what do you tag things like this with


Bias Selfie Tag/Childhood pic tag

Tagged by (this list has been building up for the past month or so, im sorry!): @jungkookio @nyeong-ing @gotchicken @leaderbum @tensxgirl @jingogi @sho-ho-hownu @imeightout  Thanks for tagging me guys. I love all of you <3

I found this pic of Mark and Joey (his lil bro) so i wanted to do the Bias Selfie Tag with a twist and do like a childhood thing because I’ve done the bias selfie tag the same way multiple times before. Anyway thats my older sister and me (I’m the small one) in front of my grandma’s house in Japan <3. 

Tagging (people that i dont usually tag. You guys don’t gotta do it if you dont want to): @poeticyoungjae  @got7arrived @cutepimook @jjjoonie @marksseunie  

Pop-Up Prompt!

Write About: Hollow

Recently watched a playthrough of a game called Hollow Knight and thought that the word Hollow could inspire some great poems! 

Game Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAO2urG23S4

The prompt is to just write about the word Hollow and whatever it evokes in you. There are no rules. Anyone can participate as much or as little as they want and you can make up analogies and metaphors and interpret things your own way, but if you want me to see what you write for the prompt, you have to make one of your FIRST FIVE tags #PardyPrompt so that I am sure to see it on the tagged page (https://www.tumblr.com/tagged/pardyprompt). You can also submit your piece to me if you’d like to, but be sure to check off the #PardyPrompt tag as well. You do NOT have to personally tag me in your posts, and if I ever miss something you’ve written, just shoot me a message and I’ll check it out.

@heartmarierose yes, we do. At least, those of us who are active in the #actuallyautistic tag tend to have a good idea who the other active people are and what their special interests are, especially where they overlap because we tend to infodump on each other.

Ever seen a those tumbler posts where someone shares a random fact and says how it’s cool, then someone else proclaims MY TIME HAS COME! And then tells you everything about that subject?

We do that with each other every time something even remotely related to our SI comes up, and we actively look for ways to relate things back to our SI. And like, we often get as much joy listening to other people infodump as we do to actually infodumping.

So like, I can tell you that @kcomplexes loves sleep related things, @paxardens loves chemistry, @stumble-tumble-bumble loves gel pens, @keelan-666 loves Voltron, @defectivegembrain loves buffy - willow and tara especially, @strangerdarkerbetter is a HP fan and Dr. Who, while @butterflyinthewell is Dr. Who and Dragonball. Heck, most of them have more than one SI.

I could send you to people with an SI for maths, trains, music, singing, writing, autism, adhd, psychology, Sociology, art, computers, programming, feminism, feminist history, queer history, black American history, linguistics, and like twenty people for Steven Universe.

Imagine if you had a world of people that, even if the didn’t understand what you were talking about, would listen to you talk about materials engineering for forever and a day, asking questions, dragging more info from you, and encouraging you to spill everything.

That’s what we do because we know own that we will get our chance to infodump too.

It is just such a fundamental makeup of who we are (in most cases - not all of us have special interests) that it is hard to spend a lot of time around other autistics and not notice what their SIs are.

I love it!

Can I just say this fandom can be so fucking toxic? You scream for something, SJM provides, and you bitch and whine like a ton of babies who didn’t like what you got!

Why the fuck do you keep reading, keep updated, and keep trolling if you don’t like the books? Like seriously?

I just do not get it. Do you thrive on tearing people / the things they enjoy down just because it doesn’t align with what you view as pure and correct? I’m sure this’ll get ripped into but I can’t even go into any of the tags without some pissy whiny bullshit.

Rant over. Fucking hell.

anonymous asked:

This morning, I read a post from a mother about her 19 year old daughter who is dying of cancer. They just found out that she has another brain tumor (she had her first when she was just 15) and that she doesn't have much time left. They are planning her funeral, together. And then i come on this site and people are complaining about little things and tagging it with "fml." Well, feel lucky that you have a life to complain about. It could be much worse.

I see where you’re coming from, I do. But the fact that someone’s problems are bigger that other people’s does not invalidate said people’s problems. Theirs are valid too. Because these are the problems that are affecting their lives. Is it fair for some to suffer more than others, in what seems like a completely arbitrary way? Fuck no. But life isn’t fair. So we have to make the most of it in whatever way we can.

Lots of love <3

Get to Know Hazel

I was tagged by my buddy @jpadjackles!

Rules: Tag 9 people to do this too.

