what on earth shall i do

  • “It’s been raining for days.”
  • “Looks like the rainy season is finally here.”
  • “Shall I put on a pot of tea?”
  • “Turn up the heat/put another log on the fire, the rain brought a chill.”
  • “Close the window, you’ll ruin the flooring!”
  • “You’re sopping wet.”
  • “What on earth were you doing out there?”
  • “Fine, you can come in, but take off your shoes.”
  • “I don’t need you tracking mud everywhere.”
  • “The sound of rain is so nice.”
  • “You’re going out? In this?”
  • “You can’t go out there, it’s pouring down rain!”
  • “I like the rain and all, but being stuck inside is so boring.”
  • “The day would be a lot less boring if you learned how to sit still.”
  • “I cannot believe we’re stuck in this!”
  • “Maybe we should find somewhere to take cover until it stops.”
  • “Does it ever stop raining here?”
  • “Oh no! The rain ruined our picnic.”
  • “Want to go for a walk in the rain?”
  • “Can I have a blanket?”
  • “Sorry to intrude. This rain came out of nowhere.”
  • “Look at the sky! The lightning is insane.”
  • “It’s getting pretty intense out there.”
  • “A rainy day, warm blankets, a cup of tea, and a book to tie it all together.”
  • “Let’s go for a walk in the rain.”
  • “Here, this should warm you up.”
  • “Come in here before you catch a cold.”
  • “Ugh, that’s just a silly old wives’ tale.”
  • “I pity the poor souls caught out in this.”
  • “Aren’t there any books to read?”
  • “Rains smells so different in the city.”
  • “The rain smells better in the countryside.”
  • “Nothing like the sound of rain to go with a good book.”
  • “Careful, the tea is still hot.”
  • -draws on the fogged up windows-
  • -Flips loudly through book-
  • -sighs- “It’s so cozy in here.”
How to Summon a Guardian

This is a spell I wrote in order to invoke and annoying a guardian for my home.

What you’ll need:
• A statue or some form to appoint as your guardian
• A way to represent each element; can be color coded candles or other forms. I chose the following: dragon’s blood incense for protection as Air, a red candle for Fire, a chalice of water for Water, and a Tiger’s Eye crystal for protection as Earth

Place what you have chosen to represent the elements in their corresponding cardinal points.
Place your Guardian in the center.

Recite, chant, internalize, or express the following however you choose:

Fire, Water, Air and Earth
Protect what’s in this home and hearth
As I appoint this Guardian to do my work.

Watch over all who come;
Let harm be done to none.
Protective Spirit watch over here;
Banish Pain, erase all Fear.
Protect this Home and all I love,
Evil you shall dispose of.
O, Protective Guardian, hear my plea!
As I will it, it shall be.

—————————————————–

You may choose to take a few moments to meditate and focus your energy into your guardian. I chose to anoint mine with my saliva as a form of breathing life into him.

When the spell is complete, place your Guardian someplace they can easily watch over you.


spell written by Izzie (tarot-cards-and-tea)

Feel free to reblog for reference.

levy-anakin  asked:

Oo so I was thinking maybe Lance has a ton of weird knowledge because he loves reading books about different things (boats, building, animals/plants). So one day the gang is on a mission and someone gets a bomb strapped to them or there is just a bomb they need to defuse. Everyone is freaking out and trying to think. Lance gets near it and everyone just panics thinking he'll set it off, yelling/langst, then Lance defused it and everyone is in awe or something. I just love your blog!!

oh my god I’m so happy to hear that! I’m glad you enjoy my blog so much!

if it’s ok with you, I’m gonna do more of an overall plot ( and maybe mix in my own headcanons):

so pretty much, Lance grew up in an all Cuban house, he never learned English because he never needed to. he grew up helping his mama around the house or helping his father on his fishing boat.

that’s where Lance first fell in love with the stars. he would ask his dad all the time about them and the constellations they created. his father did his very best to fuel Lance’s interests, but they lived on a very low incomes, and alot of the time Lance didn’t get alot of stuff. he sometimes would skip meals and give hem to his younger siblings so that way they didn’t grow hungry. Lance didn’t get alot of books growing up, and any of the books about space were in English. when he heard about the Garrison, he knew he had to join. only problem was that it was in America, and Lance didn’t know English at all.

so Lance would go to the old library and pick up any English book he could get his hands on. childern’s books, worker manuals, how-to books, he read them all. he would learn both the English language as well as learn how to do anything the books were talking about. another way Lance learned English was watching American shows, he mostly stuck with historical or informational shows. learning how they talked and pronounced the words he’s red over time and time again. (the library only has a certain amount of English books, so he would reread he same ones over and over again) he also learned interesting facts about American history, or watch how to fix a car, he picked it all up.

when he finally applied to the Garrison, he was a ball of nerves. his English wasn’t the best, and his accent heavy in his voice as he sounds out different English words. but you can imagine how proud his family was when Lance didn’t just get accepted, but got a full ride scholarship as well. he promised to keep u his studies and that he wont let them down.

