what did i just do omfg

Fanon Lotor be like

i am not even sorry just take this

Yuri on Ice from Yakov’s perspective

Banquet:

 Yuri don’t let yourself get baited into a dance batt- I SAID DON’T GET BAITED INTO A DANCE BATTLE! GODDAMNIT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE MEETING SPONSERS!

Victor! Mila! Stop encouraging them! AND STOP TAKING PICTURES

Victor you’re not even drunk! STOP DANCING WITH THE SLOPPY DRUNK

Why is there a stripper pole in here? Why is this allowed to get out of hand? WHERE THE HELL ARE CHRIS AND THIS DRUNK’S COACHES?!?

Victor! DON’T LET DRUNKS HUMP YOU IN FRONT OF SPONSERS! NO, YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM! I DON’T CARE IF YOU THINK YOU’RE IN LOVE HE’S DRUNK AND YOU’RE AN IDIOT! I’LL TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS ROOM BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY MORE BAD DECISIONS.

- *sends Celestino a strongly worded email about keeping an eye on his pupils in the future the next morning*

Episode One

- Victor stop. Stop pining. You aren’t in love. No I don’t believe in love at first sight and I certainly don’t believe in love at first drunken humping. You’re right I’m not taking this seriously. He hasn’t contacted you because he was DRUNK OUT OF HIS MIND! Did you see how much booze he downed? It’s a wonder he didn’t die of alcohol poisoning. Just stfu and skate.

- Victor no. It’s not a message. Victor no! Don’t give up your career for an ill-advised booty call! UGH if I can’t stop you just make sure our Yuri doesn’t find out where you went.

Episode Two

- WHY ARE YOU IN JAPAN TOO YURI! I COULDN’T STOP VICTOR MAKING AN ILL-ADVISED BOOTY CALL BUT YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO BE ATTEMPTING THAT! YEAH SURE YOU’RE NOT THERE FOR THAT I’VE SEEN YOUR ROOM! …NO ONE HAS 30 POSTERS OF SOMEONE IN THEIR ROOM BECAUSE THEY ‘HATE THEM JUST SO MUCH’ YOU’RE FOOLING NO ONE KID!

Episode Three

- OMFG did you really give him a program about the night he got sloppy drunk and you turned into even a bigger moron? You’re going to put me into an early grave.

Episode Four

- MILA! STOP POKING THE SMOL ANGRY CHILD! HIS SCREECHING HURTS MY EARS!

- Wait, why the hell do I have to go live with my ex-wife and the angsty teen? I don’t want to have to listen to a list of my failures or a catalogue of all the ways Drunk Yuri is the worst especially as it tends to devolve into ‘stupid pig, how dare he be so good looking’.

Episode Five

- Victor stop trying to pretend this isn’t an elaborate booty call. This is not how coaching works.

Episode Six

- I have the living legend who gave it all up to be a pretend coach in order to get with a sloppy drunk, a sadist of a female skater who stirs up trouble on purpose, an angsty teen who can’t tell the difference between having a crush and hating someone and an emo skater who is far too old to be as emo as he is. Kill me now.

Episode Seven

- Maybe I was giving Victor a disservice. His student is actually doing quite well and maybe they are taking it seriously and HOLY FUCK NEVERMIND JUST KISS YOUR STUDENT IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD VICTOR YOU ASSHAT

Episode Eight

- Yuri has calmed down and I’m just going to ignore Victor. Yep that’ll work OMFG did you HAVE TO KISS HIS FUCKING SKATE?!? THIS IS WHY YOU WEREN’T ALLOWED TO TAKE HIM BACK TO THE HOTEL ROOM! YOU HAVE NO CHILL!

You want me to what? Be his coach? Well…only because I like Maccachin.

Episode Nine

- You’re alright actually, I hereby allow you the name Japanese Yuri instead of Drunk Yuri. You may be the only sane person I know surprisingly. I still am going to tell you off for fucking up though.

- ….I take it all back. WTF was up with all the hugging.

Episode Ten

- …They got engaged. Victor really is going to marry him….I’m not even surprised at this point. Fine. Keep him Japanese Yuri. He’s a pain in the ass anyway.

Episode Eleven

-  YES! I AM A PROUD DAD/COACH! HAPPIEST I’VE BEEN THIS WHOLE YEAR

Episode Twelve

- WTF? You’re coming back now? Idek what’s going on anymore.

- Well done Yuri! I’m so proud of you for winning gold!

- …They are doing a super romantic pairs skate because of course they are.

- Okay so Victor is coming back to Russia to train cool….wait what do you mean you’re still going to coach Japanese Yuri? WTF? HOW WOULD THAT EVEN WORK? WTF NO.

Post Episode Twelve

- STOP FLIRTING IN THE RINK! WHY GOD WHY AM I BEING PUNISHED?

- STOP GROPING HIM VICTOR THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT

-  YURI P STOP THROWING THINGS EVERY TIME THEY FLIRT

-  I HATE ALL OF MY CHILDREN SO MUCH.

- YOU’RE ALL THE REASON I HAVE NO HAIR

Pray for Yakov

2

Old art of my OC and friends OCs for an old RP group several years back lmao. They were part of an “All Boys Sports Academy.” My oc is the one in the purple jacket name Sen and he did kick-boxing and he was also the one who wore the school mascot costume during sports games lmao.

Criminal AUs
  • “The police just threatened you to put your weapon down and you retorted by saying that you’ll take something extremely valuable, and then you grabbed me wTF DID YOU JUST WINK AT ME.”
  • “Y'know, I wouldn’t be so mad about this whole ‘I was secretly a criminal the whole time thing’ if you hadn’t just killed our professor, I mean c'mon dude I know he was a douche to me but that’s no excuse to just MuRDer SOMEONE.”
  • “Okay, I’m sorry, but I CLEARLY got here first.”
  • “You got thrown into prison because you were covering for a relative/your friend and it’s so obvious you don’t fit in here and it’s actually pathetic, so how about I (someone who’s been in here for ages) show you the ropes?”
  • “Pfft, you’re the newbie and you look like such a wuss it’s unreal, I bet you couldn’t handle a single punc — WOAH I WAS NOT EXPECTING YOU TO PUNCH THAT HARD… okay, but you’ve GOT to teach me how to do that and I might be oddly attracted to you?? whaaaat???”
  • “I caught you in the middle of robbing this store and I’m so reporting this, and NO  i will not be bribed; OMG WHAT THEY HAVE THIS I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS FOR AGES… okay, maybe I will. “
  • “okay, I know I’m a security guard and I’m not meant to talk to any of the prisoners but seriously you are just so chatty and lovable it’s kind of hard not to talk to you, how did you even get in here???” 
  • “I’m only talking to you, the security guard, because I have a plan to get out of here but I think i kinda like you a bit more (ok a lot more) than the other guards, holy shit I might not leave because of you.”
  • BONUS: “What do you mean you want me to come with you??”
  • “Hey, you know all the expensive things you’ve been getting me the past few months? How did you even manage to afford that? … omfg please tell me you’re joking — YOU’RE NOT JOKING WHAT THE HELL.”
  • “you take the term ‘partner in crime’ to a whole new level.” 

anonymous asked:

alright, i gotta know just how embarrassed everyone is if MC catches them indulging in a little self-pleasure~

lmAO WHY DID 404 LEAVE ME WITH ANY NSFW I’M SO BAD WITH IT BUT HERE YA GO NONNIE ~ Admin 626

*NSFW

*YOOSUNG
- omfg when you walk in, he’s so embarrassed!!!!
- hE CANT COMPOSE HIMSELF HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO
- his face is all red  and he’s try to pull his pants up and hE’S KNOCKING EVERYTHING OVER
- you’re just kinda standing there like “it’s totally normal for humans to do this??? It’s totally cool dude”
- but then you glance over at his phone and you figure out why he’s probably freaking out
- hE WAS LOOKING AT A PICTURE OF YOU??? WHAT
- MC why are you surprised you’re his significant other???
- bruh now you’re extremely embarrassed
- you’re both these cute little blushing balls (sounds kinda dirty)
- you compose yourself though and say “why do you need to look at a picture of me when you have the real thing right here?”
- yOOSUNG IS DEAD, FLATLINE, HE CAN’T COME BACK FROM THAT
- you give him a little wink before you saunter over to him
- you know how this ends ;;)))
 
