when i am mad you talk to me

Part time love is the fucking pits, I am not explicitly talking about romantic love either.

Like, those cats that hit you up when they need something or run out of people to talk to but then dipset as soon as they get what they really want.

This isn’t exclusive to men or women either, both (and all) genders are culpable to this shit. That’s why if people changed their numbers or were like “hit me up” on Twitter to contact them outside of the social sites I didn’t. That’s superficial number building and I am not about that.

And for those “what about my social anxiety- boo-hoo goons”, all it takes is a “hope you’re well” like once a year to stay on the up and up. I have two friends that I talk to maybe four times a year, tops. But since when we do talk we just share love and positivity it’s straight. We have our adult lives but we also want to stay in touch even a little. That’s fair as fuck to me and if you can’t do that then just own it-you don’t want the friends you claim you do, you just want to fill the time gap until the real people you wanna hang with come around.

Do not call trans people by our ‘dead names’. Don’t. Do not do it. Don’t do it as a joke, don’t do it when speaking about the past, don’t do it when speaking in third person, don’t do it when talking to other people about us when we’re not there, don’t do it even if you’ve known us by that name for 50 years, don’t do it even if you’re mad at us or trying to make a point. Don’t even do it to celebrities, not even Republican ones. Do not do it. Do not.
You are telling us, “it doesn’t matter to me that this crushes you, I am ok with holding your pain over your head, your identity isn’t real to me, and I am not your ally.”
And when you do it to one of us you say this to all of us.

dpd #relatabletimes

- depended ?? Love Me??????
- “are you mad at me”
- “im sorry im so clingy”
- constantly wanting to be touching depended
- minemineminemineminemine
- feeling your heart cave in when you dont get a text back
- crying
- “MINEMINEMINEMINEMINEMINE”
- “youre not close enough”
- depended is etheral
- depended is my life force and i am honored to be around them i will worship them for the rest of my mortal life
- DONT LEAVE ME DONT LEAVE ME DONT LEAVE ME DONT LEAVE ME
- “please talk to me”

this is the last poem I’ll ever write for you
and maybe it should be nice and
soft and
not angry
not when I have no right to be.

except maybe I do have a right to be mad
maybe I am allowed to feel torn up about this
it’s not like I actually loved you but I got close enough to get hurt when you left and
you’re probably too busy thinking of your hands on her body to think about us and
the way you said my name when you moaned and
sorry was that a secret c'mon what does it matter now
this house has burned down you don’t read my poems you don’t miss me we haven’t talked in a week
there was no sirens no warning there was just me
drunk as fuck
and you
deciding you’ve had enough.

—  read at: 6:43 p.m. –lily rain
  • Emerald: By the way, he's Roman.
  • Roman: Yes. Thank you Emerald. She knows.
  • Emerald: He is the mean one.
  • Roman: Thank you Emerald!
  • Emerald: See? He is mad. Now he will stare at me until I stop talking. Then, when he thinks I am done talking, then he will start talking again.
  • Roman: -long pause- OK, I was talking to Ad-
  • Emerald: -interrupting him- Told you so.
  • Roman: GOD DAMN IT!

its so ironic when someone hurts you countless times, and when u do the same once they get mad and don’t talk to you. i am sick of having friends like this, i need someone stable and that can fight for me

so i just watched robert watching his mother die hahhaa and now i’m having feelings about it can you even imagine that at this point in time she was literally the one person he loved above all others (he loves jack don’t get me wrong but he’s still mad at him when she dies) and he watches her die. if you think that isn’t still fucking him up even now i cannot even stress how much it is.

lets talk about, then, the fact that aaron asks him to leave when they’re in the car. he wants robert to leave the one person he loves above all others in a car to die. can you imagine in that moment why roberts reaction was so strong and almost hysterical when he screams no?? aaron’s asking him to relive that nightmare only this time he’s asking robert to make the conscious choice to leave.

as if robert could; as if robert could live with himself after that; wanting to save his mum and being unable to, and having the ability to leave and just not.

what a parallel.

My dearest Ski Jumping Family!

This has been bugging me for a while, but during this (or last few, maybe) year our family changed a lot. 

The amount of hate going around is insane. 3-4 years ago if there was an anon hate the whole family would have gone insane and supportive for whoever received it.
Now it happens every day (several times) and noone bats an eye. 

When there is an opinion which is controversial with yours, you should talk about it, exchange info and behave like a normal human being and maybe at the end agree, that your opinions are different. But now if something happens that ppl don’t like they send anon hate and this makes me mad. And the messages are still not about defending their ideas or opinion but hurting people as much as they can. Insane.

Also I got into fights in the last few months, but proudly - fighting against nazi jokes is in my daily agenda. 

