what are you doing get away from the dragon

The fact that the two elf tarot cards are like “fuck clothes” I just like the idea that Lavellan just. Strips. All the time. Gets into camp? Thank god I hate these pants. Walking around Skyhold in a hot day? Shirts are for losers and nerds. Being barefoot makes me a better runner. What do u mean ‘put on a shirt this is an official meeting?’ Im the inquisitor and the inquisitor’s fuckin pajamas are fuckin itchy. Get away from me. I will be half naked and you will like it.

A Plan Gone Wrong

Originally posted by harryismyfirstname

Pairing: Newt Scamander x Reader

Prompt: “You save Newt from a hex.”

Warnings: Reader is hit with a curse

A/N: Idk if I liked how this ended, I might rewrite it later…

Thanks to Mod K for the awesome prompt!!

-Mod E


You were crouching behind splintery wooden crates with Newt, watching the poachers before you shove a squealing baby dragon into a cage. You clenched your fists, hating the way the poachers laughed at the dragon’s misery. They discussed the huge sum of money they were about to get without showing a bit of remorse for what they were doing. You had reached for Newt’s hand, trying desperately to keep yourself from just rushing out into the open and snatching the dragon away from them.

The two of you had a plan; wait for them to fall asleep, then snag the poor caged dragons. But then it all went wrong.

You had leaned forward just a bit, trying to see if there were any other captured creatures when one of the crates shifted, creaking loudly. You froze.

“Who’s there?” One of the poachers shouted. You slowly shifted back onto your heels, but then the crate decided to topple all the way over and crash onto the ground. The poacher drew his wand, creeping up on the stack of crates. Newt put a hand on your shoulder.

“We need to go,” he whispered urgently. “Now. We can come back later.”

You nodded reluctantly, beginning to creep back with Newt. But then the poacher appeared around the boxes.

“Hey!” the poacher whipped his wand, sending a bright flash of red light toward you. It exploded against the ground, right next to your foot, sending a wave of dirt into the air. Newt scrambled to his feet, helping you up with him. You shook your wand out of your sleeve, firing off a quick curse at the poacher. It hit him squarely in the chest, sending him crashing into the boxes. More men began to appear around the crates, growing angry when they saw their fallen friend.

“We can’t let them get away!” One shouted to the others. You fired off another spell, Newt drawing his own wand. He turned to you, holding out his free hand to you.

“Let’s apparate!” he yelled over the explosions of spells. You reached for his arm, but then noticed a hidden poacher appearing from the shadows outside of their camp. He pointed his wand directly at Newt, his mouth curling into a dreadful snarl as he sent a burst of white light toward the Mazoologist. Your eyes widened, your muscles reacting before your mind could fully comprehend what was going on. You lunged in front of Newt, desperately blocking the curse with your own body. You winced when the spell hit, sending shockwaves of pain through you. You fell back, Newt catching you in his arms. And with one last look around, he apparated, holding you close to him.

He landed in the shed of his suitcase, immediately carrying you over to a rough cot. He cleared some books off it, laying you down carefully. His hands were shaking violently, his face absolutely panicked. You had never seen him like this before.

You yelped when another bolt of pain sliced down your back.

“Hold on,” Newt said, going to his cabinets full of bottles and herbs. He rummaged through it, drawing out a tiny red vial. He examined the contents quickly before carrying it over to you.

“Try this.” He flicked the lid off, helping you sit up and take a sip of the liquid. It was cool, like fresh mint. Almost immediately, the spell faded away. It left you dizzy and shaking, soaked in sweat. Newt put a soft hand on your cheek, wiping away a stray tear that tracked down your face.

“Oh, Y/N,” he murmured. “Why did you do that?”

“To save you,” you said, your throat constricting with every word. Newt closed his eyes. You moved your hand to cup his own.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Newt said.

“It’s okay,” you said. “I’ll be fine.”

