wfe*

anonymous asked:

Can you do a TFLN where Harry and his wfe are out at dinner with family and sitting across from each other, and he's sending her dirty messages?

I honestly think this is soo funny and cheeky. I can just imagine him looking up at her with a shit eating grin, then holding conversation with his mom as if nothing happened.

Harry       Y/N


You look so sexy and sophisticated 

Talking to my mum about business, with your tits popping out ;)

Babe?

Harry, cut it out

What? I just think you look good tonight

If I were sitting next to you right now…

I’d know just how wet you are

Have my fingers deep inside you while you pretend like nothing is happening

Like when we went out to dinner with Liam and Sophia that one time

Harry, I am sitting next to your mother and older sister

Stop it already

But I want you

I didn’t even want to come here

I wanted to stay in bed with you

Naked


Why’d you kick me?

Because you’re being a pervert at a nice family dinner

Come on, let’s go for a quickie in the bathroom

If you don’t stop, we’re not having sex at all tonight

Okay

I’ll stop

Wouldn’t want you to spank me ;)

Creepypasta #850: Plucked Out Of Time

Length: Long

It’s been four hours at least, the time you’ve spent on this bloody road. The cacti never seems to change; the same three pronged cactus at the left side of the road - it’s always the left side - sticking up from the dirt like the Devil’s pitchfork.

You decide to pull over at the next pitstop, a small bar tucked away in the middle of nowhere. A dim light flickers at the porch, illuminating an unread newspaper at the glass door. You park beside the water pump, and make your way inside.

Oh, hey there, chum! The bartender, a boisterous, chubby man, looks overjoyed to see you. Yer the first customer since, like, forever, man! What’s yer name, and what can I get ya?

You introduce yourself politely and decline his proposal of a drink, asking instead if it was possible to spend the night out at his bar.

No problem, he says. Tell ya what, yer first drink’s on me, being the first customer and all. I’ll share one with ya.

You accept his freebie awkwardly, and inquire about how he manages to keep his business afloat if there were no customers.

Well… ya see, I built this place meself. Always wanted to run a bar, me and me wife. No rent out here, and nobody bothers sending anyone over to catch lil me. I’ve lived here alone for the longest time.

You gently ask about his wfe. The bartender grunts. She left this cursed place, early on. Nobody ever comes in, and when things get too bad, people leave. But somebody’s got to keep the business running, see.

The two of you sip your whiskey quietly, and you apologize for his wife.

Oh, don’t be sorry, lad. It’s for the better. I forced her to leave, and to make sure to be happy always.

A wide grin split his face, startling you.

Bed’s upstairs. There’s food in the pantry; help yourself. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be making a move, he says, grabbing a hat and coat from a bunch of hooks, shutting the glass door behind him.

You get up of your chair. Something’s not right. You grab at the door, but it’s locked tight somehow. The barkeeper ignores your frantic pounding as he reads the newspaper. You can barely make out his mumbling.

28 November… 2015? It’s already been fifty years?

You scream at him to open the door, but he merely surveys you, immense sadness in his melachonic eyes.

Remember what I said about the place being cursed? Well… somebody has to stay back to run the business.

His shoulders stooped as though from a guilty load, the barkeeper turns and faces the dark night.

Now, if there’s nothing else, I really must get going.

Credits to: nichonova