what i should be doing now

The Question (I Know What I Like) by PhemieC

A new original song. For when happiness is hard, but love is easy. <3 download at bandcamp source. :)

~

I stood outside for hours
hands to god for the answers
frozen fingers demanding
can’t pry open for asking

I might never find the answers
but I know who’ll keep me warm

And you’re begging for questions
on your knees for a lesson
work so hard just to do right
by all pretense and portends

come here into my cold hands
nothing to question anymore

And I don’t know the words that will get you through
nothing’s ever made sense to me but you
or how to convince you that you’re doing alright
I may not know love, but I know what I like

there were parts of me missing
one eye on what’s approaching
one hand grasping for something
one hand fighting off nothing

now you have two feet in the past
running circles in your mind

they all say that they like you
but does anyone like you?
you can’t stand when they see you
tear-stained and fearing the untrue

but I like you more than breathing
fuck the demons whispering otherwise

And I don’t know the words that will help you heal
the heart is a strange and stubborn thing
or how to convince you that we’re doing alright
No I may not know that, but I know what I like

I know what I like

(I know what I like)
I stood outside for hours
(I know what I like)
hands to god for the answers
(I know what I like)
I stood outside for hours
(I know what I like)
hands to god, you’re my answer!

~

Trust Your Instincts

I’m not sure if I should call this a theory. It’s something I feel like we as a community have to acknowledge.

In the stream Mark did of the new office a few weeks ago, he said something that I was just reminded of:

“I’ve said this before, but you guys aren’t stupid. Like, you guys know if something’s up. You guys know if something’s off. You guys know if the videos that I’m making aren’t exactly what they should be.”

And I know this whole situation with the “don’t remember” video is all fun and goofs. But… if I were to make a conclusion based off of what we’ve gotten with that, plus the “big mood” video, it would be something along these lines, putting everything we know about Dark and WKM aside for now:

We need to trust our instincts more. We DO know if things aren’t quite what they should be. We’re not blind and we’re not stupid.

A lot of what we see is what Mark wants us to see.

If we miss something, he finds a way to make it clear to us.

If we come to the wrong conclusion, he corrects it.

And we all know that this story he’s telling us is a work in progress– he’s doing it as he goes along, and he might change his mind many times part way through.

So I guess what I’m saying to you is this:

Give yourself more credit for your ideas. If you saw something and other people saw it too, that probably means we’re on the right track. And if that ends up being something totally wrong (i.e. the Damien turning gray situation), that doesn’t mean it was a bad idea to begin with, it just means that we’re watching closer than Mark thought we would.

And if your idea is something nobody has proposed yet, that’s okay, too. Some answers need just one little nudge to set us all on fire (i.e. the anon and the subsequent mirror-multiverse theory).

If I’ve learned one thing in my just over a month on Tumblr, it’s that overthinking is the best thinking. Even if it leads us to incorrect conclusions, other steps along the way might hold the key.

Mark knows we’re watching him close.

Him being all obscure like this is probably his way of buying himself more time to work out this story of his… but for now, we should take comfort in knowing that it will work itself out, and that with time we’ll see exactly what he’s up to.

I’ve mostly gotten over the confusion of it all, actually. I’m mostly excited for the way it’ll all unfold for us.

Oh, and @markiplier?

We’re supporting you here, but… try not to toy with our emotions so much this time, if you could.

best parts of the we got exorcisms video:

  • shane: *looks into the camera, shakes head*
  • “i do not call them names, that’s a lie”
  • cut to: ryan in the sallie house calling the demon a motherfucker
  • “you should be dead, long gone” (shane and ryan laugh)
  • “i’m demon-proof we all know that” “you’re not demon-proof” “i’m demon-proof babyyy”
  • “originally I went into this hoping to learn what the rite of exorcism is… but now I just kinda hope I don’t die.”
  • shane still has his tea when an exorcism is about to be conducted
  • ryan put his hand on shane’s shoulder
  • shane’s eyes rolled into the back of his head the second father carlos put his hand on his head? demon shane confirmed
  • bekki thinks shane might be a demon, demon shane confirmed x2
  • “i wanted him to really peer into my peepers and see what kinda devils i got”
  • “ryan’s was funny because you could see stressed-out ryan tense up the entire time”
  • *intense staring* “amen” (shane and ryan get startled)

antivillain  asked:

So I got a "Rise up while you can" tattoo last winter because I wanted something resistancey and Georgia Mason is my current favorite character. It's had an unintended side benefit, though. I lost my job and it's been really difficult to get out of bed some days. Having a reminder on my ankle that I should rise up while I can has helped me literally rise up because what do you know, turns out I actually can. So thanks to you and Georgia for helping me fight my depression.

