what if being happy is easier then you thought

He told me that we couldn’t fix what was already broken.
I told him that broken crayons still color.
He said no one wants to deal with that. It’s much easier to just find new crayons. Throw the old ones away.
And you wonder why I still feel like trash.
—  You threw me away.

Hello my loves! I’ve been asked a few times how I started overcoming some of my fears during recovery so I’ve thought of all the things that worked for me and could help you! ♥

What is exposure therapy? 
Exposure therapy is basically exposing yourself to the thing that scares you over and over again…until you are no longer afraid of it.

So what is it that is making you anxious or stopping you from what you want to do? what is standing between you and your dreams?

Take baby steps:
If you are socially anxious and never go out of the house, don’t go to a club with someone who just asked you out. Instead, try going out with people you are comfortable with. Start small and work from there.

Be brave:
If you always act afraid, you’ll always be afraid. Sometimes we just have to trust our power and be confident that you’ll survive this challenge.

Be uncomfortable:
We all know that our comfort zone is the “happy place”, but we have to tell ourselves that we are capable of going past it, we can handle being a little uncomfortable! It’s where all the magic happens right?

Imagine the scenario:
I always think this way: What is the worst that could happen? If that happens, what’s so bad about it? Do I die if this happens? It’s easier to handle the situation when you have imagined it instead of avoiding it, that way you can realize it’s not as bad as you thought. 

Interrumpt anxiety:
I once saw a quote that said: interrumpt anxiety with gratitude. I thought it was genius. Let other powerful emotions take over anxiety. Be curious about the beauty of this world and grateful for being able to know it.  

I hope this helps you, and remember that this takes patience and time. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate on messaging me. © freepic icon 

Love, Yumi 🌷

Stop settling for friends who make you feel like you can’t be yourself, or that you have to change a large part of who you are in order to be good enough for them.

Stop settling for a life of sitting still, of watching other people go after what they want while you sit back because you’re too afraid to try.

Stop settling for toxic social environments. If you’re invited to a dinner outing with a group of gossipy and judgmental people, politely decline. If you have to go because it’s a work thing or because you need to support your partner, go for an hour and leave. Don’t ever give more of yourself and your energy than you need to.

Stop settling for being an ‘okay’ friend. If a friend is going through a bad breakup, show up to their apartment with beer and cake and don’t leave until they’re ready for you to leave. Show up for the people who show up for you.

Stop settling for the idea that fear is always something that should be avoided. If your heart starts pounding when you think about applying for that job or signing up for that acting class or trying to make amends with that one friend, listen to it. Embrace the fear. Fear is a compass.

Stop settling for a life of being on autopilot. Of commuting to work like a zombie, of playing on your phone instead of being fully present for movie night with your friends, of thinking about what you’re going to say next when you’re talking to someone. Just let yourself relax, and be there. Something will always come afterwards, just trust.

Stop settling for the idea that happiness is a milestone to attain instead of a state of being. At some point, you must grasp that if you just keep chasing and chasing, there will always be something new to want. But if you start focusing on the joy of being, simply being, you’ll have a much easier time finding happiness. After all, it’s already there. It’s always been there.

(Source: thoughtcatalog.com)

girlmeetshit  asked:

(another prompt, sorry but I'M IN LOVE WITH YOUR FICS) Betty and Jughead got stuck in a class alone after months of their friendly break up and realises that they aren't just friends.

This makes me so happy because I was just thinking ‘I hope I’m not annoying anybody by posting all these fics’ so thank you!

Detention (aka I fucked up)

Betty couldn’t believe her luck - she had gotten detention today, the first time in her life, because the teacher thought she was looking at her neighbors paper during a test, thought she - Betty Cooper - was cheating.

She walked into the dark classroom to find Jughead sitting there, facing the teacher’s desk. Were they really the only two who had gotten detention today? 

Betty sat down two desks behind him and sat up straight. 

Jughead had broken up with Betty a month and a half ago. He had said he wanted to focus on his family - who could blame him? - but Veronica told her that she heard on good authority that Jughead didn’t think he was good enough for her.

But Betty knew  he had simply fallen out of love with her. Of course, she had slapped a smile on her face, trying to cover the hurt. She couldn’t lose Jughead entirely - if he didn’t want to be her boyfriend anymore, she needed him to be her friend. She needed him to be a part of her life.

Betty had laid in bed the entire weekend after Jughead left her room that day. She didn’t answer her phone, didn’t eat, didn’t speak to anyone. Her heart was broken.

She dragged herself out of bed on Monday and tried to put on a brave face at school.

They still hung out together, of course. Archie and Betty and Veronica and Jughead and Kevin sitting in a booth at Pop’s, The five of them in Veronica’s living room, studying and eating popcorn, Betty, Jughead and Kevin in The Blue and Gold’s office, studying the murder board.

This would be the first time Jughead and Betty would be in a room together without any of their friends.

Betty cracked open a notebook and tried to distract herself by jotting down article ideas.

Not five minutes had passed before Coach Clayton stood up from his desk “I’ve got an errand to run - no funny business. I’ll be back in five.” He called, then strolled out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Immediately, Jughead got up from his chair and sat down in front of Betty, turning around so his stomach was against the back of the chair.

“What are you in for?” He questioned, smirking.

“They think I was cheating off of Kevin.” Betty murmured, playing with her pen. “What about you?”

Jughead guffawed at Betty’s admission. “I was smoking on school property.”

“Again?” Betty raised an eyebrow.

Jughead just shrugged and pushed back his floppy hair, rearranging his hat.

Betty’s arm reached out before she knew what she was doing, moving the hair that had fallen back in Jughead’s eyes. ”Juggie, what happened?” 

There was a dark purple bruise on Jughead’s temple.

Jughead’s eyes darkened, his head hung downwards. He had forgotten about his bruise. “Dad got drunk, I pissed him off. No big deal.”

“Jughead…” Betty whispered, the word barely making it out of her mouth. She gently touched his temple.

Betty’s fingers lingered on Jugheads soft skin, tracing down his temple and onto his cheek.

They say touch has memory, and this memory was killing Betty. The memory of his skin was too much for her. Tears welled in her eyes and she looked down immediately. 

“Betty, what is it?” Jughead murmured.

“Nothing,” Betty lied, doodling on the paper beneath her.

“Bets, please don’t lie to me. Hey,” Jughead pulled gently on her chin so that she would look him in the eye.

“I just miss you, Jug.” 

“I’m right here, Betty.” Jughead said lightly. 

“That’s not what I mean.” Betty said exasperatedly. She might as well tell him the truth - he knew when she was lying.

“I know,” Jughead admitted. He still had hold of Betty’s chin and he grazed his thumb across her cheek. “I’m sorry that I hurt you, Betty.”

Betty just nodded, more tears welling in her eyes. They were words she had hoped for, had thought about, but they didn’t heal the hurt.

“I was just scared.” He said to her.

Betty looked into Jughead’s eyes, searching for answers. “Scared of what?”

Jughead took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Scared of how happy you make me - made me.” He correctly himself. “You made it easier for me to breathe. And when you weren’t around, my world felt like it was crashing down around me. And I remembered what it felt like to be alone. When the only thing you know is happiness being taken away from you, you don’t know what to do with the light in your life - so you extinguish it.”

“Jughead -” Betty started.

“I figured that you would realize that I wasn’t what you wanted. That you would leave me like everyone else does. So it was easier if I left you first.”

“Jughead -”

“Betty, I didn’t mean to hurt you - I just thought it would hurt less if I ended it on my terms, before things went too far, and that the inevitable end came and I was crushed but, I sort of fucked things up and got hurt anyway.”

“Who says there’s an inevitable end, Jughead? Who says if we make each other happy we can’t just keep being happy together? Maybe the world was trying to give us both a break.”

Jughead looked down. He was the dumbest person alive.

“I wasn’t going anywhere, Jughead.” Betty whispered. She took Jughead’s hand that still lingered on her cheek and held it in hers.  

“I fucked up.” 

Betty nodded. “Lucky for you, I’m pretty forgiving.”

Jughead’s head snapped up. He thought for sure that she had moved on.

“We could be each other’s salvation.” Betty murmured.

“Betty, I love you. I’m so in love with you. I always have been and I always will be.” 

Betty leaned forward and kissed Jughead on the lips lightly. “I love you, Jughead. We’ll be each other’s light and if you’re ever scared again, you have to just talk to me. You’re not allowed to leave me again.” Betty gave a small half smile, tentatively. 

Jughead shook his head. “I promise, Bets.”