when he does get the Garrison, he realizes how bad his spoken English is compared to everyone else. many time he’ll say the wrong word or forget the English word entirely, and many chalk him up to being the class clown, thinking that he’s doing it on purpose. they don’t realize how much it hurts Lance whenever one of the teachers or another student calls him out for messing up a word or saying the wrong thing. Lance will spend all his time either in the simulation room or in the library, reading over and over different books about the most random of things, trying to both understand the lessons he was just taught as well as broadening his knowledge of the English language. it’s in the library that he met Hunk, and they both gain the first real friend at the Garrison.

now fast forward to the team meeting, and them releasing Allura and Coran, and forming Voltron and what not. Lance missing home so much because he misses his family, and wondering how they’re doing. he misses being able to speak his first Language, he misses calling up his brothers and talking to them explaining complex math and engineering that he learned that day, knowing how much his older brother loves talking about that kind of stuff.

every once in a while, Lance will slip up with his English and it’ll get either a couple of laughs or some scowls, the team thinking that he’s trying to mess around and pull jokes in very serious moments when really he just messed up and didn’t know the right word. Lance will do what he always does when he feels like he’s letting down everyone around him. he goes to the library. it took him awhile to find it, and everything was in Altean, but Lance didn’t mind. he enjoys learning languages and sets to work figuring out the Altean language.

then, some time later, during one to the training exercises, Allura decides to change things up a bit and do a team building exercise. she sets up a bomb (not a real one, that would be crazy) but she says its an old child’s game and while it doesn’t explode, it will make quite the mess if they don’t disarm it in time.

so everyone is talking, trying to figure out how to disarm the bomb, and every time Lance tries to add to the conversation, he gets talked over or ignored. Lance decides to look over the device, trying to recognize anything about it, or any of the words look familiar.  lance remembers about reading one of the books back at the Garrison about how to disarm a bomb (how it got into a space school, he doesn’t really know) and it looks to have the same basic design as one of them. all he really needs is to figure out which wire is the one to cut.

it seems that the others stopped talking at that time to seeing Lance hovering over the device with a pair of pliers, to which they freak out and pull him away, and right when he figured out which wire to cut, and chastise him for trying to do disarm the bomb without them, and some of the comments come off more rude than others and they even put him in a ‘time out zone’ for trying to eal with something very dangerous and sensitive, but they just didn’t want Lance to get hurt because he messed around with it. Lance merely stands back up and walks back over to the bomb, and picking out the right wires, he cuts them, to the teams horror, they brace for their gooey demise.

but nothing happens. the team is amazed that Lance actually defused the bomb. and of course they all crowd around Lance, asking how he did that and why he didn’t tell them he could do it and getting a few cheers of congratulations (mostly from Hunk) lance explains that he would read alot of books and informational shows to understand the English Language, and one of those books was about how to disarm a bomb. of course the others are surprised that English isn’t his first language (they assumed it was since he was at the Garrison) and he continues to explain that when he messes up his words,its not usually on purpose and that he honestly didn’t know the word in English. everyone apologizes about always getting on him when they thought he was joking, and he easily forgives them. afterwards, Shiro even comes up to Lance and personally apologizes about not figuring it out sooner, since he also struggled with learning English when he and his family moved to America. (cue bonding moment!)

and a little extra silliness on the side~

Lance knowing just the weirdest stuff about history, just odd tidbits that he picked u from those history shows, and just spouting them out at the most random of times.

“hey Lance, can you pass me that wrench?”

“did you know that in the 1700s, the french were scared of potatoes.”

“what? dude, that has nothing to do with getting the wrench! why on Earth would you say- you know what, screw it, why were the french scared of potatoes?!”

i know this wasn’t really angsty , but i hope you like it anyways! thank you so much for the ask!

A wise decision

Synopsis: A lot has changed on Earth since King Loki’s reign fell upon its people. Humans lost their beloved ones to the war, they lost their homes to chaos and now, they are forced to plunder and cheat to keep themselves alive. Being among those hopeless citizens of New York, you fight for your food and survival every day anew. That is until one day, you act too unwary and get caught, wrangling you an audience with the God of Mischief himself, who then comes up with a rather… unique punishment for your iniquity.

Pairing: Loki x Reader
Rating: M
Chapter: 1/1 (OneShot)
Words: 4731
Warnings:
smut, theft, blackmailing, submission, prostitution… kind of

Read it on AO3!