  1. Are you named after someone? Yes, my middle name comes from my great grandma.
  2. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday but barely because I was super frustrated with lots of little things
  3. Do you like your handwriting? Yeah!
  4. What is your favorite lunch meat? Ham
  5. Do you have kids? Nooooo
  6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you? Probably not because I’m so quiet and awkward and hard to get to know HAHA
  7. Do you use sarcasm? Too often, probably
  8. Do you still have your tonsils? Nope. Got those taken out when I was four. 
  9. Would you bungee jump? Mmmm probs not
  10. What is your favorite kind of cereal? Honey Bunches of Oats
  11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Ain’t nobody got time for that
  12. Do you think you’re a strong person? Yeah, I do alright
  13. What is your favorite ice cream? Mint Chocolate Chip
  14. What is the first thing you notice about people? Physical appearance, facial expressions… but that’s the same for everyone really. Our brain registers all that super quick. 
  15. What is the least favorite physical thing you like about yourself? Uhhhh…. my feet? I mean, they’re nice and narrow but they’re feet. Lol
  16. What color pants and shoes are you wearing now? Jeans, black sandals
  17. What are you listening to right now? Some music
  18. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Probably the red of my hair
  19. Favorite smell? Coffee
  20. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? My boyfriend
  21. Favorite sport to watch? NONE
  22. Hair color? Red
  23. Eye color? Green
  24. Do you wear contacts? No….stupid glasses….
  25. Favorite food to eat? Sandwhiches
  26. Scary movies or comedy? Comedy
  27. Last movie you watched? Sing!
  28. What color of shirt are you wearing? Off-white with some gray in it
  29. Summer or winter? Summer
  30. Hugs or kisses? Hugs
  31. What book are you currently reading? The Advocate by Randy Singer
  32. Who do you miss right now? Nobody… I’m a stone cold soulless ginger. Hehe.
  33. What is on your mouse pad? People still use mousepads? LOL
  34. What is the last tv program you watched? Once Upon a Time
  35. What is the best sound? Great music
  36. Rolling Stones or The Beatles? Is it bad I don’t know?
  37. What is the furthest you have ever traveled? New Orleans, LA
  38. Do you have a special talent? Some people would say writing, I suppose
  39. Where were you born? Indiana

Tagging peeps I don’t know very well: @luciisthebest @impandagrl @super-not-naturall @wi-deangirl77 @i-stare-sometimes @revwinchester @amanda-teaches

Tagged by @emotionalmorphine.

Is there a snack you like to eat while writing?: I don’t usually eat while writing. Sometimes I’ll eat before, like if I’m watching something on Youtube or during lunch, or occasionally after a good session I’ll treat myself to a snack.

What time of day do you usually write?: Whenever I can eek out the time.

Where do you write?: My desktop, mostly. Recently I’ve been using my laptop to write at school.

How often do you write a new fic?: Idk? Whenever I finish the last one, I’ll pick something new to write about. I don’t like to leave a fic unfinished anymore before I start new ones. Learned my lesson from my ff.net days.

Do you listen to music while you write?: Usually. I have a playlist on spotify with a lot of piano and guitar covers of popular music because instrumental and acapella songs really do it for me. Sometimes I find it distracting though, so I’ll occasionally have just a single earbud in or not listen to music at all.

Paper or laptop?: Compuuuuter. I haven’t written paper fics since I was fifteen.

Do you have a special pre-writing ritual?: No? Those are a thing? Shoot, where do I get me one of those? :P

What do you do to get into the writing?: Read what I wrote last, daydream for a bit. Sometimes this involves getting up and walking around the house (if it’s empty) and going through the next scene or lines of dialogue out loud.

What do you always have near the place you write?: A can of Pepsi. Or tea. Cold and sweet enough to rot your teeth and your mind.

Do you have a reward system for word counts?: Not really. Sometimes I’ll do word sprints with some of my friends in the DA Weird Shit Discord to see if I can keep up with some of them, but otherwise word counts have never really mattered. Though, I don’t usually post a thing to AO3 unless its around 3k words or for some sort of gift/challenge.

Is there anything else about your writing process your readers don’t know?: I used to plan out my fics. I was meticulous. This happens there, that happens here. I don’t have time for that anymore, so I just write whatever and wherever the story wants to go. I generally have an idea I’m working from and establish a few hard rules about how the universe functions, but mostly I just write and let the characters evolve naturally and hope I get the ending I want.

Sometimes I’ll do research for really obscure things, like how snakes mate. (Don’t ask. You might not want to know, lol.)

I will sometimes get really great ideas in the strangest of places. Like in the car on my commute to/from school or the shower. Sometimes I’ll think about stuff as I’m falling asleep in the hopes that it’ll feed into my dreams and give me some sort of writing epiphany. (To my knowledge, this has yet to happen, but it doesn’t stop me from trying.)

I tag @pikestaff, @mikkeneko, @laughlikesomethingbroken, @therealmnemo, @legoprime, @dirtycorzaharkness, @laurpas, @noirearrowshoot.

anonymous asked:

Hello. I'm 19 years old and I'd like to become a sb seeing as I really need the money. Though I must admit I'm quite scared of being taken advantage of and messing things up. Do you have any general tips for me?

You should go through my sugar baby advice tag and my blog!! This is a super general question so i’m not sure exactly what advice to give. I wish i could be more helpful, so if you have any more questions message me!!

Writing Meme

Tagged by @earlgreyer1

Is there a snack you like to eat while writing?   I like to have something special to drink while I sit down for a formal writing session. Starbucks, or something of the more adult variety. If I try to snack on actual food I end up just sitting there eating, though.

What time of day do you usually write? Any chance I get. The muses are most active late at night, or when I’m somewhere I’m not supposed to be writing. They absolutely love tempting me to write during class or at work. I mean to experiment by going somewhere public to write but I haven’t tried it yet.

