The first time Damian gets kidnapped as Bruce Wayne's son
Thugs over video feed: “Okay man, just remember you have 24 hours to deliver the money or else the kid dies
Bruce: "All right, but first I just want to talk to him please I need to know my little baby is okay *wipes away very convincing Fake Tear™*
*camera pans to Damian, who’s tied to a chair but seems totally chill with the situation and even gives an evil grin when he sees Bruce*
Bruce (yelling dramatically): "OH NO MY DARLING CHILD ARE YOU OKAY??”
Bruce (furiously whispering): “Don’t you dare hurt them do you hear me young man"
"DID YOU GET BOO BOOS?? DO YOU HAVE ANY BROKEN BONES?? OH MY GOD DID THEY TOUCH YOU DID THEY STEAL YOUR INNOCENCE REMEMBER NO MEANS NO DAMIAN YOU NEED TO FIGHT BACK AND STAY STRONG UNTIL WE COME RESCUE YOU OKAY"
"If you try to fight back at all I swear to god you’re grounded for a month when you get back"
"WHAT KIND OF MONSTER COULD KIDNAP A CHILD YOU HEARTLESS FIENDS CAN’T YOU SEE HE’S JUST A BOY"
batman is super sad because his parents are dead, and is either angsting with his alternative universe father, dramatically looking off into the night after parents are mentioned in any capacity, or staring up at a large portrait of them
[barely awake, drooling, 'kill me now' written on forehead]
"jason was the best", batman calls robin "kiddo" and "smart pup", family portraits, batman taking his kid to a baseball game, batman taking his other kid to a rock concert, "i think of dick and tim and my life seems that much richer", batman grieves for his lost children deeply
[tears streaming down my face, cheering, nothing but praise, howls endlessly]
•Aquaman dropping what looks like an unconscious Bruce on a table and proceeding to grab a bottle of liquor, “its on him”
•Barry Allen “you’re the Batman?”
•Diana’s hair flip though
•(while getting into batmobile) Barry “what are you’re superpowers again?” Bruce “im rich”
•(Bruce getting into the batwing like a bad ass) “my turn” oh damn
•Queen fucking Mera and the Atlantians(silently praying Kaldur makes an appearance)
•that small scene of Barry talking to his dad in jail
•Diana landing in front of Aquaman and Cyborg
•that small step back Aquaman does when she lands
•"shall we?“ (Chills and squealing)
•Gordon to Batman "it’s good to see you playing well with others again” AGAIN!! Do you know what that could mean!!!!!
•Aquaman “dressed like a bat I dig it.” Bruce turns to Gordon “may be temporary”
•Aquaman riding on the batmobile “yeah!!”, Bruce smirking like damn right
Jason raised an eyebrow as Alfred adjusted the hair clippers and chose a guard.
“Since when do butlers cut hair?” he asked warily, leaning his thin, 12 year old frame back in the kitchen chair. His hair hung in his eyes when he bent forward but that didn’t mean he was gonna let just anyone chop it off.
“Since Master Bruce developed a paranoid nature,” Alfred replied easily, plugging the clippers in. “Since I tried to take him to a barbershop at age fourteen and he said, and I quote, ‘If you think I’m going to let some stranger near my head with scissors, I’ll throw myself out of the car and shave my head myself.’”
“That sounds dramatic,” Jason said, feeling oddly reassured.
“As is our way of life in the Manor,” Alfred said, sounding a little forlorn. “Come. I won’t nick your ears.”
“What if you do?”
“I shall fling myself from the rooftop in recompense,” Alfred said, turning the clippers on.
“And you wonder where he gets it,” Jason muttered.
Prompt: HI HI HI HI! Can I request a
batmom in which after something dangerous goes down and BATMAN saves her she
kisses BATMAN and the next day all the papers have “ Y/N WAYNE CHEATING ON
BRUCE WAYNE WITH BATMAN?!?” And then they all have to answer questions on
the “affair” and then they have a press conference where Bruce
forgives her for the affair
You cling to your husband as he carries you out of the
warehouse. Riddler is tied up inside, the boys took care of that while Bruce
“Are you alright, Y/N?”
