what else did you expect from crazy me

‘this is how you lose her’ sentence meme, part one

Junot Díaz is a Dominican American writer, creative writing professor at Massachusetts Institute of Technology, and fiction editor at Boston Review.  This sentence meme comes from his short story collection This Is How You Lose Her.  

Considering the collection, there’s a lot of references to infidelity and toxic relationships.  

Feel free to change things around to better suit your characters!!!

This Is How You Lose Her

  • I’m not a bad guy. I know how that sounds—defensive, unscrupulous—but it’s true. I’m like everybody else: weak, full of mistakes, but basically good.
  • You know how it is. A smelly bone like that, better off buried in the backyard of your life.
  • The thing is, that particular bit of stupidity had been over for months.
  • You have to listen to me, ____. Or you won’t understand.
  • So you won’t forget me. 
  • Why don’t you leave me alone?
  • It’s because I love you.
  • She’s sensitive, too. Takes to hurt the way water takes to paper.
  • You give this to her no matter what happens.
  • If this was another kind of story, I’d tell you about the sea. What it looks like after it’s been forced into the sky through a blowhole.
  • What can I tell you? I thought we were on a positive vibe.
  • What don’t you understand? I. Don’t. Want. To. Be. Here.
  • I just want some space to myself every now and then. Every time I’m with you I have this sense that you want something from me.
  • I just wish you’d say you love me.
  • Can you say you like me a lot?
  • Can you leave me alone? You’re such a pestilence.
  • Jealousy is the best way to jump-start a relationship.
  • They only hit you when they care.
  • The truth is there ain’t no relationship in the world that doesn’t hit turbulence. 
  • Our relationship wasn’t the sun, the moon, and the stars, but it wasn’t bullshit, either. 
  • Where are the stars?
  • We look good.
  • You’re a real bitch, you know that.
  • I didn’t want to come here. You made me.
  • If you didn’t want to come, why didn’t you have the fucking guts to say so?
  • This place is killing me.
  • And that’s when I know it’s over. As soon as you start thinking about the beginning, it’s the end.
  • God, you don’t have to be a pussy about it.
  • This can work. All we have to do is try.


  • I wanted to warn her, tell her he was a monster, but she was already headed for him at the speed of light.
  • In another universe I probably came out OK, but in this world I had a long dark patch of life like a mile of black ice waiting for me up ahead.
  • Remember the day we met?

Otravida, Otravez

  • Yes, but what if it had been me? What would you have done?
  • You have to learn to trust your men.
  • In those first days, I was so alone that every day was like eating my own heart.
  • She has a mouth like unswept glass—when you least expect it she cuts you.
  • How many get to this point? Only the ones who never swerve, who never make mistakes, who are never unlucky.
  • Please, please, my love, tell me what it is. How long did it take before I stopped mattering?
  • Why? Did you see anything wrong?
  • You must not think on these things. Keep them out of your mind. You do not want to go crazy from them.
  • Here there are calamities without end—but sometimes I can clearly see us in the future, and it is good.
  • I already told you it’s over. What else do you want?
  • You women never know how to leave things alone. You never know how to let go.
  • You are on your way to another life. You won’t have time to miss me.
  • Yes, I will. I’ll probably be over to visit you every day.
  • You won’t have the time.
  • I will if I make time. Are you trying to get rid of me?
  • I guess it’s true what they say: if you wait long enough everything changes.
  • This is what I know: people’s hopes go on forever.
  • I would never go back. Not for anything. Not for anyone.
“Not Your Fault” Spencer Reid

“Why are you even pretending you’re okay when you’re clearly not?”

You just looked at Reid like he was crazy for even thinking of asking that. You were sitting next to each other on the jet, like you always did, but it was only because he had joined you and not because you followed your habit. You wanted to be alone, but Reid never let that happen, even when you begged him to.

“Why are you pushing this when you know I clearly don’t want to talk about it?” you bite back, not being able to contain the anger and irritation that was eating you away. Reid didn’t even flinch, he’d handled your aggressiveness too many times before to let it get to him.

“Not talking about it isn’t going to solve it.” he countered back, letting his words out as a whisper, seeing as everyone else was drifting off to sleep. Sleep was the last on your mind. “(Y/N), that wasn’t your fault. Even if you had gotten there sooner, you couldn’t have saved them. It was a bomb, come to think about it, you would have died if you entered the building. It wasn’t your fault.”

But it was — as least in your mind. 10 people had lost their lives because you didn’t get to the unsub sooner, that’s what you kept telling yourself. You knew how this would end, stuck at home with your head buried in your pillow, tears falling from your face and sobs shaking your body, unanswered phone calls and dismissed messages. That was the worst part of the job, the realisation that you could have been better and faster, thus keeping lives intact. But you hadn’t.

