what are we gonna do on the bed

RANDOM SENTENCE STARTERS

Following my AUs and Prompts List from a few months back, here is a compilation of my favorite sentence starters for all your writing needs.

Because most of them aren’t mine, credits are at the end.

SHORT

“Marry me.”

“Do you want me to leave?”

“You are not going without me.”

“I can’t believe you!”

“I swear it won’t happen again.”

“What did you say?”

“I’m not jealous.”

"You’re jealous, aren’t you?”

“We can’t keep doing this.”

“Are you sure this is legal?”

“Isn’t this amazing?”

“I’m going to take care of you, okay?”

“Stay the night. Please.”

“You can’t die. Please don’t die.”

“Run away with me.”

“You did WHAT?”

“Quit whining.”

“Get outta my sight!”

“Why are you so annoying?”

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

"Never in a million years.”

“Don’t ask me that…”

“I might have had a few shots.”

“What’s with the box?”

“W- What are you doing?”

“Say it!”

“I could kiss you right now!”

“Are you done with that?”

“What’s going on here?”

“Stop pinning this on me! You started it!”

“It’s your fault we’re in this mess.”

“Did you do this on purpose?!”

“Kiss me.”

“Are you still awake..?”

“Excuse you?”

“This is all your fault!”

“I can’t believe you dragged me into this.”

“Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!”

“I shouldn’t be in love with you!”

“It’s not fair!”

“I could kill you right now!”

“Knock it off!”

“Screw you!”

“You’re a complete moron!”

“I love this song!”

“I can’t be in love with you!”

“Make me.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

“I hate you.”

“You are infuriating!”

“Just shut up already.”

“That doesn’t even make sense.”

“Bite me.”

“Eat me.”

“Kiss my ass.”

“Just admit I’m right.”

“Just admit you’re wrong.”

“You are being ridiculous!”

“That’s irrational.”

“Listen to me!”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Don’t yell at me.”

“That’s it. End of discussion.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You shouldn’t have said that.”

“Fuck you!”

“Shut your mouth before I shut it for you.”

“How dare you?”

“I dare you!” 

“It’s you, it’s always been you.” 

“Well this is awkward…”

“Just pretend to be my date”.  

MISCELLANEOUS

“Are you really gonna leave without asking me the question you’ve been dying to ask me?”

“The planet is fine. The people are fucked.”

“I just did some calculations, and I’ve been able to determine that you’re full of shit.”

“You know what I like most about people? Pets.”

“Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”

“What about a compromise? I’ll kill them first, and if it turns out they were friendly, I’ll apologize.”

“I don’t hate you.. I just don’t like that you exist.”

“Love is the jelly to sunshine’s peanut butter. And if I tell you that I’m in sandwich with you, I’m not just saying it to get in your Ziploc bag.”

“Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.”

“Did you really just insult Captain America in front of me?”

“Can I touch your boob?”

“It’s not that you’re wrong, exactly, you’re just extremely not right.”

“You shouldn’t be trusted with small children, should you?”

“Give me cake or give me death.”

“On a scale from, ’I can sometimes make important phone calls without crying’ to ’I have a stable job with a steady income, a spouse who loves me, a dog, and two kids who are screwed up minimally at worst’, how much of an adult are you?”

“You think I’m dumb enough to fall for that stupid move?”

“Despite the cliche, it’s not me, it’s you.”

“Obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t.”

“No, it was my fault for thinking that you might care.”

“When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Specially then!”

“If you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are we doing anyway?”

“I think I’ve been holding myself back from falling in love with you all over again.”

“What have I told you about the toilet seat?”

“I tried to change the duvet and I got stuck inside.”

“I vote today to be a pajama day.”

“You have to tell me why were committing a felony before we do it. Not that that’s going to stop us, but at least I’ll have all the facts.”

“I don’t leave messages. If I wanted to talk to a machine, I’d talk to my VCR.”

“I can be flexible. As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.”

“You know we’re suppose to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you, and you know it, too. I know you do.”

“Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”

“I’m not going to apologise for this. Not anymore.”

“What I hear when I’m being yelled at is people caring loudly at me.”

“I am NOT crying, okay?! I’m allergic to jerks!”

“This would not happen if I had a penis!”

“That’s almost exactly the opposite of what I meant.”

“All nighter, you and me. First one to fall sleep buys the other dinner.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever played spin the bottle.”

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.”

“I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

“To the night you’ll never remember!”

“Excuse me, did the 12:15 bus come by already?”

“Could I sit here? All the other tables are full.”

“Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.”

“You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”

“It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”

“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his/her cake hole.”

“I’m not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren’t even hot.”

“You better take care of that car or I swear I’ll haunt your ass!”

“This is the dumbest thing you’ve ever done.“

“It’s a real shame nobody asked for your opinion.”

“I could do that, but could doesn’t mean would.”

“You cannot fathom the immensity of the fucks I don’t give.”

“You’re like, five feet tall. How you gonna reach me, shortie?”

"I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”

“Do you need me to kill someone for you?”

“Look out where you’re going, asshole!”

“Fuck the sandwich guy!”

“I did not mean for stripping to come out of this.”

“The whole street is blocked off. The police won’t tell us anything, but I think there’s been some kind of attack… Maybe a bomb?”

“Oh my god, are you okay? I’m calling the police. I think I saw who did this to you.”

“I’m weird, you’re weird, we could have weird little babies and live weirdly ever after if it wasn’t for the fact I find you repulsive.”

“There is nothing wrong with planning a wedding with a video game character.”

“I’m gonna lay down and die for like half hour okay?”  

“There’s been some real friction in our friend group lately. I suggest an orgy to save our friendships.”

“It’s midnight, what do you want?”

“I think I know how to use a bed.”

“If I wake up in the morning and I’m dead… Wait.”

“You are completely unfit to handle a child.”

“We have to get out of this place. It is EVIL.”

“Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”

“When in doubt curl into the fetal position and give up on life.”

“It’s not a double date, we’re just third and forth wheeling.”

PREGNANCY

“I have something to tell you…”

“I think I’m pregnant.”

“I’m pregnant!”

“When were you going to tell me that you’re pregnant?”

“You’re smart and successful with an adorable belly.”

“$50 bucks says it’s a girl/boy.”

“Pregnancy suits you…”

“Hello little one. We can’t wait to meet you…”

“I’ll just be in the bathroom throwing my fucking guts up because our unborn kid wants to be a dick!”

“There’s someone I’d like you to meet…”

“Shh… He/she’s sleeping..”

“I have a special surprise for you. Close your eyes and follow me.”

“No, no, no, no, no, we aren’t ready… We aren’t ready for kids yet!”

“Oh, gosh, I felt it! I felt a kick!”

FLUFF

“Your hair is so soft…”

“You’re so cute when you pout like that!”

“Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.”

“I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.”

“What, does that feel good?”

“HA! I found a weak-spot on you, didn’t I?”

“Are you wearing my shirt?”

“You are ridiculously comfortable…”

“I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…”

“You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…”

“You’re beautiful, you know that?”

“We should get a puppy!”

STARGAZING

“Aren’t they beautiful?”

“These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.”

“Shooting star, make a wish.”

“It’s actually a comet, but I’ll still make one.”

“Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.”

“Never thought something so beautiful could exist in nature…”

“Wouldn’t it be cool to name a star after yourself?”

“Y'know, your roof may not be the safest place for us to stargaze.”

“This is why you made me drive three hours out into the middle of nowhere?”

“Is that a– Wait, no, just an airplane.”

“I wouldn’t mind falling asleep out here.

FLIRTY/SUGGESTIVE/SEXUAL

“Did you just… finish?”

“They always make shower sex sound so appealing, but honestly, this is getting dangerous.”

“I’m not actually feeling anything.”

“Are you getting any closer?”

“Why do they make this look so easy in all those porn movies?! This hurts like fuck!”

“Did something just happen? You’re not turned on anymore.”

“Shit sorry, am I going too fast?”

“Wow, you’re hot.”

“Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

“Hey, I’m open minded.”

“Keep sweet-talking and this could go a whole new direction.”

“I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.”

“I’m gonna be honest with you. I’m really horny, and you’re really hot. Can we fuck? Like, now?”

“I see someone’s happy to see me.”

“I saw that. You just checked me out.”

“You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.”

“Take off your clothes.”

“Tell all those other guys/girls you don’t need them ‘cause you got me.”

“Don’t give me that face, it’s so cute I might not be able to hold back.”

“Boobs are really just squishy pillows.”

“If you don’t get turned on by having your neck kissed somethings wrong with you.”

“Blasphemy! Sex solves everything.”

“I platonically want to have sex with you. No big deal.”

TEXTS

[text]: What do you want now?

[text]: Do you want to bet on that?

[text]: Guess who just got back in town.

[text]: So I might be in a hospital right now…

[text]: We can’t keep doing this anymore!

[text]: Come on, come to the party!

