what-i-can-do

anonymous asked:

Not really a fuck anyone, more of an advice question. I started at the bullseye seasonally. My co-worker said they sometimes keep seasonals permanently depending on the turnover rate after holidays. This is probably the best job I've ever had with great pay. However, there's also a lot of other seasonal workers. Any advice on what I can do to stand out from the crowd as to keep my position after the holidays?

Thanks, guys!

I’ve gotten a lot of encouraging words about my work on the midseason as well as a lot of Tangled/ storyboarding-related questions! 

I can’t guarantee that I can answer all the Tangled-related questions, but over my upcoming break I’ll probably do a livestream to talk about what I can + do some kind of drawing/ storyboarding demo! 

I’ll keep everyone posted on when that goes down! Thanks for your support!!!

latimes.com
Henry Cavill...on Superman and JUSTICE LEAGUE
[*Some SPOILERS*]
By Emily Zemler

“I think — and I imagine Superman would also think — the greatest quality of people and humankind is their capacity to love regardless of hardship or difficulties or personal trials. People can be living in the most horrendous war zone or under the most incredible oppression and yet they can still love so selflessly and so unconditionally — and still bear hope through that love. It’s amazing to see what people can do. I think Superman would recognize that and appreciate it.”

…There’s no word on another Superman film, or even the previously announced “Justice League” sequel. Cavill sees a future movie as a way to correct some of the missteps in previous incarnations. He also notes that he is contracted for another picture in the franchise and feels hopeful for Superman’s future.

“There’s a wonderful opportunity to tell the Superman story,” he says. “Now there is a fantastic chance to show Superman in his full colors and tell a very complex, character-driven movie that is based on story and have that wonderful sensation of hope and happiness. A feel-good movie with lessons laced in there as well.”

anonymous asked:

imagine being toms co-star in a movie and at one point y'all have to shoot a very intimate sex scene and the director keeps telling cut because y'all can't stop moaning/whimpering when it wasn't in the script. then on a break you go into your dressing room and Tom comes in and you continue doing what you were doing

i can’t handle y’all, yOU PUT ME THROUGH TOO MUCH IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE

steamy sunday

anonymous asked:

I'm a transguy and was wondering if you have any tips for getting rid of dysphoria and be more male-passing? My current situation doesn't allow me to be on hormone therapy or have top surgery. I have shot hair and my wardrobe is free of skirts and the like. What else can I do?

- wearing more masculine clothes such as dress shirts, flannel, graphic tees, hoodies, sweaters, etc.

- wearing darker clothes and layering your clothes can help to hide your chest.

- wearing more manly scents such as using men’s shampoo, soap, or cologne.

- packing (if you can’t get a packer then a pair of socks can really work wonders).

- if you can get a (safe) binder.

- wear more neutral tones such as browns, greens, blues, greys, and blacks.

- come out to people around you if you know that it is safe to do so and that they will not out you. Once you do this you can ask them to use your pronouns which can lessen your dysphoria. 

Coffee Break (drabble?)

I did a thing. A SFW thing. What? I can do SFW. Watch me. Is this a drabble? I think it’s too long for a drabble. I need sleep. 

Originally posted by ohmylorde90

*Disclaimer-I am not actually high because drugs are bad. Bad and illegal. Don’t do drugs, kids*

Coffee Break *drabble?*

PromptoXReader
Word Count: Too lazy to count because I just wrote this in an hour
SFW


The smell of coffee is a wonderful thing, both soothing to the body and soul and misleading in the bitter taste of the actual liquid once brewed. But something you had discovered after working in a small cafe was that after working there for three years, you eventually get sick of the smell.

Well, on certain days, at least. And it figured this was one of those days as you pumped cup after cup of pumpkin flavoring for the festive new fall season, the headache from the scent of coffee making the space behind your eyes hurt. You were going 110 miles an hour, trying to fill orders and trying to ignore how disgracefully exhausted and unattractive you looked in the windows.

It figured this was the one day when Prompto would decide to sporadically visit you, as most best friends did, with Iris in tow.

Iris spotted you immediately and began waving enthusiastically, probably trying to get you to jump on the cash register so you could give her the employee discount on her new found addiction to the pumpkin spice latte-you actually didn’t know Iris that well, you only knew of her through Prompto and Gladio and you only met them from a chance encounter at your cafe.

