when all my words are about you

If we should never see each other again, then all I ask is that you preserve the memory of the girl you once knew.
If by some chance, you should remember me from time to time – then remember me the way that I was; young and happy and free… Remember my imperfections through nostalgia’s softened lens… let them blur and merge into everything that you loved about me.
Don’t remember when I cried… just that I laughed.
Don’t remember how difficult I was to reach – only that I was incredible to hold.
Remember the curve of my smile, or the glint in my eye whenever I would look at you or the way that moonlight looked upon my skin. Because perhaps in a way, it is a blessing that you will never see me aging… that you’ll never know when my health is failing…
so don’t imagine me ever changing… Remember me always as the girl that I was… remember the way that I loved you… and remember that I always will…

so, to be blunt, the clique sucks. not all of you, no, but a majority of the clique sucks. a lot of us lack respect, not only for tyler and josh, but for other artists, bands, and their fanbase, such as melanie martinez and the crybabies. (the melanie hate was very very strong on the clique amino app)

i know i’m not being any better than they are now, by ranting about all this, but i NEED to get it off my chest.

let’s start off with the whole fake fan thing. there is no such thing as a ‘fake fan’! only NEW fans! if you meet someone who only knows the radio hits, introduce them to more songs! back when i first got into tøp, i bought a blurryface shirt with lane boy lyrics on it, despite only listening to the song a few times and i hadn’t memorized EVERY word. i wore it to church one night and a clique member ran up to me and busted out rapping the whole song and i got pretty freaked out! i told her that i’d only listened to the song maybe three times and she rolled her eyes, called me a fake fan, and left me alone with my little emo eyeliner and my little emo self. it hurt me, because she was degrading me in the fanbase for not knowing all the words to lane boy.

next let’s talk about faking suicide. that’s OBVIOUSLY not okay. suicide is a very, very serious thing that shouldn’t be joked about. i see it happen within the clique all the time, both real suicides and fake, and both hurt me very badly. but in different ways. do you realize how many people you’re hurting by faking your own death, all for attention? tyler isn’t going to write a song about you, you know, because you “died”.

now the address leaking, ah, the address leaking. that’s tyler and jenna’s personal life and their privacy. they had JUST moved into this new house! they must have felt so unsafe in their own home, which is supposed to be a place of comfort and protection from all you crazy, rabid fans trying to rip his clothes and steal his shoes. how safe would you feel if someone leaked your address online for the whole world to see?

next we have the crashed wedding. that whole thing was so, so disrespectful. that was josh’s friend’s wedding. if you were famous, and went to your friend’s big special day, and a fan decided to break in in the middle of it just to get a picture with you, would you feel annoyed or upset? because in the picture the girls took with him, josh looked pretty pissed. and josh has the right to say “no” to anybody who wants a picture with him. he doesn’t have to do whatever you say, your wish isn’t his command, and that goes for tyler too. ever wonder why they walk fast in public, and why tyler started hearing hoods and baseball caps to cover his face lately? to hide from us.

the crap with the crybabies. it’s nuts. y'all are making nasty comments about melanie’s appearance, and personally, i think mel is a very beautiful young woman. the real ugly people are the ones who made fun of her and her fans, they’re ugly on the inside. it isn’t right. i know that you would all feel awful if someone told you that your tooth gap was the 8th wonder of the world or made rude comments on your eyebrows. mel is a human being, and so are all of her fans, so start treating them with respect. because EVERY human deserves respect.

i understand why the clique is so hated. we’re mostly made up of awful people. i feel bad for tyler and josh because they deserve better fans than us. they deserve respectful, thoughtful people that wait patiently for new music instead of rabid, rude kids who spam their social media accounts, pretty much harassing them and pressuring them into releasing new music, commenting “i love you” constantly on their posts, and invading their personal lives and their privacy.

that’s it. that’s all i have to say. the clique sucks and i’m pretty ashamed that i even called myself a clique member. until you all clean up your act, i’m not one of you. i’m not a part of the clique anymore, i’m simply someone who listens to tøp. i’m just a fan. i refuse to identify as part of this madhouse called the skeleton clique. feel free to rb and rant about it yourself. i’m done

anonymous asked:

Dear senpai, I hope you had a great day. I'm following your advice in writing more but I kinda get easily discouraged when your wonderfuls fics and compared it to my shitty ass poop writing.

NO, NO, NO!  Two cakes!  It’s two cakes!  Writing is not a competition.  It is about contribution.  Your readers get your words and your ideas woven into their heads, and you have brightened their day.  They aren’t sitting there thinking, gosh, this is terrible, they are invested in your story.  You have brought them joy. 

