what else was i going to do

(I’m the DM and I sent the players to a small town to look for someone. They realized the herbalist was involved with something.)

Me (The Herbalist): What would you like? I’ve got mushrooms, herbs, and flowers, as the name entails.
Wizard: Do you have any herbs?
Me (OOC): I’m the fucking herbalist.
Wizard: I’m looking for a specific one… It’s got, like, 5 leaves.
Wizard (OOC): I’m so sorry.
Me (OOC): He looks at her conspiratorially and nods, and looks under his counter.
(All of the other players realizing what’s going on.)
Me (OOC): He takes out a jar of weed.
Me (The Herbalist): This’ll be two gold.
Wizard (OOC): *softly* A whole fucking jar. I hand two gold over.
Me (The Herbalist): Was there anything else?
Cleric (OOC): [The Cleric] looks at [The Herbalist] and slides two gold coins to him too.

(The barbarian later throws someone through the front door of the herbalist’s and the wizard casts fog cloud before breaking into the herbalist’s basement.)

anonymous asked:

Tree bros body swap au?

(Ive seen one of these already and I’ve been dying to have a take at it)

  • They are both in the nurses office, Evan just having his head flushed down a toilet and Connor being just beaten up. They don’t talk to each other at first but make a lot of eye contact, wondering what happen to the other boy.
  • When Connor does say something, he asks why the hell is he in here? He doesn’t seem beaten up.. Was he faking a head injury or something?
  • Evan doesn’t respond, but nods because he kind of just wanted to go home.
  • Connor wishes he could go home too, but he knows a black eye and a bloody nose isn’t even enough for anyone in his family to even notice him.
  • Evan wishes he was tough like Connor, he wished he wasn’t such a baby and had to fake injury to get out of school.
  • A silent agreement happens that they wish they had each others lives, Then they switch
  • Connor just feels really short, his head hurts a bit but he feels great.. Evan however…
  • Evan feels like he going to throw up, he’s never felt this much pain in his life, his face stings his hands sting. He feels like he’s deep thrown in a garbage disposal.

“Connor what the heck!”


“I dont know!? I guess we switched or something.. Come to think of it this isn’t half bad..”


“Connor!”


“what? My life sucks! Personally i won’t mind staying like this..”

  • Connor and Evan have to meet up after school to get to know everything about each other.
  • Evan tells him about his mom, how she’s the best person in the whole world and if Connor throws a printer at her he won’t hesitate to shave Connors head
  • Connor agrees because he loves his floof
  • Connor is totally fine with Evan in his body, But he makes one rule clear..
  • “Dont talk to Zoe… Don’t even look at her Hansen.. You hear me?”
  • (He knows about the note)
  • P R O T E C T I V E C O N N E R
  • They get sent on their own ways, Connor heading home with Mrs Hansen, and Evan attending a few more classes before having a panic attack in the bathroom because ‘Jesus christ Connor murphy is a horrible person what is his life at home going to be like’
  • Evan starts to look around the parking lot for something that says “Im edgy! Connor Murphy’s car!” Or something like that..
  • Z O E A L  E R T
  • She goes up to Evan and there is never a more awkward conversation
  • “Connor! Where the hell are you going?”

“Home…..”

“Im giving you a ride you idiot.. Or are you too high to remember that mom and dad took your car?”

“Uh… Right.. Um.. thanks the.”

“How high are you?”

