what beer is for

600 Follower Celebration - Gif Blurbs

The wonderful @skymoonandstardust submitted this one, I hope you enjoy! 

“C’mon Y’N!” Dean yelled over the loud music blasting through Baby’s speakers, drumming his hands on the steering wheel and singing his lungs out to Led Zeppelin’s Immigrant Song, one of your shared favorites. You laughed and joined in on the apparent fun, singing and carrying on, not having a care in the world.

Once the song was over Dean turned the radio down and pulled you close to his side, kissing your forehead lovingly.

“So, what were you thinking for dinner Sweetheart?” Dean asked, giving you one of those classic Dean Winchester smirks that made your heart skip a beat.

“Hmm…” You jokingly contemplated, knowing you were gonna say what you always do. “Oh I know!” You exclaimed over excitedly. “What about burgers, fries, pie and beer?” You said, looking over at your boyfriend and smiling brightly at him.

“Ya’ know, I’m one lucky man.” Dean responded as he pulled into your favorite diner, feeling happier than he had in a long time with you by his side.


Join The Celebration Fun 

  • Pete: Hi
  • Brendon: it was the summer of 2001, and Joe meets Patrick and he's like "yo, I know about music." then Patrick's like "yo I know more about music!" "that's impossible. so you wanna start a band?" and Patrick's like, "yeah that's cool." and then, he's like "yo this is a book store not a music store." and then they met at Patrick's house. so Patrick's wearing shorts, socks, and a hat. Patrick is playing drums for some fuckin' reason and then Pete's there for some reason. and they start playing music together and they're like "oh, let's play some covers from some other bands." it was like Green Day, and fuckin' Misfits, and fuckin' Ramones. Pete said to Joe, "yo, that's dope, but we need a fuckin' drummer." because Patrick's playing drums and he's a singer. Patrick's like "yo, I got a soul voice," and they're like "wait how do you have a soul voice?" and he's like "yo, watch this: YEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEeeeeeeAAAAAAAAaaaaAAaahhh!" and they're like, "oh my god, that sounds like soul!" so they put it in a song, and it was like, "WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIIIIIIIiiiiiIIIIIIIIIiiiIIIIIIIGHT?!" and they're like "yo that's fuckin perfect, this is Fall Out Boy." and they made records like Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it. "it's called Evening Out With Your Girlfriend." with your ex-girlfriend. it's called evening out with your Ex-girlfriend. it's called eating out your girlfriend, and it's real and it doesn't matter. and Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he's like "you what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. yo, this is gonna be fuckin' doooooooooope!" so they made a record and it was called Take this to Your Grave. they made it without a drummer, and they had like 3—4 drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like Josh Freese, Neil Pert, the dude from Toto, the fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something, and they're like "you, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take This to Your Grave. Fuckin' record it." and he did, and he killed it, and he was like "bigidalililililillillilila, PSHHH!" killin' the skin, tapping the skins, tapping the rim, playin' the shit, killing these bitches, rapping it out. you're getting a fucking tattoo right now?! what the fuck is going on?! We should get signed to Fueled By Ramen, 'cause thee guys know what the fuck is going on. and they were like "yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin' hard, we will sign you guys." and Pete was like "yo, we got this record that's fuckin' dooooooope, dude, it's called Take This to Your Grave, it's called From Under the Cork Tree it's gonna be fucking huge." and then Patrick's like "I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic, these are three songs that are gonna make the album and it's called-BURP-Thnks Fr th Mmrs, 20 Dollar Nose Bleed, and Sugar, Were Goin' Down. and they made this record that was fuckin' dope, and it fucking hit on the charts like one two three, three two one, three four five six seven eight nine ten. ten to one. From Under the Cork Tree sold like four million records. ten million records. fifteen million records. and Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. and Patrick was like "that's gooooOOOOoooooOOOOOOOOd." Pete was like, "yo, fuck you I can do whatever I want." and Joe was like, "yeah it's cool man whatever I don't give a shit." and then Andy was like "eh, cool." and Pete was like "Make up is fuckin' great for a guy. because it makes a guy look beautiful, which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. and I wanna change that. I wanna make sure everyone thinks that guys are beautiful." I'm good so far yeah. yeah I do. SHUT THE FUCK. oh fuck, alright alright. Pete was like "oh my god, I'm so embarrassed about this dick pic." and then I saw the dick pic and was like "ah it's not bad." it's not a bad dick. let's be real. we made Rollins Stones one issue before Fall Out Boy. and Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed they were like "yo, fuck you guys!" they're like "yo! Panic! has the fuckin' cover for Rolling Stones, yo, fuck these dudes, we're gonna fucking go miles above. we're gonna hit every fuckin' continent there is known to man." but they didn't because they missed a second of time. apparently they were like "oh shit, we got every continent." and they didn't actually hit it. dude, and Pete was like, "WHAT THE FUCK?! 'oh you didn't fuckin' make the continent' it's like FUCK YOU!" so From Under the Cork Tree happens, we fuckin' have three-four years of awesomeness. like, people are coming in themselves 'cause it's so big. Alright so Fall Out Boy was like-- so Patrick's like "yo, we are going to name these records from under the Cork tree and from Innity-- from infinity on high." Pete was like "yo folie à deux means the theatric of two." "The madness of two." oh sorry I'm sorry. follow boy was like "yo we got to take a break." Meaning Pete was like "yo we got to take a break bro." and Patrick's like "I need time for my music. UHUhUhUHuhUUUh." and joes like "yo I need time to find the fucking art dude I got to find some fucking me-- metal" and andys like "i'm just gonna play with some fucking metal bands." and they're like "all right this breaks been like three years long two years long three years long 3 1/2? we gotta fucking come back man we gotta come back strong." you took my beer away what the fuck? "no you poured it all over yourself." "yeah you poured it on yourself man here." "we got to make this shit legit it's gonna be fucking dope it's going to go fucking sky high. we're going to make a fucking record that sails the skies. we're going to call this record save rock 'n' roll." so they made alone together light 'em up alone together Phoenix. and everybody's like "what the fuck? you're working with this guy who fuckin' recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk." is this pu-- what the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on myself? oh god. Pete was like "yo were gonna end up on a tour with Panic! At The Disco and twenty pilots. and that's all and that's all that matters. and that's just how the fuckin' story goes."