BTS: Suga~ priorities

Summary: your boyfriend, Yoongi, takes you both on vacation to California. He gets a little too close to a fan while on a date with you, and things take a turn for the worse. Angst/fluff-ish~ 💚

To say this is one of the worst nights of your life would be an understatement. You couldn’t say the same for your Yoongi, though. It must be nice to have people at your beck and call, showering you with affection and smiles. You’d have thought that Yoongi was different and that you’d both agreed to settle down- at least that’s what he assured you, that after being friends for so long, a relationship would be the next perfect step to take.

Last week, he surprised you with a couple tickets to California, where you two would be spending the next two weeks, and you couldn’t have been happier. Working nonstop on their next album and promotions, he was tired and you couldn’t wait to get away from all of the craziness and dead lines. But things wouldn’t remain perfect for long.

There was no way to describe how disappointed you were in him, and the worst thing was that he blames it all on you. His stare is now practically burning in the back of your head, but you still refused to give him the satisfaction of looking at his face. You’d already cried out all your tears, and the doors of your suite were nearly hanging off their hinges from you bursting in to get your things, only for Yoongi to come barging in like a mad dog and demanding an explanation.

“You can’t seriously be thinking that meant anything. You know how I have to act in front of these people, you’re insane-” the rest of his yelling made no sense to you due to all the blood pounding in your ear and the fact that he he was actually making no sense whatsoever. So what if that woman was a fan? She had no right to be touching him like that, and certainly not for him to let it happen and keep a smile on his face the whole time.

“Well, excuse me if I still have my pride and don’t let people do whatever they want to me and touch me wherever they want. You couldn’t just ignore her and walk away, right? Because you’re not happy being committed to one person, is that it? Telling me would’ve been easier than making me watch as you practically threw yourself on top of her.” Your thoughts spilling out of your mouth without reason. You should’ve know he could never be tied down, and being his best friend out of all people, should’ve known better than anyone.

You heard his footsteps approaching and felt him crouching behind you, careful not to step on the broken vase on the ground. “Are you hearing yourself? You want me to completely ignore and walk away from a fan just because you wanted to go to the beach that badly? I bring you here for a little vacation and you do this to me and make a scene in front of everyone?!” He tugged on your arm, hoping to make you turn around and face him.

“Answer me, y/n.” Although his voice was much calmer now, you could tell he was still angry. You couldn’t deal with this anymore, and felt like your heart was breaking. You tugged your arm free of his grip and made your way to the closet. “Well, I’m sorry I’m such an inconvenience to you. Guess you don’t need to worry about me anymore.” You pulled your suitcase from the floor and began to pack it again. He scoffed loudly, and you can almost hear him clenching his teeth.

“That’s not what I meant, y/n. There was just no need to run out like that and making me apologize to everyone. I thought you knew what you were getting into when you agreed to be with me. You did agree to be with me, didn’t you?” His voice was a mere whisper and he sounded hurt.

You finally turned and faced him, but soon regretted it. His eyes were bloodshot and his hand looked to be bleeding. So that’s why the dresser looked broken. He seemed to be breathing heavily, and eyed you warily, as if you could just snap your finger and break him.

“Yoongi…don’t expect me to apologize. I know you have your fans and your priorities, but this was a supposed to be our time, away from everyone and everything. You know if I didn’t love you I wouldn’t have agreed to be a part of this insane life and sharing it with you, but sometimes I- we, have to come first.” You sighed heavily and let your clothes drop to the floor.

“This is exhausting. I hate fighting with you. If you want me to go, just say it and you’ll never have to see me again. Just please stop breaking my heart, I-” you were soon interrupted by him stepping closer to you and taking your face in his hands. You flinched as you smelled the blood on his hand, but looked him in the eye nonetheless.

“Y/n, I love you. Stop acting like this, please…you’re the one that’s breaking my heart since you don’t see how much I’m trying here. I don’t want an apology, I just need you to be with me. I’m not letting you go anywhere, so you better put that suitcase away. I worked hard to get us here and I’m not letting either of us waste anymore time fighting and crying and arguing.” You could almost tear up seeing how much sincerity his eyes were showing. Deciding not to make things even worse, you nodded. “You’re bleeding. It looks bad…I can’t believe your first response when angry is to always punch whatever is in your way.” You laughed, despite yourself.

He took the sudden lightness of the mood to his advantage and pressed a light kiss to your forehead, and pressed his against yours. Closing his eyes, he inhaled your scent and visibly relaxed. He shook his head slightly, and kissed you fully on the lips. “I don’t care. I want to make things right. I don’t care if I have to spend the rest of my life to do that, y/n. I love you.”

Originally posted by ultranicolet

1. Love is a powerful emotion but an overly used word. Just because one says they love you and their eyes look right into yours as they say it, it doesn’t mean that they actually do.
Judge the genuinity of their love by their actions and not their words.

2. When you’re angry, don’t write out your anger and send it to others. They may use it as written proof to manipulate situations and put you behind bars after their failed suicide attempt even though it had nothing to do with what you or what you said but because they want to ‘make you pay’.

3. Grades while not everything are important. What are you going to do with the wonderful memory of a dozen parties when you can’t move on to the next grade with all your friends or not be able to choose the electives you want to or never get a call from you dream college.

4. Once you post something online it always stays. You may delete it but the internet never does. Don’t be in a rush to put all your life online and monitor your privacy/security settings more often.

5. Click pictures. God. Click so many of them. Selfies. Group pictures. Landscapes. Apartments.Food. Moments. Right now you remember everything but do you remember anything from when you were 7? 10 years later you will be glad to have captured your life because as much as you may want to believe, your past life reduces to only the moments you remember and not all the moments you have had.

6. Strangers online can be charming. They can be a cute boy aged 18 telling you how awesome you are or a 45 year old creep in his basement telling you the same while pretending to be that 18 year old. Everyone (almost) has a Facebook page/Instagram/Twitter. If they say no, they are clearly (99%) lying to you.

7. Once the stranger online does send you their social media link, make sure you drop in a message on the profile they shared with you. It’s very easy to impersonate people online and even easier to steal images.

8. Once a backstabber always a backstabber.
Do you really think a manipulative retard like them only has one knife? They have a whole collection and your back wounded or not will always seem like a good place to stick them.
I’m not saying don’t forgive people. Forgive them but don’t let them in again.

9. Don’t carry your diary/journal to school. I know that’s when you write the most but someday you are going to slip and that day a bunch of boys will steal it, take it to the boy’s washroom, read it and bully you for the rest of your school life.
If you really must, save it like it’s your baby.

10. There are nice teachers and there are mean teachers as well.
Some teachers really do care about your well being and hence they may be a little harsh on you sometimes. But some teachers love discussing the things you told them in confidence in the staff room with the other teachers so you may want to censor what you spill.

11. That girl is mean to you because of her own insecurities. I know it’s hard to believe but you sleep a lot more peacefully at night than she ever will because you know and accept your flaws while she focuses on the flaws of everyone around her to never face hers.

12. Just because all your friends are losing their virginity at a certain age doesn’t mean you’re next in line. You may not even be in that line. You may be in another where you wait for 5 more years and that’s completely okay. Sex is great but it’s not a race. You must be accepting of your own body before you let someone else inside. Literally.

13. Adults fuck up too. Turning 18 is a mere legal recognition of being able to do certain things and not a universal ability and declaration of maturity and responsibility and wisdom.

14. Don’t let yourself go. If you see you’ve gained a little weight, exercise, eat better. Because if you don’t, it will be 5 years later and you will be looking at old pictures and thinking ‘woah, there was a time when I looked like that’.

15. Friends want what’s best for you but they want what’s better for them. Accept it and don’t be foolishly selfless. It’s you before all your friends, at least it should be unless you want to have a mental break down.

16. You aren’t as mature as you think you are to deal with guys who are a decade or half older than you. Trust me darling, you’re not, even if it feels like it. They are on paragraphs while you’re still on the alphabet and that’s exactly how it’s supposed to be.

17. Sometimes they don’t need to physically force you because mentally/emotionally they already have. And that too is abuse.

18. You don’t have to fit in a particular category or type or identify with just one or a part of your nationality/religion/race and you don’t have to be defined by a set of words because you aren’t words or classifications - you are a human being and that’s right where your classification stops.

19. Do whatever you want to irrespective of who says what because the only person who has to bear the consequences is you. In the end, even if you aren’t happy with the consequences you will know it was your choice and your sole decisions that got you there. It’s a lot easier to accept failure and other bad results and pick yourself back up when you don’t have the blame game option in your back pack.

—  creatingnikki 
Undisclosed Desires (part 6)

Words: 1.2k

Summary: You say goodbye to your father and meet with Castiel.

A/N: Constructive feedback is always appreciated. If you’d like to be added to my master tag list, let me know. The Enochian phrase “ol aziazor elasa Goaal” translates to “I love you, Father (creator.)