It had been ‘glow in the dark’ night, to promote a few new blends for the summer and you had been at the front door, passing out glow stick after glow stick to preppy college kids who barely glanced at you. Prompto came up to ask for one, seeming pretty excited for the rare event that his friend Ignis had dragged him to. You had run out though, the last box of the night now empty as he and his group approached-normally, you would have put on your cold ‘sorry, pal, it is what it is so get over it’ face that you showed to customers. But the way Prompto’s face fell when he saw you were out-the whole group seemed bummed, but understanding, yet Prompto was the most upset. He didn’t look like he was about to cry or anything, he just looked so unbelievably disappointed that it just broke your heart into tiny pieces. Like a puppy who got his food taken away-it was heart wrenching.

Which was probably why you got permission from your boss to go to the store around the block and buy a few more boxes of glow sticks. You passed them out to a few people as they all stood around awkwardly while EDM songs blared from the speakers (your boss hadn’t really thought this night through), but you managed to find Prompto and hand him a few glow sticks…

It was when his face lit up, the way he enthusiastically thanked you while stammering nervously that you knew you were in trouble.

Ever since then, Prompto had visited the cafe every other week-soon, you two were chatting away about this and that and the next thing you knew, you were practically inseparable on most days. And everyday you spent with him, you knew you were falling deeper and deeper in the rabbit hole of doom. Brief little images of a future with him, having cute dinner dates, going to the movies and such would flood through your mind and you would think about telling Prompto how you felt.

But then…then you thought of the inevitability of Prompto rejecting you. You had seen the way Prompto’s eyes wandered, for the big chesty girls with full lips and skimpy clothes-you were a lot of things, but you were not Prompto’s type; you had learned to accept that a few months after knowing him. If you did confess, not only would you be humiliated and heartbroken, but you would also lose your best friend.

How could anyone risk something like that?

Iris yelled your name across the busy cafe to try and get you to jump on the register-luckily for Iris, the current cashier went on break so you were able to jump on and take her order.

“Hey,” Prompto immediately greeted you with an offered fist tap and you blearily accepted said fist tap. “You look exhausted-rough day?”

You gestured around the busy cafe while blowing a piece of your slightly oily hair out of your face. “Is it that obvious?”

“When’s your break? We can go get some juice or something,” Prompto offered a sweet smile that made your heart melt a little, despite the exhaustion still eating away at you. Prompto was always doing that, finding ways to make your heart melt as he would make little kind gestures at you. it was just too bad that you would always have to snap yourself back to Eos before you got carried away.

“Soon as Katerina gets back,” You said, referring to the previous cashier who had just gone on her break. “And I think I want something stronger than juice,”

“Isn’t it a little early to drink?”

“Isn’t it a little early to nag?” You retorted, but shook your head with an exhausted smile. “I’m kidding. What do you guys want?”

“Same as always,” Iris said. “Gimme that pumpkin spice,”

“Gag,” Over dramatic gagging wasn’t a way to entice customers, but Prompto wasn’t looking to entice customers, so you had to guess it evened out in a way. What was your boss going to do, fire you for the show your best friend was putting on for you?

“Shut up before you make the whole cafe start vomiting or lose their appetites or something,” You reached over the counter to slug Prompto softly when a soft familiar ring tone reached your ears. “You got a phone call,”

“Probably Gladio wanting to tell me to not get Iris anymore coffee,” Prompto rolled his eyes at the big brother bear before patting Iris on the shoulder. “I’ll go run interference with him, order for me?”

“One pumpkin spice latte for him,” Iris immediately responded.

“Don’t you dare,” A dark look crossed Prompto’s face as he approached you with pleading eyes. “Don’t let her poison me,”

“I can make no such promise,” You punched in the usual for the two as you realized a few customers behind Iris were getting impatient. “Go take your phone call-I’ve got customers,”

“Fine, fine,” Prompto’s cute little pink tongue poked out at you before he left and you tossed a foam cup at him in retaliation.

“Sooooo,” Dark brown eyes residing in a little fifteen year old sparkled behind the counter, despite you trying to ignore her so you could take more orders. Here we go… “When are you gonna tell him?”

