what's the hell are they doing

Introducing my friend to Yuzuru Hanyu

Careful, long post incoming. I thought I might warn you :D

So, on thursday my friend was over and we spent a relaxed afternoon together on the couch. We started talking about her ex and then when on to my (non-existing) love life and I said to her: “Well, I have a problem. I have a stupid fan-crush on a japanese figure skater.” She looked at me for a millisecond and then said: “I think japanese men are handsome! And I used to love watching figure skating!” I was sooo excited when she told me! “Do you know Yuzuru Hanyu?” I asked her. She said no, and my hype-modus was actived! 
                                               “Hold on a sec!”
I grabbed my laptop and my brain was working so hard thinking about what the hell should I show her first?!?!?! 

I thought it would be good to show her Yuzuru off ice first. So I said: “Here, that is him.” 

Her. “Omg, he is cute!” Me:”And this is also him…”

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Better Late Than Never? Pt. 2 {TVD 8x14 Review}

Sorry this took so long guys! You know the drill, I write everything in real time so if I make a mistake at the beginning it probably will be rectified by the end but I already know what happens this epi, so, lol. This will contain anti-Damon, anti-Delena, anti-Bamon, anti-Steroline, anti-Bonenzo sentiments. There will most likely be mentions of other shows and of the misogynoir and anti-blackness and racism in this narrative. If you do not like it, do not read. OK, ready? Let’s go!

1. “If you want my forgiveness, you’re going to bring Elena Gilbert back to life” that line still makes me laugh because who the fuck cares about your hand-me-down forgiveness, Damon. Also Elena isn’t dead. So back to life my ass, it’s just waking her up.

2. I think it’s funny that Cade is talking about how Damon is in limbo, “the space between spaces” because my guy, that is JUST the Other Side.

3. No, see, the entire plot line with Cade and the Salvatores irritates me because it’s so conveniently linked to Damon and Stefan. He is the devil or the devil’s right hand man (since Katherine is the Queen of Hell for some reason, right?) I don’t understand why he can’t just find the weapon himself or get someone else to do it for him, there’s no reason that it has to be Damon and it’s the problem when a villain keeps making threats “Or I’ll drag you back to hell”, so then do it. At least with Supernatural when Zachariah wanted Dean to do something and Dean was like nah, Zachariah was like OK so what if I give Sam stage 4 stomach cancer? Or hey, how about if I take away his lungs? And we see him inflict these tortures on Sam while Dean watches. Or Dean starts off the season coming out of hell and we get flashbacks to what hell was like for him and we find out how much it fucked him up so when Uriel and Castiel threaten to throw him back into hell, it’s an actual real threat because we’ve seen the effects and why he would be scared. This whole thing with Damon is like … every time Cade says he’ll send Damon to hell I’m like motherfucker, no you’re not or you would’ve DONE did it by now, stop.

4. Kat and Paul look gorgeous together, like I just … seriously, they’re really beautiful people.

5. Bonnie being able to see Enzo is like Jeremy being able to see Bonnie and Elena hallucinating Damon. I’m bored.

6. Lol I’m sorry, that picture of Caroline and Stefan, their smiles are so tight.

7. I find it interesting that nearly every time Stefan is going to leave town or stays in town it’s because of Elena. He comes back to MF to meet Elena. In 1x09 he says he’s going to leave town to protect her but he stays because in 1x10 she says she loves him and because Logan Fell had just become a vampire. In 3x21 he tells Damon that if Elena chooses Damon he’ll leave town, he stays because Elena became a vampire and because she chose him. In 4x23 he’s going to leave town because Elena chose Damon. And now in 8x14 he’s going to leave town but Elena is in trouble so he stays. In 5x09 Katherine even made it a point to tell Stefan that he stays in MF for Elena.

8. Caroline, isn’t it a bit premature to tell your toddler children that you might not marry Stefan?

9. LOL I do find it a bit weird that Kai would be singing at karaoke but it’s made up for the fact that I could listen to Chris’ voice for hours and Paul’s facial expression as Stefan watches Kai sing is HILARIOUS. OMG.