I know it is hard not to compare yourself to others, and I will admit that I’m a giant hypocrite here b/c I see my favorite writers’ works and I wonder when people will notice that I shouldn’t be here, so we all do it, BUT, you can’t let that stop you from writing, because no one else can write your words.  No one else can tell your story.  You are the only person in the whole world who can do that, so if you don’t do it, it won’t exist.  Just because someone else does it, too, doesn’t make your’s any less, because if you don’t do it, literally no one else can or will.  We will be left with only one cake when we could’ve had two. 

We want all the cake. 

About Jared’s latest pics…

yes, the ones of him and Valery…

First of all, there’s an unfollow button on the right upper corner of my blog, just in case you need to click on it. What I’m about to say here might offend some people’s susceptibilities. I don’t mince words when it comes to express my opinion. This is my blog and I’ve got the right to express what I feel here, there’s no better place for me to state my opinion regarding certain topics. So if you don’t agree with my opinion and want to lash out at me, you’d better unfollow me or even block me. I don’t take bullshit from anyone and I have neither the patience nor the time to deal with stupidity or drama, ok????

Having said that, I’ll get to the point. Jared and his alleged girfriend.

When I saw these pics, I knew they would provoke all sorts of reactions and of course negative and even insulting comments.Especially because we saw other pics of them a couple of months ago. There’s something I can’t put up with and that’s the disrespect and the insulting comments towards Jared, Valery or any other people. You don’t have to regard her as a sl*t only because you assume she’s with him. The same with Jared, you don’t have to insult him because she’s with her.

Seriously, I don’t understand why the drama regarding this girl. I mean, she’s just a young woman who happens to hang out with a man double her age. It’s unbelievable how many people (women) start to freak out every time there are new pics of them being together. Seriously guys, such attitude verges on the obsession. That man ain’t gonna be yours, you know?

They’re not doing any harm to you if they’re dating (if it was the case). If she’s his gf, or fwb, or whatever, it’s their problem and only they know what kind of relationship they have and they don’t have to give explanations to the world. However weird their relationship might be, Jared doesn’t owe any explanation to anyoneThat’s his problem, not yours.

There’s no need to bash him only because he seems to like young girls half his age. He’s not the first or the last man in this world to like or date pretty young girls. That’s his problem, not yours

And for those who think he’s gay and he uses her to pretend he’s straight (yeah, I’ve read comments like these somewhere), if it were the case, again, that’s his problem, not yours.

For all those people (women) who begin to destroy him everytime pics like these appear, I have a question for you: Is your life going to be better if that girl disappear from Jared’s life???? I mean, are you going to be happier, more beautiful, more successful, find a better job or have more money if she’s away from him????? Will all your real problems (problems of your daily life) disappear all of a sudden???? Or do you really think your chances of becoming Mrs. Leto will increase???? If the answer is yes, you need a psychiatrist. Seriously, I don’t see why the fact of Jared being with that girl should disturb you to the extent to post nasty comments about them. Jared has the right to date whoever he wants. And if he happens to like her and it turns out to be she brings happiness to him, then so be it. It’s his PRIVATE life after all. Not yours.

If you don’t like what he does, stop following him. Life is full of choices and there are many artists out there whom to follow.

LET JARED ALONE. GET A LIFE PEOPLE. LIVE AND LET LIVE. MIND YOUR OWN BUSSINESS.

Thank You So Fucking Much


When i make these milestone post, i usually just type in all caps and am really obnoxious, but this one if different.

500 of you have clicked on my profile, read some of my stuff, or seen my posts and decided to followed me. 

Five hundred people, that’s insane. I’ve never been good with words (which is ironic bc i write fanfiction but that’s beside the point) but i hope you guys know how grateful i actually am. 

Especially for the revisiting followers, i see your names and i smile and i recognize you. I always wanna send you asks and say thank you but this isnt my primary account so the asks would come out of my personal blog. 

But please know I really do appreciate every single one of you. 

I, of course, wanna thank the loml, @gubl-oser for being so sweet towards me. She’s the type of person I hoped to meet through this account. I’ve never had an internet friend and i’m so happy to say she’s my first one.  She’s a big motivation for me and I love Oakes with my whole heart. 

And, of course, I HAVE to thank @dontshootmespence because she’s the whole reason i made this blog. She’s a HUGE inspiration to me, thank you so damn much. Please know you and your writing does have an impact. I love you, and thank you. 

I could say ‘thank you’ 8 million more times and it still wouldn’t be enough. Just know I love and appreciate all 500 of you.  

930 words today, which is about what I’ve been hitting for the past week or so.  (And to hit that number, I need to start writing in the middle of the day and get around 400-500 words then, rather than leaving it all for the evening when I can’t get into the proper headspace.  The last year’s been a fucking mess as far as my ~process goes.)

Today there is a snippet! Because this scene doesn’t give anything away.  Awkward Ex-Jedi Talk About Feelings, Discover The Flaw In This Plan.

Snippet from Ahsoka 28.

