what are you capable of

anonymous asked:

Hi. I'm a recently diagnosed 26-year old autistic woman. There seems to be pretty widespread agreement in the autistic community that it's bad to want a cure, but I kinda don't get it? As far as I can tell, autism only contributes negatives to my life. I would love to get rid of the sensory issues, the executive function issues, and the trouble understanding people. I get that it may be impractical to find a cure, but if it weren't, why is it bad to want one?

trigger warning for ableism, eugenics, genocide

I understand.

Autism is a real disability. Some things truly are harder for us. Some things we can’t do. It’s okay to be frustrated by this. Many autistic people sometimes wish that they were not autistic.

Let’s talk about how autism works for a minute. Autism is caused by a “supercharged brain,” with more neural connections and activity (at least, if I am interpreting the research correctly). It is hardwired into the structure of your brain.

You couldn’t remove autism from your brain without ripping it apart. There’s no one “autism part” of your brain. It’s everywhere. It’s deeply ingrained.

There are 2 types of autism cures that people talk about:

  • Fake “cures” sold by scammers (e.g. Miracle Mineral Solution), which may be useless, harmful, or potentially deadly
  • Eugenic cure (creating a test for autism, testing fetuses for autism, and aborting the fetuses that test positive)

(The eugenics movement around WWII posed two more solutions: forced sterilization of disabled people, or killing disabled people, which Hitler did. Nowadays we don’t see many people advocating for these.)

A world without autism would be a world in which you and I are either dead or never given a chance to live.

Realistically speaking… you were born autistic, and you will die autistic. There is no magic pill to ravage your brain and destroy its structure, as that would tend to kill you.

Will humans someday learn how to change the intricate structure of the brain without destroying it? Maybe. I’m not a scientist. But I don’t think we should pin our hopes on a possibility that is unlikely to happen in our lifetimes, and could be very dangerous.

Now let’s talk about attitudes about autism.

Society tends to see autism in a deeply negative light. This isn’t an accident; society is inherently ableist and we have groups like Autism Speaks working to keep it that way.

Ever heard of the social model of disability? It’s the idea that disability is caused by society, not by inability. I always like to describe it using my glasses.

My eyesight is not great. With my eyes, I can’t read clocks, signs, even these words on the screen. My eyes are less capable. There are things my eyes can’t do.

And you know what? None of that matters! I have these magical things called glasses. They level the playing field. I have exactly the same opportunities as my friends with 20/20 vision.

Poor vision is a difference in ability that society accommodates.

Autism is not.

What if nobody paid attention to your stimming because they considered it normal? What if the world was designed to eliminate painful sensory stimuli, and to provide opportunities for sensory seekers to get their needs met? What if meltdowns and shutdowns were seen as normal, and there were quiet rooms in every building where you could go to calm down? What if honesty about one’s feelings were more common? Autism might not be such a big deal then, huh?

The problem isn’t that you were born different. The problem is that society does not adequately support your differences. This lack of support is what defines a disability.

Besides, not all your differences are deficits. Some of these strengths may sound like you:

  • Enhanced pattern recognition
  • Focused special interests
  • Loyalty
  • Better observation skills
  • Helpfulness towards other
  • Superior long-term memory

…and that’s just the beginning. Check out this article for even more.

I’d also like you to read the article “How to Accept Your Autism.” Heck, bookmark it. You shouldn’t have to go through life hating the way you are. Autistic people can be wonderful, capable, caring people. Redefine what success means for you, and work towards goals that will improve your happiness.

(”Being more neurotypical” is a garbage goal. Please take out the trash. You are only going to be sadder if you spend your time comparing yourself to others.)

Here are some example goals that are really good for you:

  • Spend time with my special interest(s) each day
  • Hang out with people who make me happy
  • Eat more fruits and vegetables
  • Get better at recognizing sensory overload, and taking breaks to keep it from getting worse
  • Buying and using some great stim toys
  • Writing down 3 good things that happened today before going to bed

You are good enough the way you are. You are not bad for being autistic. Please stop looking down on yourself. You are worth so much more.

In Defense of Moana's "Shiny"

So, first off, the song does have a lot of Bluthian elements to it, which is a plus in my mind because I love all things Don Bluth.

