what is your function in life

anonymous asked:

Mama, I think it happening again. I can already feel myself starting to smile less, I'm not eating as much, and I just feel like I'm closing myself off. I don't want for this to happen but I just can't stop it.

I know the feeling. Please try to push through. You need to try everything to keep your regular schedules up and keep doing what you always do to some degree (talking about functioning here and keeping your life in order) but also try to locate what triggered you getting worse and maybe work it out somehow. Try to avoid things that stress you as much as possible (I know this barely works with school/work but please try anyway to keep it positive). If you got this more often I’d recommend professional help from a therapist or a psychiatrist ❤ please take care! I love you!

A brief and ugly summary of surviving cold climates

For visitors and writers alike.

  1. You were never meant to be here. Never forget this. You are an ape of the equator, built to run the savannah and swim in tropical waters. Whatever terms and conditions your body has, they are void here. Mother nature never certified to function in a Death World.
  2. Enduring the cold is never a matter of “how much” as much at it is “how long”. Think of it as the water levels of the vieogames you have played. No matter what equipment enables you to remain longer, you can’t stay there indefinitely. The coat that keeps you warm and toasty for three hours in -15 is enough to keep you functional for an hour of -40.
  3. Whatever the locals say, listen to them. Err to the side of caution if you must. You may not endure what they can endure, but you SURE AS FUCKING NOT cannot survive what they say cannot be endured.
  4. That being said, alcohol is a filthy fucking liar and so is anyone who offers it to you. The warmth it gives is an illusion, and a sign of damage. You are worse off feeling comfortable with a mouthful of whiskey as you are freezing your gonads off stone cold sober.
  5. Winter tires. Studded winter tiers are a MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH when you drive on a frozen road. That being said, whatever the locals tell you that your car will need to run as theirs do, take it. Taking the risk of being pranked is worth survival, and you can always stab their tires in the spring if they were shitting you.
  6. Eat. For the love of god, make sure that you eat. Heavier meals might be unpalatable at first for someone used to lighter nutrition, but maintaining bodily warmth in a cold climate takes up a lot of energy, and you will feel tired and drowsy for a long while shile your metabolism adjusts to producing more heat than Mother Nature ever intended. The skinny people in your party are especially vulnerable, ensure their well-being on a regular basis.
  7. If you have a smartphone/other essential technology on your body, keep them close to your body to keep them warm. They were not designed to be frozen any more than you were.
  8. Sleep is death. SLEEP IS DEATH. Never, ever stop to rest in the cold, if you do not have the means to make a fire/otherwise produce heat. The cold tires you out because keeping warm takes energy, but taking a rest will not return your energy. If you feel the need to sit down and rest because you are tired because of the cold, call for help. This is not a hyperbole, if you feel like you are too tired to go on in a cold climate, CALL A FUCKING AMBULANCE. If you fall asleep in the snow, you will not wake up. Hypothermia can and will literally kill you.
  9. Avoid skin-to-snow-contact if you can. It hurts because you were not supposed to do it. Consider ice to be like acid. Touching is bad for you.

Feel free to add to the list if you feel like I missed something.

“Welcome,” she said. “Welcome, and thank you for agreeing to be a volunteer with Multnomah County Libraries. We are so grateful for you and your commitment to our community. For the next hour, we’re going to go over some important information that you need to know as a volunteer, no matter what role you play.”

I expected that we were going to learn about things like policies for canceling our shifts, or maybe where to find first aid kits. We probably did talk about those things. But the part that I remember most vividly is the first thing she talked about.

“We’re going to start with the Library Bill of Rights from the American Library Association,” she said, and she projected the text of the document onto the screen. “Everyone who works for libraries, including volunteers, helps to support and uphold the Library Bill of Rights.”

This was new to me. I’d been a regular patron at my local public library for years, graduating from Dr. Seuss to The Babysitters Club series to, most recently, my fixation on books about neo-paganism and queer sex. No one had mentioned this whole Bill of Rights thing. It was a short document with just a few bullet points.

“Libraries support free access to information,” Bess explained. “One of our core values is intellectual freedom. This impacts all of you because when you’re volunteering for the library, we expect you to support the rights of library users to find and read whatever they want, even if you don’t agree with what they’re looking for.”

She continued, “For example, let’s say that a small child came up to you and asked where to find the Stephen King books. You might think those books are too scary for someone that age, or that he shouldn’t be reading that kind of stuff. But that doesn’t matter. No matter what, we help people find the information they want, and we don’t censor their interests. Does that make sense?”

Heads around the room nodded, and I leaned back into the wall, letting her words sink in. It was absolutely, positively the most radical, punk rock thing I had ever heard in my life.

I can read whatever I want. No one can stop me.

I can help other people read what they want. And no one can stop them.

“This is core,” Bess added, “to a functioning democracy. We believe that fighting censorship and providing free, unrestricted access is key to helping citizens participate in the world. And, most importantly, we keep everyone’s information strictly confidential. So, even if you know what books your neighbor is checking out or what they’re looking at on the computer, you don’t share that with anyone.”

