(I’m a boy. Because of my disdain for gym class and long hair in high school, I am often bullied for being gay (which I’m not). I also have an account on a popular fanfiction website and write mostly romance stories, further perpetuating the bullies. One of the most prominent of these bullies sticks around in our school’s game room, where we play a popular fighting game during lunch time. He never plays and stays for the sole purpose of bullying me. I’ve arranged something with the rest of the boys who hang out in the games room for the next day he shows up. When lunch comes around, I find that the bully is already in there and the game isn’t set up.)
Bully: Well, if it isn’t the little f*****. Get your fat a** away from me, I don’t want you turning me gay.
Me: *ignores him and starts setting up the game before grabbing a controller*
Bully: What, does the f** think he’s too great to talk to me? Come on, little man. Say something. *shoves me*
Me: Actions speak louder than words, man. If you want me to say something, then play me in a one on one right now in [game].
Bully: Ha! The f** thinks he can beat me. You’re on, little man.
Me: No problemo. If I win then you have to stop bullying me.
Bully: Bulls***! There’s no wager on this because your f***ing s***ty gay a** won’t beat me.
Me: Then let’s go.
(We play a one on one and I thrash him easily.)
Bully: No f***ing fair, man! The f** is a cheater too!
Me: *under my breath* Geez, what a John.
(The guys who heard me start laughing. A John is someone who is terrible at a video game and blames his losses on his controller malfunctioning, his opponent cheating, etc.)
Me: I won fair and square. How can I prove that I didn’t cheat?
Bully: Play me again. Best two out of three! I wasn’t ready.
(We play a second one on one and I thrash him again.)
Bully: Oh my f***ing God, you f**! Three out of five, you don’t stand a chance! I was going easy on you.
(I thrash him for the third time and he starts whining. Actually whining.)
Bully: Four out of seven, f**!
Guy #1: Dude, shut up already! He’s already proved THREE GODD*** TIMES that he’s better than you! Give it a rest and let the rest of us play!
Bully: Not a chance in h***! I’m not giving up this controller until I beat this d***.
(Guy #2, who is very large and known throughout the school to be gay, walks up behind him and taps his shoulder.)
Bully: What the f*** do you-
Guy #2: I heard you call this kid a f**.
Bully: *nervously* W-what? N-no f-f***ing way, man! I didn’t say anything to this kid.
Guy #2: Well, I know that’s a lie.
Bully: F*** this s*** man, I’m out of here!
(Cue massive high fives from everyone else in there, even the teacher. No one else bullied me from that point on. I learned a few years later that due to not handing in a single assignment throughout the three years he was in grade 9, he was expelled, and then thrown in jail for various drug-related charges.)