what the hell did i just say

Art Museum

Summary: On your day off, you invite Bucky to an art museum. You’re sure he probably wants to spend his time doing something else besides looking at art, but you soon find that his definition of art might be a bit different than yours.

Word Count: 1,429.

A/N: Just another random idea that came in mind. Special thanks to @bovaria for being a doll and for previously reading this through. <3

Originally posted by dailyevanstan

Keep reading

From the Dining Table, Pt. 2 (Ethan)

Summary: Ethan finally comes across your letter after many years and begins his journey to find you.

Word Count: 2,181

Warnings: Vomiting, mentions of vomit

Author’s Note: I finally finished part 2! It ended a little differently than I had intended just because I was accumulating a large word count so quickly and I wanted to cut it short before I lost you guys… But, this means a part 3 will ensue! This is written from Ethan’s point of view, and it involves a couple flashbacks, so I hope you guys are able to follow along. Also, “Y/L/N” means “your last name.” Please let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy! Requests are open.

Part 1


“Breaking news coming out of Hollywood this morning… Ethan Dolan reportedly calls it quits in the middle of filming his latest movie after having what sources are calling a ‘nervous breakdown.’ The former YouTube sensation-turned-A-list-actor was said to have stormed off of set yesterday unprovoked and has not been seen or heard from by family and friends since. There has been no word on how long production on the movie has been stalled for, or if Dolan will be welcomed back to the cast should he choose to return to the film. We’ll continue to report the latest updates on this story as they come in.”

I shove my headphones into my ears and crank the volume up until the shrill voice of the E! News reporter disappears, disgusted that even in LAX, one of the world’s most famous and populated airports, celebrity gossip matters more than world affairs. Pulling the brim of my baseball cap down farther over my eyes, I shift in my seat and pray that no one is paying enough attention to their surroundings to recognize me. I’m sitting in the terminal completely alone and would like to keep it that way— no security guards, no screaming fans mobbing me, no soccer moms hesitantly walking up to me asking for a picture for their ‘daughter.’ Yeah, right. I know for a fact that some of those moms go out on movie dates with their girlfriends on Friday nights just to oodle over me and it’s absolutely disgusting. Don’t they have husbands waiting for them back home?

I sigh and glance down at my jean pocket holding the piece of paper that brought me to the airport in the first place. Is the E! News reporter incorrect in saying that I stormed off of set of the movie I was contracted to film months ago? No, actually, but she is incorrect in saying that it was ‘unprovoked.’ For the last couple of years, my life has been a whirlwind of traveling, transitioning from YouTube to making movies, red carpets, parties, drugs, alcohol, girls, it never seemed to end. The life I have now is everything I could have ever wanted at eighteen years old, but as I learned over time, it didn’t come without sleepless nights and regret over losing the one person that unapologetically stood by my side since we were kids. The more opportunities I was presented with, the more fame I gained, the farther I pushed her away and for what reason, I don’t remember now. But no matter how hard I tried to rid myself of her, she never left me. She haunted my dreams and called out for me when I would least expect it. I could hear her whispering to me in the wind and I would feel her body up against mine in every bed I slept in. Time didn’t make it better; in fact, it was quite the opposite. I most recently have been plagued with images of her choosing to marry someone else, to carry someone else’s children, and in the middle of one of those visions, I decided I had had enough. That’s when I found the letter, and after spending hours reading it, re-reading it, kicking myself for putting her through so much pain, and bawling at the realization of what I had become, I dashed to the airport knowing exactly where I would find her.

A couple other people in the terminal begin to shift in their seats and look at their tickets. I rip one headphone out of my ear just in time to hear the airline employee call for the boarding of first class passengers. Grabbing my backpack and ticket, I fly to the front of the line, head down, hoping to create as little of a scene as possible.

“Welcome aboard, Mr. Dolan,” the employee coos as she scans my ticket and checks my I.D. all too slowly. “What business do you have flying to Newark today?”

What business do I have? What business does she have asking that question?

“I… um… I’m paying an overdue visit to an old friend,” I mumble, trying to keep the irritation in my voice at bay.

“Ah, I see. Well, I hope you have a safe and comfortable trip back home.” She flashes a toothy smile as I take off to find my seat in the aircraft. With so much pep in her voice, I wonder how many glasses of wine she drinks at night before being able to dull the aching emptiness in her chest.

Wait, did she just say, ‘back home?’ How the hell would she have known that I… Oh god, she’s a closeted fan, too. Yep, E! News is going to sink their teeth into that headline: “An AWOL Ethan Dolan was spotted by an LAX employee boarding a plane to New Jersey, seemingly desperate to get back to his home state. What could he possibly be trying to run away from in L.A.? Or, could he be running toward something instead?”

I settle into the cushioned seat, my mind trying struggling to remember the last time I flew on a commercial aircraft. I almost forgot how to even book a ticket in the first place; having done it on a computer last, trying to confirm one on my phone on the way here proved to be even more difficult. My brain continues to search, scanning over memories in reverse chronological order until it lands on the right one, forcing up a wave of nostalgia and nausea, too:


“Y/N!” I shouted, hunched over the Mac in the living room of our dingy apartment. “Come here! I want to show you something!”

“What is it, babe?” Her voice cascaded through the air and settled on my skin, giving me goosebumps. God, how I loved her voice.

“I can’t tell you! You’ll have to come see it.”

Her slippers dragged against the carpet as she approached me from her bedroom. I stood up to block the computer screen, not wanting to give the surprise away before I was ready.

“E, sweetheart, this better be super important,” she scolded, entering the room. “I was in the middle of my history mid-term paper and I had a groove going.”

I took in her beauty as she leaned against the door frame, crossing one leg over the other. Her hair was thrown into a ponytail at the top of her head, her reading glasses were falling down her nose, and the skin on her lips was peeling, most likely resulting from the way she constantly chewed on them when she was anxious or deep in thought. She was wearing an old hand-me-down t-shirt that she acquired from her older brother years ago, and because he was over a head taller than her, she was swimming in the fabric. Her legs were bare, but the shirt was so long on her body that she wasn’t revealing much. Her skin glowed in the light and the amused smirk on her face made my head spin.

Wow, I thought to myself in shock. This girl is all mine.

“E? Ethan? What was it you wanted to show me?” Her voice shook me from my thoughts and I broke out in a child-like grin.

“This paper is the last final you have to submit, right?”

“Yes…”

“And then you’re not only done for the semester but done with your college career, right?”

“Yes, Ethan, we’ve talked about this.”

“And your commencement ceremony is tomorrow at noon?”

“Ethan, did you get knocked over the head with something? We’ve been discussing my graduation for months now.”

“I know, I know we have. But, what we haven’t talked about is the fact that the ceremony isn’t the only place you—uh—I mean, we, have to be tomorrow.”

Y/N cocked her head to the side and walked over to me. “Ethan… what is going on?”

I took a couple of steps to the right to reveal the hotel reservations and flight confirmation number displayed on the computer screen, barely able to contain my excitement. “We have a 6:30 flight tomorrow from L.A. to Orlando. Happy graduation-slash-early-birthday-present, babe. I’m taking you to Disney World.”


I smile at the memory of Y/N’s disbelief as it melted into shock, the shock then morphing into elation. Disney World, while being one of the most cliché vacations a couple could take together, had always been a top vacation destination for her since she was a child. She was never able to visit when she was young because her parents struggled financially, but I had the ability to make one of her childhood dreams come true, something she never stopped thanking me for. Had I known the flight to Orlando wasn’t just going to be the last time I would fly on a commercial plane, but with Y/N in general, I would have cherished the moment more. She was always my favorite person to travel with. I would have gone anywhere in the world with her.