Second, it’s funny and catchy. It sets a great mood for the monster realm, which is terrifying when you think about it (that mask monster was awesome) but completely understandable to kids.

Third, it’s essential storytelling.

Okay, so a huge theme in Moana is knowing who you are and what you are capable of.

Think about it, Moana’s grandma, her very literal spiritual guide, knows herself so well that she predicts what she will come back as when she dies. She literally tells Moana what she realizes later in the film in the climax of her song, that the voice inside her is who she is. In “Where You Are” Grandma Tala tells her “that voice inside you is who you are.” Later in “I am Moana” Moana declare “The call isn’t out there at all, it’s inside me” which is the turning point in that song and where Moana decides she must complete her mission.

Moana actually continually declares “I am Moana of Montinui” throughout the movie, but when she fails to return the heart, her grandmother mother appears to her and asks her who she is. That’s when we get the most intense reprise of “How Far I’ll Go” in “I am Moana” which literally ends with her shouting “I am Moana.”

Te Ka, the villain, is literally Te Fiti who has forgotten who she is. Moana saves the day by reminding who “This is not who you are, who you really are.”

The solution to the village of Montinui’s problems is to become voyagers again, for, as Grandma Tala says “we’ve forgotten who we are.”

So, what does that tell you? Maui too must face who he is. And as he says regularly “without my hook, I am nothing.”

Maui’s obsessed with his hook. The whole reason Maui and Moana go to Lalotai is to get the fish hook back from Tamatoa.

Now, the great thing about Disney is that it marks important plot points with songs, so we get Shiny. Other than getting the fish hook, what’s so important about this plot point?

We learn why Maui is so obsessed with the fish hook and the issues he must overcome as a character. In a not very subtle way, but in a way that appears to be overlooked because everyone’s thrown off by shiny, we learn that Maui was thrown away by his parents as a child and is driven by his desire to be loved and accepted by humans. It’s later confirmed that the fish hook was given to him by the gods and allows him to do everything he does to get human love and acceptance.

When the fish hook is damaged, he leaves saying more than once “Without my hook, I am nothing.” His turning point as a character is realizing that the fish hook doesn’t make him Maui, even challenging Te Ka unarmed when his fish hook is damaged.

“Shiny” is the beginning of Maui’s character arc.

TL;DR Shiny is great and amusing storytelling that kicks off Maui’s character arc.

Bitchy addendum: Moana is one of Disney’s best movies and it’s way better than Frozen, which is a disaster of storytelling, and Moana deserves way more attention than it gets.

Y’all!!!  OMG. Okay, so Harry is arguably in a padded room when we - and Eggsy and Merlin - find out he’s alive right?  It lends itself to the well loved fandom trope of amnesia (I mean, we already got the eye patch, what else are we gonna be gifted next?!) but the padded room adds a level of violence to the problem.  THey think he’ll hurt someone or hurt himself.

Which means even if Harry doesn’t know who he is, he still probably reacts like a Kingsman when he feels like he’s in danger.  Can you imagine them going to pick him up, to bring him home, and the crew at - wherever he is - is like, ‘you have no idea what this guy is capable of’ and Eggsy and Merlin just kind of smile and nod.

“We’ll take it from here.”

a reminder

that theres nothing “neurotypical” about saying that “your mental illnesses are no excuse to be toxic and to abuse/manipulate your friends/partners”

and yes, this applies no matter your circumstances lmao you dont get a free out of jail card because your unhealthy behavior is caused by symptoms - if someone tells you that your behavior is hurting them or you YOURSELF realize that your relationships arent healthy on your part, its on YOU to

1) communicate with the other person to try to work around it, so that you can see whether your needs are compatible with what theyre capable of giving you in terms of friendship/partnership.
sometimes needs are incompatible, and sometimes relationships dont work out despite mutual (platonic or romantic) affection because there are too many factors that make the relationship more harmful than beneficial - even if its harmful only to one party.

in a relationship, it’s the responsibility of both people to make sure that there is enough communication and safety for people to establish boundaries and voice their needs so that theyre heard. voicing needs doesnt mean that they HAVE to fulfill them even at the cost of their own wellbeing; it means compromising and discussing what can be done so that the relationship isnt draining for either party.

