It’s looking increasingly likely that after three years I am finally moving home once again. It’s bittersweet. Part of me feels like I failed once again and got too close to the event horizon of my town’s black hole. That sounds hyperbolic, but there is always a strong gravity around that place both in terms of how it makes me feel and in how I always seem to fall back into it. I feel like all the hard work I’ve done over the last few years has been a total waste of time and that I neglected my own care to help make other people money. C’est la vie, though. That’s the way it goes.
On the other hand, I miss this place. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss the Mississippi river and the weird factory smell that is always strongest first thing in the morning. I never really felt home in the town I’ve been living in. I’ve met some really great people, furthered my career and got much better at my craft, but I always felt a little uncomfortable. It’s weird to be in a town full of west-coast transplants that live off of a trust-find because it’s somehow quirky and weird to live here. On it’s nose, it has always felt pretty insulting to me. And it makes me feel kind of dumb myself because the cost of living here rivals some major Midwestern cities due to those people. It has all the drawbacks of high-cost living and none of the benefits. If you’re hungry beyond ten o’clock and don’t have any food in your house? Tough shit. Lose your job and don’t go to the university? Tough shit.
It’s a weird combination of feelings. I’m angry and upset but excited and relieved at the same time. My hometown is always just a barrier between me and the next part of my life these days anyway. I haven’t lived there longer than nine months at one time in almost a decade. I doubt this time is much different (especially with the crazy projects potentially in the pipeline that I legally cannot speak about yet).
Still, most people in that town do not like me at all and it’s gonna be a mine field like it always is. Whatever. Bring it. I’m ready.
There’s a post going around with a LOT??? of misinformation about the mumps so I just want to say that:
there are actually TWO doses to the mumps vaccination. some people ONLY received one as a child, which leaves them more susceptible to the virus.
even if they have gotten both doses of the vaccination, the vaccination is only about 88% effective. You can STILL get mumps if you’ve been vaccinated. HOWEVER, you’ll probably get a weakened version of the virus.
Mumps is passed around through saliva. So things like sharing water bottles can often cause the fast spread of the virus. Hockey locker rooms = probably a really perfect breeding ground for viruses in general.