Where do you write? Wherever I can. I tend to get a lot more done with pen and paper than I do going right to the computer though. I’m actually actively avoiding writing right this second.

How often do you write a new fic? Not often enough.

Do you listen to music while you write? No way. If it has lyrics, I want to sing along or memorize them. If it’s just sound, it’s distracting. The best white noise for me to write to is the sound of other people talking. Sometimes I can do it with the tv on.

Paper or laptop? Paper. I connect better, there are less distractions, and when I do go to type it up it forces me to edit and reevaluate right then and there.

Do you have a special pre-writing ritual? Not really, no.

What do you do to get into the writing? Beg and plead with the muses if it’s something I’ve been struggling with. Close my eyes and try to be there in the scene I’m planning to write.

What do you always have near the place you write? Something to drink and more paper.

Do you have a reward system for word counts? Not really. Maybe the emotional high of momentarily thinking I’m actually good at it before the next wave of doubt rolls in.

Is there anything else about your writing process your readers don’t know? Aside from wanting to hand write everything and hear people having conversations around me? My writing process is so wild. I can’t really plan for it and I have more success waiting for something to strike than trying to force it, but I know I need to keep writing no matter luck. When it’s going well it almost feels like being possessed. It just happens, no thought or input for me, and it’s such an amazing feeling that when it’s not like that it’s so hard to trust anything I’ve done.

I was tagged by @variasuitgirl to write 5 things I like about myself and tag 10 people.

1) When I put my mind to it, I push myself to new levels I didn’t even know I could reach

2) I like my personality, I’m definitely a bit of a weirdo but I like that about me

3) I like being the “shy at first but then crazy later” kinda friend, it’s like a timeline of how people get to know the real me

4) That I literally don’t care what anyone’s opinion on me is, I live for me and me alone. Your stance won’t change how I wish to live my life

5) That my biggest goal is to help people and make them smile. That’s why I work my hardest, because I want every person to experience happy days and be content with their lives as I am

Now I tag: @definitelynotwinter, @hatsune-miku-was-here, @wingedswordsman, @dfordragos, @yurinnocent, @safelolicuteness, @toxicglucose, @the-fragile-knight, @nonmormonutahn, @pink-is-mine-forever

@askghostking can go fuck himself

Rules: Tag 20 people you’d like to know better!

Nickname: Matt, Maft, I get called ‘boi’ enough for it to be a nickname, lentil

Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius

Height: 5'2 - 5'3 depending on the shoes I’m wearing

Last Thing you Googled: 'Can blind people use smart phones’ (I asked my mom and she told me to google it)

Favorite Music Artist: bOy do I love Troye Sivan-

Song stuck in my head: Killing Me Softly

Last Movie you Watched: Make Happy

What are you wearing right now?: A gray tanktop and a red and black plaid onsie tied around my waist

Why did you choose your URL?: the galaxy prince was taken (my insta acct user) and this was on of the ones tumblr suggested for me

Do you have any other blogs?: I have my old blog but I switched to this one?? So no

What did your last relationship teach you?: 
Man she’s a fucking bitch

Religious or Spiritual: neither

Favorite Color: man I really love the colour blue

Average hours of sleep: 5/6/7 hours depending on the homework I have

Lucky numbers: idk I dont have one but my favourite number is 5324

Favorite Characters:
• Lance Mcclain
• Riley from symptoms of being human
• Piper Mclean
 • there’s more but let’s not get into that

How many blankets do you sleep with: I always have one blanket underneath me bc I dont like the texture of my bedsheets, and I normally just have my duvet but as of recent I’ve had another bc I’ve just been going to bed in my boxers and it gets cold

I’m tagging @seaprincejackson, @trulyfandomtrash, and @dragonfuryflame for the giggles

writing meme

@professionallilbrocarverhawke and @somanyjacks both tagged me so i should definitely do this! :o

Is there a snack you like to eat while writing? coffee, almost always. but not fod

What time of day do you usually write? pretty much whenever.  i haven’t got a strict schedule but in theory try to write 100 words a day, however that happens. (usually late)

Where do you write? on the couch, or on my bed of i need to lie down (thnx chronic back pain)  

How often do you write a new fic? kind of always? i try to focus on one or two things at a time, though, so i just write ideas down to revisit

Do you listen to music while you write? pretty much always, as long as it’s instrumental

Paper or laptop? i write on my laptop, but i do have a notebook that i sometimes use for brainstorming/outlining. crossing things out is satisfying

Do you have a special pre-writing ritual? lots of fidgeting to get comfortable, but that’s not really a “ritual”

What do you do to get into the writing? reread what i’ve written, if i have anything. sometimes i shower or clean something in the house while i’m planning/brainstorming. also i bounce ideas off my roommate @eugenideswalksintoabar. talking things through helps me figure out what works and what doesn’t, and when something does, i get excited, which helps a lot (writing stuff i’m not excited about is the worst)

What do you always have near the place you write? ideally, a cat. realistically, a glass of water

Do you have a reward system for word counts? no. i write for as long as i can, then i take a break. it’s more timing than length for me

