well you can if you watch the scene ok

5

Princess Mononoke  (1997) - Hayao Miyazaki

5 bullets on this film:

  • I watched this movie when I was 7 and I cried because it was the most exciting experience of my life. I remember I tried to explain the plot to my mom and she was like ‘what’. Then, 8 years later, I re-watched it and I cried because it was the most exciting experience of my life. Again. 
  • I JUST LOVE HAYAO MIYAZAKI SO MUCH. ALL OF HIS MOVIES ARE SO BEAUTIFUL AND I ALWAYS DIE WHEN I WATCH THEM. I LOVE THE IMAGINARY WORLDS HE CREATES FOR HIS FILMS AND I LOVE EVERYTHING.
  • I really like the presence of strong feminine characters in this film. The scenery is so detailed and beautiful, and the scenes in the forest are amazing. All of the characters are very well developed and they all have an interesting backstory.
  • The story is complex and it can be a little confusing if you don’t know Japanese myths, but the plot is still amazing.
  • Don’t be a little bitch and be like 'oooh,anime is for nerds heueheueh animated movies are for kids and I only watch films in english’. That’s just dumb and you would be an uncultured swine. Every type of movie is good in it’s own way and we can’t judge a film by it’s style. Ok? bye.
4

Himawari: What was the point in the sacrifice thing if he was gonna get his memories back anyway?!

Boruto: It was properly set up with McGucket that the memories can come back! Plus, he saved his family and regained his self worth!

Himawari: But it ruined the weight of the action because now every time I watch this episode I’m gonna know he gets his memory back, and it won’t mean as much! It like when Goku dies! YOU DON’T CARE CUZ YOU KNOW HE’LL BE BACK!

Boruto: …Well, ok, you make a good point. But it means that afterwards we get all those heartwarming emotional scenes with him.

Himawari: …Ok, yeah. I just think it could’ve been done better.

Boruto: It could of, but for what it is, it was still a fantastic finale.

Himawari: Yeah, yeah it was.

i just watched fantastic beasts and where to find them and it was a good time but it was kinda distracting how my brain just kept going, “you see ezra miller’s character? charlie heaton would play it so well”

so it was constantly that plus me @ me going “yeah i know

“do you really tho?? let me remind you again. charlie heaton portrays timid, tortured characters so well!”

“i know i-”

“-remember jonathan byers? i would take a bullet for him. and shut in, while not a very good movie, damn, that scene with the [redacted bc spoilers] and the tears!! god!! he’s so good at playing characters with broken souls. is he even ok??”

please can we just watch this movie”

Originally posted by shitsgold

(day four- (19th) free day
I took the free literally and made it about Lapis’s freedom

@lapidot-week-2016)

Every once in awhile Peridot would find Lapis watching her morp with Percy repeatedly saying “I feel trapped. I feel trapped. I feel trapped.”

Lapis didn’t really like talking about her past and troubles. Whenever Jasper was brought up, she would just leave. Whenever the ship was brought up, she’d change the subject. And she would really make you believe that her morp was just in honour of Camp Pining Hearts.

Peridot was usually ok with this. Trying to not bring up any trigger words, and usually being the one to distract Lapis if anyone else brought them up. But that doesn’t mean she wasn’t curious.

She knew not to pressure Lapis into telling her. She knew that if Lapis wanted to tell her, she would. And she knew if she brought anything up, it might make Lapis pull away from her. They had come so far in their friendship. Peridot didn’t want to scare her away now.

But every time she saw Lapis like this, she really wished she knew what was wrong. Really wish she could help her better than just distracting her. She knew talking about it could help. She just had to have Lapis be the first one to talk.

“Hey Lapis. You doing ok?” Peridot sat next to her and looked up at Percy.

“Yeah. Just watching.”

“You know, we can watch an actual episode.” Peridot tried to tease in a friendly way “We can even watch the episode this scene is in.”

“Nah. I’m fine like this.”

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

“What? Camp Pining Hearts?” Lapis looked over at Peridot, whose eyes shifted down to watch her hands twisting in her lap “oh. No. I’m fine.”

“Lapis…”

“I said I’m fine.”

“Ok. I’m sorry for bringing it up.”

“It’s fine.”

The two gems sat there in silence for what felt like hours. It could possibly had been hours. Just watching Percy, when Lapis piped up.

“Do you feel free?”

“Hm?”

“Do you feel free? On Earth I mean.”