[text]: Can you pick me up from the bar? Too drunk to drive.

[text]: You have no clue how I feel so shut up.

[text]: I call bullshit.

[text]: You thought you could get away with that, didn’t you?

[text] I gave up great shower sex to be here so don’t say I never did anything for our friendship.

[text] Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.

[text] Also, my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall.

[text] Who says no to sex and donuts?!

[text] I know what you did last summer…

Sources: x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

AUs no one asked for
  •  I’m sleeping over at my friend’s flat from university after study group and just got woken up in the middle of the night by their roommate, who is sitting in the kitchen, listening very loudly to the dirty dancing soundtrack and crying. Like wtf, I didn’t even know they had a roommate and normally I would yell at you but damn you are cute. You really need to stop tho dude, its 4am, some people in this house want to sleep AU
  • I am a barista and you are a customer who comes in every day and orders the same thing and today my friend brought you with them, I didn’t even know we had mutual friends and WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT IS NOT ACTUALLY YOUR NAME HAVE I REALLY BEEN WRITING A NAME THAT IS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO YOURS ON YOUR CUPS FOR OVER HALF A YEAR WHY HAVE YOU NEVER CORRECTED ME AU
  • The house party me and my friends threw kinda escalated and after throwing out everyone I found this half naked person passed out in my bed but I can’t be bothered to wake them up now so I’m just gonna go to sleep and deal with it in the morning, they are kind of cute anyway AU
  • (or alternatively) I just woke up in a stranger’s bed and I’m half naked, I cant remember anything about yesterday besides that the party was great and that I got absolutely wasted AND OH MY GOD THERE IS A HOT PERSON NEXT TO ME IN BED AND THEY ARE NOT WEARING MUCH WHAT DID WE DO YESTERDAY AU
  • You are my new coworker and I’m pretty sure I’ve never met you SO WHY ARE YOU LOOKING SO FAMILIAR FUCK I THINK YOU ARE ONE OF THOSE ANGSTY EMO KIDS I USED TO STALK BACK IN THE MYSPACE DAYS I CANT BELIEVE THIS AU
  • We work out at the same gym and you are my declared rival because we have the same workout routine and you are always better than me and on my way to the locker room I passed you in the shower where you were singing the opening of hannah montana and I can still hear you and you switched to the lion king now and even though I hate you I think I am kind of in love with you AU
  • I’m hiding in the bathroom of a restaurant from a spectacularly awful tinder date and you are in a similar situation because a guy at the bar just won’t stop hitting on you and now we are planning an epic escape together even though we only met ten minutes ago AU
390 Prompts!!!!