*JAEHEE
- you and Jaehee have very clashing schedules, so you’re usually super lucky to have two weeks a night to yourselves???
- so it was kinda normal for her to indulge in a bit of self pleasure without u jaehee aint waiting for nobody on this sex train
- but when you come home because your boss gave the day off???
- oh god she’s so horrified
- you already knew she did this but to be caught in the middle of it???
- but nobody can stop Jaehee when she’s turned on
- so on the inside while she’s mortified, she looks so calm and collected on the outside
- “Oh, you’re finally home, MC, I’ve been waiting for you~”
- and oh my god you’re so embarrassed and you just start blushing right away
- She slips her shirt off and you just kEEP STARING
- You can’t move she’s too hot she’s gonna kill you
- omFG IS SHE GIVING YOU A STRIP TEASE???
- You almost pass out, this is gonna be a very good night
 
*ZEN
- okay well we know how noble and overdramatic this boy is
- so when you catch him, he’s not only really embarrassed
- he is terribly disgusted with himself???
- hE LITERALLY GETS ON HIS KNEES AND BEGS FOR FORGIVENESS FROM YOU
-It’s okay honey 626 will forgive u if u cut ur rat tail off
- and while he’s apologizing, you’re kinda thinking “wow he looks really good on his knees? It’s kinda hot???”
- “Hey Zen, take my pants off”
- “..what?”
- “If you’re going to apologize, I’d prefer you do it with your tongue”
- Dom MC gives me life ;;)))
 
*JUMIN
- honestly this is no biggie for him
- like you walk in on him and he just stares at you expectantly
- “I’m not gonna stop, you can either join or leave”
- “I’d prefer if you got on your knees tho” wiNK WONK
- it’s a start to a very hot night tho ;)))
 
*SAEYOUNG
- he’s insanely embarrassed but he’s gonna try to be smooth like jumin
- he doesn’t want you to realize how embarrassed he actually is
- He gives you the Flynn Rider smolder
- “You’re going to help me, MC”
- you just kinda stare at him like ??? bruh you am tired u do nOT HAVE THE TIME
- “Nah I’m gonna leave bye”
- “mC I’M SORRY I DIDN’T MEAN IT”
 
*SAERAN
- omfg you thought Yoosung was embarrassed??? Saeran’s reaction makes Yoosung look like a Daddy
- his whole face turns red
- he’s still trying to find himself sexually and he doesn’t want you to judge him???
- you just quietly put down the cookies you baked for him and say “Hey, it’s okay, I’m definitely not gonna judge, I do it too”
- you don’t want him to feel bad about it and you definitely don’t want him to feel pressured <3
- you totally don’t think about him later that night, nope, didn’t happen
 
*V
- you would think that V of all people would be embarrassed, like he’d probably pull a Zen and get on in his knees for forgiveness
- but nah
- nOT TODAY
- he’s much more smooth than you would think
- “would you like to join, MC?”
- yOU’RE SO EMBARRASSED
- you’re just stuttering and blushing and you trIP
- this anime boi picks u up princess style and carries u to ur bed
- aNOTHER HOT NIGHT WOW UR ON FIRE MC

A Date With Markiplier

So I’m sure most of you are aware of @markiplier ’s most recent video which is a choose your own adventure-esc story. I’m completely in love with the idea and how it was executed. Team Markiplier did a fanastic job with it and i was movitaved enough to do this! i spent 10 hours making these cute little gifs and the lack of sleep was worth it. (Thanks for the motivation to get my ass in gear once more :) )

So here we go on the adventure that is a Date With Markiplier:

Warning! THERE ARE SPOILERS! these are all of the 10 endings and so if you haven’t gotten them I may spoil it for you! First Ending: Meta 

AKA, Mark being a huge dick 


Second Ending: I Had So Much Planned

AKA, use wheelies to escape your feelies


Third Ending: Vanilla 

this one was the first one i did, and i was just going to do this and Chocolate but i got carried away…

AKA, Pure Vanilla Bean 

Fourth Ending: Chocolate

This was supposed to look more menacing than it actually does. Oh Whale 

AKA, OMFG DARKI IS BACK!!1!!

Fifth & Sixth Endings: Peanut Butter Blues & Tuna Triumph

These are some of my favorites because they are so random and they remind me of the history lesson videos 

AKA, What. The. Actual. Shit. Just. Happened.

Seventh Ending: Alien Abduction

AKA, the newest MIB movie looks great!

Eighth Ending: The Big Dig???

I believe that this is the eighth ending??? Please Correct me if I’m wrong

AKA, I just watched a full grown man scrape the floor with a spoon for ten minutes

Ninth Ending: Mark Ded AF

AKA, this is why you never split up 

and finally, the Tenth Ending: True Ending

AKA, The Return Of Wilford Warfstache

Sorry for the long-ass post, but i hope you like the fruits of my efforts. I am a beginner in digital art and I know its not perfect, but that’s why i posted it. :)

Yoongi as your boyfriend:
  • Waking up in the morning would b-oh wait, sorry, there’s no waking up in the morning
  • If you woke up early he would pull you back into bed and hold you in his arms until you went back to sleep
  • If you ask him to let you go he’s just going to let out little groans and whimpers and they’ll be so cute sjbdjkewbjrwe
  • When you finally wake up, he’s going to watch you stretch and sigh at your beauty
  • Then he’ll lean down and plant a soft kiss of the corner of your mouth
  • KILL ME
  • Oh man, he’ll try and make you lunch by himself
  • TRY
  • But he’ll most likely end up calling Jin on the phone and asking for instructions
  • And pretend that he made it all by himself
  • “Woah! This is delicious! How did you make it?”
  • “Min Suga. Genius”
  • If you were having trouble picking out clothes he would help you because he has all the swag
  • But he really wouldn’t care what you wore
  • Because you’re so perfect to him <3
  • You would have to be very patient with him because he’ll be working on music all day
  • And when you try to make him eat he’ll try to refuse
  • “Let me finish one more line…”
  • “Yoongi, please, you skipped all your meals today.”
  • And with that, he would finish everything you made for him
  • His hugs would be the best because they reminded you of home, all warm and inviting
  • And also, he probably smells soooooo attractive
  • When you got sad, deep down he would really want to help you
  • But it’s really hard for him to show you that he’s trying
  • So he would just sit there and listen to you, nodding his head in understanding
  • And if you needed it, he would pull you into a hug and hold you there until you calmed down
  • When he thinks he made a good song, you would be the first to hear it
  • He would look at you with expectant eyes, waiting for criticism
  • But of course you loved the song
  • And his smile would grow all bright, gummy
  • If you ever cussed, he would smile and raise his eyebrows
  • “That was hot”
  • WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF, WHAT THE FCK
  • If you ever had a problem, he’s the first person you go to because he will give you honest, useful advice
  • He’s gonna try to get you to dye your hair the same color as his omfg .-.
  • But he’ll deny that he ever did it if anyone asks him
  • In front of the members, he’s not going to try to make others jealous and he’s also not going to be protective
  • He’d just want you to have a good time and hang out like friends
  • There will be days where he comes home at like 5 a.m. completely drained and exhausted
  • These might be the nights where he spills all his pent up emotions and tells you how much he cherishes you
  • And loves you so much that he never wants to spend a single moment without you
  • And he’s going to hold you so tight that you almost can’t breathe
  • But you’d never want to be anywhere but in his arms

Originally posted by bwiseoks

Do you remember us?