I will never get into big fights defending my opinion, bc I don’t give a fuck about what you think about me. But if you attack my friend, or anybody nice in this fandom I will fight for you till blood and death. Also hiding behind anons is beyond ridiculous. 

Spread the love, bring back the old Ski Jumping Family moral, please!

anonymous asked:

I AGREE WITH THAT ANON PLEASE WRITE FOR ELAMS

eventually, i will! maybe a little fic or one with multiple parts. 

until then here’s some headcanons bc why not

  • eliza + alex met first
  • alex introduces john to eliza
    • “eliza, meet john! john, this is eliza!” 
    • eliza’s really nice to john. she’s also very cute
    • eliza feels a little threatened (”am i not enough?? does he still love me?”) 
    • she tries to get over it
    • alex notices that she’s a little bugged by it so they talk
    • he reassures her that he doesn’t love he any less.
    • she can’t be mad for long because john is really cute and nice and she just wants alex to be happy
  • eliza starts to have feelings for john when he makes efforts to get to know her
    • “i went to get alex a coffee and i got you one too…he said that this was your favorite?”
    • “alex mentioned you were reading this book so i bought you the sequel too it…it’s, ah, no big deal, i dunno”
      • eliza blushes really hard
      • john’s just really sweet and really thoughtful
  • eliza asks john out after mustering up some courage
    • alex is so excited 
    • he’s like “bye you two~~”
    • eliza is a nervous, stammering mess but john is too
    • they laugh about it and it feels a little easier once they both express their nerves and confusion
      • “when alex told me about you, i freaked out! i-i didn’t want to be a home wrecker or something!”
      • “pfffttt–when he told me about you, i was jealous” 
      • “jealous? really? but you and alex are so cute and i felt so out of place” 
      • “are you kidding? you and alex are so cute”
    • they hit it off and that’s when john starts to fall in love with eliza
  • eliza is a bit of a mom friend even as they’re dating
    • she does little things like cleans alexander’s glasses or charges john’s phone when he forgets to
    • the boys love her a ton and smother her with kisses
  • john’s naturally very protective of the two
    • eliza can be too trusting at times…john tries to keep an eye on her.
    • alex can be a bit of a hothead so whenever alex is talking smack– john is there to either drag him out before he gets hurt or hurt the other person 
    • eliza freaks out when john gets into fights
      • he feels bad but better him than alex
  • alex is hopelessly in love with the two of them and the fact that they’re in love too makes him so happy
    • when they officially become a three, he takes john and eliza out on a date to celebrate!
      • they all hold hands at the same time for the first time and he melts
      • he’s so excited he has two of his most favorite people with him

bonus random headcanons:

  • eliza can carry john and alex
    • easily,,,
    • alex and eliza give each other piggy back rides if the other asks
    • john doesn’t understand it but it’s really cute
  • john can fall asleep anywhere
    • he naps a lot 
    • usually he’ll force alex to nap with him
    • if alex is too busy, eliza is always ready to cuddle with john
  • the first gift alex and eliza got john was a set of pjs so he could match with them
    • john cries
    • and then they all cry because they love each other so much
  • alex reads to eliza and john–usually just before bed
    • once they fall asleep, he reads one more paragraph/page/chapter of whatever book he’s reading and falls asleep with them
  • Kuroko: I am not talking to you.
  • Akashi: You’re so cute when you’re mad.
  • Kuroko: Do you want a piece of me?!
  • Akashi: I want all of you babe!
  • Kuroko: Unbelievable! *storms out*
  • Akashi: Come back! I absolutely love the tension between us!
4

Okay so this was the result of several different forces aligning to cause me to draw this comic without actively being asked.

I am not saying that I always think of Kaiba as being transgender, I’m saying that down the thousand roads you can take with fanfiction, it’s completely believable to me that Kaiba would be.  And this comic is why.

Because seriously I think of fanfic canon as a thousand roads and I am willing to entertain the feasibility of many of them.

Something that really bothers me when I talk to people about this kind of stuff is how many people do assume a character’s gender or orientation has anything to do with their outward appearance or attitude.

I can’t help but come away from conversations like that thinking “You haven’t had enough real life experience with The Closet."  (Like, I’m not even mad about this attitude, it’s just frustrates me and makes me a little sad.)

I say this as someone who has shocked and has been shocked.  (Although in the most extreme case, I admit to looking back and seeing signs– none of which had exactly to do with what the person was but did have to do with the fact that I was being unintentionally insensitive.  I feel bad about it, but I’m more mature and informed than I was in 2003.)

For me, The Closet was more than ten years of denial and emotional turmoil.  For others, The Closet is a nearly flawless mask.  For still others, it’s just the place you don’t even realize you are until somebody opens the door.  And it’s nowhere near as easy to tell that someone’s in there as people seem to think.