“Mustafar sounds unpleasant,” she said eventually, and heard Kanan huff out laughter.

“Yeah,” he said. “That’s one word for it.”

“Did you ever think of running away?”

“I thought about everything at least once,” Kanan said simply.  “But I couldn’t do that to Hera.  I wouldn’t do that to Hera.”

Ahsoka set her jaw.  “You know there’s a reason that the Order warned against attachments.”

“The Order’s been ashes on its pyre for a long time now,” Kanan said.

Ahsoka scratched at the base of her montrals, briefly dislodging her headband.  He wasn’t wrong, but after all this time it still hurt to admit it.  “For someone trying to claim the title of Jedi, you’re not doing a very good job at living up to it.”

“Thanks, I didn’t think I’d told myself that enough times.”

No, Ahsoka thought wearily. This wasn’t going very well at all, though at least the situation seemed to have made Kanan somewhat more inclined to talk to her.  It was just a pity that under the circumstances Ahsoka couldn’t think of anything of substance to discuss.

anonymous asked:

I love seeing your fangirling over holby city lady it's so cute, but I just saw your post about Michelle Gomez, do you only like older women haha :P this is a joke but I worded it awkwardly but it's anonymous and I'm sending anyway okay bye

bless u nony lmao honestly you’re a saint if you’re still here after all my gay holby yelling

also i wish i was joking when i say that i don’t fancy anyone unless they’re like, at least 35. this is……  a problem™

anonymous asked:

While improvising a movie is obviously risky and can be seen as half-assing it, the first Iron Man was rushed into production and barely had a script when filming started, that's what Stane's actor has recalled.

I’m not talking about iron man??? Like that movie doesn’t apply to my rant at all??? Iron man had a limited time frame with a director that actively asked his actors to improvise because he didn’t really have a script. That’s a WHOLE other ballgame. That’s not the actor’s fault. That’s the actor working with what he/she has. Also half the time rdj doesn’t even use words. He uses a lookTM which like all editors ADORE because it means not using sound. 

Like, If you don’t have a script you are OBVIOUSLY gonna make it up. The editing team knows this from the get go. You work very differently in such a situation.

If you have a lucid dream, do not commit any acts of violence against the things you meet

by reddit user professionalsuccubus

I had my first lucid dream at age nine.

I was in a decrepit neighborhood – rotting porches, peeling paint, Spanish moss hanging off dormers, the works. Mist swirled around my ankles as I walked slowly through the streets. Like an old video game, the horizon was both unchanging and unreachable.

I wandered around, in and out of the cobwebby houses. Although the streets were empty, the houses usually had a few ghosts floating around. There were a few children, but they were mostly old people, in various stages of decay. They never hurt me, nor did they speak. They just floated. Sometimes they’d follow me, but I never felt threatened.

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Buying me something designer and expensive will never fill my stomach with the butterflies that appear when I’m about travel and fly out instead. It’s cheaper too. Understand that experiences will always outweigh materialism. I don’t want new meaningless possessions, I want to lay up with you at 80 and laugh about all the memories we created in our youth.

- Meggan Roxanne
things people in my theatre class have said (part 2)

“and then emma is going to cross downstage—where’s emma” (everyone simultaneously looks up. emma is on the catwalk) “hey guys you look really short from up here”

(violent twirling of ribbons) “IM A WATERBENDER”

“so im going to write a musical called tree #3 the musical and the whole thing is just the tree standing onstage and singing this note:” (high-pitched screeching) “sounds groundbreaking”

“my favorite musical that we did was probably seussical” “isnt that the one where you face planted on the stage” “shhhh we don’t talk about that”

“wait i get to fake slap aidan” “yeah” “FINALLY”

“can you maybe chill?” “how bout maybe you chill?” “OH MY GOD YOU TOO?”

“there’s literally no music i can play right now. it’s all percussion. what the fuck.”

“one word summary of yourself” “gay”

“wow i can’t believe how good friends elphaba and glinda are” “harold…..” “wait what my name’s michael” “…harold….”

“FUCK YEAH FRUIT ROLLUPS”

“actually, did you know that in 19th century russia—” (from across the stage) “WE WRITE LETTERS WE WRITE LETTERS”

“see we call the small max maxahundred cause hes the youngest. then the medium max is maxathousand. then the big max is maximillian.” “OH MY GOD”

“when you think about it….. everything is illuminati”

i still remember the way your skin felt against mine; soft but still rough. remember how my pale skin was the perfect contrast to your tanned one.
i remember the way you used to lightly trace my face with your fingertips, never applying to much pressure as if you were too scared of hurting me.
i remember how soft your hair felt and how it  annoyed you when i constantly ran my fingers through it, even if you had just styled it.
i remember your voice, still. it was deep and smooth, always calming me when i was feeling anxious or sad. it is, to this day, my favourite sound.
i remember the colour of your eyes and how it still resembles my favourite chocolate. remember, how i got lost in them the first time i ever spoke to you, and how it changed my outlook on brown eyes that i always found boring and not the least special.

i wonder for how much longer i will remember all these little things.
i wonder when skin will become just skin again,
when your touch will become just one of many i’ve felt in my life.
wonder, when the softness of your hair will be long forgotten,
when your voice will turn into just another sound,
and your brown eyes will resemble just another pair of boring, brown eyes.
i wonder if i’ll ever forget and if i do, just know that it was not on purpose. if i could keep remembering them accurately for the rest of my life, then i would.