“Your total is thirteen fifty-two,” Beeping of the cash register filled the air, you punching more buttons to accept the customer’s form of payment and giving you a reason to try and ignore the annoying gossip thirsty girl. “What are you talking about?”

“Oh, come on, already,” Those same eyes rolled in irritation at your response. “You guys are so in love with each other, you are just refusing to show it. Why?”

“We’re not in love with each other, Iris,” You punched more numbers in the cash register for the next customer, wishing that you were anywhere but here with the little Amicitia brat. “Get real,”

“You know the only thing that makes you guys different from other couples? The other couples are having sex and you two are not,”

Iris,” Your eyes shot to the customer in front of you, but luckily he had earphones in and didn’t seem to be paying attention. Whew. “You’re too young to know what sex is,”

“ARGH,” Iris ran her hands through her hair and only looked to calm down when her order was called so she could reach her arm over the counter to grab the steaming cup. “I’m fifteen, okay? I’m not ten. Do you wanna know how many kids in my school are having sex?”

“Yeah and one of those kids better not be you,” You pushed Prompto’s cup to the side and accepted the earphone customer’s payment. “Gladio would kill you,”

“Don’t worry, he’s too busy threatening to kill all of the other boys who even share a remote interest in me,” Iris’ eyebrows bent in frustration but immediately smoothed when she drank her cup. “Damn, that’s good shit,”

“Don’t let Prompto hear you talk like that or he’ll tell Gladio,” Iris was so young and impulsive, it was hard not to scold her like a parent to a child.

“He wouldn’t dare or I’d threaten to tell you about how he has a crush on you,”

You tried to resist, but your heart was fluttering in your chest like crazy, the thought of such an amazing possibility was apparently too much for the poor muscle to bear and that got you pissed off. Iris didn’t know it, but she was getting your hopes up and you snapped without thinking. “Hardy har har,” You finally managed to get the last customer of the insane after school rush and massaged the back of your neck with one of your hands. “We’re best friends, okay? I don’t want to risk that so I’m not going to tell him how I feel so will you please just drop it?”

“What do you feel?”

Horror filled you down to the fingertips when you heard Prompto’s confused voice, causing you to stop breathing and stare at Iris in anger and fear. Of course-of course, he came back at that very moment. And judging by the sneaky sly and satisfied look from Iris, he had been standing there for a bit to try and get you to reveal something.

“I think you should take your break,” Your rage at Iris never ceased as she took another sip from her cup and skipped away. “You two have a lot to talk about,”


  You were gonna kill Iris.

Every footstep you took on the small park bridge with Prompto was fueled with that one thought. Step. Step. Step. I’m gonna kill Iris. I’m gonna kill Iris. I’m gonna kill Iris.

“So…” Prompto tried for what was maybe the fourth or fifth time to break the silence, yet once again you ignored him. In fact, you refused to look anywhere near him, not even at his shoes.

Saying your name softly, Prompto stopped to put his elbows on the railing thoughtfully and you did the same a few feet from him, still refusing to glance in his direction. Yup, you were gonna kill Iris.

Your teeth naturally sucked your bottom lip in and you bit hard down to try and figure out how to not fuck this up-how to keep your friendship somewhat still the same. Prompto was your best friend…you couldn’t lie to him, he always saw right through to you. Lying was pointless, but maybe if you didn’t make such a big deal about it, Prompto wouldn’t either. Yeah, that was a good strategy…right?

“Well…I mean…of course I do,” You admitted, turning your head away to hide your blushing face. Act casual…act casual… “I mean…you’re attractive. You’re fun to hang around. And you’re not an asshole. Of course I like you…in that way, I mean,”

A heartbeat passed-two, then three. When Prompto didn’t say anything, you figured it would be best to fill the awkward silence. “But look, it’s not a big deal, okay? I already know nothing can come of it, that’s why I never said anything. Because…well, I knew it was pointless. We’re best friends and you like a certain…type of person. Which isn’t a bad thing, I didn’t mean to imply that-I mean to say that I…”

You were rambling at this point, hoping to the Gods that Prompto would stop you, but you were only met with silence. You couldn’t stand the awkward silence. “I meant to say that-well, nothing has to get awkward between us or anything because…because we’re best friends and that doesn’t have to change or anything. I swear after this, you’ll never hear me talk about it again,”

Nothing. Finally daring to glance at him, you discovered Prompto wasn’t staring at you-he was looking down at his hands intently, his expression deep in thought. You glanced away and let it go like that for about five minutes before you started to go crazy and you had to talk again.