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Torture sentence starters
  • “Oh god.. Oh please, god, no!”
  • “Please… Please..! I’ll do anything..!!”
  • “P-please.. Please don’t..”
  • “Anything but that.. Please, please! Stop!”
  • “Stop? Why on earth would I do a thing like that for?”
  • “We’re having so much fun!”
  • “We’ll have so much fun, you and I…”
  • “Look at the new toy I got for us to play with!”
  • “Shut up! Shut up!!”
  • “Oh please.. Like I haven’t heard that one before…”
  • “If I had a nickel for every time someone begged me to stop… I’d be fucking rich.”
  • “Ooh, look at that. Look at all the blood. Amazing, isn’t it?”
  • “Let’s crack open the hood and see what’s underneath, shall we?”
  • “You know what I love more than agonized screaming? The sound of people choking on their own blood. Very satisfying.”
  • “If you beg, I might just stop… Maybe. But only if you’re sincere.”
  • “Beg me, you stupid whore! Beg me to stop! Come on!!”
  • “Go ahead – beg for forgiveness. God’s the only friend you’ve got down here. ”
  • “Shut up or I’ll wrap your intestines around your throat like a scarf.”
  • “Ha ha! I love it when they scream!”
  • “Keep going… I love the sound of your voice.”
  • “Stop praying! There is no God here.”
  • “Shut the fuck up!!”
  • “Let’s play a game, shall we? It’s called, ‘how many of your organs can I remove before you die?’“
  • “Alright, here’s the deal… Since you scream every time you see me – let’s just remove your eyes, hm?”
  • “Has anyone ever told you how good you look in red?”
  • “Beautiful… Absolutely beautiful…”
  • “I’m not going to kill you… But I’m going to make you wish I would.”
  • “This is what you get! This is what you get for hurting me!”
  • “Do you like rats? I hope so. Because we’re going to play a little game with one that involves your stomach, a container, and an open flame.”
  • “Have you ever heard of abacination?”
  • “You’ve got cavities back there, you know. Why don’t remove those pesky teeth for you, hm?”
  • “Wake up! Can’t have you passing out on me.”
  • “I won’t scream.”
  • “I won’t tell you anything.”
  • “There’s no way I’m gonna tell you shit.”
  • “By the time anyone finds your body, they won’t be able to identify it.”
  • “No one is coming for you.”
  • “You won’t get away with this!”
  • “People will notice! They’ll look for me!”
  • “Stop, oh god, please! Please stop.. The pain..!”
  • “You’re insane!”
  • “Don’t worry. I know what I’m doing – I’ve got a medical degree, you know.”
  • “Shh, don’t cry. Don’t cry.”
  • “No tears now, okay? Everything will soon be over.”
  • “Stop! Please, stop! I’ll tell you anything! Just stop!”
  • “Tell me – how does this feel?”
  • “I hate you! Oh god, I hate you!”
  • “Fuck you!”
  • “Fuck off!”
  • “Oh, what a mess you’ve made…”
  • “You look like a mess.”
  • “Chin up, kid. It’ll be over soon enough.”
  • “I’m just going to borrow a few fingers, okay?”
  • “Could you lend me a ‘hand’? Yes? Oh good. I was planning on taking it anyway.”
  • “Shut up, I’m not going to kill you. You don’t deserve that kind of mercy.”
  • “You know why you’re here.”
  • “Own up to what you’ve done and maybe you’ll leave here alive!”
  • “What the fuck is wrong with you!?!”
  • “Please! Someone help! Anyone! Oh god.. PLEASE!”
  • “Not that – anything but that! P-please! PLEASE, NO!”
  • “Let me go. Please.. Please let me go…”
  • “I’ll tell you anything you want! Just please, please stop!”
  • “I’m not going to break that easy.”
Normal Horoscope:

Aries: Look back and think “What have I learned?” This insight can be anywhere from precious to lifesaving to hilarious.

Taurus: Violence is the answer. If your problem is metaphorical, you need metaphorical violence. Understand?

Gemini: Likely the most complicated math you will ever do is splitting the check, but don’t let that stop you. Artillery needs calculus and you shall paint the earth with plunging fire.

Cancer: The stars say you need more hexagons in your life. Get six sided my friend.

Leo: Those who do not walk the path of martial self-discipline will never know the feeling of splitting a table in half with a single blow. Badass.

Virgo: The ink is permanent but the canvas is endless. Draw dicks to your hearts content, there is always enough space for other things.

Libra: Swearing implies power and control. There are times when asserting your power and control is not needed and now you’re banned from Joann’s Fabric.

Scorpio: Milk chocolate is for the weak. 

Ophiuchus: Bright colors indicate poison, that a single touch can kill. Gummy candy is a great treachery. 

Sagittarius: The more you desire an answer, the less likely you are to notice that nobody asked a question. Rest.

Capricorn: Some things really are your fault. Abolish property law and socialize guilt.

Aquarius: Your time at art school is well spent. Even the times you weren’t legally allowed to be there.

Pisces: Space is a social construct. The physical distance between two points is an illusion we have already reached glorious singularity and it is nice to cuddle.

Percy's Cuddle Therapy
  • Annabeth: *barges into the Poseidon cabin*
  • Percy: Um. Annabeth, It's one in the morning. What are you doing in my cabin?
  • Annabeth: I had a dream.
  • Percy: Let me guess, it was about——
  • Annabeth: About spiders.
  • Percy: I'm not going to get any more sleep tonight, am I?
  • Annabeth: Nope.
  • Percy: Then I shall cuddle you until the sun rises and burns all the spider flesh deep into the earth.
  • Annabeth: I love you.
  • *cuddles*
What God has to say about fear and worry:

2 Timothy 1:7
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

Anxiety feels like a natural reaction in the more troubling seasons of life but don’t fall into the trap of believing that it’s unavoidable. The thing is, even when things are at their darkest, God is still sovereign and He is still good.
When you’re tempted to give into discouragement or worry, remember that He promised in His word to never leave you or forsake you. There are not certain periods He designates in your life as times for worry. He always intends for there to be peace for His children. Lean on Him in the hard times and be encouraged that He works all things together for the good of those who love Him.