10. I like seeing Paul and Chris interact, they work really well and really easily together although I don’t feel like I’m watching Stefan and Kai, I feel like I’m watching a visual representation of a Chris/Paul tweet conversation but it’s entertaining.

11. Hmm, the show is doing some pretty tight close ups on Kai and Stefan, they almost shoot them the way they shoot Klefan, I wonder if Klaus would be jealous.

12. I was literally like “why the fuck isn’t Damon coming to save his human brother from being stabbed” and then Stefan says, “What took you so long? and Damon says he went to put in a song. I get that’s supposed to be funny but seriously it just once again shows how fucking thoughtless Damon is, like you went to put in a song when your human brother was going to head to head with a psychopath heretic from hell? Fuck you, Damon.

13. Stefan didn’t actually say that he wants to figure out if he wants to be with Caroline, though, he legit said I need to figure out who I am and I need to do it alone. Like whatever, Caroline.

14. Also where are the twins if neither she nor Alaric are watching them in this scene? Like if they’re setting shit on fire because of temper tantrums and are literally prone to blowing each other up now, I would be around them all the time.

15. I do like how Kai is like hey, hey! Maybe you should stop talking about your love life and wonder wtf is happening with your kids? I mean I could help.

16. BE is basically DE.

17. I like how Stefan has, like, an actual plan to kill Cade but if you’re going to kill him, will you not slash his arm and punch him and make witty remarks, can you just stab him?

18. Because you see what happens, Alaric’s cell phone rings and he stops ringing the all important bell.

19. Really? Did they really make Stefan go, “DIE” as he’s trying to kill Cade? I wonder if Paul was like, do I really have to say this though? Can’t you give a line like that to Ian?

20. Oh so Damon killed himself to save Stefan and Elena. I mean I guess. He comes back to life anyway.

21. They’re making Kai really petty, like really, he’s this obsessed with killing two toddlers?

22. What does being psychic have to do with knowing Damon can hear him.

23. I can’t believe there’s a literal fight for Damon’s soul. OMG.

24. *SPOILERS FOR OUTLANDER* So there’s this show/book called Outlander about many things but at the centre of it, there’s a love story between Jamie and Claire and throughout the series, Jamie makes these declarations of love to Claire and says he’ll do anything for her, that he’ll be her shield, he’ll die for her etc. and there’s this villain called Jack Randall who is a sexual sadist and he has a particular interest in Jamie who he nearly flogged to death years earlier, basically Randall gets a hold of Claire and is going to kill her in front of Jamie so Jamie offers up his body to Randall in exchange for Claire’s safety and in that scene Randall nails Jamie’s hand to a table and kisses him while Claire has to watch and then Claire is forced to leave Randall and Jamie alone and in the next part we basically see the rape and torture that Randall inflicts on Jamie over and over. A lot of people had issues with that and asked the author why she felt the need to show the brutal rape of Jamie and her response was this:

“So, OK.  Throughout the book, we’ve seen that love has a real cost.  Jamie and Claire have built a relationship through honest struggle, a relationship that’s _worth_ what it’s cost them.  This is the final challenge, and Jamie’s willing to pay what will apparently be the ultimate cost.

   Why would I throw that away?  To have him escape rape and torture (he–and we–_know_ what’s coming) by the skin of his teeth would be to undercut his sacrifice, to make it of little moment.  (It would be like someone turning up in Gethsemane and telling Christ, “Hey, buddy, you don’t _really_ have to do this.  Come with me, I got a secret way outta here…”)”

And this is what TVD fails to do with DE. It’s one thing for Damon to be willing to go to hell for both Stefan and Elena but Bonnie shows up and actually saves him from having to undergo that threat and it undercuts his sacrifice because he didn’t actually have to sacrifice anything, he just had to be willing and it’s not impactful. So I’m not even a little moved by what Damon did because he didn’t do anything first of all, second of all after everything he’s done throughout 8 seasons why wouldn’t he choose himself, I mean, it’s the least he can do.