“Well, I suppose so. Not having a ship after centuries of going from planet to planet for missions is a little odd. But I also kinda regret not searching those planets. How different they could be from just my work. I can’t explore the galaxies, but I can explore Earth. Which is so fascinating that it will take forever to get bored of. So yes, I do feel free on Earth.” Peridot paused “What about you?”

“It’s a nice planet.”

Peridot watched her, waiting for more. This was one thing that drove Peridot nuts about Lapis. Peridot would give a long answer for everything, to the point of annoyance. While Lapis’s answers were just a few words. Peridot could write thousand page essays on one little subject while Lapis would struggle to write a paragraph. You’d think someone who’s been through so much would have an infinite amount of words to say, and yet-

“It wasn’t so nice in the mirror. I didn’t see anything besides behind the gem using me. And Pearl really didn’t use me all that much. Until I think Steven was… Created. She kept asking me for battles with Rose. Times with Rose. She used the mirror so much in such a short time that my crack started to grow and I didn’t have the strength to make it work anymore. Thank the stars she stopped. I don’t know what Steven did, but I was able to work again. And then… I was free. And then I wasn’t. It kept being taken away from me. Each little moment I had. It felt so… Short. Honestly, the freedom from the ship to Malachite couldn’t have lasted a minute. I keep thinking that this is all the calm before the storm. Like the moment I feel safe, someone else is just going to trap me again.”

Peridot just stared at her. Trying to understand what she was saying. “Lapis…”

“I know. I know. I can’t live my life in fear. But I don’t know how to change it. How to tell my brain that I’m ok. And what if we aren’t ok? After what you did to Yellow Diamond. Who’s saying she won’t try and come to Earth and-“

“Lapis. I know there’s a lot of unknown. I know we may not be the safest. But we’re safe now. Right now we’re free and there’s no one attacking. And it’s ok. I don’t know how long it’ll last, and we will have to be prepared for if it does happen. But right now. We don’t. If we spend the moment we have of calm freaking out, we’ll regret it when we don’t have the calm anymore.”

Lapis sighed and leaned on Peridot’s shoulder “Yeah. I guess you’re right. But how.”

“We can watch an actual episode of Camp Pining Hearts.”

Lapis snorted “Yeah. Ok.” She stood up and helped Peridot up. “Thank you.”

“Of course Lapis.”

I SAW THE DGM PREMIERE !

 And let me tell you about it…

First thing first, the premiere was held at the Shinjuku Wald 9 and the theater was full (And no wonder because the day the general sales started, 2min after the opening of the online ticket booth, everything was sold). At the same time, a live-viewing was held at others theaters for people who couldn’t get a ticket here. At 2:15pm, the live host showed up, thanked everyone and announce the begining of the event. 
AND THE FIRST EPISODE OF D.GRAY MAN HALLOW STARTED !

Keep reading

Why "Alone Together" was the best episode so far.

Spoilers up ahead… 

You’ve been warned.

The first thoughts that come to mind after watching this episode was: “holy crap that was amazing”. Sorry for poor language, but that’s the truth. And here is my reasons why “Alone Together” was the most slam dunk episode yet. (slang?)

1. And yes. That deserves a reason on its own.

2. Steven wanted to help Connie feel better about her dancing abilities and She wanted to help him with his fusion abilities. Thus by creating a scene in which they coincide and become one. 

Which, by the way, is a very healthy relationship. Not only shown by their motives, it shows how they feel. MY theory, is that Steven can only fuse when the person he is fusing with can feel pure bliss at a moment while he is simultaneously feeling the same way. Either way, I felt that this was a major breaking through in the development of Connie’s character.

3.

New fusion.

4.

 

Mom Squad being the amazing mother she is. I, personally, really enjoyed how she encouraged Stevonie. (Which by they way, is the official canon name for shipping them. I’m looking at you weird side of the internet.) I also appreciated how she contrasted from Pearl who was scared of the the feat Steven had accomplished so soon.

5.

Two kids just having fun. 

6. 

This scene is equally hilarious as much as it brings up some confusion. Some of my friends have argued on whether or not Lars and Sadie were into Stevonie or if they were just stunned by its appearance. For me, I choose the latter because Steven is obviously very close to them, and they know about his gem. Ergo, I think that either 

A. They know it’s him fused.

B. They think it’s a new gem.

Or C. They are goofed and know nothing about what just happened. 

My money is on A.

7. 