1. “A wedding?”
2. “After everything you did, you’re asking ME to apologize for snapping at you ONCE?”
3. “Am I supposed to be scared of you?”
4. “Are you drunk?”
5. “Are you hitting on her for me?”
6. “Are you kidding me? We’re not ‘fine’!”
7. “Are you okay?” “Why do you ask?” “You’re wearing two different shoes.”
8. “Are you really taking his side against me?”
9. “At what point did you think that was a good idea?”
10. “Babe, you have a problem, please, let me help you.”
11. “Be my wife.”
12. “Before I do this, I need you to know that I have always loved you.”
13. “BOOM! That oughta show you not to mess with me!”
14. “But the carnival is right down the street! Can we please, please go!?”
15. “Can I kiss you?”
16. “Come back to bed.”
17. “Come on, let’s throw the dice, see what happens.”
18. “Come over here and make me.”
19. “Come with me.”
20. “Could you be happy here with me?”
21. “Crocs? Who hurt you so much in this life?”
22. “Damn. You clean up good.”
23. “Delete that immediately.”
24. “Did I just say that out loud?”
25. “Did I stutter?”
26. “Did you enjoy yourself last night?”
27. “Did you hear that?”
28. “Do you…well…I mean…I could give you a massage?”
29. “Do you ever stop eating?”
30. “Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they’d lock us up?”
31. “Do you ever think we should just stop this?”
32. Do you like me? Check yes or no.
33. “Do you need me to get anything from the store?”
34. “Do you think it’s possible that I…might be… pregnant?”
35. “Do you think she could have loved me?”
36. “Does he know about the baby?”
37. “Don’t fucking touch me!”
38. “Don’t say that. Not now.”
39. “Don’t say you love me.”
40. “Don’t you dare throw that snowba-, goddammit!”
41. “Don’t you ever do that again!”
42. “Either ask her out or I will do it for you!”
43. “Excuse me, I’m terribly lost. Can you help me?”
44. “Everyone deserves a second chance.”
45. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy.”
46. “For some reason I’m attracted to you.”
47. “Frankly, I couldn’t care less.”
48. “Fuck…I feel I’ve been hit by a car.”
49. “Game’s over you son of a bitch! Tell me where she is!”
50. “Give me 5 bucks, I’ll explain later.”
51. “Go on then, tell me. Tell me you don’t love me.”
52. “Go then, leave! See if I care!”
53. “Guess who’s going to be a father?”
54. “H-How long have you been standing there?”
55. “Have I entered an alternate universe or did you really just crack a smile for me?”
56. “Have I ever lied to you?”
57. “Have you ever wanted to hate someone?”
58. “Have you lost your damn mind!?”
59. “He’s missing, not dead.”
60. “Hey! I was gonna eat that!”
61. “Hey, have you seen the..? Oh.”
62. “Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always.”
63. “His ego is so visible, I can almost watch it grow.”
64. “Hold me back!”
65. “Hold my hand dammit, we gotta make this look convincing!”
66. “How about we put the gun down and let’s talk about this?”
67. “How could anyone be that cruel?”
68. “How dare you!?”
69. “How long has it been?”
70. “I almost lost you.”
71. “I am not losing you again!”
72. “I beat you at Mario Kart and now you’re banishing me to the couch for the night?”
73. “I came here to explain what happened, and I’m not leaving until you listen.”
74. “I came home to a Nerf gun on the front porch and a note that says ‘Here is your weapon. I have one too. Loser cooks dinner. Good luck. xo’”
75. “I can manage on my own.”
76. “I can’t… I can’t lose you.”
77. “I can’t believe you talked me into this.”
78. “I can’t explain right now, but I need you to trust me.”
79. “I can’t get you out of my head.”
80. “I can’t let you do that.”
81. “I can’t start over again.”
82. “I can’t stop thinking about you.”
83. “I can’t swim!”
84. “I choose you.”
85. “I could never leave you, I love you too much!”
86. “I did a pregnancy test.”
87. “I didn’t ask for any of this!”
88. “I didn’t know you could cook.” “Oh, trust me I can’t.”
89. “I didn’t know you could sing.”
90. “I didn’t know you were so competitive.”
91. “I didn’t realize I needed your permission.”
92. “I didn’t think it was even possible for you to be so intelligent.”
93. “I don’t care what he said, it doesn’t mean jack squat.”
94. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you.”
95. “I don’t know why I’m crying.”
96. “I don’t snore, do I?” “Like a chainsaw.”
97. “I don’t want to have a baby.”
98. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
99. “I don’t want to let you down.”
100. “I got you a present.”
101. “I guess I was wrong about you. You’re not so bad after all.”
102. “I had a nightmare about you and just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
103. “I had to see you again.”
104. “I hate you!” “No you don’t.”
105. “I hope one day you’re as happy as you’re pretending to be.”
106. “I just need you to do this one thing for me.”
107. “I just really need to have you here right now.”
108. “I just want this.”
109. “I just want to be alone right now.”
110. “I just wanted you to know that when I picture myself happy… it’s with you.”
111. “I know, but… I love him. You can’t give up on a person you love.”
112. "I know, but he’s your partner for this.”
113. “I know that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it”
114. “I love you.” “I know.”
115. “I love you. I’ve loved you since the moment I first laid eyes on you and – Oh, screw it!”
116. “I love you a lot, but please stop trying to cook me dinner, you suck.”
117. “I love you for you, don’t you dare think otherwise!”
118. “I love you more than anything in this world… which is why you have to stay here.”
119. “I love you, you asshole.”
120. “I made a mistake.”
121. “I may be an idiot but I’m your idiot.”
122. “I may despise you with the burning white hot intensity of a thousand suns, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”
123. “I may have… ripped my pants.”
124. “I miss her so damn much, and it’s killing me that she’s gone!”
125. “I need you to forgive me.”
126. “I never believed in soulmates until I met you.”
127. “I never learned how to whistle.”
128. “I never meant for anyone to get hurt!”
129. “I saw you staring at each other, I just wasn’t sure if it was sexual tension or murderous rage.”
130. "I see the way you look at me when you think I’m not looking.”
131. “I swear if you weren’t so attractive, I’d have punched you in the face nine times by now.”
132. “I swear it was an accident.”
133. “I swear it was like that when I found it!”
134. “I think I picked up your coffee by mistake.”
135. "I think I’m in love with you and that scares me to death.”
136. “I think we need to talk.”
137. “I think we should have another.”
138. “I think you’re just afraid to be happy.”
139. “I thought you were a dream come true.”
140. “I thought you were dead…”
141. “I trusted you!”
142. “I waited and waited, but you never came back.”
143. “I want my best friend back.”
144. “I want to go back to before….”
145. “I wasn’t going to wait around for you forever.”
146. “I wasn’t planning on asking you, but I’ve come to realize that life is short. Will you marry me?”
147. “I wish I could hate you.”
148. “I won’t give up if you won’t.”
149. “I won’t let you fall.”
150. “I-I can’t trust you anymore.”
151. “I’ll be right over.”
152. “I’ll sleep under the sheets, you sleep on top of them.”
153. "I’m flirting with you.”
154. “I’m freezing!”
155. “I’m laughing because you’re angry. I swear I didn’t do it!”
156. “I’m like 20% sure this plan will work. The other 80% means we could die horribly and violently, but honestly it’s a really solid plan.”
157. “I’m not good enough for you.”
158. “I’m not happy here.”
159. “I’m not surprised that you murdered him.”
160. “I’m not the only one who thinks that.”
161. “I’m only human!”
162. “I’m pregnant.”
163. “I’m sick of being USELESS.”
164. “I’m so happy you’re alive.”
165. “I’m so sorry! I will never doubt you again!”
166. “I’m so stupid to make the mistake of falling in love with my best friend.”
167. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
168. “I’m sorry, but I can’t trust you anymore.”
169. “I’m sorry if this upsets you, but I’m going to marry her.”
170. “I’m sorry, run that by me again.”
171. "I’m sorry, what were you saying? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”
172. “I’m starting an idiot jar. Any time you do or say anything idiotic, you have to put at least a dollar in it—more depending on how stupid the thing that you said or did was.”
173. “I’m tired of being your secret.”
174. “I’m up to the challenge.”
175. “I’m yours.”
176. “I’ve been in love with you my entire life.”
177. “I’ve got good news and bad news.”
178. “I’ve moved on.”
179. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before… and it scares the shit out of me.”
180. “I’ve seen the way you look at me when you think I can’t see you.”
181. “If he’s going to treat you like shit, I’m going to kick his ass.”
182. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to seduce me.”
183. “If I die, I’m going to haunt your ass.”
184. “If I ever see you anywhere near her, you’ll have to deal with me!”
185. “If my parents knew what I was doing, they’d kill me.”
186. “If this is love, love is easy.”
187. “If you die, I’m gonna kill you.”
188. “If you don’t want to talk about what happened, then say so. Don’t just lie and say it’s fine.”
189. “If you keep looking at me like that we won’t make it to a bed.”
190. “If you shove cake in my face this will be the worst wedding night of your life.”
191. “IF YOU USE UP ALL THE HOT WATER ONE MORE TIME, I’M GOING TO BAN YOU TO THE COUCH FOR A MONTH.”
192. “If you walk out right now, it’s over for us.”
193. “If you walk out that door, you’re no longer one of us. You’ll be one of them and that means I’ll treat you like one of them.”
194. “Is… is that even possible? Like, can we do this?”
195. “Is… that my picture in your wallet/as your home screen?”
196. “Is it really you?”
197. “Is it supposed to look like that? Are you sure?”
198. “Is that a challenge?”
199. “Is that an apology?”
200. “Is that real?”
201. “Is that what I think it is?”
202. “Is that what you’re doing? Trying to make me to hate you?”
203. “Is there a problem?”
204. “Is there a special reason, as to why you’re wearing my shirt?”
205. “Is there something you want to tell me?”
206. “It could be worse.”
207. “It made a difference to me.”
208. “It must be hard with your sense of direction, never being able to find your way to a decent pickup line.”
209. “It was just a dream.”
210. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like that.”
211. “It’s a hobby of mine to prove you wrong.”
212. “It’s all your fault.”
213. “It’s been fun. We’ve had a good run, but you parked in my spot. I’m going to have to kill you now.”
214. “IT’S NOT COMING OFF!”
215. “It’s not what it looks like…”
216. “It’s okay, I’m here for you.”
217. “It’s okay to cry…”
218. “Just leave me ALONE.”
219. “Just talk to me!”
220. “Keep your head up.”
221. “Kiss me.”
222. “Let him go! It’s me you want.”
223. “Let me buy you a drink?”
224. “Let’s do something wild and crazy!”
225. “Look at me - just breathe, okay?”
226. “Look at that. I’ve never seen your face get so red.”
227. “Look, I don’t have much time, but I wanted to say I love you.”
228. “Looks like we’ll be trapped for a while…”
229. “Make a wish.”
230. “Marry me?”
231. “May I have this dance?”
232. “Meet me at midnight. Alone.”
233. “Meet me on the bridge in an hour.”
234. “Meet me on the roof in ten minutes.”
235. “Mind if I cut in?”
236. “My parents asked about you.”
237. “No! I’m tired of doing what you say!”
238. “No one needs to know.”
239. “No one will ever hurt you again.”
240. “None of this makes sense.”
241. “None of that matters now.”
242. “Not a day will go by that I won’t think of you.”
243. “Oh, my God! You’re in love with her!”
244. “Please don’t argue. You have to leave right now, you aren’t safe here.”
245. “Please don’t cry.”
246. “Please don’t do this.”
247. “Please, don’t give up on me.”
248. “Please, don’t leave.”
249. “Please listen to me-”
250. “Please say something.”
251. “Please, take me instead!”
252. “Promise me you won’t let anything happen to him.”
253. “Promise me you’ll stay.”
254. “Remember our first date? When you took me to Starbucks and it took me 15 minutes just to choose a flavour of Frappuccino? I was never sure about anything, never. But I was so fucking sure about you!”
255. “Run, and don’t ever look back.”
256. “She’s been missing since Friday and you’re not worried?”
257. “She’s missing, not dead.”
258. “Shit, are you bleeding?!”
259. “Shopping? Do I have to go?”
260. “Shut up and kiss me.”
261. “Since when do you drive a motorcycle?”
262. “So? It’s not your problem so butt out.”
263. “So, I found this waterfall…”
264. “So there was an accident…”
265. “Somebody’s in love!”
266. “Sorry, I thought I was alone…”
267. “Stop taking pictures! I’m fucking stuck. Be useful and help me!!”
268. “Stop talking about love for a minute and help me with this bullet wound.”
269. “Stop talking about the past, I could be dead in a matter of hours… make me up a future.”
270. “Teach me how to play?”
271. “Tell me a secret.”
272. “Tell me again why I let you convince me that this was even remotely a good idea.”
273. “That came out wrong.”
274. “That guy at the bar keeps staring at you.”
275. “That is not coming in this house!”
276. “That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!”
277. “The joke’s on them.”
278. “The paint’s supposed to go where?”
279. “The sign said not to push the button, so naturally I had to push it!”
280. “The skirt is supposed to be this short.”
281. “The three seconds rule doesn’t apply to sticky foods.”
282. “The way you flirt is shameful.”
283. “There are plenty of people out there who love you.” “Yeah, like who?” “Like me.”
284. “There’s no getting out of this. You ruined me.”
285. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
286. “Things don’t always turn out how they should.”
287. “This is… this is somewhere I never imagined I’d be.”
288. “This is by far the stupidest plan you’ve ever had. Of course I’m in.”
289. “This is so going on YouTube!”
290. “This isn’t just about you. It’s about what’s best for all of us.”
291. “Those things you said yesterday… Did you mean them?”
292. “Time’s up!”
293. “Twins? We’re…we’re having twins?!”
294. “W…Was that you making that noise?”
295. “Wait a minute. Are you jealous?”
296. “Wait, do you two know each other?”
297. “Wake up! Please, please wake up.”
298. “Walk it off!”
299. “Wanna bet?”
300. "Wanna dance?”
301. “We could be amazing!”
302. “We could’ve had it all.”
303. “We have to pretend to be married.”
304. “We missed our chance.”
305. “We’ll finish it the same way we started it…together.”
306. “We’re in the middle of a thunderstorm and you wanna stop and feel the rain?”
307. "Well….don’t keep me waiting”
308. “Well, this is awkward…”
309. “Well, this is where I live.”
310. “What are you afraid of?”
311. “What did I ever done to you?”
312. “What other hidden talents do you have?”
313. “What the hell are you doing here?! I told you I never wanted to see you again!”
314. “What the hell was that?!”
315. “What were you thinking?? Were you trying to get yourself killed?”
316. “When are you going to realize that I don’t care?”
317. “When I come back, that better be exactly where you found it!”
318. “When you love someone, you just don’t stop. Ever. Even when people roll their eyes or call you crazy… even then. Especially then!”
319. “Where did that cat come from?”
320. “Where did you find this?”
321. “Where did you learn to dance?”
322. “Where were you? Do you have any idea how worried I was?”
323. “Who brought pot brownies to the bake sale?!”
324. “Who gave you that black eye?!”
325. “Who’s gonna stop me? You?”
326. “Why are you baking muffins at three in the morning?”
327. “Why are you covered in mud?”
328. “Why are you dressed like that?”
329. “Why are you lying?”
330. “Why are you up so early?”
331. “Why can’t they see that they’re meant for each other?”
332. “Why can’t you see what you’re doing to me?”
333. “Why choose me?”
334. “Why do I even bother?”
335. “Why don’t they just kiss already?”
336. “Why don’t you say that to my face?”
337. “Why wouldn’t you come to me with your problems?”
338. “Will you just shut up for a moment so I can say something nice to you!”
339. “Will you please just give me a hand?”
340. “You are nothing like them.”
341. “You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
342. “You better have a good reason for waking me up at the ass-crack of dawn.”
343. “You braided his hair?”
344. “You broke what?!”
345. “You came back!”
346. “You can trust me.”
347. “You can’t just sit on the sidelines your whole life!”
348. “You can’t leave me in the dark. You have to tell me these things.”
349. "You can’t protect me.”
350. “You deserve so much better.”
351. “You did all of this for me?”
352. “You did this for me?”
353. “YOU DID WHAT?!”
354. “You didn’t tell me it was karaoke night…”
355. “You don’t have to stay.”
356. “You don’t know you the way I do.”
357. “You don’t need to protect me.”
358. “You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”
359. “You got her pregnant?! What were you thinking?”
360. “You had me at ‘free pizza!’”
361. “You have no idea what I’ve done for you.”
362. “You have the most amazing eyes.”
363. “You have to make a choice.”
364. “You have to remember!”
365. “You haven’t even touched your food. What’s going on?”
366. “You heard me. Take. It. Off.”
367. “You know I wouldn’t do this if I had any other choice.”
368. “You know my name?”
369. “You know, it hurt when I realized that you’re not in love with me. But nothing can compare to the pain I felt when I saw you fall in love with him…”
370. “You know, it’s okay to cry.”
371. “You lied to me!”
372. ″You look beautiful.”
373. “You make me feel like I’m not good enough.”
374. “You need to leave. Right now.”
375. “You need to let her go.”
376. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.”
377. “You never told me you had a fucking twin.”
378. “You say the nastiest things when you’re angry, so yes, I’m walking away from you now.”
379. “You shouldn’t have even been there!”
380. “You walked away. Not me.”
381. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
382. “You’ll be the death of me.”
383. “You’re hiding something from me.”
384. “You’re my one exception.”
385. “You’re not alone.”
386. “You’re safe now. I’ve got you.”
387. “You’re the only one I trust to do this.”
388. “You’re too good for me.”
389. “You’ve got to be kidding me!”
390. “You’ve only heard his side of the story. You never asked mine.”

