what am i translating

AGUST D

there are so many important messages that suga is trying to convey to his listeners through his mixtape and im sure that if you’ve read the lyric translations, you definitely know what i mean. i am seriously blown away that we’ve been fans of bts for what, 3 years now? for 3 years, ARMYs have easily labelled yoongi as ‘lazy’, given him that ‘idagf’ image, and yet, we were oblivious to so many of his hardships. we’ve always known that he’s hardworking, more quiet than the other members, and more reflective, but this mixtape honestly blew me away because yoongi’s gone through so much in his idol career and we had no idea. 

first off, he touches on a sensitive topic that idols don’t speak openly about: mental health. he raps about seeing a psychiatrist, battling with depression, self-hate, experiencing social phobia since age 18, putting on a front, and loneliness. His entire song “The Last” really touches on this:

a word said like habit, oh, I don’t give a shit, I don’t give a fuck
those words are all words I use to hide my weak self
that time I want to erase, that’s right, the memories I want to erase of that day I had that concert
I was afraid of people, so I hid in the bathroom and stared at myself

and in “So Far Away”:

I’m in so much pain and lonliness but people around me keeping telling me to regain my consciousness
I try to vent my anger but I only got myself so what’s the point of venting my anger
I’m scared to open my eyes everyday and start breathing

these lyrics from ‘At Dawn’ also illustrate this:

I pretend I’m not lonely, I pretend I’m not suffering
I pretend I’m okay for no reason, meaninglessly I pretend to be strong
don’t come over the wall I’ve put up in front of myself
don’t throw me off this island in this wide sea 

he also talks about his struggles during his trainee days and i dont think he’s ever talked in depth about this period of his life. this mixtape gives us some insight about him moving to seoul, getting a part time job to afford the cost of living in the city, going to school dead tired after work, and still training with big hit to live out his dreams

was I needy for success? No just needy for money
it’d been a long time since I forgot the words ‘in style’
I practiced at night and went to my part time job at dawn
then even if I dragged that tired body to school I just slept
I became 20 that way, the sight of the graduation room was suspicious

and the fact that he admits he puts up a front:

I hide the self that’s behind my defensive posture
I hide myself completely like I’ve become a criminal, always
I can’t even take one step outside the dorm that’s like a prison 

all of these are reasons im so moved. because it really highlights how idols only show one side of themselves to the camera, and fans can never really know them fully. we only know the version of bts’ min yoongi that he wants to show us through shows and broadcasts. 

behind every idol rapper who succeeds
there’s a weak self standing, it’s a little dangerous
I fall sometimes again into depression and compulsion
hell no, anyway I don’t even know if that’s the real me

but through his music? through his mixtape, he’s trying to show us another side of him, and i’m so thankful that he’s opened up to his worldwide audience. this takes courage. talking openly about your hardships and your weaknesses to people who look up to you, that takes some damn courage. so thank you, yoongi, for opening up to your fans. 

8

If the Assassin’s Creed characters had tumblr. [ pic/gif credits (x)(x)(x) ]

Dragon Age Version
Mass Effect Version

7

Another wild ride with Drunk Google. 

EDIT: BL-kun has arrived so I’m adding them to this.

(Jin High)

a queer & trans Jewish perspective on names (notes for a zine)

hello friends! i’m starting to put together sources & thoughts for an upcoming comic zine i’m doing called “True Names” that brings together my perspectives on (self-)naming as a queer, trans, witchy Jew - i just finished the excellent Magic of the Ordinary by Gershon Winkler & thought i’d share some relevant quotes & thoughts with you all:

“…no name can hold within it that which is infinite. God, Judaism teaches, is un-name-able, un-peg-able, un-define-able, because not only is God infinite but also dynamic, eluding all attempts to attain a snapshot of a moment or essence of what is God. Therefore, when Moses asked the Creator to divulge the God Name, the Creator’s response was אֶהְיֶה אֲשֶׁר אֶהְיֶה (ehyeh asher ehyeh), which translates simultaneously: ‘I was what I was, I am what I am, and I will be what I will be’:

You wish to know my name? According to my actions I am called. At times I am called el shadai, or tz'vaot, or elo-heem. When I judge the creations, I am called elo-heem; when I battle wrongness, I am called tz'vaot; when I suspend the sins of humanity, I am called el shadai; and when I exercise compassion upon my worlds, I am called yhvh. In other words, I was what I was, I am what I am, and I will be what I will be—according to the nature of my actions I am called. (p.35)

this strikes some major chords with me re: labeling and queerness - existing in flux or outside of conventional definitions/structures, struggling to find words for that or to make existing words fit - and also the idea of a name as describing an action really resonates with me. Winkler expands on that idea when paraphrasing Rabbi Chayyim of Volozhin:

…that which is comprehended somewhat by us, and we decorate this grasping with various God-Names and Divine Attributes and the like—as we find in our Scriptures and in the various forms of our prayers—reflect only God’s relationship with the universes…even [in invoking] the essential, singular Name itself we are not connecting with the Selfhood-Essence of God but with that aspect of the Blessing Source that is in relationship with the universes… (p. 36)

in this view, a name describes not who you are essentially (what could possibly describe that?) but rather who you are to the world, especially who you are to the world in this moment:

This explains the baffling response which the Hebrew ancestor Ya’akov receives from the spirit being with whom he wrestles, after asking it to divulge its name to him: “Why do you ask me for my name?”about which the second-century Rabbi Abba Arecha comments in the name of Rabbi Yosei bar Dowstai: “The angels have many names, according to their calling [in the moment]…[Said the angel to Ya’akov] ‘I am puzzled [that you ask me my name] for I do not know what my name is changing into in this very moment!” (p. 36, emphasis mine)

i imagine you can see where i’m going with this in relationship to changing names as a trans person - if a name is connected to an action or calling, choosing a new name for yourself is the process of describing what (& how) you do in the world right now, which may be different from what you did in the past or what others expected you to do. there are of course trans folks who don’t change their names (for many reasons), but for those of us who do, we’re responding to the sense that our birth names don’t (or never did) describe us accurately. the concept of a “deadname” becomes that which is no longer active - a thing we just aren’t doing anymore, and for a lot of people, being addressed by that name sounds like a request to perform that action again when at best we’ve moved on, and at worst, that action hurt us! we’re doing something else now, something more true to our present understanding of ourselves. we’re in a new relationship with the world and our birth names are an old relationship that has ended.

the essential me, including my gender, can’t be contained in any of my names, and none of those names (in my opinion) are more cosmically real or necessarily permanent than any other - the idea of a magical “true name” is something i want to push back against, and historical Jewish magic backs me up on that with the incantation bowl phrase “and every name [a person] has” 

but my chosen name is powerful because i’m describing me right now, which is really the most important thing since we exist in the present! for me it’s not even a new name - in my case, i’ve been holding onto my chosen name in the back of my mind since i was a child, but have only been able to claim it openly as an adult in the past few years. something about it has clicked with me for that long & it’s a relief to finally be able to use it. other folks are still looking for names that fit, some folks feel good about their birth names! only you get to define the relationship/calling of your name, given or chosen. 

if multiple names/labels and an outright refusal to be defined by others is good enough for the divine, it’s good enough for us - b’tzelem elohim!

9

MOLE’S STORY

I don’t know if I am the only one who was made curious by this scene but I definitely had to figure out his story! And, well, I remembered the little papers with their histories and look who just happened to be on top! Hope you enjoy his not-so-threatening history XD  Sorry if I didn’t make it all pretty/couldn’t get those last few words! Really I was just trying to get his paper ready <3

                                      GAETAN MOLIERE

Mineralogist and Excavation Expert

Age: 39

Birthplace: Paris, France

Parents: Christof and Gabrielle Moliere

Expertise:

Extensive knowledge of (hidden words and letters) in the new science of tectonics. Advis- (hidden words and letters) National du France, Ottoman Mining, Aust- (hidden words and letters) American Coal and Lumber. Has developed (hidden words and letters) independent mining and excavation (hidden words and letters) related equipment. Holds patents on 59. Acute senses, particularly taste and smell, enable Moliere to correctly identify any type of mineral or soil without benefit or aid of any scientific apparatus 98.75% of the time.


Background:

Gaetan Moliere was born to a middle class working family, the youngest of 4 brothers. Both his parents were teachers; Christof Moliere teaches University courses at the Serbanne, and Gabrielle Moliere is a retired music teacher. Gaetan displayed an early interest in subterranean pursuits at the early age of 7 when he began exploring the vast sewer networks that lie underneath old Paris. By the age of 13, Moliere had developed a specialized type of goggles and headgear to wear while exploring caves in surrounding countryside, as the sewers and catacombs held no further challenge or mysteries for him. He entered Serbanne at age 17, but left soon after when given the opportunity to act as a special technical adviser to a local mining company. Soon thereafter, Moliere developed what could be termed his “specialty” of the ability to “taste” and identify various soils (hidden words and letters and that’s it). 

