’
’ Where did you find all this? ’
’ The deep web, the dark internet. ’
’ Check it, it’s all online…simple Googling. ’
’ What’s happening out there? ’
’ What’s happening out there? Do we know? Is it about me? ’
’ Do we know? Is it about me? ’
’ You do you, girl/boy. I’ll be back. ’
’ What was it like before she/he got here? ’
’ What was it like before she/he got here? I honestly cannot remember. ’
’ No longer lactose intolerant, I see. ’
’ Oh, you don’t even know, do you? ’
’ The things they’re saying about your daughter/son at school? ’
’ Slut-shaming. It’s what they call it when sluts get shamed. ’
’ You should be writing about the real story. ’
’ And who shot that gun on July 4? ’
’ What the hell is a “Sticky Maple”? ’
’ No, _______, it’s a slut-shaming thing. ’
’ I’m neither a slut nor am I going to be shamed by someone. ’
’ Does he/she really think he/she can get away with this? ’
’ Does he/she not know who I am?! ’
’ I will cut the brakes on his supped-up phallic symbol. ’
’ I need you to tell me the truth about something. ’
’ Will he/she be able to make a living at it? ’
’ You’re here for me, aren’t you? ’
’ You’re here for me, aren’t you? Because of the autopsy? ’
’ We don’t need to do this in front of your classmates. ’
’ No, that won’t be necessary. ’
’ Back to no texting. What about you? ’
’ I’m back to being the shallow, toxic rich bitch who ruins everything in her path. ’
’ Is this…how you feel about…is it real? ’
’ It is. It is real. Maybe it’s not right, but it’s real. ’
’ I’m “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” but this place is strictly “In Cold Blood.” ’
’ I’m filled with dread. ’
’ Game changer - ________ got hot! ’
’ Six more reasons for you to take that ginger bull by the horns tonight. ’
’ He’s got abs now. Six more reasons for you to take that ginger bull by the horns tonight. ’
’ Is cheerleading still a thing? ’
’ Is being the gay best friend still a thing?! ’
’ What is a “Chock'lit Shoppe” and why does it sell burgers?! ’
’ We are all on the spectrum but my gay-o-meter says you should stick with what you know best…girls/boys. ’
3

Monster (Carl x Reader)

“Imagine being Negan’s daughter. Simon lets you go scavenging around in the area outside the Sanctuary, but you end up lost. Everything will change when you run into the son of your fathers enemy.”

A/N: Just something random I did up to take a break in between requests.

Warnings: Swearing and Spoilers from season 7.


You weren’t sure what exactly you were planning. The sun had already started to set and you knew that your dad wasn’t going to be happy when he found out that you had left the Sanctuary. Simon had told you ‘just a few hours’ and that was the original plan but you got lost pretty quick. You hoped that your dad wouldn’t be too hard on Simon, he had trouble saying no to you and you enjoyed his company when your dad was out terrorizing the other settlements or with one of his many ’wives’. You continued to move through the thick brush as you tried to find something that looked familiar.

You heard the branch snap from behind you and you reacted quicker then you thought you could. You had tackled the assailant behind you, about to drive your knife into his skull before you noticed the color of his skin. The boy took your shock to his advantage and threw you off of him. You moved to get back to your feet but you heard the safety click off of his gun.

“Don’t move, put your hands up…”

Keep reading

“Stop lookin’ over my shoulder while I work! It weirds me out.”

Ted the Animator: “Sorry, I was getting coffee, and… seriously, what’s going on in those frames?”

Carl the Animator: “Ugh, I knew you were gonna go off on that.”

Ted the Animator: “It’s… I mean, how did you even draw that?”

Carl the Animator: “That’s such a nitpick! It goes a little off the label, so what?”

Ted the Animator: “Oh, I m–”

Carl the Animator: “Relax for once, can’t you? No one’s gonna care if I didn’t mask over the tip of the beard.”

Ted the Animator: “Carl, th–”

Carl the Animator: “No. I stand by it. This is where I draw the line, Ted… you have to learn to let go. Not everything can be perfect all the time. The label is perfectly fine the way it is, and I will not re-do it..”

Ted the Animator: “Dude! Carl! I didn’t even notice Satan’s beard going off the label! Chill!”

Carl the Animator: “I c–… wait, what were you looking at, then?”

Ted the Animator: “The freakin’ turning animation 20 seconds later!”

Carl the Animator: “Oh.”

Ted the Animator: “Well?”

Carl the Animator: “…whoops.”

Ted the Animator: “Forget the hot sauce beard, I wanna know what’s going on with that animation’s expressions.”

Carl the Animator: “Yeah, uh… as much as I stand by my work on the hot sauce beard… I’m not gonna try to defend this one.”

anonymous asked:

"You need to take that off right now"

“You need to take that off right now.”

“I’ll take this off when I’m dead,” Adrien declared, standing proudly in front of the mirror and staring at his new ‘I’m Gay for Ladybug’ t-shirt. 

Marinette rubbed at her temples. “First of all, where did you even get that, and second of all, that is a women’s shirt with a message that doesn’t even apply to you.”

Adrien snorted, “Um, first of all, I resent the gendering of clothing and this does apply to me because I’m literally in love with you. And it came free with purchase when I ordered those Ladybug and Chat Noir themed His & Her towels – and before you say anything yes we’re using them.”


[leave the first sentence of a fic in my askbox and i’ll write the next five]