“I take it you’re little meeting didn’t go as planned?” Lucifer asked after suddenly appearing behind you.

“Dammit!” you shouted in surprise. “The fuck is wrong with you?!”

He pursed his lips together to keep from smiling. “I’ll take that as a yes. I tried to tell you, Princess, they’re not ever going to understand. When they look at you, all they see is me; someone who’s ready to wreck the world. So why not give them what they expect?”

You squeezed your eyes shut and shook your head. “Do you know how to shut the fuck up? Just… stop talking.”

He cocked his head at you and smiled. “You know I’m right. It’s only a matter of time.”

Keep reading

You + Me Part 2

Originally posted by hunnamsource

Originally posted by omagnetism

Part One

Note: I do not condone cheating. If your not happy in a relationship, leave. Cheating is the worst thing you can do to someone you ‘love’.
Also this part is short, there will be another part coming. Enjoy xx

“Nice to meet you.” You plastered the warmest smile you could muster on your lips.
Tara eyed you carefully but didn’t say anything before turning back to Jax.
You raised your eye brows and watched as she wrapped her arms over his shoulders.
She spoke in a hushed voice, too quiet for you to hear and Opie nudged you gently with his elbow.
You turned to him and his eyes were soft and warm, sympathetic even.
He knew how hard this must be for you.
But you flashed him a small smile before lowering your gaze.
The smoke from his cigarette lingered in the air and you wished the earth would open up and swallow you whole.
You had known you would have to meet Tara one day.
It was inevitable. No matter what would happen between her and Jax, she was still the mother of his children. Well, one of them at least. And she was always going to be a part of his life.
But you had hoped that when you did meet her, it would be under different circumstances.
You didn’t really want to meet the wife of the man you loved, and have to watch as she practically threw herself at him right in front of you.
Take a deep breath. You told yourself.
“Stay out of it.” You heard Jax say angrily.
You couldn’t help but glance up, and see the coldness in his eyes as he talked to his wife.
Her arms were still on his shoulders but her face turned into stone.
She stared at him before removing her arms and moving them to her hips.
“Say goodbye to your children before you leave.” She ordered and marched back into the clubhouse.
An awkward silence fell in her departure and you weren’t sure whether or not you should say something.
Of course, you were ecstatic that she was gone, and her hands were far away from your mans body.
But you felt sad for Jax. She was his wife. And the tension between the two could have been felt from outside of California.
Jax sighed and ran his hand through his hair before taking a long drag of his cigarette.
You met his gaze, those blue eyes full of depth always made your heart skip a beat.
“So, that was Mrs Teller, huh?”
As soon as the words left your lips you instantly regretted them.
A blush rose to your cheeks and you glanced at Jax.
Opie sniggered and a smirk spread across Jax’s lips as he shook his head.
And all three of you laughed awkwardly together.

You looked up as you heard a knock on the door.
Jax and Opie were in Church with the rest of the club, and you had snuck off to the dorm you were sharing with Ope. Somehow, you didn’t really feel like hanging out with Tara while you waited for Church to finish up.
You cleared your throat as you crossed the room.
The door swung open and Gemma stood in the hallway.
You smiled warmly at the woman you had met earlier.
“Hey Gemma. Whats up?”
She smiled back at you and scanned the room behind you, noticing the sleeping bag and pillow laid out on the floor.
“Thought you might like a drink?” She said.
You grinned widely. Maybe you would fit in in this life after all.
“Sure!” You stepped out into the hallway, closing the door behind you.
The clubhouse was swarming with people and Gemma led you over to the bar and grabbed two beers.
The room was loud and she scanned the crowd before heading towards the back corner, where an empty couch sat. She gestured for you to follow and you did, a smile on your face the whole time.
Gemma sat on the couch and took a sip from her beer as her eyes scanned the room.
You sat next to her and lifted the beer to your lips.
“So, how long have you been fucking my son?”
You almost spat the beer out of your mouth.
With a gulp, you turned to Gemma with wide eyes.
She smirked at your expression.
“Wh-what?” Your heart beat loudly in your chest.
Did she know? Would Jax want her to know? Would he want you to lie? Was she close with Tara? She was his mother?!
Questions ran through your mind but you just stared at the woman in shock.
Gemma laughed lightly and rolled her eyes.
“How long?” She asked again.
You blushed and looked away from her.
“I dont know what you’re talking about.”
Gemma studied you closely before speaking.
“I think you know exactly what Im talking about, sweetheart.”
You both watched each other carefully and you were about to speak when the Curch doors opened and the club filed out.
You both stood and watched as Jax walked out, running his hand through his hair.
“Do you love him?” Gemma asked quietly behind you.
You turned to look at her.
Her dark eyes burnt through you, and you knew in that moment that you shouldn’t lie to this woman.
“I do.”
She smirked before moving forward.
“Dont hurt him.” She whispered in your ear before kissing your cheek and walking across the room.
Across the room, Tara crossed her arms over her chest, a scowl on her face as she watched you and Gemma.

Opie hugged you as you approached the group and you thanked him silently.
He sure was making this whole situation a lot easier for you, and you began to realise why he meant so much to Jax.
He introduced you to the rest of the club and you smiled to each of them before sitting on a stool next to Opie.
Your eyes were only looking for one face in the crowd, and your heart sunk when you saw him sitting at a table with his son in his arms, and Taras arm draped across his shoulders.
She caught your eye and she glared at you before you could look away.
“Y/n?” Opie asked quietly.
You turned to him and raised your eye brows.
He rubbed his beard before he continued.
“Are you.. happy?”
You sighed and took a long swig of your beer before answering.
“When Im with him? Im happier than I ever thought possible.”
Opie nodded.”What about right now?”
You laughed bitterly. “Its easier to pretend I’m happy.”
Opie nodded once more. He knew what you meant. You both knew what Jax had been through, the demons he faced. And Opie respected that you put him first.
This was clearly not an ideal situation, for either of you.
But you knew it was hard enough for Jax, and he already felt guilty. You being upset or angry with him wasn’t going to make his life any easier. And so you plastered on your smile and carried on.
“You’re good for him.” Opie said quietly.
You smiled and shrugged.
“Yeah, well I didn’t plan to be this amazing. It just happened.”
Opie laughed loudly and threw his arm over your shoulder, and you joined him in laughter.
Jax turned at the sound of your laughter and he couldn’t help the smile forming on his face as he saw his best friend laughing with the girl he loved.
Tara scowled and stood before walking and standing in front of Jax.
He looked at her questioningly and she smirked wickedly before sliding into his lap and wrapping her hands around his head.
Her lips pressed against his and your laughter fell as you watched her kiss him.
He pushed her away gently and she stood straight before walking back to her seat.
She glared at you over her shoulder as she walked.
“You want another beer?” Opie asked you.
“Got anything stronger?”

There was a crack in the ceiling.
It wasn’t big. You could barely notice it, but if you squinted your eyes and tilted your head you could see it.
You were back in the dorm room, lying back on the bed with a bottle of whiskey next to you as you stared at the ceiling with the minuscule crack.
With a sigh you sat up and unscrewed the bottle before taking a sip.
You weren’t a big drinker, not anymore anyway.
But Whiskey was probably the only thing that would get you through this night.
You were screwing the lid back on when you heard the door open.
Jax walked in and closed the door behind him and you smiled once you saw him.
He smiled back at you before crossing the room and sinking onto the bed next to you.
You both sat in silence and you slowly rested your head on his shoulder.
His hand reached out and he squeezed your knee before his hand caressed your thigh.
“I’m sorry.” He said quietly.
“You don’t need to apologise.” You told him but he shook his head.
“I do. I know this is.. hard. You don’t deserve this.”
You lifted his head and he turned to look at you.
His eyes were full of sadness and guilt.
“Its okay, Jax. Honestly, I’m okay.” You smiled warmly at him.
His eyes bored into yours.
“I love you.” He said and you smiled and stood.
“I love you too, Jackson.” You sat in his lap, straddling him and his hands went to your waist.
His lips were soft as you kissed him and you didn’t realise how desperately you had wanted him until now.
He felt the same, and his hands explored your body as your lips moved together.
Your hands ran through his hair as you kissed him desperately and rolled your hips against him.
He growled as you continued to move your hips and his hands gripped your waist roughly.
Suddenly the door opened and both your heads snapped towards the sound.
Opie stood in the doorway awkwardly.
You blushed and stood, smoothing down your hair.
“We gotta go, brother.”
Jax nodded and Opie smiled at you before closing the door and leaving.
You blushed slightly and covered your face as Jax stood and adjusted his jeans.
He smirked at you and you both began to laugh.
“You gotta go?” You asked.
Jax nodded and moved forwards, wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Come home to me, Jax.” You said, only now realising the fear in the situation, and the possibility of losing him chilled you to the bone.
“Of course, babe. Will you be okay?” He asked.
You nodded and kissed him deeply once more.
“I’ll just hang out with your mom.”
Jax looked at you with a surprised look and you laughed loudly.
“C’mon, mommas boy. You’d better go.”
Jax smirked and kissed you once more, and you walked to the door with him.
He kissed you again desperately before he left the room and you watched him walk down the hallway.