—  e.s. // all the little things about you that i wish i could remember forever.
[TRANS] ‘Seventeen’ Magazine 2017 Aug Issue - BTS Interview (P2)

JPN - KRN © cher_bts
KRN - ENG © ktaebwi

Currently on tour, BTS’ popularity has crossed borders and is spreading around the world!

RAP MONSTER: We came to many countries but Brazil left the most impression on me. I learned for the first that through the local news that they set up tents and stayed outside the concert venue few days ahead to buy our concert tickets.
JIMIN: I was really surprised!
SUGA: We travel around the world but mostly we just stay inside the hotel. I use the remaining time to make music there. That’s why I always carry around music equipment.
RAP MONSTER: You have a pot too. (laughs) He uses an electric pot to boil water and cook ramyeon or instant food he brought from Korea to eat.
J-HOPE: It’s really important. I bring a pillow too. It’s not too firm or too soft and fits my neck perfectly. I don’t have to worry even if the hotel’s pillow doesn’t fit!
JIN: I play guitar which I’m into lately in the hotel. We all do what each of us wants.
V: I bring my favorite book of Gogh and read it.
JUNGKOOK: I’m listening to music on my speaker… But the other members often scold me.
V: They said it’s too noisy. (laughs)
J-HOPE: When we say so he lowers the volume. (laughs) One time Rap Monster scolded him and he turned the volume down, but he couldn’t hear the sound like that so he brought the speaker to his ears to listen. I laughed and asked if he did all of that so he could listen on speaker.
JUNGKOOK: I told you the sound is different!
RAP MONSTER: What does Jimin bring?
JIMIN: I don’t bring anything special. Bringing myself is enough ♡

The real side of each person only the members know.

JIMIN: Our leader Rap Monster-hyung is a clumsy “destruction god”. Not just breaking stuffs, he also loses his phone time to time, tripping when there’s nothing around, or spilling coffee and stain Jin-hyung’s shirt… It happens a lot. (laughs)
SUGA: But he’s really smart. He’s got an excellent language ability and he’s the best at Japanese.
RAP MONSTER: I’m embarrassed~
V: J-hope is the dance leader, he dances the best. He’s also reliable and takes care of us well.
J-HOPE: I’m just doing my job.
JUNGKOOK: Are you being humble? (laughs)
J-HOPE: I’m serious. (laughs)
RAP MONSTER: Jin-hyung - the matnae* - takes care of us well too. He likes food so he cooks for us at the dorm or…
JIN: I’m busy recently so I can’t cook at all. I’m not eating a lot for my diet too.
SUGA: He shares a room with me. I hate when it’s loud so he always stays quiet for my sake. I like quietness and hate when there are too many people.
RAP MONSTER: He suddenly talks about himself when we’re talking about other members. Suga-hyung is really “mypace”**. And he’s always spaced out and lethargic. (laughs)
SUGA: I’m lethargic because I need to prepare my energy for music. Told you it all has a meaning! Jimin is “Slow Jimin”, this one word is enough. J-hope is the fastest and Jimin is the slowest. That’s the daily life of BTS.
JIN: But Jimin works harder than anyone else. He always dances or sings in the waiting room
RAP MONSTER: Is it the result of his effort? He has a cute face and great muscles.
SUGA: But… He’s always late.
ALL: (laugh)
JIMIN: Let’s talk about V next.
JUNGKOOK: He really is an amazing person.
V: I’m not amazing~
JUNGKOOK: He says that but he’s really amazing. (laughs) He talks out of the topic or question, even when everyone else is all “?”, he ignores and continues. And he forcefully makes everyone understand him.
V: I’m working hard on talking to the point too! But what can I do when I can’t think of anything? It’s hard for me too!
J-HOPE: I didn’t know that. (laughs) Our maknae Jungkook, as you can see, he’s perfectly handsome.
V: Is he always handsome like that? Hmh, is he…? When he sleeps… (giggles)
JUNGKOOK: What? (nervous)
J-HOPE: Nothing, you’re handsome when you seep too. It’s okay. (laughs)

*matnae: mathyung (eldest hyung) + maknae
**mypace: living or doing things without being affected by other people’s opinions or actions

The never-ending chatter of men! The close-knitted 7 people. When asked “What boosts your mood up?”, nearly all of them answered “The members”.