autumn is here 🍁🍂💛

4

LINDSAY AND HALSTEAD IN EVERY EPISODE || Deliver Us (2x21)

Right? Cold beer. Grown men on skates. What’s not to love?

Mine

Originally posted by worldstyles

REQUEST: Jealous Harry smut

HARRY’S TEXTS // (Y/N)’S TEXTS

Keep reading

Me as a parent
  • kid: mom tell me a story
  • me: it was the summer of 2001, and Joe meets Patrick and he's like "yo, I know about music." then Patrick's like "yo I know more about music!" "that's impossible. so you wanna start a band?" and Patrick's like, "yeah that's cool." and then, he's like "yo this is a book store not a music store." and then they met at Patrick's house. so Patrick's wearing shorts, socks, and a hat. Patrick is playing drums for some fuckin' reason and then Pete's there for some reason. and they start playing music together and they're like "oh, let's play some covers from some other bands." it was like Green Day, and fuckin' Misfits, and fuckin' Ramones. Pete said to Joe, "yo, that's dope, but we need a fuckin' drummer." because Patrick's playing drums and he's a singer. Patrick's like "yo, I got a soul voice," and they're like "wait how do you have a soul voice?" and he's like "yo, watch this: YEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEeeeeeeAAAAAAAAaaaaAAaahhh!" and they're like, "oh my god, that sounds like soul!" so they put it in a song, and it was like, "WHERE IS YOUR BOY TONIIIIIIIiiiiiIIIIIIIIIiiiIIIIIIIGHT?!" and they're like "yo that's fuckin perfect, this is Fall Out Boy." and they made records like Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend. Evening Out With Your Ex-Girlfriend, everybody loves it. "it's called Evening Out With Your Girlfriend." with your ex-girlfriend. it's called evening out with your Ex-girlfriend. it's called eating out your girlfriend, and it's real and it doesn't matter. and Pete talked to Patrick and Joe and he's like "you what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. yo, this is gonna be fuckin' doooooooooope!" so they made a record and it was called Take this to Your Grave. they made it without a drummer, and they had like 3—4 drummers come in. The four drummers they had come in were like Josh Freese, Neil Pert, the dude from Toto, the fourth one was like the guy from Papa Roach or something, and they're like "you, we need Andy Hurley. Andy Hurley. Take This to Your Grave. Fuckin' record it." and he did, and he killed it, and he was like "bigidalililililillillilila, PSHHH!" killin' the skin, tapping the skins, tapping the rim, playin' the shit, killing these bitches, rapping it out. you're getting a fucking tattoo right now?! what the fuck is going on?! We should get signed to Fueled By Ramen, 'cause thee guys know what the fuck is going on. and they were like "yo, if you can make our scene any bigger than it is, which is not fuckin' hard, we will sign you guys." and Pete was like "yo, we got this record that's fuckin' dooooooope, dude, it's called Take This to Your Grave, it's called From Under the Cork Tree it's gonna be fucking huge." and then Patrick's like "I gotta keep it real, I gotta keep it artistic, these are three songs that are gonna make the album and it's called-BURP-Thnks Fr th Mmrs, 20 Dollar Nose Bleed, and Sugar, Were Goin' Down. and they made this record that was fuckin' dope, and it fucking hit on the charts like one two three, three two one, three four five six seven eight nine ten. ten to one. From Under the Cork Tree sold like four million records. ten million records. fifteen million records. and Brendon Urie had nothing to do with the entire record. and Patrick was like "that's gooooOOOOoooooOOOOOOOOd." Pete was like, "yo, fuck you I can do whatever I want." and Joe was like, "yeah it's cool man whatever I don't give a shit." and then Andy was like "eh, cool." and Pete was like "Make up is fuckin' great for a guy. because it makes a guy look beautiful, which a lot of times, a guy is not beautiful. and I wanna change that. I wanna make sure everyone thinks that guys are beautiful." I'm good so far yeah. yeah I do. SHUT THE FUCK. oh fuck, alright alright. Pete was like "oh my god, I'm so embarrassed about this dick pic." and then I saw the dick pic and was like "ah it's not bad." it's not a bad dick. let's be real. we made Rollins Stones one issue before Fall Out Boy. and Fall Out Boy made the issue right after us and they were so pissed they were like "yo, fuck you guys!" they're like "yo! Panic! has the fuckin' cover for Rolling Stones, yo, fuck these dudes, we're gonna fucking go miles above. we're gonna hit every fuckin' continent there is known to man." but they didn't because they missed a second of time. apparently they were like "oh shit, we got every continent." and they didn't actually hit it. dude, and Pete was like, "WHAT THE FUCK?! 'oh you didn't fuckin' make the continent' it's like FUCK YOU!" so From Under the Cork Tree happens, we fuckin' have three-four years of awesomeness. like, people are coming in themselves 'cause it's so big. Alright so Fall Out Boy was like-- so Patrick's like "yo, we are going to name these records from under the Cork tree and from Innity-- from infinity on high." Pete was like "yo folie à deux means the theatric of two." "The madness of two." oh sorry I'm sorry. follow boy was like "yo we got to take a break." Meaning Pete was like "yo we got to take a break bro." and Patrick's like "I need time for my music. UHUhUhUHuhUUUh." and joes like "yo I need time to find the fucking art dude I got to find some fucking me-- metal" and andys like "i'm just gonna play with some fucking metal bands." and they're like "all right this breaks been like three years long two years long three years long 3 1/2? we gotta fucking come back man we gotta come back strong." you took my beer away what the fuck? "no you poured it all over yourself." "yeah you poured it on yourself man here." "we got to make this shit legit it's gonna be fucking dope it's going to go fucking sky high. we're going to make a fucking record that sails the skies. we're going to call this record save rock 'n' roll." so they made alone together light 'em up alone together Phoenix. and everybody's like "what the fuck? you're working with this guy who fuckin' recorded Avril Lavigne and P!nk." is this pu-- what the fuck is this on my shirt, did I puke on myself? oh god. Pete was like "yo were gonna end up on a tour with Panic! At The Disco and twenty pilots. and that's all and that's all that matters. and that's just how the fuckin' story goes."
Take The Trade

