Note: From now on I’m going to use the phrase “honey relationships” to differentiate spoiled girlfriend relationships from SB/SD relationships - just for the sake of clarity. I’ll also be using the phrase “honey boyfriend” to differentiate spoiling boyfriends from sugar daddies.
One of the biggest differences between a sugar relationship and a honey relationship is the time that you are “behind the scenes.” What I mean by that is the real time and effort that we expend looking fabulous, maintaining our appearance and health, and doing the personal things we need to do to keep our minds and emotions right.
As a sugar baby, the time you spend with an SD tends to be limited. Sure, you may have a night out - but how much time do you spend getting ready for it? A few hours doing your hair and makeup, all of the exercise and careful eating you do beforehand to maintain your physique, the careful shopping to find the perfect outfits, shoes, lingerie. It’s a lot!
What an SD sees is your final product: opening night. He doesn’t see what’s behind the curtain.
A honey boyfriend has more access to you, and therefore he’s going to see a lot more of those behind the scenes moments. This can cause problems! It can ruin the mystique and excitement. It can take away your magic as the prize that he’s worked so hard to attain.
So what’s a girl to do when you live with your honey boyfriend or you spend so much time together that him seeing you behind the scenes is inevitable?
How to Make Behind the Scenes an Intimate Experience
1. Channel your inner glamorous goddess. Find yourself some beautiful dressing gowns/robes (on his dime of course)! I personally love kimono style robes because I think they’re flattering on everyone and since they’re floor length, you can literally be completely naked underneath and if you need to run out and grab the newspaper or change the laundry, at least you will look damn good doing it.
2. Lounge in style. Girls, I do not know of nor have I ever seen a single woman who did not look bomb in yoga pants and a slouchy, off the shoulder top. Get rid of your ratty around-the-house clothes and get some flattering, sensual lounge clothing. My go-to is The Limited - I really like their Lounge collection. Some athletic wear that’s more designed for yoga and pilates is also great for just hanging around the house, but the booty is poppin’ and your shape is lookin’ lit.
3. Create a beautiful space where the magic happens. I have a vanity with my perfume, makeup, hair products, and a few pretty little tchotchkes to add decor (an expensive masquerade mask from a fetish event we attended, a small ring and bracelet holder, etc.) Play some sensual music while you get ready - jazz, classical piano, R&B, whatever your jams are. When you sit down to do your makeup and hair, your honey now sees you as not only a beautiful woman, but someone who has let him into your most intimate moments.
4. Cut the ditz crap when you’re choosing an outfit. Every man I have ever dated has communicated to me the annoyance and frustration of dealing with my indecision in choosing outfits. It’s the equivalent of being in midtown traffic - start, stop, start, stop. Once you choose an outfit, stick to it!
5. Make your health regimen Insta-worthy. This one requires some commitment, but try not to look crazy when you go to the gym if you know your honey is going to see you before, during or after. Yes, we know you’re there to sweat. But throwing on a pair of diamond studs and just making sure your hair is slicked back so you don’t have those random alfalfa frizzies doesn’t take much time. Having cute activewear is easier than ever because so many companies are entering the market. Some of my favorite coordinated activewear sets are from Old Navy! Just like you’d coordinate your bag and shoes to go to dinner, it doesn’t take much to just make sure your sneakers and headband are the same color - and it makes a huge difference. You go from “average attractive girl at gym” to “sugar baby at gym still looking fly as fuck.”
5. Some things should still remain behind-the-behind-the-scenes. Your bowel movements, hair removal methods, menstrual activities, pimple popping (don’t do it but if you do), face masks, foul smelling hair treatments all need to happen when he’s not around or behind closed doors. Nothing kills the fantasy of a dazzling sugar baby like the stench of a recently blown up bathroom - put that Febreze or Lysol spray within reach at all times.
You may need to get creative with when these things happen, but trust me - it’s worth it. As for menstrual activities - I have been using Thinx for several months now and my life has changed infinitely for the better. If you have a light to medium menstrual flow like me, you probably won’t even need to buy tampons or pads anymore! I haven’t for at least six months.
