what was i trying to accomplish here

My goal isn’t to make people feel beautiful. It’s to make them realize that feeling beautiful doesn’t mean jack shit. Beauty fades. Beauty is not reliable. Beauty is subjective and fluctuating. You take up the space you want and say “I might not think I’m beautiful. Hell, I might be ugly to some people, but I still deserve to be here, to be loved, to do what I want.” I don’t think I’m beautiful at all, but I try not to stop that from getting in the way of living my life. That’s a much more powerful thought than “I’m beautiful too.” Don’t be afraid to be ugly and stop holding yourself to impossible standards in public. Ignore the male gaze. Ignore all gazes. Focus on yourself and what you’re trying to accomplish. 

Yaoi on Ice: Ep 5

Every week I find myself saying “Wow, this is they gayest thing I’ve ever seen” and every week, it’s true.

Viktor is his generally hilarious self full force all ep.

Surrounded by people in hoodies lol He looks like secret service.

Stupid Sexy Viktor. 

Poor Yuri looks like his life is flashing before his eyes. His poor little fanboy heart can’t take it.

This scene is made better with Yuri’s response.

That’s… not a thing, Yuri. But… I also understand 100% where you are coming from. 

Speaking of fanboys hearts lol Minami is Yuri to Yuri’s Viktor.

I don’t know what this was supposed to accomplish, Yuri. Don’t just slap guy’s asses. 

Poor Minami, meeting your crush again and then having your face rubbed in his lovey dovey relationship. I love how the rest of the people are either like “wow that’s hot” or “Dude, trying to watch skating here”

I’m going to make an icon of this. I feel like it represents their relationship so well. 

You’re welcome.

When non-shippers see their ship becoming official.

Viktor you teasing asshole. This would have been so sweet. But noooooo. New suit.

And of course what would this anime be without the queer baitiest previews ever.

I especially love how he just tagged all of their names. No commentary beyond “Wow!”. Wow WHAT? Wow Viktor is naked? Wow they are gay? Wow they were just making out???

  • What she says: I'm fine
  • What she means: Billie Joe Armstrong has been in an extremely successful band with his best friend from school since 1986, at 14 years old, their friendship is so strong to this day and I'm here twiddling my thumbs as useless as ever, not accomplishing anything with no friends
AMAZING Experience

3 days after PAX South and I am STILL in awe over everything that happened. Sorry this post took so long to put up, but I wanted to really gather my feelings and thoughts before making this.

Pax was amazing and a HUGE eye opener. YouTube as always been a dream for me and nothing more. I never really though I’d be able to accomplish it or even come close… I was always just along for the ride and hoping for the best. That’s all you really can do when MILLIONS of people are trying to do what you do. I’d upload everyday just trying to keep in the front of my mind that someone will see this, and it’ll make someone happy. Even if it was just ONE person, i could accomplish that mini goal everyday.

Time goes by and I get help from a ton of my friends, plus start to gain my own way of attracting people to my channel. It all happened so fast… and here we are today. Nearly 70K people in the OGfam and so close to achieving a dream I’ve had since I was 13.

However, it’s not about the number. It never has been. It’s always been about the community and the people behind it. I’ve had lots of numbers before and absolutely no community and I hated it so much. I felt so alone and felt like I was making content purely for myself. I enjoy making content for YOU guys AND myself. Never just one or the other.

Ever since 2017 started I’ve learned what it’s really like to have to actual people supporting you and rooting for you. You all have showed me that and I am SO grateful for this. Without you all, there is no way we could’ve been blessed to meet so many people at Pax South… no way we could’ve gotten a signing… probably no way I’d find my purpose in life… because of you all, I have hope in my dreams that they will happen someday. Maybe soon. Maybe later. Either way I’m here to stay. ☺💜🔥

Stay lit, never quit

My parachutes will guide me, safely to ground. But now the cord’s not working, and I see you staring me down.

I won’t, fall in love with falling. I will try to avoid those Eyes.

what she says: im fine

what she means: ive been looking through my old stuff trying to make myself cry because i feel like crying bc theres definitely some built up emotional issue happening here but the thought of me having emotions of love and romantic gestures that i tried doing some months ago dont make me sad anymore it just makes me want to actually vomit so like i dont really know what im trying to accomplish anymore so i put on a tiara and started screaming so thats where im at

Finding the right words has been challenging.