As someone who kept carefully guarded notebooks full of very personal thoughts, I was especially excited by the library’s emphasis on privacy. All of this sounded great. I wanted more. I wanted in. I wanted to be a crazy, wild, counterculture librarian-witch who would help anyone read anything from The Anarchist’s Cookbook to Mein Kampf. I would be a bold freedom fighter in the face of censorship. I would defend unfiltered Internet access and anatomically correct picture books. Maybe I was only in the eighth grade, but I was ready to stand up to anyone who tried to threaten the ideal of intellectual freedom. Fuck blink-182. Libraries were the real punk rock.

— 

LIBRARIES ARE THE REAL PUNK ROCK by Zoe Fisher

was thinking about this also: don’t hide your child’s disability from the child themself, or pretend it doesn’t exist

one of my best friends went to an autistic school for 7 years, but no one ever actually explained to him what autism actually was! parents never talked about it! so he thought that when he went to high school he’d ‘grown out of it,’ whatever it was.

we kept running into situations where, for example, we’re sitting together and someone asks me why I’m flapping and I say “I’m stimming, I’m autistic,” or this friend hears me explain accommodation stuff to a new teacher. and he kept responding with surprise: “that’s an autism thing? is autism the reason we do that?” “yeah!” “oh wow, I thought I was just weird!”

so i’ve been trying to convince my friend for most of this year now that all this ‘unusual’ stuff that we do and difficulties we have are just our natural way of being, because of our neurotype and disability… and the reaction has consistently been relief. like “oh, that’s why I’m like this! it’s not the wrong way, it’s just the autistic way!”

if you act like your child’s disability doesn’t exist, it won’t actually stop existing. they will still be a disabled child, only now they will have no understanding of what that means. they’re going to feel confused and out-of-place at best; have their needs ignored and most probably going to push themselves to able-bodied neurotypical standards of functioning when they just cannot handle that, which is extremely unhealthy!

disability is not a bad word! it is not shameful! you gain nothing from pretending a disabled person in your life is not disabled at all. 

I honestly just need somebody in my life who’s very open about sex. Not on some freak shit, but like us being comfortable with each other. Comfortable enough to share what we like and don’t like, how we can make each other have the best climaxes, talk about bodily functions, let go of any stigmas, build confidence in one another to be more vulnerable during sex, and not feel embarrassed about any kinks we might have or weird things that turn us on. Sex should be relaxing and easy to talk about with your partner. That’s why I always feel a good friend is the best person to have sex with sometimes because it just flows so naturally.

Humans are weird

So I’ve been seeing a bunch of these humans are weird space orcs from space Australia stories touching on different mental illnesses but haven’t seen any on DID so I thought I’d take a crack at it:


Zu'lak: Human Tera!

*seconds go bye*

Zu'lak: *starts moving closer* Human Tera!

Me *whispery scratchy voice*: Oh hey, uh Tera isn’t around at the moment, whaddya need?

Zu'lak: What do you mean Human Tera is not here? I can clearly see you standing in front of me. And what is wrong with your voice? Are you ill?

Me: *sighs* In a way yes. We have this disorder, dissociative identity disorder, it’s something our brain did as a coping mechanism as a result of trauma as a child. In layman’s terms we essentially have multiple people sharing a body.

Zu'lak: I do not understand. You have multiple sentient life forms all inhabiting one body? And you are still able to function? How many of you are there?

Me: More or less yeah, there are a LOT of other stuff that come along with it. And the amount of people can vary from system to system, some have just a few, some have dozens.

Zu'lak: Dozens?? *writes all this down in a notebook* So if you are not Human Tera what are you referred to as?

Me: Dawn.

Zu'lak: Very well Human Dawn–

Me: Just Dawn is fine.

Zu'lak: Very well Dawn. Come with me you must inform me of all you know of this disorder you have so we may accommodate you accordingly.

Your body is capable of almost anything if you treat it the way it deserves to be treated. You can climb mountains, run for miles and bend in ways that make people cringe, with the nourishment and love that you should always be striving to give it. Try loving your body, treat it as if it is a old friend, as if you want it to function into old age, and see what your body gives you back.
— 

Bodies are made for love by Amy Kennedy

13/03/17

Like this? Check out my book here!

On trauma aftermaths that don't advance the plot

The way TV shows trauma can lead people to expect every reference to trauma to be a plot point. This can be isolating to people coping with the aftermaths of trauma. Sometimes people treat us as stories rather than as people. Sometimes, instead of listening to us, they put a lot of pressure on us to advance the plot they’re expecting.

On TV, triggers tend to be full audiovisual flashbacks that add something to the story. You see a vivid window into the character’s past, and something changes. On TV, trauma aftermaths are usually fascinating. Real life trauma aftermaths are sometimes interesting, but also tend to be very boring to live with.

On TV, triggers tend to create insight. In real life, they’re often boring intrusions interfering with the things you’d rather be thinking about. Sometimes knowing darn well where they come from doesn’t make them go away. Sometimes it’s more like: Seriously? This again?