Author: @sincerelystiles
Pairing: Dylan x Reader
Word Count: 2,836

Warning: THIS IS VERY SINFUL OH DEAR LORD

Part 2 
Part 3 
Part 4 (finale)

A/N: big fuckin thanks to the girls for encouraging me to finish this and being super supportive. i’ve been working on this for the longest time and it’s finally here, so enjoy mother fuckers x x

LISTEN TO THIS ON REPEAT!!!!


Originally posted by gabalecki




I throw the phone onto the couch, groaning in annoyance and stomping my feet like a child as I wander to the kitchen, huffing once more to catch Dylan’s attention. “What’s wrong?” He asks, his back still turned to me as he assorted popcorn and candy into different plastic tubs.

My shoulders slouch and I climb onto the island, crossing my legs and pulling an unsatisfied face. “Everyone’s busy, they can’t make it.” I grumble under my breath with furrowed eyebrows. Friday night was game night, everyone came over to my place to eat junk food, play stupid board games and get completely wasted. But, everyone decided they’d be busy this week, which couldn’t have been any more inconvenient.

“What do you mean everyone?” Dylan asks over his shoulder, grabbing the tubs with one hand each and carrying them into the living room. I groan at his actions, sliding off the countertop and following him through the arch as he places the bowls on either side of the Monopoly board that sprawled out over the coffee table.

I follow him back into the kitchen and watch as he raides through my fridge. “Well, Holl’s babysitting, Crystal and Ty are on a date, Cody is meeting some girl he’s been texting, and Shelley’s at that spa weekend with Arden.” I inform him, waiting for his response.

Dylan pulls two crates of beers from the fridge, closing it with his foot and walking back over to the couch, placing the crates of beer by his feet. “What about Sprayberry?” My eyes widen at his suggestion. “Do you not remember the last time we invited him?” I yelp, pointing toward the dark patch on the white wall that had been filled in after Sprayberry smashed his head through it.

He purses his lips to hide his smile and watches me plop onto the couch beside him. “Looks like it’s just you and I then.” Dylan shrugs, breaking into the case of beer, pulling two out and handing me one. I gaze up at him, taking the beer and smiling widely. “You’re gonna stay?” I ask hopefully, my smile only growing when he shrugs his shoulders and places his beer beside the boardgame.

