I’m turning off anons for a while.
“You’re honestly such a bitch for breaking her heart. If she commits suicide, it’s honestly your fault and I hope you feel guilty for the rest of your life.”
When I was 10 years old my dad committed suicide. What this anon said above is something my mom frequently said to me as a child. One night my mother told my little brother to start cleaning the house ‘for when the people bring the food’ and asked me to sit down next to her as she laid on the couch. She asked me ‘Do you love me?’ I said yes, and she emptied a bottle of pills in her hand, picked one up, and swallowed it. She asked me again, ‘Do you love me?’ I said yes, and she took another pill. I started crying. I tried saying ‘NO I DON’T LOVE YOU’ I tried not saying anything, I tried asking her if she loved me. Nothing worked, she took a pill every time. I cried harder, started screaming and got desperate. I picked up the phone to dial 911, and she yanked the phone from the wall and said ‘You’re gonna kill me just like you killed your daddy. You’re gonna sit here and live with it until the police come because people can smell my body rotting.’ The last thing I remember is quietly checking to see if she was still breathing as she slept.
I am someone who suffers from Anxiety and PTSD and seeing comments like this are very triggering for me. I haven’t been able to stop thinking of that night since some of you have been sending me similar messages. Please think about the things you’re saying to people on the internet. You don’t know what they have been through. We are people, after all, with feelings.