On TV, when trauma is mentioned, it’s usually a dramatic plot point that happens in a moment. In real life, trauma aftermaths are a mundane day-to-day reality that people live with. They’re a fact of life — and not necessarily the most important one at all times. People who have experienced trauma do other things too. They’re important, but not the one and only defining characteristic of who someone is. And things that happened stay important even when you’re ok. Recovery is not a reset. Mentioning the past doesn’t necessarily mean you’re in crisis.

On TV, when a character mentions trauma, or gets triggered in front of someone, it’s usually a dramatic moment. It changes their life, or their relationship with another character, or explains their backstory, or something. In real life, being triggered isn’t always a story, and telling isn’t always a turning point. Sometimes it’s just mentioning something that happened to be relevant. Sometimes it’s just a mundane instance of something that happens from time to time.

Most people can’t have a dramatic transformative experience every time it turns out that their trauma matters. Transformative experiences and moments of revelation exist, but they’re not the end all and be all of trauma aftermaths. Life goes on, and other things matter too. And understanding what a reaction means and where it came from doesn’t always make it go away. Sometimes, it takes longer and has more to do with skill-building than introspection. Sometimes it doesn’t go away.

On a day to day level, it’s often better to be matter-of-fact about aftermaths. It can be exhausting when people see you as a story and expect you to advance the plot whenever they notice some effect of trauma. Pressure to perform narratives about healing doesn’t often help people to make their lives better. Effect support involves respecting someone as a complex human, including the boring parts.

The aftermath of trauma is a day-to-day reality. It affects a lot of things, large and small. It can be things like being too tired to focus well in class because nightmares kept waking you up every night this week. TV wants that to be a dramatic moment where the character faces their past and gets better. In real life, it’s often a day where you just do your best to try and learn algebra anyway. Because survivors do things besides be traumatized and think about trauma. Sometimes it’s not a story. Sometimes it’s just getting through another day as well as possible.

A lot of triggers are things like being unable to concentrate on anything interesting because some kinds of background noises make you feel too unsafe to pay attention to anything else. For the zillionth time.  Even though you know rationally that they’re not dangerous. Even though you know where they come from, and have processed it over and over. Even if you’ve made a lot of progress in dealing with them, even if they’re no longer bothersome all the time. For most people, recovery involves a lot more than insight. The backstory might be interesting, but being tired and unable to concentrate is boring.

Triggers can also mean having to leave an event and walk home by yourself while other people are having fun, because it turns out that it hurts too much to be around pies and cakes. Or having trouble finding anything interesting to read that isn’t intolerably triggering. Or having trouble interacting with new people because you’re too scared or there are too many minefields. Or being so hypervigilant that it’s hard to focus on anything. No matter how interesting the backstory is, feeling disconnected and missing out on things you wanted to enjoy is usually boring.

When others want to see your trauma as a story, their expectations sometimes expand to fill all available space. Sometimes they seem to want everything to be therapy, or want everything to be about trauma and recovery.

When others want every reference to trauma to be the opening to a transformative experience, it can be really hard to talk about accommodations. For instance, it gets hard to say things like:

  • “I’m really tired because of nightmares” or 
  • “I would love to go to that event, but I might need to leave because of the ways in which that kind of thing can be triggering” or 
  • “I’m glad I came, but I can’t handle this right now” or
  • “I’m freaking out now, but I’ll be ok in a few minutes” or 
  • “I need to step out — can you text me when they stop playing this movie?”

It can also be hard to mention relevant experiences. There are a lot of reasons to mention experiences other than wanting to process, eg:

  • “Actually, I have experience dealing with that agency”
  • “That’s not what happens when people go to the police, in my experience, what happens when you need to make a police report is…”
  • “Please keep in mind that this isn’t hypothetical for me, and may not be for others in the room as well.”

Or any number of other things.

When people are expecting a certain kind of story, they sometimes look past the actual person. And when everyone is looking past you in search of a story, it can be very hard to make connections.

It helps to realize that no matter what others think, your story belongs to you. You don’t have to play out other people’s narrative expectations. It’s ok if your story isn’t what others want it to be. It’s ok not to be interesting. It’s ok to have trauma reactions that don’t advance the plot. And there are people who understand that, and even more people who can learn to understand that.

It’s possible to live a good life in the aftermath of trauma. It’s possible to relearn how to be interested in things. It’s possible to build space you can function in, and to build up your ability to function in more spaces. It’s often possible to get over triggers. All of this can take a lot of time and work, and can be a slow process. It doesn’t always make for a good story, and it doesn’t always play out the way others would like it to. And, it’s your own personal private business. Other people’s concern or curiosity does not obligate you to share details.

Survivors and victims have the right to be boring. We have the right to deal with trauma aftermaths in a matter-of-fact way, without indulging other people’s desires for plot twists. We have the right to own our own stories, and to keep things private. We have the right to have things in our lives that are not therapy; we have the right to needed accommodations without detailing what happened and what recovery looks like. Neither traumatic experiences nor trauma aftermaths erase our humanity.