I begin to gag from vomit trying to force its way up my throat. For some reason, my regret is always paired with puke, but refusing to let it get the best of me, I fish in the front pocket of my backpack for my bottle of pills I was first prescribed after telling my doctor about my visions of Y/N. Opening the cap, I pour out four Ativan and wash them down with a bottle of water I bought after clearing security. I close my eyes and lean back in my seat, letting the medication run through my system and forcing the thought of Y/N away from my mind.

I just need five hours in the air to think about absolutely nothing. I just need five hours of darkness and silence in order to face what I have done.


“Ethan? Ethan Dolan in the flesh and blood?”

I look down at the concrete porch of Y/N’s childhood home, shamefully unable to meet the gaze of her mother standing on the threshold of her front door.

“Hi, Mrs. Y/L/N. Yes, it’s me.”

“Ethan, what business do you have showing up at my door after eight years of not speaking to my family?”

I pop my head up. Eight years? It’s been eight years since seeing Y/N last? I grab the letter out of my pocket and unfold it to see when it was dated, something that I stupidly didn’t think to pay attention to when I first found it.

Oh, my god… Y/N dated the letter six years ago; she waited on me for two and a half years in L.A. before moving back home, and it still took me another six years to find this thing. How despicable.

Disgusted with myself, I suddenly become dizzy and lean over the porch railing to vomit into the grass below. Mrs. Y/L/N steps out onto the porch and places her hand on my back, rubbing it gently until I stop dry heaving long enough to catch my breath.

“You’re being kind to me, Mrs. Y/L/N, even after everything I’ve done,” I observe.

“Holding anger and hatred for someone never does any good, no matter how much they’ve hurt you, Ethan. I see you found Y/N’s note. I’m assuming that’s why you’re here?”

I nod, gripping the piece of paper tighter. “Would you be able to tell me where to find her?”

“I can, but you might not like the answer.”

I raise an eyebrow, another wave of nausea washing over me.

“She bought the house, Ethan. The brick house on the corner of Oak Street, the one that–“

“The one that we talked about buying together since we were fourteen,” I finish for her.

Mrs. Y/L/N shrugs her shoulders. “Once your channel took off and she moved to L.A. with you, she started college out there and I thought maybe that dream became more of a fleeting thought for her. I don’t think she expected to ever come back to New Jersey; I certainly didn’t expect her to, at least because I knew that she would follow you wherever you went and I knew that you wouldn’t end up back here… You were destined for greater things than this town could offer you. But I suppose Y/N never forgot about it, after all.”

I press my lips into a hard line, working to keep my tears at bay. “You’re right, I don’t like that answer.”

“Well, then you should know one more thing.”

“What’s that?”

“She doesn’t live there alone, Ethan.”

Fishing the keys of my rental car out of my other pocket, I glance sideways at Mrs. Y/L/N. “What do you mean?”

“I think it’s best that you find out for yourself, but be prepared. What you find might hurt you.” Mrs. Y/L/N places a peck on my cheek. “It was nice to finally see you again, Ethan.”

I close my eyes, desperately afraid that my visions of Y/N weren’t just visions after all.

“Thanks. You too. I just hope Y/N feels the same way.”

anonymous asked:

something that bothers me with kylo is that he wants to be the person anakin wish he never was. "show me grandfather and i will finish what you started" ummm last i checked, he did. he turned to the dark side but when he killed palpatine and saved luke, he fulfilled his prophecy. he literally /finished/ what he started. & ppl got mad at me for saying this is anakin's story (hell george said it himself) & it still is. his son and daughter, his history & his nephews actions. its still about anakin

YEP honestly as far as i’m concerned the real main story of star wars is 1-6, all these other movies are just fun extras but not the core of the saga

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 4

It’s amazing to see how much we can create together, my amigos. Here’s part 4.