Oh.

I am so proud of you right now.

And I want to see your tattoo, because I am a nerd.

4

Decided to make a post for the end of transawarness week to show my progress. The top two photos show me pretransition awkward and kind of uncomfortable. I was incredibly unhappy and hated my body. The bottom two are of me now a couple years into hormones and making progress everyday. I just wanted to say that no matter how old you are or what you think of yourself you deserve to be happy and respected regardless of your identity or your background. We are all worthy of love and respect and we should all feel safe and comfortable to be who we are 💙❤💙(fetish blogs and anti-lgbt+ communities do not interact)

anonymous asked:

Hey Dean can i get some words of strength? things aren't going very well right now...

Well, if now is a hard time for you, you should know this will be one of many. But for every tear you shed, every goodbye you say, and every broken heart you endure… there will be a laugh, a new hello, and a happy flutter in your chest. We all get down sometimes. We all make mistakes, we all fail. We’re human. It’s what we do. Sure, we might want to save and help everyone… hell, most of us try… but sometimes we can’t, and we need to accept that. Accept our imperfections, and allow our mistakes to be fixed and forgotten. 

You can’t start towards a happy future if you dwell in the past. 

Every second you live, and thrive… is another second of a wonderful life. Wether it seems like it or not. You are wonderful, and intelligent, and brave, and beautiful on the inside and out. Don’t let anyone else tell you different or I will beat their ass. 

We don’t need to be strong forever. There are times to be weak, and let your walls down. It’s okay to need help. It’s okay to ask someone to pick you back up and set you on your feet. It’s okay to feel helpless, and to be afraid to get back up again once you have fallen. It’s okay to mess up and to feel bad. You’re only human.

And sure, loving yourself isn’t the easiest thing to do at all times, but you need to remember that you matter. If you don’t matter to yourself, then you matter to those around you. Even if it doesn’t seem like it. If you don’t believe that, then count on the fact that you matter to me, because you do. So fucking much. 

I love you. For every mistake you make, for every good thing you do, for every tear you shed, and every day you live. I love you for pushing through and coming to me in a time of need. I love you for being so strong even if you feel like you’re weak.  

We all need a boost sometimes. We all need to be told we are loved, and we all need to know that there will always be someone right there for them. If that someone is not available, come to me. -because I will always be here. I will always care, and I will always try to understand.

I will always believe you matter and love you for who you are because I know, that no one deserves the mental battles they fight. If someone thinks of you differently for the battles you are fighting, then screw them. You do not need to be treated like a cancer patient. You do not deserve to be treated differently than anyone else. You deserve to be treated, and helped… like any other person here.

I know what it is like to be treated like fine china. I know what it is like to feel like I cannot breathe because I am talking to the wrong person about my problems… I know. I know the pain. I know the struggle. Hell, I live it.

But don’t you for one second think that you don’t matter. Don’t you dare.

Because you matter to me.

Because I care.

-and I will always be there for you. 

Just talk to me.

I love you.

anonymous asked:

helllooo :-) i need your help bb! okay so there’s that huge special 60% off on the ep’s and idk if i should get get together (i’ve been wanting it for a while now) or wait for christmas to get pets! what do you think? thank u!

tbh pets is amazing and brindleton bay is the new windenburg so wait 4 pets tbh! unless u can get both lmao

Pidge, internally: Okay, all you gotta do is just say hi. No sweat!

Keith: Hey.

Pidge: Hey there! Isn’t today’s weather just dandy? I bet the stars out there are beautiful tonight!

Keith: Pidge, we’re stuck in a cargo box off to some unknown Galran dock and you can see the stars?

Pidge:

Pidge: Hi.

_______________

I’ll get back to the music thing now.

The air feels cold around them as Kuro walks his way back home, Mahiru being carried on his back. Unconscious, with his arms covered in bruises as a result of putting himself over the line.. Mahiru could be far too reckless at times yet Kuro care for him as much. He should be use to it by now, knowing Mahiru’s true nature of always help whoever was in need, but that didn’t stop him from getting worried about his well being.

‘What am I gonna do with you?’, he thinks as he tightens his hold on Mahiru’s legs. He’s still unconscious, Kuro can tell by the way he breaths. His heart beating in slow motion against his back as the winter night embrace his slim body. It’s far too quiet and Kuro hates it ‘cause for once, all he wants to do is hear Mahiru’s voice reassuring him that everything’s okay. That’s he’s alright.