JIN: Sometimes we need to go work on our own… I indeed gets bored. It’s the same when we film individual cuts for music videos, if the members aren’t around I feel lonely.
JIMIN: The one who boosts my mood up is our maknae Jungkook. He’s mischievous so he always makes us laugh. But Jungkook said he likes tasty food more than me…
JUNGKOOK: Tasty food makes me happy ♡ If there’s food in front of me, I would take a bite out of happiness. Even if I’m full, it’s fine. I’ll get hungry soon after I sleep for a bit. I can keep eating all the time. (laughs)

For the question “What do you want to have at the moment?”, the answers of these 7 people who are busy everyday are!

RAP MONSTER: Time. I want to have some time with my family. I want to travel with my family. We had a concert in Japan last year and my parents along with my sister went on a trip. I couldn’t go with them… I was really upset.
J-HOPE: I have never had a family trip before too. I want to travel with my family!
JUNGKOOK: I want to travel too. To America or Japan. Who do I want to go with? (glances at J-hope sitting beside) J-hope-hyung ♡
J-HOPE: Wow! I’m happy! Jungkook finally knew how to live in life. (laughs)
V: I want to have time too, but I want to have paintings more. I like Gogh the most. There are around 10 paintings in my room.
JUNGKOOK: Are they real?
J-HOPE: If those are real they would cost hundreds of millions. (laughs)
JIN: I want to have an island. I filmed on some island last time and they said it can be bought with 30 billion.
RAP MONSTER: You don’t need to buy an island. We’re going to Hawaii or Okinawa anyway. (laughs) Oh snap, it’s time to end the interview! Let’s greet properly for the ending.
SUGA: Please listen to our single “Blood, Sweat & Tears” a lot and look forward to our Japan tour too. Please give BTS a lot of love!
RAP MONSTER: Our hearts are always… Seventeen ♡

P1

Vibe: In a low-key yet over crowded venue, inhaling the strongest scent of the finest herbs, dancing next to a speaker, feeling the bass travel and vibrate through your body, carelessly unbothered about the ringing noise in your ear that will torment you the following morning. Listening to that type of reggae music that just makes you walk on the spot or whine on someone all night, randomly throwing a gun finger in the air when the DJ reloads and lighting your lighter.

- Meggan Roxanne

A brazen challenge

Synopsis: Imagine admitting to Loki that you never manage to orgasm when are with men, making him smirk mischievously in response.

“Is that a challenge, my dear?”

So for the next couple of hours, he magically locks the two of you in your room and makes it a challenge as to how many times he can make you cum in a row. He pleasures you with his soft hands, his skilled and long fingers and his silver tongue before he fucks you roughly.

Pairing: Loki x Reader
Rating: M
Chapter: 1/1 (Oneshot)
Words: 4040
Warnings: smut. a lot of smut.

Keep reading

Come Back to Me (Part Six)

Fandom: Marvel
Ship: Peter Parker x Reader
Requested: Yes
Genre: Angstish
Warnings: None

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten

Originally posted by stallingdemons

Peter and you had pretended that what you had been calling in your head “The Incident” never happened. He never repeated the words of “I always worry about you”, you never held his arm in your grip for more than a mere few seconds, he never cradled your face with his hands, and you never realized you loved him. To the two of you, it was like the day never existed.

You both moved on, acting as you normally would, but you were much more conscious of your actions. You thought Peter was, too. You didn’t act on impulse and grab his arm, or hand, or lean into him without thinking. And he didn’t leave you with small touches as he walked past you in the hallway, or ask constantly with a blatant worried expression how you were doing.

And you didn’t mind. You were best friends, not lovers. You didn’t mind.

“What’s up with you and Peter?” Ned suddenly appeared next to you as you stood in line to get on the bus, ready for the school field trip to take up the day of classes.

“I- what?” You asked, looking at him confusedly. You weren’t sure why he was asking this.

“You and Peter. You guys have been acting weird around each other lately. What happened?”

You still looked at him, confused. “Nothing happened. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Did you tell him you liked him or something, because-”

“Shhh!” You hushed him immediately, placing your hands over his mouth. “Someone could hear you!”

He grabbed your wrists, removing them from his mouth, but still holding onto them. “Just tell him already,” he said, quieter this time.

“You know I can’t do that, Ned,” you replied back, furrowing your eyebrows.

You loved him, you loved him, you loved him.

You tried to push the thought out of your mind, and you had been trying to do so ever since “The Incident”. But with the words continuously repeating in your head, day in and day out, you didn’t think they would ever leave.

“I think-”

“Hey guys,” you heard Peter’s voice from behind you and whipped your head towards him, worried about how much of the conversation he had heard. As you and Ned both looked at him, he met neither of your eyes. His were trained one where Ned’s hands were clasped around your wrists.