-Admin C

anonymous asked:

Hey hey ♡ I have a little request for you since I fell in love with your writings. How would the RFA, Searan and V react if fem!MC would call them "master" ? I'd love a NSFW version :)

okay so the context for this is basically MC works at a maid cafe and ‘accidentally’ says that to them 

also NSFW lmao i can try but- y’all know i’m bad at sin xD


Yoosung:

  • he walked through the door expecting the more than normal “hello” from MC but
  • instead it was “Good day, Master~”
  • one of those big anime “EHHHH?!” things
  • he can’t even form words like omfg what the heck just happened? 
  • he immediately starts blushing because he’s really turned on and he just covers his mouth in embarrassment 
  • Knees weak and slightly shaking he makes his way over to MC and just literally f a l l s into her arms cuz he’s so. damn. lightheaded from MC’s simple, less than provocative words
  • “M-MC.. please give me a heads up before you do something like that, my heart can’t go from doki doki to heart ATTACK.”
  • MC: ??? did i do something do i need to call ambulance

Zen:

  • He just came back from a run
  • Nice and sweaty… steamin’ hot, really.
  • Anyway he’s like taking a sip from his water bottle when he opens the door 
  • “Welcome, Master!”
  • he just cHOKES 
  • he’s over there like coughing cuz water almost got into his lungs all the while MC is still pouncing around in her fricken (work) clothes
    • which is hella kawaii btw 
  • and he’s feeling it man
  • it’s now or never 
  • so he promptly recovers from his coughing fit and picks up MC bridal style 
  • “EW you’re getting my costume all sweaty and gross”
  • “How can you say that to your “Master”?“
  • *MC’s face turns flush red when she realizes what her slip up has now caused
  • weoo not complaining for what’s to happen next though ;))

Jaehee:

  • I thought we promised to keep it PG 
  • but not today honey, not today
  • Jaehee was working (the usual) 
  • MC brought in some coffee so she could stay alive awake
  • and as she sets down the cup, MC just asks as if it were natural
  • “Master, would you like me to draw a cat on top of your latte?”
  • The only thing Jaehee could see atm was MC in a freaking a kitty lingerie outfit
  • she’d never liked cats more before
  • snapping back into reality she saw MC’s face staring at her dumbfounded
  • cuz she ain’t a perv like u baehee 
  • And she gives Jaehee a peck on the lips before she gets pulled under by Jaehee’s naughty, naughty thoughts

Jumin:

  • it was Sunday morning and he was playing with Elly as usual
  • MC was in the kitchen making some kitty shaped pancakes for the two of them but what Jumin didn’t know was that MC dressed up as a maid for the fun of it (since he never got to see her in it)
  • “Master~ breakfast is served” she announced as she left the kitchen looking SUPER ADORABLE in her outfit 
  • Jumin just stares at her and a sly smile begins to form on his lips
  • “Did you wear that for me?”
  • MC gives him a little wink and
  • He snickers a little and leaves Elly to play alone
  • *kabedon MC against the wall*
  • you can choose a pose (but tbh i think pose #4 is just perfect)
  • “would i get in trouble for ripping this?” he says has he tugs roughly at her skirt

707:

  • so he was just playing on his computer and suddenly MC just spins his chair around
  • his eyes widen at the sight of her in a maid outfit
  • “How do I look, Master?”
  • then he starts getting r e a l e x c i t e d
  • REAL EXCITED FOR:
  • to MC’s dismay, he decides to hold a maid outfit challenge
  • and they literally have to Skype call all of the RFA to get votes
  • also did i mention Zen voted for Seven lmfao
  • sorry MC, no sexy time for you - Seven’s just… being Seven

Saeran:

  • He was just tryna get some new socks okay
  • little cinnamon bun innocent as hell but
  • he accidentally walked in on MC changing out of her work clothes
  • “M-MC?”
  • unconsciously she answers “Yes, master?”
  • whoop 
  • there he goes, red as a tomato
  • “M-master?”
  • MC looks at him kinda confused like why is he so red-
  • ohhhh
  • OHHHHH
  • so she decides to play with this cute bby a little more
  • she leans in real close man so close he can feel her hot breath on his neck
  • “Or should I say… my saviour?”
  • RIGHT ON THE MONEY THE BEAST HAS BEEN RELEASED

V:

  • MC just came back from work and he can’t see her outfit because he’s freaking blind ok
  • but he can smell her perfume
  • “MC, you’re home!”
  • he walks over to give her a hug
  • “Yes, Master~”
  • he kinda stiffens like 
  • what did she just say?
  • MC goes in for a tight hug and he can feel all the frilly fabric 
  • and his breath hitches a bit because she smells like cotton candy and 
  • he’s suddenly a little choked man he’s gotta loosen the non-existent tie around his neck to calm the f down
  • and he like clears his throat a little
  • BUT THEN MC goes in for a kiss and he just cannot anymore 
  • “MC let’s go to the room to finish this”

LOL i wanted to add pics cuz it’s more fun lmao 

also sorry this is very SFW

~Cherry L.


Masterpost: click here

Askbox/Requests: click here

anonymous asked:

I love the idea of a friendship growing between MC and Jaehee at first because they're both the only girls and, like, sometimes you just gotta talk smack about the boys with another girl, but then it blossoms into this really good and deep friendship and I was wondering if you could maybe show how that friendship would manifest with MC's different relationships with the RFA boys and V?

A/N: THIS IS SUCH A GOOD IDEA AND I LOVE IT SO VERY MUCH BECAUSE I FEEL IT ON A SPIRITUAL LEVEL I WANT JAEHEE AS A BESTIE IN EVERY ROUTE (also i kind of made this how they all reacted to the friendship i hope you dont mind) ~Admin 404

*YOOSUNG:

           - I don’t think it’d affect him that much

           -Like yyeess MC I’m so happy you got best friend!!!!

           -Does get a little jealous of her though

           -“MC!!! Wanna come play some LOLOL with me???” “Nah, me and Jaehee are going to go shopping!” “But…the two of you hung out all day yesterday?” “Yeah, and we’re gonna do it again! I’ll text you later!”

           -HE WANTS SOME MC TIME TOO *angry eyebrows*

           -As long as you make time for him, he’s a-okay!

           -But pls tell him secrets too MC he wants to be your other best friend

           -Also lowkey worried because??? What do the two of you talk about?

           -He remembered some of the things his sister and her friends used to talk about and he was nOT EXCITED

           -DID YOU TALK ABOUT HIM??? WAS IT GOOD THINGS??? OH GOD MC PLEASE TELL ME. WAIT NEVERMIND DON’T TELL ME I DONT WANT TO KNOW. WAIT YES I DO. WAIT NO. AAAAAAAAAAA

*ZEN:

           -*Slides into the living room and seductively throws himself over the side of the couch*

           -“Where the two of you talking about me?”

           - yeah talking about how you’re a total fucking DORK

           -He’s good friends with Jaehee too!! Why won’t you let him in the room for talk time ;A;

           -Tried sneaking into the room to listen but the two of you are smarter than that and have to physically throw him out of the room

           -He’s happy that you’re such good friends with her, though!!!

           -Since he’s her friend as well, he knows how badly she needed a friend for some girl talk

           -But?? Still?? He waNTS TO KNOW

           -MC WHAT DO YOU SAY ABOUT ME TO YOUR FRIENDS AAAAAAAA

           - honestly pouts and sits outside of the door sometimes when the two of you throw him out, blows up your phone until you yell through the door

*JUMIN:

           -This….is so weird

           -Why is Assistant Kang in his house

           -Tries to hand her work almost every single time

           -Until you kind of knock it out of his hand and it falls to the floor

           -?????? MC????? It’s her job??????

           -“She is here as my GUEST Jumin, YOU do that work”

           -G A S P MC WHAT

           -Overall he’s just so…..awkward when you and Jaehee hang out at home. Otherwise, he could care less if the two of you were close friends. He loves that you have a close friend to talk with! He also doesn’t care if the two of you talk about him, whatever

           -Like how is he supposed to act??? He’s almost two different people. He’s so laid back at home with you and all business when he’s at work with Jaehee. WhaT IS HE SUPPOSED TO DO ;A;

           - locks himself in his office when she’s over to avoid the awkwardness

*SAEYOUNG:

           -*dresses up as a girl*

           -*slides into the room to join the girl talk*

           -*is promptly kicked out by the two of you*

           -The only person he had like that in his life was his brother

           -But they’ve been apart for so long, and with everything that happened….

