what i truly feel for meg

anonymous asked:

What i really hate, truly hate about FG is how everyone abuses meg. Peter always beats her up, she's bloody and broken. Lois doesn't give a crap about her. Stewey keeps mocking her. Chris is a mesh bw lois and peter. And This hurts so much, bc I'm the "ugly" kid and only daughter in my fam; fat, unhealthy, anxiety ridden. And while nobody hits me or anything, I'm often the butt of all jokes & health policing, I'm never taken seriously, "oversensitive". I see meg and I'm afraid for myself...

I feel you.

My situation is similar. My dad loves me but my parents are divorced and lives in the city. My mom is either extremely annoying and nitpicking or pretends I don’t exist. My sister is extremely abusive.

I’ve only seen a few episodes of Family Guy but what I’ve seen I hate.

-Mod Egg
5

8x17 ”Goodbye Stranger”
The Unicorn

Posted as part of the Series “Of Blood, Bone and Darkness”:
A Carver Era Rewatch Hiatus Meta-Series

“I laughed, I cried, I threw up in my mouth a little…” - say what you want about Meg. Of course she has done incredibly horrible horrible things, but this moment here is one of my favourite Meg moments, because I feel for the first time she is completely real. Not wearing any mask, but showing her true self. And also showing that she may be a demon, but that it doesn’t need a cure to remind a demon of its humanity. I truly think this is is one of the strongest scenes of Meg. And the small but important word about “her unicorn” - something commonly associated with something pure and innocent (therefore also the unicorn in S11 in the episode “Just My Imagination”) really kind of drives that home. Because while Castiel of course is far from a saint and also did horrible messy things, I suppose in comparison to something like Meg, for her Castiel, a fallen angel of the lord would have to count as one of the purest and most innocent beings she ever met and on top also was taken care of. I suppose in a way and even though of course Meg did what she did in S7 to save her own hide, she looked after Cas and Castiel when tending to her wounds earlier in the episode repays the favour.

anonymous asked:

Okay what was up with Dean's shit in season 7? Like right when Cas remembers who he was in 7x17 Dean is all "you did the best you could" and then in 7x21 Dean is throwing everything back in his face and is an overall asshole. I've seen both episodes like 4 times each and I still don't get it. I ship destiel but in the show it seems like Dean and Sam only care about Cas when they need his powers. Idk thoughts?

Hey Nonny, 

Its funny that you ask me this as this is the second ask I’ve had recently about Dean’s behaviour towards Cas in the series (the other ask being here).

I actually think that the answer to both scenarios (Dean’s behaviour at the end of season 7 and Dean’s behaviour in 8x22) are similar. You have to really think about what makes Dean tick and his base personality traits to understand his reaction to Cas in both these episodes.

In 7x17 Dean was in shock over his best friend and love of his life seemingly coming back from the dead. He is clearly hurt by Cas not remembering him, but he pulls it together to get Cas because Sam needs him and we know that Dean forgave Cas when they had this conversation:

 “If you remember, then you did the best the could at the time.”

“Don’t defend me. Do you have any idea the death toll in Heaven? On Earth?We didn’t part friends, Dean.”

“So what?”

“I deserved to die. Now, I can’t possibly fix it… So why did I even walk out of that river?”

Maybe to fix it…” Then Dean hands Cas his trenchcoat. The symbol of who Cas is, that Dean has been keeping with him from stolen car to stolen car as symbol of his hope and devotion to his friend who he loved and mourned for.

This proves that Dean had forgiven Cas for what happened in season 6. Dean forgave Cas the moment he walked into that river. The moment Dean realised his friend was gone.

in 7x21 the BIG difference is that for Dean, with all the stress they are under with the Leviathans, now he has to deal with the fact that his best friend, the only one who can help them, is crazy. Dean couldn’t handle Cas’ madness. 

We know from 7x17 that Dean has forgiven Cas for what he did, therefore it is not Cas’ mistakes that lead to Dean’s anger in 7x21. Dean’s anger is not anger at all, its frustration. He literally just got Cas back, he had his hopes and dreams handed back to him and yet in the space of an hour or so they were taken away. Dean wasn’t able to deal with Cas’ madness at all. So he acted out with anger and took it out on Cas.