‘Please, wake up’, he pleads, time coming to an stop ‘Wake up, Mahiru’

His heart feels heavy, guilt running all the way through his veins as his feet keep walking that never ending route. It’s like he’s not getting anywhere despite moving all the way down the streets. He’s stuck, the memory of their last fight still fresh on his mind, his hands covered in Mahiru’s blood. What would’ve happened if he didn’t took the last blow? Would Mahiru..?

‘No, don’t think about it’, he mutters under his breath, shaking his head ‘He’s still here. He’s still with me

Yet Mahiru doesn’t show any sign of waking up soon and that makes his heart ache. ‘Damn it, Mahiru. Open your eyes’

‘Ku.. ro’, he hears a soft whimper and he could swear he forgot how to breathe. After what felt like centuries for Kuro, his eve was awake and he can’t help but sigh in relief, the feeling aching in his chest disappearing just slightly. He wants to scold him like Mahiru usually does when he goes further than he should, yet he finds himself being gentle towards his careless eve ‘cause damn, he could never get mad at him.

Taking a deep breath, he lets the words spill out of his mouth softer than he intended to ‘It doesn’t have to be you all the time, you know?’

‘Sorry, I just thought..’ Mahiru apologize, his hands tightening his hold on Kuro’s shoulders.

‘You could’ve died back there’ Kuro says, biting his lower lip.

‘I know..’

‘I’m the one who has to protect you. If I can’t do that much, what kind of partner am I?’ he could taste the guilt stuck in his throat as he speaks.

‘Kuro..’

‘Just.. don’t die in front of me. I can’t afford to lose you’

Mahiru remains silent as few tears run down his cheeks, arms wrapping around Kuro’s neck whilst he rests his head on his shoulder “You don’t have to worry. I won’t ever leave your side. Ever’

‘Ever, you say’ Kuro sighs, the words easing his worry a little ‘You better keep your word, silly Mahiru’

Mahiru laughs and Kuro finds it the sweetest sound he have ever heard in his entire life ‘I promise, I will’. There are soft lips pressed against his cheek and Kuro can’t help but smile along side his eve. He knows things might get troublesome in the future but having Mahiru with him, breathing and alive, assures him that it’ll be alright. As long as they stay together, they’ll be alright.

anonymous asked:

Okay i need,,,some danti now,,,i love drunk anti holy heckle

(( this was super fun ))

Dark had not been expecting to be used as a climbing frame that night, but he also hadn’t been expecting Anti to appear. Now, the glitch was hanging off his arms, legs around Dark’s waist, constantly saying Dark’s name or any combination of his name such as “Darkiboo.”

Tonight was going to be a headache.

“What should we do with him?” Wil asked, poking at Anti who hissed at him and glitched around Dark’s body.

“Get him off me.” Dark suggested, “Fine me a laser pen.”

Shrugging, Wilford left as Dark grabbed Anti by the scruff of his neck and dragged him off his back. Anti dangled from his grip, kicking weakly to get himself re-wrapped around Dark. Reaching out, Dark tapped Anti on the nose and the glitch went still, tongue peeking from his lips. It took all of Dark’s control not to laugh at the sight of Anti ‘blepping’ in front of him.

“Darkiboo.” Anti eventually whined, kicking again but Dark ignored him. Falling silent, Anti merely stared, chewing on his lip until Wilford burst back in, carrying a laser pen.

Give it to me.” Dark ordered.

As soon as the light appeared on the wall, Anti’s eyes went wide and when Dark dropped him to the floor, he crouched and followed the light with his gaze. Chuckling as Anti’s butt wiggled in the same way a cat’s would, Dark quickly moved the light to another wall and Anti chased it, smacking into the wall loudly. Whining, Anti followed the light despite being super dizzy because of the wall.

For hours they placed like this, with Anti constantly after the laser pen until he couldn’t breathe anymore and he collapsed.

“Mm.”

Dark hummed as he moved over to Anti and picked him up, taking him to their bedroom and tucking him under the duvet. The glitch was mumbling again, but he fell asleep quickly.

He was going to have a hangover in the morning.

the world is yours, starting from now

“I need you to understand. I’m not offering you this opportunity out of pity. I’m offering this out of genuine respect.”

“And because you think I can change the world, somehow.”

“In a way. In your hands, One For All would not only do what it was meant to do, but you would have a greater potential for changing things for the better, should you decide to.”

“…And what if I say no?”

“Then that will be your choice.”

Read it on A03: link

Part 3 in the Take Me As I Am series.

0-0-0-0-0-0

Chapter 2

“Aizawa-sensei, you’re back!”

“Whoa, should you really be out of the infirmary?”