“High…like.. drugs high? Oh shoot i do drugs right”

  • Zoe thinks “Connor” is just reeeally high so she tries not to talk to him on the car ride home.
  • She almost crashes when Evan tries to starts up a friendly conversation about her day.
  • Evan listens to Connor and immediately goes to his room, only to be disgusted when he realizes theres gotta be a dead thing in here because Damn it reeks
  • Evan cants take it any longer and he goes downstairs to request frebreze from Cynthia to spray around the room.
  • FAMILY DINNER TIME
  • Evan is so shook he has no idea what the hell he’s supposed to say/do because he’s never eaten dinner at a table with a group of people before.
  • He actually ends up talking at the table because someone asked him how his day went, he talks about His day (Evan) and Cynthia is just so surprised that he answered.
  • Zoe is so confused “What the hell is wrong with my brother..”
  • Of course Larry thinks he’s high and sends him away to him room.
  • Evan has a fit in the room and ends up falling asleep and missing a planned call from Connor to talk about the next day.
  • Connor on the other hand…
  • Connor waits for Evans mom but starts to get seriously hungry, he makes pasta and waits for Evans mom still… She never shows up..
  • Connor gives up waiting and goes outside to smoke, Then stops..
  • He can’t hurt Evans body like that.. Evan wouldn’t want it.. So he doesn’t smoke.
  • Connor calls Evan like 8 times and Zoe ends up finally picking up the phone.
  • “Evan? Why are you calling my brother?”

“Zoe! shi-.. Give Connor the phone i need to talk to him..”

“Um.. He’s asleep.. Why are you calling him?”

“I um.. We um.. I just need to..”

  • Reaaaal smooth Connor
  • The next day, Evan and Connor meet up before school to trade schedules and go to each others classes, its doesn’t go well..
  • Evan ends up getting lost (How? idk) And just panics in the bathroom once more.
  • Connor just skips like.. all of the classes, Only to find Jared skipping as well..
  • A BO RT A B OR T  JA RE D IS APP ROA C HIN G
  • Jared is just a concerned boi for his family friend.. Evan never misses classes unless he’s having a panic attack.. But if he is he’s usually not walking around the school…
  • He goes up to Connor (as Evan) and asks if he’s okay.
  • “EVAN” CURSES HIM OUT AND HE ALMOST THROWS UP IN THE HALLWAY BECAUSE WHO KNEW LITTLE EVAN COULD SAY SUCH THINGS.
  • Evan finds Connor and Jared and asks whats wrong, Connor says what happened. 
  • Evan starts to cry because his only friend will never want to talk to him again.
  • Connor starts to freak out and tell Evan to “Shut the hell up” But Jared is watching at this point.
  • CONFUSED B O I
  • Jared doesn’t believe them at first after they tell him but then he gives in as Connor (Evan) Starts talking about how they met in preschool and there is no way he told that to Connor Murphy
  • Jared starts to research how to fix it while Evan and Connor go over some ground rules for each other
  • CONNOR’S RULES:
  1. “Don't talk to anyone in the family, and if you absolutely have, talk in one word sentences and responses.”
  2. “Don't you dare ever come to school wearing a dorky blue color without having the hoodie over it.”
  3. “Just… Avoid Zoe…”
  4. “If Larry asks if your high say yes because its an easy excuse.”

EVAN’S RULES:

  1. “Be careful around my mom… shell know something is up..”
  2. “If she asks you about refills.. say you’re fine.. um, they’re for my anxiety.. Im not sure if you need them but-”
  3. “Dont shower”

“What?”

“I don’t want you to.. um, yknow..”

“Jesus christ Evan I won’t look..”

“Just don’t do it ok-”

    4.” I have therapy this weekend.. So.. Don’t like, be super open to questions and stuff.. he’ll know something is w-wrong..”

   5. “P-please don’t smoke.. i just.. i don’t-”

  • And off they go, Evan riding home with Zoe once more and Connor walking to Evans house. praying that they’ll switch back..
  • Jared ends up telling Alana what happened, she just rolls with it because who knows maybe Jared is right?
  • Connor has almost fallen asleep when Evan comes bursting into his room.
  • He doesn’t have his hoodie on…. so he can see the scars…
  • Connor spends the next hour or so trying to explain why he did it and confirming over and over that he won’t do it again anytime soon.
  • Evan just ends up staying the night there as they have a-lot to talk about..
  •  Connor explains to Evan why he’s so mad and angry all the time.. And he wouldn’t be surprised if Evan started to act like the because he’s hanging out with his family..
  • Evan explains why he broke his arm.. Connor then immediately feels bad for pushing him over..
  • As the night goes on… They come closer and closer.. revealing things to each other that they never shared with anyone..
  • Connor kisses Evan and Evan is just straight up shocked
  • “Wha-”

“Don’t think of it as a personal thing.. I just.. is it weird that I’ve always wanted to make out with myself?”