Frustration has its way of turning into hurtful words and bitterness even if we love someone so much it hurts… I have experienced this first hand watching my mum care for my dad. Sometimes she snaps, gets angry and says something she later regrets. Now my dad is in no way crazy, but cancer is a bitch and he is forgetful and clumsy and not exactly easy to live with. Dean, for me, acted exactly how someone who isn’t coping with a loved ones illness would act. Sam didn’t act out at all did he? Because whilst he also loves and cares for Cas, he is not so totally emotionally invested and devastated by Cas’ condition that he can’t cope. The overly emotional character at the end of season 7 was Dean. When you compare his reactions to that of every other character regarding Castiel, its obvious.

Not to mention that on top of all those emotions, Dean has to deal with the fact that Cas’ attention throughout the episode remains wholly on Meg the demon who once possessed both his surrogate father and his brother. How do you think it makes Dean feel that as soon as he turns up he finds Cas all attached to Meg and calling her “Thorny Beauty” and only asking if she is okay and ignoring Dean whilst the angels were after them?

On top of THAT, he then has Hester shouting about how Dean broke Castiel and that “as soon as Castiel laid a hand on you in hell he was LOST!” I mean honestly that was just NOT a good day for Dean like AT ALL.

The best way to really gauge how the Winchester’s truly feel in times of conflict like this, is never to take Dean’s actions at face value, but instead to look at what Sam does:

“ I know you never did anything but try to help. I realize that, Cas, and I’m grateful. We’re all grateful. And we’re gonna help you get better, okay? No matter what it takes.”

Sam is displaying the truth of both Winchester’s feelings here. But Dean can’t voice it. He is too emotionally vulnerable at this point in time. We have to wait until the final episode to really get what Dean truly feels on the situation:

One of the first things Dean asks Cas in 7x23 is “Why did you go to Meg?” Which is more proof that Dean was jealous of the whole Cas/Meg thing.  Then nearer the end of the episode he says this:

“ Bottom of the ninth, and you’re the only guy left on the bench… Sorry, but I’d rather have you, cursed or not.”

Because even after the anger and the emotional outbursts, Dean still wanted Cas by his side, even when he thought Cas wouldn’t be able to help him in his condition. It wasn’t ever about using Cas for his powers, it was about having him there because needed him. 

And if that isn’t enough proof for you, we have the entirety of season 8 to then back up that claim.

5: Who Cares and Why?

Ever since I can remember, masculinity has been questioned and challenged. Both mine and the men around me. For some reason, unknown to me, when someone challenges or goes against the typical idea of what a man is supposed to be, or of how a man is supposed to act, the world starts to crumble just a little bit. Or so it seems. While I like to believe that I live in a progressive society that is open to change, I cannot help but remember and acknowledge all of the criticism I have been exposed to directed toward men who don’t fit a certain mold. As with women, men are born and immediately assigned a role. Immediately wrapped in a blue blanket because that is a “boy” color. We are raised to believe that playing sports makes us more of a man and that liking something artistic like dance or painting makes you feminine or even gay.


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Masculinity has never been so fragile to the point where a shower loofah needs to be labeled for men because it is apparently not very manly to use a loofah. If we want to wear tights or leggings they need to be called “meggings”. Flowers belong to women. Fashion belongs to women. Caring about your skin is feminine. Candles belong to women. Having the pink iPhone 6 is some kind of rebel against society that makes men feel guilty. I won’t go any deeper than this for now.


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I am not sure what the purpose of my rant is but I truly wonder….who cares and why? In my youth I even judged people on things like this and while I am well beyond that phase of life I still wonder why did I even care? A man wearing a pink shirt shouldn’t disrupt another man’s (or woman’s) day or even life. This can go with anything I suppose but I have a terrible time understanding why a person who is happy and confident (dare I say brave) enough to express themselves a certain way, without harming anyone, becomes a danger to society somehow. None of us asked to be born at all and it seems a little unfair that we are immediately told how to live our lives.

