Recently, I’ve been getting a lot of asks/comments about Defan, most anons share my views concerning Stefan and Damon’s relationship in that we don’t believe that their “unshakeable bond” their “epic love story” really exists but this seems to be something that people really want to talk about so I’m going to try to articulate my thoughts on the issue.
OK so, I’m rewatching Supernatural so I’m comparing Dean and Sam to Stefan and
Damon and mind you this is seasons 1-5 Dean and Sam because I honestly
couldn’t care less about Supernatural beyond the first five seasons but
part of what makes Dean and Sam work is that they act like brothers,
which is really important:
And we don’t really get that with Defan, we don’t get the annoying quirks, the getting on each other’s nerves, the sayings that only they say to each other, we get it once in 1x09:
But that’s kind of it? And it actually detracts from showing that they’re supposed to have a bond, that they are in fact brothers who know each other despite the fact that they were separated because Dean and Sam were estranged as well but they’re still brothers from the minute they’re introduced:
This isn’t to say that Damon and Stefan don’t have nice moments, they do on a microcosmic level:
Seasons 1 and 2 and parts of season 3 especially show that they have some tenderness beneath the resentment and that when push comes to shove they’ll make sure the other won’t die but Damon literally does too much shit to Stefan for Stefan’s devotion to Damon to make sense.
He killed Lexi on Stefan’s birthday, like can you think about that? Lexi was Stefan’s friend for over a century, she was there for him when no one else was and Damon killed her on Stefan’s birthday. And then there’s the fact that Damon continuously puts love interests above Stefan:
While Stefan continuously puts his brother above love interests:
And we see Stefan repeatedly save and sacrifice for Damon and vouch for Damon and not give up on Damon:
While Stefan is almost like an afterthought to Damon and when he does help him it’s usually like *sigh well he saved me so I have to save him*
But with Sam and Dean, it’s more than familial obligation, when Sam dies, Dean goes to hell for him and it’s not a byproduct of a plan that was supposed to succeed but didn’t like when Damon ends up dying for Stefan, he literally sells his soul for Sam and it eats Sam up, the thought of a world without his brother tortures Sam as much as a world without Sam tortured Dean:
Defan just doesn’t have the overall endearing quality that Supernatural’s brother duo is predicated on for Julie to claim that they’re the true love story of the show, they don’t even feel like brothers tbqh and it’s hard to believe that Stefan means what the writers try to say he means to Damon when Damon can toss Stefan easily to the side in favour of a romantic interest or in favour of his own needs, the show didn’t transition from familial obligation to genuine brotherly bonding and when they do have those “bonding” talks, it’s always about Delena and sometimes Steroline, do they even know each other outside the confines of their respective romantic relationships? It’s a weak ship.
took a deep breath as she looked at Stefan in front of her, classically
handsome in his black tux. It was an overwhelming sensation, to know that he’d
always been hers but to make a ceremony out of that fact. She smiled.
have been five truly thrilling moments in my life as a human and as a vampire.
The first time I mastered a pop-up tuck at cheerleading camp.”
A loud clap sounded from behind Elena and she turned around to see Caroline smiling
brightly at her. “Sorry,” she whispered. “It was just a really great day. We
won regionals that year. Sorry, sorry, I’ll just stop talking now.”
The members in the pew started to
laugh and Elena giggled with them, shaking her head. She turned back to Stefan
who was smiling at her, looking at Caroline with an amused sternness.
off the clock tower my last night as a vampire,” said Elena, continuing her thought.
“Graduating high school with my best friends. Standing on top of a moving
walking down this aisle to you.”
Stefan pressed his lips together and Elena took a deep breath, her eyes shining
as she held his gaze. “Stefan, you thrill me in ways I never thought imaginable
because you do it every day. Every single thing I do excites me because I get
to do them with you, because I get to share my day with you. You make the
simple act of living thrilling. I’m lucky to be surrounded by people who love
me and who I love and being with you, loving you helps me love them even more
because you fill me with so much feeling, more than I can handle. Every time
I’ve been without you life just … doesn’t feel the same, I don’t feel the same,
because I don’t enjoy things the way I do when I’m with you.”
Elena’s words were thick and
blubbery, her face flushed pink with emotion and tears wet her eyelashes. It
was lucky that Bonnie had remembered the water-proof mascara, that Caroline
insisted on nude makeup for the day.
part of this is selfish,” said Elena, trying to catch her breath. “Because I
don’t ever want to lose the way I feel when I’m with you but … the other part
of this, of marrying you, is me wanting to appreciate you and thank you, me
standing in front of everyone I know and vowing that I am and will be devoted
to you. I have always loved you. I’ve never stopped and I know you know I love
you, but I want you to look at this ring —” She turned around and took the
white gold band from Bonnie” “— and see my love for you every day for the
rest of your life.” She slipped it on his finger. “I love you so much.”
Stefan smiled, full-toothed and broad; he sniffed. Elena looked at him,
grinning. “Are you crying?”
“You were always the one who could make cry.”
Elena put her palm on the side of his face and Stefan reached up to put his
hand atop hers. “I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you.”
cleared his throat. “You know, there’s one person I really wish was here
today,” he said. “And that’s my best friend Lexi.”
nodded her head sadly. Behind Stefan, Damon shifted uncomfortably.
first met her, I was lost I was … I was in a really dark place but she
convinced me that it was worth digging myself out of the hole I was in, to let
myself feel, to let myself hurt. She said if I could hurt I could love and the
ability to love deeply was a gift of indescribable joy. I never truly
understood what she meant until I met you.”
out a watery laugh and stroked her thumb across Stefan’s cheek.
you give me something that is essential for my kind, something that doesn’t
turn eternity into a joke or into a hell. Hope. You give me hope and not just
for myself but for … everything. Loving you is how I know that there’s more to
life than pain and sadness and punishment, that there’s good worth living for
because nothing else can explain why I’m so lucky to feel so passionately about
someone as extraordinary as you. You always say that I saved your life but you
were the one who saved mine, you’re what allows me to do more than just
survive, I live every day that I’m
with you, so…I’m sad that Lexi couldn’t be here so I could show her that I
finally get it, what she meant all those years ago but I’m happy that I can
show you and spend every day showing you.” Stefan took Elena’s hand off his
face and held it in his own, squeezing her knuckles with his thumb. Damon gave
him the ring and Stefan peered into Elena’s shining eyes as he slowly put it on
her left index finger.
The Vampire Diaries Episode 8.03 “You Decided That I Was Worth Saving”
BONNIE’S CHOICE — As Enzo (Michael Malarkey) continues to fight the control over him, Bonnie (Kat Graham) finds herself at the center of a deadly game and forced to make a heart wrenching decision involving two of the most important people in her life. At the Armory, Alaric (Matt Davis) researches a mysterious artifact that he hopes will help in their fight to get Damon (Ian Somerhalder) and Enzo back. Finally, Damon’s downward spiral leads him to Tyler Lockwood (guest star Michael Trevino) who attempts to talk some sense into him before it’s too late. Paul Wesley and Candice King also star. Michael Karasick directed the episode written by Chad Fiveash & James Stoteraux (#803). Original airdate 11/4/2016.