He is with you:

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Psalm 23:4
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.


Psalm 91:1-7
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.  I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust.” Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the perilous pestilence. He shall cover you with His feathers,
and under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and buckler. You shall not be afraid of the terror by night, nor of the arrow that flies by day,nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness, nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday. A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand; but it shall not come near you.


Psalm 121:1-2
I will lift up my eyes to the hills— From whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.


Isaiah 43:2
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.

Psalm 34:4
I sought the Lord, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.


He will provide for your needs:

1 Peter 5:6-7
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because He cares for you.

Matthew 6:25-34
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin.Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.


Jeremiah 49:11
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.


Philippians 4:19
But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

Proverbs 29:25
The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord shall be safe.

He gives peace in the midst of turmoil:
Philippians 4:6-7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

Psalm 55:22
Cast your burden on the Lord, and He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.

Isaiah 26:3
You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.

Proverbs 3:21-24
My son, let them not depart from your eyes— keep sound wisdom and discretion; So they will be life to your soul and grace to your neck. Then you will walk safely in your way, and your foot will not stumble. When you lie down, you will not be afraid; Yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet.


No enemy poses a challenge for Him:
Psalm 27:1
The Lord is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid?

Romans 8:31
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

Psalm 118:6
The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?


Hebrews 13:5-6
Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.

Jeremiah 32:17
Ah, Lord God! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. There is nothing too hard for You.

Sons of a Thunder Storm (Part Three)

Sons of a thunderstorm Masterlist

Reader x Ragnarssons’


The evening after work had been uneventful in comparison to the one before. Ubbe and Hvitserk cooked and surprisingly managed to keep the mess to the kitchen and that was easily cleaned up.

Ivar, with Hvitserk’s help, spent most of the time rearranging the house so he could move around easier which you didn’t min. Sigurd however found his chosen job of filling, the now three emergency jars, a little harder when Ivar would zip around the corner and see how many jars he could knock over.

Unfortunately the peace couldn’t last and when you said you were going to bed you’d expected them to do what they had the night before and sleep any where they felt like. “Um… hello?” You muttered when Ubbe and Hvitserk burst into your room, stripped down from their armour, chuckling to themselves.

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  • Dean: Well...last night on earth...what shall we do? ;)
  • Castiel: We should drink. A lot.
  • Dean: And?
  • Castiel: Then drink more
  • Dean: Yeah but, I mean there's other things that we could be doing
  • Castiel: Like....say goodbye??
  • Eileen: *To Sam* They're not going to try to stop it?
  • Sam: Yeah, yeah sure. It's okay they do this like once a year
  • Eileen: Okay...want to hang out in your room? :)
  • Sam: Yes! *Eileen and Sam run off*
  • Dean: I mean like, you wouldn't have to come with
  • Castiel: Well I'll go with you anyway
  • Dean: But you don't have to
  • Castiel: Well I'm going to, stop arguing with me!
  • Dean: Oh go play your stupid harp
  • Castiel: I DON'T HAVE A HARP!!
Cold Hearted (Prince AU) Part 6

Originally posted by sugaglos

Requests are closed!

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8,  Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20

Word Count: 6559

Warnings: Blood, Smut (in later parts)

Jaebum sat on his bed and untied his boots. He pulled off his jacket and undid the cuff links of his shirt, going through the simplistic motions of getting ready for bed as he did every night.

He wasn’t used to these feelings. He didn’t consider himself as very emotional, war tended to favour the more stoic man; someone who did not get shaken by death or get jerked around by feelings.

