what ive been through

{ I want you a lot }

someone send me asks. but personal asks. ask me questions about people or what ive been through or something cmon just ask me questions get to know me. I need a distraction.

what she says: im fine

what she means: ive been looking through my old stuff trying to make myself cry because i feel like crying bc theres definitely some built up emotional issue happening here but the thought of me having emotions of love and romantic gestures that i tried doing some months ago dont make me sad anymore it just makes me want to actually vomit so like i dont really know what im trying to accomplish anymore so i put on a tiara and started screaming so thats where im at


Mmmmm well see ion wanna show my face but i WILL partake in the year end photo set ting. 

I was tagged by the  @blackqueerboi and @nectarwoman <3 thank you both for thinking of me!!! 

All of these photo’s have stood out to me in some type of way this year. I felt drawn to them and felt them. This year pulled me both further and closer to myself. I felt intensely this whole year and found myself in a multitude of defining events. There has never been a more testing and irritating year to live through, but im here and wont let what ive been through during this year go in vain.

I tag @worldofone @warmandwarm @singwoyuanyi @eueasflores @goyamangonectar @barhart @gingrhunny @guavavenezolana @guavaagoddess @sisserou @decolonizefeminism @vvaterling @xtramedium !!!

i dont like how ppl think saying ur mental illness is the reason ur not excelling in academics is just an ‘excuse’ in fact it pisses me the fuck off and if u have below avg grades n u have some sort of mental illness i fucking love u n hope it gets easier for u. that shit really does take a toll on ur grades and yes some ppl w mental illness get hella good grades but dont compare urself bc everyone rly is different as corny as it sounds

like honestly. even if it is an excuse, its so fucking valid. dont beat urself up over it, just be proud of what u were able to accomplish and hopefully u get better over time, both mentally & academically

soundwavespark  asked:

hey dude, i don't know you that well but ive been through something similar to what you've gone through. i lost all my friends this fall and had to start over completely @ school. i mean like completely i thought i was gonna have to transfer schools nd i wanted to hurt myself. i wanted to give up. but trust me, there is an end to the darkness. and we'll be here always dude to help and everything and just please, please hang in there for a little longer. please. you're worth it, trust me.

this is gonna sound like some stupid shit but your icon is emmet and i read it in his voice ad i feel a little better o thanks i. guess

anonymous asked:

To Dice: It's your fault, isn't it? Why your AU's a mess? Your own brother doesn't want to see you and I doubt Peppermint knows about your situation

Dice: AND ABOUT MY AU.. ITS NOT A MESS, ITS GONE. FOREVER. AND YES, ITS MY FAULT. SO SHUT YOUR MOUTH, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IVE BEEN THROUGH AND WHAT I HAVE DONE. WHAT IVE SEEN.. YOU WOULD AGREE THAT MY BROTHER HAS EVERY RIGHT TO BE MAD! …. I don’t like this subject… Don’t bring it up again… I’m just glad nobody knows my AU. Therefore.. No one knows it’s destroyed, and nobody can find it because of that. … Just leave me alone.

anonymous asked:

hey ik what happened totally sucks, ive been through something similar and its so tough. but pls remember, if anything, your identity isnt in how you play softball, its in the kindness and goodness in your character and that will never change <3

this is true, thank you


finally have pokemon go!!! yiiisssss!!! (>y<)im a pokemon trainer again, after…LIKE A MILLION YEARS SINCE POKEMON LEAF GREEN. AAAAAAAAAAAAA ;;;;

my first catch was a bulbasaur. (。・ω・。) i nicknamed her Kopii.///////// such a cuteh! ❤❤❤

I just wish my step dad were my birth dad. I wouldnt have to deal with depression because i would never have known a day of what ive been through. And i try not to talk about it much because everyone always acts like i was sheltered from it. I wasnt. I was just always the one who hid quietly and waited for the storm to pass.
And god, depression doesnt run in my step dads family. I wouldnt have to struggle every day to force a smile or try and be happy. I wouldnt have to pretend, even when i just feel no emotion.
They dont understand how terrifying it is to feel ecstatic and completely in love with someone one day, and the next to be incapable of feeling any emotion. To know that i love this person, and know how happy they make me but to feel nothing.
And my family doesnt understand that when im in bed all day it might be because my mind feels like its in another realm, doesnt belong in my body. How that directly affects my day because if i get out of bed theres no connection and thats when i used to hurt myself.
I just…. i dont get why i have to go through this, why i didnt get to grow up normally. I dont get why i just get fucked up for no reason. Doesnt matter though. Not really.


1985 - San Diego, CA

7Beds/5Baths/7,000 + Sqft


when I was a kid everyone said that this abandoned mansion was haunted and when i was like 16 i snuck into it to explore it and someone walking by saw me and my friend climb through the window and we ended up getting arrested. We meant no harm and just wanted to see what was up with it. Ive been combing through san diego mid century houses and came across this one and kind of had to laugh about it. the floor plans are so crazy to look through. there are multiple ELEVATORS in this house