Honestly, asking someone who is asexual or aromantic, if their sex or romance repulsion was “because of abuse” is the rudest and more insane invasion of privacy I have ever seen and experienced.
That’s like Bill coming out as gay, and the first question that pops out of Suzy’s mouth is, “so…like…did your mom beat you? is that why you don’t like women?”
Not only is that so rude and so hurtful, it makes me and other asexual feel like actual freaks of nature (because yes, that is what you are implying with your statement).
Sex and romance are great things for many people, but please understand that it is not for everyone.
By placing sex and romance attraction as this weird norm, asexuals become circus freaks. It’s not okay. It never will be okay.
By enforcing sex and romance attraction (both same sex and not), as a “thing that makes us human”, where the hell do you think that leaves us?
By saying things like that, we’re being told we aren’t even human enough.