“Y-ye-s? No? i dont kn-…”

  • They hang out a lot more after that.. Not because of the kiss.. no.. right?
  • Zoe thinks they’re dating, and starts to question Evan (as Connor) about it.
  • “Have you kissed yet?”

“Wha- I um…”

“Omg you have! I never thought id see the day.. You have seemed different now that you started to date him..”

“We’re not dating..!”

  • Cynthia starts to like her new acting son.. He’s a little anxious but something about that Evan boy is definitely changing him.
  • Larry is super suspicious, but Zoe protects her brother and says he hasn’t done drugs in like.. months.
  • LA RRY GETS CONNOR TO PLAY BASEBALL WITH HIM SO HES HAPPY
  • Connor loves mrs Hansen… Enough said.
  • They have movie nights, late night eating junk food, He takes her out on a walk one day.. Its just So pure
  • One time, Connor and Evan are hanging out in Evans house and Mrs Hansen shows up to ask if they want something to eat And Evan starts to C RY
  • HE MISSES HIS MOM SO MUCH AH
  • Zoe shows up to pick up Evan…  and Connor realizes he Misses her
  • They both just… miss their lives so much… Its been a month.. Like,, bring the bois home.
  • JARED BURSTS IN AND HE H A S A C U R E
  • They switch back, both sobbing with happiness as Jared stands in the back kinda awkwardly..
  • Of course they thank Jared what kind of monster do you think i am
  • Finally, they go back to their homes, Connor literally hugs Zoe which is new.. But she rolls with it.
  • Evan is just sobbing in his mothers arm saying how much he missed her
  • They both agree that they should date because they know each other better then anyone else.
  •  SO MA NY INSI DE J OK ES
  • Evan is just so comfortable around the Murphy’s, same thing with Connor and Mrs Hansen.
  • A pure duo

(Add on if you like!)

The First Time With Jeon Jungkook

Originally posted by syeons

Genre: romance/fluff
Pairing: Jungkook/You
Length: 12203 words
Summary: This a series based on all of your first times with Jungkook from your childhood till when you both reach adult hood.

PART 1 PART 2 PART 3 PART 4 PART 5 /PART 6


THE FIRST TIME YOU KISSED

“You tell me Y/N, do you want this?” he brushes his thumb over your cheek “Do you want to kiss me?”

Before you could ever give your response to him, reality hits the shameless boy like a train. What was he thinking when he asked you such a question? His sudden tendency to take your feelings for granted by working his moves on you, wasn’t how he ever wanted it to be. He was curious and quite greedy about having the chance to win your first kiss. Was it still like a competition for him? Was he toying with you or was he being serious?

Jungkook was your best friend and his intentions were never ill to begin with. You knew from day one, when he held your hand and decided to be your friend back then in kindergarten, that he was anything but harmful. You were well aware of the fact that he could be trusted, and all these years of friendship proved that he was a keeper. Maybe you could trust him? But what would it change? Only jungkook had the answers and decisions to take in this very moment, yet he suddenly stepped away from you

What am I doing, right now? Jungkook would suddenly ask himself as he eyed your lips up-close for the first time in his life

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What if both Lena and Kara think their already dating but nobody else knows because they're both like "well they haven't mentioned going public and I don't want to push" and they're just both thinking that their girlfriend is shy about kissing so they never do more than hold hands.