“It’s nothing,” Aizawa says, but even by Katsuki’s standards, the amount of bandages wrapped around him isn’t nothing. And he says this from the perspective of someone who’s got nerve damage in his hands from the amount of firepower he used, as well as the scars to show for it. The bastard’s face is almost completely obscured, save small slits for his eyes, nose and mouth. His arms are also wrapped and held up with slings.

An image comes back to him - the bastard, defiant to the last, jerking his head up, eyes blazing red as he’d desperately tried to save Tsuyu from Shigaraki’s Quirk. He’d had blood streaming down his face and bones broken, but he’d still fought the Noumu’s grip until the creature had smashed his face into the concrete. 

And if rumors are to be believed, the bastard had been pushing himself in those final moments, and as a cost his Quirk is unstable. Whether that means he has to blink more, or his Erasure isn’t as strong, Katsuki doesn’t know. He isn’t about to ask either, because he knows the bastard won’t tell him. 

Keep reading

You know why I honestly don’t give not even an eighth of a fuck what people think of me?

Because there is literally

Nothing

You can do to change anyone’s opinion of you if they don’t want it to be changed. People only believe what they WANT to believe. So I just let everyone think whatever the fuck they want.

Why?

BECAUSE THE ONLY OPINION OF YOU THAT REALLY MATTERS IS YOUR OWN.

Anyone else’s opinion of you is

Worthless

and should be treated as such.

[====[==========>

Let that sink in for a fuckin moment.

Now read the first half of this post again in a screaming voice inside your head.

Say it aloud if you have to so that you

Remember it and live your life according to it.

You WILL be a happier person if you do.

I am living proof of it.

love is all you need. // the whitest lie.

i don’t write theories a lot. hell, i read them but i don’t usually share mine. so just now i went through the sp7 search feed and, you know what, i need input.

so, obviously the line ‘must be nice’ is a parallel. there’s a bunch o’ gifs about it. hell, i made one set too.

but the video as a whole, now what if the two videos make a full circle?

“If I knew what love is… I’d die.” pretty standard cib-speak isn’t it?

“You should do it. I deserve it.” says Cib, while having his arm protectively around Sami Jo. 

This might just pass off as coincidence and I might just be reading into things too much but, we don’t really know what happens in the sp7 writing process. I’m a little bit scared for what’s coming next, tbh.

Stage 6 =/= Evil

All the progression I’ve seen is where Percy turns against Olympus.

But he won’t do that, it’s against what he thinks. That’s what Stage 6 is about - following your gut verses following what you’re told. Percy chose to help Meg and Apollo because of Meg, how she needed help and he’d probably worry himself to death if he let her go out on her own again.

He straight up told Zeus that the “no interacting with demigods” rule was stupid and that it needed to change.

He straight up fingerguned his way out of a rock-paper-scissors competition even though technically speaking it’s against the rules.

He talked down gods, pointed out their mistakes and ‘rules’, and established his morals. He’s Stage 5, heading to Stage 6 rapidly.

anonymous asked:

hi so i am 21 yrs old and after reading things like some of your posts and other articles and things I've started to think that I may be autistic but like I don't know what I should do I'm worried I'm being a hypochondriac and just like. self diagnosing myself with something I don't have, tho I think I experience a lot of the symptoms/traits? and like. how do I go about being diagnosed? should i go about being diagnosed? will it matter? I would like your advice because I really respect you

thank you so much for respecting me, and tho this has happened several times now, i’m still astounded whenever somebody asks me about this sorta thing

first of all, don’t worry that you’re getting it wrong or overthinking things. self-diagnosis is a valid part of being neurodivergent. and also every professional diagnosis STARTS with somebody beforehand being like “i think i might…”

not that every autistic person needs a professional diagnosis to count, of course

anyways, if you feel you relate to the autistic experience, then your wonderings about this are perfectly justified. and in my eyes, you feel you’re autistic? you probably are. and if it turns out you’re not, there’s no bother, okay?

so don’t worry about that

if you want to go professionally diagnosed, go do it. tho if you’re american, i warn you, this is gonna make your life harder. heck even in australia, being autistic comes with certain restrictions. in america it’s worse. especially since doctors cost money over there. so if thats the case, it’s not worth it

i’m australian and i got professionally diagnosed when i was 17. and like, we already knew. i’d read up on autism for years before and i knew it applied to me. soon as i read the wikipedia pages on asperger’s syndrome and autism i was like “uhm holy shit? this is me.” and i delved into the community right away

based on MY experience (so i dunno if this works for everybody) if you wanna be prof diagnosed, you mention it to your GP. you say “i think i’m autistic” (it’s important to say think because doctors like to maintain superiority over patients at all times) and they’ll ask why and you give a few of your reasons why you suspect this. hopefully you’ll be referred to a specialist and you go to them