“Aren’t we supposed to protect people? One another?” you glanced at JJ whose leg had been injured due to the explosion. “If we can’t do that, why are we doing this in the first place?”

Reid took a deep breath and turned his body to yours. “I said the exact same thing to Hotch when I thought Emily died. I know how you’re feeling, like your best isn’t even near enough but trust me, it’s more than enough. You’re one of the most skilled agents, both on field and off, the team wouldn’t be the same without you. I certainly wouldn’t.”

He takes your hand and begins fumbling it with his own, his eyes looking down at the scene. You know he wants to say something, the way he frowns and looks down is his tell, you’ve seen it happen hundreds of times before. Silently encouraging him to continue, you squeeze his hands and give him a small smile.

“It makes me sad when you undermine yourself because you have so much potential, so much worth. You do it all the time, not just with work stuff but with how you see yourself. I wish you’d see what I see.”

Reid had a habit of doing this, being so sweet it took you by surprise. You weren’t used to being told such heartwarming words, never in a completely genuine and honest situation. So every time the genius would say certain things, it would make your heart flip in your chest, his words meaning a lot more than you would ever show.

“I’ve never met someone like you, in fact, I never imagined someone like you could exist. I am not a believer of perfection nor will I ever be, but I do believe that you’re the closest to it I’ll ever find. You’re special, (Y/N). One of a kind. Why do you fall into the false belief that you’re not?”

You shrugged, still holding on to the hand he had offered. “I’ve never really had anyone in my life who made me feel like I was enough, I guess. Even when I did my best, I was expected more of and it drove me crazy. Things like that stick with you, no matter how long it’s been. There’ll never be a time when I don’t punish myself for not being what others need me to be.”

“Well,” Reid starts, looking over your every feature. “I only need you to be yourself. That’s what any of us need from you, nothing else. Maybe that cupcake recipe, though.”

You join him in soft laughter. For a moment, you stare at him, not hesitating before putting your arms around him and hugging him. Something about being in his arms made every single worry leave your body, every bad memory abandon your mind, every insecurity meet its end. The embrace was long and serene, neither person in any hurry to let go. He breathed deeply, savoring the feeling of your tight embrace.

Your eyes were closed and you knew you had to let go, the length of the hug was creeping into awkward territory, not that either would mind. You regretfully slid your hands off his shoulders and they came to rest on his arms, but your face remained where it was — tucked away in Reid’s neck. He felt you release him, but your body remained where it was. Were you done? He slowly pulled his head back, to find out what exactly this was now.

You had never looked into each other’s eyes from such a close proximity before, your lips had never been just inches apart. You felt overwhelmed with the warmth that radiated off Reid’s body and the sweet scent of his cologne, the way his eyes cast down to your lips and how he licked his own, how-

“Oh just do it!” Morgan snorted as he looked up from his phone, taking his headphones out. You sprint apart, almost like the poles of two different magnets, your face almost as red as your sweater. You glare at him furiously and get back to a normal sitting position, not daring to look the other man in the eye, knowing he would be just as flustered.

Ignoring Morgan’s teasing, Reid went back to the book he was reading and you simply sat and thought about a million things all at once, like you had before. You’d probably discuss what almost happened the day after, but for now. For now Reid’s fingers brush against your own, slowly intertwining your hands so that Morgan wouldn’t notice. And it was perfect, absolutely perfect.

“So about that cupcake recipe…”

Originally posted by somedaysiamgayerthanusual

King of the Kitchen

Word Count: 1227


(Sort of suggestive, with some fluff. And yes, I’m a newbie.)

You knew there was something wrong the moment you walked through the door.

After kicking off your boots with a relieved sigh, and undoing the knot that kept your hair tightly bound (all except your matrimonial braid), the feeling hit you like a strange, uncertain and glancing punch. Your steps stuttered to a halt as you tilted your head back, sniffing at the air. Wafting from somewhere was the smell of food, which wasn’t necessarily so wrong. Your stomach said so. The wrong part was that the smell never welcomed you when you got home. Ever. Usually you were the one cooking it, which said something about the situation that confronted you as you walked into the kitchen.

A dark cloud billowed from a pot on the stove, immediately you knew that the fire was too bright, too large, too hot. There was also something else (read: someone else) hot in the kitchen, who was the cause for the panic.

“Thorin?” you asked.

The King under the Mountain did look quite ridiculous holding a pot in one hand, and a wooden spoon in the mitten-covered other. He froze, turning to meet you with spare strands of hair plastered to the sweat or steam on his face. The rest had frizzed from the heat. Obviously, he was quite frazzled. His silver-blue eyes were wide.