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AU List

Oh. my. god. Huge ass AU list done with byrdboiv

Part 1 | Part 2

AUSTRALIAN HIGH SKOOL LUV AFFAIR AU

  • ‘I’m a student teacher at your school and you’re a senior who keeps on trying to ask me out in your free periods – I mean, I would because you’re only younger than me by like, five years ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM, and you’re kind of totally my type? But hey, I’ve got to keep some sense of professionalism’ AU
  • ‘I’m a basketball coach in the year above you from your brother/sister school, and you’re that kid who can’t ball for shit, has friends in the team I’m coaching, and told me that I was really short and had really pretty eyes, you’re distracting me my team, fight me in the PIT, motherfucker’ AU
  • ‘I’m part of the IT at the school you work at, and you’re a drama teacher – you keep asking me for help with the sound and lighting even though we both know that’s the job for the deputy principal’s sound and lighting kids’ AU
  • ‘I’m your best bro and you’re my best bro, we used to have broners for each other but now I have a romantic boner for you, bro, and I don’t know about you. I’m sorry, bro. All the homo’ AU
  • ‘I’m in your Mathematics class and you sit next to me, whispering words of encouragement after my teacher verbally bodyslams me for my epic math fails’ AU
  • ‘I’m a 500% troublemaker and you’re a 500% goody two-shoes and we’re both in the Student Representative Council – who will come out on top? (Not in the sexual way, oh my God is this really happening I had no idea you had it in you, we’re both minors but I don’t think either of us could care less; so much for you being good.)’ AU
  • ‘I’m really hungry and I forgot my lunch and I have no money to buy food at the canteen, and you just passed me a $10 bill, I am 10000% willing to become you sex slave right now, bless the ground you walk on, O Benevolent One’ AU
  • ‘I’m walking past the basketball courts and you’re just lying in the centre of the courts. Staring into the sky. I’m going to join you’ AU
  • ‘I’m in your P.E. class and you’ve been doing a plank for 5 solid minutes, are you an Olympian or something??’ AU
  • ‘I’m a VA student and I fucking hate basketball to the nth degree but my teacher wants me to paint a basketball hoop and backboard for my assignment and fuckyou you’re playing on my reference, move aside bitch’ AU
  • ‘I do Latin and so do you, but you’re in a year below me and ask me for help a lot because your pronunciation may be great but your grammar is not’ AU
  • ‘I’m working part-time at a fast food joint and holy fuck, you and your friends just came to order stuff and oh no I have this huge fat crush on you because you’re always so nice to everyone and to me, I hope you don’t notice the fear in my Customer Service Smile™’ AU
  • ‘I do notifications over the PA every morning and you like my voice??? You want to ask me out for coffee????? Like, right now?????? School has already started???????You’re in Year 9 and I’m in Year 11 and I do NOT want you to skip school just for this?????????????’ AU
  • ‘We’re both in a school volleyball team and we’re the only ones not here for the gay volleyball anime (well, maybe)’ AU
  • ‘We’re both in a school basketball team and we’re the only ones not here for that one gay basketball anime (well, not really)’ AU
  • ‘We’re both in the same swimming squad and hell yeah are we here for the gay swimming anime’ AU
  • ‘I’m a VA student and you’ve been bringing me food for the past month after school when I’ve been working on my artwork, even though we’re in brother/sister schools and I only really get to talk to you at our interschool vocals club and/or on Facebook (which is really rare, to be honest), I really need to pay you back, does my eternal love and devotion (or dedication of my artwork to you) suffice?’ AU
  • ‘We’re married teachers in the Science faculty and the students keep on making jokes about us having chemistry, please bury me’ AU
  • ‘I have a TAFE account and you’re begging me for it – are you really willing to give me what you’re offering, I mean, an entire cake, your virginity and your first born child is not something that should be bartered for something you could Google at home’ AU
  • ‘We just snuck into the movies together because our friends dared us to get in, watch a movie and get back out without getting caught, hell yeah, this isn’t a date by the way what are you saying, fuck, this movie’s sad, fuck, I’m not crying, fuck, you’re holding me in your arms and it feels right, fUCK’ AU
  • ‘I’m part of the IT at the school you work at, and you’re a drama teacher – you keep asking me for help with the sound and lighting even though we both know that’s the job for the deputy principal’s sound and lighting kids’ AU
  • ‘I’m a basketball coach in the year above you from your brother/sister school, and you’re that kid who can’t ball for shit, has friends in the team I’m coaching, and told me that I was really short and had really pretty eyes, you’re distracting me my team, fight me in the PIT, motherfucker’ AU
  • ‘I’m a student teacher at your school and you’re a senior who keeps on trying to ask me out in your free periods – I mean, I would because you’re only younger than me by like, five years ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM, and you’re kind of totally my type? But hey, I’ve got to keep some sense of professionalism’ AU
  • ‘Your notes are the most beautiful thing my eyes have ever been graced with, and what the fuck, how can you even do this when our history teacher talks rapid-fire’ AU
  • ‘THE FUCKER THAT’S BEEN BLASTING WHITNEY HOUSTIN IN THE MUSIC ROOM, STOP’ AU
  • ‘I leaned over your shoulder to see the creative writing piece you’ve been working on for the past hour, and oh my gosh????? You’re that writer in the school magazine with the mysterious alias, and I admire you so much???? Did you sell your soul to the devil to reach that level of eloquence tell me your sECRET’ AU


OCCUPATIONS/JOBS AU

Fast Food Outlet

  • I work at McDonalds and you’re the fuckface who tries to order my number with a 24pck of chicken nuggets and a large strawberry sundae every single fucking time (I mean, I’d give you my number if you bought a chocolate sundae instead, strawberry is wrong)’
  • I work at KFC, why in the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour, did you buy six 450ml servings of mash potato, sit down at a table close by, open each of them up and drink them all.
  • I’m a Domino’s Pizza deliveryman and you just bought 20 pizzas, there’s not even a party at your house? Are you going to eat this all yourself in one go? Are you just bulk buying so you can reheat it later and not bother calling us up again? Pizza’s way better fres– fuck, you’re crying, what do I do, they didn’t teach me this in my training.
  • I’m working part-time at a fast food joint and holy fuck, you and your friends just came to order stuff and oh no I have this huge fat crush on you because you’re always so nice to everyone and to me, I hope you don’t notice the fear in my Customer Service Smile™.
  • ‘As an employee, I shouldn’t be saying this, but it is NOT nutritionally acceptable to eat here every day. Drop by after my shift ends and I’ll cook you some real food’ AU