  1. “Look, I might be evil but even I have standards.”
  2. “Do your parents know you’re dating Death?” “No, I promised we wouldn’t get back together after he broke up with me the first time.”
  3. “Wait why am I naked and covered in cheese?”
  4. “Good god, that cake is fuckin stale and dry mate!!” “Just like how you are recently? Gee, thanks.”
  5. "There is always time for a high-five.”
  6. “Karen, what would ever posses you to find me here.”
  7. “Oh my god, put that man down! Come on, let’s go get you some REAL food.”
  8. “A demonic sugar glider?”
  9. “People always say they never thought they would be here but I absolutely did.”
  10. “And I thought I was a bit weird. But you! You are insane!”
  11. “So your hair knows kung-fu? Ha, that’s nothing! MY hair knows HAIR-ATE!” (You know, as in karate) (This used to be an insider between me and a friend…)
  12. “One day, darling, you and I are going to conquer the Universe not just our world.”
  13. “Did you seriously think they wouldn’t notice when their humans went missing?!”
  14. “Well, maybe next time you should consider that not everyone wants to be woken up at four in the morning by a- what IS that, anyway?!”
  15. “Now, how exactly did your foot get stuck in the barrel?”
  16. “I hope you realize what you’re doing. This forest never ends, you know that, right?”
  17. “You can’t just kill someone and then make it all better by saying sorry!”
  18. “Why the fuck is my cat levitating?!” “He said he wanted to feel what flying was”
  19. “You’re trying to tell me you killed three men…with a microphone?”
  20. “Hang on, are you a John Wick fan?”
  21. “IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING!” “And?” “ I have a strict no murder rule until eight. Call me then.”
  22. “I did realize you were going to be naked the whole time”
  23. “Ok, I understand you like animals, but you can’t just bring a tiger into the apparent without asking!”
  24. “I…I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’m so sorry.”
  25. “OH MY GOD CATHERINE! I JUST SAW A NARWHAL! I’M TELLING YOU, I SAW A FREAKIN’ WHALE UNICORN!”
  26. “I gotta go, I left my toaster in the oven!
  27. "Why is there a gaggle of fancy buisness men on my front lawn?”
  28. “Can you please stop referring to me as ____! That’s not my name!” “Then what is?” “I don’t know!”
  29. *Sarcastic* “Yeah, sure. I won’t at all mind being your footslave.” “Oh, goody! I knew you’d agree!” “Wait, what?”
  30. “When are you going to give up on this whole ‘evil’ thing?” “When it stops being so much fun!”
  31. “You didnt say to KILL the man!” “WELL I DIDNT SAY NOT TOO”
  32. “Mum, Dad… I’m gay.” “That’s nice, honey, but now is not the right time!”
  33. “Take a look at your soul and consider your life choices! Oh wait, that’s right! You don’t fucking have a soul!” “Oh, god, just go drown in a bathtub of syrup why don’t ya?”
  34. “I kindly ask you to please quit making your heart stop. It’s creeping me out!” “So… Y-You were sleeping in a coffin” “Yeah I’m used to it” “Are you a vampire or what?! How can someone get used to sleep in a coffin?” “No I’m used to sleep I never said that I’m used to sleep in a freaking coffin!”
  35. “Darling I love you, more than I can ever express in words…. But please stop teaching chickens necromancy.”
  36. “I wanted to know why you stole souls, not your melodramatic backstory…”
  37. “I really wish that old white man would stop rubbing his nipples at me”
  38. “You know it is written: Do not summon Satan, right ?”
  39. “Look around, what is this?” “My room?” “No, this is pathetic.”
  40. “I’ve been a professor for 20 years, and yet still my greatest secret hasn’t been revealed–I can’t read.”
  41. “Our souls don’t belong in these 'human’ bodies, every one of us is implanted here from another galaxy, and this has been the case for a thousand years. No one knows what 'actual humans’ are like without us inhabiting them.”
  42. “Did you just create a portal in time and space to pull another version of yourself into this world so I have to deal with another annoying idiot?” “No but thanks for the idea.”
  43. “You’re bleeding?!” “Nah, I’m frolicing in a field of flowers - yes I’m bleeding!”
  44. “Let me get this straight. I tell you that I make a decent omelette and you somehow equate that to qualification for piloting a spaceship?”
  45. “It’s the weekend! Let’s hit the town! See a concert, redo our wardrobes, get high, start a crime ring, I don’t know.”
  46. “Keep running, you’ve only got 4HP!”
  47. “This is clearly your first time. Stop screaming already, you’ll wake the neighbors!”
  48. “Has anyone seen the outdoors?” “What the fuck is an outdoors?”
  49. “Why do I feel like this again, I thought we were done with this?”
  50. “Look, as much as I like to hang out with you, I’ve gotta go and save the earth. Toodles!”
  51. “Have you seen?… oh shit”
  52. “Two questions: one, how many matches do you have, and two, where do you keep your socks?”
  53. “Because fuck surveys, that’s why!”
  54. “Stop yelling out the window or the koalas will rip your face off!”
  55. “I guess when I heard 'Night of Debauchery’… I didn’t picture muffins on your pajamas.”
  56. “Honey, you can’t keep throwing people to the pit of pain and despair just because they don’t like choc mint ice cream.”
  57. “Oh, no honey, put that back…”
  58. “It’s going to be too late, you know. It’s always too late.”
  59. “Hey, so, uh… I’m in trouble…” “What did you do this time?” “I got stranded in Wales….. again…”
  60. “OK, but… how do we get the dog out of a hole in space in time exactly?”
  61. “Aren’t people supposed to grow instead of shrink ?”
  62. “Wait. You’re aroused?” “Why would that surprise you?” “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  63. "I pay your taxes”
  64. “No, ____. We did not raise our hamster like this.”
  65. “You can’t run from your own shadow(s), what makes you think you can run from theirs?”
  66. “You adopted… a dog?” “Mate, that’s not a dog.”
  67. “And at this moment, he decided to punch himself in the face.” “Narrator, listen, I know you’ve been with me my whole life, but you’re a huge jerk.”
  68. “Why didn’t you tell me it was a portal BEFORE we ended up here?”
  69. “Is that…the Mona Lisa.” “…Yes…” “What did I say to you about stealing priceless artifacts!?” “…That I had to take you with me next time.” “Exactly!”
  70. “Yes, I agree, magic is pretty cool. But did you really have to use it for THIS?”
  71. “Despite the fact that was epic, you’re still suspended”
  72. “Chill, dad it’s not what you think it is!” “Well it looks like you’re making out with the demon your grandma banished to cellar…WHY IS HE IN YOUR ROOM?”
  73. “If you truly love me you’ll let me-OH FUCKING HELL DID YOU JUST STAB ME!?”
  74. “Spoon”
  75. “What began as a conflict over the transfer of consciousness from flesh to machines escalated into a war which has decimated a Million worlds.The ___ and the ___ have all but exhausted the the resources of a galaxy in their struggle for domination. Both sides, now crippled beyond repair, the remnants of their armies continue to battle on ravaged planets, their hatred fueled by over four thousand years of total war. This is a fight to the death. For each side, the only acceptable outcome is…“
  76. ”… I’m going back to bed. You brought it here, you can deal with the mammoth yourself.“
  77. "Is the food supposed to be moving?”
  78. “You mean to tell me that in the two minutes I was gone,  you bombed a minor country,  got married to a stripper,  and assassinated a world leader?!”
  79. “Is that a unicorn???? EATING MY BEEF JERKY?!”
  80. “Do I get to dream about you again tonight?”
  81. “Well now I have to change clothes AGAIN!”
  82. “All of this was because of a… OF A PLUSHIE?!” “Well…Yeah?” “Great, how are we going to get out of jail now?!”
  83. “So…you gonna tell me why my brother is upside down and why you’re wearing my purple thong?”
  84. “Did you really have to burn down another Cracker Barrel?”
  85. “Sir, that’s impossible, you can’t do that.” “IS THAT A FUCKING CHALLENGE?!?!”
  86. “We need to invade Portugal.” “…Sure, why not?”
  87. “Did you divide by zero?! YOU’RE GOING TO KILL US ALL”
  88. “Stand down, Milady, this is a matter between gentlemen with mustaches.”
  89. “Next time you get arrested I am NOT paying your bail” “That’s a lie and you know it.” “….”
  90. “I thought you were dead.” “So did I”
  91. “John dont flush the dog down the toilet”
  92. “What did I say again about resurrecting dictators??”
  93. “Cucumbers are NOT pets… what do you mean, you ate him??”
  94. “Are you and God seriously fighting right now? And what happened to Satan?”
  95. “Are ferrets supposed to be blue??”
  96. “I’m the protagonist? Well I guess that explains why I look like about a thousand other people.”
  97. “Why do I do this to myself?”
  98. “Stop eating your tortilla chips with ketchup. It’s unattractive.”
  99. “How do you eat an entire cheese wheel in one sitting?”
  100. “Why are God and Satan moving in with us?”

Let’s make one more ‘100 Dialogue Prompts’ list together. Leave a comment with your prompt below. Don’t forget the double quotes “”. And as always, only one prompt per amigo! Also, here is your random Dutch word of the day: pindakaas

best “history of the entire world, i guess” quotes (courtesy of a huge history nerd, me)
  • and make crazy sounds with their voice. ‘gneurshk.’
  • what? you can walk over here? cool. (not anymore) well i guess we’re stuck here now
  • coming soon to a dank river valley near you
  • clop clop. it’s the people with the horses.
  • here’s some huge heads. must be the olmecs.
  • oops china just broke
  • knock knock it’s chandragupta. he says “get the hell out of here. will you get the hell out of here if i give you 500 elephants? ok thanks bye.”
  • let’s check the greekification levels of the greekified kingdoms
  • “heyyy” said the romans, eating the entire mediterranean for breakfast
  • is loving jesus legal yet?
  • so he goes down to the cube where everyone worships gods
  • they did many crusades. some of which almost didn’t fail. 
  • the king of mali is so rich he’s going on a tour to let everyone know
  • whoops half of europe just died
  • “wait!” said christopher columbus, probably smoking crack
  • “that’s bullshit. this whole thing is bullshit. that’s a scam. fuck the church. here’s 95 reasons why” said martin luther
  • [whispering] they never got ethiopia
  • the economy’s great and probably will be great forever - just kidding.
  • look out china, there’s a new china in china
  • the united states finally decided whether racism is good or bad. they decided it’s bad. and the world agrees. south africa might need another minute to think about it.
Hamilton AU where instead of the war its a cook off

“Son, I am working with a third of what this recipe calls for!”

“I go to france for more bisque, I come back with with more whisks, and bowls, and now we’re in control”

“What did I miss? What did I miss? I followed the recipe step by step”

“Say no to this, i just gotta say no to this, ohmygod shes using lemon zest and her icings saying hell yes”

“In every dish Of endless fish And when you made quiche
I hoped it would burn”

youtube

MIKAEL IS GONNA GET A JOB

ELIAS: Now we’re on our way to.. Hey, guys! Where are we going? Expericon! That’s where Mikael is going to a job interview.

MIKAEL: Yeah

[BROKE FUCKER]

ELIAS: Or he’s a black fucker. You’ll never get a job, bro. They’re scared of terrorism. It’s true! You’ll never get a job, man.

YOUSEF: I’m gonna give you a few tips.

ELIAS: Watch out, watch out, watch out! Look at them!