“You can’t play monopoly alone.” I smile at him again, crawling off the couch and around the coffee table so we both sat opposed to each other. “You’re going down.” I tease, grabbing the dice from the centre and shaking them in my hands. “Game on, baby.”


“This is bullshit!” I giggle loudly, throwing a fifty in the middle. “Your fault you landed on Go to Jail.” Dyl laughs, rolling the die and taking his own turn. I grumbled childishly, watching as he moves his metal player around the board and landing on one of my hotel’s, typical. He grins at me, clearly amused that he didn’t have to pay as I was in jail. I glare at him, waiting for him to take his turn again.

We’ve been playing this for two hours, and currently I had the better properties, whilst Dyl had all the money. Empty bottles and random candies were spilled around us, the room slightly spinning which only entices a giggle from my swollen lips. I look through my sets, all of the yellows and greens, but only one blue. Mayfair was nothing without Park Lane, and I was determined to get that godforsaken card from him.

“Dyl come on, I know you love me. Just gimme Park Lane!” I smile seductively, or at least attempted to. He laughs at my statement, fingers scratching against the short stubble that coated his jaw adoringly. The flattering sight causes an ache between my legs and I shift uncomfortably.

With my bottom lip trapped between my teeth, my thighs rub together roughly, my face contorting in discomfort and I try to ease the throbbing between my legs. My eyes remain glued to his lips and the dark hairs that invade his pale skin. In the midst of my staring, his wet tongue peeks between his lips, and just at the simple action I find myself sputtering a cough so disguise my strangled whimper.

Dylan giggles to himself, unaware of the gaze I held on him and he finally looks up from the board, Mayfair in his hand and a grin on his face. “I’ll trade you Park Lane for a blowjob.” Laughter howls from my lips, and my chest shakes from the frantic laughter of his sudden outburst.

However, whilst I laughed at his comment, the wanting need and desire between my legs only grew at his words, and rubbing my thighs together would not be the way to ease the situation I was almost drowning in. “I’m getting us some more beers.” I giggle, standing from the beanbag I had been slumped upon and wobbling into the kitchen.

My body stumbles into the door of the refrigerator and I laugh quietly at my clumsiness. With my hands pressed against the cool metal, I slowly press myself off the fridge, however my back presses against a hard chest, trapping me in place.

My breathing hitches in my throat at the feeling of warm breath fanning over my shoulder. My eyes flutter closed as a hand wraps around my hair that falls over my chest and pulls it behind my back. Soft lips press against the newly exposed skin and my knees almost give way, until a muscular arm wraps around my waist and pulls me closer into their solid chest.

“So, what do you say about that deal?” Dylan’s groggy voice speaks, his lips hovering against my neck. I giggle at his comment, rolling my eyes playfully even though he wouldn’t see. “I think you made a great offer, but it’s something I’ll need to think about.” I tease breathlessly, my eyes fluttering closed once again.

Dylan’s warm tongue flattens against my skin and slowly runs along my neck, my body immediately reacting to the feeling and my ass presses into his crotch, a groan escaping his lips and I smirk to myself. “Come on baby, take the trade.” His grip on my waist only tightens and I find myself like putty in his hands. I spin in my tight position, my arms flung around his neck whilst his keep a firm grip on my waist.

I tangle my fingers into his dark hair and press my lips against his hungrily. Tongues dance messily whilst our lips move in perfect unison and I moan at the sudden feeling of Dylan’s hands massaging my ass. Without wanting, he hoists me into the air, my legs wrapping around his waist as I grind my soaking heat against his lower abdomen.

Dylan carries us out of the kitchen and into the living room, carefully maneuvering around the scattered beer bottles and plopping onto the couch. My legs straddled either side of his body as my fingers fumbled with the hem of his shirt. Dylan noticed my struggle and hesitantly breaks the kiss, tearing his shirt from his body and throwing it across the room.

My eyes stare adoringly at his toned torso, my panties soaking at the sight of the dark hair that gradually disappeared into his jeans and I find myself growing more and more excited by the second.

I press my lips against his, and slowly climb off his lap. My kisses follow my movements, lips pressing against lower areas of skin the further down my body slides, until I’m situated on the ground, between his open legs. I continue to kiss his torso until my lips come into contact with the rough material of his tight jeans, my chin grazing against his growing erection until I move my face away.

A low grunt escapes Dylan’s parted lips and I fiddle with the buckle of his belt, pulling it apart and slowly unbuttoning his jeans. My eyes flicker to his as I watch him through my lashes. His chest heaved heavily and the sound of his erratic pants echoed through the room as he witnessed my every move with every ounce of attention he could muster.

I smirk to myself, wiggling my ass a little which immediately catches his attention. Taking this to my advantage, I tear my shirt from my body; the cool air pelting against my bare chest and goosebumps begin their invasion. Dylan doesn’t notice my lack of attire until I fully unzip his pants, shoving my hand into his boxers and grasping firmly onto his erection.