Newt looked down at your intertwined fingers for a moment, trying to summon up the words to explain the fear that twined through his chest. “I shouldn’t have brought you with me.”

“It was my idea,” you said. “I just didn’t think it through. Besides, this job does come with some danger.”

Newt sighed, standing up. “I know.” He turned around, getting a soft blanket from the top of the cabinet. He unfolded it, tucking it around you securely. Your shivers began to decrease a bit to slight trembles.

“I’m just glad you’re safe,” he murmured.

“What about that dragon, though?” you said sleepily. “He’s not safe.”

“We’ll go back for him when you feel better,” Newt promised. “Next time, with a bit of a better plan.”

You couldn’t help but smile. “Of course.”

8

Year ago I did my first Dorxus comic. I decided to redraw it but I got carried away a little. Thank you for keeping up with me for so long (: 

Anyone else think Dorian might have a hard time with getting accustomed to living in such a big community as the Inquisition? After all, he’s spent quite a long time venturing alone from one place to another. 

anonymous asked:

What blogs do you follow? I am looking for a G-DRAGON but I also like GOT7, EXO, and BTS

I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED!!

Honestly, I’ve been looking for more EXO, GOT7, and Monsta X pages to follow myself, but I can give you a list of my faves. They’re mostly BTS or not groups specific tho. And surprisingly I don’t follow any G Dragon pages. Mostly because he ruins me everyday without following any. I can’t get away from him. He haunts me. I couldn’t handle a GD blog. I would spend so much more time crying than I already do… ANNNNYWAY 

@war-of-hormoan - One of the few blogs I actually visit everyday and not just depend on my dash for updates because her writing and personality are *hearteyes* just my fave and I have to see it all. (lowkey have a huge crush on Ramsey tbh) 

@chanyeolspout - I still can’t properly identify Chanyeol in a lineup of EXO members but AFH is an actual addiction that I’m currently seeking help for. PLUS, she’s just the sweetest person ever. Incredibly thoughtful and friendly. 

@kpoppantydrop - I mean, you probably already follow them, because who doesn’t? They have an abundance my two fave S words. Sass & Sin and they don’t hold back on either. 

@ygentrollment - If you’re a VIP or a Big Bang fan in general you need to follow this blog. Tea is spilled every day and it’s where I get a lot of my most up to date info on the OT5.

@aunttanya and @smuttyassholes - for your daily laugh. 

@memoiresofaneternaldreamer - She’s probably one of my favorite people on Tumblr and I’m so glad she made the mood board for Angels and Demons because if she hadn’t I may have never found her and it would have absolutely been my loss. Plus she’s like a gold mine of inspiration if you’re a writer or enjoy aesthetically pleasing things in general.

@tabi-ears - She’s been posting a steady stream of not just TOP but OT5 that’s gotten me through the past six excruciating years of Tabi’s enlistment. I wouldn’t make it without her probably. Plus she’s really sweet and SUPER GORGEOUS and reminds me of my soulmate so I’m 100% biased. 

And before my list gets TOO crazy, I NEED to mention @smutfictionaddicted a.k.a @writings-by-cl (follow both). - I LIVE AND DIE AND LIVE AGAIN for her Fat Fiction series. It. Is. Not. Done. Enough. I become a complete clutching my pearls, whore in church sweating, box of tissues because it’s so beautiful needing, pint of ice cream gorging because I’m so emotional, hot mess every time I read her stuff. She’s amazing and her body positivity and just positivity in general speaks to my heart and I’m so glad I found her.


*deep breath* I follow like 200 blogs though and I would recommend them all if I could because I only follow really cool, really talented people, obviously. 