We are not stories, and we have no obligation to advance an expected plot. We are people, and we have the right to be treated as people. Our lives, and our stories, are our own.

#SelfLoveSunday

8 Ways You Can Create A Positive Life Today

The ultimate form of self-love is creating a positive way of life for yourself, regardless of what has come before you can create a better tomorrow.       

Here’s how:

1. Be selfish - create the life YOU want to live. Forget about what everyone else wants for you and think about what makes you happy. What excites you? What are your dreams? Pursue them without regard for anyone else’s opinions or feelings - this is YOUR life, live it for yourself.

2. Love - centre your life around what you love. A positive way of life comes from positive thoughts and positive thoughts are created from positive actions. Positive actions are those that move you toward what you love to do, so paint, dance, sing - doing what you love will fill today with positive experiences & thoughts.

3. Negativity - has no room in your life anymore. You have to make a commitment to getting rid of negativity in all forms. Whether that’s people, habits or activities you’re involved with - you cannot hope to have a positive life if you’re surrounded by negativity. Negative surroundings = negative thoughts and negative thoughts create a negative life.

4. Nature - observe the natural flow of life. Make time to be with the natural energy of the planet - observe how there is no stress, no expectations & no time. When we immerse ourselves in nature it’s clear to see how much we can learn from the environment we came from.

5. Fresh start - every day is a new day. Each sunrise is a reminder that yesterday has gone - today brings thousands of opportunities for us to create the life we love. Living in the now allows us to make the most of the time we have on this planet - a second lived outside of the present moment is a second wasted.

6. Time with yourself - reconnect with who you truly are. We can become consumed by negativity when we identify with our struggles, hardships or the opinions others hold of us. This is why it’s absolutely essential for us to spend time with ourselves to gain perspective on our lives - who we are & what we came here to do.

7. Authenticity - be yourself. If you’re living a lie - it will be very difficult to live a positive way of life. Ask yourself why you aren’t being true to yourself and what you want from the time you have left on the planet. When you behave in a way that makes you happy you will begin experiencing a truly positive life.

8. Gratitude - the best attitude. Be grateful for everything you have in your life right now. Thank the universe for the fact that you have life right now, here are things I thank the universe for every day - thank you for my sight, hearing, creativity, ability to walk, speech, the people in my life, my dogs & for allowing me to experience this reality as a human with a functioning body.

You can’t live a positive life with a negative mind.

Peace & positive vibes.

Florida friends - if you have a laptop computer of any kind with a functional battery, even if it’s old, slow, the screen is busted, the wifi doesn’t work, a tribble shat in the keyboard, whatever - charge that fucker and keep it charged. If you lose power, the USB ports of a fully charged laptop can be your new BFFs and breathe life into a dying phone several times over. When Harvey hit here and we lost power, my dinky little Chromebook is what kept my phone alive through multiple recharges so I was able to communicate with friends and family, check weather conditions, activate the flashlight as needed, and so forth. At no point did I even turn the computer on - I just used it as a portable phone charger, and the thing saved my ass. 

Sex with the Avengers

Request: In your opinion, what is the favorite sexual position of each guy (Steve, Bucky, Pietro, Clint, Bruce, Tony) with a female partner? And for Natasha and Wanda (ONLY if you’re comfortable with)? I’M IN LOVE WIH YOUR BLOG! -Anon

A/N: Oops, I planned to write this quickly -like just tell you the positions, but now here I am, four hours later and all of the descriptions aren’t even containing one exact position. Sorry, I hope you like these anyway haha x AND THANK YOU DOLL ♥

Ps. Gosh, I’m such a trash for Steve.

Originally posted by starksokovia

Pietro

Keyword: His speed. Oh god, that speed. He would take time to have sex with you, but he would use his speed while teasing you –first, he’s kissing you against the wall and before you even realize, you are laying naked underneath him, his mouth devouring your dripping wet core, causing you to scream his name from the sudden contact.

Pietro would love to be on top; pressing you against the mattress, kissing your lips or sucking your neck demandingly. This position gives him everything he wants; chance to see your expressions, eventuality to touch you and the oh so good possibility to use his speed on you, fucking you hard while you tangle your fingers to his hair or dig your nails to his back, leaving marks he loves to see at the morning after your heated night together.

Keep reading

Apologise to kids

Everyone who spends any time at all around children is going to eventually do something that requires an apology. You might be snappish to a kid, or forget something important to them, or trip and bump into them. No one is perfect, and when these things do happen, it’s important that adults – parents, especially – be able, willing, and ready to apologise to children.

  1. It shows them that they are important to you, their feelings are important to you and that you care enough to try not to hurt them. (Everyone needs this knowledge in order to feel safe in a relationship.)
  2. It models healthy ways to deal with conflict - how to keep a relationship a happy and safe place even after something bad happens.
  3. It models for them how to take responsibility for actions you regret, instead of just pretending those things didn’t happen.
  4. It teaches them that even authority figures can be held accountable for harming less powerful people.
  5. It shows them that the thing you did that requires the apology is a wrong thing to do and that they should not mimic that behaviour.
  6. It teaches them to expect the people around them to be accountable for their own behaviour, and it teaches them not to internalize blame for how other people treat them.