           -He tries to have that kind of friendship now and Saeran just kind of walks out of the room

           -So!!!! He’s happy for you!!! But also very jealous (though he hides it)

           -You can tell how upset he gets sometimes, and you and Jaehee agree to let him hang out every now and then to make him happy

           - only if he dresses up like a girl

           -When the two of you don’t let him in, he just turns on the CCTV because??? He wants the juicy gossip on all of the members too??? BAD SAEYOUNG

*V:

           -Completely respects your privacy

           -Please, MC, you and Jaehee spend all the time you would like together

           -Talk about whatever you would like

           -Your laughter is muSIC TO HIS EARS

           -HE HAS TO STOP HIMSELF FROM RUNNING IN WITH HIS CAMERA TO CAPTURE THE BEAUTIFUL, WARM MOMENTS BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU

           -He couldn’t care less what the two of you talked about

           -Knows that if you want to share with him, you will

           -Plus, Jaehee isn’t really a loud, rowdy person well most of the time

           -So!! She can stay all she wants!!! It doesn’t break the nice relaxed feeling of the house and he appreciates that

           -He even makes the two of you tea and some snacks every now and then!!! hes like a mum omfg

*SAERAN:

           -What do you mean you’re going out

           -What do you mean I can’t come in and sit in the living room

           -whAT DO YOU MEAN BY GIRL TIME WHAT THE FUCK IS GIRL TIME

           -MC WHAT DID I DO WRONG ARE YOU MAD AT ME??

           - someone please help him he doesn’t understand how this all works

           -Constant reassuring that you’re just going to hang out with Jaehee!! You aren’t mad!!

           -There’s just some things you have to talk about with a girl friend, ya know??

           -If you bring up even a slightly awkward topic he gets flustered and immediately agrees to leave the two of you alone

           -A lot of the time though, Jaehee doesn’t mind if he’s there? He’s actually pretty quiet and uninterested

           -He just likes to talk shit about Saeyoung let him into the conversation every now and then plEASE he needs to get it out

we have two cats and they absolutely despise each other, so just now I came upstairs to THIS, and I snapped a picture as evidence for the rest of the fam because these two have always been MORTAL ENEMIES so I’m like omg did they bury the hatchet after 12 years? what happened?

AND THEN I DIED A LITTLE BECAUSE IT WAS FOLLOWED IMMEDIATELY BY THIS

“WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, HUMAN?! WE DON’T OWE YOU ANY EXPLANATION, WE DO AS WE PLEASE!” 

I’m yelling

scarlet99  asked:

KiC Viktor gets really clumsy around Yuuri but the worst had to be when the Sheer Shirt and The Jeans combo ~appears~... Viktor.exe stopped working. Viktor accidentally spills water all over Yuuri. It's simultaneously the worst and best thing that has ever happened to him. Bonus: Oh no! Yuuri had to take his shirt off so it can dry properly! *Slicks hair back* Eros mode activated. RIP Viktor.

Yuuri stares in horror as the water soaks his shirt and makes the translucent fabric stick to his skin. 

“Oh my god,” Victor says, eyes widening. He sets his now-empty glass down on his table. “Yuuri, I’m so sor–” 

“It’s okay,” Yuuri answers quickly. He really doesn’t want to hear that Victor Nikiforov’s immediate reaction upon being exposed to his body is an apology. “I’ll just–”

“Let me–” 

“I, um–” 

“Yuuri,” Victor says, touching his arm. They’re both breathless, for some reason; they’re both freaking out. Even though it’s water. 

It’s water. Water tends to dry, Yuuri recognizes. 

Still. 

“Let’s take you to the closet, yeah?” Victor says, and he slips a hand through the crook of Yuuri’s elbow and tugs him to the hallway. 

When they arrive at HMC’s massive closet, the Accessories staff there pretend to avert their eyes as Victor leads Yuuri to a rack of shirts. He lets go of Yuuri’s arm to rifle through the hangers, muttering to himself. He picks one, finally, and turns to Yuuri. “Here, I think this will–” He stops, jaw slackening. “You’re shirtless.” 

Yuuri feels his cheeks heat up. “I figured I’d hang up my shirt and let it, uh.” He coughs and waves the hanger in his hand. “Let it dry, right?” 

“You’re…” Victor blinks and shakes his head, never finishes his sentence.

[HMCOUTURE SLACK CHANNEL: #interns_random]

allisonm: you guys. victor and yuuri. the closet. it’s happening.
jennaj: this is not a drill people it is ~happening~
aaronp: omfg what?? they kissed?? @alext you owe me $5 
jennaj: no no no they’re just flirting super obviously
aaronp: …oh
aaronp: they do that all the time wtf come back when something substantial is happening 
alext: ha! see? i still say it’s not going to happen at least for another 3 months
allisonm: RIP ice king victor and little duckling yuuri 

anonymous asked:

hi, can i request a deliveryboy!au with hoshi? :)