25. “Bonnie, wake up”, Stefan can you check her pulse?

26. “That little psychic blast must’ve blew me into my body” that literally makes no sense.

27. Damon and Stefan sitting on Damon’s car, drinking is basically just Sam and Dean. Stop it.

28. So Alaric wants to open a poor man’s Hogwarts/Charmed “Magic School” omg that is so lame and unoriginal. I also realize how lazy it was for Charmed to call that academy “Magic School”.

29. “Someone who can create a safe, supportive and loving space for kids … someone like you” is that Caroline, though? I’m sorry but she doesn’t seem like any of those  things to Josie and Lizzie, she’s shrill and just tells them to stop doing things, like I don’t know why she didn’t actually ask Josie and Lizzie how they felt when their magic was going haywire, like we don’t actually see her BE with them, she just scolds.

30. So I actually like the proposal scene with Steroline, I think what Stefan says to Caroline is sweet … I just don’t believe it. I just don’t believe that everything he wants is there with her, I just don’t believe that he loves her that deeply and Stefan doesn’t get here on his own and he never gets to the romantic speeches with Caroline on his own and it’s like … how do I explain this … when Stefan and Elena were going through their separations, even if they were both doing something else, I always got the impression that they were on each other’s minds, that there was a struggle to stay away from each other but they were doing so because they thought it was the right thing to do at the time. I never get that with Steroline when they’re apart, it just feels like their lives break off and there isn’t a residual connection there, it feels like they’re perfectly fine being separated and their lives are easily untethered so when Stefan comes back like MARRY ME, it doesn’t feel like he’s stopped fighting what he wants and it doesn’t feel like he’s wanted to do this all along and he’s finally just acting on it, it feels like Damon said, “life isn’t going to get any better than you marrying Caroline so marry her” and Stefan went “true.”

31. Also, every time Candice and Paul kiss it really feels like they’re trying to use as little lip as possible, like this was supposed to be a passionate, deep kiss, like it was supposed to be this:

also people underestimate how sweet Mattoline could be, like I frankly never see Caroline look at Stefan like this:

but anyway, their kisses always look like they want to do the least possible and not open their mouths:

anyway.

32. The Bonkai reunion was meh but someone told me the Grahamwood chemistry is gone and like, where? When Kai said “This is kinda hot” I believe he meant it.

and the personal satisfaction Bonnie gets from this:

she looks cheeky not like she has this vicious vengeance, like nah, the Grahamwood energy stays on point.

33. Finally, what anons kept asking me about, Katherine Pierce being the Queen of hell. I am going to admit something, I think the show and the characters gas Katherine way too much, she isn’t the baddest bitch of all, I don’t think the characters are toast because she’s running hell, I don’t even think she deserves to run Hell, she’s petty, it’s not like she has master plans that completely destroy lives, she just makes things inconvenient for the core group like *ugh* I mean I guess I gotta go fix Elena because she has venom in her system, like what were the major consequences of what she did in 5x15 to Elena? Elena didn’t see Damon for an entire episode and couldn’t sleep with him immediately. Getting Jenna to stab herself was rude but the major consequence of that is Stefan and Elena breaking up. She outted the Klaroline sex and it just fractured an already fractured relationship with Tyler. The worst thing she did was cause Jeremy’s death and that wasn’t even intentional, it was just like oh well … yeah, my bad, bye. Like she’s a mean girl on steroids, that’s kind of it, she isn’t like this Badass Villain that no one can top and OMG SHE RUNS HELL. I mean Rebekah caused just as much damage as Katherine did because they’re both petty.

Overall this episode was … one of the least offensive episodes of the season, I guess. No real strong feelings about it. Sorry it took so long to review, I hope it was worth the wait :)

quick drabble for the @rebelcaptainprompts theme “stardust” because my mind went here instead of something appropriately sentimental

“Change your password,” Cassian grouches, slumping into the seat opposite her in the U-Wing cockpit. Jyn doesn’t even look up from where she’s readying her blaster.

“Why?”