“So…are you gonna say something or just sit there and listen to me babble like an idiot?”

Nothing…still nothing. You couldn’t find the courage to glance at him again and felt fear at the inevitable-you were about to lose your best friend. All those months of keeping your mouth shut and shoving your feelings down. Gods damn Iris, you were gonna kill that little brat.

“Say something, Prompt,” You whispered softly, trying to ignore the tears stinging your eyes and the bile rising in your throat. “Please,”

Nothing…still nothing. Fed up, you decided you had enough.

“I get it,” You choke out your words and cough to try and clear your throat. “I won’t bother you ever again,” You stuck your fists in your eyes to wipe the tears and walked away from the silent Prompto, being too much of a coward to look at him.

Your best friend…gone because you couldn’t control your stupid fucking feelings.

You. were. gonna. kill. Iris.

Anger helped you keep walking, your vision focused on how you were gonna tell Iris to go shove her bratty little self into a corner and atone for her sins. You knew Iris was just a teenager and was just trying to help, but were pissed at the fact that she caused you to lose your best friend. Pissed that she was so gods damn nosy and so…just such a brat. She was a brat. An annoying little-

A hand grabbed harshly at your arm and pulled you back-your mind briefly flashed to how maybe you were about to be assaulted or mugged or something before you were turned around and suddenly were looking at a face full of freckles-a familiar face that you found yourself thinking of even when you shouldn’t.

A face that was…kissing you.

Prompto…Prompto was kissing you….

Prompto Argentum was kissing you.

Did…did you fall and hit your head?

Prompto pulled away, his chest rising and falling harshly as he stared at you with an intensity that was making you…holy shit, were you quivering? You were quivering. Who quivers anymore?

“Would you just give a man a chance to process something before you run off?” Prompto asked harshly before planting his lips on you once again.

Okay…you might let Iris live.

Barely.

anonymous asked:

Hey, Donnie, I need some advice. I've been looking for a job for the last two months and I've hit rock bottom. I don't know what to do. I don't think anyone is looking for someone to hire right now. I'm staying at my grandparents house for while, but nothing's come for me so far. What can I do? Should I just wait for someone to call for a job opening or should I just keep looking?

Have you tried your own job?

Maybe you can babysit? Walk dogs? Drive an uber? Offer to do errands for people? Mow people’s yards? House sit? There are small opportunities that you can do. 

anonymous asked:

Dating Embry Call please :)

Dating Embry Call would include:

  • Being his imprint
  • Not having any drama in your relationship
  • (because he does everything he can to make sure you’re happy)
  • The pack being your second family
  • You being protective over him because he’s a pure little angel
  • (everywhere except in the bedroom)
  • Lots of pet names
  • His parentage being a touchy subject
  • Him hating when you cry
  • (”What can I do to make it better?”)
  • Making him tell you the tribal legends over and over again
  • (which he doesn’t mind because he’s proud to share his heritage)
  • Having dates on the beach
  • Reassuring his mother when she gets worried about him
  • (which he appreciates more than words can describe because their relationship has been rocky since his transformation)
  • Always being together, day and night
  • Him always reminding you how grateful he is to have you
  • (and you feeling terrible because you remember how lonely he was before he imprinted)
  • Tickle wars
  • Play wrestling/fighting
  • (which more often than not leads to other physical activities)
  • You making sure his schoolwork is done
  • (”But baaabe”)

anonymous asked:

What does it mean "Adoptable"?? What can I do with it?

you get to claim the OC as your own! meaning you buy the design from me and you get to do whatever ya want with it- put it in a series, use it as your sona, make animation memes of smth- it all yours, bby

this is 100% true, im not lying this really happened some minutes ago, trust me,…yoongi called me to tell me that every person that ships the members and him with each other, are cancelled,,,then he got intense and say ‘u know what??? every person who ships irl people is cancelled’ and i just went ’:O’ but what can i do?:/ sorry guys you all dont exist anymore :/,,,

…….after being in a rut on how to recut this episode of SEEDS for WEEKS……..ive finally got it….. i know what 2 do i can see it clearly in my head 

anonymous asked:

Hey! Can I request some Pro heroes goodness? Aizawa, Mic and Toshi. I would like to see some domestic headcanons, like what do they prefer to do around the house and what they hate, how are they as parents, etc. Hope this makes sense hahahaha XD great blog sweetie <3 keep up the lovely work!