When adults routinely fail to apologise to children, children notice. They learn that the function of an apology is to pacify an authority figure, because that’s the only example they get. They learn that they are not respected or heard and that their feelings won’t matter to others until they, too, have control over someone less powerful.

Children learn from your example even more than they learn from your words. Teach your kids how loving and respectful relationships feel, so they can take that knowledge with them into the rest of their life and make better choices because of what you taught them.

Neptune - place of your hidden potential


Neptune is a planet of illusion and confusion. It is very mysterious place in our chart. It brings people a lot of disappointment due to Neptune’s very enigmatic nature. I believe the house our Neptune is placed holds a great potential that is hidden there and takes time to fully understand. What makes you confused and vulnerable with a little bit of work can also be a source of your great strength. 

The House Neptune is shows when you are the most vulnerable. This is a place of confusion, place that you have always a problem to tell the reality from illusion. The way to master your Neptune placement is to recognize your weakness and allow yourself to be vulnerable in this area. Be aware of what brings you confusion. Awarness is your greatest weapon. This is what Neptune truly wants to tell you. Be aware.


1st House - be aware that your weakness lays in your perception of the world and yourself. You may feel lost in life, confused about how you see the world. You may not see it for what it is and people may see you not who you really are. Don’t idolize this world. Don’t idolize your views. Don’t let your artistic nature cloud your judgment. Also, don’t be afraid to be emotional. Don’t be afraid to show your sensitivity. Use amazing psychic gifts you have. Finding confidence in life may be hard for you since your perception of self is delluded but it doesn’t mean it’s impossible. You just have many sides to yourself and you can’t be defined with one word and that’s okay. Be a chameleon; don’t limit yourself to one. Also, your natural optimism can make you a little bit naive so you need to watch out for people because some of them will have no problem using your good heart against you so take care of yourself and trust your intuition more.

2nd House - be aware that your weakness lays in your self-worth. It is what brings you the biggest confusion. You may feel vague about your self-worth. You may feel confused about material things. You need to understand potential that lays in your soul and the practical use of your imagination. You also need to understand that material things are not the biggest evil on the world. They are also not your biggest need. It will always bring you confusion. Find balance!  Be aware of your money (abundance or their lack) in your life. Use them constructively on what you really need. If you can, make your art to give you profit.

3rd House - be aware that your weakness lays in the processing of your words. It can often feel like the words you are looking for in your mind are hidden behind a mist, like they are there but you can’t find them and use them. You can also feel at the moments that you are a better story-teller than everyone else in the room and desperately try to prove it. Don’t idolize the power of your mind but also don’t ignore it. Be aware that you can get an access to a beautiful inner encyclopedia but still you need to make an effort to check yourself while using it. Be aware of the voices you will hear, ideas you will get and be open to messages from your head but be selective of how you will use them. You can take people to other dimensions with your you words, you are highly creative but you must be aware that you need to check things twice before saying them because sometimes your words can be really confusing. Focus on making yourself more clear while speaking, avoid using unecessary words. 

4th House - be aware that your weakness lays in your roots. Family always can bring you a lot of confusion. Many times you don’t see your family for who they really are, you probably idolize them a lot just like your chilhood. You may feel truly lost at your core, not knowing who you are and being too dependent on your roots. Truth is, that yes,  you can become emotionally independent person who is also able to help others to see through their own delusions. You just need to make yourself your strong foundation and set clear boundaries with your family. Your imagination make them seem better that they really are. You need to remember that your home and people who make it are part of your life not the center. Family life will never be as perfect as you wish but it doesn’t mean it’s not going to be good. Appreciate what you can have.

5th House - be aware that your weakness lays in your vision.  You idolize everything. Romance, people, children, hobbies… Everywhere where you can express yourself and follow your vision of “something perfect”.  You just try to run from reality this way. Just be aware perfect love  or a child doesn’t exist. Express yourself artistically, yes, but don’t let your imagination cloud your judgment. Life here is not a Hollywood movie but it doesn’t mean it’s not beautiful. Use your imagination in your creations but don’t let it control your love life (and other aspects). You are extremely creative. Use it wisely.

6th House -  be aware that your weakness lays in working. You love to help others. Animals, people… Your service is needed but is also a place of your delusion. You may get lost in your job. You need to take responsibility and do your work in whatever you choose to but remember about taking care of yourself too. Also, you should pay more attention to deadlines. You can get lost so you need to remember about passing time and other details. You are really responsible and devoted, don’t overdo yourself but also try to look at yourself (especially your health) realistically. Getting a flu won’t kill you but don’t ignore it either. Keep yourself in check.