Since the moment I opened my eyes this morning I was fighting back the tears. I was trying not to wake my husband with my sniffles. I got up, and cried. I mean just tears falling, and it was at that moment I realized why am I fighting back these tears today? These are happy tears. They remind me of what I’ve done to get here. The challenges and obstacles. The victories and accomplishments.

Today is all about me. And I’m gonna keep smiling and crying as much as my heart wants. Because I earned this. Today is my day.

anonymous asked:

Is it true that Eth doesn't like x Reader fics/headcannons? And if so, what can I do to make sure *he* doesn't see them, but people who like them do?

Hello! I’m sorry it took me so long to reply! I’ve seen that post going around and tbh, its inaccurate! There’s no actual proof to their claims that Ethan is bothered by SFW writing (he does NOT approve of NSFW fics under any conditions), I understand that the OP and their rebloggers are just trying to keep Ethan comfortable; however all the post is accomplishing is worrying writers. Heres my proof for this!

Ethan claiming he supports all fanfiction that is NOT about him having sex with his friends. (Dated Dec 24, 2016)


Ethan stating that he does NOT enjoy NSFW fanfiction (Dated Dec 29, 2016)


Ethan stating he does support fanfiction as long as it is not NSFW. (Dated Dec 29, 2016)


Once again, Ethan stating he does not support fics about him having sex with his friends or nsfw content. (Dated March 20, 2017)


So! In conclusion, Ethan does not mind people writing SFW fanfiction, but is uncomfortable with NSFW fanfiction. So, I’d say if you’re writing NSFW eth fanfic/hcs/blurbs, just dont tag any part of it with his tag or anything containing his name or tag (but tbh id stop doing it altogether if i were you bc it makes him uncomfortable) but don’t feel bad if you’re writing cute little SFW fanfiction about like bird watching with Eth or whatever lmao. But if Ethan does say i’m wrong on this or does comment on this, i’m sure we will all respect that!

Anyway this has been my opinion and my citations on this!

hope this helped!! :)

perhaps that’s what scares me the most: the knowledge that all that i have ever written will one day turn into dust, and that children will draw pictures out of the ashes of my torn-out heart. how fitting. how morbid.

and i said to him, “please. please.” neither of us knew what i was begging for, what i hoped to accomplish with my knees pressed into the harsh carpeting and my lungs choking on the apologies lodged in my throat. absolution? i was never a believer in God; merely a girl trying to play him.

sunburnt shoulders and crooked smiles pressed into aching flesh; this is what i remember and this is what will destroy me.

—  the hourglass is half-empty & i’m still here // (h.q.)

I like the idea that Sebastian keeps using ‘best’ puns, uses them a lot, but the context changes. And it was actually Kay who started it off.

He introduces himself to someone as ‘Prosecutor Debeste, Sebastian Debeste’ and she chimes in with ‘The very best Sebastian!’ and he gets flustered.

Another time, and someone asks what Sebastian is trying to accomplish. What he’s doing. And someone, maybe it’s Gumshoe this time, goes; ‘He’s doing his best, pal!’ and he starts going pink… but also starts feeling better.

The name puns become less to do with being the best, and start being more about being the best Sebastian that he can be.

It ends up being somewhat like Apollo’s ‘I’m fine!’ - but here, he’s going ‘I’m the best I can be!’.

Took our baby on her first camping trip this weekend and hubs snapped this picture of us together. At first I was appalled with it and immediately cropped out my postpartum belly because I was too ashamed to show anyone because the sun seemed to perfectly highlight my lower belly. I always see proud moms posting their extra skin and stretch marks and I’ve always though they looked so beautiful still. I carried a baby for over nine months and have breastfed her for her entire life I should really give my body a break but its so hard to get used to this new body that seems to have zero waistline. Like HOW do celebs and instagram models go right back to normal without starving themselves and spending every second st the gym?! Like I’m starving from bf’d and I would much rather spend my time playing with my daughter than hours at the gym?? So anyway, here’s my “trying to be proud of what my body has accomplished” post…

saphael analysis

i’m so emotional. raphael’s seriously trying to get simon to warm up to him, and really, i think that when he sneaks up on him, tries to get him to stay/go places with him, etc., he’s really trying to get simon to assimilate and feel comfortable at his home. he really truly wants simon as a friend and wants him to feel comfortable, and this is raphael’s silly way of trying to accomplish that.