Ah, ok, I’ll see what I can do…

Aizawa:

This pro hero is surprisingly a pretty hardworking husband/boyfriend. He generally tries to help out around the house as much as he can, unless it’s washing the dishes, he doesn’t like having to touch old food on dishes and things. However, if it’s really needed, he might use some of his spare bandages to cover his hands with or just use lots and lots of rags to do the job. This is why he normally prefers takeout, unless it’s his s/o’s cooking! His favorite thing to do around the house other than chilling in his sleeping bag on the couch is probably doing laundry. It’s fairly stationary and he gets to hold all the warm towels and clothes so he’s happy just sitting in front of the TV and folding laundry.

Regarding parenthood, he might feel a little out of place when handling his baby, more relying on his S/O to do most of the parenting, and really only handling late night shifts. But he likes to put his child to sleep, singing really softly to them and that sort of thing. As his kid gets older, he’ll also like reading them stories! He(or his s/o!)never really thought of himself as a storytelling type of guy but he really likes that little part of his day. 

Mic:

This hero is also a very active boyfriend/husband, and is very helpful if you have spacious floors. He will blast music around the house and clean! His favorite is vacuuming, because it’s like dancing in its own way, right? Just don’t put on slow music, or things will start getting done a lot slower. His least favorite thing to do is take out the trash, because he’s got to leave the house, lugging that huge bag of yuck out to the street and it’s just really gross for him! But if he must, he does it, but he straps a bunch of those little car refresher trees to his belt, sprays down the whole bag with febreze, and brings the really nice smelling hand sanitizer with him, even if it’s only 5 feet to the curb.

With his kid, they better get ready because Mic will be holding them and trying to get them to speak as soon as possible, always speaking in third person. Daddy this and Daddy that for the whole time until they say their first word. If their first is mama, he’ll be a little devastated but be really happy! After all, his freaking kid just spoke! How could he be upset over that? After his kid is around toddler years, he will definitely invest in music lessons. He wants his kid to know how to do something, ANYTHING with music. If his kid ends up being a chatterbox, he will be SO happy, like they will just start talking and going on and on that they end up having really long and often really enthusiastic conversations. His S/O will have to be really tolerant and a good-listener when this happens.

Toshi:

Toshi isn’t at home a lot, having to stay The Symbol of Peace for the public, so he doesn’t really like having to do chores and things around the house, being the tired man he is. But occasionally, if work is slow, he finds reorganizing calming and almost theraputic. Like reorganizing his or his s/o’s desk is nice because he can rest a little and still get stuff done. He really doesn’t like taking out the trash like Mic because he has to blow up to his hero form to go outside and it’s pretty taxing on him after the whole Nomu incident. Like cut this man some slack please!

Toshi will be the most laidback parent. Like, oh yeah the baby climbed out of their crib? Maybe their quirk manifested really really early? The baby is wailing their head off? Have you tried turning it on and off? No, not like that, but he won’t stress about them too much, like Aizawa, he’ll entrust his s/o with more of the parenting. But he likes playing with his kid, either with dolls or with stuffed animals, he likes spending off-days with his S/O and their kid, just hanging out and playing with them. Now when they get older, he’ll get a kick out of taking them to school and embarrassing them a little in his suit and hero form. No kids better pick on his child, or the bullies may not exactly be attending the same school for much longer. With his ties to the school system, from being a teacher and a famed hero, he can surely pull some strings.

Hope this works!!

-Mod C

1.