- hoshi is the delivery boy for this fried chicken restaurant called KOKO’S
- he took it because he really needed a job but also because he found out that employees get a 50% discount and he was like SIGN ME UP
- he uses the restaurant’s scooter to make deliveries, and he’s so fast?? he always makes it to his destination on time
- he wears this helmet with the restaurant’s logo on it and when he takes it off his hair is all messy and it’s cute
- everyone in the restaurant loves him. chef seokmin always gives him some fried chicken to take home after his shift, the regular customers always cheer for him to dance, and owner seungcheol’s always telling him he’s doing great
- he loves it there because they’re just like family
- one night, KOKO’S is ready to close in about thirty mins when all of a sudden the restaurant gets a phone call
- seungcheol picks it up and after scribbling down a few things, he hangs up and tells hoshi that he has one more delivery to make
- “after this, just drop off the scooter and the debit machine and you can go home. this’ll be your last delivery of the day.”
- hoshi nods his head and waits around for the chicken to be fried, and when it is, he’s on his way
- he goes outside and places the chicken on the back of his scooter and drives off into the night. once he finds the apartment, he parks his scooter out front and walks up the stairs to get to the person’s room
- now there’s you
- you’re walking home alone after buying some snacks and drinks from the convenience store and you’re getting a little paranoid because it’s late and dark out
- you turn your head around every time you hear a sound and you walk a little faster
- all of a sudden, this cat shrieks which scares you and you trip over your own feet
- only to fall over a scooter parked outside an apartment
- the scooter falls with a crash and you realize that the side mirror on the right is cracked and the side mirror on the left fell off and you’re like oh. no.
- while you’re trying to make the scooter stand again, someone suddenly yells “HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY SCOOTER??” and you let go of the scooter out of surprise and it falls with a crash AGAIN
- you look up with a scared expression on your face to see this boy running up to you
- you say “i’m so sorry!!! there was this cat and i got scared and—”
- the boy takes his helmet off and you’re like……. omg he’s cute……
- BUT NOT THE POINT YOU HAVE TO APOLOGIZE
- while you’re apologizing, the boy just makes the scooter stand and dramatically falls to his knees at the sight of the broken mirrors and the scratches
- he shakily takes out his keys and tries to turn it on but…… nothing….. the engine roars for a few seconds before just dying
- it was an old scooter already so the two crashes were enough to make it meet its end
- you take out your wallet and tell him “i’ll pay for the damages!!! how much do you need???” and the boy just says “…..it’s not mine….. it belongs to this restaurant i work for….”
- and you gasp because omfg you’re going to get this boy FIRED
- you know you’ll never be able to live with that guilt so you tell him “i’ll go to the restaurant with you. i’ll tell them everything.”
- and he looks up and you continue “i mean….. it’s my fault anyway, i don’t think i’d be able to live if you took the blame for what i did”
- but the boy is too kind and says “don’t worry about it. i’ll manage. it’s my fault for not parking in a safer location…….. thanks anyway”
- he flashes you a little smile and walks away while rolling his scooter and you can’t help but feel so bad…
- you start walking in the direction of home but you keep stopping in your tracks because the guilt is eating you up alive
- you sigh and turn around and quietly follow the boy who’s thankfully still in sight
- after a few mins of walking, you see him park his scooter out front before entering a restaurant called KOKO’S and you know about it because your friend loves their chicken
- as you approach the restaurant, you look through the windows and you could see the boy looking down while who you’re guessing is the owner scolds him and you know it’s because of the scooter
- before the situation could get any worse, you swing the restaurant’s door open and rush inside, making the two boys turn to you
- the owner politely tells you that they’re closed while the boy just looks at you with a shocked expression on his face
- you walk up to the owner and say “i…. i was the one who broke the scooter”
- and you explain everything and you think they’re going to be understanding of this whole situation
- but no
- before you know it, both you and the boy are getting scolded by them and he asks “what’s your name?” and after you tell him, he says “you’re going to be working for me until you could help hoshi buy a new scooter.”
- your jaw falls and hoshi just nods his head because there’s no arguing with him
- he continues “without the scooter, deliveries will take longer with only one person. so you’ll be helping him make deliveries.”
- after giving your info, you and hoshi exit the restaurant together and he says “hey…. why did you come by? i told you i was going to be fine”
- and you say “oh no i just couldn’t just let you get in trouble all by yourself you know…….”
- hoshi grins at your kindness and says “well since we’re going to be working together from now on, it’s nice to meet you!! my name’s actually soonyoung, but everyone calls me hoshi”
- you say “it’s nice to meet you too. i’m (name)!!”
- hoshi is a gentleman so he walks you home and when you enter your apartment, you just collapse on your bed and just stare at the ceiling like…… did that really happen…….
- yes it did
- because the next day, you wake up to the sound of your ringtone which is “replay” by shinee
- you pick up and it’s seungcheol who asks “where are you?? your shift is starting in fifteen mins” and you look at the time like oooh my goSH AM I REALLY GOING TO BE LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY ON THE JOB
- you tell him “oh i’m on my way there!! just went to get a quick breakfast…… ahahah…….”
- you get ready in like five mins and then sprint all the way there but you know what, you make it in time good job
- hoshi’s already there, picking up the delivery bags from the kitchen and he gives you one bag while he carries the two others
- seungcheol tells you guys “okay so here’s the address for this order. come right back because you having another one on its way!”
- you and hoshi exit the restaurant and it’s quiet while you’re both walking, when your phone goes off and you pick it up to see that it’s a friend of yours asking if you wanted to hang out
- after telling them you’re busy, you hang up and hoshi screams “YOU LISTEN TO SHINEE????” and your eyes light up like “YEAH!!! YOU DO TOO???”
- and you both bond over shinee and talk about your favorite songs
- you guys surprisingly make it to your destination on time and you notice just how kind and polite hoshi is to the customer
- after getting the payment for the chicken, you and hoshi rush back to the restaurant for the next order
- and it’s like that for the rest of the day and the next few days after that
- you and hoshi become really good friends and before you know it, you’re having so much fun with hoshi
- after long days, seokmin makes fried chicken for you guys and you both happily eat it
- seungcheol notices how much happier hoshi seems
- it’s hard to see because he’s always smiling but…… to him, it’s plain as day
- of course this doesn’t last forever because you and hoshi eventually get enough money to buy a new scooter and well….. you’re not needed anymore
- seokmin makes you and hoshi one last meal to eat together and while you both spend it happily….. there’s a certain sadness in his eyes……. you’re not sure why……
- hoshi decides to walk you home and once you both make it there, he says “so uhh…. it was nice working with you….”
- you say “it was nice working with you too….. you made it fun!!” and he tells you “you made it fun too!! just….. if you….. want any chicken, you know where to go. we’ll be happy to see you again”
- you nod your head and say good night before shutting the door
- the next morning, you wake up and realize that you don’t need to go to work
- you should be feeling happy but instead you feel so empty…..
- at the same time, hoshi wakes up and smiles on his way to work, ready for another fun day with you when he realizes
- you don’t work there anymore
- seungcheol notices how much hoshi is sulking and even the regular customers don’t like seeing him this way, he’s usually always smiling and filling their days with sunshine
- about a week passes without you two seeing each other, and hoshi makes it really obvious that he misses you
- seokmin tells him “hoshi just confess to them” but hoshi’s like “what??? nooo i can’t??? what if they don’t like me back???? i’ll never be able to see them ever AGAIN”
- seungcheol pats his head and says “ok hoshi, i know you miss (name), but you still have some work to do” he hands him a little piece of paper with an address written on it
- he tells him “don’t be late. oh and give this to the customer too.” he gives him a tiny little envelope and sends hoshi on his way
- hoshi rides the new scooter there and rings the doorbell before suddenly freezing
- because he knows this apartment…… it’s—
- you open the door and jump in surprise to see hoshi standing by your door
- you say “hoshi??? what are you doing here???” and he says “what do you mean??? i’m here for your order” and you’re like “…..but i didn’t order anything…..”
- hoshi’s like HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME
- he then takes out the little envelope and hands it to you “seungcheol said this is for you, maybe it has some answer on it??”
- you take the envelope and open it and it says
- “enjoy the meal, you kids. tell hoshi he has the rest of the day off, and just go on a date already. i’ll let you borrow the scooter this once. just don’t break it again.”
- hoshi asks “so?? what does it say??” and you shake your head like “oh nothing!!” but hoshi manages to snatch it out of your hands and after reading it, his whole face turns red
- he says “i’m SO sorry about all this….. uhhh you can have the chicken, i’ll just be on my way now…..”
- but you stop him “hoshi wait” and he turns around
- your cheeks turn pink as you say “….if you don’t mind….. i wouldn’t mind actually going on a date……”
- and hoshi’s face lights up and he runs up to you and says “REALLY??” and you laugh and just say “YES HOSHI”
- after eating the chicken, hoshi takes you out on a date in the city and he drives the scooter while you’re sitting in the back with your arms wrapped around him
- at the end of the day, hoshi drops you home and goes back to the restaurant during closing time to drop off the scooter
- inside, he goes up to seungcheol who’s counting the cash register and he gives him a big hug
- when he lets go, he tells him “you’re the best!!!!”
- he smiles at him and says “i’m guessing things went well?” and he nods his head “thank you!!!”
- after a quick good night, he leaves the restaurant and seokmin tells him “you’re such a softie”
- and seungcheol just laughs “you know hoshi deserves it.”

thank you for your request!! ^^

Kyungsoo touched Jongin’s face during Growl performance theory.

A video posted by @kkaisoo on Jan 10, 2016 at 2:58am PST

This is the video that I’m going to talk about.

Before you continue, I’ll remind you that shit is about to get delusional and there’ll be shit ton of cussing and me being a sarcastic bitch, while I’m at it everything that I’ll say here is not a fact although I think it is facts and everything that I’ll say here is my opinions. Thank you!

…After watching this video for 4896374 times I am left with hundreds of questions. When I saw this of course I fucking shit my asshole and I had a meantal breakdown. Some of my questions are, what was Jongin’s face during that time? Other members, how did they react? What happened next? Was Jongin annoyed? What happened after the performance? 

This video is only 13 fucking seconds and it’s not enough to satisfy my delusional brain and it doesn’t help that I’m skeptical, I always fucking question things and here I am writing my theory. As I said, this video is too short for my liking so I went to YouTube and searched for different angles of this performance as much as I can. Downloaded them all, made them into gifs, and boom, a theory was born.

Let’s start with Kyungsoo and Minseok mischievously smiling at each other right before Kyungsoo’s verse started.

Alright, this is an angle where we could see Kyungsoo smile no sHit.  You see that smile? This bitch is hiding something. I can fucking smell it Do Kyungsoo. Now, let’s look at and angle where we could see Minseok smiling back at him.

It’s a little blurry but you can survive. In the first set of gifs you could clearly see Minseok smile but people will shit on my head and they’ll be doubtful. So here I am, showing you a different angle. Their smiles were the one that lead me to question this whole thing. Those smiles are usually the kind of smiles that friends exchange with each other when they planned stupid shit. I don’t know about you but that is how I smile at my friend when we indeed planned something.

You could just tell me that they’re just casually smiling at each other but since I’m a fucking trash this is not normal and you can’t tell me what to do. And so I investigated and investigated, and investigated…

And it lead me to another point.

Plenty of people just simply watched this video and screamed their head off not even curious what Jongin did/looked like when Kyungsoo was touching him. If you’re curious (which I thought you would be because you’re reading this post) then here is what he looked like during those times:

YOU SEE HOW FUCKING SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED HE IS?¿?”:\

dRAG ME TO HELL BUT YOU CAN’T DENY HE LOOKED BOTHERED AS FUCK

DOESN’T THAT SCREAM SEXUAL TENSION TO YOU OR ARE YOU JUST BLIND??¿’;{54

BITCH PLEASE

I’m not even going to forget to mention that he glanced at Kyungsoo two times during this gifs period. Go back and see for yourself. And I’m not even going to forget that he was breathing hard and did you see the way he tenses up? HELLO? Someone help this horny child out of his blazer please.

He can’t even look at Kyungsoo when he was touching him. I wonder how many rounds did they fuck that night? 1? 2? 9? 3598750?

Jongin was probably eye fucking Kyungsoo at that time after he touched him. He always eye fucks him anyways.

God, I’m such a trash.