Never Enough

Request: “Hi, could you do a story where the ready has extreme body image issues.. and Klaus finds out? Thank you! ❤️”

Notes: Girls, Boys, everyone, don’t listen to social media when it comes to body image and having the perfect body because its all bullpoop. As long as you are healthy and happy, its all good. Love yourself, or Klaus will not be a happy bunny, nor will I. If u need to talk, come to me. I am always here for you all. 

You smiled, looking down on the bed at your new outfit. After your little shopping trip with Rebekah earlier today, you were rather excited about tonights party. More excited about what Klaus was going to think. As you finished changing into the outfit, you sat down at your laptop, searching accessories that would make your outfit that little more exciting. 

You smiled in relief, knowing you had the jewellery that was being recommended. This was easier than you thought. You continued to scroll down the pages of interest and google, before the smile on your face suddenly fell. Who were you kidding? You weren’t focusing on the accessories, your eyes were glued to the size of the models, the way they looked wearing the exact same thing you were. How is it they looked so much better? You looked at your reflection, taking in every detail of the way the clothes hung on your body. You weren’t stick thin, yet you weren’t obese. But going through school years wasn’t easy. You got picked on, bad. There wasn’t a moment where you wouldn’t hear the name fat fry in the middle of the hallway, or in the middle of class. It was horrifying, and the memory of it all was bringing you to tears. 

Since you were with Klaus Mikaelson, you felt nothing was wrong in the world. He only ever spoke about how beautiful you were, and how nothing could look terrible on you. But he didn’t know how you would pull at yourself every night when you came home. He didn’t know that you would scroll through your instagram page, wishing you had the body of a supermodel. He didn’t know how you would plan to go for a run, but instead resort to eating more food because you didn’t think it was possible to lose weight. 

You looked back at the computer screen, wiping away your tears slamming the lid down shut. You shook your head, taking off your bracelets, and throwing them across the room. You got up, and stood in front of the mirror. You stood up straight, shoulders back, chest out and smiled. Yes, you are beautiful. You are more beautiful than the girls on instagram. Wait, no. What are you thinking, Y/N? You won’t ever be as beautiful as those girls. 

It was a constant fight inside your head, against yourself all the time. 

You sat down on the edge of your bed, with your head hanging forwards, letting the tears fall down onto your lap. You weren’t beautiful and you knew it. 

“Love? Y/N!” Klaus’ voice echoed through your house, and panic ran through your body. What was Klaus going to think about all of this?

Klaus knocked on the door, before slowly opening it. You sighed, knowing it was too late to do anything, and got up, “I’m in here…”

Klaus poked his head round the door, and smiled seeing you, before concern and worry filled his eyes, “Love, what’s wrong?” 

You frowned, confused as to how you were going to explain this to Klaus. you sighed, deciding honesty was the best policy, “I…hate my body. I don’t like how I look. I’m not slim, and beautiful like all the other girls. I don’t even understand why you chose me when you can have any other beautiful girl out there!” 

Klaus shook his head, making his way over to you, “For a beautiful girl like yourself, I would have thought this was the last thing on your mind. Y/N, I chose you because you are beautiful, and not only that, you are smart, and intelligent. I don’t want any of those other girls. I want you, and only you. As I have said a thousand times before, you are beautiful. Inside and out.” Klaus sighed, spinning you around making you face the mirror as he stood behind you, “You know what I see? I see a beautiful woman.” He smiled softly, as his arms wrapped around your waist, “You should love yourself, as I love you. I love every part of you, and if need be, I will show you just how much I love you.” 

He smiled mischievously, as you looked at him in the mirror. Tears built up in your eyes and turned around, “I just…I don’t see it at all…” 

Klaus placed a finger on your lips. “Shh…love, I will show you…” He sat you on your bed, slowly removing your top and placing a soft kiss on your lips. 

Why hooking-up with a musician is the easiest thing ever...and dating one can be hard, but also a blessing.

I am a loner, I always have been one. I prefer quiet evenings at home over a crowded place full of drunk people, also because I grew up with an alcohol- addict father.
But here’s the thing, sitting at home alone does not make you meet new people and people you meet at parties aren’t always the best.
I have found myself enjoying loud concert venues over loud parties, I would rather bang my head to whatever band is playing on stage than sitting in the corner of a party with a cup of liquor in my hands.
Guys are afraid of girls and intimidated by girls who go to concerts on their own, unless they play in the band that is performing that evening.
I don’t care if I have to go to a concert on my own, because all of my friends are busy or have to work the next day, I spent 6 months of my life travelling on my own to dangerous countries, I think I can handle a room full of people.
BUT, here’s the thing, apparently in this society it is not ok to go to a concert on your own, unless you want to have sex with a band member.
I found myself talking to many crew members and guitarists along the way and heard many whispers and rumors.
I might have to add here that I am not the normal skinny jeans and tee kinda person, when I go to a concert it is mostly in leather shorts/skirts and crop tees - you get the image.
For a loner that simply needs some good affection every now and then is there anything better than someone that will surely leave the next morning, if not the same night, and is surely not going to call you the next day or bother about you until he comes back to your town?
I have heard so many rumors and bad talks about me since I started being open about this and my friends get hate too, I wanna clear it up here.
I am no queen and the band guys are not perfect either.
Would you care if I left with the guy in the middle of the crowd and not the one singing on stage? Probably not.

At one point of your life or another you might consider hooking up with someone and I don’t say that getting musicians is extraordinary or makes you special, but after all they are good-looking male beings that spent a few weeks/ months with other male beings - no woman around - on the road, it makes it easier to get what you want as a woman.
Musicians are the friendliest people you will meet along your way, even if you don’t have any idea who they are or never heard one song of their band before. They try to make you feel comfortable and happy in every situation, even if it is talking drunk on the bathroom floor at 4 a.m.
A close friend invited me to a concert of two bands (I thought they were quite small and unknown, but researches showed me that one played the whole Vans Warped Tour and the other one is quite famous in the UK) and I had no idea who those bands were. That was one of the best nights of my life, I drank way to much, left the venue at 7 a.m. (walk of shame haha) and had the best and probably deepest talks I will ever have in my life with the guitarist of the main band and a crew member.
To get this clear, I did not hook-up with every band member I met along the way, that is just ridiculous and I don’t think anyone should…I mean it’s not my business, but if they really need you so bad, they could pay a hooker.
It is not always easy to get a musicians attention…I know it might come off that way, but it really isn’t. Often it is luck and being in the right place at the right time. Musicians are stubborn, they are difficult and stressed. They are tired after the concert and just want to get drunk or sleep.
Often they have to leave the venue straight after a concert, but they WILL remember you if it was a small venue. Oh and if you are lucky enough, they will still remember your name or what you wore at their last show…and if they have the day off after the next stop at your city….ohh, you get what I am talking about.
But it really is not always about sex, I have to say it again and again and again. I met so many girls, who are now friends of mine, who fell for band members. They developed feelings for the guy in a band and you might think now that they got their hearts broken, but they didn’t. Every now and then it might work in some weird, twisted way. And even if you aren’t getting married, have a house, seven kids and five dogs, it is nice to know that at one point or another that awesome, sweet guy from a different continent fell for you.
I feel that music gives us the opportunity to meet people out of our reach, to get in contact with them and maybe find something more in life.
Sometimes it will just stay a hook-up, you might be their friend with benefits (we all have been there) orrrr…you might be their more. The one they will be seen with, the one that will be in photos with the band guy .
Which brings me to my main point….dating a musician is hard, it is probably the hardest thing a woman can do.
Yes, I said it.
But it’s also the most rewarding feeling, to believe in something really breakable and see it not shatter to pieces, to see it stay whole.
You have to trust each other, you have to stay faithful (I mean, the musician has to stay faithful *cough*) and you should not be jealous or clingy at all.
I could go on and on about what you should and should not do if dating a musician, but that will take it too far.
It brings me back to my first sentence, I am a loner. Yet it was almost too much for me to date someone that is not here at all, someone I might not see for a few months. You can never be sure what he is doing at the other side of the world, if he is faithful. You will see photos of him with girls that are MUCH more beautiful than you are and you will doubt yourself. You will get hate from everyone around him, because you will never be enough.
You will never be perfect enough to reach the fans expectations.
Which leaves you with two options:
To break up with him and never date a musician ever again OR to suck it up and build up a strong armor to stand through all of this.
What is more rewarding than his smile when he spots you in the crowd after not seeing each other for months? Will it ever not give you chills when you hear him sing your favorite song after months of not hearing his voice in person? Would you really give it all up because of your own pride and insecurities? Of other people telling you what to do? Of other people thinking they know you and him better than you do?
Think about all of this before you judge someone. Think about all of this before you tweet or write or talk about the new girlfriend of your favorite musician. You don’t know their past (and you don’t know all of the truth.) You don’t know what the future will bring.

