Hey :) I love your account so much!😍 Thanks for doing this. I hope you learned enough for your exam! Good luck with it♥️ „The war is changing you. I can feel, see and hear you. But in the end you're not here, even when you‘re next to me.“ Draco+Harry
“The war is changing you. I can feel, see and hear you. But in the end you’re not here, even when you‘re next to me.” Draco took a deep breath, and willed the next words to come out. It was difficult to keep his voice from shaking, to keep himself from shaking. But he had to. Harry had given him this chance, and he’d be damned if he didn’t use it.
“That line always stuck with me. As I became more detached from everything going on around me, as I became so detached I didn’t recognise my body as my own anymore, this stayed clear in my mind.” Draco wrapped his fingers around the glass of water on the lectern and took a sip. Then he looked up, and faced the crowd of students again.
They had heard about the heroes and the bravery of it all during the many remembrance days and speeches, but never from his side. The wrong side.
No one had. It was only because Harry had recently started working at Hogwarts as Defence teacher, that he was standing there. He told himself it wasn’t because Harry just didn’t like giving speeches, but he wasn’t entirely sure if that wasn’t a lie. They’d only been dating for three months, he didn’t know how serious this was for the man.
“What Pansy Parkinson said to me that day stuck with me. ‘I am not here.’ Or rather, I am here, but no one needs me. The people who decide if I lived or died, didn’t care who I was. They needed a soldier who followed orders. A body to experiment or play with. If there was a terrified sixteen year old boy somewhere in there too, then that was hardly their problem.”
He let his grey eyes slide over the students, and knew without looking that he would meet no yawning faces. His story was not a brave one, but it also wasn’t boring, he knew that much. “They didn’t care. All those people whom I had idolized all my life, didn’t give a damn if I went to bed at night alone or in pain or with someone I never wanted there. I never questioned the authority of the people around me until I was in too deep. Until it had gotten real, and the only way to survive was to comply and detach.”
He let his drifting eyes settle on two green ones on the side of the stage. “I hid, hoping one day someone would come along and care about me again. An righteous equal who could make me see sense.”
The hall was dead silent as Draco reached the end of his speech. “Your teachers, parents and probably the ministry aren’t going to be happy with what I’m about to ask you. But I want, no, I need you all to listen to it anyway. And with you all being stubborn teenagers I don’t doubt that you will.”
The students laughed, relieved that the serious atmosphere had toned down a notch. Not that Draco’s next words weren’t serious though. “I ask you this. Question it. All of it. From the authority of your teachers and parents to the supposed facts you read in history books. Don’t just call their beliefs and viewpoints your own.”
He could see some of the older Ravenclaw students start to smile. They knew where he was getting at. “Ask yourself why, before you decide A is bad and B is good. Ask yourself if that is your own opinion, or if you copied it. Ask yourself if it makes sense. If there is no grey area. Think as an individual, not as part of a system that could very well be racist, homophobic, or will drag you into the wrong side of a war.”
He let his eyes linger on both the Slytherin and the Hufflepuff table, who were both prone to following others out of loyalty instead of logic. “Be very very sure that when you fuck up, you do so because you’re a bloody idiot with stupid, original ideas. Don’t do it because you’re a bloody idiot who never realised their ideas, opinions and beliefs came from someone else.”
He sighed. He was almost at the end now. One more cue card to go. “Use your time here to figure out who you are. What you think. Agree with someone because you genuinely think they’re right, not because you’re supposed to, or because you’re too lazy to think about it for yourself. And don’t just question yourself, question others too. Whack them over the head if you think they’re being a parrot.” Some of the Gryffindors laughed.
“It’s the only way to make sure this never happens again. Because a society that thinks as one, is much more easily fooled than a society that thinks as a couple thousand little shits who are not afraid to call out bullshit when they see it.”
The students broke out in laughter, and Draco smiled. It was always a good choice with kids to end on a swear. Relieved, he threw the last of his water back, and left the stage under an unexpected amount of applause. He hadn’t been in the centre of attention in a positive way since writing Weasley is our king. He rather liked it.
“That was brilliant.” Draco turned and was captured in a hug and a kiss before he could even register who’d spoken. Harry deepened the kiss and somewhere a couple students wolf whistled, reminding Harry of where he was.
He quickly let go and smiled at him from a safer distance. Behind his shoulder Draco could see Neville give him a thumbs up, and next to him even Granger send an approving smile his way.
Draco swallowed all of his sarcastic replies. Of course, I’m a natural. I’m always brilliant. Why so surprised? Instead, he just said, “Thank you. I just hope I got the message across.”
Harry ignoring his students again, pulled him back into a hug. “Pretty sure you did, love.” Draco almost shivered as Harry whispered in his ear. “Pretty sure you did.”
I hope this wasn’t too weird. It’s past midnight here now and I just really wanted to finish one more before going to bed.