You nod, your face buried in the Batman armor. “’m fine”
“Let me see, sweetheart” he whispers. Setting you gently on
a bench, his cape flares behind him when he crouches down, “You’re alright now.
You nod again, this time leaning forward and pressing a
quick kiss to Batman’s lips. Unbeknown to the two of you, someone had snapped a
photo of that kiss.
The next morning you’re woken up by a series of kisses being
trailed down your spine, “Mmm, babe, no. I’m asleep”
Bruce’s throaty chuckle sounds by your ear, “Obviously not,
love. How’s your cheek?”
“Fine, a little sore, but nothing too bad”
“Good. I know Riddler isn’t the most dangerous villain in
Gotham, but he still managed to get you”
You curl up, nuzzling into Bruce’s chest, “I don’t wanna get
“Neither do I, but the boys are all here, and they want to
see you. They won’t admit it, but you scared them last night”
“Alright, I need a shower, and then we can head down”
Bruce gives you a smirk, “We can always share, save the
“You don’t need to save water! You’re a billionaire!”
The two of you finally manage to get downstairs an hour
“Good morning, Ummi.”
“Morning, Dami. Morning, boys”
Tim looks nervous when he glances at you and Bruce, “Mom,
you might want to come look at this”
He holds out the newspaper article, and the first thing that
catches your eye is the title, ‘Y/N WAYNE CHEATING ON BRUCE WAYNE WITH
BATMAN?!?’ A grainy picture is beside the title, it isn’t clear enough to show
you actually kissing Batman, but both of your faces are close enough for people
Bruce glances over your shoulder at the paper, and promptly
bursts into laughter. You whirl around, “That’s not funny!!”
“Sweetheart, it’s hilarious. We’re going to have to set up
an interview to explain this”
“I’m gonna have to apologize for kissing ‘Batman’ aren’t I?”
Jason chuckles, “Looks like it, Mom. That’ll be funny”
You smack Jason with the newspaper, “Hush, you. God, this is
a nightmare! “
Bruce leans down, his forehead gently pressing against
yours, “Don’t worry … I forgive you for cheating on me”
Everyone’s silent for a minute and then they burst into
laughter, “That’s not funny!!”
“Hey!” He holds up his hands innocently, “I’m not the one
caught kissing a vigilante”
Bruce ends up scheduling an interview with Vicki Vale two
days after the news article was released. The two of you are sitting across
from the Gotham Gazette reporter.
“Thank you for agreeing to meet with me, Mr. and Mrs. Wayne.
I’m sure all of our readers and the viewers here” she gestures to the camera
crew who are filming everything live, “are eager to know what happened”
“The first question I have is for Mrs. Wayne. How long have
you been having an affair with the Batman?”
You straighten up, “I am not having an affair with Batman. I
kissed Batman on the cheek, perhaps relatively close to his lips, in order to
show my gratitude. He had rescued me from the Riddler the night the picture.”
“So you claim that you aren’t having an affair? Mr. Wayne,
do you believe her?”
“Of course I do. It is well known that my company sponsors
Batman, I have met him multiple times. He explained what happened that night
when I contacted him, it is one of the reasons I agreed to this interview.”
“Mrs. Wayne, how did you explain yourself to Mr. Wayne? Do
your children know about this scandal?”
“My children were actually the ones to show up the news
article, so of course they know. I’m positive that they are all watching this
interview right now. As for explaining what happened to my husband, he knew
that a kiss on the cheek means nothing. Bruce knows that I love him, and I know
that he loves me.”
“I will admit, for a split second I feared for my marriage.
However, once everything was explained to me I apologized for jumping to
Vicki Vale raises an eyebrow, “So, Mr. Wayne, you apologized,
but did Mrs. Wayne apologize for causing this scandal?”
“I did, actually. I apologized to my family for making them
go through this nonsense, but to satisfy everyone I will apologize again.” You
turn in your chair, facing Bruce, “I’m sorry for causing such a confusion for
everyone. What happened a few nights ago was not what everyone thought it was.
I would never have an affair with batman … if I was going to have an affair
with a hero it would be with Superman”
After that you quickly walk off-stage, trying to reign in
your laughter at Bruce’s face. You know the next time you see Clark you’re
going to have to apologize, but for now, you’re going to enjoy what you just