“Y/N.” He placed the pot onto the bench too quickly, scattering the various bowls there and creating more of a mess.

“Stop, stop,” you cried, when the bowls shot over the edge of the stone bench in a marvelous cascade, and he fumbled to try and catch some. The others hit the ground, some cracking or chipping, others shattering or merely clanging. Nonetheless, it had made you cringe horribly as the sound echoed around the walls, making the situation seem more worse than it was.

He merely stood, afraid to touch anything else, while you ducked down to gather the fallen crockery.

Retrieving a dustpan and broom, you proffered them to him.

“Clean your mess.” Adorable fool.

If he wasn’t handy in the kitchen, he was handy with cleaning (though sometimes quite circumstantially, ‘urgent’ duties would pop up suddenly whenever you needed to clean). But he had done his fair share of sweeping, since Erebor hadn’t been given without a fight. There had been quite a substantial amount of rubble to clean up afterwards.

Which was probably why he was cooking for you.

The smell of charcoal filled your lungs and tore your eyes toward the stove. You doused the fire and took the pot off the heat. Whatever he had been trying to cook for dinner was nontangible from the blackened mess glued to the bottom.

“What were you doing, Thorin?” you asked.

He grumbled as he gathered all the splinters of clay. Something about ‘giving you a rest’ and a ‘surprise’.

“I believed that Balin told me you were on a hunting expedition, and a meeting with Bard afterwards.”

He avoided your eyes.

“And I suppose that the emergency Fili and Kili directed me to really was fake after all.”

From there you got the first audible response.

“I told them to think up a good excuse. I should have known.”

“Really?” you laughed, pulling him to his feet so that he faced you. “You sent those two rascals to distract me, thinking that it would work?”

The dent in his pride was still quite too large to be ignored with the deep-chuckle that you usually wrested from his chest.

“Hey,” you murmured softly. “Don’t fret.” King of Erebor, slayer of Azog the Defiler, unsettled by his less-than-satisfactory attempt in the kitchen?


“I appreciate the gesture, Thorin, I really do.” Your hands had travelled up his vast chest, feeling the strong thrumming of his heart through his thin tunic, and to his hair, smoothing the dark mane. “But there could have been other ways please me.”

He caught the double entendre. His eyes sparked, all hint of shame disappearing from his majestic form.

“Hmm…” His hands firmly fixed themselves to the small of your back, bringing you closer. “I could think of a few,” he agreed, his voice low.

“And you are very good at them.”

Thorin leant down to plant a kiss on your lips, but you pulled back, a grin on your face, for having pulled him into your trap. His hands were suddenly empty, the air cold from the absence of your warm breath on his face. His eyes flickered open.


“But that is not to excuse the mess you’ve made. After dinner, if there’s anything left to salvage, you are scrubbing everything clean, without Fili and Kili’s help-”

He muttered something at the loophole you had closed.

“-but for the time being, you will help me cook.”

As you tidied the kitchen as much as you could, finding it easier to organize your thoughts when your environment was neat, he stood by, trying not to get in the way.

With whatever provisions left in the pantry, you thought up a quick dish that would be ten times easier to stomach than whatever he had intended to feed you with earlier (but your heart was warm for the thought).

“Slice thinner, Thorin.”

“This is thin!”

“Like this.”

And you demonstrated.

“Crush the garlic.”

“Rah!” SLAM.

“I said, the garlic, not the house.”

The khuzdul oath rung throughout the house, being thrown back by the echoes.

“Thorin!” you admonished.

“What is this pain?” he growled, cradling his hand. Then he glanced up at you and the scowl disappeared under a mask of almost-disinterest. “Not that it pains me too much.” Somehow he had doused the entire thing with boiling water. Dwarves were known for their hardiness, their resistance to high temperature, but funnily enough there was something about the hot water that threw the king off. Water was supposed to put out the fire, not be the fire itself.

He muttered half-heartedly as you poured cool water over it, “I can bear it.”

“Stir the pot, Thorin- don’t splash! Now wipe that. Not with the clean towel, with the rag. The rag! That’s your sleeve – don’t expect me to wash your tunic.”

Thorin cooked like he fought, which was crazy. Brute strength, quick instinctive thinking, plenty of yelling, and he struggled to heed directions (well, what else could you expect from a king?) Though for his credit, he really did try (your wedding vows had held him to it).

An adorable bumbling fool he was reduced to, but one that you still loved and chuckled internally at. Alas, supper was saved, and he even helped you set up the table and serve.