keith, stressed, lying in bed watching the cealing : i mean, my dad was human and my mom was galra. then who am i? what does that even makes me? i’m some weir-

lance, doing his night time skin care routine, looks at him for a second: you’re just mixed.

keith:

lance: like me, i’m mixed too. I’m afro-cuban. You are…humra? galuman…

keith: *starts to smile a little, relaxing himself*

lance: garhum!! humgarl??? ugh we need to work on it. you NEED to have a nice identity name! i’m gonna give you a cool name, keith!! i swear!!

sentence starters: misc. romantic tension !

  • ❝ I just think you’re really special. You deserve special things in your life. ❞
  • ❝ I mean, anyone would be lucky to date you. ❞
  • ❝ Thief, I can tell you’ve been using my soap. You smell just like it. ❞
  • ❝ So… How do I look? Like if we were about to go on a date, what would you think? ❞
  • ❝ This is a little weird, but… Would you kiss me and see how this chapstick tastes? ❞
  • ❝ All I’m saying is, I’d prioritize your orgasm over mine. ❞
  • ❝ I covered your bed in rose petals for science. Take a look and tell me if it’s too much. ❞
  • ❝ I’m kinda scared my kissing skills suck. Would you… Y’know. Practice with me? ❞
  • ❝ How weird is it that our heights make our crotches match up perfectly? ❞
  • ❝ Pull my hair again and this is gonna get real awkward real fast. ❞
  • ❝ Sorry I, uh… Walked in on your alone-time. I swear I didn’t see much. ❞
  • ❝ Dinner’s on me if you please, please rub my back. ❞
  • ❝ Your morning wood poked me, it happens. Doesn’t have to be weird or anything. ❞
  • ❝ I sorta had a bad day. Just cuddle up with me for a little while, please? ❞
  • ❝ You deserve so much better than this. If you were mine, I’d… ❞
  • ❝ I almost feel like you belong to me, like you’re my own personal person. ❞
  • ❝ Is it weird that I always miss you more than I miss my actual girlfriend/boyfriend? ❞
  • ❝ I can tell you’re pissed off. Just lie back, I’ll dish out my famous shoulder massage. ❞
  • ❝ Can we kiss? I just really need to be kissed right now. ❞
  • ❝ You’re welcome to stay, but remind me why I’m the little spoon in my own bed? ❞
  • ❝ I wish I could bottle the way you smell and sell it for a fortune. Nothing compares. ❞
  • ❝ What happened to your hair? Hold still, I’ll just… Fix it for you. ❞
Writing is Hard, part 6: SEX

Summary: Dean and the reader have sex. Finally. FINALLY.

Read Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Warning: Smut

Word Count: 4250ish

A/N: This is all written with love for fan fic. I’m teasing, not putting it down in any way. And the quotes are from my own Faking It series, in case anyone was curious. Hope you enjoy! (Sorry, tag list is closed!) XOXO


“You knew he didn’t quite understand why you found it so hot, but Dean had never seen himself leaning over the engine in a tight, sweaty t-shirt, hands and forearms covered in grease as he worked.”

Dean’s outside working on the Impala, and you’re reading fics about just that. Apparently, Dean working on the Impala is the hottest thing to ever grace the fandom (aside from his lips…and his green eyes…and his cocky swagger that is really just hiding adorable and unnecessary insecurity…and Jesus, these people are thorough), and you’re curious. In your actual experience with Dean, working on the Impala is just a nuisance. You have to wait longer to get on the road, Dean takes forever to scrub himself clean afterward, and for the next few hours, everything smells like metal and oil covered up by motel soap. Why do people find that so hot?

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Normal Horoscope:

Aries: You dream of things that eat up all your dead skin while you sleep. This is the natural cycle of things. 

Taurus: As you sit, leaned against the wall, know that you are being watched by something hungry that thinks you’re its mom. That’s also where the rabbit heads are coming from. 

Gemini: Find your weaknesses. Skin and eat them. You will become unstoppable.

Cancer: It is easy to be disdainful of problems you have solved. It’s hard to fix them for someone else.

Leo: Life is a series of groundbreaking accomplishments fueled by rage and exhaustion, and recovering from those accomplishments.

Virgo: Defend what is yours. Defend what is theirs. Grab a rifle and get involved with the community.

Libra: Movement is impossible with balance. See the world, fuck shit up.

Scorpio: Rage at the world is impotent and useless. Rage at the self is excellent, you can change that guy and what else do you have to do with your time?

Ophiuchus: I see you there, nose turned up at the screen. Feel the confusion wash through your head. Say nothing. Ask nothing. Enjoy it.

Sagittarius: A light in the dark is no soft beacon. All can see you now. Hold your weapon ready. 

Capricorn: We figured out how to go to war for non-violence. You want an uncomplicated life? Go be a plant. Seriously, that would be awesome plants are chill.

Aquarius: Eat something today. Do it in defiance of all the things keeping you pinned to the bed. If you’re gonna go out, do it with a finger up.

Pisces: The stars said nothing today, but they sang the lyrics to “Dare to be Stupid”. So there you go.

Strip Tutoring // Jeff Atkins // requested

Request : please do a jeff atkins imagine but please dont let him die there iM BEGGIN U

This imagine doesn’t mention his death or the party or anything! Just a regular ‘dating Jeff Atkins’ imagine. Lol

Requests are closed. xx

Warnings : not really smut but… stripping ?…. cheeky!Jeff

Pairings : Jeff x Fem.Reader

Originally posted by jeffreysatkins

Originally posted by ardevaas88


Walking into the library, my eyes scanned over everyone’s faces until I saw my boyfriend sitting with Clay. He looked irritated and pinched the bridge of his nose. Taking a seat at the table, Jeff’s eyes lit up.

“Hey babe.” He smiled. 

I grinned, “How’s he doing, Clay?”

“Depends. Did Abraham Jefferson write the Declaration of Independence?” Clay responded smartly. 

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Lust & Errors 01 (AU) | Jungkook x You

Rated: M

Warning: Dom themes, very light dubcon and inappropriate step sibling stuff. Be warned.