6. Limit the negative self-talk. You wouldn’t air your insecurities to your sugar daddy. Why? Because you are marketing yourself as someone valuable and worthy of investment. You don’t draw attention to flaws. The tendency and the habit is to share those feelings with your honey, but try to nip that as much as possible. When you harp on that little bit of tummy fat, those stretch marks, and other “flaws” of your physicality, you draw his attention to them. He may not even have noticed them until you pointed them out! Case in point: I am very insecure about my teeth. I have a crooked smile and I always have. I said this in passing once to an ex-boyfriend who was shocked “I never really noticed, I guess I just like that your smile is different.” Mind you, after I brought it up, several times he asked me if I would consider getting braces. He got the boot for other reasons, but you see what I’m saying.
7. Give yourself ample time to get ready and avoid the manic panic. We all know stress is contagious. If you know it takes you two hours to get ready, give yourself two and a half if you can! That way you are relaxing, your man is watching this beautiful transformation, and you’re not running through your house like a bat out of hell trying to get your life together.
Oh god, why did she agree to this? ‘Dress to impress’, that was what Rose said, helping her to find a perfect outfit for the night. But this thing she was wearing, this wasn’t an outfit at all, this was a nighty, maybe even a half of a nighty, maybe even a quarter. She felt naked, vulnerable, cold. Music was pumping, Rose and Tay were nowhere to be seen, she was surrounded by flashes of bright light, that nauseated her, and people she didn’t knew, some of them openly ogling her. She tried to calm herself down, tried to manage her breathing, but the efforts only made her hyperventilate more. Her palms got wet, her head got heavy with the slowly approaching darkness, her legs became weaker, weaker… and then… nonexistent…
• the type of best friend • who u kind of want to stab 71% of the time • and johnny insists that’s how u kno it’s real • “it makes the friendship real bc you want to kill me but you won’t because you’d miss me this is tru love y/n” • always trying to pull pranks on you • like the classics puts your hand in warm water when you fall asleep • swapping your shampoo for hair removal cream • you noticed right away • but you were a little too close to maybe going bald • you guys have something of a prank war going on
N: is the perfect type of guy that you’d wanna bring over to meet your parents. He’s not even stressing- he’s got the perfect outfit, knows exactly what to expect from them and what kind of questions they’d throw at him, and he’s bought the perfect gift to have that cherry on top.
Leo: he’s only nervous if he senses that you are, other than that he’d be pretty nonchalant. Ofc he’d make sure to clean up nicely and to not have his hands all over you out of respect for them, and try his best to not stay quiet for the whole night. He’d surprise you by cracking a couple jokes and winning your parents over in no time.
Ken: you’d have to tell him to calm his hyper self down before meeting them. He doesn’t want them to get the wrong impression and think of him as childish, so he’ll remain polite and quiet unless your parents ask him something.
Ravi: he’s hella nervous but he’ll be dead before he admits it. Pretends he’s got everything under control when driving over to their place, but you can tell by the way his hands are shaking and his eyes darting in your direction every so often. His nerves would wash away when your parents welcome him and act friendly, so he’s all smiley and happy the whole night.
Hongbin: is thinking of the most inappropriate things while having dinner, esp if you’re wearing something revealing. Something about the fact that your parents are sitting right there is making him think this way, as if he knows he’s gonna embarrass himself and be a goof. He’d shake it off and remains chatty until it’s time to leave, then he’s thankful that he got it over with.
Hyuk: he’s as devious as ever, and tries to embarrass you even in front of your parents. He’d tell funny stories and get along with them perfectly, but can’t stop teasing you and makes those stories about all the times you’ve done something stupid or funny lmao.
Marbas da hearts_murmur Tramite Flickr: “He wears woe as others wear velvet; sorrow flatters him like the light of candles; tears become him like jewels.”
-Lestat (Tale of the Body Thief)
I always loved this quote about Louis, and it suits Marbas so well, too. Hehe.