In the end, you are still talking about two human beings and not two plants, so be careful with your words and actions.
Lots of drama in different fandoms caused me to write this….think about my words before you shit-talk about the girl in the heels with your favorite musician if you don’t know her personally. She might be different than what you think. She might surprise you, you just have to give her a chance.

the girl with the leather skirt that heard more shit about her and rumors, but always ends up with the band  xo

How you dare coming back? Part 3

Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader

Featuring: Natasha Romanoff, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Clint Barton

Words: 1746

Warning: none I think

Tags: @ethereal-quiescent-meek

Request: requested by @ethereal-quiescent-meek:

“Hi could I get #16 with Tony please :)”

Note: none

Originally posted by iwantcupcakes

PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 4

If it was for Tony you would have moved back into the tower that same day but you told him you needed a few days to pack everything and also talk to your landlord to tell him you would me moving out. It took him sometime but he ended up accepting when you told him he could take Lizzie now to visit the place.

“Take care of her, please”, you begged him as soon as Lizzie ran to her room to take her teddy bear.

“Hey, she will be with Iron Man”, he smirked.

“That’s what I am afraid of” you sighed running a hand through your hair.

“I’m ready!” Lizzie exclaimed coming back. “Mummy, aren’t you coming?” She asked you.

“Of course but first I have to start packing so we can move with dad as soon as possible, alright?” You smiled at her.

“Alright”, she agreed with a nod before hugging you when you bended down. “I love you”, she said.

“And I love you too”, you said before kissing her head.

When you stood up, you and Tony looked at each for a moment and all those unsaid things suddenly appeared between you two. But it wasn’t the moment. Maybe it would never be. You sucked in some air when he took a step towards you but all he did was planting a kiss on your forehead.

“Give me a call when you’re ready”, he said.

“I will” you nodded embracing yourself.

He gave you a half smile before walking out of the kitchen. You decided to stay there until you heard the door being closed and your daughter’s voice was no longer heard.

“Oh fuck…” you mumbled leaning against the counter once again.

That really just happened? Tony Stark had appeared on your door and in less than 30 minutes you had agreed on living with him? Ok, maybe your three-year-old daughter made that choice, but you didn’t say no which was even crazier. Maybe a part of you just wanted to go back in time, but you also knew that wasn’t possible. Three years was a lot of time.

Once you composed yourself you got out of the kitchen and went straight to Lizzie’s room. Packing her stuff wouldn’t take you that long so you decided to start there.

That same night you were finished packing yours and Lizzie’s clothes. You had also packed your books and movies but there was so much left still. Maybe you could come back tomorrow with Natasha and pack everything else. But, for now, all you wanted to do was resting. Should you call Tony? It was obvious that you couldn’t take everything by yourself but maybe he was busy with Lizzie. Shaking your head you decided just to call him. He told you he would help so…

“Hello?” He answered on the other side of the line.

“Hey, it’s me. (Y/N) I mean”, you replied after you cleared your throat.

“Oh, hi, are you ready?” He asked.

“Sort of… I still have tons of things to pack but I’m tired for today so…” you bite your lip and sighed. This was so weird.

“I’ll be there in twenty. Natasha will take care of Lizzie”, he said.

“Ok, I will be here then. See you”

Before he could reply you hung up the phone and put it in your pocket. So this was really happening. After three years you were going back to the Stark tower with him and everyone else. What would the team think? What would they think of Lizzie? Would they have liked her?

Those were the longest twenty minutes of your life but, finally, there was a knock on the door. You hurried to open and smiled a little at Tony.

“Ready?” He asked.

“Yeah well… I guess we will have to go down a few times”, you said turning back to look at the three suitcases and three boxes on the floor.

“I figured you would have many stuff so I brought back up”, he smiled at you and looked behind him. Just then Steve and Clint appeared next to him.

“There she is!” Steve smiled widely. You laughed and walked by Tony to hug him tight. “You look so beautiful, being a mother suits you”, he winked.

You laughed a little and shrugged not knowing what to say. So you just turned to Clint and hugged him too.

“The girl is amazing”, he said in your ear making you tear up a little. They liked her. “But looks too much like Tony, are you sure you’re the mother?” He joked making you laugh.

“I have a vivid memory of the day she literally came out of my body so yeah, Clint…I’m sure”, you laughed.

“Ugh, gross”, Tony mumbled walking into the apartment to take one of the boxes.

“It’s the miracle of life, Stark”, Clint said following his actions. “One day you will understand”, he added.

Somehow, Clint carried two of the suitcases, Steve managed to take two boxes and you took the case left. After taking your bag from the hook behind the door you just walked out of the apartment and locked it. It was time to start a new life. Or going back to the old one…who knows. With a sigh you turned but stopped as you saw Tony standing there alone. Probably Steve and Clint were carrying everything downstairs.

“I wanted to talk to you”, he said.

“Great, yeah, I… I think we should definitely talk”, you nodded. “We should set some basic rules, I guess”

“Yeah…” he frowned. “I know this might be weird, not only for you, also for me”, he said. You nodded biting your lip. “I just want you to know that…” he sighed and looked down for a moment. “I’m so happy you accepted. I know things will never be the same between us after how we left things but…thank you for doing this. Lizzie is such an amazing kid and I can’t wait to…know her and…be a family, somehow”

“A family?” You repeated with both eyebrows raised. “Tony, the fact that I’m going to live at the same place as you do all over again, doesn’t mean we are going to be back together”, you said.

He stared at you suddenly looking death serious. Was he really considering going back together as a couple? That was just crazy.

“Rules set them”, he said before turning around and walking down the hall.

Now he was mad. Or upset. Or whatever. With a sigh you just shook your head and followed him. You didn’t care. It was impossible for you to deny the feelings you had towards Tony but it meant nothing. You could handle them perfectly.

Going back to live into the tower was much easier than what you thought. Tony had a room for you and another one for Lizzie. The two of them were close to his room in case the little one needed anything. Of course, Lizzie loved it there. She had plenty of space to run and play and she was thrilled with the idea of living in a tower like a princess.

She wasn’t the only one happy. You were too. Being back with the team was something you had missed terribly and you didn’t know how much until you were there with them again. It really felt like going back in time, even you and Tony got along, he was nice to you and you to him. This was your home and this was your family.

And the best thing of all was that everyone loved Lizzie. She was such a happy and funny girl that was always making everyone laugh. Bucky loved watching movies with her and Natasha and Steve were always fighting over who would take her to the park. You couldn’t be more grateful. As much as you loved your daughter, it implied so much work and now you have so much help to do it. Thank God.

“(Y/N), can I take Lizzie to the pool? I can teach her how to swim”, Bucky said running into your room while you were working.

“What? Bucky, she’s just 3 years old” you said frowning. It was a bit dangerous.

“C’mon! It’s the perfect age to start swimming and I swear I will take care such good care of her” he begged.

“Fine! But be careful, and tell Steve to go with you!” You ended up yelling at him as he ran out of the room, too excited to pay attention to what were you saying.

“What was that about?” Tony asked walking in the room just when you were about to go back to work.

“Oh, Bucky wants to teach Lizzie to swim”, you shrugged.

“Nice” he smiled a little. “Are you busy?” He questioned putting his hands in his pocket.

“Kinda, why?” You sighed. “What do you need?” You asked.

“Well…I’ve meaning to tell you this for a while now”, he started as he took a seat on the bed. “You’ve been living here for almost a month now. We do get on well, I think we can say we like each other. Sort of”, you looked down as you bite your lip. You weren’t going to admit that your feelings for him were developed all over again. “I know it’s been a long time after what happened, and I know we both have changed. So… I was wondering if you would like to give me another chance? We can start over and…well, see what happens” he shrugged.

His preposition really took you by surprise. Natasha had told you multiple times that she thought Tony wanted to ask you out since he missed you and still liked you, but you thought she was just teasing you. Apparently, she wasn’t. But that didn’t matter. What did you want? You really wanted to take this risk again knowing that it would be ruined forever if you failed again?

“I understand if you need some time to think about it so… just look for me when you have your answer”, he said getting up. “Or have FRIDAY to call me” he added walking to the door.