ANYWAYS, it looks like Jongin pushed Kyungsoo arm or smth but it all depends on the angle, and this angle is all we have so you’ll have to judge for your own good:

Personally, I think Jongin did push Kyungsoo’s arm slightly, because if I were in Jongin’s position I would’ve too even though I love like Kyungsoo’s palm on my cheek. Why would I do that if I were in Jongin’s shoes? Well, I think I would want it to be less obvious. I’m gonna start a new paragraph to explain this thoroughly.

Maybe Jongin wanted to make it a little less obvious. But that is not fucking working because he took off his blazer looking horny as hell and I think that is a dumbest move he ever made in his whole life if he were trying to make it less obvious. If he was trying to make it less obvious he already failed from the fucking start because as I said, he took off that blazer looking hot as hell and there’s no way he can make it less obvious when their friends literally did the same action Kyungsoo did to him seconds ago. IMHO, I think Kyungsoo is tired of being subtle touches and hiding all the time. He did this because he knows people will think it’s all for fans to see, all for fans to like/love, all for fan service. But there’s something inside of me that thinks that is not true. I think he did it on purpose to rile Jongin up. 

Wow, that’s a nice prompt for anyone to write a Kaisoo smut on. ;)

Moving along, when Kaisoo was happening the rest of the members were turned to the back and some of them were staring at the screen, right? So I decided to take a closer looks at the members when Kaisoo was happening.

The member’s positions if you are curious.

This is Chanyeol, the member who doesn’t give a fuck and just wants to get off the stage. Personally, I think he’s used to it. Like he didn’t even move a single face muscle when Kyungsoo touched Jongin. If he is used to it, I wonder if he’s used to hearing moans as well from Kaisoo’s room?

Minseok and Suho: The assholes that were involved in this shit. They looked pretty chill but they’re watching for a very, very good reason later on. ;)

The other members are pretty much zoning out, Baekhyun and Jongdae staring at the floor, Lay looking at the fans, Sehun fixing his hair for 496824759130 times that day, Jongin’s dick hard as hell and Kyungsoo looking proud as fuck. :)

Let’s get a little bit more exciting, shall we?

After this moment, Minseok, Yixing, and Suho’s verse came. You know what Minseok and Suho did?

THEY IMITATED WHAT KYUNGSOO DID TO JONGIN.

That’s the part where I shit my pants and started crying blood. My tear ducts hurt as hell and I swear to god I wanted to kill someone because oh my fucking god I never saw it coming.

FOR FUCKS SAKE GIVE ME TIME TO BREATHE

IM???.’’;[394

I CANT FEEL MY TOES WHILE IM WRITING THIS

I’m going to calm down and explain shit because that is what I’m here for. i don’t really know what to fucking explain because this is pretty much self-explanatory but I’ll fucking do it anyways—

Minseok touched Kyungsoo’s cheek using his knuckles, literally the same way Kyungsoo touched Jongin but only by the knuckles. Suho touched Jongdae by the neck and that’s exactly the way Kyungsoo seduced Jongin, only missing the sliding my hand across your chest part.

Let’s break it into two parts. 

Let’s talk about Minseok and Kyungsoo’s moment first. Here’s a closeup so you could see better:

Closer:

Look at Kyungsoo smiling though. Look at Minseok’s fucking smile like—

exCUsE U wHAT THE FUCK>???

They’re basically teasing Kyungsoo right now. Like holy shit wouldn’t friends tease you when you did something in front of your crush? That smile Kyungsoo made and he looks so shy and embarrassed. He’s like, are they really teasing me right now and he looks so cute I want you to see his smile in another angle:

FUCK ME

Kill me but don’t you deny that he looked so fucking shy. That grin is so cute I’m gonna jump off a cliff and that fucking smile is going to be death of my dead body. He really looked so shy though. I guess he didn’t saw this coming as well. I bet he thought that they’re just going to let this go and just do their thing and not tease him right in front of the fans. But thank god Minseok and Suho did this shit because this moment is my gospel now. They made it more obvious which I like, Kyungsoo and Jongin are so obvious it’s amusing how they always try to hide it while showing it. Two sides contradicts but you fucking get it, alright.

Let’s move our focus to Suho and Jongdae moment.

This is LQ as hell because I’m a piece of lazy shit but you can still clearly see Suho’s smile and Jongdae’s most gayest reaction. Jongdae doesn’t seem to know that Suho will do that to him. His reaction says it all. It’s quite funny because he’s so shocked he just had to put his palm over his mouth.

Let’s take a step further just to see more around the field.

Jongdae was probably thinking, did he just fucking do that or is this the feeling that jongin felt when kyungsoo touched him because that fucking reaction screams those thoughts for me.

Did you guys see Sehun? I was protesting with myself whether he knows something or he’s just simply laughing at Jongdae’s reaction. Since I’m a trash, I don’t believe the latter.

I’m keeping a close eye on you, Oh Sehun. 

I was asking myself what was Jongin’s reaction when Minseok touched Kyungsoo and Suho touched Jongdae and thank god there were blessed fancams and his reaction is priceless.

There’s a lot going on in this gif and did i even mention that six of them are fucking smiling/laughing just because of this whole thing. You can’t see shit from this angle but you can clearly see Jongin laugh. I’ll show a better angle.

THAT SMILE THO

The last second of this gif Jongin actually looked at Kyungsoo after he glanced at Minseok. Goddamn he looks so happy after he saw what their friends did to Kyungsoo. They’re teasing them and this is going to be so fucking delusional but if there was nothing going on with Kyungsoo and Jongin, they would’ve not copied Kyungsoo, Jongin would’ve not fucking smiled like this, Kyungsoo would’ve not laughed when Minseok touched him, Jongin would’ve not looked so hot and bothered after Kyungsoo touched him, Minseok and Kyungsoo would’ve not smiled evilly right from the start, Six of them would’ve not fucking smiled and laughed at the same time at the same shit, none of this would’ve happened if it’s all fanservice. It’s just Kyungsoo touching Jongin’s face, done. Nothing more.

But the opposite happened.

Minseok and Kyungsoo did look at each other and smiled evilly, Jongin did look horny as hell, Minseok and Suho did imitate Kyungsoo, Kyungsoo and Jongin did laugh at what their friends did. Am I even going to say more because I’ve proven what I think. Basically, what I am saying is that they’re in a relationship. That’s not really new but according to my experiences, my life and my friends, friends do tease each other when their friend did something to someone they like/love. Because I’m that friend who is like Minseok/Suho, copying what they did in front of their crush to my other friend. I’m not gonna copy if I think it’s too intimate tho lmAo. But yeah, you get my point.

As I stated earlier that Jongin looked at Kyungsoo, here’s a closer look:

I forgot to mention that Kyungsoo is smiling like an idiot too like Jongin. Wow, couples are really alike.

Crop it up and slow it down:

Keep reading

ok you know the smh has gotta have a lot of inside jokes but i bet this is even worse with those that live in the haus bc they’re constantly around each other so here are some haus inside jokes & memes with help from @abermb 