the people for that are neurologists and psychologists. you go to some appointment with them, they ask you questions for a few hours (and, this is important, you must have a parent or guardian with you when this happens)

and they’re generally friendly and nonpressuring

and eventually you’ll get a phone call or a letter about the results

again, this is what happened to me, it may be different now. and different in other countries. and my tests included brain scans for my own specific reasons

so experiences may vary

so basically if you wanna be prof diagnosed, and it’s safe/practical for you to be, you can look into that. just discuss things with your doctor. also i’d never respond to somebody going “i think i’m autistic” with “yeah just ignore that”

again, being just self-diagnosed is perfectly fine. i promise it’s doing no harm to the autistic community. and prof diagnosis is a privilege not everybody can have, so i’d never be like “NO, you have to be CONFIRMED to be autistic!”

because that way of thinking is bullshit

so, in short

  • do what you want, it’s your brain, your life
  • the more the merrier, we’re happy to have you
  • read up more on the subject and community
  • and good luck

i dreamt that touka went up to ayato and said “i know this is hard for you but thank you so much for supporting me.” and ayato is like “i don’t know what’s going on right now. everything has changed so much and i’m so confused. but aneki is here and will always be here and all i can do right now is be by your side and help you out even if it’s against what i believe in, to make up for all those time i should have been by your side.”

touka gets confused and she’s like ???? and ayato kinda chuckles and looks sheepish and he’s rubbing his neck and going, “i guess this is a kind of redemption? haha..”

touka does an eye twitch and ayato gets a little scared because he thinks she’s gonna slap him and he’s desperately trying to come up with some kind of excuse or something. but he can’t think of anything and she’s like fuming when reaching out to him and he winces but instead of a slap she pulls him into a hug.

“little kids don’t need redemption. you can’t keep holding on to so much regret. you’re so young.” and touka’s words kinda makes him almost tear up because he’s like, no i don’t deserve this, i’m shit, i don’t deserve aneki at all and of course touka just knows this is what he’s thinking of right now so she just hugs him tight and rubs his back. ayato highkey wants to cry but he’s holding it all in because uhh, image and the fact they’re in the ccg.

eventually they pull away and ayato asks her why she’s able to look past every thing when he’s hurt her so much. he can’t even forgive himself so how can touka? and touka’s brimming a huge smile like, “huh? it’s because we’re family.” in that like duh kind of tone.

ayato smiles weakly while mumbling, “family…” and looking at touka’s tummy, thinking about the baby and how their family is gonna get bigger soon.

touka’s like “now, let’s to get back the rest of our family, okay?” and ayato stays silent for a moment before he looks up at her and goes, “okay!” in that sunshine smile his younger self always gave her and she used to think about a lot.

and that is the whole of chapter 151 in my dream and i cried so hard

anonymous asked:

I went with this dude for four days. He was such a cool guy, so nice. Yesterday he went kind too far even if I had told him repeatedly to not do so. He said four times "My god if I want to rape you" but I didn't give in, and ended up home safely. This morning he sent me a message saying that "we were not compatible, that he couldn't make me suffer like this". Why do I even suffer for someone I met 4 days ago and who claimed to want to rape me?

WHAT

MONSTER.

PLEASE REPORT HIM TO AUTHORITIES.

some girl may not be strong enough to reject him.

terrible things could happen.

report that ass*ole

he wen’t to far, well! now he’ll see the far.

No mercy on people like this.

and i don’t think you should even suffer for some stupid kid like him.

my god this world. please, you deserve so much more!

anonymous asked:

Hey, Donnie, I need some advice. I've been looking for a job for the last two months and I've hit rock bottom. I don't know what to do. I don't think anyone is looking for someone to hire right now. I'm staying at my grandparents house for while, but nothing's come for me so far. What can I do? Should I just wait for someone to call for a job opening or should I just keep looking?

Have you tried your own job?

Maybe you can babysit? Walk dogs? Drive an uber? Offer to do errands for people? Mow people’s yards? House sit? There are small opportunities that you can do. 

in what ways do you all treat yourselves without a lot of $? or if you spend money, what would it be on? i’m considering getting my nails done or getting eyelash extensions done again. bc of uni, i wasn’t able to work heaps and therefore couldn’t afford the maintenance of both. but idk if i should do that or, say, buy my favourite perfume or splurge on a facial serum (ahem, vintner’s daughter) or like… buy a nice gold chain. or weekend away! i mean, i worked hard all year and now i’m starting to feel down (life is hitting me, you know?), so i deserve it, right?