Cassian flicks the controls, slides his headphones on. “That thing gives you access to all our data files. It needs to be hard to guess.”

“Who says it’s not hard to guess?”

“Me. I guessed it.”

Jyn glares at him, though—and this may say something about their relationship—she doesn’t look all that surprised. “Are you serious? What the hell were you doing, trying to hack my account?”

Cassian shoves the headphones over his ears, turns to glare back at her. “Yes. If I can hack your account, anyone can hack your account.”

“Oh,” Jyn snarls, “so you were doing me a favor.”

“Yep.” Cassian sighs. “Jyn, your password can’t be stardust. It’s so transparent.”

“I added numbers.”

“Your birthday. That doesn’t help.”

Jyn props her feet up on the control panel, despite the fact that Cassian has told her not to do some fifty times now. He has to physically restrain himself from reaching over and swiping them off.

“I can remember it,” she shrugs.

Cassian groans. “That’s not the point.”

“It’s a lot of the point. Look, nobody’s going to guess it.”

“I guessed it!”

“Yeah, you.” She shrugs, frowning. “But you’re the only one on base who knows that name, so…”

This is enough of a surprise that Cassian has to glance over at her; that name—and all the weight associated with it—is so integral to the person she once was, to the person she’s become. It’s hard to imagine her without it.

Jyn’s looking studiously at the laces of her boots.

“Oh.” Cassian swallows. “Just me?”

The corner of her mouth twitches. “Yep.”

“Huh.” He pauses. He can read her well enough by now to know when not to press.

He clears his throat, switches tactics.

“You realize that means I can still hack your account though, right?”

“Yeah.” She waves a hand. “But it’s just you. What are you going to do?”

He huffs. “I could do plenty.”

“You already hacked my account. Did you do anything besides immediately log out and come yell at me to change my password?”

“No,” he glowers. “But next time, I might.”

She reaches over, and the way she pats his knee hovers somewhere between affectionate and condescending. She walks that line well.

“Sure,” she says. “Are we taking off any time soon, or what?”

Cassian rolls his eyes, shifts back to the control panel.

“Be patient,” he grumbles. “I’m working on it.”

When he glances back over at her, quick, he thinks he catches her smile.

Originally posted by fuckyeahleonardmccoy

Prompt: Kirk x pregnant!going into labor! Reader? 
Word Count: 842
Warnings: Childbirth. Seriously, almost everything about it.
Author’s Note: I’ve never had kids, so I went to the lovely @angryschnauzer and @star-trekkin-across-theuniverse for some help understanding what it’s like to actually have a kid. Thank you so much ladies!!!

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So one of the sims in an inactive household died- I mean he’s missing from the household entirely and he is a ghost in their family’s relationship panel. But there’s no urn? Anyone know what the hell I should do or if this is normal? ;-;

things i’ve gathered from working at Victoria’s Secret:

DISCLAIMER: this is solely based on my experience working at my store as a Generalist. this doesn’t apply to all VS stores; mgmt and how things are run will vary based on each individual store.

~~~~~~~~~~

- unless you start out as a Seller (someone who exclusively works on the floor), you will not recieve any formal training on how to do your job. (i.e. if you’re a Generalist, a person who does basically everything) you have to learn as you go along and bother other workers for what to do because you don’t know what the hell you’re doing.

- if you’re a Generalist, they will work you to the bone, make you clean up after everyone (esp. if you work shipment) and shit on you. they don’t really acknowledge all of the hard work they do nearly as much as Sellers. the only person who does is the district manager, who only visits maybe twice a month? 

- the company does not listen to their employees. they will bend over backwards for customers, letting them get their way for totally unfair situations, but not the people who have to deal with said ridiculous customers. if there’s an ongoing issue with a manager, who’s manipulative, a compulsive liar, and many other awful things, despite many many complaints to HQ, they will not do anything about it. if there’s any internal problem, they won’t blink an eye.

- VS is a very selfish company. they overprice everything, the don’t pay their workers not nearly enough with the amount of shit they deal with, they boast about an ‘awesome employee discount’ which is actually very specific with its requirements. generalists don’t get incentives, bonuses, or free clothing like Sellers do. it’s a very heirarchal system when it comes to employees. 

- they’re actually not very inclusive. there’s nothing in their training about gener identity and respecting trans people. there’s nothing educating their workers about trans people. many many times, a trans woman has been harrassed by a worker in my store, by a cis employee. this issue could’ve been avoided if there was something about it in the training. out of 50+ employees, my boyfriend and i are the only trans and lgbt+ people in the entire store. they really do go for the stereotypical white, cis, straight woman when looking to hire. 

- they’re very flawed and are very good at hiding it. their products aren’t worth the money, that’s something i can promise you. you can go to walmart and find something looking exactly the same and less than triple the price. they’re not worth your money. 

if you’re a VS employee or a past one, please feel free to add your experiences! i’ll be adding more as well.

remember that time in jane eyre where brocklehurst is interrogating ten year old jane and he’s all like ‘hell is a very bad place, what must you do to avoid going to hell?’

and jane just looks him straight in the eye and goes ‘i must not die’ 

anonymous asked:

How does a bastard, orphan, son of a whore  And a Scotsman, dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot in the Caribbean by providence impoverished, In squalor, grow up to be a hero and a scholar?

Edd: The ten-

Tord: *covers his mouth* I HAD ENOUGH OF THAT BLOODY MUSICAL ALREADY

Tom: Oh really? *smirks* 

Tord: Don’t you even DARE you bastard.

Tom: Oh I DARE-

Masky: You’ve got to press it on you~ You just think it~ That’s what you do, baby~ Hold it down, dare~

Tom: Was that Gorillaz?

Masky: Yup.

Tom: Cool.

Edd: *takes Tords hand away* THE TEN-DOLLAR FOUNDING FATHER WITHOUT A FATHER-

Tord: STOP IT

Tom: GOT A LOT FARTHER BY WORKING A LOT HARDER-

Tord: FUCKING HELL

anonymous asked:

hey, I live in a really abusive home and I wanted to know what I should do, like my Mom keeps saying she's going to kill me, and she wants me to kms. I have no friends anymore and I'm kind of considering it? Do you have any advice that could help, I mean all I have is tumblr everything else sucks, but i really love to watch you and i really like your blog too, but what should i do?

Definitely get away from her. Thats no way to treat a child. If U don’t want to go to the police for help there must be another family member or family friend you could ask to stay with? Whatever u do dont kill urself. Some parents can be terrible but once ur 18 u can get the hell out of there and u dont need to see or speak to them ever again. Im just worried that she will legit try to kill you someday. If u think she would do that and she’s not just trying to scare you u gotta get out of there

this gonna sound WICKED cheesy but like

i started to take to heart the idea that we are all related? we are all family. we’re like a body and a body can’t be healthy if like, there’s something cutting off circulation to a part of it (this analogy isn’t great sorry)

other people matter. even other people i don’t like, they matter. i’m not saying all lives matter or don’t punch nazis, i’m saying if you can’t bring yourself to do ANYTHING ELSE at least fucking find it within yourself not to ADD to the oppression that vulnerable, marginalised, and highly murderable people face. if nothing else do it out of selfishness, it’s not good for your heart or soul. try to fucking love people even if you think they look weird or unattractive. love them and let them matter to you like you matter to you. because their hurt should be your hurt, otherwise what the hell, go join richard spencer and i’ll fucking punch you too