  • Ass Discourse
  • ransom said “bilk mag” instead of milk bag once and they’ve all said bilk mag so often they actually say that first instead of milk bag
    • when ransom’s at home he’ll be like “i’m gonna go get a mag of- fuck, a bilk- fuckigngn fuck”
  • “please don’t fuck the geese”
  • asking jack to sign increasingly ridiculous things when some stranger asks him for his autograph (this is a canon thing from the twitter but i can’t find the link)
  • “when my mother breastfed me there was definitely some vodka in there”
    • “vodka. like mother’s milk, only better.”
    • “vodka: kid tested, mother approved.”
  • that time they discovered derek and eric rhyme and wouldn’t shut up about it
    • they still haven’t shut up about it
    • “deric”
  • “lock your door or jack will steal your gold”
  • lardo, the tiny cave gremlin, 
  • “why don’t you go ask the COCKROACHES” 
    • cockroaches is always screamed at full volume, emphasis on the “cock”
  • bitty threatening to climb in the oven if anyone is mean to him
    • “bitty do your homework” “bye y’all time to go live in the oven”
  • (anything): happens (someone): “jack why don’t u take a picture of it”
  • holster settles down to watch one of his shows. someone is already on the couch. the tv is turned to a static channel. “oh, sorry holster,” they say, “guess you’ll have to wait till my show’s over.” they look at the tv and laugh as they eat popcorn. a tear slips down holster’s face.
  • constantly asking if anyone’s fed the cat. they don’t have a cat.
    • jack: “you don’t have a cat” shitty: “i can’t believe u let her die”
  • nursey’s mystical seducing guitar
  • making up bullshit southern sayings and then nudging bitty conspiratorially as if he knows what tf they’re talking about
    • “it’s hotter out here than a cocker spaniel rubbed in oil and stuck in a tree, right bitty?”
    • “that boy bakes more than a zebra in the middle of boston on a november afternoon”
    • bitty: “im climbing in the fuckgin oven” 
  • coming up with a fake teammate and talking about him on social media like he’s a close friend
    • “borky, man, what a guy. that goal, tho!!!!” 
    • “BORKY THE BORKSTER, THIS MAN RIGHT HERE. BEST GUY I KNOW.”
    • chowder: “what”
  • alexei mashkov is 20 puppies in a coat who have managed to infiltrate the sports world 
    • they refer to tater as “them” and jack has no idea why; at first he thinks it’s a gender pronoun thing but then he realizes they’re using the plural they and is even more confused
  • texting bitty that they’re out of butter when 1. he’s already stressed and 2. the fridge is literally full of butter
  • drawing faces on all of the eggs and screaming bloody murder when bitty cracks them
    • dex does this the most
    • “NOOOOOOOOOO I DREW NURSEY’S FACE ON THAT ONE YOU KILLED NURSEY YOU FUCKING MURDERER YOU’LL PAY FOR THIS” “dex pls stop screaming and let me bake in peace”
  • guilting chowder about things he hasn’t done like he’s a dog
    • “you’ve fucking done it now chowder. jesus christ. what the fuck is wrong with you, man” “I’M SO SORRY I DON’T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT I’M REALLY SORRY” [bitty voice] “chowder honey you didn’t do anything” “and now bitty’s in on it. incredible. we can’t trust anyone”
  • “nursey’s father will hear about this”
  • several different memes about the size of holster’s head
    • “if the world is destroyed from global warming we can all just move to holster’s head it’s big enough for several million people”
  • always cutting shitty off no matter what he’s talking about with “stop mansplaining”
  • dex has a sound effects app on his phone and plays sounds that do not match the situation at all
    • [bitty drops a spoon] dex: [duck quack]
    • lardo: “i just bombed that test dudes” dex: [airhorn]
  • sharing pictures of frogs to social media and tagging whiskey and tango in them
    • [photoshopped jerseys onto 2 tiny frogs] “good game boys!!! our freshman really did it for us today!!”
  • feel free to add your own memes
Nobubu’s Twitter “hijacking”

[All the unlabelled tweets are Nobu. If it’s someone else talking, they would label the name]

今日から五月十四日まで 「ついったーをじゃっく」する。 貴様が送ってきためっせーじとやらには……気が向いたら返信してやる。 参加するときの注意事項はあかうんとの自己紹介欄に書いてある。確認しておけ。

(pinned tweet) From now until the 14th of May, I will be “Twitter-jacking”. Those things called “message” that you sent… I will reply whenever I feel like it. Participation rules and guidelines are in the profile section. Take a look at it.

本日よりついったーをじゃっくする。 貴様に、ついったーの天下を見せてやる。 俺についてこい。

Starting today, I’ve hijacked this Twitter. I will show you my domination on Twitter. Follow me.

ふん。じどりしゃしんとやらを特別に載せてやる。 光秀、撮れ。

Hm. I think I should do this thing called “selfie” photo to commemorate the occasion. Mitsuhide, take a picture.

光秀(私が撮っては“自撮り”とは言わない気が…)

Mitsuhide: (If I take the picture, I think you can’t call it “selfie” anymore)

蘭丸「蘭丸です!本日から御屋形様のお誕生日をお祝いするがちゃが配信開始されております!1回がちゃを回すと、特別な物語が貰えるそうです。御屋形様とおそろいの着物も見逃せませんね」

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! Starting from today, Milord’s birthday celebration lottery has launched! It seems that whether you do the 1 time spin or 5 time spin, you can get the special story. I will definitely not miss Milord’s matching kimono.

俺と同じ着物を貴様が着るのか。 特別に俺が気に入っている場所を教えてやろう。

Dressed in the same kimono as I, are you. When you that I will tell you my special favourite place.

[i.e the Azuchi castle BG that is part of the lottery]

蘭丸「蘭丸です!昨年までのお誕生日物語ももちろん復刻中です。逃してしまっていた方はこの機会に確認してみてください」

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! Of course we’re also re-releasing last year’s birthday stories. On this occasion, please confirm the stories that you have previously missed.

[Last year’s birthday story sets also include VOICE SETS]

秀吉「御屋形様!お誕生日おめでとうございます~!いやあ、めでたい!」#祝_信長BD #御屋形様 #織田信長 #お祝い #お誕生日 #めでたい

Hideyoshi: Milord! Happy Birthday~! Aah, how auspicious! #祝_信長BD #Milord #Oda Nobunaga #celebrate #birthday #auspicious

[ #祝_信長BD is the hashtag you use for Nobu’s birthday on Twitter]

蘭丸「蘭丸です!新しいいべんとが配信開始となりました。今回のいべんとは“ちょっと刺激的”…とのことです…。尾張からは石田三成様が参加されております。」 #恋焦れ日和

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! A new event has started. This time it’s a “rather exciting” event… or so I heard…. From Owari, we have Lord Ishida Mitsunari participating. #恋焦れ日和

[The title of the event literally translates to something like “The weather for love provocation”. I’m not poetic enough to make that sound nice OTL]

ふん、“恋焦れ日和”…か。
貴様、焦らされるのは好きか?

Hm, “weather for love provocation”… is it.
You, do you like provocation?

蘭丸「蘭丸です!今回のいべんと“恋焦れ日和”ですが、残念ながら絵巻は無いようです。ですが、物語を少しのぞき見してみたいと思います」

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! This event, unfortunately it has no illustrations (CGs). However, I still want to look at the stories a little. 

幸村「俺の欲望の餌食にお前をしてしまった……!」
「俺を殴ってくれ!」 #恋焦れ日和 #真田幸村

(event trailer)

Yukimura: “I have made you prey to my desires…! Strike me!” #[event title] #Sanada Yukimura

こやつは何を言っている?
殴ってほしいとは危篤な奴だ

What is he saying? Wanting you to hit him, what a critically dying* guy

光秀「御屋形様、漢字を間違えております。“奇特”です」

Mitsuhide: Milord, you wrote the wrong word. It should have been "incredible”

[ 危篤 and 奇特 are both read “kitoku”. Nobu means 奇特 (incredible, praise-worthy) but made a typo wrote 危篤 (on the verge of death/critically dying) instead]

三成「本当に、我慢してやらない……」 #恋焦れ日和 #石田三成

(event preview)
Mitsunari: Truly, I cannot hold back… #[event title] #Ishida Mitsunari

三成はどうした?厠でも我慢しているのか? とっとと行ってこい。

What’s wrong with Mitsunari? Does he need to go to the toilet? Just go ahead and do it.

[OMFG NOBU WAIIII]

秀吉に“はっしゅたぐ”とやらをやれと言われた。 試してやるか

Hideyoshi told me about this thing called “hashtag”. Should I try it?

#あなたがガチギレすると
やされたいか

#You try my patience
… do you want to be burned?

#は行でなぜモテないのか分かる
は…早くしろ
ひ…秀吉
ふ…服を脱げ
へ…平常心だ
ほ…ほら見たことか
 ……ん?なんだこれは?

#Why I’m not popular, “ha” line 
Ha: Hayakushiro (Quickly)
Hi: Hideyoshi 
Fu: Fuku o nuge (take off clothes)
He: Heijoshinda (it’s my normal state of mind)
Ho: Hora mitakotoka (didn’t I tell you so?)

….. Hm? What the heck is this?

[OMFG NOBU WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY]

[ #は行でなぜモテないのか分かる  is like a meme where you take the hiragana “lines” and use it to make an acrostic. “は行で” indicates the “ha” line, meaning ha hi fu he ho. So if you change the line indicator, for example into “ra” ら行で, then you use ra ri ru re ro.  ]

秀吉「やめてください!!!!!誤解されます!!!!!君も!何もない!何もないからね!!!!!」

Hideyoshi: Please stop that!!!!! It’s a misunderstanding!!!! You too! There’s nothing! There’s nothing here, okay!!!!!