7th House -  be aware your weakness lays in your  relationships. Whether they are of romantic nature or platonic; you may appear as a very confusing person to others and others are like that to you too. You may have problem with recognizing people who have bad influnece on you, you may idolize them and you can be too dependent on others. There is always something very entangled in your partnerships and you need to recognize that and stop idolizing people in your life. You need to directly adress those issuses. There is a chance for you to see relationships with people clear, as they are. You will become more confident and more independent as a person. Just stay aware of your relationships and don’t let them define you.

8th House - your weakness is tied to taboo topics. You may become obsessed with sensitive topics like death and sex.  You may feel you lack understanding of those and  try obsessively to get information in those areas. You may feel confused and feel you are truly not living your life here on Earth because you may focus too much on matters connected to the other world. You need to be aware that  delving into dangerous matters with that kind of passion may not bring you what you want and just make you feel more lost in life. Use knowledge you gain in constructive way. Don’t hoard it, it can cause you more pain. Share it with others. Don’t idolize taboo. Focus on mundane things too. Come back from the dead, your world is here. 

9th House -  your weakness lays in your philosophy. You may feel confused about your beliefs and be easily influenced by others in this area. Whether you are more into spirituality or religion, any area involving higher realms seems to be bringing confusion to you. This also apply to higher education. You may have problem with finding out what you want to study and you can become perpetual student or reject idea of studying at all. You may have problem with describing your life philosophy and often change beliefs. You can become a fantastic teacher for yourself and others. You have great psychic abilities. Don’t let this confusion stop you from spiritual development. 

10th House - be aware that your weakness lays in your social position. You  feel confused about your position in the world you may feel lost on your life path and you may appear to others as this always indecisive person in those matters. Be aware that feeling of being lost in life happens to everyone. You need to remember about what you truly want to achieve and understand that it will take time. Don’t idolize achievement. Follow it but don’t forget about other important things in life. You will be at the top of a social ladder. You will inspire others to work hard for your goals. Just be aware that outer sucess is not the goal end in life.

11th House - your vulnerability lays in your sense of belonging. 
Confusion is tied to your need to be a part of a group. You may idolize them a lot. You may idolize society a lot and see no flaws in how it functions.  You may also do that to your friends. You need to stop looking at people through pink glasses. Remember that humanity is flawed. Be aware of that  being a human means making  mistakes. You can be a strong individual who can do a lot of good for people and society but you need to remember about the fact that society is built from individuals who just like you, are only humans. Allow them to be.

12th House - your weakness lays in your isolation. You may feel very helpess and confused, you may feel you are not safe in this world and you may try to delve into another to find your inner security. You isolate yourself from this world and it not only brings you more confusion but it is also a source of your pain. You can’t run from yourself. You are extremely gifted person. You have amazing ability to reach higher dimensions but you shouldn’t do that in order to avoid pain. Be aware of the mundane world and try to stay more connected with it. You won’t regret it. Our world is painful but you are a part of it. And people like you make it more beautiful.

In retrograde
- you may have a problem with accepting your vulnerability due to the aversion in immersing into the more spiritual side of yourself. You are a very private person and you dislike showing  vulnerability but it runs deep in you and you cannot reject this part of yourself.

Gem Class Analysis: Pearls

Prior to the recent Steven Bomb, some of the most divisive fan theory characterisations have been for Blue and Yellow Pearl. Theories would range from their having a close and intimate relationship with the Diamonds, to their being physically abused, to it sometimes being a mix of both.

And we can understand the source of what seems like a contradiction. That these Pearls, in particular, are serving the Diamonds directly puts them in a very privileged position, not exactly in the modern sense of the word.

That Pearls are in such close contact with the ruling elite makes them privy to the goings on of upper Homeworld that other gem classes would remain ignorant to. At the same time, they’re also living objects, dehumanised and treated as utilities rather than individuals.

It’s a unique position of power and powerlessness and, unconsciously, we as fans pick up on that; hence, the muddled characterisations of what their relationship with their Diamonds would have been like.

In the latest Steven Bomb, we got to see more of all of these characters and we know now that their relationship isn’t one or the other but somewhere in between.

“Oh no. It was very serious. When I still served Homeworld, I saw it myself.”

In that regard, I want to talk about how Diamonds and their Pearls relate to each another, and look at the implications this has for our very own Pearl, who admits she served Homeworld at one point.

1. The function of the Pearl class

To get this out of the way as early as possible, Pearls are being dehumanised. It’s not right to limit an entire class of gems to objects and prevent them from having individual inclinations, when other gems can manage some level of individuality. Pearls are individuals with their own capabilities, thoughts, and feelings.

Even before we knew about the Diamonds, the way other gems like Peridot initially treated our own Pearl showed us that Pearls are one of the lowest classes on Homeworld.

Words like “owner,” “stand there,” and “hold your stuff” were being thrown around. Not much was expected from them.

In light of all the new information received, a consolidated understanding of what Pearls were expected to do on Homeworld would help in the succeeding discussions. And what we know is that Pearls were gems created specifically to serve particular individuals. This service did not entail doing a job like other gem classes.

Other gems serve a specific function in servicing gem society as a whole. Like builders, soldiers, technicians, and leaders.