Fox Demon Interview

(She makes me set up the room as if this were a job interview)

Are you often confused for a kitsune or gumiho?

No, the only people who would do that are humans and I dont work with humans. (Me: What about me?) We’re in business together. (What does that mean?) [What she says in reply is a bit private but basically our business is her teaching more about hell while I teach her more about humans,]

What area of hell is she from and what is it like?

It’s fox country *cackles*. A bunch of hungry beasts that prowl around eating even their own kind. It’s nice if you’re the one who can do all the eating. Those that are weak are usually cowering in fear all their lives. (How’d you get out?) Are you implying that i was one of the cowerers? (No, I was just-) Well I wasn’t, at least my family wasn’t. If you’ve got family connections, you’re golden. Nobody’s going to attack the son or daughter of a prince. (Were you rich?) Rich might be pushing it but we were well off enough to escape the mess. (How is this place structured?) Well you’ve got your rich mansions hanging around and then you got your slums where the predators go to feed. You gotta keep your doors secured there, I heard that you won’t get eaten if they cant get into your house.

Note: From what I know, her species has a “beast” form in addition to the humanoid one. The more “civilized” members rarely go into their beast form. Also “fox country” isn’t the actual name of the place. 

How old is she?

9999999999999999999999999999999999……

(We discuss how nine is a good number)

What does she eat?

An assortment of things, we’d often get food imported in from other areas. Lot’s of meats and delicacies. You know I’ve eaten human before. Not as tasty as one might expect. (My companion, B: “I’d disagree, it depends a lot on the human”). Well we didn’t have it that often so we didn’t get the chance to be choosy. It was a lot juicier than I expected. A bit sweet. It probably just needed more seasoning now that I think about it. (B: “Humans come with their own seasoning sometimes”) *They laugh*. (Me: Anything else?) Veggies! There’s this one veggie that is wonderful. Radishes, they are called. Do you have those? (Yeah, I like them) Oh, so good!

Are there any damned souls in her area of hell?

No, if there are they’d be eaten *cackles*

What is the gender roles like in her species?

Women…should not be in the workforce. *cackles* Obviously I don’t give a fuck about that. That’s one thing that i like about humans, you have so many working women. It’s nice to work, gives a sense of purpose. Though staying at home is good too. Sometimes I wish that I didn’t go into work because of the stress but then i remember how bored I’d be if I were sitting around a house folding clothes all day. (What kind of gender expectations are there?) Woman are there to take care of the children and that’s it. She can’t own a home, own a car (Cars???) yes cars, or even arrange her own marriage. (So how did you get out of all that?) I left. My job takes me to all sorts of places so I don’t have to go back there. And who knows? Maybe I’ll be running the place in a few years *cackles*

Ask her if she has any favorite foods/pastimes/what she does for fun?

I hunt rabbits. The little hell rabbits are good game. You can actually make a lot of money off of those if you find ones with good furs. (Do they taste good?) Oh yeah, of course. (What else?) I’m a business woman, there’s no time for much else. Though I do like food tasting. I like food.

What does she think of furries?

What are furries? (I explain furries and show her pictures of fox anthros) That one looks like my sister!!! (So what do you think of them?) I think this is cool!

What’s her culture like?

My culture is shit, I hope you got that idea already. We’re kind of a bunch of assholes. That’s really all it is: asshole culture.

What kind of business does she deal with?

I’m an agent. I connect people with potential partners so they can make good deals. I also own stock in some companies though those are outside of hell. One of them is a radish producing company!

Any experiences with crap customers?

Oh honey, I work with demons of all kinds. If you thought you knew crap customers let me tell you, you don’t know nothing until you work with an angry hellbeast. They’ll threaten you with death, with torture, and you just gotta sit there and be professional. Though if you ever intentionally screw them over, you’ll get what’s coming to you. They don’t mess around with business.

How does she deal with them?

I be polite, the good customer service agent. Of course in the back of my mind im cursing them out to hell and back if that’s an expression that you use. Also sometimes I have a…uh friend who’ll help me out with the really rowdy ones. Though usually once I show my “teeth” they’ll calm down before we need to go there.