but what makes me sad is that simon still isn’t comfortable. i know it’s early on, and he’s probably only been with raphael for a week to a few weeks now (maybe less?) but simon’s still nervous. he’s not just nervous about what he is, his life, etc., but he’s nervous with raphael. look at this gif here:


if you look at simon’s reaction, he can’t tell that raphael isn’t upset. because really, raphael could care less and is thirsty for blackmail from his nerd not angry with simon at all, as we see by this scene and the next scene-when he makes up a position for simon in order for him to stay. but here, when raphael says this line, you can see simon’s worried expression. he looks genuinely nervous, like he doesn’t know what to expect next. he swallows deeply. he obviously still can’t see when raphael is teasing or when raphael cares/when he doesn’t, etc. 

in this scene, we get background knowledge that simon and raphael do talk and do discuss things. it’s nice to know that they must sit down and have conversations, or just a chance to talk about things, perhaps even personal stories? (i’m hoping)


the funny thing here, though, is that simon has the upper hand. he’s teasing raphael back, just like he does to him, and he’s being snarky. (cute, simon, snarky’s cute on you.) he isn’t worried about angering raphael too much (well, he does have the info, so he could just not be worried bc raphael can’t stop him from this one thing) and raphael looks tense instead. he’s trying to keep firm, but we all know raphael’s a tiny baby inside. he hides his soft interior with fancy language and an air of toughness. oh, child, it will come out eventually. hopefully simon will see this soon.

also, raphael trying to get him to stay. (sirens go off in the distance, people yell in joy) wow. like, he genuinely looks happy when he says “stick around.” he likes how he negotiated, and this is enough to want simon to stay. or at least, it’s an excuse. i’m not sure if he wants him to stay because he’s a good vampire in training, though. there’s something else behind this. he’s too keen… and that means he truly wants simon’s friendship/relationship!!

he also shows praise towards simon when he says “i’m surprised you know that much” after sneaking up on him. he is truly impressed with simon!! so impressed!! it’s wonderful. however, he gets simon back when he tells him that he should be working on training in reference to his enhanced senses, and by the look on simon’s face, you can tell that simon knows this is what he should be doing. he looks a bit ashamed, in a way. he knows he should be getting used to this place, and that he should be working on himself as a vampire. finally, in a way, simon is accepting it, but it’s just a small detail that hints us on that. 

simon also isn’t sure when raphael is joking just yet. when raphael sneaks up on him, simon isn’t even smiling afterwards. he’s probably still upset with his whole situation, too upset to laugh it off, but raphael is obviously teasing and doing this out of amusement. eventually, this will be funny to simon, when their relationship is closer and there’s more comfort.


(raphael’s smirk!! he’s holding back laughter. gotta tell you, he really is.)

lastly, though, i just want to point this out: raphael looks at simon with intent. 


my favorite thing about this gif above is that raphael’s gaze goes from simon’s eyes downward. he’s looking simon up and down, and like the other gifs in that post, everytime raphael looks at him, he’s glued to simon’s eyes with a unique intensity. he genuinely cares about every word out of the other’s mouth, and that look signifies feelings for simon (ding ding ding!!). but if we do take into account that raphael never looks anywhere but at simon’s eyes (like the sneaking up gif-his eyes don’t waver once), it should be interesting that raphael removes them in this gif above. maybe it’s because he’s nervous (the conversation was about things he didn’t want to discuss), maybe it’s because he’s distracted by simon’s gorgeousness, or maybe it’s something more… ;)


we have to get down to the bottom of this!! RAPHAEL CARES ABOUT SIMON SO MUCH!! is it love or friendship or vampire family-ness or what because it’s killing me.

raphael’s agreed to help simon from the beginning! first, he saved him from camile. second, he saved him from camille again, taking his body to clary and the others. third, he promised to watch and take care of him, going off to search for him. after simon states that he’s a monster, he truly cares, telling him softly that he will take him back to hotel dumort in safety and feed him, and welcome him home. he really wants simon to feel comfortable, and he’s trying so hard to make him feel comfortable. from the start!! also, when simon calls raphael a monster and then himself a monster, raphael visibly lightens and takes the statement to heart. he looks so upset. he doesn’t get mad, because somewhere inside, he probably thinks that’s true. he feels like a monster, but he’s trying to change, trying to show that he was human once too and he can feel and care and rescue and love. he feels so much emotion, and simon’s going to realize that soon enough. brb just made myself cry with this paragraph