Is there anything else about your writing process your readers don’t know? Hannah (@eugenideswalksintoabar) is an essential part of my process. it’s fun to brainstorm together, and she’s not afraid to tell me when i’m not being funny or not communicating my point well. i bring lots of bad jokes to her and we hone them into quality shitposts together (and she betas my longer stuff when grad school isn’t eating her brain)

i’ll tag…. @eugenideswalksintoabar (no surprise there) and @plenoptic07 and @milkymaccha and anyone else who wants to do this!! <3

Am I the only one that doesn’t care at all that Mon El said that he loved Kara before Sanvers have said it? Like the relationship between Kara and Mon El is messy and lacks development, so I’m not surprised that he said that he loved her so quickly. In all honesty he may not even truly love her, she’s just the first person he’s truly been attached to and not a hook up, which he was doing on Daxam. 

BUT Sanvers has been developed and I’m just waiting for that special moment that they actually say it. Not some type of “I’m saying this cause I don’t want to lose you bullshit,” but they say it cause it’s true. Cause they truly can’t live without one another and love each other, ride or die. When they do say it, it will be impactful and not easily forgotten like Mon El’s confession.

Everything you need to know about my middle brother can be summed up by the fact that one time someone asked him if he could do a front flip. And despite having *no idea if he could do one or not* he *immediately* launched himself face forward.

And actually pulled it off perfectly.

And then broke his nose when he landed doing a “ta-dah” pose and accidentally slamming his head into his knee.



Aaaaah anyway omg I’m FREAKING OUT!

THANK YOU SO SO SO SO SOOOOOO MUCH @glitteryandpeachy and @kittykatmaniac ! This is so amazing and awesome and HHHH I dunno so hard to believe that I can have them in my hand like this!!



I love you so much aaaah thanks you!

*spazzing intensifies*

how to not be an asshole and still maintain your moral standards

because it seems that for a lot of people there’s nothing in-between “I don’t like x thing because it’s bad for x reason and if you disagree then you are evil scum” and “yeah sure do whatever you want!!! give everyone a chance to express their creativity/opinions no matter what!!!!”

1. Know your shit.

One of the easiest things to do is to make yourself look like an idiot because you didn’t bother to look for more information. Before you form your opinion, be sure to rationally look at both sides of an argument and do as much fact-checking you can before you give your input. This goes for anything. Politics, shipping discourse, what have you. 

(something to note: not everything works the same in other countries as it does in your country.)

2. If necessary, make a distinction between what is genuinely harmful/derogatory and what upsets you personally.

This is important especially when someone asks you how you feel about a certain subject. There is a difference between Actual Pedophilia and “there is nothing Technically wrong with this ship but the age gap is big enough that the potential for a power-imbalance bothers me greatly, and I want no part of this”.

3. Don’t start shit.

Callout posts, angry messages, and witch hunts. Anon or not, just don’t do it. You might think you’re doing the right thing, but you’re probably just going to make people want to spite you instead of listen. Calling someone names or telling someone to kill themself is shitty.

Also, don’t infest someone’s tag with opinions they don’t want to see. If you feel the need to vent but don’t want to start discourse, use read mores and slashes inbetween words (li//ke thi//s) so that it won’t show up in the tag.

 Now, I’m not saying you have to be completely passive about things you don’t like, but there are other things you can do to avoid them, like…..

4. Just block people.

Let me say this again.


Or unfollow them. It’s super easy. One click, and they’re gone. 

You’re allowed to have opinions. So are other people. And guess what, you don’t have to look at them. Shocker. 

If you’re going to post something and it would make you uncomfortable if people gave it context that you specifically don’t like, say it. State it clearly, and let people know that if they do it anyway, they’ll get blocked.

Think of it this way: if you throw a party and someone shows up and starts doing things and telling jokes etc that make you uncomfortable, what do you do? You don’t invite them to the next party. And if they weren’t invited to begin with, then you take extra precaution to make sure they don’t come again.

Remember, it’s your blog. It’s your party. You’re the host, and yeah you want to make sure your guests are happy, but you can still set boundaries. How much tolerance you have is up to you.

(see also: blacklist. I’ve surprisingly never used it. But it can very easily control what kinds of content you see or don’t see.)

5. Be patient.

If someone is doing something harmful, it’s possible they just don’t know better. People are limited by their life experiences and might not know to think differently because they never knew they could.

People change. What were you like a year ago? Five years ago? Ten years ago? I highly doubt that you’re proud of everything you’ve said and done in the past. There were jokes I’ve said and things I’ve liked that I would never dream of saying now.

This is why I think it’s so, so important to not immediately condemn someone. People don’t often make complete 180s, so don’t expect them to. People don’t like being told they’re wrong, and might need take some time to sort out their thoughts/unlearn their behavior before substantial change happens. Does this excuse their behavior? No, of course not. Even without ill-intent, people can absolutely still do damage.

6. Know when to speak.

This can go a lot of ways. Certain fights aren’t yours to fight. Don’t talk over anyone else. Admit when you don’t know enough about something to give a proper opinion. Recognize when something isn’t worth the time or energy.