“Cooking is more difficult than I thought,” he admitted, as he sat down, his spoon already loaded with the steaming meal. “You are owed more credit than you’ve been given, my love.” His bandaged hand found yours on the table.

Your cheeks flushed as they always did with the affectionate, crooned words.

“You can pay back your debt when you clean the dishes.”

“All of it?”

You grinned as you popped a spoonful of food in your mouth, your stomach rejoicing, chewing slowly and swallowing to add suspense. He waited patiently while eating, his eyes never leaving yours.

“Maybe only half.”

The remaining half was paid, however, that night, in a currency known only to lovers.

Through the Window (Part 27)

Sorry it took so long for this part, I’ve started uni again and it’s very hectic being a third year student!

Part 26
Part 27

TTW Masterlist for all other parts

Graduation had opened a new, weird, door for you and Bucky. The barbecue had been more fun than you expected it to be, finding that Nat was actually hilarious. Jabs were shot between everyone, but all in good humour. It had gotten to the point you’d all said worse to each other so a bit of harmless fun was fine. When everyone had left, you and Bucky went upstairs and passed out in your bed, opting to have the dreaded conversation in the morning.

When you wake up the following morning you find Bucky already awake, trailing his fingers down your arm.

“So.” Bucky starts when both of you are comfortable. “This has been a long time coming right?”

“Yeah.” You sigh, pulling Bucky’s arm around you and resting your head on his chest. “Where do you want to start?”

“Tell you what. Let’s do this twenty questions style. I’ll ask, you answer. Then we alternate until we’re done.”

“Sure let’s do it. You wanna go first?” You ask, tilting your head to look up at him.

“Do you still love Loki?”

Keep reading

What’s Love? || Hansol || Pt. 8

Pt. 1 // Pt. 2 // Pt. 3 // Pt. 4 // Pt. 5 // Pt. 6 // Pt. 7 // Pt. 8 // Final //

Word Count: 2037

Genre: fluff, romance, comedy, casual writing

Summary: You and Chwe Hansol never had good impressions on each other. Hansol always thought of you as a witch when you two were children and you thought that he was a devil sent from Hell to make your life miserable. Now that you were older, this childish rivalry hasn’t vanished but Hansol might be developing some feelings stronger than hate.

The day you got back from the trip, you were tired. Even with your parents asking for details, you couldn’t remember how much you told them exactly and how much you avoided telling them but they seemed satisfied. You dragged yourself into your room and didn’t come out for several days without begging and the calling of responsibilities. During the school days, you’d saunter past your classmates with a grim expression, not daring to look at them in case they started some type of conversation.  

Keep reading

All Over Again - Part 8

Part 1, Part 7, Part 9

„Are you free to talk? We have a lot to talk about.“ It was Megan standing in front of me. I was surprised, to say the least. Maybe this day wasn’t going to be this great after all.

“I don’t think there is something we need to talk about.” I replied. There really wasn’t.

“Oh, but there is.” she said pushing past me as she walked into my room. Okay then. I closed the door and turned to look at her. She got awfully comfortable as she was now sitting on my bed.

“We have to talk about Negan.” she said crossing her hands to her chest.

“What about Negan?” Playing stupid right now wouldn’t help since she already knew about my situation with him, but I did not know what else to do.

“What about him? Oh, I don’t know. What about the fact that when you met me in the showers you didn’t even bother to mention your name, or who you are for that matter? And then even though Dwight said that you are Negan’s wife, he came up to me and denied the whole story?” So he denied the whole thing, huh? Was this his way of covering it up?

“There really isn’t a specific answer to your questions and since I don’t really have to tell you any of this, what do you really want to know?”

“Who are you?”

“My name is Liz. I was with the group from Alexandria. I am pretty sure you’ve heard of us. There has been a war between the two groups for a long time now. One of us needed medical attention and we were heading to Hilltop because Dwight killed our doctor. Negan managed to trap us. He wanted to kill one of us but I offered myself to save my people. Turns out Dwight, Sherry and I knew each other since before the world went to shit. Dwight just likes to make jokes. A lot of them. There is nothing here, other than what I just told you. I am sure Negan would say the same.” I really hoped she would believe this version of the truth. Otherwise, this would only get more complicated and she would only have more questions.

“But Negan also knew Dwight and Sherry since before everything happened. How come you’ve never met him?”

“Well maybe I have and I just can’t remember.”

“And why did he drag you like a crazy person out of the kitchen area yesterday?”

“Because he is crazy? Besides, I am just a woman he took into his sanctuary a day ago. From a group that killed a dozen of his people. He doesn’t like me.”