I love this doll. Not just because he’s gorgeous, but because it feels like a collaboration between me and some of my favorite doll artisans and friends! When I asked Ayu&Ana to make this outfit, they were so excited about it because Marbas really inspired them, and I think it really comes across in what they made. This outfit is more perfect than anything I could have designed myself! And when I asked Amet to make him some headgear, she meticulously crafted this little crown with golden spikes for me. Look how perfect it is!
Marbas is a Glorydoll Louis.
#shit shit shit shit shit fUCK ok #do you think she noticed #ok wang so there’s still time to recover you got this #come on tHINK you’re the woLF DOG #omg what if i just pretend like im brushing dirt off my outfit?? perfect #that’s a totally reasonable reason to be next to her face right #nice #oooOOO ill just lean back and look to the side #bitches love it when you look to the side #yES oh my god brilliant #she’ll never suspect a thing #wang so more like wang sMOOTH amirite #4th prince of goryeo 1st prince of motherfucking stealth #and they say wook is the smart one get on my fucking LEVEL #ok can i look back at hae soo now #hae soo is so pretty #i love her so much
“What are you doing?” Klaus asked as he watched you placing your hands over an old book.
“With the book or the floating?” You asked opening your eyes and looking down on him.
“Well it’s perfectly ordinary for someone to have a book, so, yes I’m questioning the floating witch in my living room.” Your giggle made him raise an eyebrow and a look of irritation flickered across his face.
“Technically your all dead and as Elijah’s my legal guardian I inherited everything you own when I turned eighteen.” It was his turn to chuckle as he reached up and gripped your ankles, yanking you to his eyes level.
“Human technicalities do not count when we are discussing levitation in the vampire’s living room.” He let you go a little to suddenly and you shot upwards before dropping down an alarming speed, luckily he caught you before you crashed to the floor.
You jumped out of his arms and huffed before you swept out of the room. Returning momentarily to retrieve your book from his outstretched hand and thundered up the stairs to your room.
“You two are just awful, if I’d have known how sickening it would be to watch you fall in love I’d have sent her home.” Rebekah said as she strolled through the living room and jogging up the stairs.
After a few minutes you followed Becca out towards the car only to have Klaus stop you both and look at you questioningly.
“We’re going clothes shopping.” She stated quickly and pushed you towards the door.
“Why?” He looked at you and smiled dangerously as if he knew you’d cave.
“We’re going to a party.” You tried to make it past him but found yourself wrapped in his arms with your chin on his shoulder.
She spends most of her money on clothes, and the worst thing is: she doesn’t even wear half of them.
Literally, her wardrobe is a MESS. Most of her clothes aren’t even hung up, they’re just strewn around.
She loves going to town and shopping, especially when she’s with friends!
Trying on Riko’s and You’s clothes has always been pretty fun for her as well.
But god, someone put a handle on this girl.
She has NEVER seen the sales sections of shops, no matter how hard You tries to drag her there.
Her mum hates her and her wardrobe.
Her sister just laughs at her though.
Honestly, all of this just fuels her addiction.
You also really likes shopping!
But she prefers making her own clothes out of plain outfits or cheap fabrics.
Usually, she just window shops to get inspiration.
She’s very, very good at managing her money with shopping. When she does buy clothes, they’re usually on sale.
You is always found ripping through the sales section of the store due to this.
She really enjoys shopping for her friends and dolling them up as well!
She cannot stand Chika’s wardrobe.
There’s so much potential
Why do you have a fedora in five different colours, nobody’s ever seen you wear one
WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE A FEDORA
Riko likes shopping!
She’s fairly particular about clothes though. She loves simple dresses, but refuses to buy one that’s tight in the bust, shows stomach or cleavage, or has a skirt that’s too short.
Unfortunately, dresses like that are pretty hard to find these days…
Riko’s fairly tall, but also very slim, so when she does find a dress, the ones left are usually two sizes too big.
She tends to shop online now, since it’s easy to filter out the stuff she doesn’t want.
Sometimes she goes to second hand shops, since they have cheaper and more simple clothes – which is exactly what she likes!
Whenever she has clothes she doesn’t want, she donates them to charity. One day she’d like to be like You and sew old clothes into better ones.
Overall, Riko’s a fairly normal shopper.
She isn’t very fond of shopping. It stresses her out too easily.