Gender expression has nothing to do with gender identity.  The same goes for sexuality.  And if Kaiba felt the need to stay in The Closet over something, you’d never even notice the signs because they wouldn’t even be there.

Also as far as I’m concerned this version of Seto keeps her adorable short hair.  :P

AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

(Seto hasn’t been getting much sleep, that’s why the shadows under her eyes.)

  • Kara: Cat texted me!
  • Kara: What do I say?!?
  • Kara: Should I ask when she's coming back?
  • Kara: Wait no that'll sound desperate she just left
  • Kara: I miss you?
  • Kara: No no no too soon
  • Kara: I need your guidance!
  • Kara: NO! I need to show her I can do this without her
  • Kara: Am talking too long to replY?
  • Kara: What if she gets mad that i don't answer her back immediately?
  • Kara: Ok ok I'll just text back hello
  • Kara: I ACCIDENTALLY TEXTED "HELP"
  • Kara: WHAT DO I DO NOW?? ALEX !!!

there are so many among you who i love so much, yes im a lonely soul, i am attached to your presence, and many of us face the same issues, even if we dont talk, theres this bond. and it always hurts when someone gets mad at me, or inexplicably leaves my realm of experience…. if i did something hurtful or wrong, just message me please. 

I don’t wanna be your friend. I wanna fall asleep feeling the heat of your body and kiss you until your lips burn like hell. I want you to hug me tight when I’m mad and talk about every thing that has ever happened in our lives at 3am.

Please stay. I know i annoy you most of the time. I am so clingy when it comes to you. Irritates you at times. Or sometimes i act like i don’t care but believe me i care for you more than anyone else. Sometimes i push you away and there are times that i don’t want to talk to anyone and to you. Sometimes i give you reasons to get mad. But i hope you won’t leave me. So please stay with me. I’m not perfect and i’m not the best. But i won’t leave you and i will stay with you. So please  don’t leave me behind, okay?
I wish I was able to spit out the words to make you understand, words that will burn your skin as they do my throat when I struggle to say them. I don’t talk about my feelings. My mind is so twisted and warped and complex that even the most sane person in the world would turn mad trying to understand what goes on in my head. I am completely mad. I have wandered so far from myself that the breadcrumbs of hope I’ve dropped have been crushed and there’s no chance that I’ll be able to find my way back. I’m lost on a journey that doesn’t have a destination. I’m traveling down the dark tunnel we call life and there’s no light in sight. I don’t want this to be a sob story about how I am sad because this is more than that. I seemed to have wandered into a dark place that I am not able to escape. I’m losing my emotions, my ability to distinguish what’s right and what’s wrong. I feel no remorse for my actions and I am craving pain. Whether I am receiving it or inflicting it, it is the only thing I’m able to feel besides numb. I can’t tell people this. I’m not able to explain what is happening to me because I’m not quite sure what to explain. All I know is there’s this emptiness inside of me. An emptiness that only temporarily fills when I am hurting someone or when I, myself, am hurting. What kind of sick mentality is that? I wish I was able to say the words, “I’m sorry,” and mean it but those words are just words. I wish I was able to say, “I love you,” and mean it but again, those words remain meaningless. I wish I was able to give you closure but that would mean I feel guilt and I don’t. I don’t feel anything. I make people believe in things I never believed in. I make people make homes out of me and then I make them watch me burn myself down. I paint on the personality the they perceive for me to have. Nothing about me is real. Nothing about this life is real. I am not real.
—  and that’s the best part.

anonymous asked:

dw, no ones mad at u for not shipping am//ed//ot anymore. we follow you for your personality and your wonderful artwork

The reason I assumed people were mad was because when I woke up this morning and checked Tumblr, I noticed that after I’d said I don’t really like the ship anymore, my follower count dropped pretty significantly. Of course, this could just be a coincidence, like maybe a few porn bots were deleted, but it still made me feel like I’d done something wrong.

anonymous asked:

Okay but a lot of KS fans who no problem writing rape fantasies, talking down to minors, ignoring mentally ill people, talking over gay men and just being general shit. Yet they're going to get mad because you want to hypothetically punch someone? Really?

cracks me up real good, i’m telling ya

ppl who are actually (albeit terribly) represented in ks: this is bad here’s why also i am rightfully angry and being non-literal when i say things out of anger

ks fans, who more often than not are non-korean (bonus points if their only knowledge of korea and our lgbt+ scene is limited to made up ship shit and kpop/kdramas), don’t have bpd/aren’t mentally ill, are women, and aren’t lgbt+ themselves:

YOU DARE SPEAK ILL OF OUR SIN…. OUR YAOIS…….. OUR SWEET SINNAMON ROLLS………………………… (PROBABLY MISPRONOUNCED) SANGWOO AND YOONBUM…………………………………..