when your good to mama

She is flawed and she’s learning to embrace each and every one that makes her uniquely her..

She loves watching sunrises in the milky hours of the morning while the rest of the world sleeps in. Letting the silence soak into her bones and cleanse her soul..

She’s torn blue jeans and converse on lazy Sunday’s and silk and fuck me heels on Friday nights..

She’s not easy to love, she’s a tornado of emotions and moods..

She’s a mix of the old and new, an old soul in a much younger body..

She’s dark and troubled and yet she shines with light and laughter..

She loves deeply, is loyal to a fault, and collects strays, both people and animals alike.

She’s warm summer breezes laying on the beach and fall nights cuddled in a hoodie watching football under Friday night lights..
She curses like a sailor, but when she meets your mama, her good Southern charm and upbringing shines through

She’s a contradiction of naughty and nice, with an Angels face and a sirens body.

She’s dancing barefoot under the moonlight, sweaty silk sheets wrapped around lovers lost in each other, and Sunday mornings spent in bed being lazy.

She’s a an angel with her halo held up by horns
She takes a lot of effort, but with the right man, she’s worth the effort..

I’m getting a  new bong today. My mom is paying for it though, so it is whatever.
— 

white woman, in Boulder, in class at CU

submitted by self-actualized

*Request: you are the daughter of Juice that he didn’t know about but you ranaway from home to find him. Then after some bonding he decides to keep you and just cute fluff because Juice needs some family*

You were riding in a cab, looking down at the only picture you had of your dad. It was a picture of him hugging your mom. You thought about your mom’s beautiful smile and how much you missed it ever since she died. You were living with your aunt but decided to look for your dad because there was things you wanted to know about yourself that only he could give you the answer to. You pulled up to a mechanic shop called “Teller-Morrow” and got out the cab. You walked to the office and saw a woman in nothing but all black, you were confused because it was hot as shit outside. “Excuse me.” You said to her. “Hold on, darling.” The woman said. You waited for about 5 minutes and got impatient. She was just sitting at the desk, looking at papers. All you had for her was a question and she was taking too long. “Look, I’m just looking for someone.Can you point me in the direction of Juan Carlos?” You said and she looked at you. She stood up and walked over to you with a weird look in her eye. “What the hell you want with Juan Carlos darling?” She said already intrigued by the answer you were going to give her. “I’m just someone from his past.” You said, not wanting to share your business with a complete stranger.

“Come on in darling.” She said pointing you to a chair in the small office. She knocked on the window and said, “Where’s Juice?” “He’s in the church!” Someone from the other side of that glass responded. You were confused because you didn’t know who the hell was Juice and you were getting more and more irritated because you came all this way to find your dad and this woman was taking all your damn time. “Look, I can come back later if he’s not here.” You said standing up. “Follow me sweety,” She said smiling. You followed her into a building that you had passed on the way into the parking lot. Once you walked in, you instantly smelled the aroma of beer, pussy, and cigarettes. As you were about to say something to the woman in black two doors opened up and a group of guys in black leather vest came out and you saw him. He looked even better then the picture. “Juan Carlos, this young lady is looking for you.” Everyone laughed which made you feel uncomfortable. “Do I know you?” He asked. “Hi, I’m Y/N.” He shook your hand still wondering who you were. You looked around then got the picture of him and your mom out of your bag. You handed him the picture and he looked up at you. 

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“How’d you get this picture?” He said. “That’;s my mom..” “Lucia.” He said cutting you off. “Yeah, and the guy is my dad.” He looked at you like his world had stopped. Everybody else in the room jaws had dropped. “Hold on, how do you know that this whore isn’t just saying that to you so she can protect you from your real meth head of a dad?” The woman in black said. “Gem, calm down.” Juan said looking up finally. “My mom wasn’t a whore and she damn sure wouldn’t lie to me. You look like more of a meth head pinche babosa.” I said back to the bitch he called Gem. “Woah Woah, let’s take it down a few notches here.” An older man with a cigar in his mouth said. “Where is Lucia now? Did she come with you?” Juan said. “No, I came alone.” “How did you even find me anyways?” Does she know your here?” He said shaking his head. “My aunt Leticia told me where I could find you. My mom is dead, she died about two years ago.” You said in a low tone. The room went silent and you felt like you had enough excitement for today so you just said. “Look I didn’t come here to fuck up your groove or anything, I just wanted to meet you after all these years. You don’t owe me anything.” You said grabbing the picture out of his hand.

“Wait.” Juan said to you. “Do you have a way I can reach you?” He asked. You smiled a little and gave him a piece of paper with your number on it. “I’ll be at the motel in town next to the bar, room 7 if you wanna stop by.” You said to him and walked out.. “Juicy boy, you think she’s telling the truth?” Chibs asked Juice. “She looks just like her mom.” Juice said in a daze. “Was her mom something special to you?” Gemma asked. “She was everything to me. Lucia and I were gonna break the fuck out of our situations and run away together with her sister and her sisters boyfriend. Her mom took them before I got the chance to even say goodbye.” He said. “I honestly never forgot about her. She has her moms attitude.” Juice chuckled. “I noticed.” Gemma said. “You should get some answers from her, because that’s the only person that can give em to you.” Jax said to you. “Yeah, your right.” Juice said. With that he headed to the door and made his way to you.