2) apologize for hurting them, take accountability and look into resources to change your behavioral patterns (if it’s a persisting thing). google is your friend. talk with a school counselor/therapist/etc if you have one available for you.
go to a library, see if theres any books on mental health and relationships that might help you out. there ARE resources for mentally ill people and for people who need help at unlearning toxic behaviors caused by trauma or other similar factors. Use them.

trying to opt out of responsibility because your shitty behavioral patterns are caused by trauma/mental illness is you excusing your toxic and/or abusive behavior and at the least makes you an abuse apologist.
it should be obvious why that’s not something the ND tumblr should encourage.

we need to be better and STOP protecting abusers and excusing abusive/toxic behavior under the guise of “mental health positivity/acceptance”

Find someone who loves you well. Someone who never belittles you. Even in the heat of an argument. Someone who is gentle with you, but does not treat you like you are fragile. Someone who knows what you are capable of, and celebrates those pieces of you. Not someone who is intimidated by your strength. Someone who doesn’t make you feel guilty for being flawed. It is not love’s job to punish you. And remember the person you love is just as broken as you are when they fall short. No one is perfect – do not hold them to this standard. Find someone who is patient, forgiving, and apologetic. Someone who practices forgiveness freely and often. Love someone who is humble, kind, and empathetic. Not only with you, but with a beggar on the street, or a stranger in the supermarket. Common courtesy is important. Compassion is important. Kindness is important

5

something vaguely moboween

dunno if this is gonna grow into something else but pls just have this for now

Find someone who loves you well. Someone who never belittles you. Even in the heat of an argument. Someone who is gentle with you, but does not treat you like you are fragile. Someone who knows what you are capable of, and celebrates those pieces of you. Not someone who is intimidated by your strength. Someone who doesn’t make you feel guilty for being flawed. It is not love’s job to punish you. And remember the person you love is just as broken as you are when they fall short. No one is perfect – do not hold them to this standard. Find someone who is patient, forgiving, and apologetic. Someone who practices forgiveness freely and often. Love someone who is humble, kind, and empathetic. Not only with you, but with a beggar on the street, or a stranger in the supermarket. Common courtesy is important. Compassion is important. Kindness is important.
—  Unknown
Dear Men of Letters,

It’s cute that you think you are capable of killing the Winchesters. Just know stronger have tried, and have failed so hard. They beat the creator of monsters in less than a second. Two Princes of Hell are dead. The first demon gone. The final Knights of Hell died at their hands. I am genuinely confused as to why you people think you’re capable of doing what they couldn’t.

shades of wrong (m)

Summary: In which you’re sure you’ll hate Park Jimin with every fiber of your being for the rest of your existence, even after he is assigned your tutor for History of Magic.
Pairing: Jimin | Reader
Genre: Fluff/Smut; Harry Potter AU 
Word Count: 17,321
Author’s Note: This got insanely long, and I apologize but also not really. Inspired by @jeonbegins + her really dope HP Slytherin Jimin AU edit. I also had a little conversation with @minsvga about this and she helped me figured out the basic idea for what this story has become; and @chokemejimin has asked to be tagged in my HP work so here you go my dear!!!

.

No matter how hard you try, it seems as if you are always bested by Park Jimin in every aspect of life: from Quidditch to school to class popularity.

And you absolutely despise him for it.

Granted, it’s probably because he’s always simply excelled in everything while you could only manage the minimum requirement for things outside of the sport you’ve grown to be so passionate about—but that’s only deepened your dislike for the boy. It’s been like this since the pair of you were children, a rivalry already planted between you even before you knew what the term meant. Truthfully, it was pretty much written in the stars that you would develop some deep-rooted grudge against Jimin, for he was organized into Slytherin while you were put in the fiery red and gold of Gryffindor.

Beyond the clashing Houses that have officially formed your backgrounds, it doesn’t help that the boy has seemed to uphold a particular interest in doing whatever he could to see you fidget or watch you squirm or just catch you at your worst moments—although you humor yourself on the idea that these unfortunate incidents occur to you because of Park Jimin’s constant hovering. It’s a habit that’s grown since the first week of your admission into Hogwarts, in which your big mouth scored you your first detention with the infamous Professor Snape.