ADAM: Oh, look at me, my name is Yousef and I know everything about getting a job because I work in a kindergarten. The only reason I got a job there is because my aunt used to work there and that’s why I’m gonna give you all the tips on going to a job interview. The most important part of getting a job is not to use your foreign last name. Your name isn’t Boukhal, today your name is Øverlie.

MUTASIM: Look at the old guy with the grey jacket.

ADAM: Yeah, guys, let’s cross the road. Now we’re done.

ELIAS: Did he give you any good tips?

MIKAEL: Shut up! None of you have a job either.

MUTASIM: You’re too poor!

MIKAEL: Because yours truly, Mikael, is going to a job interview, I thought I’d give you some advice.

[Tips to get the job]

ELIAS: The first advice is: get a haircut before you go. Don’t have as long hair as this guy. Take off your hood!

MUTASIM: Remember, just lie. Lie the entire time. Don’t be yourself.

ADAM: First of all, you have to be full. Don’t use your real name in the application if you’re a foreigner. Get a new name or you won’t get a job in Norway.

ELIAS: Where the fuck are we? We’re just walking and walking and walking..

MIKAEL: I think we’re going the right way.

ELIAS: Excuse me! DO you know where Expericon is?

[We found you]

ELIAS: We wish this cutie, Mikael, good luck on his interview.

ADAM: Good luck.

MUTASIM: Group shake!

ELIAS: Put it down, put it down.

MUTASIM: You’re just messing around!

MIKAEL: Five, six, seven, eight.

ELIAS: Talk to you later!

ADAM: Now, Mikael is at his job interview.

ELIAS: Stop banging! Maybe people are sleeping.

ADAM: He’s been in there for a long time. Guys! There he is!

ELIAS: Quick! Say it to the camera! How was it? What did they say? Talk!

MIKAEL: I don’t think I’ll get it.. Because I think we’re at the wrong building.

ELIAS: Huh?

MIKAEL: I think it’s in Drammen.

MUTASIM: Fucking hell!

ELIAS: Why were you gone for such a long time then, bro?

MIKAEL: I was walking around, looking for the guy I was supposed to meet.

ADAM: For half an hour?

MIKAEL: Yeah, man!

ELIAS: There you have it! An example of idiocy! That’s all for today.

YOUSEF: Good bye!

ELIAS: Talk to you later!

If we don’t end up together and we belong to other people please tell your kids about me. Tell your daughter to be fearless but also build walls around her so guys won’t break her heart like you broke mine. Tell your son to be tender and consistent in every decision, to listen to what his heart says and not what everybody else tells him to, like you did. Tell them that for every person there’s another person who would go through everything just to be with them, like I did for you. Teach them that giving up on the person who sees the world in their eyes just because times are hard will make them drown in regret, like you probably are right now. Most importantly teach them to be fighters and not quitters on that certain person who goes to hell and back, like I did.
100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 5

Great team work, amigos. Here’s is part 5! 

  1. “Why is there a naked Ken Barbie doll tied up in your room?” “Goddammit, ____! I told you not to go in there!”
  2. “No Candice, I am NOT selling you my soul again.”
  3. “why is the fairy holding a gun.”
  4. “Jesus Christ on a boat made of crackers, what are you doing outside of the pod ship again?”
  5. “WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT” “He said I couldn’t… and I thought it was a challenge…”
  6. “How the fuck did you dye the ocean ORANGE?!”
  7. “Why are the roses green?”
  8. “Great, you made death angry.”
  9. ”この___だ!”
  10. “That better be a press on tattoo.”
  11. “If you only listened to the nature, you could learn more than humans ever passed to us.”
  12. “So, we’re dead?” “Well, kind of… yeah.”
  13. “Remind me again why you have a centaur tied up in your truck?”
  14. “Can you stop staring into my soul every time we meet? I feel exposed.”
  15. “You do realize that he wasn’t breathing when he spoke to us, right?”
  16. “I liked you better when you where possessed by that demon friend of yours”
  17. “You’re absolutely in love with him and have been for at least 2 years if you don’t go tell him how you feel I swear to god I will”
  18. “There are worse things in life than death.” “Nobody asked you,Lucifer.” “Just saying.”
  19. “Well, it’s wonderful that you’re having a sexuality crisis, but in case you forgot, we’re kind of in the middle of STOPPING THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!”
  20. “Why is there a horse crashing on our couch?” “Oh, that’s Satan.”
  21. “Why would I hang out with you? You’re so incompetent! Your sacrifice to the faeries was so insufficient!”
  22. “Where the hell did the dragon go?! He was right here!”
  23. “Ok, the recipie calls for two cups of lemon and a cup of sugar, but all I see are cough syrup and battery acid…”
  24. “What do you mean today’s not a Tuesday?!”
  25. “So everyone on Earth had the same dream as me?”
  26. “you know what will solve that? Scotch.”
  27. “I didn’t ask for this!” “… you didn’t?”
  28. “How is it that the least likely outcome is always the outcome I receive?!” “You should go buy a lottery ticket.”
  29. “Guys, i know you’re all busy, but if any of you wants the dinner done, i will need my arm back”
  30. “Of COURSE I care about you. That’s why I sold your soul on the black market.”
  31. “JOHN I AM BEGINNING TO QUESTION THE VALIDITY OF YOUR PLAN” “AS AM I ALEX, AS AM I”
  32. “What?”
  33. “I will take the concept of my rage, transform it into a physical weapon, and use it to BEAT YOU TO DEATH!”
  34. “Did you really HAD to slap the shark?!” “I mean… If you want me to kick it-”
  35. “I don’t care, your tamagotchi dying is not an excuse to wake me up before noon!”
  36. “You are telling me that the socks with hearts that I’ve been mocking since the first day you arrived are, in fact, what keep you alive?” “Yes!” “What?”
  37. “So you really want me to believe that you’re actually from the future?”
  38. “Dude. What have you done. Now we HAVE TO save those aliens!”
  39. “Can you just stop?” “God no, why would I do that?”
  40. “Hey at least I get laid doing it”
  41. “While that’s a lovely story, it doesn’t quite explain the fires.”
  42. “Dude, please tell me that you planned to deal with her guardian angel when you killed her.”
  43. “That’s such a stupid idea… let’s do it.”
  44. “What do you MEAN this just HAPPENS?!” “All the time, actually.”
  45. “I swear, one day you’ll kill us both.” “Oh please, I’ve never been that reckless.” “…” “That was ONE TIME!”
  46. “Why did you buy a nuke?!” “Why wouldn’t I? It was on sale”
  47. “I am fueled purely by rage and instant coffee.”
  48. “How are you a million years old, bit you can’t even remember who George Washington is?”
  49. “Because I gave not, a single shit.”
  50. “Is that a marijuana? In my good  Christian suburbs?!”
  51. “WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT KILLING PEOPLE?? YOU NEVER USE THE DRAGON, YOU IDIOT”
  52. “I don’t care if he’s a unicorn, NO ONE EATS MY MINI EGGS!”
  53. “Jesus Christ Lewis! *Again* with the Snails?” “It’s Thursday! You said Thursday’s were okay!”
  54. “Here’s a story for you. I woke up in Vegas as a makeup guru. I was REALLY drunk.”
  55. “If all your friends jumped off a cliff would you…WAIT, NO IT WAS A JOKE, STOP!”
  56. “You’re kinda like hitchhiking Ghost Busters, aren’t you?”
  57. “For gods sake, ditch the fanny pack”
  58. “Take the tomato!” “No, I don’t want the tomato” “JUST TAKE THE TOMATO”
  59. “‘That’s no moon!’ Everyone  remembered Jimmy’s words that night as he scolded his friends for half-heartedly pulling their pants down.”
  60. “WHY IS THERE A BEAR IN MY BATHROOM”
  61. “Can you believe it?” “Just barely.”  "Man, I never thought he would ACTUALLY throw the chair.“
  62. "What did you THINK girl scout cookies were made of?”
  63. “Really? That’s not what I heard from Mrs. Sanchez across the hall!”   “Mom she’s literally a possessed cow, why do you listen to her?”
  64. “You got the rubber chicken, cheese whiz, and dish soap?” “Yep” “Ok, let’s do this!”
  65. “Are you building a life-sized Godzilla at 3am again?”
  66. “Don’t get pissy at me, YOU’RE the one who didn’t say what kind of tea bags to get for the clown!”
  67. "So YOU’RE the guy the math textbooks warned us about.”
  68. “Where’s our cat?” “I thought you were responsible for it?..”
  69. “What do you mean I’m half demon”
  70. “why are you duct taping a cat to the ceiling?” “aesthetic.”
  71. “Hope is a lie. So is philosophy, morality, language in general, the sky, dogs, and about a third of the population of Michigan.”
  72. “So let me get this straight. You filled a Darth Vader costume… With cats?”
  73. “How did I die this time?” “Well, it was pretty quick. I missed it, but from what I can tell, you convinced an entire school of 4000 people to throw watermelons at you all at the same time.” “…And?” “The impact of the watermelons threw you back a couple hundred kilometers and you landed in the ocean…inside the mouth of a particularly hungry shark.” “Goddamn it I wanted this death to be metal!”
  74. “Yesterday I learned that my childhood friend was a demon.”
  75. “Please tell me you said 'What bothers me most.’ "Yes? What the hell did you think I said?” Well….it kinda sounded like “His father’s meatloaf.’
  76. "Goddammit, why won’t you die?!”  "I DON’T FUCKING KNOW! “
  77. "I’d appreciate it if you fucking stopped, thanks.”
  78. “What the hell is this?” “It’s jello, you eat it”
  79. "You didn’t” “I did and I made them watch”
  80. "Why in the hell did you think this was a good idea?” “Look, YOU try saying 'No’ to not just a primordial deity, but my little sister as well.” “…Ok, you got me there.”
  81. “How do you know that it’s supposed to look like this?”
  82. “Are you making *tea*?!” “Well what else am I supposed to do?” “I don’t know maybe STOP THE MONSTER THATS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US!!”
  83. “Why are you in a dress?” “Lucifer wanted to have a tea party. You don’t say no to Lucifer”
  84. “So you’re telling me that aliens invaded while I was on vacation?”
  85. “I appreciate the gesture but I prefer my horses fried rather than alive.”
  86. *whining* “But Mooommm, I don’t want to save the woooorrld!”
  87. “Now I know not to cry there”
  88. “What if we DIDNT kill the king every Thursday” “Good idea we’ll kill him on Fridays instead.”
  89. “So you’re a zombie now?” “I guess I am” “So what are you gonna do about it?” “*shrug* I don’t know….”
  90. “I guess you weren’t joking when you said that the world is ruled by ants”
  91. “When I die, tell everyone 'I told you so.’”
  92. “You’re not real… You’re only in those silly books!” “Correction, my dear, you’re the fictional one.”
  93. “There was no 'free pie’ you moron! You stole it!”
  94. “Okay, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that my pet rock has gained sentience, just like we planned! The bad news is that it turns out he’s evil and is currently building a rock army with the intent of taking over the world. aaaand, he’s trying to get Mt. Everest on his side.”
  95. “Why is our baby on a wanted poster?”
  96. “Zombies are people too, Mom!”
  97. “… I’m gonna go for it. Hold my head for me real quick, and don’t put it on a mannequin like you did last time.”
  98. “Fascinating… I was unaware that was physically plausible.” “I know right.”
  99. “ACHOO!” “Bless you.” “No sorry, that won’t work on me.”
  100. “Bye, Felicia. Take you and your cat ears! GO!”