Originally posted by rpbfr

  • Gajeel: Oh I do wonder what it must be like to be poor little Natsu Dragon.
  • Natsu: Well, that's not my last name, so the insult doesn't really work.
  • Gajeel: Natsu Dracula.
  • Natsu: No.
  • Gajeel: Drallo.
  • Natsu: Is the word you're looking for "jello"? No, my name isn't Natsu Jello.
  • Gajeel: Drapowski?
  • Natsu: That's getting farther from it!
  • Gajeel: Whatever! Consider yourself insulted and go away!
Companions when out and about
  • Skyrim: ughhhhh omf do we have to keep walking, what, why are you turning around wtf is going on whhhhhyyyyy.
  • Dragon age 2: look at us we can stand in perfect af little triangular formation. We won't move our fcking asses unless you do, Hawke.
  • Dragon age Inquisition: HOLY FCK HOLY FCK WE'RE STOPPING HOLY FCK WHER TF D O I STAND OMFG ON TOP OF THIS BARREL?! NO FCK THE BARREL, HOLY FCK OTHER PARTY MEMBER GET AWAY FROM ME AHHHHHHHHHHHHH INQUISITOR HELP MEEEEEEEEEE
  • <p> <b>Sen, Head Archivist NPC:</b> Do you know how many books this thing has already eaten? Too many.<p/><b>Logan:</b> Sen sheds a single tear.<p/><b>Sen:</b> The time for caution is past. If this thing gets away, how many more books will fall before we catch it?<p/><b>Logan:</b> Friends, Romans, bookhunters. *Laughs* Yeah, let's go get the fucking book! That's what we do, right? There'll probably be a dragon, and we'll get the book from the dragon, and then it'll be fine.<p/><b>Me:</b> There is no dragon. Logan, there isn't going to be a dragon.<p/><b>Logan:</b> Now it is my turn to shed a single tear.<p/></p>

I had a dream last night about werepythons and my datemate and I elaborated on it some and they are now my favorite werething.

  • constantly whining about the cold
  • hunting down warm spots because they are cold-blooded and it is night
  • you cannot take them away from the warm spots. even when they have reverted back to a warm-blooded human
  • “hey what do you want to eat?” “got any rat– uh…ratatouille?”
  • eating eggs. raw. just looking their friend dead in the eye and swallowing raw eggs whole.
  • werewolves revert back and are still a little hairy and fangy for a bit. werepython reverts back and “HAHA LOOK I’M A DRAGON– HEY– HEY LOOK–”
  • instead of getting a wolf trying to hunt you down in the dead of night you have this shitty noodle balling up on your kitchen counter because the toaster is scary

I like to think about Shadow politics and culture and the like. I’ve realized that I’ve been making a list of things to do (or not do) when negotiating with a Shadow dragon. (ie. the entire Lumerae Royal family and a good 1/5 of its upper nobility)

  • Look them in the eye. The purple eyes are a strong reminder of the deceptive nature of the Shadow flight. While well-known dragons can’t get away with the very popular illusions that alter eye color, they can weave spells that divert attentions away from these reminders of what you’re dealing with.
    • If you have difficulty looking them in the eye or remembering exactly what color they were, they’re shady. Be on guard.
    • On the other hand, a Shadow dragon that doesn’t enchant their eyes at all is either very confident, friendly, or both.
      • On the other other hand, it could be a ploy to get your guard down. Stay wary.
  • Keep an eye on the hands, and try to see all sides of them. Forearms too, preferably, but this is much more difficult to do without being blatantly rude. The hands and forearms can conceal weapons and spells.
    • However, most nobility and royalty do arm and ward themselves very well. It is not immediately offensive if there are malevolent runes and spell circles inscribed upon the their skin. Just try to guess the range and trajectory of those spells, and stay out of the way.
  • Inspect jewelry as close as possible, and keep an eye on the number of jewels. Cliché it may be, but some poisons polish to a pretty sheen and also dissolve nicely into most drinks.
  • Watch where the other steps. A Shadow dragon that stays in the open and positions themselves away from as many objects as possible is hiding something, especially if negotiations are expected to take a long time. A Shadow illusionist only uses their solid illusions when contact is inevitable, as these illusions consume much more energy. Solid objects can break or phase through flimsy illusions.
  • Listen very carefully to the wording of any agreements. Know your synonyms and homophones, especially if you’re speaking. Exploitation of loopholes is a Shadow specialty.
  • Watch your mannerisms and be careful to be polite. Shadow dragons are quick to take offense and viciously petty.
    • The clever ones would also use any slight to push the negotiations in their favor.
  • Stay aware of your pockets. Don’t leave important things lying around. If you absolutely must put something out, make sure you keep track of it.
    • That includes living things by the way. Hostage situations are very messy, and the gorgeous entourage might just be taking the focus away from the footpads and soldiers.
  • Try to hold meetings someplace dim. It’s only polite.
  • Never assume you know what a Shadow dragon is talking about when their speech is anything but literal.
  • Actually, never assume anything.