It’s a moment that marks the beginning of an unspoken battle between the pair of you—in which you would constantly attempt to prove yourself better than Park Jimin and Park Jimin doing everything he could to make sure you could never have that victory. During the first two years of school, this would mean beating you on every exam, knowing the answers to every question and teasing you for not knowing. Professors putting Jimin on a pedestal, marking him up as the ‘ideal student’ and unknowingly intensifying the dagger of hatred you wished to plunge deeper and deeper into his chest.

When you are twelve, you are told that there is certainly no way for you to truly despise of something (or someone)—for you are young and naive and not entirely capable to understand what it means to hate something with every fiber of your being.

But they’re wrong.

Keep reading

Confrontations

Based off of @letkeithinfodump’s lovely Langst post

Do Not Tag As Sh/@nce or Sh/e!th or any other Sh@/adin ships


Lance could feel himself start to shake as Shiro had announced to them who he chose to lead Voltron in case he couldn’t.

It was Keith.

Lance took a breath and balled up his fist. He swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to blink away the stinging in his eyes as he stared at the floor.

Why should he even be surprised? It’s not as though he couldn’t see Shiro’s obvious bias towards Pidge and Keith. He knew that it wasn’t their fault or that they meant to be favored but it stung and he was getting increasingly frustrated at this.

Lance bit his lip before taking another deep breath and trying to calm himself down before catching Shiro’s shoulder when he told them to disperse.

“Shiro? Can I talk to you about something?” Lance asked

“Uh, yeah sure, about what?”

Another breath. “I wanted to talk to you about choosing Keith as the back-up leader.”

Shiro quirked a brow, Lance could tell he was going to have a hard time with this.

“Well you see Shiro…Keith…Keith isn’t a good choice for leader,” Lance had to fight to keep eye contact with Shiro, “you see he’s…impulsive and a hot-head. He’s a nice guy but he’s put us all in danger on numerous occasions beause he didn’t follow an order and he voted to leave Allura behind and-!” Lance could feel his confidence rise but Shiro raised a hand to silence him.

“Lance, I understand your concern but I’ve made my decision already.”

Shiro turned around and left Lance there with his anger festering and his pride hurt even more than before.

He ignored him.

Again.

Lance bit into his lip so hard it felt like it might draw blood. He felt the familiar sting at the back of his eyes and the heat on his neck. He blinked his vision in and out of focus as he felt his body shake with anger.

Lance was the only one left in the console room, so his voice echoed and bounced back to him with just as much disappointment and anger it had when the words left his lips.

You’re not the you I thought you were.”


The next time Lance brings it up is when he’s hardened his attitude towards Shiro’s behaviour. He knows it’s not exactly his fault but the way he brushes Lance off is unacceptable and this time, Lance is Not Having It.

“Shiro.” Lance walked up to Shiro, he rather have missed all of the break between training than have to keep in his feelings.

Shiro turned around and sighed, “Lance, look, I know-” but this time it was Lance who cut Shiro off.

“No Shiro, you look.” Lance took one big breath before starting, “I understand that you are the leader and that you were thrown into this by yourself, but you see, you are extremely biased towards Pidge and Keith and honestly, I just can’t let that stand anymore man.”

Lance paused to see Shiro blinking in stunned silence, he took this as his cue to continue.

“Shiro, I understand that you know Keith the best and probably know what he’s capable of. But your making him stressed because your expectations of him are too damn high and you have to accept that there are things that not even Keith can do- nothing wrong with that Keith, it’s ok that you can’t- but instead you just say “I believe in you” and you tell him to basically change everything about himself so he can act like a good-…no I mean, so he can act like you. Shiro, you can’t expect that to magically fix anything!

Lance took a deep breath and gathered his thoughts before proceeding onto his next topic, “Do you even talk to Hunk ever?”

“Well-” Shiro began

“Outside of giving orders? Do you ever ask, ‘Hey Hunk, how was your day? Did you do anything new?’ Because as far as I know, all you can say to him is ‘Hunk, shoulder canon.’, ‘Hunk, you go with whoever on this mission to retrieve whatever.’, sometimes you can’t even address him directly! It’s just ‘Legs, do this!’ You don’t actually talk to him Shiro.”