This public- or collective-oriented approach to organising gem society makes a lot of sense considering the way the gem life cycle is perpetuated.

The reason we don’t have gem classes specifically for private affairs, like the home life, is because their concept of “home” is much different from ours. Gems are born as full adults; they don’t need to eat or sustain themselves physically. That means a lot of our human necessities don’t apply to them.

That in turn puts the service sector of Gem society, where Pearls are, as something extraneous to functioning. 

It’s much the same for social constructs. Would the Ruby Squad consider themselves a “family?” Probably, but not in the way we understand the word. Instead of families, gems are groups into classes. And in these classes they socialise each other on what it means to be the gem they are.

The best example of this would be the soldier gems, who train each other and depend on each other in missions.

Leggy, the newbie “just born yesterday,” according to Rebecca Sugar’s early sketches of the Rubies, was being oriented by her more senior teammates.

Even though we felt threatened by the Ruby Squad, and Eyeball in particular, Leggy had absolutely no fears hiding behind the latter and it’s more than clear their shared experiences made them more cohesive as a unit.

In that way, gems don’t seem to spend a lot of time with gems outside their class.

The very “function” of Pearls is very different from that of other gems. Their work is relegated inward into the private sphere. They attend to very specific individuals. They are always with gems who aren’t like them.

And the key to this is the value system on Homeworld.

I talk about the utilitarian nature of Homeworld a lot of the time. So in a society in which utility is one of the key aspects, having work that is visible, like the creation of buildings or the colonisation of planets, puts a high premium on certain types of gems.

Service is invisible.

It’s not as easy to measure the impact of telling people they’re great everyday has on the rest of their lives. But this is the work Pearls do. Their work makes Pearls appear like they’re of even less use, which in turn puts them lower down in the eyes of individuals.

It’s very similar to how the work of medical nurses wasn’t recognised as legitimate until very late on in the history of medicine. Nurses comforted patients, checked on them daily, and attended to them, while doctors stepped in for a diagnosis and prescribed the treatment plan.

Because one involved something tangible and the other involved the daily grind of caring for another human being, the “usefulness” of latter was taken for granted.

It was (and in many places still is) very difficult to quantify the effects of their contribution and they were viewed lowly.

2. Servicing the Diamonds

Now to the specific question: What exactly do Pearls do?

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Obligated

Author: @knockknocksoosthere as a part of the Bound series with @kpopfanfictrash and @bread-jinie

Creative Content Contributor: @baebae-goodnight (her mood boards are amazing - like all the damn time)

Rating: M - explicit sex, cursing, drinking

Word Count: 6k

Summary:  Married by obligation, weighed down by circumstance. Except for those nights when you’re both drunk, falling into bed with one another and realizing you’re human. Occasionally this happens, occasionally you fuck. Until your life changes and you realize Namjoon, the very man you’re obligated to, might just be the very man that you crave.


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Hell is other people.
— 

Jean-Paul Sarte’s famous quote from Being and Nothingness doesn’t mean what most people think it means.

“Sartre’s point was never that other people make your life hell. He was trying to tinker with the philosophical concept of "being for others,” which holds that people function as mirrors of our psychological understanding of ourselves. Chad the giant douche has been a douche his entire life, but his douchiness is reflected by other people’s reactions to him. The more people he interacts with, the more of his faults he will be forced to recognize via their actions.“

Things more important than family

I nearly drowned when I was 3. My mom had to jump into the pool fully clothed to rescue me. 44 years later, she still complains that I made her ruin her Mickey Mouse watch.

My mom broke my arm when I was 6. She tells a funny story about it. She doesn’t tell the part about when she came to me immediately afterward and complained impatiently, “Stop crying! It doesn’t hurt that bad.”

When I was in my 30′s, a doctor committed malpractice in his treatment of me, resulting in me permanently having less than 50% kidney function. Every single time I mentioned the kidney disease to my mother—panicking about what this would mean for the rest of my life, explicitly asking her for comfort and reassurance—she told me that it was my own fault for trusting the doctor instead of researching everything on my own.

Some people will tell you that nothing is more important than family.

I’m here to tell you that love is more important than family. Loving yourself is more important than family. Finding other people who offer you unconditional love is more important than family.

If your family causes you pain, then there are a hell of a lot of things more important than family.

YOU are more important than family. Always remember that. Always.

INFP Relationship Troubleshooting Guide (Guest Post)

           Being in a relationship with an INFP is probably going to be one of the most rewarding things you have ever done in your life, so, congratulations! They are quirky, romantic, shy, bubbly little introverts who have a capacity for love that is so large, it could very easily be considered a fault. However, although being in a relationship with an INFP will certainly reap many benefits (you’re about to get a book of poetry dedicated to you, songs written about you, little gifts, “I love you” texts…), keep in mind that INFPs are drained very easily. They exert so much effort into loving their significant other, that when they suspect the same amount of effort isn’t being reciprocated, an INFP can easily begin to doubt whether or not there are still mutual feelings. Luckily for you, as one with many INFP friends, I am going to tell you how to better understand, appreciate, and love the INFP in your life.