Also: learn to recognize traps. People will try to send “gotchas” disguised as innocent questions. These are usually done with the intent of twisting your words and making you sound problematic no matter your response. Even if you’re not sure, just don’t respond. Avoid confrontation and discourse whenever you can. Resist being petty if you know that it’d just start more drama.

That’s it. I hope y’all can go out and try to be decent people. Have fun. Your internet experience is up to you. You don’t need to make it someone else’s responsibility.

It’s been all fun and games with me and my tarot cards, but lately I’ve been craving some depth. Some darkness. Some shadow work.

And while that’s not very May-esque, shadows don’t confine themselves to darkness, now do they?

So here is a little challenge if you would like to join in with me. I’ll be using tarot, but oracle cards will work just as well, or a combination therein. Most of the days will be one card pulls, but there are some two and three card questions as well. Feel free to pull more cards if desired.

Many of the questions ask “why” as well as the main question. For the “why” questions, I like to look at the card on the bottom of my deck for the answer.

Feel free to share or do this in private, everyone has their own needs when it comes to personal insights, I’m not going to tell you what to do with yours. Use the tag #shadow of may if you would like to share with us. Starts May 1st.

  1. How do I feel about the idea of “love”?
  2. How do I express love?
  3. How do I treat others | How do I treat myself?
  4. What does “self love” mean to me?
  5. How am I right now?
  6. What am I thinking and feeling? How is my environment?
  7. How do I feel about being alone? Why?
  8. What can solitude help me with?
  9. How do I feel about solitude | How do I feel about loneliness?
  10. What three things makes me happy?
  11. What is limiting my happiness? Why?
  12. How do I deal with criticism?
  13. Where do I gain my confidence?
  14. What do I minimize about myself? What do I flaunt?
  15. How do I perceive pain?
  16. How do others’ pain affect me?
  17. How do I feel about death?
  18. What has been conditioned in me about death?
  19. How can I embrace death?
  20. What provokes me to anger? Why?
  21. How do I show hate?
  22. What is the root of my hatred?
  23. What is my hatred to my energy levels?
  24. How do I express myself?
  25. What three things do I most value?
  26. What is my direction in life? What is my purpose?
  27. How do I feel about my accomplishments?
  28. What makes me feel fulfilled?
  29. How can I learn from my mistakes?
  30. How do I listen? How do I speak?
  31. What do I need to explore?
Bts reaction to you giving them a blowjob in the dorm

Request:  Can I request a bts reaction to their gf giving them a blowjob in public like at the dorm while the other boys are around


“Y/n, I don’t know what are you thinking but be fast…B-baby. If you do that, I can’t keep quiet.”

Originally posted by chimcheroo


“Y/N, let them hear. So, now you are shy? Faster baby. Move this perfect mouth of your.”

Originally posted by bestteamofsoulmates


“At this point…damn it, don’t tease. Do this one more time and at this point, I won’t give a fuck who hears.”

Originally posted by choke-me-namjoon


“Although no one will come, I suggest you being…that’s it baby, a littl-little faster.”

Originally posted by morekpopmore


“Are you aware that anyone can come and we’ll…oh fuck. Fuck what I said, continue.”

Originally posted by theholyshiteu


“They have heard how I fuck you, I’m not sure they care at this point. Deeper baby, you can take it deeper.”

Originally posted by kaiinyourarea


“Look at you, a little pretty thing. Why do I feel like you have a kink of being caught? Don’t worry. I don’t exactly care who comes in either.”

Originally posted by jikookfantasy



Also we are playing “Would you rather” so tag along.

*Requests are closed*





So, a long-ass time ago, Rose and Dave had a conversation like this:

TT: After you go, what do you think will happen to me?
TT: Will I just cease to exist?
TG: i dont know
TG: i mean your whole timeline will
TG: maybe
TT: Maybe?
TT: Is there a chance it’ll continue to exist, and I’ll just be here alone forever?
TT: I’m not sure which outcome is more unsettling.
TG: the thing with time travel is
TG: you cant overthink it
TG: just roll with it and see what happens
TG: and above all try not to do anything retarded
TT: What do you think I should do?
TG: try going to sleep
TG: our dream selves kind of operate outside the normal time continuum i think
TG: so if part of you from this timelines going to persist thats probably the way to make it happen
TT: Ok.
TG: and hey you might even be able to help your past dream self wake up sooner without all that fuss you went through
TT: I think the true purpose of this game is to see how many qualifiers we can get to precede the word “self” and still understand what we’re talking about.

This is the most important sentence in Homestuck.

I am dead serious.

Well, OK, I mean, it’s pretty important for understanding some major Homestuck themes and shit or something like that.

Also, I totally should have said: Pre-Retcon Doomed Timeline Non-Dreamself Rose but ultimately about to become Dreamself Rose who semi-merged with Pre-Retcon Alpha Timeline Rose and Doomed Timeline Dave aka Davesprite AKA future Davepetasprite^2 or as we all call them around the office, Davepeta, had that conversation.

Maybe you begin to see what I’m going to talk about here.

One of the major frustrations a lot of people had with the retcon was that the characters we ended up with at the end weren’t the ones we’d come to love and know throughout the story. Was it even worth it, to lose the characters we loved to the tyranny of Game Over? The victorious kids, with the exception of John and Roxy, were other people, with other histories, other goals, and other choices.