Summary: Step brother, fuck buddy… They were one and the same now. But what started out as some mindless fucking game, quickly turns into something much more difficult and complex.

Note: No words other than can y’all tell how fucked up I am by now? =D  Anyways, this is going to be a little mini series. :) It was originally supposed to be just a oneshot, but I thought of a cool story, so yeah. I’m tired so I’m not editing tonight lol.

Words4,393+

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05.


It was wrong, you knew it. He knew it. But you couldn’t bring yourself to stop. It was like an addiction - each of you the other one’s drug. The situation itself wasn’t right, but it also wasn’t fair either. You and Jungkook had been hooking up before your father and his mother decided to get together. It wasn’t that big of a deal until they made the decision to tie the knot and ultimately labeling you and your fuck buddy as future siblings.

However, the engagement didn’t stop your encounters, nor did the actual marriage which officiated the fact you were supposedly ‘brother and sister’ now. You fucked every chance you got. After school when your parents were still at work, in his car when you two would drive to some abandoned parking lot with the notion of 'going to bond’ - but your encounters usually ensued in the middle of night while your parents slept, peacefully oblivious to the sins happening under their very roof.

You would tiptoe silently through the house until you made it to Jungkook’s room. You wouldn’t knock, you would simply open the door as quietly as you could so you wouldn’t wake your sleeping parents. He’d be waiting for you in the nothing but his boxers and you’d greet him with nothing on but your panties and one of his white t-shirts that swallowed your small frame. When your parents asked what you were doing with your brother’s shirt on in the many mornings they found you wearing it, you’d innocently say that it was cozy and they wouldn’t press you any further about it.

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Goodnight Texts: ReggiexReader! Oneshot

Hey guys! I dunno, I had this idea but I’m not too happy with how I executed it in this oneshot. More oneshots will be coming soon so sorry if this is bad!

Summary: (Y/N) can’t sleep so decides to text her boyfriend Reggie. This slowly turns into a mini sexting session.

Warnings: NSFW, I guess? Allusions to smut. Cussing.

Originally posted by joeck

(gif not mineeeee)

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so you didn’t get the grade you wanted. so you didn’t get the boy you wanted. so you didn’t get the job you wanted. so what do you do now? well, you think your world is ending but the truth is, you’re gonna wake up tomorrow morning. and maybe that’s what scares you the most: that even when bad things happen, we have to keep living. we don’t get a break. a day where we can sit and sulk. we have more living to do. we have more tests. we have more people to talk to. we have to get out of bed and go to work. but that’s the thing: there’s a whole world in front of us. and it breaks my heart to see people in their early twenties or even younger thinking their world is over because they didn’t get the grade or the boy or the job they wanted. don’t you see? there’s going to be more tests. there’s going to be more boys. there’s going to be more job opportunities. you’re not stuck. you can dig your way out. failure isn’t wrong; it’s inevitable. but we try again, and maybe again, and maybe again, and eventually, we will succeed. and it will be worth it: when you’re graduating college and falling in love with someone who’s right for you and working a job you love. you have so much time to get it right. i mean it. you don’t have to get it right right away. you’re not falling behind. you’re learning. you’re growing. you’re blossoming into the best person you can be. wait for them: the person you can be proud of. they’re coming.

The Case of the Bed Stranger

Stiles/Derek, T, 1.5K words, College AU

Written for the following prompt: The house party me and my friends threw kinda escalated and after throwing out everyone I found this half naked person passed out in my bed but I can’t be bothered to wake them up now so I’m just gonna go to sleep and deal with it in the morning, they are kind of cute anyway AU


“Erica,” Derek says calmly—very calmly, he thinks, considering the situation. It’s two in the morning, he just trudged back from the library with a pounding headache behind his eyes, and he comes home to find their apartment the site of a raging house party, with drunk undergrads everywhere.

“Hey, Der,” she says, with that wide grin that only comes out when she’s had one drink too many.

“You didn’t tell me you were throwing a party,” he says, his jaw clenched, and she scoffs.

“This? This isn’t a party. This is a, uh, just a little get-together.”

Derek rolls his eyes. “It’s finals, for fuck’s sake. I’m going to bed, at least turn the fucking music down.”

He pushes through the crowd—accidentally hitting some of them with his backpack, oops—and finally seeks refuge in his room. The noise is dulled, blessedly, when he shuts the door behind him, and he exhales, letting his eyes fall shut. His momentary calm evaporates, however, when he opens eyes and notices the very important fact that someone is currently asleep in his bed, sprawled out on his stomach like he owns the place.

All Derek can see is broad bare shoulders, messy brown hair, and half of a mole-dotted face, pressed into the pillow and currently slack with sleep. Huh.

Derek sighs. He’s fucking exhausted, he doesn’t want to deal with babysitting some drunk kid right now, and he really doesn’t want him to wake up and then throw up in Derek’s bed or something.

Plus, the traitorous little voice in his head says, he’s really cute.

Derek shakes his head, irritated, as he drops his backpack on his desk chair. He strips down to his boxers and skips brushing his teeth—he’ll do it twice in the morning, and people are probably fucking the bathroom anyway, Jesus Christ.

Derek pulls back the comforter and gently slides into the bed, trying not to disrupt the mattress before he realizes that he’s being ridiculous. Why is he even considering a stranger’s comfort? It all seems for naught, anyway, because this kid apparently sleeps like the dead.

He takes a quick peek under the blankets, and at least the guy’s still wearing briefs, thank god. Derek doesn’t want to have to worry about accidentally sexually assaulting someone in his sleep.

He flops over onto his other side—thanks to the king size bed, his only grad school indulgence, there’s plenty of room—and closes his eyes. He’ll deal with this shit in the morning.

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Conversations you’ll most likely have with Wade Wilson

(A/N): I haven’t written one of these in forever but then I was thinking about it and Wade showed up in my mind so take this lil thing


“(Y/N), I was thinking, what if we made our own chimichangas?” 

“Do I trust you enough in my kitchen to do that?”

~

“If I figured out how to do an upside down Spiderman kiss would you willingly participate?” 

“Wade, the last time you tried you fell and broke your neck, we’re not starting this again,” 

~

“Wade Wilson a sub, huh?” 

“Don’t mock me, I can tell you’re mocking me,” 

~

“(Y/N), my skin hurts, it all hurts,” 

“I’m so sorry Wade, I don’t know- I don’t know what to do to help,” 

~

“I was once told I looked like an avocado had sex with another avocado,” 

“Well…that’s creative…” 

~

“Wade, we’ve been over this, you don’t have to hide behind a mask when you’re around me,” 

“I’m afraid one of these days you’re gonna wake up and realize how much I look like a monster,” 

~

“One of these days I want you to meet Eleanor, I think she’d really like you,” 

~

“I swear to god Wade if I wasn’t dating you you’d be dating Peter,” 

“I don’t think Tony approves of me so I’m going to have to say no to that statement,” 

~

“Aren’t they so beautiful?” 

“Wade, it’s 3 in the morning, who are you talking to?” 

“The readers,” 

“The who?”

“Nothin’, just go back to bed,” 

~

“God bless america!” 

“Wade, you’re canadian, stop with this nonsense,” 

~

“Why do you love me?”

“Because you’re beautiful inside and out, plus, who else is going to put up with my crazy,” 

~

“You’re insecure, don’t know what for-” 

“I look like a volcano exploded on the moon that’s why,” 

~

“Your ass is lookin’ fine today Wade,” 

“Trust me, I know,” 

~

“Wade we have spent almost a grand in mexican food this month,” 

“So I’m guessing that if I asked for tacos tonight you’re gonna say no?”

~

“Oh my god Wade! Don’t ever do that again!” 

“(Y/N), I’m fine, really, It’s just a little scratch,” 

“Wade your arm is actually missing shut the hell up,”

~

“If you ever so casually chop your fingers off again I swear I’m going to withhold sex from you for a week,”

~

“Did you know I love you?”

“Mhm,” 

“The voices in my head love you too,” 

“…Wade what the hell,” 

~

“Wade this is so gross, I can’t do this,” 

“Come on (Y/N) just stitch me up and I’ll be good as new- If you throw up into the gaping hole in my chest I will never forgive you,” 

~

“Wade I feel sick and If you don’t stop trying to pet me with that broom I swear I’m going to rip your hands off,” 

~

“I can’t believe you tried to use a fucking tide pen-” 

“I was young and inexperienced god,” 

~

“I think I got the suit wet with my blood and now I can’t get it off of me and I need help,” 

~

“So I may be a little late tonight, I’m kinda in the middle of somethin’,” 

*Casual sounds of screaming and gunshots in the background*

“Fine but I’m not making your chimichangas so you’re going to have to pick them up,” 

~

“I like you better without the mask,” 

“Do you now?”

“Yeah, You got a pretty nice face,” 

~

“I’ll love you till the end of time,” 

“Well you keep up with all this vigilante shit your time is running out buddy,”

“So…do you love me back or what?”