“If he didn’t like you he wouldn’t have brought you in here. Perhaps there is something else.” she looked sceptical.


“Well, maybe he wants to make you a wife. He has done it before. And you are more than just pretty, that is obvious.” she said making me burst out laughing. I really wasn’t expecting this to be her conclusion. She was looking at me in a strange way as I was still laughing. After a few more seconds of me laughing and her looking at me like I was crazy I finally managed to control myself.

“I really doubt that that’s the case. Trust me.”

“We’re going to have to find out I guess.” she replied. I realised in that moment that this was my chance to ask her something as well.

“Do you love him? Is that why you’re asking me all of these questions?”

She looked a bit taken aback by my question and as if she was about to spill a secret that she fought really hard to keep.

“It’s more complicated than that. I have strong feelings for him. He saved my life. When he found me I was alone. The people that I have been with since the start were all gone. There was no hope for me. If he hadn’t shown up the exact moment he did maybe I would have been dead now. So, as you can understand I owe him a lot. When he asked me to become one of his wives I said yes. He was good to me in all ways. Like I told you that time in the showers, he really isn’t this bad. If you spend some time with him, if you get to know him and if he opens up to you, you’ll see it. He is a good man.”

“And did he? Open up to you?”

“Yes, he did. It took a lot of time and effort but he did. You know, he did have a wife. Before everything. I knew that he used to be married. He told me that she was tragically killed by those monsters. When he talked about her, he had the same look on his face like the one he had the night you arrived at the Sanctuary. And then Dwight said all of those things, I couldn’t help but think that somehow she survived. And that you were her.”

“Well, I am afraid that is not the case.” I replied. I needed some time to process all of this.

“Yeah I guess not.” she said looking down for a few seconds before she looked at me again. “I am really sorry for keeping you. I should go. And I am sorry for the way I talked to you, I just thought-“

“It’s okay. I understand.” I reassured her.

She nodded standing up from the bed and walking to the door. “See you around” she said. Offering me a smile as she walked out. I stumbled back and fell on the floor. Before I could realise what was happening I noticed I was crying. Again. Why am I crying again? What is wrong with me? He probably didn’t cry as much when he thought I was dead. It probably wasn’t hard for him when he moved on and got so close to her that he talked to her about me being dead and how much it saddened him. I wish I could really know what was going on through his head. But I don’t think he would ever tell me. Who knows? Maybe he would tell Megan.

This can’t go on like this. If this is the way he wants things to be, fine. I am not going to initiate conversation ever again. I am going to play the role of the new girl who hates his gut as best as I can. He chose things to be this way. There is nothing I can do to change his mind. It’s over.

Negan’s P.O.V

She is alive. She is fucking alive and she is here. She has been staying with us one day now and I still can’t believe it. But I saw her die. She died in front of my own fucking eyes. This changes everything. Her death is the reason why I changed who I am. Why I changed my perspective of things. I lost everything in that moment. My entire fucking world was turned upside down by her supposed death. I was a wreck for so long. For two weeks I searched for her in those woods. Looking, if she was anywhere. If she somehow had gotten out of it alive and she was looking for me too. It was when Dwight and Sherry talked some sense into me that I decided to finally let go of her.

But did I really let go of her? She was everywhere. All the time. Every time I saw a girl that looked like her I couldn’t even speak to her. For a really long time I thought that someday she would come back to me. That she would find her way back home. This place that I call home. That I built for her. She is standing here in front of me but it seems like we’ve missed out on so much of each other’s lives. All I can think about is the hell she must have gone through. The shitty things she was obligated to do in order to survive. And how I was not there to help her. To protect her. If someone fucking touched her and she hasn’t said a word about it, I don’t fucking know what I will do.

I am not blaming her, though. Why would she want to talk to me? I treated her like shit. Like she was nothing. I basically told her she means nothing to me anymore. And then there is Megan. It was never supposed to get this serious between me and her. I can’t really tell why she wants to be with me. Does she not know who I am and what I do? At first, I thought she was using me for her own protection. She can’t really do much against those fucking monsters. She is helpless. Now, I don’t know what she wants from me. She keeps asking questions about Liz. Perhaps she is suspecting something. I can’t have her know a thing about who Liz really is.

I need to keep her safe. The enemies I have gained ever since this whole fucking disaster are too many. Too dangerous. And I never had anything that they could use against me. Something so valuable that it would kill me to lose. But now that’s not the case anymore. I can never admit this to her, of course. She should never know how scared I am to lose her again. I have done my best, ever since she came here, to show her that we can’t be together.