Convenience/Greengrocer store AU


  • ‘I’m a convenience store owner and you’re asking me whether the $2 or $3 noodles are better, I like both of them, what do I say, you’re looking at me with bigass puppydog eyes, I am fucked’ AU
  • ‘I’m your local greengrocer’s cashier and you’ve been staring at the tomatoes for over 15 minutes now, Jimmy, hold the register’ AU
  • ‘Why on earth are you holding that fruit to your ear like you can hear the fucking sea or something’ AU


Technological Store AU

  • ‘I work in JB-HiFi and you come in and ask me if I could help you find your friend who is a) missing and b) has a huge thirst for Kanye West and Jay-Z, shall we go to the CDs? They might be in the Rap genre section…’ AU
  • ‘How did you manage to fuck this up so badly’ AU


Dentist AU

  • ‘I think you look very attractive but there’s not much dignity I can muster when you’re holding my mouth open with these goddamn contraptions from hell and my mouth’s starting to fill with saliva’ AU
  • ‘I’m a dental assistant and you’re really cute, even with a bajillion black stains and mildly bad breath’ AU
  • ‘You’re not seriously going to put that in my mouth, are you’ AU


Sports Coach AU

  • ‘I’m a single parent and you’re my kid’s volleyball coach, I’m sorry I introduced them to Haikyuu!! how can I make it up to you?’ AU
  • ‘I’ve been tasked with this feeble looking teen who can’t do push ups for shit’ AU


Librarian AU

  • ‘I’m a library assistant and you’re the person who comes in every week with 100000000 kids and still manages to keep them all in check, you are amazing’ AU
  • ‘We have a self-checkout system, but ever week you unfailingly turn up at my desk and OH MY GOD IS THAT GERONIMO STILTON’ AU
  • ‘I must say your taste in books is beautiful, can I take you out for coffee?’ AU
  • ‘You’re balancing a pile of fifteen books in your arms and you look like you’re about to fall any moment now’ AU


Wedding Planner AU

  • ‘I’m a wedding planner and you’re the wedding photographer, I agree with you completely, this couple is absolutely disgusting – they need to stop with all the sappiness and frills and make out sessions in front of you when you’re trying to ask them about what they want in their actual wedding, yeah, let’s get lots of cheap alcohol at a bar somewhere, together, after this whole ordeal is done (and maybe make our own wedding a lot less cringeworthy)’ AU


Bakery AU

  • ‘I work at a bakery and you’re the person that buys a smiley face cupcake every single day, I swear to God stop smiling at me like that, like, that’s the cupcake’s job’ AU
  • ‘Do you really want to give a dick cake to your niece?’ AU
  • ‘That comes to six hundred dollars in total’ AU


Office Jobs AU

  • ‘I’m in a boring corporate business job and you’re in the cubicle in front of mine, did you just send me a paper aeroplane with the words “WASSSSSSUPPPP TURN UP BITCHEZ” written on it?’ AU
  • ‘I never usually go to workplace drinking sessions but since you’re here sign me the fuck up’ AU
  • ‘CAN YOU STOP DISTRACTING ME I HAVE THIS HUGEASS REPORT TO TYPE UP BY TODAY, NO I DON’T CARE IF YOUR CAT GAVE BIRTH wAit hold up can I adopt one?’ AU
  • ‘Are you seriously going to turn that poor excuse of a prototype in to the boss? You’ll get the sack’ AU
  • ‘We’re both vying for a promotion, and you’re not above sabotaging my work’ AU

(( OOC: So. I know how fond you are all of Fem!Remus. Me too, guys, me too.

And doing We’ll Be Ghosts made me think a lot about the latter part of her story within the Fem!AU.

What happens when Sirius dies? How does she deal with that? And what about… Tonks? Genderbent Tonks?

And then I thought… do we need to genderbend Tonks?

As @lizziebennetnotinjapan rightly pointed out, Tonks has never been one to conform to gender rules. And besides, half the reason I created the Fem!AU was to have more wlw. 

……….So why not stick with the theme?

Tonks: Merlin… chatty one, aren’t you?

(( OOC: ………I’m enjoying this idea. ))

Imagine telling The Doctor you are getting married... and him getting quite upset because he has never met the man.... or has he?

Originally posted by theviolinistinthetardis

“So what shall we do tomorrow? I heard that on the planet of….”

“Doctor.” You cut him short, you just couldn’t keep the secret any longer, “The only adventure I will be making tomorrow is the one to the chapel.”

“Well why on Earth would you be going there? The chapel is a alien meeting hall, and why I am aware they are probably going to have a meeting there I couldn’t see you attending.”

“No Doctor.I mean a chapel on Earth.”

“Since when have you been religious?” He asked with a puzzled look on his face.

“Since I got engaged.” You answered, slowly taking the ring out of it’s hiding place.

“Congratulations!” He exclaimed as his arms wrapped around you tightly, your body stiffing at the unexpected reaction, however the hug soon ended, “Wait a moment, Who the Dalek are you marrying?” 

“And there is the reaction I expected.” You smiled as you looked at him and began walking around the control panel. 

“[Y/N]…. who are you marrying?”

“It is a surprise Doctor.” You teased as you watched the upset start to form

“Do I at least know the man?”