You knew it was worth the try. All those memories told you so but you were too scared. But, at the same time, you were so tired of being scared.

“Wait”, you stopped him before he walked out of the door. “Tomorrow at 8?” You said.

Putting The Dog To Sleep

Request: Happy imagine based off of “Putting The Dog To Sleep by The Antlers”

Warnings: Talk of insecurities, depressed reader

Pairing: Happy X Reader

   You sighed and downed another shot before slamming the miniature glass back on the dresser, the deliciously toxic burn making it’s way down your throat. You had been waiting up for Happy to come home for the past 3 hours, eventually getting tired of being bored and starting to drink.

   While most people turned into messes while they drank, you withdrew into yourself and it allowed you to access the emotions you had laying under the surface, waiting for moments like these to come out.

   You and Happy had been together for about 6 months and while that was longer than anyone had expected, them now being convinced that you were going to be his Old Lady, you felt a cold distance between you two.

   You loved Happy more than you had ever loved a man in your whole life but that didn’t stop you from being afraid. You were afraid that one day Happy would wake up and realize that you were nothing special and leave. It was what everyone else had done so who’s to say he’s different?

   Your drunken thoughts weren’t always so philosophical and deep, in fact that often turned to dark places that scared you as much as the next person.

   ‘Maybe I should just leave and make it easier on everyone.’ you thought, staring at the duffel bag laying in the bottom of your closet.

   ‘Just pack my stuff and leave.’

   You took a minute to weigh the options in your head, the alcohol having a large influence on your outcome.

   Before you realised what you were doing you were throwing all of your clothes and pictures, jewelry and toiletries , into the duffel bag and zipping it closed.

   As you made your way into the living room your eyes caught the only picture you had of you and Happy, sitting on the coffee table.

   You studied the picture for a moment before your knees started to shake and you collapsed onto the couch, the weight of your decision finally hitting you. You were just about to walk out on Happy. No note, no explanation why you left, just like he told you his dad had and you couldn’t do that to him.

   The truth was that you did love him but you were still so afraid of loving and trusting that your own mind was trying to destroy your relationship.

   ******** Time Skip*********

   About an hour later you heard Happy’s bike pull into the driveway.

   You couldn’t bring yourself to break the stare you had on the wall or to even greet him when he walked in the door, the numbness of your depressed state rendering your body emotionless.

   He didn’t realise he wasn’t alone until he flipped on the lights and saw you sitting on the couch, causing him to jump out o f his skin

   “What the hell woman?!” he yeelled, placing a hand over his rapidly beating heart

   “Why the hell are you sitting here in the dark?” he asked, earning a shrug from you in return.

   It was then that he saw the full duffel bag sitting next to you and his heart rate sped up again.

   “(y/n) what are you doin?” he asked, his tone calm, but if you knew Happy like you did, you could tell he was nervous.

   “I was just uh, I was gonna go for a bit.” you said softly, your tone blank as you looked at him with empty eyes.

   “Going? Where?” he demanded, perching on the edge of the couch and looking over at you.

   He looked around and noticed that all of your stuff was missing from the room and his face fell

   “You’re leaving me aren’t you?” he asked gruffly

   “I’m just trying to make it easier on you. I don’t want you to have to slowly pull away, this way we can just rip it off like a band-aid.” yous said softly, staring down at your hands that were folded in your lap.

   “What the hell are you talking about (y/n)?” he asked in confusion.

   You turned to him and stared him in the eyes, feeling the first spark of emotion all night.

   “Listen I know that one day you’re going to look at me and decided that I’m not enough and I accept that but I’ve grown so exhausted waiting for that day to come and i’m just trying to make things easier on you.” you explained softly “and don’t worry, i’ve already come to terms with the fact that i’m going to die alone so you don’t have to say anything.”

   You tried to get up and walk towards the door but you felt a hand close around your wrist, stopping you at the last moment.

   You turned to see Happy staring up at you with a look of sadness in his eyes. This was new to you and quite frankly, it worried you a bit. The few months that you had been with Happy you had seen many emotions from him but sadness has yet to be one of them.

   “Sit with me please?” he asked, tugging you onto his lap.

   Out of pure reflex you wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned into his torso as he stared down at you with a look that made you shiver.

   “I don’t know if I’ve been a shit boyfriend or if someone in your past has done that to you but I promise you that that will never happen.” he said, looking into her eyes.

   “Listen, you know i’m not good at this emotional shit but I need to tell you something.” he grunted, your silence urging him on.

   “I know we’ve only been together about 6 months but I have very strong feeling for you, one’s that i’ve never had for anyone and they kind of freak me out.” he said honestly “I guess what i’m trying to say is that I-I kind of love you and- and it would really really suck if you left me.” he said, scratching his neck awkwardly

   You felt a hesitant smile twitch at your lips as you watched him, not quite sure if you should give into the new feelings filling your body.

   He sensed your hesitance and looked at you for a minute before standing up with you in his arms, causing your bag to drop.

   “Happy, what are you doing?” you spoke softly as you looked up at him.

   “I can’t promise you that you’re not going to die alone because I can’t promise anything with my life, but what I can do is take you and love you for now and for as long as I have but you can’t do that shit to me (y/n). You can’t just leave me without an explanation.” he said, putting you on your own legs in front of the bed.

   “You can leave now and i’ll let you go, if that’s what you really want. “ he said, taking a step back from you “Or, you can stay and let me show you how much you mean to me.” he said, holding out his hand to you.

   You looked into his eyes and then back at the door.

   Listening to your heart instead of your brain for once, you chose.
   You took Happy’s hand.

Heart to Heart

“Sam, may I ask you something?”

Sam looked up from his book to find Cas standing at the head of the table. He looked concerned. Or distressed. Or upset. Perhaps it was all three. “Yeah. Of course.” He gestured to the empty chair beside him. “What’s up, Cas?”

With a heavy sigh, Cas sat down. His brow was drawn together. His hands refused to lay at rest. “Where’s Dean?” It was more of an afterthought; clearly not the question he had for Sam.

“Uh, grocery run, I think.” Sam closed his book and set it on the table. “What’s goin’ on, Cas? What’s wrong?”

Again, Cas sighed. “You… You’ve been in love, haven’t you?”

Sam’s eyes widened, and he sputtered out sounds that couldn’t quite be put together in a sentence. “Uh… What? I mean. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, I have, Cas. But what… Why?”

Cas ignored Sam’s question, and persisted with his own. “What does it feel like to be in love with someone?”

A soft smile tugged at Sam’s lips. He huffed out a laugh, and settled back in his chair. “It, uh… It feels like there’s butterflies in your stomach. You hate being away from them for too long ‘cause you start to miss them. They’re the first thing you think about in the morning, and the last thing on your mind at night.

“You want to put their well-being before your own. You… You want to see them happy and okay, no matter what. Hearing their voice makes you smile. Seeing them after being away makes your heart skip a beat.” He paused and sighed, letting a wistful smile pass over his face. “Being around them makes breathing feel easier… Makes the world seem brighter.”

Sam fell silent, and Cas remained quiet for a long while. He let Sam’s words swirl through his brain, and rattle themselves into a rational thought. Finally, he leaned forward. “Sam?”

“Yeah, Cas?”

“I believe I’m in love with Dean.”

Imagine...Telling The Winchesters About Your Past

Originally posted by awkwardsamw

Request: do you think you could do one where dean (or sam) finds out that the reader has extreme depression and mental problems because her parents were actually demons in disguise and that’s why she became a hunter?

Pairing: Sam x reader

Warnings: implied prior abuse

“You’re quiet tonight,” said Sam, taking a seat beside you on the motel bed. You shifted away from him, finding the floor more interesting to look at. “I know you don’t like demon hunts but you got that kid out. No one got hurt.”

“I don’t want to talk about it Sam,” you said. You saw Dean raise an eyebrow as he plopped down on his bed.

“You’re going to tell one of us about whatever underlying issue you have with demons is someday,” said Dean, throwing back his covers.

“Baby,” said Sam, rubbing his palm into your back, his fingers tickling your neck. “You trust us right?”

“Of course I do,” you said, lifting your head up to see Dean sitting up in his bed.

“I can go drive around in Baby if you feel more comfortable talking to Sam about it,” said Dean, waiting for your cue.

“You’re both my guys,” you said, moving closer to Sam, his large arms pulling you into his lap, long legs wrapping around you, making you safe. “Sam’s kind of guessed this but I get…sad sometimes.”

“Yeah, we uh, we noticed,” said Dean, keeping his voice soft.

“Not sad like you think of sad. It’s more of a permanent state for me and it’s either bad or less bad,” you said, feeling Sam’s head rest on yours. “Like right now, I’m not happy. But it’s not so bad because Sam’s all around me.”