You turned your eyes back to look at Ned, and both of your eyes widened when you realized what Peter was staring at. He let you rip your wrists from his grasp, and he shoved his hands into his pockets after letting yours go. You looked down at the ground nervously. 

“What’s up?” Ned spoke, looking at Peter. You took a few seconds to compose yourself before looking at him too. His eyebrows were furrowed as he looked between the two of you.

“Uh, nothing, I just,” he didn’t look either of you in the eye. “Ned, want to sit with me on the bus?”

You bit your lip. You remembered that you and Peter had agreed to sit on the bus together just last week. You didn’t say anything when Ned said, “Sure.”

You looked down at the ground as Ned moved in front of you to stand next to Peter, and you were stood behind them as they spoke in lightning speed between them. That was never how it was with you and Peter. The two of you would speak slowly, listening intently to each other’s words to not miss even a detail of what was said. 

You liked it that way. You liked how Peter would furrow his eyebrows lightly, biting his lip as he stared at you, looking as if he was concentrating to all of his ability, solely on you. You liked how he would murmur little “mhm”s as you would go on, and he would only start speaking when he was sure you were done. You liked how he listened to you.

It was a vast difference from seeing him now, and you wondered which way he preferred: fast-paced with Ned, or slow-paced with you. You always thought he preferred how he spoke with you, but now, seeing him grin with Ned as they easily threw words back at each other within seconds, you weren’t so sure.

You looked down at the ground sadly. You never remembered feeling so lonely before, especially with Peter always making sure to include you in everything. You turned around and walked out of the line without saying anything to the two boys who seemed to not even notice you leave. You glanced behind your shoulder as you were walking away, but you were only greeted by the sight of Peter still grinning at Ned.

“Hey, (Y/N),” you heard a voice say ahead of you and you looked up to see Michelle waiting in line, a few people back from where you previously stood, with a book in her hands.

“Oh, hey,” you forced a smile on your face, but the only thought that was bombarding your mind was, 

You love him. He doesn’t love you. You love him. He doesn’t love you.

“Want to sit with me?” She asked, a knowing smile on her face. You gave her a real smile in response, moving into the space next to her.

“Thanks, MJ,” you said softly, head leaning back down to aim at the floor.

“He looked back at you,” she said, opening her book and beginning to read it. She stared down at it as you lifted your head to stare at her.

“What?” You asked, confused.

“Peter,” she elaborated, and your heart sped up at the mention of his name.

You needed to get this under control.

“What about Peter?” You asked, looking ahead of the line at him and Ned, where you saw them still talking.

“He looked back at you when you turned around and came my way.”

Your eyes widened the smallest bit. You didn’t want to believe her words so easily, because for all you could know, she was only telling you this to cheer you up. But still, you found your sadness deflate slightly.

“No, he didn’t,” you said, trying to convince yourself. “I turned around and looked. He was still talking to Ned.”

“Right when you turned around and started walking away,” she said. She was still looking at her book, but you weren’t so sure she was actually reading it. “He looked at you for a second. And when you turned around to look at him, he turned back around to Ned.” 

“I, uh,” you stumbled over your words, not quite knowing what to think.

Why hadn’t he said anything? You and Peter would always be immediate to speak up if noticing something was wrong with the other. Neither of you ever hesitated on that. So why had he today?

“He looked at me,” you said monotonously, but Michelle knew it was a question. She knew you needed to hear it again.

“He looked at you,” she replied. She looked up from her book for a few moments to meet your eyes. “He looked a little worried to me, if I’m being honest.” She quirked her eyebrow at you for a quick second, smirking lightly, before looking back down at her book.

You looked back down to the ground, thinking.

But why didn’t he say anything?

***************************
I know it may seem like it’s taking a while for them to get together (or will they end up together?), but I want to make sure it’s realistic enough. After being friends for years, neither of them would want to chance ruining their friendship so easily by confessing after not being completely sure about themselves—and each other—yet. I hope you guys understand that! Let me know what you guys think of this one and voice your opinions! Whether they’re good or bad, I want to hear them! Requests are open, and if you guys want to send something from a prompt list I reblog, please let me know which list you’re asking from!

~e

okay i know Hardeen was a Terrible arc for everyone involved, but what if Obi Wan had told Anakin about faking his death? Anakin’s like no worries dude I Got This, except he really. does not,,

the only reason his “acting” is remotely believable is because almost no one has seen him like this before, so it must be due to all the grief and loss and heartbreak and anger and whatnot

he starts by sobbing over Obi Wan’s supposedly dead body for a solid two hours when Obi gets shot down. “LOOK at him, so cold and Lifeless. D: HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE WARM AND FULL OF LIFE, SNIPS. I know last week I checked his pulse because he was meditating so calmly I thought he passed away in his sleep, BUT HE’S USUALLY SO WARM AND FULL OF LIFE.”