I feel like I don’t know her anymore. She must have gone through so much. All of them must have gone through a lot. I see how Rick and the others are. So cautious. And they were so scared that night. But I couldn’t have done it any other way. If Liz hadn’t been there I probably would have killed one of them. But I didn’t. Because she asked me not to. I guess she still has that effect on me. My thoughts were interrupted by an all too familiar knock on my door. I got up from the couch and I realised I was dressed in just a white T-shirt and jeans. I          normally don’t like my people seeing me like this, but right now I don’t give a fuck. They kept on knocking.

“Will you fucking stop with the knocking? I am fucking coming.” They wouldn’t stop and I was ready to bash someone’s head in with Lucille. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“We need to talk.” Liz said with an unusual voice and she walked right into my room, pushing me out of the way. What is she doing here?

“Easy tiger. You almost knocked me down.” I joked but she wasn’t taking it. She kept a straight face on and had her hands inside her front pockets. Even though it hasn’t been more than three years since I last saw her she looked older. Not in a bad way. She was skinnier than I can remember. Her face looked pale and her eyes weren’t shiny anymore.

“This can’t go on like this. It has got to stop.” she stated.

“I really don’t understand what the fuck you’re talking about. Would you mind enlightening me, sweetheart?” I asked her.

“You need to stop with calling me sweetheart or darling or whatever the fuck you feel like it. I don’t like it so stop.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Okay, do you ever listen to me? I asked you to stop. I am not kidding and I don’t care why you’re doing it. But this ends now. Although this isn’t the reason why I am here. Are you alright? Have you hurt your head lately? Because there is no other explanation for your behaviour. Why are people coming up to me, asking me if I am your wife? Why is Megan the very first person who is going to knock on my door in the morning to talk to me about you? Well, basically to interrogate me about you? She told me all about how you’ve met, and how much you’ve helped her, and how much you mean to her. I don’t care and I thought you wanted to hide me away from the world. I thought that you don’t want people to talk about me. Guess what? You have achieved the exact opposite. And I don’t like it. I don’t want a constant reminder of everything that we lost. Of everything that you want to hide away because you are a coward. Yes, you’ve always been one. If you are not able to deal with reality, fine. But you need to grant me some peace and quiet. I don’t deserve this.” she was crying and screaming at me by now. What the hell has happened these past two days?

“Okay listen to me. You need to calm down. What are you talking about? What happened?” I said approaching her, trying to calm her down.

“No, don’t touch me. I can’t take this anymore. I can’t stand you anymore. If you want to push me out of your life fine. But do it in all kinds of ways. Don’t talk shit to me and then go kissing my neck. Do you want us to be over? Great. Then be a man about it.”

“You need to fucking stop talking this way, you get me? We’ve talked about this.”

“No. You have. You are the one who always talks. But you never listen. You never ask me what I have to say about this. You never want to know. You think you are so smart, don’t you? You believe that you know better than me and that I just have to follow your every order like I am one of those whores of yours. Well, guess what? I am not. Because they are the cheap ones, the easy ones. The ones who chose to open their legs to you in order to get by in this new world. And they are the only ones you can have. And that is proven. Isn’t it? If you want to sink that low, good for you. But I am not going to be a part of your miserable life. So cut me out of it. I want to spend time with my friends. I am happy they are alive and well. But I want nothing to do with you. I am done.”

I looked at her stunned. I didn’t know what to answer first but she obviously didn’t need a response. She stormed out of the room banging the door on her way out. Now I was more focused on one certain thing. Something I was never expecting from her. I picked it up from the ground and stared at it. It had a few scratches and the colour had faded a bit, but there was nothing else wrong with it. I walked to my nightstand and searched under my clothes. I found what I was looking for and lied on my bed holding both of them in my hands. I never thought she would feel so pressured to throw her wedding ring at me. She was a wreck. And I made her feel this way. I have to talk to her when she calms down. It’s not over.

If anyone else wants to get tagged, let me know.

@msjamesmarch @lilred91 @bbgmichael @studying4meonly @whovianwithabox @nijiru @laaadygisbooornex3 @greene-queen @ioanashalala @mygoldenmile @uhjeffreydeanmorgan @toxic-ink @captaincupcakequeen @kathyjimenezg1 @kizzy-angellips @lost-in-the-stories

A scene from my regular life:
  • Take old bread out to the back yard to feed the crows.
  • Stand on the deck to watch my birdies.
  • Stomp back out into the back yard to shoo away the seagulls, while the crows perch back up in their tree, squawking in agreement with me.

Yes, I prefer to feed the crows and the squirrels, not the seagulls. What? You certainly didn’t expect anything else, did you?