“Okay,” said Sam gently, giving your body a little squeeze that both said he thought nothing was wrong with you but that he’d help in any way he could. 

“I guess, I don’t trust you both the way I want to,” you said, watching Dean tilt his head curiously. “I don’t know how to trust fully like you and Sam. The whole demon thing ties in with that.”

“That’s okay too,” said Sam in your ear, making you remember what happy was in that moment just to have him want you.

“My parents weren’t hunters,” you said. “More like…demons pretending to be my parents. I was a baby when this demon couple found them half-dead after a car accident. They finished them off and popped into their new bodies. They were a little surprised to find out there was a six month old waiting at home.”

“You six month old babies get it rough, don’t you?” teased Dean, looking at Sam who scolded him. “Sorry, keep going.”

“They weren’t what I would call good,” you said, leaning back into Sam. “They screwed me up pretty good and really screwed me up when I found out the truth. They thought they could get some of their humanity back by raising me or something.”

“You got the short end of it,” said Dean, looking at his lap. 

“Y/N,” said Sam quietly. “We’re your family now. Dean and I, our lives were messed up because of demons too. You don’t have to let it keep a hold over you.”

“I want to feel normal, to know what normal feels like,” you said, looking over to Dean who had a sad smile on his face.

“I think we can help with that,” said Sam.

You woke up one morning, months and months later, looking over at a sleeping Sam in bed, hair in his face, snores escaping him.

You smiled.

It’d taken some time for you to learn that normal was a range, not a set thing. Normal people got in funks, got sad, upset and Dean so conveniently pointed out one day, you were hunters. Hunters weren’t normal.

It was strange but that comment helped more than you trying to fit yourself into what you thought the world needed you to be. Sam told you to be yourself, don’t try to make anyone happy, including him.

Without all the pressure you put on yourself, things got easier. You weren’t sure you’d ever fall into that normal you’d imagined for yourself but easier was a start.

A start that had helped lead from your first thoughts in the morning being Sam would leave you any day now to yeah, he was right, you deserved him.

@charliebradbury1104 @everyday-supernatural-af @squirels-angels-and-moose @youwerelikeadream @drugpug @darkx143 @kristaparadowski @tom-is-in-my-tardis  @tanithlowisabamf @smoothdogsgirl @dancingalone21 @ktrivia @demonic-meatball @feelmyroarrrr @cojootromuelle@illisea  @gallifreyansass @fangirl1802 @itstheprincess @casgetoutofmydiddlydarnass @mogaruke @secretlyfurrydragon @ria132love @heycassbutt-67 @aingealcethlenn

Thoughts of You - Jumin Han x MC/Reader

Rating: PG13 for bed cuddling & slight innuendo

Summary: It’s just a habit of yours to sleep over in my house. It’s supposed to be a calming view, but I ended up having thoughts of you, which is quite agonizing sometimes. No spoiler, but I personally think you have to play Jumin’s route in order to understand his character post meeting the MC.


Note: Jumin Han’s POV

Lately, I’ve been losing quite much sleep. I’m very used to drinking three shots of espresso to keep me awake and focused on piles of documents I have to take home to prepare for the meetings scheduled on the next day.

But with you, it’s very different; the moonlight is now shining on those smooth, silky strands of yours. It’s soft, yet much more energizing than the dark-roasted espresso I took last night, when I was in need of you but you couldn’t come, because you had to finish your own thesis you’re going to defend in the near future.

You can’t focus when you’re with me, you give all of your attention to me; so do I. But you are my half. Whenever we’re apart, I feel very anxious. Especially when you went MIA for seventy-two hours last week. Well, I love the box of roses and the silk tie that you gave me as my birthday present then but you indirectly created havoc in my department because I almost went insane. I told you, “please don’t do that again” for so many times after that, but I didn’t know whether you listened to me or not.

You’re carefree, but caring. You put others before yourself, maybe that’s why you’re very understanding towards me. But then again, you’re very carefree, and kind. Do you have any idea how much I hated it when you comforted Zen in the chatroom and on the phone because he hadn’t been offered for a new role for quite some time? He was very flirtatious because well, he is and that’s his personality. I know you were just being kind and responsive towards his sugar-coated words, but it hurts just to imagine how strong his gravity is to pull you away from me.

I approach the bed, and stroke your hair to make sure that you’re real. Every strand of yours is now touching my nerve endings, telling my brain that you’re really here with me. Your usually soft skin is a bit dry, maybe because it’s mid January and I turned on the heater. If I turned off the heater, the chilling air will trigger your cold receptors and wakes you up, ruining the serenity you radiate when you sleep.

I wonder if there’s something I can do to prevent your skin from drying, because I know how much you hate it when I caress your cheek and I tell you about it, even though the skin will go back to normal once you rub the moisturizer you use in daily basis. You’re already buried under multiple blankets, I can tell that you can’t be separated from the warmth that is protecting your sleep.

I keep asking myself, “can I be part of the warmth?”


“can I be the warmth that protects you?”

The mattress shakes as you move your body, as I now face your back and your hands are now coming out from the layers of blankets that’s been covering you, bare, demanding me to hold your tiny upper extremities. I want to hold you so badly.

It’s so hard to contain myself as I have vowed that I wouldn’t live together with a woman before I’m pronounced as her legal husband. But I’ve planned to do so in the very near future, the heart-shaped diamond ring that I put on your right ring finger says it all. You have implied so many times before that you want me, you want me more than just the drunk make out session we did just some days ago.


You mumbled my name in your sleep. I was about to leave the room, but you changed my mind.

I sit on the other side of the bed where I can see your face clearly, decorated by your pale strawberry lips that I always love to kiss. You seem to be having a dream. I think it’s a good dream, but I don’t want any men other than me to run freely in your beautiful, but unpredictable head.

So I take that bare, cold hand that has been coming out from the blanket for quite long.

And you surprisingly pull me, making me fall to the bed, ended up lying down on the bed.

“______? I thought you were asleep..,” I can finally see your round, hazel eyes again. They’re a bit hazy since you were asleep just seconds ago.

“Jumin.. I had a bad dream…,” you’re still collecting your consciousness when you talk to me.

I don’t want you to feel even the slightest pain, so I embrace you on the bed as a reflex.

“Calm down, Princess.. what is it?”

“Get in the blanket, Jumin.. it’s cold…” I didn’t realize that I’ve complemented the layers of duvets with my hands.

I guess you think that my temperature is higher than the duvet, especially when I touch your skin. You need the warmth, and I want to become it. I can’t stand it. I can’t stand you indirectly demanding for me too long.

The moonlight is now gone, covered by thick clouds that will soon bring the rain, or perhaps snow. The lights in the room are all turned off since it’s your habit to sleep in total darkness. I wonder if there’s anybody who can watch.. I wonder, is God watching? Or maybe God is purposely letting us immersing into each other’s world tonight?

I dare to put myself into the innermost layer of the duvets that you purposely let loose. I want to be the warmth that protects you, yet I find myself soaking in your delicate warmth instead. I hold you tighter, kiss your forehead, and feel very pleased that you care to respond with your beautiful smile even though you’re probably half asleep now.

“Jumin..,” you mumbled my name again, your head drowns into my chest.

“Kiss me..”

I unconsciously lower my body so my face can face yours. I can feel your breath sneaking through my lips, creating a gravity that pulls my lips onto yours. It’s sweet. It’s tantalizing. It’s challenging. It’s crawling through my nerves.

It’s exciting, as I now can’t contain what I’ve been holding back ever since I met you for the first time. I was afraid of bothering you, but you surprisingly reply my kiss, with your arms latching on me. My hands shift to your back, holding you tighter as your legs are now around my waist.

You open your eyes again. Albeit you seem so foggy, I can still see my reflection in your diamond eyes. The reflection of me, filled by plenty thoughts of you. Thoughts of your mesmerizing beauty, thoughts of the things that brought us together, thoughts of our past, thoughts of you staying with me until God put one of us to eternal sleep,

and thoughts of you leaving me. Disturbing, but probable. You’ve seen my flaws, and you’re always very tolerant about it. I’m such a lucky man to have someone as patient as you to be in my life, yet I always wonder, what if my luck runs out? What if you actually hate me and hold back all of your thoughts of my weaknesses? What if you can’t actually live with it?

What do I do, if I have to live without you?

“Jumin, you’re still alive, aren’t you”

You pinch my nose to clarify yourself. I chuckle.

“You’re always funny, Princess..,” I said. Then you smile, pressing your lips on the gaping mine. It’s complicating my thoughts as they start to stimulate my lacrimal gland, dropping little drops of salty water on my cheeks, which makes her brows furrow.

“Darling what is it?” Her small fingers wipe the tears on my cheek that I’m trying to hold back. It’s really hard. Having my emotion burst is very annoying.