He chokes back a moan at my sudden forwardness, whilst my eyes widen at the view before me. With a wicked giggle, I lick my lips in anticipation and prop myself up onto my knees. I lean forward slowly, Dyl’s eyes training on my breasts until I pull his big cock toward them, slotting it between the valley of my breasts.

“Oh, my..” His voice breaks when I press my tits together, creating a tighter grip on his cock. Slowly, I move myself up and down, precum spilling onto my skin and working as a form of lubricant as I continue to tease him. Dylan’s hand finds it’s way to the back of my head; his fingers tangling into my hair and pressing my face closer toward his crotch.

I take the hint, releasing my grasp and sinking back to the ground. I wrap a hand around his length, my other holding onto his thigh for support as I teasingly swirl my tongue over his oozing tip. “Baby come on, no teasing.” He whimpers, and the sound alone is enough to make me cum on the spot. I graciously oblige his wishes and wrap my wet lips around his cock, slowly sinking down until he hit the back of my throat.

My throat tightens around him as my nose buried itself in the dark patch of hair, which provokes a strangled moan from him. “Fuck baby, just like that.” He seethes and I hum in response, hollowing my cheeks around him and sliding back up his length. I suck gently on his tip, swirling my warm tongue over his slit and revelling in the filthy moans he gave me.

“Fuck this.” Dylan growls, viciously pulling me away from him by my hair. His lips smash into mine, and he grunts at the taste of himself on my lips. He stands from the couch, hands holding my wrists above my head as he backs me into a wall, my naked chest pressed against his whilst his cock sat squashed against our stomachs.

I moan at the feeling, knees falling weak when Dylan’s lips roamed over the sensitive skin of my neck. My arms remain above my head, one of his hands holding them in place whilst the other tugs down his jeans and boxers. My hips buck into his in excitement and anticipation, the alcohol that once ran through my blood turned to lust and desire, and it felt like I couldn’t get enough.

“Dyl,” I whine impatiently, gaining his attention once more. His dark eyes meet mine, his gaze trailing up to my trapped hands until they stop, a smirk forming upon his swollen lips, and my stomach churns nervously.

“Baby… what are you smirking at?” I question seriously, my heart stammering beneath my ribcage and I was sure my bones would shatter at any moment, given how hard it was throbbing. Before he pushes his jeans all the way down his legs, he holds onto the buckle of his belt, pulling it through the waist of his jeans and tugging it toward my wrists.

My heart drops when I realise what he was doing. My eyes follow the belt until I noticed the small chain hanging from the ceiling from where an old boxing bag had once hung and I mentally scold and thank myself for never getting around to take it down. “Dylan,” I whimper, clenching my fists as he tightly wraps the belt around my wrists, the clanking of metal indicating he had successfully attached it to the chain.

His hand slowly fall down my sides, gently squeezing my ass before he sets a soft kiss upon my forehead. He takes a step back, kicking his boxers off and toeing off his shoes and socks. My eyes widen at the sight of his naked body before me, and I shiver as he smirks at my vulnerable state. “Aren’t you a good little girl, huh? Standing there waiting patiently for me?” He taunts and my panties overflow with arousal at those simplistic words.

“Please, Dylan.” I gulp, rubbing my thighs together in attempt to ease the growing ache between my legs. He notices my struggle and slowly crouches down to his knees, spreading my legs apart and tearing the leggings off my legs. He grins up at me, setting himself between my legs and resting a thigh on each shoulder. His hot breath fans against my clothed core and I shiver at the feeling.

“I can see how wet you are baby.” He chuckles darkly, which only sparks another flame within me, causing me to thrust my hips closer to him. He carefully pulls my panties to the side before blowing cool air against my soaked slit. “Jesus fucking Christ.” I whimper, my head falling back when he runs his warm tongue between my folds, collecting my arousal until his lips latch onto my clit.

My wrists tug at the restraint, my body convulsing at the pleasure Dylan coursed through my body. “Fuck, Dylan oh God, just like that!” I cry out, my hips pressing further into his face as he grips onto my thighs for support. His lips and tongue continue their relentless assault, leaving me no mercy as I lose control completely. Dylan hums against my clit, my body twitching at the feeling and my lower abdomen shakes until I finally release with a filthy whine and a string of profanities that sound from my lips.

“God baby, you taste so good.” Dylan sighs with satisfaction, slowly easing my legs back to the ground and my body falls limp. He wraps his arms around my waist, his face inches from mine and I notice my arousal glistening around his lips as it drips down his chin. He wipes it away with the back of his hand before pressing his wet lips against mine and I whimper at the taste of myself on him.

“Fuck me, Dylan.” I whisper into his mouth, my tongue soon following as he returns the gesture. Our lips mesh perfectly whilst his hands find the backs of my thighs again, and he hoists me from the ground, my legs wrapping around his waist and he lines himself at my entrance, slowly pushing through my folds. We both hiss in pleasure whilst he continues to thrust into me, halting suddenly to allow me to adjust to his generous size.