“Probably not, however he does know many people so maybe you do.”

“Well why have I not definatly met him yet?” He snapped as you smiled

“Well because I don’t want to scare him, not yet at least. See I haven’t quite explained to him yet that his future bride travels space and time with a fez wearing, bow tie lovering, doctor who has two hearts, regenerates and has a time traveling police box that can take them all over space and time. And that is what I have been doing when I say I am working at Torchwood. However you are invited to the wedding, where I will introduce him to you properly.”

“Can I at least know his name.”

“Jack.” 

“What is his last name?”

“Guess you will just have to show up tomorrow to find out.” You smirked as he let out an annoyed sigh.

“Well will I like this Jack fellow?”

“I think you will.” You smiled at the thought of the old friends meeting again…

Originally posted by consultinggallifreyanfallenangel

How you name your children

I’ve been doing a lot of preferences lately,they’re just fast and easy and don’t take as much editing.

Masterlist


Harry’s era

Harry

“For the last damn time,Harry,I am not naming my child after Snape!”

“But he was so very brave!“he pleaded.

"No,no and no!”

“What about Severus-”

“Why does it have to be such a fancy name?!Every damn time,Harry!I just want one child with a normal name!I want to name it Nathan,for example!”

Ron

“She will be named after something nice and sweet,like a flower."he said.

"Fine.What do you think of Lily?”

His face lit up.

“As long as Harry hasn’t called dibs on the name.”

Draco

“Celeste.Celeste sounds lovely.”

“No.”

“Serenity.Really soothing.”

“No.”

“Jacklyn?Jacklyn sounds..-”

“No.”

“Narcissa.”

“Perfect.”

Neville

“Well,I think I know a name that I would really love to give our baby.”

“Hm?”

“But I’m not sure you’d agree…”

“Spit it out.”

“Alice Neville Longbottom.”

“Speechless.”

George

“It’s obvious.We’re naming it Doodle.”

“Why on earth would I name my firstborn child Doodle?”

“Because they’d call it Doody for short.”

I snorted and burst out laughing.

“Fine.Fine,that’s ridicilous.Wingardium Leviosa is the perfect name.”

“Because?”

“Everyone would make various objects fly around the room when they scream at it.”

Fred

“Well,it’s twins.”

“Quite so.”

“Then it’s absolutely obvious what they shall be named.”

“Absolutely.”

Both:
“Gred and Forge!”

Marauder’s era

James

“What about Silvia?”

“No,too muggle-ish.”

“Your turn.”

“Dara.”

“Too hard on the tongue.”

“Destiny?”

“Too wizard-like!”

“What do you want,then!?”

“I say Thea.”

“And I agree.”

Sirius

“Well,we all know-”

“Bailey.”

“I like Bailey.”

“Bailey’s nice.”

“So it’s Bailey?”

“No.”

“Still sticking to-?”

“To Regina?Yes.”

Remus

“You name them.I’ll mess it all up.”

“Sheesh,you won’t!”

“What about…Savannah?”

“I like Savannah,Remus.There’s just one hole in the plan.”

“What is it?”

“I’m carrying a boy,Remus.”

Peter

Why the bloody hell would you find yourself pregnant with Peter’s excuse for a child?

The types as “The Lord of the Rings” quotes - Part. 2: ELVES

ENFJ - “The world is indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater.” (Haldir)

INFJ - “Oft in lies truth is hidden.” (Glorfindel)

ESTP - “It is perilous to study too deeply the arts of the Enemy, for good or for ill.” (Elrond)

ISTP - “Farewell! […] I go to find the Sun!” (Legolas) 

ENFP - “The wide world is all about you: you can fence yourselves in, but you cannot for ever fence it out.” (Gildor)

INFP -  “A red sun rises, blood has been spilled this night.” (Legolas)

ENTP - “Shall I describe it to you? […] Or would you like me to find you a box?” (Legolas)  

INTP -“Seldom give unguarded advice, for advice is a dangerous gift, even from the wise to the wise, and all courses may run ill.” (Gildor) 

ENTJ -” In the place of a Dark Lord you would have a Queen! Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the Morn! Treacherous as the Seas! Stronger than the foundations of the Earth! All shall love me and despair! “ (Galadriel) 

INTJ -  “On nothing is the power of the Dark Lord more clearly shown than in the estrangement that divides all those who still oppose him.” (Haldir)

ESTJ - “Follow what may, great deeds are not lessened in worth.” (Legolas)

ISTJ - “Do not despise the lore that has come down from distant years; for oft it may chance that old wives keep in memory word of things that once were needful for the wise to know.” (Celeborn)

ESFP - “The strongest must seek a way, say you? But I say: let a ploughman plough, but choose an otter for swimming, and for running light over grass and leaf, or over snow–an Elf.” (Legolas)

ISFP - "Such is oft the course of deeds that move the wheels of the world: small hands do them because they must, while the eyes of the great are elsewhere.“ (Elrond)

ESFJ - “Thus is it spoken: Oft hope is born, when all is forlorn.” (Legolas)

ISFJ - “Do not trouble your hearts overmuch with thought of the road tonight. Maybe the paths that you each shall tread are already laid before your feet, though you do not see them.” (Galadriel)


The types as quotes from Gandalf.