~

“If I have to come pick you up from a disappointed Fury one more time I may never take you out for food again,” 

~

“We don’t deserve you,” 

“Yeah you do buddy,” 

Louis is the only omega to ever make it in the cut-throat world of competitive motorcycle racing—that is, he would be if anyone actually knew about his identity. Now, his sights are set towards competing in—and winning—the European Grand Prix, the biggest and most difficult race of the entire year, so he can disappear underground for good. He’s close enough, too, until an alpha sports journalist is assigned to follow Louis’s every move as he prepares for the event of his career.
Or, an AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

“I don’t even know who he is, Niall! I just want to know his name or some - ” 

“So why do you keep fucking blushing while talking about him!” 

“You know what, fuck off! I’m gonna find him myself!”

or, The morning after his party Harry wakes up naked on his bed, and there is a Polaroid photo of a stranger right beside him. Harry wants to know who is this tiny little boy that has soft fringe and a smile from heaven. He has endless hope.

The study was to see if two strangers could live together for a month and fall in love.

“We are a new organization working to prove that love can do extraordinary things.”
“You will do everything together & you are not allowed to leave the resort for the whole month.”
“We want to prove that opposites attract.”
Louis is allergic to peaches, Harry smells like peaches.
Louis just came for the money.

It’s June 2013, and the legalization of gay marriage is the most discussed political issue in the country. As a member of parliament Louis Tomlinson has decided to do everything under his power to keep marriage between a man and a woman. Little does he know a boy with green eyes and pink lips from his past is on a mission to change his mind.

Leaflet for Over Again Inc. 
“In relationships, there are three types of people: those who are happy, those who are unhappy but accept it and deal, those who are unhappy and in denial.Handling this last category is our job: we are professional couple breakers.To reach our goal, we use all means necessary.”

Or the Arnacoeur AU in which Harry is scheduled to be married to Liam in 10 days and Harry’s mother hires Louis and his team to break them up.

What happens when an unstoppable object meets an immovable force?

[Space AU. Louis is an astronaut. Harry works for Mission Control. They don’t get along.]

It’s a long plane ride to LA but sitting beside Harry makes time fly.

Louis was staring at him, expecting a response, and Harry was supposed to be the one coming up with that response, and he was so not prepared, so he blurted out the first thing that came to mind.
“Where were you? You weren’t on the bus for a few days.”
Louis raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“Uh… Sorry, I just- Um, sort of noticed that maybe you weren’t on the bus since last week. Not that I watch for when you’re on the bus or anything. That would be weird. Obviously, you have your own schedule, and I have mine. I just saw that you weren’t here, so I wondered what you were doing, or if something bad happened, like you got kidnapped or something. God, that sounded creepy. I promise I’m not threatening your life or something. Jesus, just stop me. If you have pepper spray, I would totally understand if you got me in the eyes right now.”
Louis had his lips pressed together at this point, holding back a laugh. Harry really didn’t blame him for that.

Or, the one where Harry just really wants to talk to Louis. And when he finally does, everything he says just comes out wrong.

Harry’s one of Hollywood’s biggest actors, has made a name for himself in prestigious films and lives the life of a superstar. There’s just one thing missing to make it picture-perfect, but the one Harry’s in love with is completely out of reach for him. Enter Louis, one of Hollywood’s biggest actors himself, who just came out of the closet and taps new genres in the industry. When Louis sacks the role Harry auditioned for in Scorsese’s next big film, their irrational feud starts. Who could have guessed it would get even worse when for promo season, their teams decide to present them as a couple for publicity?

In short, Harry’s in love with someone and doesn’t care about dating anyone else, Louis never felt home in L.A., Liam writes love songs for someone he shouldn’t write love songs to, and Niall makes everything better with good food.

“I hate frats,” Louis repeats for what feels like the millionth time.“Yes, I’ve heard, once or twice or every day for the past three years,” Liam says. His careful tone reminds Louis of how his mom always sounds when one of his siblings is on the brink of a tantrum.Louis glances speculatively at Liam’s frat brothers, who are still huddled together and chatting, with the exception of the one who’s looking in Louis’ direction. Maybe Louis shouldn’t rule out a tantrum. While making a scene wouldn’t actually free him from fraternity nonsense in the future, it would at least be entertaining.

AU where Louis hates fraternities and would never be into a frat boy. And one of these things is definitely not a lie.

Louis doesn’t get out too much due to his shyness. The only two friends he has he met online and they both live miles and miles away. Then along comes a cute bartender that completely flips Louis’ life upside down.

Louis Tomlinson has just landed his dream job, coaching soccer at Augustus University. When he moves into a new house near campus, he meets his very fit new neighbor, English professor Harry Styles. Although their first meeting leads to an instant mutual dislike, the more Harry gets to know Louis, the more he likes what he sees.

Or the one where Harry’s African grey parrot spills his dirty secrets to his very hot neighbor.

Aspiring writer and all-around office gopher Harry Styles is desperately trying to establish himself as a hard-hitting journalist at the famous men’s magazine M™. When his editor-in-chief asks for a last minute volunteer, Harry jumps at the chance to write his first real assignment.Suddenly, Harry is tasked with writing a 10-day, exclusive, personal feature on roguishly handsome rising star, Football darling, and pain-in-the-arse diva Louis Tomlinson’s coming out. Harry just wants to write his story. Louis isn’t going to make it easy. Oh bloody buggering fuck.

“I hope our paths will ‘croissant’ again.”
There’s a little smiley face drawn next to the words, and it’s ridiculous, Louis knows, but he can’t help the swell of butterflies that he feels as he reads over the words once more. 
An odd fellow indeed, he thinks.A moment later he shakes his head and collects himself, because he really does need to get home; he’s sure that Harry is probably watching him from behind the counter, all sweet, smug smiles and pink cheeks. And if he’s being honest, he’s not entirely sure he won’t toss his groceries into the trash and walk straight back into the bakery if he doesn’t leave now, so… he really does need to get going. Before he goes on his way, though, he plucks the note from the top of the container and carefully tucks it inside of his wallet to protect it from the rain.That’s how it begins.

Harry hums, staring at his hands in his lap, and Louis can still feel their smoothness, how solid they were in between his own. “Do you think it’s the same for us? Are we here only because of the likeliness of our jobs? Of our lives?”
“We’re here because we have inventive managers,” Louis says, giving Harry’s leg a little nudge with his knee, but all that’s going around in his head is, I think I’d be in the same spot in every possible universe.

Or, when actor Louis Tomlinson used to daydream about dating Harry Styles, this is not what he had in mind.

AU. Louis Tomlinson is trying desperately hard not to fall for his son’s au pair, but he can’t, for the life of him, remember why.

[475. The hope that this fear is unfounded.]

They walk slow, unhurried, and they talk about everything, the earth and the glaciers and themselves, little bits and pieces. Harry finds himself falling open, caving in like the crevices that run like cold veins from the icy lakes. It feels strange to talk this way. He feels like he should be having this conversation hidden under his covers, whispering in the dark. It feels like the kind of talk that means too much, that means trust and revealing the small things that make up the bigger ones, except they’re both barely blinking an eye.

Or Harry is a WWF journalist with big dreams and Louis is a glaciologist that flies helicopters for fun. Greenland is an odd place to spend Christmas, but just maybe, the perfect place to fall headfirst into love.

“Somewhere between chaos and control — these are the wonderlands.”
Harry’s daughter, Andy, is signed to Louis’ girl band. Her path to success is marked by competition, chaos, and for Harry, a love affair.

Monsta X reacting to their best friend (crush) asking to sleep in their bed with them

A/N: Guess who took ages to make this! Yes, me :(  Still, this is for a wonderful anon who made the request. I hope you like it and sorry for taking so long.


JOOHEON:

He would try to look super chill about it, and make some jokes as an ice breaker he would think it’s a good oportunity to have a late night conversation with you, but when you finally fall asleep he would be terrifyed to touch you because he wouldn’t want you to think he’s actually taking advantage of the situation.

Jooheon: be careful, Y/N, I move a lot in my sleep, you might end up on the floor.
You: can you just shut up and let me sleep, Jooheon? I’m tired…
*a couple of minutes later in the dark…*
Jooheon: Hey, Y/N are you still awak- *accidentally touches your boob*
You: LEE JOOHEON WHAT THE FUCK!
Jooheon:

Originally posted by jo0heonie

WONHO:

He would be super nervous and start making a million scenarios in his head, as he wouldn’t be sure if you just wanted to sleep in his bed, or sleep with him. So he would just pull the typical Wonho move, play it cool (and collapsing in an embarrassment breakdown 2 seconds later).