Prepare yourselves, because starting from tomorrow we will be making ‘100 Prompts That Will Make You Cry’ lists. Hope you enjoy this one. Which prompt do you like the most?

On Hot Pepper Gaming

Hot Pepper Gaming had its last episode today and I wanted to write something personal about it. I had this joke that I would always say when somebody talked to me about the channel - that it was sort of silly how the most successful thing I’ve ever done was the dumbest idea I’ve ever had. Classic self-deprecation, but the more I said it the more I realized just how important this dumb idea was to me.

Myself, Erin, and Jared started HPG half as a joke and half as a creative outlet to sort of prove that we knew what we were talking about. When we began, we were all lower-rung creatives working predominantly at Maker Studios - a YouTube multi-channel network. My only claim-to-fame at that point in my creative career was that I had something small to do with the Harlem Shake becoming a thing, and I really, REALLY didn’t want that to be the only accomplishment I had in my life.

I approached Erin about the idea, who called up Jared to join up with us. With a borrowed camera, $20 worth of craft supplies, and a weekend of work, we had shot the first three episodes of Hot Pepper Gaming. We planned to post weekly for a couple months regardless of if it gained traction or not, but on the first episode we were already growing faster than we could follow.

It’s sort of a funny thing how collaboration works. I remember being completely fine with filming Hot Pepper Gaming on a white background, but Erin’s simple suggestion that we use a yellow backdrop meant so much to the branding and style of the channel that I don’t think we would have succeeded without it. Erin, Jared and I all had something to contribute to the project, all of which combined together to create something much bigger than the sum of our parts. And because of this we were able to travel around the world, interact with fans, and sit in rooms with people we respected not only as their creative equals, but later on as their dear friends.

There’s so many great stories that I’ll post whenever I get nostalgic about Hot Pepper Gaming, but for now I just wanted to say something small that I think might describe my feelings better than me droning on about this will. We used to film Hot Pepper Gaming out of Erin’s old apartment, and after the first shoot we decided to grab dinner at a bar next door. I remember us all sitting at the bar, eating pub burgers and toasting to whatever the hell we just did, in our post-pepper andrenaline-rushed euphoria. I remember one of us asking hey, what if this actually does well, and then us all shrugging and laughing.

I’m currently on a flight back from Montreal, Canada, where Jared and I participated in Square Bowl, a yearly charity event that this year supported Doctors Without Borders. We were sitting on a balcony of an apartment in Le Plateau-Mont-Royal, watching the sun set over a park that was freshly-covered with snow. He and I talked for a while about how we were raising money for an important charity with a group of friends and creative collaborators we loved; and how so many of them we knew, specifically, because we had hurt them with hot peppers.

I don’t know what I would say to 24-year-old, fighting-tooth-and-nail-to-create-stuff-and-have-people-care-about-them Vernon if I had the chance, but to think about myself then and see myself now is surreal. I owe so much to this dumb little project, and I’ll never forget it.

Thanks

Find your dialogue prompt!

A: The first letter of your first name!

B: Your birthday!


  • A: “Can I help you?”
  • B: “Be gentle.”
  • C: “Help me find my scarf!”
  • D: “What happened to your arm?”
  • E: “What the hell happened here?!”
  • F: “How are you feeling?”
  • G: “Well, this is interesting! Did you know-”
  • H: “I just thought of a world without puppies and got really sad.”
  • I: “I love you.”
  • J: “Please kill me.”
  • K: “Want to know how I got these scars?”
  • L: “On go, we’re going to run, okay?”
  • M: “Help me.”
  • N: “Did you hear that?”
  • O: “Kiss me.”
  • P: “What’s your favorite sin?”
  • Q: “Does God ever say ‘Oh my God’?”
  • R: “We’re stuck in a maze!”
  • S: “So, today I was thinking we should-”
  • T: “Did you just murder someone?!”
  • U: “Code Yellow, I repeat code yellow!”
  • V: “I want to show you something.”
  • W: “Can we cuddle?”
  • X: “Do you want to talk about your childhood?”
  • Y: “Who wants to die today?“
  • Z: "I am the hero this city needs!”