1.      They love space, but you’re the exception.

It’s true, INFPs are still introverts, despite coming across as extroverts. Normally, on any given day, most INFPs aren’t stimulated (at least, not as much as their sensor-counterparts, ISFPs) by physical touch. Lord knows they would die before they initiated it. However, just because they don’t initiate or respond to a brush against the arm or back, a kiss on the cheek, or a hug in a romantic, swept-off-their-feet sort of way, doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy it. On the contrary, INFPs are passionately affectionate creatures. Unfortunately, they are still also shy. They are constantly worried about their efforts going exactly the way they didn’t plan, so when it comes to romance, it can be safer for them to keep their hands to themselves. Go the extra mile. Put your arm around them. Hold their hand. Brush the hair out of their face. If you’re feeling extra romantic, kiss them.  Once you break the initiation barrier, it will be worth it.

2.      “Do you really mean it?”

A question that doesn’t escape an INFP’s lips often enough, yet is always in the back of their mind. Due to their dominant introverted feeling, remaining true to their character and their values is non-negotiable. However, it also makes them apt to know that not everyone is as honest as they are. INFPs might question, doubt, or even accuse your intentions of being false, or ill-placed. Be patient with your INFP, and remind them often that you do mean well. Words are special, yes, but they won’t believe unless you prove it with your actions. Thankfully, it really doesn’t take much. Even asking them how they’re feeling, or bringing up a story that they shared long ago to remind them that you care, and that you are attentive to their needs and stories. You may notice that they ask often how your day was. That is because they genuinely care for your deepest feelings. They would hold your heart in the palms of their hands and guard it through flood and fire. They have seen the darkness in the world, and have probably succumbed to it at some point in their life. Keeping up with them and making sure that they’re taking care of themselves is one way you can show them that you really do appreciate and love them.

3.      Their spontaneous, impulsive nature is the only predictable thing about them.

Don’t allow your INFP to be apologetic for the quirky things about them. Their auxiliary function, extroverted intuition, is constantly spouting strange ideas, notions, and stories that all somehow connect with what is on their heart (Fi). If one moment, you two are discussing politics and philosophy, and the next minute your INFP expresses a sudden interest in entering a Christmas light competition, don’t take it personally. They most likely weren’t bored of the topic at hand. They don’t merely have one train of thought, they have twenty-seven, and it’s up to you to keep them grounded without judging them. Let them be random. Let them be spontaneous. Let them go on tangents and rabbit trail onto something totally unrelated. If they allow that side of themselves to open up around you (because, believe it or not, most INFPs I’ve met are actually pretty insecure about their childlike spirits), you’re very special to them. Don’t take that for granted or brush it off like they’ll do that for anyone.

4.      Flirting is fun, yes, but INFPs need and crave so much more.

Don’t get me wrong, an INFP who willingly flirts is the world’s most secret, guarded treasure. However, it gets old. It’s tiring. INFPs want more out of a relationship than the physical. They crave connection and genuineness. Ask about their poetry, or music, or whatever hobby it is that they enjoy. Ask about their feelings. Talk about the universe, talk about where you see yourself in ten years, twenty years, sixty years. Throw something flirty in there every now and then, but show your INFP that you love their soul. You won’t regret it. I promise.

           There you go! Four essential tips for keeping your relationship with an INFP healthy. Have fun, be genuine, and remember that nobody is perfect. This isn’t exclusive to INFPs. You can apply those tips to any relationship with any type, but according to my INFP friends, these four are the most important and heartwarming.

Hide and Seek

Alpha!Werewolf!Sam x Omega!Werewolf!Reader -A/B/O

Summary:  You’re a bonded Omega who left your human family when you were turned. Now, a year later, your mother and father have hired an interventionist to extract you from what they assume is a cult. 

A/N: What are a/b/o dynamics

Words: 5300+

Beta: @just-another-busy-fangirl

Warnings: Pregnancy, kidnapping, dominance, violence. References to: claiming, choking, oral sex, unprotected sex (obvi), biting, rough sex, some dom/sub overtones.

Your name: submit What is this?


It’s not that you didn’t love your family, in fact it’s quite the opposite, love is the reason you disappeared. Being bitten by a werewolf meant that life as you knew it was over. You had nightmares of killing your mother under a full moon, unable to control your base instincts: ripping out your father’s heart and eating it raw under the night sky.

Telling them the truth wasn’t an option; your father’s a physiologist, your mother a nurse. They’re level headed people who at the first mention of lycanthropy would have had you committed.

You couldn’t stay. You couldn’t see a way out, so you ran.

You wrote a note. Most of it was lies, but you wanted it to seem plausible. It wasn’t in your character to just abandon the people you loved, so you had to make it seem real. You had to hurt them so they would let you go. You wrote about meeting someone you wanted to start a life with, about how they’d suffocated you for twenty five years and you just couldn’t take anymore. You told them they drove you to leave.

You cried as you set the note on the kitchen table early one brisk autumn morning, then walked out the door falsely assuming you’d never seem them again.

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