Adam pressed a kiss to my cheek “I will see you soon, hopefully you can come to me” smiling at him “I will see what I can do because of the album I am kind of stuck here, see you soon” waving him off, he has been like hell so I am glad he is going. We need a little break away, away from each other. I saw Chris just once which was two weeks ago and he didn’t let it go, he knows everything about Chris but wants to be all in secure. The door closed “it’s been awful here!” Mel spat aloud “spill the details” Jen chimed in “Chris Brown add Adam equals?” Mel pointed at Jen “we all know Rihanna so spit it out” Mel said because Jen is taking her time, they are so annoying, I am not that bad “Rihanna fake hiding away from him and giggling?” I scoffed aloud “I hate y’all, it was nothing. He was there and I was laughing because he is stupid. Come on it is Chris, he just has that face” I said defending myself, nobody else will defend me “oh, right. Maybe should have kept your ass in London, he knows you both can’t keep away from each other. But you have a man now” eyeballing Mel “see, Jen knows. I have a man, I have been with him for a year so shut up!” Mel waved me off “that is why you won’t go to the studio now” I hate this bitch so much “if I was Adam I wouldn’t have left cheater over there” grabbing the pillow and throwing it at Mel, I am done with her mouth.

It’s all stupid talk, it’s been what, going on four years. I am over and done with that, we tried and it failed but I won’t go back there “I am sorry, are you mad at me still?” staring at the TV ignoring Mel, she is not helpful and never has been “oh come on, she is only mad because I am right Jen. We all know the situation, why is she acting like this with me. I just feel if you cannot handle your feelings then maybe you should have gone with Adam, saves you from cheating” my mouth fell open turning my head to Mel “first of all I was never going to cheat, second of all Chris can’t keep his dick in his pants. He has had hundreds of women so I do not want that. Even when we got back together he was cheating so I am done, thanks. Stop bringing up old wounds, bitch” getting up from the couch “you only sensitive because you felt a certain way” people assume shit, they assume because I see Chris I am going to jump into his pants. I am hurt by him, he is my first love so of course I will still have feelings when I see him, that is it.

I feel so in my feelings, I feel attacked. The team was all there and saw it, that is not my fault when we are together it happens, it’s a connection. Holding my bed covers close to me “you really got back in bed, so are we going to Diddy’s all white party? Jay is asking” I am glad Jen came to speak to me and not Mel “which Jay?” I mumbled “Brown, I mean Jay Brown” rolling my eyes “Robz, why are you upset? Mel is only concerned and is saying the truth because we all see it, when you come to LA you knew this would happen” flicking the tear away “well, you are also making jokes by saying Brown, I mean Jay Brown. Shit is never funny, not to me. You right, I was supposed to be Brown right now, I was supposed to me married, shit happens. I don’t need my team acting out, I don’t need the jokes when you all know my feelings. I have had it with him and then you, and her. I call my mom, I heard this happened. Just drop it, I will get over this and I will be down. Yes I am going” they think it’s all some joke, it’s never been a joke because they are not me, I am living in this. I am living this, I am with a man that treats me well but don’t love, and never will.

Yusef and I stared at the two dresses, I narrowed it down to two but I loved them all “I want you to go to that party and have all eyes on you, or you can mingle with the rest. Up to you but personally, I want you to take over that party” mingle with the rest or take over the party, I am Robyn Rihanna Fenty so I will take over that party “you know me, man’s out of town so let’s party” clicking my fingers getting up “yes bitch, that is how I like it! You know all those men are going to be drooling over you” looking behind me laughing “I would step on their necks with my heels and they will love it, let’s get to work” Mel has been so quiet, sat in the corner not saying a word. Grabbing two Corona bottles, she is my friend and she knows me. She is being harsh on me but I can’t at times take that, she is my bitch and I want to make it up with her. Walking towards the couch behind her, placing the bottle in front of her face “you better get ready, we have a party to go too bitch” Mel smiled taking the bottle “you know I love you Robz” smiling at her “I knew that” shimmying away.

“You know we are like two hours late” Yusef added “the fact we started early and we are still late” I shrugged continuing to dance “we be fucking around too much” Jen said, she right “Rich is here bitches!” Mel announced, rolling my blunt up “welcome to the party, I am done. Just finishing the blunt off” I need it for my journey there “fine by me” Rich sat down “stand up hoe, show us the full length” getting up from the couch “Stella McCartney bitch” I twirled “ooohhhh you look so good, your back is glistening. If only I didn’t like dick” Jen said, she always says this “mhmmm if I don’t get married then I will come to you” I will hold her to that, placing the blunt in my bag. I am going braless tonight, fixing the diamond necklace around my neck. I love the white crop top and then the flowing gown at the bottom, I am showing my stomach and back but like Yusef said, I want to be the life of the party and that is me.