  1. “Oh, I saw a spider”
  2. “You shouldn’t have had that sixth cup of coffee.”
  3. “Speaking of that, I just got laid.”
  4. “That should be illegal.”
  5. “High School Musical.”
  6. “Speaking of gay, I’m gonna go do some gay stuff right now.”
  7. “Unrealistic.”
  8. “I hope you outlast your relatives.”
  9. “Easy, psycho.”
  10. “I won!”
  11. “I’m confused, as usual.”
  12. “I volunteer as tribute.”
  13. “It’s magic!”
  14. “Dang, I was so close…”
  15. “I have a headache.”
  16. “I love being left alone.”
  17. “Can I kiss you?”
  18. Please, tell me more.”
  19. “Stay quiet!”
  20. “Oh maaaaan, sounds amazing, who can resist!”
  21. “That’s so gay.”
  22. “This is all your fault.”
  23. “Are you okay?”
  24. “No.”
  25. “A badly timed joke?”
  26. “I want to leave.”
  27. “5 more minutes.”
  28. “I’m calling the police!”
  29. “Queue the music.”
  30. “Stop following me!”
  31. “We’re all going to die.”

(if you get something confusing, then try to explain it, BAM, you’re writing)

archie-thecookiemonster  asked:

do you have any thoughts or head canons about adhd lance?

All I Do Is Think About ADHD Lance 24/7, 7 Days A Week, All Year Long. Anyway here goes.

  • Lance: [mockingly] “We need to focus.”
    • That’s a canon line like… ADHD Lance is real lmao
  • He tries his best to follow verbal directions, he really does, but it’s.. His short-term memory is honestly so fucked to hell lmao. Things just get switched around the moment someone says them.
    • Blue takes to recording things sort of?? Like Shiro and Allura will divvy out tasks at the beginning of a mission, and once Lance is in the cockpit Blue will pull up a miniscreen that has all his duties typed out for him. So he can read them and then know what he needs to do, all in the correct order.
    • When he completes an objective, he gets a checkmark!
  • Lance: I know I’m supposed to take my meds on a strict schedule but what if I… did Not do that… lol
    Hunk: Lance, that sounds like a really bad idea
    Lance: Nah it’ll be fine
    • Lance, thirty minutes later: Hunk, if you have ever loved me, you will kill me.
      Hunk: (rubbing Lance’s back) I know it’s bad, but it’ll pass
  • During his downtime, Lance can usually be found wearing Pidge’s headphones. He doesn’t even have any music playing, he just likes how they muffle out most sound. 
    • Noise-cancelling headphones kind of freak him out, he needs a pair that strikes that perfect balance of Blocking Out Most Noise while simultaneously allowing him to register stimuli.
  • Pidge eventually makes him a pair of blue headphones and Lance spends the rest of the day like :’)
  • He zones out very easily, so he tends to keep a timer on his person, just so he can be aware of.. himself, I guess. He hates losing track of time, because Lance is a very big ‘live in the moment’ kind of guy, so it’s frustrating when he misses out on life because of his ADHD.
  • Lance always needs some kind of background noise, just to keep him from being anxious. When he’s stressed but really needs to focus, he literally just listens to static/white background noise. It’s super helpful actually, I really recommend it.
  • Allura: Paladins, your training session for the day will be spent meditating (Lance gets up) on the bond between you and your- Lance?
    • Lance: (halfway out the door) lmao have fun guys!
  • Sometimes his brain just goes into hyperdrive so Lance will go to the training room and either run around until he gets tired or go on the Altean equivalent of a treadmill and pound out a few miles.
  • His ADHD ties into a lot of his insecurities. Lance has a big family, which means that everyone kind of has to be loud in order to be heard. So his hyperactiveness didn’t really stand out until he hit middle school, which was when he was finally diagnosed.
    • Lance is a smart kid, but he always feels like he’s two steps behind everyone else because of his ADHD. It slows him down, almost, even as it sends his mind into overtime. And that niggles away at him. 
    • A big problem is that Lance doesn’t really know his own limits… or he does, but he refuses to acknowledge them. He’s constantly comparing himself and his abilities against other people (Keith) and becomes frustrated when he can’t ‘keep up’ when in reality… They’re racing on two completely different tracks. He just refuses to accept that.

say what you want about klance but the reason i started watching voltron was because i saw the “we did it. we are a good team.” scene posted by a mutual and i was like, “oh sweet, there’s a canon gay couple.”

Kitten’s Got His Tongue | M | 01

Yoongi & Jimin | BTS | 5.5k Words | 01. 02. 03. 04. 05.

Yoongi orders Jimin and you from a hybrid companion service, but when he receives the two of you, he has no idea what to actually do with you.

Keep reading

taz fandom gf poll

yesterday evening i asked the taz fandom which girls from taz they would most like to date.

from 265 reblogs, here are the responses.

  1. Lup - 147 -  23.9%
  2. Killian - 96 - 15.6%
  3. Lucretia - 79 - 12.8%
  4. Carey - 59 - 9.6%
  5. Ren - 58 - 9.4%
  6. All - 46 - 7.4%
  7. Hurley - 31 - 5.0%
  8. Sloane - 29 - 4.7%
  9. Noelle - 23 - 3.7%
  10. Julia - 17 - 2.7%
  11. Jess - 7 - 1.14%
  12. Antonia - 5 - 0.81%
  13. Cassidy - 5 - 0.81%
  14. Troth - 3 - 0.48%
  15. Lydia - 3 - 0.48%
  16. Istus - 3 - 0.48%
  17. The Raven Queen - 2 - 0.32%
  18. Maureen - 1 - 0.09%

here is a pie chart.

i’m very bad at wrangling with excel.

findings of the study:

  1. people love lup. people really, really, really, love lup. there was even someone who mentioned they don’t listen to taz but still wants to date lup.
  2. our collective taste in women rocks.
  3. there was much talk of wanting to date BOTH killian and carey, although as you can see, more people said killian.
  4. i saw a lot of “lup and ___” - usually killian or lucretia.
  5. people often cast about for favorites and when the favorites kept piling up, just said “all of them.” hell yeah.
  6. some also just said “is this a trick question? all” which, yknow what? tru
  7. i did have one “none” response, but that was from someone saying “they’re all gay” (which is true) and “they’re too good for me” (which… awww buddy i believe in you, you have good opinions from what i know)
  8. the only ladies not mentioned are, to my knowledge: brogden, terra, paloma, hathaway redcheek-fangbattle, hecuba, petrilda, renee, sabine, and june & mavis (which is good, i didn’t have to block anybody).

here’s a couple of my favorite tags. they’re all a delight, but these gave me a chuckle.

conclusions of the study:

  1. you’re all gay.
Draco Malfoy Crush Headcanons

Masterlist


Gryffindor Reader

Originally posted by perfectfeelings


- Omg people would totally ship you two as the love/hate relationship and/or the sexual tension relationship

- Cliche, but start off as total rivals

- If you played Quiddich you would make it your top priority to always distract Draco

- Shameless teasing tho??

- “Hey Malfoy, nice ass”

- ///blushblushblush “Excuse me?!”

- “You heard me!”

- Shameless catcalling purposely in front of everyone including Snape and his friends

- But one day you are genuinely upset and on the verge of tears but you, being stubborn, refuse to cry in front of him

- “Didn’t you hear me?! Go away, Malfoy!”