It goes on until Anakin has finished everything on his painstakingly written Outline from last night. At least half of Coruscant hears part of this speech. Mace sends Obi the security footage later, at a time he knows Anakin will be there to sit through it with Obi, because if we had to suffer then you do too, Obi Wan. 

then at the funeral, Anakin pulls out a twenty foot scroll of real actual paper, because he would appreciate this, I think, and clears his throat loudly and messily before telling the council that he has prepared a few words for the greatest jedi this order, nay, this GALAXY has ever seen, and will ever see, no matter how long any of us live—

five hours later,, he’s still going strong. half the eulogy is Terrible and V Cringeworthy, but the other half is actually v heartfelt and moving. even Mace and Yoda have to blink away some tears. 

it becomes easier after Anakin starts going into Unnecessary Details about obi wan’s life, like how he’ll miss holding onto those heavy 327 thread count woolen robes when he’s saving obi’s ass (curvature 48.5 degrees) for the 23094th time, and how he’ll never see a more sincere expression of Compassion than he saw when reading line 83 of Obi Wan’s eighth letter to Duchess Satine last month, quoted now as follows— 

Ahsoka enlists Plo Koon’s help and they finally shuffle him over to the side, promising him they can finish his fake eulogy at the council dinner tonight. Obi Wan’s death may be fake, but MY WORDS ARE REAL, SNIPS, HOW DARE YOU. says Anakin, before he (a little gleefully) starts destroying the walls to show how Emotionally Compromised he is over this 100% real death. 

he takes the 212th drinking, after having told all of them, too. so now there are 293637 men crying about Obi Wan (relatable af, y/y), all of which have the acting talent of a wilted blade of grass. there are 283747 toasts, and every single person there cries for each and every one of them, despite everyone knowing obi is still alive

Hers

And there he stands in all his glory, laughing at something Chris Nolan said to him, a glass of whisky in his hand and his arm around her waist. And all I could do was stand here, from afar, watching them.

“He’ll notice if you keep staring, darling.” Anne handed me a glass of champagne.

“I-I-I was not staring. Just looking how wonderful they are together.” I could feel my face turn red by the second.

“Oh, darling, don’t try to fool yourself, I know you have feelings for him.” She smiled lightly at me. “Actually, I always thought you’re going to be together.”

My smile faltered and I looked at the floor. Silly Y/N, of course Anne knew. Apparently, everybody did! The boys, Gemma, Lou and now Anne. Clearly, I am not very good in hiding my feelings for my best friend. The guy who knows me better than anyone and yet can’t realize how much I adore him.

Harry and I have been friends since we were kids, really. Eventually we went separate ways: He went out to become the biggest celebrity out there and I went to college. Even though we lived in different worlds, we never stopped talking. We’re still best friends even after all this time.

I love him.

But it wasn’t always like this. When we’re younger, our parents used to tell us we would eventually get married. We’re too perfect for each other, that’s something we always knew, even though we didn’t have this types of feeling for each other.

It was in my senior year of college that this said feelings started to show. I spent a few weeks with him and the boys while they’re on tour and suddenly I started to fall for my best friend. If you have seen any movie out there, you would think that the feeling was mutual and we’re happily ever after. Not how things turned out, I’m afraid to tell you. I spent 6 weeks trying to find a way to tell him my feelings, even asked for the boys’ help, but when I was close to figure a way out, he met her. And gosh, how much he adored her. Since the beginning!

You know that stupid line that said when you love someone, you gotta let them go and find their happiness? His happiness was she and I couldn’t stand in the way of that. Even though I knew I loved him more than she could ever love him, it was time for me to set him free.

So I came back. Came to the UK, finished college and found a job I actually like. My life is all put together, as Harry likes to remind me. He’s right, my life is put together, except for my love life. I tried so hard to get over him, to not have feelings for him. I dated, I tried everything I could, but he was always there, in the back of my mind, even when I met my ex-boyfriend, Daniel. We broke up a few months later because he knew I had feelings for my best friend. Poor Dan, such a nice guy and I couldn’t love him.

Harry came back home. And moved in with her, much to my dismay. They’re together for 3 years now and they don’t seem to be breaking up anytime soon. I’m not gonna lie, I’ve thought about telling him, just to get it out of my chest, but I can’t. I cannot ruin this for him. I would rather suffer in silence than ruin his happiness and our friendship.

“Have you thought about telling him?” She asked me while we watched the couple from afar.

“I did.” I whispered. “I just can’t. He’s happy, Anne. He deserves to be happy.”

“My son is a fool, darling. He doesn’t know, but he does have feelings for you. A mother always know and I’m telling you he does. But I understand your side, I just don’t wanna see you both losing time with other people when you could be together!”