HOPE THIS SATISFIED SOME OF YOUR BURNING CURIOSITY!!! I know it did for me ^^

Next, with the too-much-time on my hands, I shall translate the Shepherd’s book into English! Maybe the writers put something interesting in there for us :)

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THE BEST PLAYER IN THE HISTORY OF CHILE… Iván Zamorano, not you Vidal, who even are you, you have only one copa américa, idiot.

[ENG] Haikyuu LN Vol 6 - The ‘Cats’ Of The Future

(Because the precious first year kittens are precious and everything about Nekoma is gold. It’s quite short but I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Not beta’d. The content is under the cut~)

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4

“all i’m getting from you is…colors.”

or the one in which cas is basically a walking and talking color wheel

2
あなたが美しく見える
Rin & Sousuke Save Makoto from Iwatobi Villains
Free! Eternal Summer Vol. 3 DVD Drama CD
Rin & Sousuke Save Makoto from Iwatobi Villains

Hilarious excerpt from the “Long Throw Distance of that Summer” Drama CD from the Free! Volume 3 DVD. Enjoy x~

~~~

Makoto: Damn it! Let me out of here! Just what exactly do you plan to do with me by locking me up like this?

Haru: Tachibana Makoto. Be quiet. If you synthesise yourself with an animal and become an altered human being, your daily life in this world will never be filled with worry or pain.

Rei: Muahahaha, what should we change you into? Maybe a killer whale? Or perhaps a dolphin? Whatever you become, you’ll certainly be beautiful! AHHHHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!!!!

Nagisa: It won’t do to make you just a normal animal! We should give you a huge mouth and sharp thin teeth!*

Makoto: Stooopppppp!!!

Rin: You’ve gone far enough!

Haruka: Rin!

Rin: Free Makoto now!

Haru: I can’t do that!

Rin: Haru, have you forgotten what happened in the past since you have become an Iwamoge monster?

Haru: Shut up!

Rin: Just remember, Haru! Even though I too was physically altered, heart to heart, I still wouldn’t forget the limits of my own power!

Sousuke: That’s right. Nor would you forget a very hot friendship.

Rin: Sousuke! You finally came! Let’s combine our powers!

Sousuke: Yeah! Our Friendship Butterfly Cross!

Rin & Sousuke: DOUBLE CHANGE! BUTTERFLY CROSS! DARK HERO! 

*makes dorky and lame laser noises* TARGET IWATOBI.

Rei: They teamed up by combining themselves and got a power up!

Nagisa: What are you doing? GET THEM!!!

Haru: We must not let them have Tachibana Makoto!

Rin & Sousuke: ALL RIGHT LET’S DO IT.

Haru: Moge~~**

~~

Makoto: Haru? Hey Haru!

Haru: Nn…

Makoto: Are you awake, Haru?!

Haru: It was…a dream?

~~

Translator’s Notes: *Anon notified me that this refers to the lockjaw fish thing that Haru likes from the Haru/Rin drama CD

**I’m not sure why Haru keeps on saying “moge” at the end of his sentences. EDIT: I think it’s a character from Godzilla???

In other news, I LIVE FOR SOUSUKE AND RIN’S SUPER STUPID LASER SHOOTING NOISES LOLOL

this is chanyeol giving an “X” sign to their managers after they told them to end the concert after 3 songs.

The sponsors of K-Friends Concert took all of exo-l’s money and never paid EXO for their performance. EXO had to change at their hotel and perform bare faced. They performed for FREE against SM’s wishes. Now if this isn’t a show of love towards exo-ls, then I don’t know what is.

(Translation) Kare Pillow vol. 8

大好きな彼とHして腕まくらでピロートークされちゃう vol. 8 (R18! Proceed only if you’re above 18!)

CV. Hanae Natsuki


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Summary: You’re in a dance club and your kouhai fell in love with you, thus you guys started dating. One day you go on an amusement park date with him, which leads to spending the night and some pillow talk. ifyouknowwhatimean


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