Taking the blunt back from Mel “you actually rolled a good ass blunt bitch, I am so proud of you” Mel is funny, she knows I roll good ass blunts “whatever, hater hoe. I may need another one but I will roll one when I get inside” looking down at my phone seeing Adam calling me, how about I ignore this because he has been stank with me the whole time so fuck him “look at me” Mel spat, blowing the smoke out from my lips looking at Mel “least warn me that you are taking pictures, I wasn’t ready” she turned the phone to me “that flash near blinding me, I look good though” looking ahead of us at the traffic “why ain’t this shit moving, is this to the party or something else?” I asked, we been in this since forever “an accident up ahead” rolling my eyes, of course there is.

Reaching the party, finally we are here “looks like other people are late too, we good” the driver stopped right outside the white carpet “he really gone with this white theme, here Jen” passing my bag to Jen, I don’t want to be carrying that around. Rich opened the door for me, he has made this like it’s an award show with the carpet and photographers “we think a like being late” hearing Pharrell say as I got out of the car “oh my gosh, how are you” hugging him “good, I was thinking I am sure this is Rihanna and it is. Let’s walk the carpet together” I guess there is going to be a lot of celebrities in this thing.

Diddy pointed at me “you came! You didn’t say anything or reply but you came. You look so good, don’t she” waving off Diddy “shut up, I look ok. Cassie you look so beautiful” hugging her “thank you but not as good as you, you really did well. Who made it?” she looked me up and down “Stella McCartney” Cassie gasped “this is so beautiful, so glad you came. We weren’t sure in keeping your corner open but you got it, you can go and do your thing with your crew. Thank you for keeping with the code” smiling at her “thank you” seeing Diddy son Justin “don’t be trying your player game with me, licking your lips at me boy” pointing at him, he done tried that last time “you can’t hate him for trying Rihanna” his dad said, shaking my head hugging him.

I am pretty impressed with the party, even though there is everyone from the industry here and I am done with fake smiling “you see the way Cassie grabbed onto her man though like calm down girl, you only like light skinned men” Mel said in my ear, rolling my eyes “a lot of the women did that today but I am not interested, I have a man” speaking of him, let me reply to his text asking me where I am, he is probably having a fit that I am taking my sweet time.

To: Adam

From: Rihanna

At Diddys party speak soon

Pressing send getting up from the couch “getting a drink” I can’t be bothered to be even waiting for the service, I want my drink now, not later “you want anything” I pointed at my team shouting “no” they shook their heads.

Walking by people, I don’t want to say hi anymore because I am done, I just want to drink and be in my own zone “Rihanna” Rich tapped my shoulder, looking behind me. Looking to where he is pointing “Jay” smiling at him “you actually came to party in LA” hugging Jay Z “well it’s diddy’s party so why not” moving back from the hug “how is Bey?” I shouted over the music “she is ok, in New York” Jay Brown came from behind Jay Z “not you” pointing at him “what did I do now?” He laughed hugging me “what don’t you do, I text you saying when shall I do studio time and you ignored me” hitting his shoulder “you told me you weren’t well and then I pretty much forgot sorry” I said side eyeing him “I am getting a drink, want anything?” they both held their drinks up “talk after” this is me trying to not talk anymore, I just want to be left alone.

Maybe this dress wasn’t a good idea, I have to hold the bottom. I near tripped on myself, looking down at myself holding the gown up a little. That is so much better, thank god. Feeling someone hit into me as I looked up, feeling myself lose balance of life “woah!” the person said, feeling a hand on my back as this person bought me back onto my feet, that hand, the touch alone I knew that touch and my body tingled. Every hair on my body stood up “sorry, Rihanna. What are you doing here?” Chris said, a rush of people came by and it was like I blinked and he was gone “Are you ok?” Rich asked me, a little too late “I need that drink now, just get me there” I don’t even want to look around me, I just have a feeling what is happening, the stares.