- Offers you a handkerchief, an awkward hug, and sweets

- A messy, tear stained and shaky smile

- “Since when did you go soft, Malfoy?”

- “I should be asking you the same thing, (Last Name)

- So obviously you two are pretty close friends now

- He can basically trust you with anything so he comes to you when he has problems

- But both of you are extremely stubborn so usually the other person will have to confront the other about their notice in their change of attitude

- You having to confess first

- He’d totally try to confess but end up getting too nervous and backing away

- “Hey Malfoy, you be interested in going to Hogsmeade this weekend?”

-//smirksmirk “You wouldn’t be asking me out, would you?”

-”Pffftttt as if????”

- You totally were asking him out

- He said yes in the most teasing way with a signature smirk

- You were very proud of your relationship because there was no denying Draco was just hot

- But like he was a complete sweetie

- If you were sick he would always freak out and if he saw you were struggling in classes he would discreetly leave you his study notes in the most unexpected ways like “accidentally” mixing his 100% amazing notes up with your slightly pitiful ones

- And ugh he was just an amazing partner to have???


Slytherin Reader

Originally posted by tisbaylee


- Not gonna lie you two were already friends

- Like you would gang up on people you shared a hatred for always

- Sometimes people would even avoid you two in fear of being completely roasted™

- It was like “o shit here they come rUN BITCH RUN N Y O O M

 - But no seriously you two would diss whoever and whatever if they got on your nerves 

- And obviously he would ask you to the Yule Ball

-“You’re asking me, Malfoy…?”

-“Of course. Who else would I ask? Parkinson?”

- And like whenever the two of you would enter the ballroom all eyes would immediately just turn to you two

- Because lets face it, the two of you could stop traffic 

- You would both sneak off after some stuff had died down in a dark and empty corridor 

- The two of you would just be chatting by a windowsill whenever out of nowhere he would just kiss you

- You were like talking about class or something and he would just press his lips against yours

- And you just melted

- Because you could feel how shaky and nervous he was

- But he was so gentle

- And omg you cuties

- Tbh no one is surprised when you enter the Great Hall hand in hand

- Blaise catcalls

- Pansy snarls

- Crabbe and Goyle don’t really care 

- But you and Draco are too absorbed in the little world that has formed around you to notice

Ravenclaw Reader

Originally posted by lovershub

 

- The only reason he knew you is because you were the person who always just happened to score one or two points above him on every. single. assignment.

- Like he would be bragging in class about his grades when the teacher would speak up like 

-“Obviously I have the best test scores in here but that’s not surprise—“

-“aCTUALLY Mister Malfoy, Miss (Name) (Last Name) scored just one point above you…! So you’re wrong lol”

- And he would just be appalled

- And then he would basically track you down and discreetly ask about studying techniques

- And you’d just be like “So Mister “I scored one less point than someone” wants to hear about my studying techniques? I don’t think so, Second Place.”

- He’d do an unintentional dramatic gasp and like press an offended hand to his chest

- And you’d just walk away with the most smug smirk ever

- After that incident he’d badmouth you almost as much as he badmouthed Potter

- Almost

- Because after doing some “researching” (snooping) and learning more about you from observations and sources he’d find out that you’re actually really intriguing 

- And he might have had the smallest, tiniest crush on you

 - But he’d deny it of course

-the little bastard

- But like he actually finds the small things you do entertaining

- For example, he might have ‘accidentally’ showed up at the library every day you did and just happen to notice how you would play with your hair or doodle whenever you studied 

- One day, he discreetly bumped into you playing it off as he was too busy reading

- You decided not to tell him that his book was upside down

-“Oh, watch where you’re going… Anyways, if you’re here, mind helping me with this subject?”

-“Draco Malfoy? Asking for help? Who would have known?”

- But you did end up helping him 

- And after taking multiple deep breaths, he finally got the courage to ask you out

- And you told him “maybe if you can score higher than me on the next potions test”

-gUESS WHO STUDIED THEIR ASS OFF

-MALFOY DID


 Hufflepuff Reader

Originally posted by wellwailingwhale

 - Tbh he had no idea who you were

 - And honestly he didn’t even care

- But that all changed when this happened

- So you were focusing on anything other than him while walking down the hallway,

- And accidentally you bump into him

- All of your stuff falls to the ground

- And he just shoots you a nasty glare and continues walking

- You are simply picking up your things when you hear “Lousy Hufflepuffs. Can’t do anything. No wonder that Diggory died. As if a Hufflepuff is brave enough to enter that tournament and come out alive.”

- You stop dead in your tracks. “What did you just say..?”

- He turns back to you with a scoff 

- You run up in front of him and get in his face. “What the hell did you just say?! Tell me!” 

-”I said that all of you Hufflepuffs are weak and pathetic. Diggory never had what it took to enter the-”

- But he was cut off by a punch to the face. His nose was bleeding

-”Don’t you ever start saying shit like that when you, yourself, will never be better than Cedric! At his worst, he is still better than you at your best. Maybe you should think about this before speaking unless you want to be bloodied by a “lousy” Hufflepuff again.”

- He is left in sh o ck

- From then on, whenever he sees you his entire face goes red and he hides himself

- Because maybe your courage and great left hook made him form a crush

-somehow

- He leaves a note on your desk which is from “your secret admirer” (cause he’s cheesy like that) telling you to meet him outside at night

- Your first reaction when you see him is not a positive one

- He explains that he only said that about Diggory is because he tries to look impressive in front of his friends (Which isn’t a lie) and that he sincerely apologizes and mourns for your House’s loss

- After some coaxing, he is forgiven 

- You sit and chat for a while and you are pleasantly surprised when you find out he’s actually pretty cool

-At the end of the night, he asks you on a date

- And with a hesitant yet bright smile, you accept

ummm … why was this video so cute??? why was phil offering up nostalgic stories from his childhood every 3 minutes? why were they so fond of the family bonding time? of picking childrens clothing for dab???? ive not felt true emotions during a sims vid in so long??????? ? anyway here r some thoughts:

  • why did they try to make bowling strike noises for 30 actual whole seconds
  • phil dragging dan for not being able to read the word ‘mirage.’ good
  • the fact that phil kinda sorta equated the connotations of ’mate’ and ‘friend’ with ‘partner’ gave me heart palpitations ahhhhh partner is legit my fav word for what dnp are to each other and to hear it used in the same context as phil’s cheeky use of friend/mate was v affirming
  • apparently a typical dad move, according to phil, is stealing your child’s electronics. when phil got his first iPhone his dad took it and put angry birds on it? for some reason this is vital information to me
  • letting your child have cake on the bed is terrible parenting. both of them agree
  • when phil was a kid he had a toy where you rubbed its back and sparks came out. uhhh cute and also concerning
  • phil singing ‘fireman dan’ made me giggle and simultaneously forced me to reminisce on the fireman pic from their ‘dan and phil go to work’ calendar
  • the wholeeeeee bit where they’re looking through dab’s clothing choices made my heart melt. they are so supportive of eccentric fashion choices and they’re def going to be the dads that let their kids pick out their own clothes and support their choices and their individuality no matter what
  • omg 4:51 and phil saying, ‘you can make references that are old dan’ holy shit this bit. once again i love phil not taking dan’s shit and i love how fucking synchronized that god damn joke noise they make is, like they somehow made them at nearly the exact same microsecond??? and i have so many thoughts about this bc they both tend to make that noise when the other messes up or says something wrong or has a word flub of some sort, and it has always struck me as being something they use to dilute the awkwardness of that kind of misspeak??? like to take the attention away from the misspeak itself and draw each other out of the awkwardness of that moment by making each other laugh w this weird goose noise instead?? which is just??? fucking cute? i feel like in this instance the applicability was that dan didn’t have a retort to phil when phil stood up for himself so instead of just staying awkwardly silent he makes this goose noise (v slightly before phil does) as a way of being like lol this is awk i have nothing to say pls help me here and phil v instinctively/automatically follows as a way of joining in and being like it’s all good, you’re good, this is chill, pls don’t feel awk for not coming up w a witty response, and look now we’re laughing!!! and that’s the purpose that noise generally always serves them?? at least it seems that way to me, but idk like obvi i have no real basis for understanding exactly what the origin and meaning of this reflex is for them, this is sort of just how it seems from the many instances we’ve seen of them doing this. either way overall it’s just such a cute and  warm lil thing they do bc its so obvi instinctive at this point and a shared gesture that makes them laugh and i love it
  • phil wasn’t allowed ripped/distressed jeans when he was younger. those traditionalist lesters staying true to their colors
  • dan thinks phil could be a stylist wow that is like the height of praise coming from the dark prince of fashion himself
  • dan thinks its cute when dab is in the parental bed while phil yells ‘get out’ hahahaha
  • phil used to talk to the monster under his bed bc of course he did
  • ok omg the whole bit starting at 9:30. holy shit y’all. i’m baffled. they’re having what seems like a v benign convo about sleepovers during their youth and talking about the frustrations of having to sleep on the floor and dan says “the older you get, the more you’re like what the hell i’m so uncomfortable i wish i was just asleep right now.” and then wATCH HIM from 9:38 to 9:42 like what is he doing why did he follow up that contextually very chill statement with that intense stare into the camera and pointed sip of his water I’m SO confused. this immediately made me think about double meanings to that statement and the main thing that occurred to me was that it was an allusion to their separate beds,, that the older you get the more you value comfort when you’re sleeping over the fun of having a “sleepover with your friend” and one possible fix for that is sleeping in a separate bed to your “””friend”””???? idk??? am v open to other interpretations tho i have no idea, and like of course maybe dan is just being inadvertently cheeky but idk that jst seemed like SUCH an intentional stare and i am going to be kept up at night wondering what it all MEANS
  • dank brekkerini dan’s right i want to fight him for that
  • phil’s grandma used to cut up apples and sprinkled sugar on them depending on the activities they were doing wow why is his whole family quite literally the sweetest
  • phil correcting dan by pointing out that you could always cook a gourmet meal and dan’s only available response being “well … shut up” wow fucking shots fired
  • dan is incensed at the wasted breakfast bar. why is dan literally obsessed w breakfast bars
  • 12:56 another synchronized moment when they both say brayden in an obnoxious attempt at an american accent
  • i love that they are both immediately in agreement that the only reason to go to a bowling alley would be to play on the ddr machine fuckin nerds
  • martyn worked as a mascot at a bowling alley for his work experience prime lester family trivs. also cute ass mental image
  • their shared reflection about bowling with the bumpers up and the dumb toxic masculinity of teenage boys fuCK YES
  • editing mistake numero uno: they overlaid a backing track for tabitha’s bowling turn starting at 14:27 but then kept the music in for like a full THREE AND A HALF minutes omg (it plays on repeat until 17:57 lmao i was ready to click out of the video it was so annoying)
  • editing mistake numero dos: they do the exACT SAME THING with yet another backing track starting at 19:57 and continuing for like one min this time ugh omg (tbh its kind of fun to see such a blatant reminder that they’re just human beings who were either v jet lagged or v distracted by their fam vacay while editing this)

this video was good. i’m gonna go shower and continue to be haunted by that fucking sleepover comment and dan’s stare. good night 

(sims #40)

anonymous asked:

This isn't really Director Sanvers related, but... Danvers sisters bodyswapping fic. Just think of the hilarity!

I agree ;)


She still got giddy sometimes. Waking up to Maggie, sometimes clothed, most times not, was often the highlight of her day. Her mind slowly rising from the fog of sleep, with the warmth of her favorite detective koala wrapped around her, sharing a pillow that smelled of citrus and cherry shampoos, that was the best way to begin her day. Alex paused to remember the delicious feeling of being awoken yesterday by Maggie’s lips and conceded that koala!Maggie was, maybe, the second best way to wake up.

It was like a dream, the happiness she felt knowing that there was someone out there for her, that she wasn’t broken, that she was just looking in all the wrong places and all the wrong faces (literally). Alex pulled herself closer, burying her face into hair that smelled of…

Lemongrass?

That was weird.

Alex opened one eye to find her face buried in hair that held none of the caramel streaks she was accustomed to, with an entirely different scent. She pulled back a bit, squinting in the dim light of early morning.

Going to bed with Maggie and waking up with her? That was a dream.

Going to bed with Maggie and waking up with Lena Luthor? That was a nightmare.

Alex screamed and threw herself backwards off the bed, dragging the sheets with her. She was nothing more than a tangled mess on the floor when Luthor leaned over the bed, brushing the sleep from her decidedly not Maggie-brown eyes. She looked around in confusion, not seeing anything wrong.

“Kara, darling? Did you have another nightmare?”

What the hell?

“What the hell?” Alex repeated out loud.

“Kara?”’

Alex scrambled to her feet, shucking free of the sheets and almost falling over again. “How the hell did I get here?”

Luthor frowned. “Through the balcony, darling. Did you hit your head during the fight last night? You came in so late you didn’t even change… can you hit your head and hurt it?”

Alex looked down. The crest of the House of El adorned her chest. The only things missing from the suit were the cape and the boots. “What the hell?

Lena shifts to sit up, brow still furrowed. She studied Alex, eyes dragging along each limb, cataloging each frantic movement as Alex tried to figure out what the hell was going on. She sprang for the bedside table, and before Alex stopped her internal freakout, Lena had a gun in her hands and shot off.

Thankfully, it bounced off.

“Luthor, what the hell?

“Who are you and how did you get in my girlfriend’s body?”

Girlfriend?!

“What did you do to Kara?”

“You sleep with a gun and my sister?

“You try getting almost assassinated every– wait, did you say sister?”

Alex turned to look in the mirror. Just what I was afraid of. Blond hair, blue eyes, and all of Alex’s worst nightmares staring back at her. “How the fuck did we switch consciousness while asleep?”

“A… Agent Danvers?

Alex turned to face the other woman, feeling an unfamiliar heat behind her eyes–her sister’s eyes.

Wait, fuck, can’t fry Kara’s girlfriend just because Kara never told me they were dating.

“How long have you and Kara been-” Alex waved her hand between them, “-a thing?”

“It’s recent. She was trying to figure out a way to tell you.”

“That she’s a lesbian?”

“Bi, I think, is what she’s settled on, yes. But also that she’s exploring that… with me.”

Alex frowned. “Which part did she think I’d be upset about?”

Lena fiddled with the gun in her hands, still wrapped in the one sheet Alex didn’t run off with. Thankfully, she had put the safety back on. “Both, I think.”

Alex tilted her, Kara’s, head back and laughed. She laughed, and laughed, and laughed so hard she basically collapsed in a heap on the floor. Lena looked rather concerned by the time Alex could talk again. “Okay, but, the first one I thought she knew, what with how she went on and on about Lucy when they met–”

“Who’s Lucy?” Lena growled.

“–the second, yeah, that’s a concern, but she talks about you even more than she ever did Lucy, and I’m a little mad that she didn’t tell me, she always tells me–”

“Who. Is. Lucy.”

“–but mostly I think I’m okay with it, because I just remembered Maggie and I weren’t wearing clothes last night and now Kara gets to stumble through apologizing that she’s seen my girlfriend naked.”

She’s what?!