Allow me to submit that that may be the whole point.

SBURB is cruel. We’ve known that for a long time. It’s cruel not as Caliborn is cruel, but as the cosmos is cruel, as a supernova is cruel. It wants what it wants, and doesn’t care about how that intersects with the needs of humanity. It wants to make universes through a complex game-playing method, and drags hapless, vulnerable adolescents along for the ride. And most of the time it doesn’t even succeed, leaving its champions to rot in a doomed timeline or similar! Skaia’s victory is an amoral creation myth where individual human beings are just the carved pieces on the chessboard. (I mean, the other ones. Not the carapacians.)

Again, let’s consider the theme of VIDEO GAMES vs. REAL LIFE.

Homestuck, let’s be real, is basically some postmodern horror timey-wimey Jumanji. For a generation way more familiar with pixels than cute little tokens It’s easy for teenagers and in fact, basically everyone, to fantasize about escaping their life and slipping into some game world forever, where they get to do awesome things and be a heroic person.

Homestuck makes that literal. Congratulations, everything you ever knew is dead. You will never see it again, except your internet friends, who turn out also to be your family and other important people. I mean, from a distance, SBURB sounds like an awesome game, right? You figure out who you are and get to wear a cool costume displaying that identity. You get to make anything you want and enjoy this hyperflexible mythology tailored to YOUR CHOICES. HS fans talk all the time about how cool it would be to play a real version of SBURB. That’s a big part of the appeal of SBURB fan adventures. They put you and your friends in the story. Or your favorite characters! It sounds like a fantasy come true.

The thing is, as fantastical as it is, it’s also really fucked up, and ultimately you and your friends are being used. By a giant frog to let it have its babies. By the universe. By a smug blue cloud thing that doesn’t care about you at all.

SBURB does not care about you at all.

The funny thing, SBURB features a mythology with so many layers and nuances and seemingly human motifs about growth and self that you might search for some grand ultimate meaning behind it, but it’s not even human enough to have a personality, to be something you can argue with or fight. It just is. It’s all the cruelty and power of a god without any of the dazzling personality. It’s empty. It just wants to make universes all day long, or fail trying. It is a great, weird tadpole-making machine that eats children.

One of the big ways it doesn’t care about you is its attitude toward the self. Humans and trolls and whatnot prefer not to be relentlessly duplicated. SBURB says, oh yeah, let’s make tons of copies of the player characters and use them for a lot of different purposes.

There’s the dreamself, an essential bifurcation of identity (you are now and were always the dream moon princex) that sometimes gets merged into god tier but sometimes doesn’t. There’s doomed timeline selves, who exist ultimately to augment an Alpha timeline whose Alphaness is decided very arbitrarily and frequently by Lord English. There’s the you who exists before a scratched session and the you who exists afterward, who are two different people but started as one baby in an act of ectobaby meteor duplication, your player self and your guardian self. Dead timeline yous fill up the dreambubbles made by the horrorterrors and get endlessly confused with each other. Any one of these could be the you experience being at any given moment, and which one it is entirely arbitrary. Don’t like being Dead Nepeta #47? Tough hoofbeast leavings, kiddo.

To top it all off, in Terezi: Remember, we learn that every single time we thought someone changed from one self to another, was resurrected or something like that, it was another act of duplication. For every time someone’s died, there’s another version of them waiting in the Dream Bubbles, surprised that they’re not the main character anymore. And we have no way of knowing which is which. Even John, good old everyman John, may or may not be the person who died three or four times. It’s really impossible to say whether we’ve been following the same person throughout our story, or just the illusion of the same person, like a horrifying cosmic flipbook.

The retcon is a return to this same theme. Ultimately, there’s very little new in the changes John makes to reality except that they drive the point home.

John’s friends all died. John and his friends won the game. These things are both true at the same time, except those things may not have happened to the same people. There was a happy ending. Hooray! For, um, some folks who may or may not be the ones we care about. In fact, it’s very confusing, because from Rose’s perspective, Roxy is dead but came back to life, and from Roxy’s perspective Rose is dead but came back to life, except also she came back to life as a weird tentacle catgirl of pure id and self –indulgence. So there’s that. Um. Which Rose are we rooting for again?

Or wait: is it none of them, because the first Rose died in a doomed timeline, hundreds of panels and a number of years ago?

There’s a tension here which one experiences between saying it’s okay because it’s still the same people, and saying it’s not okay, because it’s not the same people at all. This tension is exactly what we’re meant to wrestle with. To put it another way, Homestuck asks if identity can work in aggregate. Are all Johns John, all Roses Rose, and do they all share in what they accomplish? Or are the final victors only accidents created by the whims and needs of the frog baby machine?

What I’m saying, basically, is that the retcon, in the sense that it pointed out our confused relationship with these characters, was already here.