When I was very young my favorite color was pink. For years and years, I loved pink flamingos, my favorite power ranger was the pink one, yaddi yadda. I was criticized and questioned so often because there was a color that made me happy. What the hell? Criticized to the point where I didn’t even want to like the color anymore. I started feeling ashamed for this as if I were doing something wrong or harmful. I started to lie and convince myself that I liked red or blue more. I am happy to say that I now could not care less about that sort of criticism and I do not feel like less than a man for liking shit.


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A big thank you to the great people of the internet and to celebrity youth who have made it okay to be yourself, carefree, unapologetic and still confident.

A lot of my opinions here parallel toward other topics like feminism, religion, politics and more. The purpose of this post was not to upset anyone, so I hope that does not happen but I will not be apologizing because I am not sorry. Even still, no disrespect to anyone or their views, just sharing mine.

Stay lit,

- Lackwhen

A FEMINIST ANALYSIS/CRITIQUE OF PHANTOM OF THE OPERA:
The truly unfortunate thing about the Phantom of the Opera is that despite its potential for a being a feminist story (since it features a female protagonist like fuck yeah), it fails absolutely miserably by making her what I am dubbing a false protagonist. Christine is
1) clueless and delusional
2) childlike and thus easy to discredit
3) fetishized and objectified because of her talent
4) reckless and thus in need of “protection.”
Though the story is told through Christine’s perspective, she has no agency or capacity to change her own fate – the end of the story is in the hands of everyone else.

Let’s start with this intense need for everyone to protect her. From Raul to Meg to the Phantom in a really fucked up way (in that he feels he is the ONLY one who can truly protect her and will thwart everyone else’s attempts even if it means hurting her in the process), no one in Christine’s life sees her as having any control or capability to make good decisions. Instead of working with her to make choices that will benefit her physically and emotionally, they focus on keeping her rooted in place as a dancer, singer, lover, best friend – whatever makes them feel more comfortable, with complete disregard for what Christine wants.

This includes the Phantom of course. To him, Christine is a fantasy devoid of any human characteristics except for the ones which directly pertain to loving him. Keep in mind that the only time he becomes angry with her is in the small moments where she actually just wants to do HER OWN FUCKING THING. But also, the other people in her life might not feel the need to protect her if she didn’t feel such a reckless desire to throw herself into the hands of maniacs in the first place.

Let’s move on to my least favorite part of all this fuckery: the daddy issues (dun dun DUN). Christine’s desire to be with phantom starts out as something totally innocent-appearing: she misses her father. It’s cute right? Kinda sweet. But when she thoughtlessly follows a ghost into the unknown catacombs of the opera house without a thought we have to question the health of that relationship. Then, when she demonstrates undeniable sexual attraction for this father-ghost-person we have to REALLY question that relationship.

Ah there they are – the “daddy issues” (henceforth to be known as DIs). DIs are the media’s absolute favorite way to discredit a female character. Not only does her emotional attachment to a parental figure make her seem somewhat pathetic and incapable of letting go, but we automatically attach to her the quality of being childlike: the downfall of so many high-potential women in literature.

So what happens when we see Christine as childlike? Not only does it add another level of creepy fetishization to the Phantom’s attraction to her, but it gives absolutely every other person in her life a seemingly-legitimate reason to disregard her desires, emotions, and actions. Suddenly they have an excuse to want to protect her – she is a child, thus not a complete person, and thus incapable of choosing her own fate.

This “not a complete person” crap shows up in other ways of course. Christine is highly valued in the opera house for her performance abilities and her beauty. But….that’s it. Labeling Christine as an amazing singer makes it that much easier to let the label of “human being” fall by the wayside. Here of course is the root of the problem: objectification. By viewing Christine as an incomplete person, or not really a person at all for that matter, suddenly everyone in her life feels justified in the shitty things they do to her. “Of course we need to control her: she’s not a real person.” “Of course I need to protect her: she’s not a real person.” “Of course she must be mine: she’s only a thing after all. Not a real person.”