I breathed a laugh. Anne was always our biggest supporter, so it’s not a shock to me she would rather me with her son than his actual girlfriend. The poor girl is not a bad girl; she’s just not right for him.

She doesn’t get it how he can be such a morning person, always waking up at a 100%, telling everyone ‘good morning’ in his raspy voice. She thinks its annoying, but the truth is if he doesn’t do this, we’ll go back to sleep and miss his whole day. She doesn’t get his obsession for good health, but if she just asked him about it, she would understand he actually believes that those junk foods can kill you slowly, and he can’t lose anyone in his life, so we all have to eat health food. At least around him. She doesn’t understand how he can feel so down after reading mean comments on the internet, because for her how could The Harry Styles feel anything less than perfect?! He thinks he’s not worth it, even though he truly does deserve everything good that ever happened to him. However, he has insecurities, because by the end of the day, he is just Harry. And all he really wants is cuddles and a few reassurance words that those people are just mean people and are not telling the truth.

She doesn’t know him and a part of me thinks she just doesn’t want to. Yes, she knows what he likes for breakfast, what calms him when his in a bad mood, but she doesn’t know the little things I do.

It’s sad, if you think about it. He’s been with her for 3 years and she doesn’t get him. Maybe that’s why when he needs someone, he runs to me. He runs to my house at 3 A.M just so he could talk about his bad day. She never saw him cry, because he only cries when we’re alone and he can truly show his feelings. I’m the first person he calls when something good or bad happens. I’m his emergence contact in the hospital, I’m his safe place to go when he needs to just take a break. I’m the one who could leave her whole life on hold, just to take care of him when needed.

It’s sad because even thought I am his person, I’m not his and he’s not mine. She has him and I can’t truly express how much I wish that could be me.

“He looks nervous.” I pointed out to Anne.

“I was about to ask you this… Do you know why? He’s been like this for a few weeks now.” She looked deep in thought, trying to find a reason for her son odd behavior.

“I think…” I was interrupted by Louis, who looked out of breath.

“You need to stop him, he will make a terrible mistake, please Y/N, stop him!”

“Louis, what’s going on? What are you talking about? Breathe, Lou.”

“You don’t get it, he’ll…”

“Can I have everyone’s attention, please?” Harry called out from the center of the room. The party quickly died down, waiting for his speech. “I would like to thank you all for coming to my Dunkirk party. It’s so nice to enjoy the movie’s success with all of you, so thank you!”

Everyone around the room clapped and Louis was fussing by side. He looks nervous and I couldn’t understand why.

“As you know this is a special night for me and I wanted to be even more special. Lexa, can you come here, darling?” He asked his girlfriend to join him and I could already feel the tension growing around me. Anne, Louis, Niall, Liam, Lou and Gemma surrounded me and we all were just waiting for something to happen. Anything.

“Lexa, we’ve been together for 3 years next week and I feel so blessed to have you by side. I was smitten with you since the moment I saw you, you can ask Y/N for confirmation.” Everybody laughed a little and I could feel a knot in my through already. “So, in this special date for me and surrounded by friends and family, I would like to ask you…” he got down on one knee. “Will you marry me?”

And just like that my world stopped. I couldn’t hear anything, but I could see her nod and everyone clap for them. I think the boys were talking to me, but I could barely understand what was happening.

He proposed to her.

He is hers.

She is his.

And just like that I realized that all these years loving him, taking care of him, weren’t enough to make him fall for me. I was a silly girl who believed in the fairy tale that everyone thought we would live. I loved him with everything in me, I was always his but he was never mine.

And just like that I ran out of the party, leaving everyone – including the love of my life – behind.

I was always his.

He was never mine.

He was always hers.

*** 

Part 2

It’s been a while, I know, but I hope you’ve liked this. Please, leave me your thoughts about this oneshot, talk to me pleeease. Sorry for any mistakes, English is not my first language!

All the love, B. 

MASTERLIST

Passionfruit | 2

Namjoon is not at all what you expected him to be.

Originally posted by namxingruinedme

pairing: namjoon x reader
genre: smut
wordcount: 7.1k

part one



You were used to judgment.

It came in many shapes and forms. Men’s roaming gazes as you walked past. The way guys would leer at you, objectifying you with their stares and their wolf whistles. You were used to coming face to face with judgment. 

People made assumptions about you and always had. Guys you slept with always approached you and you knew they had seen you and made a snap judgment about who you were. Girls who saw you narrowed their eyes and protectively put a hand on their boyfriends knees when you walked past. People saw you and decided that they knew who you were, you didn’t have a say in the matter. In their eyes you were already the slut, the loose one, the messy one, and nothing you could say or do would change that judgment call.

So it had been a surprise when you had met Namjoon’s eyes last week and seen no judgment there.

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