Song Lyrics Preference- Photograph by Ed Sheeran

Okay so I’m new at the whole imagine/preference thingy but every time I listen to this song I always want to write something based off some of the lyrics so I’m just gonna go for it! Hope you like it :)


“When I’m away
I will remember how you kissed me
Under the lamppost
Back on 6th street”

“12:14AM.” you read aloud to yourself as you looked down at your watch.

You hadn’t even realized how late it was already and you began to feel disappointed because he promised he would call you tonight. Your boyfriend, Ashton had been away on tour for 5 months and his calls seemed to be the only thing you looked forward to since he left, even though they didn’t always happen with his busy schedule. After slowly changing into your pjs, you slipped into bed and stared at the ceiling, sleep feeling a million miles away. You lied there for awhile, contemplating whether or not you should call him when you heard the familiar sound of his ringtone blasting on your phone. Just hearing that song calmed you and you instantly felt better. 

“Hello?” You answered, a feeling of warmth overturning in your stomach.

“Babygirl, I miss you so much.” the familiar voice of your boyfriend Ashton said on the other side of the phone.

“I miss you too Ash… More than I can even take anymore.” You said, a tear slipping down your cheek.

“Just a few more months (y/n), I know we can stay strong till then.” He said, sounding so sure of himself.

“Babe I really don’t know how you stay so strong, I feel so lonely without you.”

“You wanna know what I do, love? I think how you kissed me under the lamppost…” 

As Ashton said this you immediately remembered that moment. The sky was cloudy but still beautiful. The air was cold but you were warm in his jacket. The street was quiet but your heart was beating loudly. He was walking you home to your parent’s house on 6th street but you didn’t want the night to end yet so you had sat down on the old bench under the lamppost just one house away from your home. You had been giving him plenty of hints that it was time for him to finally kiss you goodnight but he didn’t seem to understand. With the clouds covering the stars, the lamppost was the only light you had and you remembered how many times he called you beautiful even though you thought that light was unflattering. You finally couldn’t take it anymore and you leaned in and kissed his lips with a soft force that seemed to make both of your lips almost melt together and you remembered how that moment seemed to last a lifetime. Remembering this instantly made you feel better and you realized how Ashton stayed strong; he used the thought of being able to kiss you again, the thought of your lips melting together and your hands intertwining. 

“I love you so much Ashton, we can do this baby, just two more months.” you said with a smile on your face.

“Two more months my love, two more months until we get to kiss again.”


“When it gets hard
You know it can get hard sometimes
It is the only thing that makes us feel alive”

There you were again, lying in the bathroom trying not to let the pain win again. Trying not to make feeling like dying the thing that makes you remember you’re alive. 

“(y/n)? Where are you? Dammit.” You heard a deep voice say through the door, “I’m coming in!”

“Michael, I’m fine! I promise!” You holler just before he pushes the door open. 

“Don’t you dare do anything to yourself, you’re beautiful and nothing anyone says, or does is gonna change that.” Michael says as he reaches for your hand to pull you off the floor.

“I’m fine Michael, really I am.” you say through tears that fall from your eyes.

“You don’t have to lie to me, I don’t care that you’re fucked up, remember?” He smiles and you somehow find the desire to laugh.

“You’re crazy for being here for me all the time, you know that?”

“Well, obviously but what else are best friends for?”

You and Michael had been best friends for 3 years. You don’t know why or how but he always stuck around even when you lost yourself, unlike others’ did. Your own parents didn’t even know how to understand you and today, this was the reason you broke down. You had just gotten home after having dinner with your parents and like always they expected so much from you and acted disappointed that you weren’t “taking your future seriously like we did when we were your age.” They didn’t tell you they were proud of you for what you had accomplished so far, but rather that they were disappointed that you hadn’t done even more. 

“I just can’t do this anymore, Mikey, I’m not strong enough.”

“Then do it for me (y/n),” He says and you look up at him, confused, “Do it for me because I love you and I need you here with me.”

“Michael, I-”

“No just listen to me,” he cuts you off, “I love you so much, more than this friendship we have created, more than as the one who is there for you. I love you so much and sometimes, even though I’ll never let you see, knowing that I love you and that you might love me too is the only thing that keeps me strong and helps me feel alive.”

“Michael….I…I love you too,” you say, a strange but warming feeling in your chest, “And obviously you know that I need you, and you make me feel alive every time you look at me and I-”

And again he cut you off, but this time with a kiss that you had no idea you had been waiting for since the moment you met him. A kiss that made you feel special, made you feel happy but most of all… made you feel alive.