I bought myself as many drinks as I could hold, shots, beer, Vodka bottle. Sitting down next to Mel, making myself comfortable again. I don’t even want to look at them, I also know what they are staring at “just say it” I said grabbing the shot “well that was awkward, we saw that coming Robz. We was like oh no, look up Rihanna but you was busy looking down, Chris just came at you and we all gasped” throwing back the shot “it was like a love story” Jen added, placing the glass down “thanks for saving me bitches, thank you” he is here, just what I needed “anyways, anything else happened besides what happened to me?” can we speak on something else besides me “uh no, just watching the car crash happen” of course they was.

Stood up so I could see the stage from here, Diddy is thanking everyone for coming “is this coming to us?” Jen shouted, seeing the sparklers and a bottle of champagne being held. The guy placed the bottle down on our table “who sent this?” I asked, the guy pointed at the other side of the place. Seeing Chris hold up a glass at me, turning my head not saying a word more “free champagne, we don’t care” now he knows where I am so he can stare at me all he wants “I just want to say thank you so much for coming out to the party so let’s turn up!” Diddy shouted, clapping my hands cheering. The beat dropped for Hypnotize “this my song” bopping my head.

Mel hit my arm “just act cool” she said to me, what is she even on about “I need a refill” looking up at Chris “wrong table” I retorted “is it? Why are you blowing me off? Friends can drink together, who cares? Who is looking?” looking behind Chris seeing a whole audience, he needs to look behind him “I think Chris has drunk more than us” Chris sat next to me “clearly, he has” I mumbled “fill the glass Mel” he really came here with his glass, he is awful “I think you need to go back to your friends, you’re drunk” looking to the side of me “I came to sit with a friend, don’t blow me off like you always do. Unless your man is here” we are too damn close for my liking “your glass Chris” Mel passed it to him “is everything ok here?” my manager asked, “why wouldn’t there be?” Chris was quick to say, I look pissed off but I am, not at Chris but just everything “everything is fine Jay” I don’t want no arguments, he is half drunk and I don’t want nothing to happen to him anyways.

Jay walked off, I am glad he did “you look beautiful tonight” it’s so hard, this is so hard that I can’t even look at him “thank you Chris, I think your people want you” looking at him, I made a mistake by looking at him. His eyes are hooded, a drunk Chris is always a pleasure but he does silly things “I think you want to get rid of me” his eyes glistening, the drink must be getting to me “how did you know? Then why won’t you go?” his leg brushing against my leg as he shifted next to me “you ditched me Rihanna, I didn’t ditch you. You made me go, you didn’t even let me explain. You know I want you and always did but you ran, you ran and now you are hanging in LA thinking I won’t question you about it” feeling Chris’ hand on my wrist “you wanted two lives, you didn’t want to settle. I did, you weren’t the Chris I fell for” he knows I was about to go “you cheated on me and didn’t stop” snatching my arm away “but clearly I am still the same guy and clearly you haven’t settled down, now what Rihanna?” Jen looked away as our eyes met “nothing, there is nothing. Look, you’re drunk and I am intoxicated, we will just end up arguing. Just leave it, leave it in the past. Friends ok? Let’s just leave it” I am done with it already.

Placing the glass down, Chris hasn’t moved away from me even though we are quiet. Shifting on the couch so I am facing Chris “how come you’re still sat here?” I don’t get it “because we don’t need to speak sometimes, we can just let the connection work. How are you going to say I wasn’t the same guy you fell for when you know I was, we got back together we was happy” nodding my head laughing “you right, I was Chris. Getting back the love of my life, yes I was. Thanks Chris. Thank you for fucking it up, it was you. I run away because it’s easier then facing you, like now. Why are doing this now? Fuck” he is so annoying “because I can’t fucking let you go, I see you and you’re mine. I fucking love you still, till this day. You blocked my number and you dogged me out too, I did cheat and I fucked it up. We ain’t settled and you know that, you haven’t either” getting up from the couch “see, you are running away again. Like you always do” he got up also facing me “I have a man, leave me” this is so hard for me “say it like you mean it Robyn, don’t give me Rihanna. Don’t speak to me Rich, I am going” maybe I shouldn’t have stayed in LA, Mel said I should have went.