I have had numerous novice Doms asking me how I organize, plan and execute a Sensual Domination session for a submissive. First of all, you need to know there is no wrong/right way to do this. It really comes down to you, your sub and what you want to achieve/experience through the session. There is a million ways to achieve your goals during a session so no two session need to be similar. It comes down to how creative you can be.
A Recipe for Mind-Blowing Domination Sessions
Listen To You Sub and Learn As A Dom:
Who owns this sexy body?
First and foremost, to be a good sensual Dom, listening attentively to what a sub says turns her on and observing very carefully to how her body reacts to specific acts, specific stimulation is key. Those are the “Hot Buttons” that you need to take note of , then push them at the moment you want to ramp things up to the next level during a session or to overwhelm her to push her over the edge. No two women are identical so tailoring a session to arouse her specific darkest desires and sexual triggers is the key to being a great Dom.
One of the most powerful things for a Dom to know is what specifically puts (psychological trigger) his sub into “submissive mode”. It varies greatly between women: your hand on her throat, pulling her head back by her hair, how you intensely stare at her in public, forced oral sex, spanking, your tone of voice, saying specific “hot button phrases” such as “Such a Good Girl” or “Who’s MY naughty girl/beautiful slut?”. All these are powerful psychological triggers that a Dom needs to understand how to use effectively with a specific sub.
Other examples of Submissive Triggers:
- And for another sub, it was our tradition of a long, sensual & passionate kiss to greet each other.
- For a another sub, it was my left hand sliding up her throat as I kissed my way up her neck then whispering in her ear what dirty plans I had for her that evening.
- And for another sub, it was me pulling her head back roughly by her hair.
- And for another sub, it was me growling “Who’s MY dirty little slut? or “My Good Girl”.
- And for another sub, it was placing the collar/leash on her neck or breathing on her neck or kissing the back of her neck.
- And for another sub, it was me praising her during oral sex by her full name.
- And for another sub, it was being bent over and spanked really hard without mercy.
- And for another sub, it was being forcefully bent over the edge of the bed taken roughly in the Doggie position without being asked or spoken to.
Examples of “Hot Button” words/phrase for Subs:
- Mine / My ______
- Toy / Pet / Naughty Girl / Kitten / Babygirl
- Good girl / Good slut / Good pet / little one
- Slut / Whore /Bitch / Cunt
- Cockwhore / Cumslut / Fucktoy
- “Who owns you?” / “Call me Sir”
- “Who’s my naughty girl?”
- “Whose pussy is this?” / “This pussy’s mine”
- “Suck my cock like a slut!” / “Take that cock!” / “Take it now!”
- “Cum for Me now!” / “Cum for Me kitten”
- “You can’t come until I tell you” (whispered)
- “I’m gonna fuck the hell out of you” (whispered)
- “Good girl, take this cock” (whispered)
- “Do you like my cock in you” (whispered)
- “My baby girl’s pussy is so good”
- “My slutty little girl”
- “My pretty bitch”
- “You’re my precious little whore”
- “You’re my beautiful slut”
- “You’re my lovely cunt”
- “Which hole shall I abuse first? Hmmm…”
- It is important to recognize that the emotional connection of the sub to the person saying the words is much more important than the words themselves. The words only have power because of who is saying them, their voice and the specific characteristic of their speech (tone, pace, accent, emphasis, etc.). The sub’s emotional connection gives the person’s words this power. The same words spoken by another person may be insulting or offensive.
- These “Hot Button” words are unique to each sub’s mind. Specific words/phrases have power for that specific sub. Learning what specific words carry power for a sub is like understanding how to arouse the body of a woman. It is specific and unique just to her.
- Some women also find there are some words/phrases that resonate strongly when spoken (“Call me Sir” or “You are such a Good Girl”) and others that resonate strongest whispered (“You can’t cum until I give you permission”).
I recently had a very interesting discussion with a highly sexual woman who can cum during cybersex. Some of her “Hot Button” words were “Mine” and “Good Girl”. They are both interesting and significant because they both express her deep need to be possessed and praised by the one who possesses her.
As a Dom, I get very aroused saying the phrase “Who is My dirty little slut?” or “Don’t you dare cum without permission!’ I love expressing ownership and control over my sub. In addition, “slut” or “whore” are two key “hot button” words for my libido. My libido goes wild because they are such taboo & context-sensitive words for most women. I would never say those terms outside the bedroom to any woman but in the “bedroom” with my partner, they take on a specific understood meaning. Most men avoid using them fearing the backlash if used in the wrong context whereas I find their taboo nature empowering and arousing.