I take a deep breath, pulling out of the kiss and resting my forehead against his before I nod slightly. “Move.” I whisper. He willingly obliges and slowly pulls out before thrusting back into me at a slow pace. He continues his movements for a few more moments until I begin to grow frustrated. “Faster.” I buck my hips against his and he soon copies, thrusting into me at a faster and harder pace.

The chains above my head rattle and clank with every thrust and I moan at the feeling of him filling me up. His tip hits places I never even knew I had, the more his cock buried inside me. “God, you’re so tight.” He grunts in my ear, hands roaming to my ass and smacking his hand against the now, sore skin. I gasp at the feeling, whining filthily with every strike he made, his thrusts becoming faster and harder until I snapped, my vision blurring and I found my arousal, my walls clenching around him.

“Fuck Y/N, oh my fuck!” Dylan cries, quickly pulling out and pumping himself a few times until hot spurts of cum splatter onto my lower stomach. He slowly lets my legs down to the ground again and I fall completely limp. “Holy shit.” He pants, and my vision slowly becomes apparent again. “Dyl,” I breathe, my eyes barely open as I swallow thickly.

Dylan carefully unties my hands, throwing his belt to the ground and catching my body as I almost stammer to the ground. He carries me close to his chest, turning the light out as I snuggle my face into his neck tiredly. “We need to talk Dyl,” I begin as he lays us both on the ground. “We can talk in the morning baby, I have a few things I need to confess.” He tells me, pulling a blanket from the couch and over our bodies.

“Goodnight my love.” Dylan’s soft voice speaks. He presses his lips against mine softly before pulling me into his chest. But that’s the problem… I was leaving tomorrow morning, for good. 

wonder (m)

Originally posted by dear0901

summary: that was the snag, the inconvenience if you will, Jeon Jungkook had next to no experience with girls. It was his best friend that insisted on dragging the poor boy from the safety of his dorm and to the nearest frat party. But now Jungkook no longer attended the parties instead taking refuge on your couch. He’d find comfort there, stretched out upon his back with your legs on either side of his body, your fingers threading lazily through his hair. virgin!kook

word count: 6,028

warning: usual filth, basically sex ed with kook

It’s the way he stares. Eyes almost childlike, shining with an innocence so pure and wondrous. Resisting the urge to indulge in such vulnerability becomes a daily fight because you stare too, except it’s not sheer curiosity that is fuelling you, it’s unadulterated lust. A passionate yearning that has your heartbeat racing and skin setting alight, a fire so intense you ponder on whether or not he’d soothe it or ignite it further.

Keep reading

We Say Hold My Beer

One common moniker of the Humans are Space Orcs idea of this site is that we are the ‘hold my beer’ species.

But what about situations in which someone would actually say “Hold my Beer.”

Challenges.

Not even important challenges of science or honor.

No, stupid challenges. Inane challenges. A situation in which someone is boasting about something with no value to a mass majority, and yet here some idiot stands up, says “Hold my Beer.”, and goes off to one up that boast.

When intoxicated, aliens smartly try to dissuade us, with about a 65% rate of success.

When sober, all aliens know to duck out of the way, because something stupid and/or dangerous is about to take place.

Then imagine Bets. It only makes things worse.

  • Scanlan: Is it a never-ending beer jug?
  • Grog: No, it's not never-ending, it stopped after a bit, but I got plenty fuckin' wasted.
  • Vex: Is it just beer?
  • Scanlan: Is it just beer, or is it any spirit, or what?
  • Grog: No; I said 'mayonnaise' and it started to make mayonnaise and then it stopped, but I think it, like - there's a finite amount of stuff it can make in a day.
  • [Group 'ooh's]
  • Vex: Do you have a jug of mayonnaise now?
  • Grog:
  • Grog: No, I ate that too.
The Rebound

It was supposed to be shorter (; ̄д ̄)

(Also posted on AO3)


Draco ran his finger along the rim of his empty glass absently. The edges of his vision swam as he looked up at the bartender who raised a single perfectly groomed eyebrow at him.

“Another?” she asked.

Draco closed his eyes briefly, squeezing them until they ached, “Bring me… whatever’s next on the menu.”

“Yeah, alright,” she smirked, taking his empty glass, “What did you think about the French 75 then?”

“Nice, lovely,” Draco said absently, not entirely sure he could remember precisely what the last drink had tasted like.

“One Dark n’ Stormy, comin’ up,” she said brightly.

Draco sighed he fished a few more muggle notes from his pocket and shoved it on the other side of the bar. She had been very friendly all night not that he was surprised. There weren’t many people in the bar on a tuesday evening, much less a sad drunk wizard who was likely overpaying a great deal because he honestly couldn’t be arsed to check the numbers on his flimsy paper money.