Those who are Broken | Chapter Sixteen

Everyone has a soulmate. Except the Broken.

Word count: 2324

↬⚪

Chapter list

Originally posted by gothdollysedits

“I’m sorry, what?” you asked Jungkook, completely unsure if you had heard the blond correctly.

You noticed from under his blond, a shade of pink began to appear. Even on his cheeks. “Well—I mean, not like that—not that there is anything wrong with you, I think you’re beautiful, and funny—I’m not into you like that—I mean—” Jungkook sighed, obviously frustrated with himself.

You felt bad for him, so you said, “I’m not against to going with you. I’m just trying to understand why.” You gestured towards the elevator. “Where are we headed. You can tell my why you asked me out.” The two of you made your way down the hall and towards the elevator Jungkook had just come from. He pressed the button, the doors immediately opening as the two of you entered. “Plus, I was heading out anyway.”

The entire walk out of the academy, and the entire drive to town was rather silent. You waited patiently for Jungkook to tell you why he had asked you out, but the poor kid seemed to be at war with himself on how to give you the answer.

You were growing a bit agitated.

When the two of you entered the familiar hangout, you followed him to the back of the building where a booth resided. You slid in one side while Jungkook claimed the other.  

“Why are you so scared to tell me why you asked me out?” you couldn’t help but ask the second he looked comfortable enough.

Again, you could see the contemplation in his eyes, but finally, he sighed. “I…” he trailed off, looking away from you. “I need advice on how to date. I don’t know what I’m doing.” He shrugged. “Since I’m not her soulmate, I’m hoping to meet someone else, but I need help trying to… woo one.”

You snorted, shaking your head. “Well,” you began, leaning back in your seat, “how you asked me out, while some women may like it, others won’t like how potent you are.” You gestured towards him. “Your entire demeanor reads innocence. Your approach should be a bit sweeter.” Jungkook frowns in confusion. “Like that,” you told him, pointing to his face.

“Frowning? Frowning is cute to women?” he asked, completely confused.

“To some women, yes. Women could either be attracted to cute guys like you, or playboys like—”

Keep reading

unxpctedlygreat  asked:

Shidge with : “You’ve gotta stop doing that.” “What?” “Saying things that make me want to kiss you.” ? :3c

Ask and you shall receive :3c I’m not decided if this is an AU or an after the war and getting back to Earth timeline, But what’s sure is that they’re in their late 20s/early 30s.

Pidge sighed as she sank in the armchair near the window. She had woken up in the middle of the night because she was feeling sick, but couldn’t go back to sleep. So she went to sit in front of the window to look at the stars, in her favourite blanket. It had been a gift from Lance a few years ago; he had knitted it himself with the softest wool he had managed to find. Pidge just loved to sit there, in the comfort of her room, during rainy days, or when she was sick. She just felt warm and safe there, and the armchair had something to do with it.

It had been one of the first pieces of furniture she had purchased when moving to this house and had been worn down by years of use. But she thought it just make the cushion softer, comfier, and refused to part from it. And now that it brought her comfort during nights like those, she was glad she hadn’t discarded it.

Some noise behind her caught her attention, and she turned her head just in time to see Shiro get out of the bed.

“Sorry I woke you up,” she whispered when he got close enough. He shook his head and sat next to her feet.

“You didn’t, I tried to hug you and you were gone.”

Pidge rolled her eyes, but smiled at him. “Meaning I’m still responsible.”

Shiro didn’t fight back. Instead, he ran his hand over her knee and looked her in the eyes.

“Feeling sick again?”

“Yeah,” she nodded, “Mom told me it should stop soon, I hope she’s right.”

Silence settled over them for a while, and Pidge went back to looking at the stars. Shiro’s rubbing, that went from her knee to her calf, made her drowsy. She almost didn’t register him stopping his ministrations.

“Please stop bothering your mom.”

This caught Pidge’s attention, so she looked down where Shiro was nuzzling her belly. Warmth spread through her chest at seeing him talk to their baby while she was hardly showing, and she ran her hand through his short strands.

“You’ve gotta stop doing that.” 

Shiro looked up at her, confused. “What?” 

“Saying things that make me want to kiss you.”

He smiled, and took on of her hand in his.

“What’s stopping you?”

They intertwined their fingers, and Pidge grabbed Shiro’s chin with her free hand. They moved in together and their lips met, moving slowly. Pidge soon grew more bold, angling her head to nip at Shiro’s bottom lip, not caring that his stubble burned her skin.  

Pidge abandoned Shiro’s lips to rest her head on his shoulder. The warmth in her chest was stronger than before, and she let it overflow, murmuring I love you against Shiro’s skin. He kissed her forehead, and grabbed her shoulders to detach her from him and look her in the eyes.

“And I love you too… Now let’s get you back to bed.”

He didn’t let her time to answer, he cradled her in his arms and carried her back to their bed. They cuddled, her back against Shiro’s chest, and she fell back asleep with his hand on her barely showing bump.


I don’t know how to write kisses :’) I should have stopped at what’s stopping you