Why is there drama over whether animes are “good” or “too fanservicey” or what. I honestly just don’t really get it. If you don’t like it don’t watch it? I’m seeing this about that dragon maid anime right now, and I’d get it if there’d been hype beforehand and people didn’t feel it lived up to their standards, but it seems that this discussion about it just sprung up at the same time as people heard about it? Why, are people just going out of their way to turn their nose up at a particular product? If people don’t like a particular why do they care, it doesn’t take away from other anime or anything. And if some people enjoy it while others don’t then that’s not a bad thing and people don’t need to go out of their way to show their distaste for them?

(Plus I’ve heard it’s actually pretty okay)

hooded-and-cloaked  asked:

Lavender, silk sheets, dragons!

thank u!!!

Lavender: Name something that relaxes you.

a cup of hot tea rarely fails, and of course snuggling with my cat!!! <3

Silk Sheets: Any ways you treat or spoil yourself?

oof im TERRIBLE for doing this too often haha

usually with nice food, but sometimes with a new bracelet or art supplies that i dont really need <.<

Dragons: What makes you feel powerful, what breathes life into you?

aside from being around moving water, i definitely feel amazing when i get into that sweet spot while drawing and like…the world kind of falls away 

which sounds super romantic but it’s actually kind of exhausting cause i get SUPER intense then!!!! it’s great!!!!!!

Someone Lost His Temper And Is Insulting You (BigBang)

Seunghyun (T.O.P)

Seunghyun wouldn’t be pleased with him walking in on someone screaming at you and insulting you. Especially as he could obviously see that the person had cornered you and that you were looking really scared. So he did what every good (boy)friend would do, he stepped in. pushing the person away from you. “What the hell is your problem, don’t you see that she’s scared?”

Originally posted by ygtop

Youngbae (Taeyang)

Youngbae would stay calm at all times, trying to figure out what was happening with his words, rather than with his actions. Though, of course, he would be mad at the person for screaming at you. It’s never nice to be screamed at. So he would check if you were okay first, taking you away from the person, rather than letting you stay there to get more insults thrown at you.

Originally posted by panda-smack

Jiyong (G-Dragon)

Jiyong is someone to get pretty upset about something like this. There would be no need to insult someone who he cared about, doesn’t matter what you did to them. He would be really mad, though he would try to keep his cool. Trying to get a reason as of why they were being so rude to you before doing anything else.

Originally posted by shabbitable

Daesung

Daesung would just make sure that you would be okay at all times. He is someone to stay really calm under all of this as he knew that getting mad or irritated might only make things worse. He would try to take you away from the problem before talking to the person, or talking with you. As he would also want to know the cause of the problem so he could, maybe, prevent this from happening again.

Originally posted by y0226d

Seunghyun (Seungri) 

Seungri would have no chill whatsoever. He would insult right back, as anyone who tried to mess with someone who he cares about had it coming in his mind. Though the somewhat sassy panda would have to be held back by you at some point. Telling him that this all isn’t worth it. And that it would be better to just leave for now.