*grabby hands*

Okay but also

What if everyone thinks they’re dating except Kara and Lena? People keep giving them supportive comments and saying things like how proud they are and they’re just ?????

People ask them if they wanna enter a charity raffle and they win a couples massage and of course they go together.

They have tooth brushes and drawers at each others places. If you can’t find them at one apartment, they’re probably at the other and everyone knows this.

When they finally get together, they tell everyone but everyone thinks they’re announcing their engagement.

AO3 vs ff.net

Okay, so I have issues with how each on sets out there stuff. Like, I don’t like how fanfiction.net doesn’t really allow for spacing? So sometimes what comes out as longer chapters on ff.net are actually two shorter chapters on AO3. I dislike the larger font on AO3 and that you can’t read it as a ½ sized layout like ff.net, but then I dislike ff.net’s inability to justify text or as said above, the lack of line spaces that can be slapped in.

2

For anon…reader is dating Tony as requested. Enjoy! Mentions of abusive previous relationship

Y/N slammed the door behind her as she entered Pepper’s office. The red head glanced up with a confused expression. Knitting her brows, she glanced down at her notes before looking back up.

“Y/N?” she asked, “I didn’t think I was supposed to see you until Thursday.”
She smiled. “I’m sorry Pepper. It’s just…I couldn’t go home quite yet.”
“Why’s that?”

Pepper arched a brow as she saw Y/N’s face pale. The woman quickly covered it with a shake of the head.

“The apartment above mine flooded. They’re working on my ceiling. Would it be alright if I milled about here?”

Pepper studied Y/N for a moment. Something was off, but she wasn’t sure what. A moment later, Pepper nodded in agreement.

“Of course. I’ve got an hour: we could have our meeting now.”

Y/N smiled appreciatively at Pepper.

Keep reading

friendlyneighborhoodwhatever  asked:

Hi, hello! So I'm finally starting to write a novel and I was wondering if you have any tips on how to begin it? I already have it planned out but I can't find a way to actually start it

Hi there! I’m not the best person to ask this because I have trouble with it myself. What I usually do is write another part of the story a scene that I have planned out or something or I put some music on and just sit with a blank screen or pad, I find the music just helps me start off a story sometimes.


If any one else has any ideas go ahead and share them with us! ^_^

-Faye

3

noel: i just… like… where do you see this going?
isaac: with you lying on me like that, i see it going a couple of ways.
noel: stop, that’s not what i mean. you know, like, me and you? we’ve been doing… whatever this is for a long time now and i’m just… i’m wondering where we’re going.
isaac: noel, don’t be so… listen. we don’t need to talk about all of that right now, huh?
noel: …don’t be so what? my kids are starting to wonder who you are to them, i’m starting to wonder who you are to me… we’re too old be playing the ‘what are we’ game, isaac… so yes, we do need to talk about all of that right now. or else we never will.

anonymous asked:

Makoto, did you hear all the nice things the girls said about you? And Togami said nothing. Maybe you should get with someone more loving than he is. I don't know if he's treating you right.

I don’t know what they said but just because Byakuya didn’t openly express his feelings doesn’t mean that he doesn’t treat me right. We all have things we are comfortable with doing or not. Byakuya is a very good boyfriend and I do not need you to tell me that I should go out with someone else.


Allow me to interfere but Togami-kun said that he loved you, Makoto. He said it clearly to an open audience, that’s already a lot for someone like him.


I admit that I was a bit surprised as I was ready to tease him for not being able to say it.


He did…? *blushes before looking around*


He is talking to Jin-san in the kitchen.


Hah…Sorry Sayaka-chan…I will see you later, promise.*quickly walks away*

anonymous asked:

I think LadyLondonderry is the most underrated fic writer out there. Her fics are so special and like no one else's. They each have their own magic to them. I like her longer fics, but she is the Queen of Short Fics. What she can make you feel in just a few thousand words is just extraordinary. Gosh, okay, I'm going to try and pick just one to rec. I'm going to go with Our Garden Grows.