[OH GOD IT GOT WORSE, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH]

光秀に撮らせては“じどり”ではないだと…?
試しに自分でやってみたが難しい。
勝家にでもやり方を聞いてみるか…

If Mitsuhide takes the photo, it’s not “selfie” is it…?
I tried to do it myself and it was difficult.
Maybe I should ask Katsuie how to do it…

明日は何の日か知っているな…?
特別にお前からのめっせーじに返信して…やらんこともない。
楽しみにしている。

Do you know what day is it tomorrow…?
As a special treat, I will reply to your messages… I will definitely do it.
Look forward to it

貴様。
祝いのめっせーじが足らんようだが…
俺を祝う気はあるのか? #祝_信長BD

You.
What kind of worthless greeting messages are these…
Do you seriously intend to congratulate me?

蘭丸「蘭丸です!めんてなんすにご協力いただきましてありがとうございました。藤林朔夜という方の本編にぼいすが追加されております」

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! Thank you for your cooperation during the maintenance. In the main route for the person named Fujibayashi Sakuya, voices have been added.

藤林朔夜だと?誰だそれは。……朔太郎に似ているようだが?

Fujibayashi Sakuya? Who’s that. ……He resembles Sakutarou, no?

蘭丸「蘭丸です!合わせて、月の章で初めての“恋乱”が配信開始しております。手裏剣を集めて、家具や忍たちの衣装を手に入れましょう」 #恋乱 #桜月夜 #月の章

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! By the way, Moon Chapter’s first “Battle Event” has started. Let’s collect shuriken, and get room furniture and ninja’s costumes #BattleEvent #SakuraMoonlitNight #MoonChapter

貴様の存在のせいで、貴様と出会う前の誕生日など忘れてしまった。
どうしてくれるんだ?
貴様のような女は俺でなければ相手はできん…それは逆も然りだ。 来年も再来年も一番近くで俺を祝え。離れる事は許さん。

Because you’re here, I no longer remember my birthdays from before we met. Why is that so?
Other than I, nobody else can be with a woman like you… The same applies for the reverse. Next year, and the year after, celebrate close to me. You’re forbidden to leave. 

[During his birthday he doesn’t say much, LOL. I guess he really was busy repying to messages (I didn’t send any)]

蘭丸「蘭丸です!華の章のいべんとは進めていますか?くりあ特典は柑橘系の可愛い着物一式です。甘酸っぱいいべんとの内容にぴったりですね」 #恋焦れ日和

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! Have you started Flower Chapter’s event? The route clear bonus is a cute citrus kimono set. The Bittersweet event’s story just hits the spot, doesn’t it? #[event title]

今日は気分がいい

I feel good today

秀吉にじどりをさせた

Hideyoshi took a selfie

金平糖と茶はまだか?

Are the konpeitou and tea still not ready yet?

いつまで起きている。
……さては、俺の帰りを待っていたのであろう
早く眠れば良いものを

How long are you going to stay awake for.
…… Not to mention, waiting for my return
Hurry and sleep

光秀

Mitsuhide

蘭丸「蘭丸です!月の章の恋乱は、順調に差入れしていますか?藤林朔夜のぼいするーとを進めながら、手裏剣を集めて推し忍に差入れしてみてはいかがでしょうか?」

Ranmaru: This is Ranmaru! Did your participate in the Moon Chapter Battle Event without difficulties? Since fujibayashi Sakuya’s coiced route has been released, how about collecting shuriken and submitting it to the ninja to support them?

今日でじゃっくは終わりだ。
貴様、なんだその顔は。
またついったーとやらをじゃっくしに戻ってきてやる。
貴様に天下を見せてやらねばならんからな

Today the jacking ends.
You, what’s with that face.
I will come back to jack this Twitter thing again.
I must show you my domination

(The End)

whovian1077  asked:

Okay I just wanna say, like, just say if Tina hadn't brought Newt in and immediately just let him go because she liked him, people would have complained that she put him above the law even though she had just met him! Realistically, someone who has a career in any form of government would bring in anyone that they see breaking the law, they wouldn't just let them off because they talked to them once or twice. People never know what they want these days! #MoreLoveForTinaGoldstein <3<3<3

^^THIS^^

If she had just let him go because he was cute or whatever, there would have been HUNDREDS of complaints from the haters saying that she’s “weak” or whatever for putting a man before her career…? And yet they hate on her for being career-driven, just because “OMFG NEWT IS SUCH A CINAMMON ROLL I WANT TO MARRY HIM AND HAVE HIS BABIES!!!!!1!”

Like, I LOVE Newt too, he’s awkward and adorable but like…? He’s not perfect, he WAS breaking the law, Tina did the right thing by bringing him in. We see Newt through movie-goer goggles, so our perspective of him is rose-tinted - but in the universe of the film, Tina did what any law-abiding Auror would do and she does NOT deserve hate for it!

Originally posted by hardyness

#MoreLoveForTinaGoldstein #ProtectTinaGoldstein2k17 #TinaDeservesMoreLove

anonymous asked:

Fantasy au shance: Shiro is a human knight, Lance is a nymph who was born without their alluring powers so he always tries to overcompensate with over the top flirting and stuff. Shiro is underimpressed, but he finds himself oddly charmed by the *real* moments Lance shows him. In the end, he's just as smitten as if Lance had put an alluring spell on him, and Lance is of course amazed by his good luck because like DAMN Shiro is a keeper. All his nymph friends are super jealous (bicep anon)

bicep anon literally what did we do to deserve you you beautiful bean

i wanna draw this so bad omfg

vixapix  asked:

(1/2) Your doodle of pouty shiro just made me to write a fanfic of shiro...just...he's had a long day, galra are being shits again, he is definitely Not Missing, and it's just been a long day so he lets loose and just lets himself be childish. And like none of the other paladins know what to do (except maybe keith cuz they totally knew each other before Kerberos and Shiro has done this right after exams) and they're all just shocked, like where is their mature leader? what is happening?!

(2/2) Meanwhile keith is just there, like “Eat your space much you baby.” and lance of course is confused because how is he supposed to treat shiro when the guy is his LEADER but is currently acting like his youngest sibling when they’re refusing broccoli??? Pidge is confused and Hunk is scrambling to make some alien mush that shiro will eat, coran will be firing questions asking if this is normal human behavior and Allura just Sighs…(shiro just wants some icecream, is that too much to ask?)

OH MY GOSH. I’m assuming it’s this Shiro doodle you’re talking too, right? 8D Keith definitely would be just like that! <3 And they get to witness just how close Keith and Shiro are! That would be adorable. LMAO 

Also I want Shiro to nuzzle Keith and Keith would just roll his eyes and go “Do we have anything equivalent to ice cream? The big baby wants his ice cream.” 

The guys are just scandalized. “Did you just call Shiro a big baby?”

“Yes, I did. Because that’s what he is.”

“Keeeeiiiithhhhhhh,” Shiro pouts.

“We’ll get you that ice cream, sweetheart.” Keith pats Shiro’s cheek affectionally and Shiro beams like Keith just gave him the moon.

The rest just gapes at them at their exchange. HAHHAHAHA

Jeff x OC

Originally posted by imagineseverywhere

Part 1

Warnings: Language. Fluff (not yet)

I do not live in America so I am sorry if I get things wrong but I tried my best :)


Walking into the library, I searched for my idiotic brother, Clay. He was once again tutoring Jeff. History, I think it was. Once my eyes landed on the both of them, I started walking over. My eyes were on the back of a certain person head. Jeff. Ever since I met him - by Clay - I’ve had this butterfly feeling in my stomach when we talk or catch eyes. Yeah, I know, Cheesy. Right? I’m nothing like my brother. I’m not socially awkward or shy when it come to feelings. Well, not usually. But for some reason, Jeff makes me shy and nervous when he’s around.

Once I reached the table I place my bag on the floor next to Clay and sat on the empty chair which caught both men’s attention. “Hey, Liv.” Clay greeted first. I rolled my eyes at the nickname as I felt another pair of eyes on me. “Will you ever stop calling me that.” I sigh. “Nope.” He replied popping the ‘P’.

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