Originally posted by jiyongs-g-thong

Tales From IKEA

“I told you, Jean,” Eren said, pulling a radio out of his pocket. He cast a sly look over his shoulder before pushing down the call button with his thumb. “L&F, this is team ramrod. The emerald dragon has been tamed, do you copy?”

“What?” a voice crackled, low and annoyed. “Kirschstein if you left your walkie on the floor again—” 

“What the fuck,” Jean hissed, yanking his radio out of Eren’s hands and shoving him in the direction of the bed. “Make sure he doesn’t run away again while I handle this.”

Jean held the radio up to his mouth and glared at Eren as he spoke. “This is Kirschstein. We found the kid.” He snapped his fingers at Eren, pointing at the bed. 

Eren sighed and walked toward a pine bedroom set sitting on a raised dais, missing the hissed reply that came through the radio.   

He couldn’t believe he was stuck in this corporate wasteland for three months. Before two weeks ago, he’d never even stepped foot in an Ikea. And now here he was, crawling after some booger eating munchkin hiding under item number IZ456D in the children’s section.  

“Hey kid, I see you,” Eren said as he approached the bed.  As he got closer, he kneeled down, so that he could peek under the frame. “I’ll give you credit, you play a mean game of hide and seek, but your mom and dad are worried about you.”

A seven-year old boy with freckles and a red baseball cap gave Eren a toothy grin. “You’re it!” he giggled, grabbing onto the bottom of Eren’s jeans with his chubby fingers.

“I thought we were playing hide and seek,” Eren smiled, reaching down a hand to help the kid out from beneath the bed. 

“Hide and seek, hide and seek!” the little boy shouted and tried to run down the aisle before Eren grabbed the back of his shirt. 

“Hey, not so fast. Snack time with mom and dad first,” Eren said, trying to distract him from running away again.

It seemed to work, because the kid shot Eren another grin before grabbing onto his pants again. “Snack,” he agreed.

They made their way back to Jean, who was busy straightening his nametag and looking like a smarmy dick, reminding Eren exactly why he vowed to make his life a living hell.  When he saw Eren, he scowled. 

“If you steal my radio one more time, Jaeger, I’m going to shove it so far up your ass—”

Eren coughed, jerking his head down at the kid staring at Jean with big eyes.

“Assembly. Your assembly.” Jean finished lamely, shrugging his shoulders. “You need to bring him to Levi.”

“Why me?” Eren whined. “Isn’t this your jurisdiction? I’m supposed to be on inventory with Reiner in twenty.”

“Nope,” Jean smirked. “Erwin said he wanted you to handle it. So you know what to do for next time.”

“Next time?” Eren echoed. Just how often was he going to have to play babysitter?

“Better hurry up,” Jean said.  “Levi hates to be kept waiting.”

JUST LETTING YOU KNOW IM NOT DEAD I DIDNT DIE

I HAVE JUST BEEN CRAZY BUSY YO

BUT I HAVE SOME DRAWINGS LINED UP SO HOPEFULLY I WILL POST THEM HERE SOON OKAY BUT FOR NOW ANOTHER PICTURE FROM OZCON HAVE A VEGETA HES THE PRINCE OF ALL SAIYANS


WHATEVER THAT MEANS

Bias vs the rest
  • *group member does something cute or sexy*
  • Me: AWEE u lil shit i love you can i marry you and have ur babies then marry u again and have more babies
  • *bias does something cute or sexy*
  • Me: What the fucking fuck who do you think you are u alien walrus soggy cheeto lookin ass get away from me I will set you on fire
You’re an idiot.

I spent a nice day at the Barbican Conservatory and somehow got inspired to write this little Sherlolly one shot. I didn’t really intend for this to get so long but I guess I got carried away. Writing little Lizzie was so much fun and I will definitely include her in more stories from now on. Kids can just say anything. That being said, I have no idea how eloquent a child would be at the age of five nor when you actually lose your teeth. I just took the liberty of writing what I felt like :D

The prompt, first and last line are from liathwen-slays-dragons’s list of fic prompts. The prompt was “Do kids really like this” but I guess I strayed a bit from that, but i kept the first line and only added a bit to the last. Enjoy!