He ignored her attempts at conversation when she returned and took the tall glass of what tasted like rum and ginger beer. Draco was prepared to stumble through something approximating a conversation when someone sat beside him, ordering a rum and coke and sending her off.

Draco blinked, his brow furrowing, the voice beside him had sounded familiar. Draco turned slowly so his head wouldn’t fall off and found the other bloke watching him curiously. The other bloke that looked remarkably, disturbingly, identical to Harry Potter.

Potter tried on a hesitant smile, “What’s a pretty thing like you doing in a place like this?”

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NHL!Bitty, Part V - Single

The first openly gay NHL player can’t be single in Seattle! 

Since Eric can’t risk telling anyone he has a boyfriend (especially a closeted NHL-er), his only option is to play along as the Schooners go out of their way to find Eric a boyfriend. This wouldn’t be a problem if his well-meaning teammates didn’t keep trying to introduce him to other closeted players, of which there are more than he would have guessed. Now Eric has to survive a night with Kent Parson.

Origin: From Samwell to Seattle | Part I - Hug Check | Part II - Chirping |  Part III - Post-Season | Part IV - RPF 




As the first openly gay player in the NHL, Eric is used to being locker rooms filled with guys bundled up so tight a TSA scanner couldn’t find their genitals; but then there’s stuff like this. Brazen nudity of the ‘I recognize you’re attracted to men, look how cool I am with it’ variety. His new captain leans toward the latter in a way that would make Shitty proud.

“Bittle, we’re going out with a few Aces. You met Kent Parson?”

Mitchell ‘Cricket’ Crocker is pushing 30 and already going gray. He’s also standing in front of Eric’s stall, naked as the day he was born, unconcerned with the fact his junk is at Eric’s eye-level. 

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Pretty

You and him had been friends for years.

Your mothers were best friends throughout high school and college, so naturally you were around each other from birth. You’d seen each other through the good and bad. You were inseparable. He was your best friend, your first kiss (at 12 years old, you both just wanted to see what it felt like and decided to use each other), your other half. Him and you. You and him. That’s the way it always was.

You were often teased by other friends about your closeness with him. Constantly affectionate with one another; kissing cheeks or hugging waists. You never questioned it. He was familiar, comfortable. That’s the way it always was.

He was always a magnetic, it came naturally to him. People just gravitated towards him. He was consistently pulled to you instead. You watched as your crowd of friends cheered him on while he chugged a beer. He glanced around and met your eyes, seeing you sitting at the bar with a full drink. Excusing himself from the crowd, he made his way over to you.

“Oi, love! Wut’re ya doing? Supposed to be getting drunk with me, yeh?”

He’s grinning at you with his perfectly straight smile, eyes cloudy from alcohol while still bright just from their natural color. He was beautiful and that was never lost on you, often having moments of just admiring his beauty. This being one of those times.

You laugh at him. “Don’t think anymore can get as drunk as you are right now. How many in are you?”

“Not even drunk yet, love. I’ve only had 2 beers. I plan to have many, many more and I plan to have them with you.” Raising his hand to catch the bartender’s attention, he ordered another beer for himself. “What’s with ya tonight anyway? You a’right?”

Truthfully, you were just exhausted. Only tagging along on this night out because you couldn’t resist him and his persistent begging. You longed for your sweet, soft cotton bedsheets and 3 fluffy pillows.

“I’m fine. Just tired. Not all of us have massive energy like you.” you reply to him.

He laughs. “Not massive energy, just tryin’ to drink away my problems and what not”

The bartender sits his beer down in front of him. Muttering a thank you, he turns towards me more, “Care to join me?”

You look at him with confusion. What problems could he possibly have? You decide to ignore his comment, you catching the bartender’s attention this time. “Martini, please.”

He smiles at you once again, proud of himself for enticing you to down drinks with him. “There’s ma girl!” he says.

An hour later, it’s past 1AM, and you were both far from sober. Standing outside the bar, holding onto each other for support, you tried to catch a cab home.

“Stooooooop!” He yells at a passing taxi. Far too loud but far too drunk to care. “Neva’ gonna stop for us, love.”

“Wanna just walk? I mean, my apartment is like 3 blocks from here.” You say. You’ve never been one to wait and the cold night air wasn’t helping the waiting situation.

“Sure, let’s gooooooo!” He yells again, grabbing onto your shoulder for leverage.

Him staying in your apartment was never a weird thing. He slept there often, almost more than he did as his own apartment. He even his own side of your bed.

Stumbling into the door, he throws his shoes off by the coffee tables and dives onto the couch. You chuckle at him and heads towards the kitchen for two bottled waters.

“Here drink this, you’ll need it in the morning.” handing him the bottle. He looks up at you with red, squinty eyes and says “What an angel you are.”

You roll your eyes, opening your own bottle to down the cold liquid. “What can I say?”

Suddenly he sits up, looking at you with the tiniest smile. “You look pretty.” reaching over to touch your cheek, “H’ve yeh always been this pretty?” his words slurring together.