Which is a shame, since she really likes trying on new outfits.
But in stores she gets very overwhelmed with all the people and the huge range of clothes available…
It’s Dia who has always shopped for her. Ruby loves this, because she really admires Dia’s fashion sense!
Dia still shops for her even now, but the other members of Aqours like to send her pictures and outfit links to her that they think she’ll like!
Occasionally, she’ll tag along with Riko to second hand shops. They’re much less busy, so she enjoys going there.
The clothes are really cute too!
This also doubles as a bonding time for the two, as they’ve never had much of an opportunity to interact.
Ruby is incredibly grateful for everyone in Aqours.
Hanamaru doesn’t shop a lot by herself, but when she’s invited out, she’s like an excited puppy.
Everyone thinks it’s adorable.
What’s not so adorable is how much she wants to buy.
Hanamaru, are you sure you want three pairs of ripped jeans???
Yoshiko and Ruby decide to keep tabs on how often she shops and who accompanies her.
They feel guilty, but…it’s for her own good.
One time they found her almost giving 100 dollars to a scammer on the street.
It’s all very pure, but also very dangerous.
Hanamaru’s extremely confused over this, but she agrees not to go on a shopping spree without being accompanied.
Yoshiko does nothing but shop online.
She gets way too embarrassed buying little devil fashion in real life, so the internet quickly becomes her best friend.
She’s surprisingly careful with her money, even keeping a budget that she actually sticks to!
She has a super cute fashion sense too, and finds clothes that suit her perfectly.
Yoshiko isn’t very good at picking clothes for other people though. She can’t wrap her head around other people’s fashion.
On the odd occasion that she does go out, she prefers to shop by herself. She finds herself quickly becoming impatient picking out clothes with others; she personally finds independent shopping much more efficient.
While clumsy, she knows how to operate a sewing machine, so she often attempts to adjust clothes slightly so that they are more to her liking.
When she succeeds, she is really happy.
It’s cute to watch!
Mari also loves shopping!
Due to her money, she is lucky to buy whatever the hell she wants.
Trying on new clothes and styles is incredibly fun for her, so she tends to spend at least an hour in the changing room every time she shops.
It’s not surprising that literally nobody wants to go to clothes stores with her.
Her wardrobe is so stuffed with clothes it may as well be bursting – although, to be fair, she does wear all her numerous outfits (somehow).
She tries to buy expensive clothes for Aqours, which they are both flattered and horrified about.
Mari, NOBODY wants those $600 sparkly gold tube dresses.
Chika and You are jealous of Mari’s money. They could buy so much with it! Mari’s more than willing to buy things for them, but they immediately refuse.
It’s just not the same.
Dia is a very, VERY picky shopper.
She’s an absolute nightmare to shop for, because nobody knows what she’d like.
She cannot buy an outfit unless it is completely perfect in every way possible.
Everyone thinks it’s ridiculous. She’ll ditch an otherwise cute outfit just because the sleeves are an inch too short.
You secretly puts more effort into Dia’s costumes because of this.
She generally prefers to shop online for herself since it’s much less of a bother, and because whenever she goes to town the only outfits she brings back are ones for Ruby.
On that note, she’s great at picking outfits out for others! Dia has a very keen eye for detail and fashion.
She would like to start sewing one day, since that would mean she can adjust clothes to her liking.
She’s planning on asking You when she has more free time.
Kanan doesn’t understand how people can spend so much time wondering what outfits to get.
Like…she just gets the first thing she sees that she likes unless it’s too expensive.
Dia especially confuses her.
There’s so many nice clothes! How can you NOT find something you like?
She has a surprisingly large amount of clothes, and like You, Kanan never throws away old ones.
She tends to give them away to charity, and occasionally You or Chika.
Although she’s stopped giving them away to Chika now that she’s taken a good look at her wardrobe.
Kanan also has an amazing range of swimsuits, which everyone is astounded by.
They didn’t even know it was possible for someone to own so many wetsuits.
Have rainbow printed wetsuits always existed?
Dia and Mari swear they’ve only seen her wear the same one bikini, which Kanan denies vehemently.