when-will-you-relinquish-your-hold-on-me

Ones must alwasy prove their farms

He is outside us at this moment of first building.
Of your turqoise silence when you hold out your eyelids.
The lovely poppy gave it tiredness.
Inside yellow water and marine snow.
A enduring carpet making a iridescent thing of a lucky meeting with a goddess,
Built and then set in the thicket.
As if to pamper or return or harass.
The cousin smiles at the mother
But the giant does not smile
When he looks at the cat goddess
And the shady ocean.
Steal me and let my substance relinquish.
And you tread like a droplet

Here i am, a lion hearted mouth smeared in the region of snow
So the wonderful pride lives on in a apple,
The delicate house of the current,
The electrical autumn that is warm and dashing.
And you’ll ask why doesn’t his poetry
Create of films and evening stars
And the vertical quilts of his native land?
Opium

I keep beating myself up over it,
Over those words, your apology, halfhearted,
And I just want to fall
Back into you because no one said
Withdrawal would hurt this fucking much.

It’s a constant regret, a questioning of
Things I did and didn’t do when you
Had your arms around me and our
Chests moved as one, and no one
Said it would hurt to hold my breath
For so long, waiting for you
To see me as I am.

And sometimes I go weeks without tearing
My every action to pieces trying to find
The minuscule flaws, but something
Always brings me back to you and the
Hold you have over me, despite your
Trying to relinquish it.

I don’t want to give you up, to lose you to
The cloud of self doubt that’s surrounded
Those few but sweet memories. I don’t
Want to adjourn to the uncomfortable bliss
Of undesirability in your eyes.
Because that would be the thing to slay me.

I told you a million times I couldn’t wait for you forever. I don’t know why you think you still have some sort of hold on my heart. As if I’ve left the door unlocked for you. You need to know that I only existed at one point in your life. Relinquish all hope that I could exist at another. I save thoughts of you for rainy days when I want to remember how much I’ve grown and changed. You mean something to me, but only because you made me realize I deserve better.