You laugh. “Well, I have always had this face.” Without thinking, you lean into his touch. His hand moving more towards the nape of your neck. “Pretty much stuck with it.”

“It’s a nice face, I quite like it.” He trails his other hand down the bridge of your nose. “Like ya lips too. Always ‘ave.” His fingertips running over your cupid’s bow.

You stare at him, observing his actions. “Is that so?”

“D’ya remember when we were 12 and we kissed each other in my room?” He lets out a snort, “Tried to be sneaky because our mothers were just downstairs.”

You remember the memory quite well, it being one of your favorites. You were both so nervous but he did everything he could to make your nerves go away, cracking a joke before it happened to make you laugh. “I remember…”

“Don’t have to be sneaky now, do we?” His fingers now running along the length of your collarbone. Touching you so lightly, you could barely feel it. “We can kiss all we want, can’t we?”

“You are so drunk.” nervously laughing, you pull his hands away from your neck. “Don’t even know what you’re saying”

“I know exactly what i’m saying, love.” He now replaces his hands with his lips. The feeling of them, igniting something in you you’ve never felt before. “Know exactly what i’m thinking too.”

Scared of what his answer may be, you cautiously ask, “What are you thinking?”

Looking you dead on in the eyes, he answers with, “Thinking of how i’d love to make you cum, love.”

Choking on noise in your throat, you look away from his eyes. What is happening? What is going on right now?, you think. This can’t be happening.

You quickly realize that it is in fact happening when he grabs you by the nape of your neck once again and lightly brushes his soft lips against yours. “Let me kiss ya, please…..been dying to all night long.”

Had he really? Your best friend had been thinking about kissing you all night long?

You simply nod your head and his smooth lips are against yours in no time. His lips moving slow, taking his time. You move your hands into his soft hair, tugging a bit as he deepens the kiss.

“So pretty, love…..so, so pretty.” He says after pulling back for air. “Gonna let me kiss you all over? Make you feel good? Make you feel pretty?” His hands running across your chest in a silent plea for permission.

“God, yes. Yes. Make me feel pretty.” He moves his lips to your neck, while his hands lower to your belt buckle. Unraveling it from your belt loops, he pops the front button open, slipping his warm fingers into the band of your underwear.

“So wet already, ‘aven’t even touched ya yet.” You barely have time to be embarrassed before you feel his fingers on your most intimate place. Your best friend. With his fingers in your jeans.

“Don’t tease me, please.” You whine, desperate for him to touch you more. He grants your request, slipping a finger in, pumping slowly enough that you feel the ridges in his middle finger.

You moan. “Thought you were gonna kiss me?” He looks at you with a smug smile, adding another finger as he replies, “Where do ya want me to kiss? Tell me.”

Known for being teasing in general, you don’t know why you didn’t think he would enjoy being a tease in the bedroom. “You know where I want you to kiss me.”

He kisses your cheek. “Here?” He moves to kiss your lips. “Or here?” Moving down to your stomach, “Oh, I know. Right here?”

Bucking your hips towards his mouth, he places a kiss on your clothed center. Earning a moan, he looks up from between your thighs, “That’s the spot, innit?”

“Yessss” you moan, unable to hold it in. “Kiss me there, please.”

“Anything for you.” he says, pulling your dark jeans from your legs, your underwear long with it. He places your foot on his shoulder, kissing the inside of you thigh.

He takes a light lick at first, making you clench. The tip of his tongue giving attention to your sensitive folds, before lowering his head and attached his lips to your nub.

“Shiiiit” you moan once more, giving up at holding them in at this point. “That feels so good.”

He adds his finger back into the mix. Your muscles clenching at the feeling of such pleasure. You were close and he had barely started.

“You taste so good, wanna stay down here for days.” You meet his eyes, and you remind yourself to take a mental image of this moment for future references. He looks beautiful, he looks comfortable, he looks at home between your two thighs.

His finger speeding up, and his mouth attaching to your most sensitive area. You feel the familiar burn in your stomach approaching. “Fuck i’m gonna c-cum, oh my god.”

Sucking even harder against you, he spurs you on, “Come on, give it to me. Cum for me, beautiful.”

You eyes roll back in your head, your ears suddenly going deaf. You can’t hear him, all you can feel is the hard wave of your ecstasy crashing over you.

You feel him pet your forehead as you wind down from your high. Feeling his sweet kisses against your cheek. “Was I pretty?” you ask, grinning lightly.

“Fucking beautiful when you cum, love.” He says, grinning back. “So fucking pretty.”

Playboy, bad boy Kim Taehyung

Originally posted by namjoonie00

Series genre: Smut, angst, fluff

Description: Kim Taehyung, one of the nastiest human beings you have ever been associated with. You despite even breathing the same air as him yet he still somehow finds a place in your life.

note: Park Jimin will also play a major role in this series. Also, this chapter will have some Harry Potter references that are not absolutely necessary to the story itself. Enjoy!

Chapter 1

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