You: Wonho… Would it be awkward if we slept together?
Wonho: No at all… Pfff… Wait a second, though. Do you mean sleep, sleep, or sleep sleep, because if it’s the second one…
You: Wonho, for God sake… I’m literally just gonna close my eyes and pass out. Chill, boy. What did you have in mind?
Wonho: Me??? Nothing… Of couse I knew you meant that… *sweats*

Originally posted by monsta-x-cuties

HYUNGWON:

This little savage would try to act like it’s not big deal while he would actually be so happy inside because he’s gonna have the chance to have you sleeping in his own bed. He would still try to hide his true feelings for you.

You: Can I sleep in your bed tonight? I’m too lazy to go back home.
Hyungwon: Of course not. I’ll give you a blanket, you are sleeping on the floor. 
You: HYUNGWON!
Hyungwon: Okay, okay… You can sleep here but you have to do it on your side because I’ll only give you 20cm of my bed, so good luck trying to fit in.
You: CHAE HYUNGWON!
Hyungwon: OKAY THEN. God, why are you so greedy?

Originally posted by minyeossi

(Just to make the feels rise a little more, Ik he would stay awake till you fell asleep so he could stare at you BYE)

MINHYUK:

Oh this boy is everything but shy. He’d be glad you asked and he’ll be lowkey (and by lowkey I mean HIGHKEY AF) trying to getas close as he can to you, just being his clingy self. He’d take it as an oportunity to have a taste of the kind of relationship he wants we you but he doesn’t have (yet).

You: So… I can stay the night here?
Minhyuk: Yeah, that’s my side right there, you can have the other one.
You: Okay… Now I have a side…
Minhyuk: Of course you do. That’s how it works…
Both: *get in bed*
You: Hummm… Minhyuk… can you please go to your side, you are technically over me…
Minhyuk:
(you are Jooheon)

Originally posted by wonhontology

(THE SOFTNESS IS REAL, IM DEAD, BYE)

Keep reading

~College!au Pen Pal Jungkook~ PART FOURTEEN:END

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6] [part 7] [part 8] [part 9] [part 10] [part 11] [part 12] [part 13]

Originally posted by jkguks

“Revenge?” You inquired with a smirk as he dragged you out of your room. 

“Come on. We have to make her feel bad, you know?”

“Aren’t we supposed to be the bigger people?” You raised an eyebrow. Stopping in his tracks, he sighed. “Aren’t you mad about what she did?”

“Oh, definitely.”

“Then, for once, just this once, for your…boyfriend, can you agree?” He drawled out the word ‘boyfriend’ as if testing it out and then nodded in satisfaction.

“Boyfriend, huh? I don’t recall you asking to be my boyfriend,” you looked around, aimlessly.

“But Y/N,” Jungkook whined, shaking your hand in his grasp.

“Yes?”

“I’ve already told you I love you and I’ve kissed you,” He peered down at you with a raised brow. When you nodded, motioning him to continue, he shook his head as a chuckled released from his lips. “Now, all that there’s left is the question. Will you be my girlfriend?”

“Sure, I love you, too, so it’s very clear that’d be my answer. Now, what were you thinking for revenge?”

“That’s it? A ‘Sure’? You know what, I should’ve expected that,” He laughed.

“Did you expect me to jump into your arms oh so gracefully and give you a kiss?”

“I mean, that’d be nice,” Jungkook shrugged with a cheeky grin. Rolling your eyes, you stood on your tippy-toes and pecked his cheek. He pouted but nonetheless walked along. 

“So, girlfriend, my plan of revenge is messy,” Jungkook smirked, leading you to his dorms.

“You’re not gonna call me that always, right? I like the sound of it but do we want to be that couple?” After a moment of silence you nodded to yourself. “Of course we do. We’ll annoy the shit out of people.”

“Exactly!”

“So what were you thinking?” You asked again when you reached his room; a room you stayed in plenty of time. You were the one who hogged his bed and constantly fought over room while, Yoongi, poor Yoongi, had to watch from the other side. Unlike you, Jungkook had a roommate. 

Opening the door, you both walked in. At the sound, Yoongi’s head popped up from his laying down position on the bed. “Y/N! I never thought I’d say this, but I missed you here!” Yoongi shouted, grinning ear to ear. You’ve never seen him like this.

“Hyung,” Jungkook sighed. 

“Nope, I missed Y/N. How many times have I told you to apologize to her for ignoring her for so long?” Yoongi stood up and walked over to the both of you. 

“Many,” Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck, awkwardly, casting his eyes downward.

“Oh really? Well, hate to break it to you but it required a Vmin intervention to get him to apologize,” You playfully scowled in Jungkook’s direction. 

“Why, what happened?”

“Remember Y/F/N?”

“That girl I met once when she came over and after she left, I banned her from coming back because she was too damn annoying? Yeah, I remember her,” Yoongi rolled his eyes as if recalling a day he’d much rather forget. 

“She wasn’t my pen pal…Y/N was,” Jungkook still obviously felt guilty for picking a stranger over you.

“Oh? That makes a lot of sense. I liked your pen pal’s sense of humor and I liked Y/N,” Snapping his fingers he shook his head, “Should connected them sooner.”

“Well, now she’s exposed and Kook and I want to get revenge,” You clapped your hands, smiling sweetly.

“And we’re dating! Y/N, can’t forget about the highlight,” Jungkook grinned.

“I sure hope you are. The way Jungkook used to go on and on about you, you already knew he was in love with you.” 

“Oh really?”

“Hyung! Not important right now! Revenge plan, remember?” Jungkook waved his hands around.

“I love a good revenge plan. What were you thinking?”

“Remember the paint war we were supposed to have?”

“The one with the balloons?”

Nodding his head, Jungkook grinned. “That’s a great idea!”

Looking between the two boys who’d be thought being twelve years old with a conversation like this, you were confused. Paint war? Balloons? 

“You think? It isn’t too mean?”

“You’re asking the wrong person…I’d write roast the shit out of them with a diss track. How can I help?”


“Great. More of Jungkook’s friends. Wanna yell at me, too?” You overheard Y/F/N groan when she spotted Yoongi, Namjoon and Jin approaching her. 

Both you and Jungkook were hiding on top of a probably restricted construction structure. It was in front of one of the buildings being repaired from storm damage. Under the structure, was Y/F/N where you had planned her to be. 

“We were just wondering why you lied to Jungkook,” Jin said, innocently, walking closer, but not close enough to be ‘revenge-ed.’

“I have to explain it to you, too? Ugh, honestly if I had known this would be the consequences of being his friend in the first place then I’d–” You nudged Jungkook to hurry up and start. Jungkook sent you a smirk before dropping the blue water balloon so it landed on her head. 

She let out a shriek as you stifled a laugh. The boys in front of her laughed their asses off, and you quickly grabbed the special present Taehyung gave you. Throwing it on the ground next to her, an eruption of purple smoke was released. 

“Smoke bomb. Smart,” Jungkook nodded, handing you a balloon. You both threw the remaining balloons before the smoke dissipated and scurried off the structure. You pretended to be just walking in on the scene, noticing the boys motioning you over. 

“You did this!” Y/F/N pointed an accusing finger at the two of you. Putting both your hands up in surrender you denied, “We just got here, how would we?” You couldn’t contain your laugh as you observed her. She was a rainbow. Her arms were green and orange, while her head and torso was a mixture between blues and pinks. 

“Then maybe it was the other two,” She was fuming. 

“Us?” Taehyung and Jimin genuinely just entered the scene. All the while, other students walked by with snickers and smirks on their faces.

“Wondered why she got that.”

“I don’t care. She deserved it. You know she stole my boyfriend in freshman year?”

“She looks better like that.”

“I’d give a high five to the person who did that.”

Smirking to yourselves, both you and Jungkook returned to your dorm room. “Now, that, was fun,” You yelled, a large grin on your face. Tackling Jungkook in an embrace, you sighed in content. 

“Princess, as long as you’re dating me, it’ll always be fun,” He wiggled his eyebrows, suggestively.

“Says the virgin,” You smirked causing him to gasp. 

“Hey! You’re making fun!”

“No, no, just a small tease,” You leaned up and pecked his lips. Humming in response, Jungkook pulled you onto your bed. Hovering over you and wrapping his arms around you, he gave a cute smile.

“Just letting you know, I’m not letting go. Ever,” He buried his head in the crook of your neck as you laid underneath him.

“Good. Because I don’t want you to.”

The both of you soon fell asleep, your hand playing with his hair, a new thing you did that Jungkook loved. However, like the last time, you managed to move around so you were against his chest and legs tangled together. 

This time, when you woke up, there was no awkwardness. Soft smiles and sweet words were exchanged between you two and man, you wondered what the hell you did to deserve it. 


That day, you were both sent to you Dean’s office where Y/F/N, still some part of her body covered in paint splatters, sat in his chair. You sat in the other two seats next to Y/F/N. 

“I’m sorry Y/F/N, but no one saw it,” your Dean apologized.

“They had a smoke bomb! Believe me they did it!” She pointed another accusing finger at you.