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He knocked on your motel room door but he got no response. He waited for about 5 minutes and thought you may have been at the bar. “You were having a bar and entertaining a cute guy. “Hey, keep it moving” Juice said to the guy talking to you. “I was starting to think that you weren’t gonna come by.” You said to him. “Aren’t you like 18? You shouldn’t be drinking.” He said to you. You ignored him and said, “I assume that you came to me for some answers.” “How did she die?” He asked and you looked down. “Her old boyfriend beat her senseless and she never came back.” “Why she didn’t leave him? That’s not like Lucia..” He said. “The Lucia you knew died when my whore of a grandma took her and Leticia away from everyone. They both died when they left Queens.” You said. “Yeah, your grandma was always a crazy bitch. We hated her, my mom let your mom and aunt stay with us for at least 4 months one time.” He said laughing a little. “Yeah, I know. Leticia told me.” You said. “You seem very mature.” Juice said looking you. “Yeah, I grew up fast being on my own, I have Leticia but I try not to be a burden.” “Where did the two of you live?” He asked. “We moved around a lot but we’ve been in New Mexico for the longest.” You said to him. “You got a boyfriend?” “Yeah, but he’s in jail and won’t be out until our kid is about 3 years old.” He looked at you and said, “WHAT?!”

You laughed and said, “I’m just joking, I don’t have kids but my boyfriend is in prison.” … The two of you talked on and on about your life and also about his and how he ended up in the biker gang he was in. “Do you ever look for my mother Juan?” He stopped dead in his tracks and said, “Yeah, I found her too well I found your grandma and she said by that time Leticia and Lucia had ran off. I knew they would get away from her one way or another, I’m just glad they did.” “Well, she always talked about you and how I acted like you.” He smiled. “it’s funny because when you smile, I see your mama. Good thing you got her looks.” Juice said. The two of you were outside your motel room and you felt that it was really late. “Well, it’s late and I’m getting a bit tired Juan.” “You can call me Juice, no one calls me Juan Carlos.” You smiled and nodded. “Well, I’ll be seeing you.” and with that you closed the door and went to bed… Juice laid in his bed all night and half of the day thinking on how he was gonna play everything out. He didn’t want you to go because there was too much you and him had missed out on. He had blamed himself for your mama dying because he felt that he should’ve got her before your grandma had the chance to take her away but it was too late.

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The next day was your last day. You were up in your room talking to your boyfriend. “Well, he seems pretty cool Marco. I just hate that I gotta leave today.” You told him. “Well baby doll, it’s not like you have anything here, I’m gonna be in here for a while so you might as well stay longer. You got enough cash from what I left you and more to get an apartment and stay for a few months.” He said to you. Marco was a drug dealer and left you money and money for him once he got out so he wouldn’t be struggling. “I wanna save that money for you baby, I can work for a living back in Albuquerque.” You said. “FUCK THAT baby doll. Leticia and I want you a far away from New Mexico as you can possibly be, you know that. See if your pops can take you in, I’m sure he wants you too.” Marco said. Just the, the operator said, “You have one minute left on this call.” “Well, I’m not sure baby. I love you though and I’m sending you 3 letter and pictures today.” You said quickly. “Yeah, Yeah, next time I call your ass better be in California still. I love you baby doll.” He said right before the phone hung up. You sat there for a second and thought of how much you missed him and what he said bout staying there with Juice but you had to go back. You started to finish packing your things. 

You were waiting for a cab, so you could go to the bus. You heard a knock at the door, and you assumed it was you cab driver. Once you opened the door, you saw Juice. “You came to say goodbye?” You said smiling. “Not exactly, you should stay here.” He said causing you to pause. “What?” You said to him. “we’ve missed too many years Y/N, and I think we should make up for it with the time we have now. I’m not perfect and I don’t expect you to call me dad or feel all this love towards me but I do think we deserve a shot to know each other. You don’t have to stay for years and years but give me a few weeks and we can see where that goes. You can work at the shop and I can get a two bedroom apartment if you decide to stay.” He said in a rush. “It’s funny because my boyfriend just told me that I should stay.” You said shaking your head. “I mean, I don’t see why not. I talked to your aunt and she said you should get away from the shit in New Mexico and start a new life here.” You thought about it for a good 5 minutes and you could tell that Juice was very nervous of the answer you were going to give him. “I could stay here for a bit, but I would have to leave at least twice a month to go see Marco in jail down there.” You said. Juice smiled, “That’s fine with me.” “Then I guess, it’s settled. I’m staying.” You said smiling.