“So you can keep me
Inside the pocket
Of your ripped jeans
Holdin’ me closer
‘Til our eyes meet”

July 2nd, 2015. 7:00AM. The day you had been dreading for the past month was finally here and the feeling it gave you was just as terrible as you expected. Your boyfriend, Luke, was starting his North American tour in a week and he was off to LA today. His flight was in a little over two hours and you both knew that this would be the last moments of cuddling you would get for the next several months. 

“I wish this day wouldn’t have come as fast as it did.” you say, getting out of bed to make sure he had everything he needed for his trip. 

“I don’t wanna get out of bed yet, I just want to stay with you babe.” He says, his voice deep from tiredness.

“I know Luke, me too, but I don’t want you to miss your flight because I know how important this is to you.” 

“Fine, ugh.” He steps out of bed and ruffles his hand through is messy hair.

“Hurry up, we have to leave in 20 minutes!” You tell him.

“My plane doesn’t leave for another 2 hours!” He complains and for the fifth time that week you explain to him that you have to be there extra early for international flights.

When you finally help him get completely ready to go, you both hop in the car and he takes your hand as he drives you both to the airport.

“Hey babe, you brought that polaroid camera that I got you right?” he asks as he pulls the car into the airport parking lot.

“Yeah I always have it, why?”

“Just making sure…”

You walk through the doors of the terminal where Luke’s plane is flying out of and you see the familiar faces of the other members of his band. After greeting them and at the same time saying your goodbyes to them, you turn to Luke and both of you wrap your arms around each other. The tight embrace not lasting nearly as long as you wish it could. He lets go of you and grabs the camera from your bag and hands it to Ashton.

“Hey ash, can you take a picture of me and (y/n) real quick?”

“Wait what? Why Luke?” you ask him, confused as to what he was up to now. 

“I want a picture of us to keep with me while I’m away.”

Hearing him say that makes you smile and you hug him tightly as tears begin to fall. 

“I can’t take a picture looking like this.” you say, trying make the tears stop.

“That’s okay,” Ashton says, “I took one when you guys were hugging on accident.. I guess you could use that if you want.”

He hands Luke the picture and a smile molds from the sides of his mouth.

“It’s perfect baby, look.” he whispers as he hands you the photograph. 

“You’re right.. I love it.” you smile and reach up to kiss him.

“I love you, and i’ll miss you. See you in 7 months beautiful.”

“7 months baby. 7 long, lonely-” 

“Oh shut up.” He laughs and kisses you one last time before pushing the photograph in his pocket and turning to leave.

“I love you!” you shout to him as he walks away.

“I love you too, (y/n), and I’ll always have you with me.”


“Oh you can fit me
Inside the necklace you got when you were 16
Next to your heartbeat
Where I should be”

“Baby? Are you home?” you hear your boyfriend shout from the door.

“I’m in the room love!” you call to him.

He walks into the room to see you lying on the bed and instantly a smile forms on his face. 

“Why hello there beautiful, how are you?” he says and jumps next to you on the bed, kissing your forehead.

“I’m okay… I can’t find my necklace though and I’ve looked everywhere and I’m so worried because my grandma gave it to me when I was 16 and I never take it off.” you say, worried.

“Hey, calm down okay? I took it baby, I went to see if anyone could actually get that old locket to open, I should’ve told you and I’m sorry I just really wanted to surprise you.” he sighs and hands a box.

“Wait what? Really? Did they fix it? Does it open? It’s been stuck since I got it, I never even thought of getting it fixed.” you question, excitement growing in your voice.

“Yeah really! Just open it and see!” He says, mimicking your level of excitement as your fingers lift the lid off the cardboard box he handed you.

You reached into the small box and pulled out your locket, quickly attempting to open the heart-shaped metal piece that hung from the chain. It opened and you immediately closed your eyes as tears of joy slipped through your eyelids. It really opened, the necklace you’ve had for three years that your grandma gave to you just before she passed away. 

“Wait no, don’t cry.” Calum whispered, grabbing your hand. “At least not until you see what’s inside…”

You opened your eyes and gave Calum a questioning look through your tears as you reopened the locket. You looked inside to see your favorite picture of your boyfriend and you couldn’t help but plaster a huge smile on your face.

“Calum,” you said through your grin, “This is amazing thank you so much.”

Both of you wrapped your arms around one another and smiled. You couldn’t stop looking at the necklace and every time you did, your smile seemed to grow larger. 

“I did it for you baby, now you can keep me close, always. Even when I leave for tour or writing, I’ll always be with you. Right next to your heart, just like I should be.” He smiled, leaning in to kiss your forehead. 

“I love you so much Cal.”

“I love you too , (y/n). Always.”

I hope you enjoyed that! I wanna write more but I don’t know if I’m any good at this haha x -mandy