In interviews and questions put to him over the years, Hussie constantly compares HS and SBURB to other video games, particularly Mario, which he frequently returns to as a baseline of comparison that most of his readers will know. One answer, from a recent Hiveswap interview, is particularly revelatory. To the question of “Why do you kill off all your characters?” Hussie replies:

[…]HS is supposedly a story that is also a game. In games, the characters die all the time. How many times did you let Mario fall in the pit before he saved the princess? Who weeps for these Marios. In games your characters die, but you keep trying and trying and rebooting and resetting until finally they make it. When you play a game this process is all very impersonal. Once you finally win, when all is said and done those deaths didn’t “count”, only the linear path of the final victorious version of the character is considered “real”. Mario never actually died, did he? Except the omniscient player knows better. HS seems to combine all the meaningless deaths of a trial-and-error game journey with the way death is treated dramatically in other media, where unlike our oblivious Mario, the characters are aware and afraid of the many deaths they must experience before finally winning the game.

The big man hass the answer.

Homestuck is the story of those dead Marios.

Other works, like Undertale, have engaged with this topic as well. But one of the major differences between Undertale and Homestuck is that in Undertale, between “lives,” one’s consciousness is preserved. In Homestuck, it’s discontinuous, and the value of the overall trial-error process is called into question by the fact that you, the player, may not even get to experience the victory. What meaning does victory hold if that is the case?

So, to put it in a nice thesis format:

One of the central themes of Homestuck is the challenge of reconciling an arbitrary and destructive pattern of growth and victory with the death and suffering you experienced along the way. Homestuck asks: is victory worthwhile if you’re not you anymore? And would you be able to know?

What even is the self? Is there such a thing?

If you were left feeling somewhat disconcerted by our heroes’ tidy victory and departure to their cosmic prize, or by how which Rose gets the spotlight is so deeply, deeply arbitrary, there’s a good reason for that. You’re supposed to be.

The philosophical problem of Wacky Cat Rose is insignificant next to the bullshit of SBURB.

And don’t forget—John and Roxy’s denizens helped them achieve the retcon. Ultimately, the victory they achieved was mediated by the same amoral system of SBURB, and was a victory over an enemy, Caliborn, whose power was created, perpetuated, and ended by that same system.

Okay, so here’s where it gets contentious. There’s an argument to be made, which I’m not sure how I feel about, that some of the character development that could have been in post-retcon Act 6 was left out precisely to push this feeling and play up this tension. Note that this is not the same thing as saying that they were deliberately badly written, but that they’re deliberately written to make us uneasy.That Hussie deliberately played with the balance between making these retconned characters feel familiar and making them feel eerily different to leave us feeling uneasy with the result.

I’m not sure I like that idea. It smacks a little too much of that “everything is perfect” thinking that comes sometimes from the far Metastuck camp. Some of the differences may also be the result of flawed writing. (See: Jane and Jake’s character arcs, which I might talk about later.) And I want to be able to critique those flaws. Ultimately, I think we still needed more time and development to figure out who these new people were—even if our goal was ultimately to compare them to their earlier selves. And again, more conscious acknowledgement of the problem from our heroes—especially John, the linchpin in this last and biggest act of duplication—might have helped drive this theme home.

Still, I think the Problem of Dead Marios is one of the most fundamental questions of Homestuck, maybe THE biggest question. It’s essential to understand it to understand what Hussie’s doing—or attempting to do— in the retcon and the ending.

I don’t know that Homestuck offers us a clear answer to that question. There are some confusions around the issue, too. Where do merged selves fit in, exactly? Clearly they’re a big part of the discussion, because Hussie spends some time in Act 6, especially near the end bringing the identity-merging powers of the Sprites to the forefront. (See also: the identity-merged nightmare that is Lord English.)  Can we even come up with a clear answer to what it means when a dead Mario returns to life grotesquely fused with Toad? How does he beat the game? Does he tell himself that the princess is in another castle? Or what if he merges with Peach? Are they their own princess? How do they know if they’re in the right castle?

Um. Anyway—

Interestingly, it’s not all grotesque—spritesplosions suggest that personalities that are too different don’t stay together long, so a fusion might rely on some inherent compatibility between the two players. Erisol’s self-loathing, sure, but also Fefeta’s cheerfulness. Davepeta seems to be a way of bringing out the best in their players, a way of getting Davesprite past his angst and Nepeta past her fear. Honestly, I know a lot of people don’t like Davepeta as the ending of these two characters’ arcs, but I can’t help but love it. They’re the ultimate coolkid. Cool enough to know they don’t have to be cool. Regular Dave got there, too, of course. But was his retcon assist from John ultimately any different?

Then, of course, we come to Davepeta’s speech to Jade in one of the last few updates before Collide. Davepeta suggests that there is such a thing as an ultimate self beyond the many different selves one piles up throughout the cosmos. A set of principles that describes who you are that’s larger than any individual instance of you. Your inherent Mariohood. (Maybe this is comparable to your Classpect identity, which attempts to describe who you are?) Davepeta even tells Jade, strikingly, that one might learn to see beyond the barriers between selves. Be the ur-self, in practice, rather than theory. This would be incredible news for Jade, who wrestles with the issue of different selves perhaps more than any other character. (There’s a lot to say about Jade.)