“She likes your butt and fancy hair.”

“Sorry?”

Sherlock had stopped abruptly, blinking rapidly as he stared at little Lizzie who casually walked on as if she hadn’t even said a word.

“What did you just say?” he asked her, gently pulling her to a stop at her shoulder.

“She likes your butt and fancy hair,” she repeated looking up at him innocently with her big blue eyes.

Smiling at him she shrugged her shoulders and wanted to walk on but Sherlock halted her once more.

“How would you know?” he inquired quietly briefly glancing at Molly who luckily was out of hearing distance strolling along the path further away.

“Molly said so. She told Mum. I heard them talking. Don’t look confused, Uncle Sherlock. I know you like her, too,” Lizzie replied grinning at him showing off her new tooth gap.

As Sherlock didn’t say anything else she turned around again and resumed jumping playfully along the path between the plants.

Keep reading

  • What She Says: I'm fine.
  • What She Means: What do you MEAN my Warden doesn't get to remain as Commander of the Grey after Awakening? DUNCAN was Commander while he traveled around! He bit the dust at Ostagar, but... I mean, yeah, I know she goes off on an adventure of her own to find a cure for the Calling and everything, but she could still be a commander from far away! She could totally run the Keep from long distance! That's what Seneschal Varel is there for! Like--I mean-- *pounds fist on desk* Goddammit, man. I'm so salty about this. So salty.
y’know iron bull’s dragon fetish?

what if …..

morrigan’s at skyhold and Dorian is always curious about new magic so they get to talking about her shapeshifting

and she teaches him to shapeshift, and he works really hard at it, even though people tease him about it

and let’s say, hypothetically, he learns to shapeshift into a dragon (I mean, Morrigan can)

and he learns how in secret, and tells iron bull one day that he has a surprise for him, and he taks him waaaaay far away from skyhold to like this open field

and bull is like….. um dorian what….

and dorian is like… I know there’s something you’ve always wanted…. and now you can finally have it >:3

and bull is like ????

and dorian shapeshifts into a motherfucking dragon

and bull is like ………………………. YES. …… but dorian are you sure?

and dorian breathes fire in his face and headbutts him with his horns and growls at him until bull takes him like he’s always wanted to take a dragon. >:D

It’s a “Vhyx Has Been Stuck in Pixel Dragon Capitalism Hell for Two Years” Giveaway!

Three winners will get their pick of prizes, the N00B prize, the Sexy Prize, or the Mystery Prize (it is actually a good prize I promise). If you’re a previous follower you will probably get a bonus thing thrown in because I like when people like me. 

Reblog this post with your UN and ID, don’t like this post because it makes my life difficult. The giveaway will end on October 26th at rollover, because that’s Fabios’s birthday. 

Preemptive Answers to Questions:

-What kind of lair review will I get? 

An in-character review from my gay dragon Fabios about your attractive male dragons. Will be SFW, but risque as he can get away with.

-Do I get that imp dragon in the picture?

Nope, but you get the 50k treasure that I once spent on an Imp just like that. Those were dark times when I joined.

-What’s with your MS Paint graphics skills?

I am super lazy. But I still love you all.

-What is the mystery prize?

FUCK OFF THEN IT WOULDN’T BE A MYSTERY!

what do you mean you ate a dragon! Closed rp w/ ask-blogger-miss-prussia

@ask-blogger-miss-prussia

Francine danced around merrily as she and her old friend walked down the path. this was the first time they ever were so far from home. it was either run away for adventure or get betrothed to some man…

the two chose to run for adventure and wound up on the trail headed for white run. the brunette was practically running to look at anything that was new and different. it was so different then when she lived back with the vargas family in the imperial city.