Note: By teeth she means her beastly form

Are you queer?

(I explain what that means) I like men, though I wouldn’t say no to some human woman. I love their hair.

What do you find interesting in the human world?

How you all live so close to each other. I could barely live in the same house with my family much less a building like this with a bunch of strangers. (I live in a college residence hall). Also your food! I’ve never seen such weird and diverse things until I came here. Like fish? What is that??? I don’t know but it tastes good.

Which human characteristics do you find interesting/amusing? And why?

Your need for revenge. Like I understand revenge and why people do it and all that but I guess coming from a place where your best friend can be killed any minute it’s hard to see how people can keep mustering up energy to go against everyone that has wronged them. It would make for good business though, write that down!

You also seem a lot happy all the time, which is the total opposite of the first thing. It makes it hard to gauge where a human’s emotions and feelings are at. Are they mad? Are they happy? One minute they’re one thing and the next they’re something completely different. It’s hard to keep up. At least with demons they’re normally vocal with their feelings. Humans are….enigmatic.

What do you think about humans in general?

Enigmatic like I said. You seem like interesting creatures but you’re very hard to figure out. That’s why I haven’t done too much work with them. You have to know your client in order to be in successful business with them but if you don’t even understand your client’s species, how are you going to understand them personally? (So demons are just easier for you to work with?) Yes, considering that I am one and I’ve got them figured out, at least mostly. Humans are a whole other story.

Final Words?

Uh you better be supplying me with radishes now. I was, what was the word that you use, “lowkey”?, trying to tell you that i want them. (I meant for the readers) Oh! Uh, I don’t know…maybe eat more vegetables? That is a human thing right? Where not a lot of people eat vegetables? (Mostly for children) Oh, those things,…. but still vegetables are important!

It had been going so well. They almost seemed up to speed. This may have been what caused Ponder to act like the man who, having so far fallen a hundred feet without any harm, believes that the last few inches to the ground will be a mere formality.
“To use the classic metaphor, the important thing is not to kill your own grandfather,” he said, and smacked into the bedrock.
“What the hell would I want to do that for?” said Ridcully. “I quite liked the old boy.”
“No, of course, I mean accidentally,” said Ponder. “But in any case–”
“Really? Well, as you know, I accidentally kill people every day,” said Ridcully. “Anyway, I don’t see him around–”
“It’s just an illustration, sir. The problem is cause and effect, and the point is–”
“The point, Mister Stibbons, is that you suddenly seem to think everyone comes over all fratricidal when they go back in time. Now, if I’d met my grandfather I’d buy him a drink and tell him not to assume that snakes won’t bite if you shout at them in a loud voice, information which he might come to thank me for in later life.”
“Why?” said Ponder.
“Because he would have some later life,” said Ridcully.
“No, sir, no! That’d be worse than shooting him!”
“It would?”
“Yes, sir!”
“I think there may be one or two steps in your logic that I have failed to grasp, Mister Stibbons,” said the Archchancellor coldly. “I suppose you’re not intending to shoot your own grandfather, by any chance?”
“Of course not!” snapped Ponder. “I don’t even know what he looked like. He died before I was born.”
“Ah-hah!”

– on killing your own grandfather | Terry Pratchett, The Last Continent

anonymous asked:

A HC where Lilia is supposed to take care of Yurio, but she treats him like a toddler. Like her walking into Yurio's room, taking away his phone and saying "It's naptime", then walking out. Also her trying to spoon-feed him.

HAHA, could you imagine Yurio though? He would be so annoyed.
Lilia does look like the kind of person who would be useless with kids, basically treating anyone under eighteen like a really little kid.

Could you imagine salty little Yurio being told to take a nap? Or being spoon fed? He would be LIVID!

I can imagine him ranting about it to Otabek, going on and on: ‘what the hell is she doing, telling me to take a nap, I’m freaking fifteen, I flew to Japan on my own and won the goddam GPF and she treats me like a baby…“

I firmly believe that if you can’t handle your favorite fictional character being made fun of, you reeeeeeally need to go outside.  What the hell would you do if somebody poked fun at you?

Break down crying?  Sorry, fam, it happens every single day in reality.  Friends do it to each other.  Mean-spirited people will do it to you just for a reaction.

Sorry, but no.  I have zero pity for people who throw hissy fits about their “faves” being parodied.  “But that’s not how it’s supposed to be, it’s deeper than that!!”

So what, people can’t joke?  Get a grip.