THEY REALLY DO!!!  isn’t she incredible?  and that one is one of my favorites of hers as well.  she’s a gift.

our garden grows by @londonfoginacup

i may have finally convinced my dad to take me to the nuclear power plant sometime soon so i can go into the place where you learn about it and see if i can’t find anyone to ask questions to, but….im NERVOUS as all get out when faced with the actual possibility of getting to go ask about potential future jobs. i mean its an excited nervous, but it is absolutely a stomach-fluttering all-encompassing almost-shaking nervousness.

things that need to stop in 2017

-harassing people over: games, books, shows, etc. that they like. 

-bullying people over bad OCs, they’re characters that literally have a 0% chance of effecting your life

-this elitist animator bullshit going on in the animation community; ‘animations memes are NOT animation so you’re not an aritst!!!!’, ‘MEP/MAPS/PMVs dont require as much effort so ://////” or the classic ‘so i’m better than everyone because i don’t do animation memes!!! uwu’ it’s just some random youtube videos get your head out of your ass and stop sweating over people and their cat animations

-youtube police; stop going onto videos and telling people to do this and that

-treating headcanons as if they were facts. stop forcing yours onto people and stop getting salty over someone else’s because guess what, it’s not canon so it doesn’t effect shit

-hating people because they like a character you don’t like.

-overall being a complete twat for petty things.

You are more than entitled to have opinions. Everyone has them. You do, I do, your grandma’s neighbor, everyone. But it just really makes me sad to know that there’s so much substance in life, so many things you could do that make you happy, and so many people choose to spend it on the internet, specifically making videos/blogs/etc. to tease other people for doing shit that’s completely harmless and makes them happy.

TL;DR: Too many people waste hours of their lives making fun of people for doing things that they love and it’s sad.

French Perfume Part 2

Crowley X Reader

Word Count: 1.1K

Summary: Female reader receives a package from an admirer.

Warnings: language

Catch up: Part 1

Team Free Will POV

“What the hell is she thinking?” Dean yelled. No one else in the whole bar had noticed that two people had just poofed off the dance floor.
Sam pulled out his phone and read (Y/N)’s text message. “I don’t like it either but it looks like she’s made up her mind.”
Dean is frantically trying to call (Y/N) but the phone is going to only to voicemail.
“Guys, I have to tell you something. We should leave.” Cas ordered.

Keep reading

This is from jasminevilll Instagram story at the Vegan Food and Beer fest in LA today 5/27/17

I knew this was going to happen, so Calum and Nia are walking next to each other. Just waking, nothing else. And then I see a bunch of people saying that they are dating. They aren’t dating, they are friends and they are hanging out, and that’s what friends do. If waking next to someone or being at the same place as someone means that you are dating then I guess Calum is dating many girls. Like they are really just friends and nothing else. Some stans or some people are gonna make this complicated and take it to another level Istg.

Calum.And.Nia.Are.Friends.

shiparmada  asked:

Sam Wilson in Check Engine: if he could retire and do any other job, what would he do?

FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK. Here’s a snippet from chapter 3.

“Come on, you could just get a job with Steve here on the force.”

“Local police? Here? Absolutely not.”

Bucky slides his hands around Sam’s middle. “Hmm what else then? Well you could-”

“There’s this bird sanctuary I went to once in California.” All of a sudden the idea places itself in Sam’s head. He doesn’t even realize how badly he wants it until the words are already leaving his mouth. “I- I really like birds. They’re just so free, never really stuck anywhere besides their climate area, you know?. At this sanctuary they have specialists who work with the birds. I’m sure I’d need to go back to college, but I want to do that.” He keeps his thoughts short and sweet because even if they’re just daydreaming out loud, it still seems like he’s giving away too much.

nintendio  asked:

maybe not a question i should ask, but what did you stick to, to lose all that weight? please keep on loving + caring for yourself xoxo