I don’t want to make you worry like that. I snake both my arms over your back until you can’t see my ugly frown. Being around you actually makes it easier for me to calm down, despite of the worries and many other thoughts are still lurking in my head.

“_____,” I try hard not to sound helpless. “Please don’t leave me,” said I as this familiar sensation of anxiety haunts me back, after months I’ve thought I’ve secured my place in your heart.  

However, my fears are followed by your light, cute laughter.

“Jumin, no!! Haha!”

Confusion and relief mixed together, both gazing into what seems to be happiness that you’re reflect, no, that you’ve been reflecting ever since you popped up into my previously bland and monochrome life.

“Don’t you dare to leave me too, Mr. Director! You might be able to get anything in life, but don’t enter my dream and suddenly make out with Zen in front of me!”

Wow, I never expected that coming. You did mention that you were having a nightmare, though. It was upsetting, but considering it’s you who said it, I think it’s safe to say that it’s quite hilarious as well.

I bitterly chuckled and sighed for a while before replying you.

“Such a bad girl, aren’t you? What kind of wild fantasy have you been imagining?”

You put your puppy eyes on, as you know that you’ve been behaving badly, and you need to learn a lesson through a little punishment.


WOW. I’ve never thought I’d finish this. It’s my first fanfic after almost 7 years lol I already bid my writing skills farewell;_;

Anyway I admit that I kinda went quite overboard in this, so I really appreciate if you guys want to give feedback on this!

I also want to make the smutty part two but it’s gonna take long since exams >

anonymous asked:

So I'm into a boy and I think he's into me (I have ridiculous anxiety and read way too far into other people's behavior so idk)but I know that even if he did like me back I probably wouldn't date him just because I'm not in a good emotional state right now and it hurts? Cause the thought of him being with someone else hurts and the thought of us not seeing each other(we don't go to the same school rn but we will be in a year) hurts and I want to make him happy but i can't even keep myself happy?

jules: i think the best thing for you right now is to focus on yourself. relationships are much easier when you feel more at ease personally. but, it might be a less intimidating prospect once he is attending the same school as you!

remi: just wait it out and see what happens. it seems clear to me that whatever you may choose to do, you aren’t ready for what happens next. so the safest option is to wait things out and see. if he does end up being with someone else then that’s more than okay because you might find that you like someone else as well.

“You’re never strange.”
“Don’t ever change…”
“You’re all I’ve got… No matter what…”

I really really wanted to do another animatic, and I ALSO wanted to do something of Stan and Mabel being their sweet selves, and this is what came out of it!!!
So here you go!!!! Ten hours of work into one minute!! I’m so tiRED BUT ALSO REALLY REALLY REALLY HAPPY

(Also!! It’s s bit easier if you just imagine “papa” and Grunkle Stan and “daughter” as niece!! 😂😂😂)
My open letter to Kaeyi

Hi Kaeyi,

I’m kinda’ just another fan on the internet but I wanted to write something directly to you. This is pretty much just to let you know that you’re not alone in what you’re going through right now. I’m sure that you already feel so much support from your fans and the community, however the reason for me posting this is because I share a very similar experience. Maybe in writing this down I can also feel like I’m not the only one feeling this way.

Over a year ago me and my ex-fiancé sat and watched the very first video on ITLD and it caught our interest. As we watched more and more of yours and Martyn’s videos we realised that the reason we enjoyed them so much is because it was like watching parts of our own relationship over. We both share some traits of both you and Martyn and since we’d already done the things you were vlogging about in those videos it was extremely nostalgic and heartwarming to watch you both experience those things too. As time went on I realised that I personally could relate a hell of a lot to your experiences. I don’t have a chronic illness, I have however had to deal with not being able to work for other reasons, I lost a lot of my own independence in the past few years and felt like I was losing my ‘true self’, there’s probably a long, long list of the life experiences we share based on what I know about you in your ‘Draw My Life’ video and the things you’ve spoken about in your vlogs, which is one of the many reasons I enjoyed your youtube videos so much.

A few months ago me and my fiancé realised that we’d spent a lot of time living as friends and in realising that we decided to break up. Hearing the news of you and Martyn today going through that exact same thing was like remembering my own break up all over again. I know how much sadness you both must be feeling right now, your heart literally aches in your chest because there’s no anger there to feel towards the other person. There’s love, but not the kind of love other people expect from you and I know all break-ups hit hard, but when there’s no dislike or resent for each other it puts your mindset in a whole other place entirely. It sort of feels like you’re doing the wrong thing even though another part of you is telling you that it’s for the best. I felt that too and I hope you remember that it’s okay to cry, to hold each other, to rely on each other for support. You’re not holding on by doing that, you’re making sure you don’t get crushed under the weight of the world and how different it is apart. No matter what people say its never “easier” to break ties completely, or shrug each other off. Mine & my ex-fiancé’s friendship is unbreakable and as much as family and friends tell me that friendship won’t last, that “you can’t be friends with exes”, I’ll be damned if I don’t give 110% into making it work. You won’t always cry at the thought of it 'not being as it were’. You’ll learn to love and respect each other in a way where you’re both happy. It’s so incredibly sad and three months later I’m not healed, but I will heal, and you will too. At the end of it all we both seem to have somebody who will carry us through anything life throws at us, despite what happens between you both. Not many people get to have a relationship with a best friend and come out the other side with that friendship still intact and as much as society says it would never work I’m pretty certain we can break that mold.

In summary I just want you to know that you’re not alone in the way you feel right now. It will feel like everything is coming crashing down all at once, just remember, “You can do anything, but not everything." 

And finally, thank you for giving so many people an insight into your life, for being so very real and honest in your experiences and never hiding away from your fan base. I’m sure that you’ve made so many others feel like their “best friend I never had” and they related to you just like I did. I really do wish both you and Martyn all the luck in the world.

Antonia-Louise. x


Hey There

For the past month or so, Tim has been in and out of a local cafe in Gotham. At first, it was for the food and the quiet/friendly environment in which he could study in. The owners are some of the nicest people he has ever met so he really enjoys coming here. When he found out they had a daughter his age it became another reason for him to pop in. He is yet to speak to you, mostly because he is shy and nervous, he doesn’t want to seem like an idiot. Tim has never been good at this whole talking to girls thing, he wouldn’t even know where to begin. That’s why he turned to Dick for some advice, he has been in this exact position before. It’s hard to believe Dick would ever have problems talking to girls, his charm alone is enough for them to swoon. 

Tim sits down in his usual spot, getting out some of his books so that he looks like he is doing something, plus the extra studying couldn’t hurt. Not too long after he sits down Mrs Y/l/n comes over to take his order with a huge smile on her face as always. 

“Hello, Timothy. Nice to see you, what are you having today?” She gets her pen and pad at the ready. 

“Hey Mrs Y/l/n. I’ll have the usual please.” He replies politely.

“One burger with fries and a Pepsi, got it.” She scribbles it down to keep herself right. “Studying again, are we? You ought to give yourself a break every now and then, that’s what I keep telling my Y/n. You both work too hard.” 

“I’ll make sure to take a break.” Tim ensures her and with that she gives him a nod before getting on with her work. 

As he waits for his food he decides to get started. He lifts his head up for a moment and his eyes meet with yours from across the room. His heart seizes up in his chest because you are actually looking directly at him. He is further surprised when you smile and wave at him. You actually recognise him?! Tim smiles and waves nervously back. When you turn your attention back to your work Tim takes a deep breath and ruffles his hair, still in disbelief that you noticed him. He then fixes his hair quickly after messing it up slightly. No one has ever been able to make him feel this nervous before, this is all still rather new to him. 

Every time he finds himself looking up you are also glancing over in his direction. He wonders what goes on in your mind when you look at him because when he looks at you his heart feels weak and he is taken aback by your beauty. His thoughts are interrupted when he sees you getting up from your seat, are you leaving? No, you can’t be because you haven’t packed your things away, instead, you have them tucked under your arm and oh god you are heading towards him. Before he can react you are already standing there. 

“Hey there. Can I sit down?” You look at the empty chair across the table.

“Hey.” Tim pauses and looks up at you. “Sure you can.” 

You make yourself comfortable and keep your eyes locked with Tim’s baby blue eyes. He is far too adorable for you to handle. “It’s Tim right?” You ask even though you already know the answer. 

“Yeah. That’s right. That’s me, Tim.” He stammers on his words. This is exactly what he worried about and wanted to avoid; looking like an idiot in front of you. He just can’t believe you are sitting and talking to him, is he dreaming? Surely this can’t be real? With one hand under the table Tim takes a moment to pinch his thigh just to be sure that he wasn’t dreaming and he wasn’t. 

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