Honestly, I wish this ur-self idea had been developed more, and I honestly expected it to be. It doesn’t fully come to fruition, I feel. (Same goes for Davepeta’s character. Ohhhh, ZING!) I’m not sure it entirely makes philosophical sense, especially with fusion—I mean, doesn’t Davepeta themself disprove it? Or at least complicate it? Like, are they part of the ur-Dave or the ur-Nepeta? They seem to imply they’re BOTH? Does that even work? Does that mean that Marieach is all the Peaches and Marios at once?

(In fact, Bowser/Peach/Mario are but the three manifestations of one eternal principle. Also, Bowser/Peach are the true power couple. Read my fanfiction plz.)

And what, say, of Dirk, who ultimately ends up rejecting aspects of his other selves? It feels like there’s a lot more you could say here, and I wonder if Hussie would have said more, if he’d had time. What’s weird is, none of our victorious kids never reach an ur-self (though to their descendants, they become archetypal to some degree), which one might have expected. They’re just individual selves who happened to get lucky. Does that make them representative of the whole? It feels like something’s missing here, or like something got dropped at the last minute.

Same goes for the idea of the Ultimate Riddle. You’d be forgiven for missing it, but there’s been this riddle in the background lore of SBURB that seems to have something to do with personal agency in this overwhelming, overarching system. Karkat called it predestination, saying something like “ANY HOPE YOU HAD OF DOING THINGS OTHERWISE WAS JUST A RUSE.” But others have interpreted it more positively. My favorite interpretation, from bladekindeyewear: the answer to the Riddle is that YOU shape the timeline through your existence, personality, and choices, even when it looks like it’s all predestination. Ultimately it’s your predestination, your set of events, based deeply on your nature, that you are creating. Someone like Caliborn can use his innate personality to achieve power; someone like John might be able to use it to achieve freedom.

I definitely expected something like that to be expressed more explicitly. Like, a big ah-ha moment that helps John or Jade or whoever understand how to escape Caliborn’s system. Something like that would have been very helpful for a lot of our heroes, actually, who’ve been pushed around by Skaia and SBURB together, in finding a cathartic ending.  Once again, I wonder if something was dropped or rushed because there wasn’t time to put it all in. There’s places where you can see hints of that Answer being implied, maybe? But it’s kind of ambiguous.

You can see how the Answer to the Ultimate Riddle ties into some of Davepeta’s ideas. If your personality, the rules of your behavior are a fundamental archetype that goes beyond each individual self, then the answer to whether it matters if one self of yours makes it through to victory is an emphatic YES. You are all of those people, and by winning one round with Skaia, you’ve won the whole game, despite all the arbitrary challenges and deaths it heaps upon you along the way.

This may strike some as too positive for Skaia’s brutality, or again, some way of excusing flaws in many characters’ arcs, or unfair things that happen to them. To be fair, I don’t know that Davepeta’s necessarily meant to be taken as authoritative or the voice of Hussie. They may simply be offering a purrspective.

Hussie not choosing to come right out and engage with the Ultimate Riddle leaves the question of Dead Marios and what they mean for the victorious versions of our cast very open. I like that in some ways—let the reader decide—but I can’t help but wish we had more to work with in making that decision. Plus, it might have brought the thematic messages of Homestuck all the way home to tie them more closely to our characters and their experiences—character development being one of the things most people found most lacking in the ending.

NEXT TIME: All that wacky gnostic stuff probably

Monsta x ask game

💗- who is your bias in monsta x?
💖- who was your very first bias?
⭐️- why is your bias your bias?
💝- how long have you been a monsta x stan?
✨- why did you become a monsta x stan?
💭- what was your favorite era?
🎤- rapper line or vocal line?
👊🏽- hyung-line or maknae-line?
🤙🏽- monsta x or memesta x?
🎶- what’s your favorite title track monsta x song?
🎵- favorite non-title track song?
🗣- share an unpopular opinion about anything related to monsta x
💀- share your favorite meme
😏- fmk (pick 3 monsta x members)
🎥- favorite monsta x mv?
🏆- share your favorite monsta x moment
👨‍❤️‍👨- who do you ship in monsta x?
👬- favorite brotps?
❌- any notps?
👀- name one member who isn’t your bias but…
✏️- share your fics (if you have any)
📝- your favorite monsta x fics?
😫- have you ever seen monsta x live?
🌚-if monsta x was on a deserted island, who would be the first to go and why?
💫- if you could tell one member one thing, what would it be?
✍🏽- write a poem about monsta x
🌝- (person asking the question chooses scenario) who is most likely to…
🎨- make an edit/gifset/moodboard/etc of choice member
📢- say one thing you’ve been wanting to say about monsta x but haven’t
🚫- a fandom “joke” you thing is overused and disagree with
❓- did you watch no.mercy?
😂- favorite variety show monsta x has done?
🤷🏽‍♀️- All in or stuck?
🤷🏽‍♂️- rush or trespass?
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🙋🏽- hero kpop or hero Jpop?
🕺🏽- fave dance mv?
💃🏽- favorite choreography?
👽- favorite mv concept?

☺️- tag your favorite monsta x blog(s)

♋️- do you share a sign with anyone in monsta x?

👫- a quality you and your bias share?

🤝- are you the same age as anyone in monsta x?