To be 100% honest with you…the easiest way for me is to stick to a diet and go to the gym 5 days per week (at least). I’m not very good with fasting because I end up binging. The best thing to me is prepare my food ahead of time and set times to eat and then I don’t crave anything else. I don’t binge either because I’m still eating regularly. I usually go to the gym every day or at least 5 days per week and do cardio with mixed weights (I use very light weights) - This is just what works for me personally. I don’t want to say exactly what I eat or what I do when I go to the gym because it could be triggering. I hope this helps!! 💕💕

PIRATES 5 REVIEW P.1 | SPOILERS

Disclaimer: Before anyone goes accusing me of hating on this movie or franchise, I will tell you right now that there is nothing else in this world to me, today, that means more than Pirates of the Caribbean. This is the universe I spend all of my time daydreaming in, and if I could go absolutely anywhere in the world, it would be here. This is very strong critiquing, and while I may sound rude or salty, I will not be accused of hating on anything. Do not misinterpret my words. Ye be warned.

Now. Like most of you I had extremely high expectations for the fifth instalment. Overtime, after listening to what the directors and Johnny have said, they fell. Did this movie fulfill my expectations? Yes. But that was only because I was expecting the bare minimum, which is not something I should have to do when it comes to “one of the most powerful franchises in the world.” 

First and foremost, Jack. When we meet him snoring like a freight train in St. Martin, we can somewhat excuse his excessive alcoholic behavior to being at a loss for how to free the Pearl and being stuck on land. However, this excuse falls short when you think of the fact that for ten years after the mutiny he was without her, and in OST he was also without her. Jack is a proactive man, always has been. He needs his own motives to go out and get something done, and dammit if he ain’t selfish to an extent. In OST when Barbossa revealed that the Pearl was sunk without him, Jack lunges at him over a table in front of numerous guards and the King of England himself, eyes wide and dark with rage and passion. He died with that ship, for that ship, //twice//. Why, pray tell, does he (low key) give up on her? He keeps her in that bottle //over his heart//. He bloody //loves// that ship. So why, without her, is he not trying everything to free her, and why did he not look heartbroken when everyone believed her to be sunk to the ocean’s floor?

In that scene, after the wedding, when the Pearl grew and was tossed into the ocean. Why did Barbossa show the most emotion? Perhaps it was the take used, or the writer who clearly knows nothing about Jack. Either way, it bothers me to. no. end. “She was a good ship.” Really, //Captain// Jack Sparrow? That’s all you have to say for the only one thing you love the most in this wretched world?? Shoddy writing. I don’t want to blame Johnny for everything on this one, but he could’ve said something numerous times about Jack’s characterization in this. While I will excuse it because Johnny is family and he was going through a hellish time during filming, it bothers me that he didn’t try to teach good ol’ Jeff Nathanson about our beloved Captain Jack Sparrow.

 Jack was merely tagging along for the movie. The first half of the movie is arguably the best, if you excuse the semi-vaudeville and juvenile jokes. Seeing Jack and his crew try to navigate land was fun, and it indeed did feel like a proper extension of the universe we already love. However, when Henry meets Jack in jail, why is Jack barely even afraid of Salazar? “The dead have taken command of the sea.” Have they? Then why isn’t there a Brethren Court meeting, if Salazar is after every pirate at sea? Why isn’t Jack more worried? In DMC he was bleeding terrified of Davy Jones and did everything he could to get out of that damnation. So why in God’s universe, is Jack asleep drunk on the Dying Gull in the middle of the night? Why does he need 19 year old Henry Turner to chastise him for such behavior?

I am offended by the way they’ve treated Jack in this. I would’ve liked to see him as I know him, as I fell in love with him. Dark, dangerous, intelligent, witty, //protective of the things he loves//. Instead, they only stayed what was on the surface, and what general unknowing audiences see him as. He is not a drunken blabbering pirate. Let him fight Salazar without his damn sword being knocked from his grip, let him have a plan, drive the story along. “Are all pirates this stupid?” No, they’re not! But for some ungodly reason, Nathanson insisted they are. They. Are. Not. They took down the entire EITC themselves! How could anyone call that stupid? 