“And why would they do that?” The Dean raised his eyebrow. You and Jungkook exchanged glances. You were both expecting this. If Y/F/N said you waned revenge, she’d have to explain why. And why would be the reason she’d be in trouble. Pretending to be someone else, especially if it was part of an assignment, was a violation and she knew that.

Opening her mouth a few times, she looked down and grumbled to herself. Looking back up sweetly, she apologized, “You know, it probably wasn’t them. I’m sorry for wasting your time.” Then she marched out the door and closed it behind her. 

“I’m sorry I had to have you here. You see, paint was thrown at Y/F/N and she thought you two were the culprits. Do you know why’d she’d think that?”

The both of you shook your heads in disbelief, widening your eyes. “What?” “No way!”

“I thought so. You can leave now,” the Dean motioned to the door. 

“See? Smoke bombs are smart,” you smirked, out of ear range of the Dean’s office.

Intertwining your hands, Jungkook sighed, “What an adventure; First I talked to my pen pal, then you, then back to my pen pal, then you, and then Y/F/N, and then you who was my pen pal all along? Wow, what a story to tell.”

“Yeah, at least we’re both at fault. We both did stupid things.”

“Because we’re both idiots,” Jungkook finished.

“For each other,” you pinched his cheek lovingly, causing him to groan. 

“You’re lucky I love you.”

“As Sarcastic Princess would say, I love me too,” You smiled when he chuckled. “Oh, and I love you, too.”


ITS OVER *wipes tear* I hope this was an okay ending that satisfied you all! Thank you all so much for reading this and leaving such sweet messages and asks. I couldn’t ask for a better bunch of readers.

As for the next pen pal, it’s going to be….*drum rolls* Yoongi’s!!! So all you Yoongi biased (heh me too) be sure to stick around!! Pls, I love making friends.

How did you like it? Any particular parts you loved? Let me know!

I love y’all~

100 ways to say ‘I love you’, Skins edition
  1. ‘Wake up (name), you twat.’
  2. ‘Do you want a coke or something?’
  3. ‘Can I carry your books?’
  4. ‘Yeah, wow, lovely… No. But I like that you’re funny Iooking.’
  5. ‘Oh thank you, you’re so nice.’
  6. ‘You fancy me?’
  7. ‘I think that could have gone a lot worse, don’t you?’
  8. ‘We’ll miss you, won’t we?’
  9. [ text ] : EAT
  10. ‘Have you always had that mole?’
  11. ‘I’m respecting. Believe me, I’m respecting.’
  12. ‘You alright? Do you want to dance?’
  13. ‘Do you want me to walk you home?’
  14. ‘We’ll make ourselves comfy, yeah?’
  15. ‘Shall I give you head?’
  16. ‘I’m gonna get an early night. Coming to bed?’
  17. ‘I’ll give you head - that’s friendship.’
  18. ‘But what about you? You’ve got bigger problems than me.’
  19. ‘I like your hair.’
  20. ‘And I’m really, really sorry for being a slut, okay?’
  21. ‘I realised something. I’ve been an idiot.’
  22. ‘And I was hoping maybe you’d give me another chance?’
  23. ‘You’re clever, funny, and… very, very pretty.’
  24. ‘So I’ll see you around.’
  25. ‘(name), you came! I mean, cool, I mean… I wasn’t sure you would.’
  26. ‘Do you think they’ll give us a joint cell?’
  27. ‘I don’t want this to be difficult.’
  28. ‘Did you get beaten up?’
  29. ‘I want to speak to you, and I think you want to speak to me.’
  30. ‘Kiss me again.’
  31. ‘Come on, I’m taking you for breakfast.’
  32. ‘Happy birthday, mate.’
  33. ‘There’s something I have to get off my chest and if I don’t, I’m afraid everything might just totally go to shit.’
  34. ‘Come to bed with me. Please.’
  35. ‘You’re my best friend, but I really don’t know what the fuck you’re on about most of the time.’
  36. ‘See? I remembered your favourite.’
  37. ‘Look, sorry, (name). But your mum says we gotta take you home.’
  38. ‘Come out. I’ll get you dancing.’
  39. ‘Do I have to gay you now?’
  40. ‘Right, I know it might seem a bit fast, but, well, I think we’re ready, so, er, (name) … I want you to move in with me.’
  41. ‘Let’s talk. Fill me in with everything. Every little detail.’
  42. ‘We can carry on pretending, if it makes you feel any better.’
  43. ‘And I fucking love you.’
  44. ‘Wow! You’ve got a wacker lot of doughnuts.’
  45. ‘Cheeky.’
  46. ‘Thanks for keeping schtum.’
  47. ‘Hi, I made tea.’
  48. ‘I’ve never been to a pyjama party before, so I brought Vodka. Was that right?’
  49. ‘I’ll show you how to do a blowjob.’
  50. ‘I missed you… I missed you too much.’
  51. ‘I think you can do anything.’
  52. ‘It’s also nice just being with you, when you’re not being a prick, that is.’
  53. ‘You alright?’
  54. ‘I know you, (name). I know you’re lonely. I think you need someone to want you. Well, I do want you. So be brave. And want me back!’
  55. ‘Fuck you.’
  56. ‘Can’t we just sit like this … for a bit?’
  57. ‘This is a once-only charity event, you understand?’
  58. ‘I bought a fucking gateaux.’
  59. ‘Please. Can we start again?’
  60. ‘Facebook really needs to hear about this.’
  61. ‘You’re very stalkable.’
  62. ‘I was scared!’
  63. ‘I am so proud of you.’
  64. ‘Don’t you think you’ve had enough?’
  65. ‘She’s lovely, isn’t she?’
  66. ‘You look nice in that dress.’
  67. ‘You are doing so well, sweetheart.’
  68. ‘So you’re mental, and I’m useless.’
  69. ‘So, what are we doing next, mystery girl?’
  70. ‘I’ll never forget you.’
  71. ‘Hi. I got eggs. We can have eggs, yeah? And Red Bulls and pain au chocolat.’
  72. ‘I’d die for you. I love you. I love you so much and it’s killing me.’
  73. ‘Don’t take any crap this time.’
  74. ‘Badass.’
  75. ‘You’ve totally got, like, “fuck me” eyes, girl. Totally “fuck me sideways” eyes.’
  76. ‘Maybe we can go together.’
  77. ‘Don’t be an ass hat and people will like you more.’
  78. ‘I’m trying to understand your way, but you won’t let me.’
  79. ‘You’ve got quite a rep, but you’re actually pretty sound.’
  80. ‘You’ve got to stick it to the man, bruv.’
  81. ‘You need to sort yourself out.’
  82. ‘Remember when we were kids and we used to talk about just… just fucking it, running away and becoming roadies?’
  83. ‘Everything is going to be fine, I promise you.’
  84. ‘Hi, you look nice.’
  85. ‘You may live your life as you want.’
  86. ‘We’ll do a girls’ night in.’
  87. ‘You’re a shape-shifter of happiness.’
  88. ‘It’s not like we’re getting married! It was one dinner!’
  89. ‘Thank you, my henna-handed honcho.’
  90. ‘I’m sorry. I was just looking for somewhere a bit quiet.’
  91. ‘It’s heavenly.’
  92. ‘Why aren’t you here?’
  93. ‘I tried to ring you.’
  94. ‘Everything’s better. Here you are again.’
  95. ‘I’ll dance with you.’
  96. ‘What’s happened to you, (name)?’
  97. ‘I didn’t wanna tell you this when you were all smitten and shit but you can do better.’
  98. ‘Oh, my God! Oh, my God! I’m so glad you came!’
  99. ‘I promise. Everything’s going to be alright.’
  100. ‘ I love you.’

AU PROMPTS (based on my first semester of university)

I’m helping you move in and it looks like you brought way more things then you need. “I just wanted to be prepared!” AU


You’re my room mate and it turns out my birthday is the day after yours. “I’m older. I get dibs on which bunk I get!” AU


“Hello, do ya wanna join-” “Fuck off.” AU


“Free food! Free food!” “Don’t lie! The crowd will get mad!” “So what?” “I don’t wanna die before the semester even begins!” AU


We’re supposed to be room mates of three but the third never showed. “What are we gonna do about the other bed?” AU


I lost my school card and you’re the person who finds it AU


The dining center doesn’t have gluten-free food and I know you’re allergic to it so I offer you some of my gluten-free care package a friend sent me AU


I showed up 30 minutes late to this lecture but luckily you’re kind enough to let me see the notes I missed AU


“Can you please stop taking pics of me failing at making a cup of noodles?” AU


You’re my room mate’s friend which makes you my friend by default AU


I noticed that the dorm next door has something from fandom drawn/written on the window AU


I didn’t buy the textbook. “Would you mind if we shared or at least studied together?” AU


I need help with some mundane college thing 24/7. “Can you tell I’m a first-year?”