“I…”

“Also? Isn’t Allura the technical leader of Voltron? She actually knows Zarkon. She actually knows the aliens that we fight and that we talk to. Why are you acting as though you know this stuff? Even if Allura doesn’t know, most of the time Coran knows so he should also be consulted.”

“Yes, well I-”

“Not only that, but you didn’t consult anyone else when deciding Keith would be the Black Paladin. You didn’t check with Keith on how he felt about that, and even then he told you himself and you ignored it. What’s worse is that you didn’t even consult with your lion, the one Keith would be the pilot of. How do you know if she was okay with this? How do you know if this is what she wants?”

Shiro fell silent, it seems that this was the one that made him crack.

He felt a presence next to him and he fixed his stubborn gaze from Shiro to Keith.

Lance was getting ready to argue with Keith when the red paladin turned from Lance to Shiro and said, “Lance is right, Shiro.”

Lance blinked confusedly as Keith continued on, “You don’t listen to him at all. Remember the Blade of Marmora? You didn’t listen to Lance, and I nearly got myself killed. Granted, I wanted to go but… the point still stands.” Keith crossed his arms as he finished his argument.

Lance felt a warm hand on his shoulder as he looked to see Hunk sending him an appreciative look before agreeing with the fire and ice paladins.

One by one, everyone from the Team Voltron stood behind or near Lance and agreed with him.

“Shiro.”

Shiro looked up from the linoleum tiles, seemingly ready to get criticized once more.

“What do you say?”

Shiro closed his eyes as he took in a deep breath before opening them once more and looking around the small group of people. “…and all of you feel this way?”

There was a small murmur of agreement and short little nods.

Shiro sighed, “You’re right Lance. I wasn’t thinking about anyone else but my own beliefs and bias.”

He turned to the two alteans to his left.

“I’m sorry for not consulting you on matters I know you would have more knowledge on. I…I tried to think that just because I lead Voltron I know everything but…not really.”

Shiro continued on down the line of paladins.

“Lastly, Lance…I’m sorry. You were right and….I was ignoring you. Thank you for pointing this out to me and…I know it was probably hard but…I’m proud of you.”


About two weeks later Shiro went to the Black Lion and asked if she would be willing to pick a backup to pilot her in case something happened to Shiro.

She said yes so, all the paladins (+Allura and Coran) would stand in front of her and allow her large, wisdom filled eyes to scrutinize them.

When Lance stepped in front of her he felt as though every crevice in his mind and soul was being checked and scrutinized. Before long, the Black Lion’s eyes started to glow.

She did it. She found her back-up paladin.

Lance.

Hunk’s and Pidge’s cheers could be heard in the background as they whooped and hollered at Lance.

Lance felt waves of pride crash over him, before feelings of anxiety and guilt replace them.

But what about Blue?

Lance looked to the Alteans, knowing that the other paladins wouldn’t be able to fill out his spot without creating a new spot in Voltron needed to be filled. He played with the idea of Blue Paladin Allura, and while she could certainly fill out the spot with ease, he knows that she’s the pilot of the castleship, and if her was honest, that was a lot harder to replace than the pilots of Voltron.

Before announcing his decision he used his connection to the Blue Lion to ask her about if that was okay or not. She said it was fine so long as it wasn’t permanent and she could have Lance back. Lance smiled, Don’t worry my lady, you’re my one and only. He told her before turning to the alteans.

Coran.”

“Yes, Lance?”

Will you be the back up Blue Paladin?

Carousel | 04

Character: Min Yoongi x reader (oc)

Genre/words: Angst, Implied/light Smut, Arranged Marriage! AU / 14,844 words

Summary: He is the successor of his family’s business empire, and you are the female heir of yours. After the trouble his older brother had created in the past, he now must face certain requirements needed for the sake of the family’s future and to save his rights of inheritance, and you become his only way out. Everything might seem so simple, just the way they are supposed to. But everything isn’t always what it seems, is it?

Playlist | 01 | 02 | 03 | 04

Cr.


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