The best and most telling moment for Jack, I think, besides the end when he finally felt more like himself, was when everyone left him on St. Martin. (Even Gibbs, which is incredibly out of character and bothered me.) Jack looked //lost//. And //that// hurt. Watching him step up onto the quarterdeck with the Pearl, bending down to make it look like she was on the ocean. //That// was Jack. And that’s how I wish he looked when they thought the Pearl was lost. Though I did love the, “what could possibly go wrong?” he asked Gibbs when they finally set sail again. That sliver of a smirk took me back to the Jack I fell in love with, who always had a secret plan up his sleeve.

The flashback, oho boy, the flashback. One of my favorite bits from the movie, except for the fact that apparently nobody at the Disney Studios knew Jack in fact //has// a bloody backstory. “Jack has no character arc, he’s static.” I’m sorry?? There is a 700 some page novel about his bleeding childhood and entrance into true piracy after being branded by Cutler Beckett of the EITC? Excuse me? Do not mistake me for a fool, Disney. Bloody hell. The “tribute” was shite. It very explicitly says in The Price of Freedom by A.C. Crispin, commissioned by Disney in 2011, that Jack got that sash from Actual Zezuran Princess Amenirdis and that compass from Tia Dalma. It bloody says in DMC that he got the compass from Tia Dalma! “The compass you bartered from me, it cannot lead you to this?” Disney, don’t go rewriting what you’ve already said in your own movies for Christ’s sake. And, for your information, Disney, Jack was not captain of the Wicked Wench until he was 25. He was given the Wench by Beckett when he was promoted to captain by the EITC. In fact, Jack was never that high up on a ship until that time, therefore placing him as next in command should the captain fall in your stupid flashback, makes no. bleeding. sense. I did love that they kept Johnny’s voice, and I did love the CGI. Anthony de la Torre did great as the body double, and that port side turn that the Wench made was //beautiful//. Jack was more himself in that scene than any other point of the movie. (Shocker.)

Jack was just pointless in this movie. Honest to God, besides him being of use to Henry and Carina in the beginning, you could’ve taken him out and it wouldn’t have really affected the plot //that// much. And I should not feel that way. I liked that he saved Henry from the sharks, and when he shouted his name, it reminded me of the Jack I know. I like that he pushed Carina out of the way when Henry (possessed by Salazar) came toward him. (He also never once referred to Carina as “love”? He called her “dear” once, but I missed Jack’s cute terms of endearments a lot, and he could’ve used them here.) I liked the bit about Lizzie when he first met Henry. Almost two decades later and he’s still hard for her, be still my Sparrabeth ride or die heart.

He did have his few good moments though. As I mentioned earlier about the placing of the Pearl so it looked like she was at sea. I liked when he cocked his gun at Henry with the, “Next time you raise a weapon, be the last man standing.” I did actually //adore// the banter between him and Carina, and those were some of my most Jack-authentic moments as well. I wished he could’ve acted as more of a mentor to Henry though especially, because they missed a huge opportunity there. When he threatened to keelhaul Henry, he felt like Jack. It was also reminiscent of how he threatened to throw Will overboard on the way to Tortuga in P1.

As happy as I am to have a new pirates movie, as proud as I am of everyone, and as much as I love Dead Men Tell No Tales, it’s not exactly what I might’ve wished for 6 years ago. It didn’t make me love Jack any less, but it made me angry at everyone in charge at Disney. I don’t want Jack to be laughed at. He deserves more than that, and he deserves people to see it. Which is why I’m glad to see others in the Pirates community that feel the same as I do.

Long live the Pirates life, and long live Captain Jack Sparrow.