Christine could take so much awesome control over her own life. “You can’t treat me that way just because I work for you.” “I’m not going to follow you down there that’s weird.” “Put your sword away asshole I got this.” “Let us go, this is fucked up and you’ve got some issues to work out.” But she doesn’t. SHE DOESN’T. She allows all of the shitty things that happen to her to just happen and let’s everyone else do the saving. Even at the end of the musical, how does she convince the Phantom to let them go? She kisses him. She shows the broken man how broken he is the only way a woman can: by loving him (uuuugh).

Maybe Christine somehow feels she deserves all of these awful things in her life. I mean the story was written in France in the 1800’s so the author probably DID believe women deserved all this shit for feeling desire because yoooo misogyny. Let’s punish women for feeling sexual desire – haha CLASSIC male authors.
Nevertheless, Christine has no agency, no critical thought process, and no belief in herself, and that is not the kind of female protagonist I want in my life.

Little Women: Josephine March [ENFP]

Extroverted Intuition (Ne): Jo loves new ideas and experiences. She has “ten stories in her head” just thinking about the money she could earn by writing for newspapers. Her time is spent doing a wide variety of different things that all spark even more ideas: running an in-house “newspaper,” writing immense novels full of daring deeds and sinister schemes, reading immense volumes of books, daydreaming about her future as a writer, and organizing plays. Everything captures her imagination and excites her. She is quick to pick up on the connections between people (Meg’s affection for Mr. Brooks, Laurie’s romantic overtures, etc) … and doesn’t always like them.

Introverted Feeling (Fi): She values the things that she loves most, and that have special meaning in her life – her sisters (“I could never love anyone as I love my sisters”). Jo feels possessive of them; she wants to tar and feather the teacher who hit Amy, cares tenderly for Beth, and doesn’t want Meg to grow up and get married. She is excited to share her ideas but not always her innermost feelings; when she does so, she is forceful but apologetic. Once she makes up her mind, she is unwavering, refusing to forgive Amy for burning her manuscript until threatened with nearly losing her sister. Jo isn’t truly happy until she is writing what is in her heart, rather than what the publisher wants.

Extroverted Thinking (Te): Her talent for organizing others is perfected through her in-house theatrical performances in which she plays the role of head writer and director, in making sure that Amy gets a proper education, and in making decisive choices that relate to taking care of her family. Jo gets an idea, decides how she feels about it, and acts on it – cutting her hair so that her mother will have enough money for the journey, turning down Laurie’s offer of marriage, and taking it upon herself to get published in whatever way she can (including allowing editors to think she’s a man, and defending both that and her choice of writing topics). Jo is forceful and articulate when sharing her opinions.

Introverted Sensing (Si): Even though Jo is mostly focused on new ideas, she is also incredibly sentimental about her life at home and unwilling to see that change; she hates it when the sisters are not “all together,” and is fearful that Meg’s marriage will forever alter their happiness. She finds her true balance when she starts writing stories not merely from her imagination, but inspired by the real-life events of her sisters’ lives.

I got a lot of feelings about Meg. Riordan chose to explore further the abuse of parental figures, touching it with Gabe in the Lightning Thief. The emotional manipulation being recognized by Apollo when he realizes how Nero is controlling Meg is really important for kids to realize. It’s just as twisted as physical abuse, apollo didn’t say Meg was a fool for letting him control her. He didnt belittle it. He knew how messed up it was. He recognized that she knew, and yet she couldn’t break from it truly. That’s what kids that face mental and emotional abuse deal with it at that age. There was no “just ignore him dont let him get to you”. She doesn’t immediately listen to apollo, there was no magic to make her suddenly realize with the help of her friends. Just like there’s no magic when real kids recognize their abusers words, she’s still suffering but she made her own choice. And I think Riordan captured perfectly the personified version of Nero/Beast because that’s exactly how I was raised to deal with my abuser. By thinking of them as two seperate beings, not the same person using it as a front. I’m just really glad I have someone from this series I can relate to at an even further depth.