Why do you think I chose the park bench scene? I will give you a second to think about it. Ok time’s over. The answer? Steven being the amazing person he is in this coming of age story. He asks Connie if she is still fine with the fusion, and is basically asking for her consent. (Which if you’re a spouse, do this. It may not seem like much, but it makes the relationship stronger by ensuring a bond of trust. Please, please, just do this) Therefore, causing their relationship to become stronger.

8. 

This is going to sound ludicrous, but man am I glad they included Connie having a panic attack. It shows how insecure and shy she really is. I am glad also, that panic attacks are acknowledged, because I don’t see them to an extent where somebody can be near tears. Rebecca and the Crew, thank you for acknowledging this detail.

9. 

ok, first off, sorry bout the quality. Second off, I’m so happy they brought this subject up! Well you’re gonna be like “Oh UUU you’re a cold hearted jerk.” Just listen. As you may have guessed, not many shows give out the idea that there is a possible predator that wants you. I mean, children watch the darn things. But that’s why I love this scene so much! It presents a challenge!

I have no idea how this scene passed through, but I’m so glad how it turned out. This shows people (primarily women I would assume) that people like this are a big no-no. And it teaches people (primarily men in this instance I would assume) to not be like this guy! I see no downside besides the awkwardness of the whole episode.

 This may be my favorite scene because let’s get real here. Not many networks, or even a network meant to bring in an adult audience, present this idea. I find it very exciting because 

A. It presents to children that there are more than just one shade of bad in the world.

B. Anytime somebody says cartoons are for children exclusively, I’m going to show them this scene.

and C: this happened. period. If they let this through, that means almost anything now is accepted by the network. 

and 10: the ending:

I personally think Connie and Steven were crazily laughing in the end because they were celebrating working together on magic, got closer together, and beat that creep.

Oh well! That’s just my opinion on the latest episode! I’m sure more like these will come by! I truly hope so! have a nice day folks!

Episode 12 theory

ok i was re-watching episode 12 when i noticed something 

in this part as everyone knows (well if you saw the episode) adrien enters the scene from the same direction that marinette did

but this is not the main point

 the reason why i’m talking about this is because there’s no other way to get to that place and yes we saw two stairs in the episode but if you go back to roger’s cop you can see this


and also if you look closer

there’s no way to get to that part because each stair leads to a different part of the place and what i mean with this is that

ladybug transformed back to marinette in that place and then she went downstairs and some seconds later ADRIEN WAS DOWNSTAIRS even tho he was the one to go first because his ring beeped 

i know it’s a crazy assumption but what i want to say is that THERE IS A CHANCE THAT ADRIEN WAS ABLE TO SEE LADYBUG WHEN SHE WAS TURNING INTO MARINETTE

because it’s really wierd that he was the first one to go out of the scene after they completed the mission and then he appears after marinette is back

(sorry if something is misspelled)

ok so you guys know that one scene in botfa?? the one where Legolas is like ‘i cant go back’ ?? yeah well i didn’t just notice this but if you watch Thranduil v carefully you can see that he’s shaking his head a little bit

his first reaction is like ‘no no no please don’t go, but then he thinks about his son’s happiness and decides if its what Legolas wants to do, he should accept it. instead of badgering him with questions or forbidding Legolas to leave, he accepts Legolas’ choice and only asks where he might go. you guys that is so important because it shows that Thranduil isn’t cold hearted or cruel; which is continued to be revealed when he and Legolas hug and when he speaks with Tauriel. when they hug, both of them show more love than is usually custom. Legolas is pretty much just reaching out and Thranduil looks like he’s trying to give Legolas something. Like a farewell from the heart. 

when Thranduil talks to Tauriel about her loss, he shows some compassion towards her. He literally contradicts what he said earlier by saying ‘Because it was real.’ he listens to her, and you can tell it’s not because he wants to be polite. he is wholeheartedly listening. this shows some of his soft side. maybe he was thinking about his wife. we can never be sure. actually im 100% positive thats what hes thinking about

so there’s my Thranduil appreciation post

sorry

{ gif credits to i dont know so claim if yours, @thranduilthings, and mikkelsening }

Thoughts..

Ok so this will probably get buried in the all the crap on here today (cause I made the mistake of peeking in my dash and saw that its still very annoying and all)  but since I feel like writing i’m gonna do it anyways and find something more fun to do than rip myself up over a tv show.  So there’s that.. now i’m just gonna write.. just you discuss something ;)

Ok? Good…

So I will say with all honesty this scene rips me up something awful because I just hate watching my favorite characters suffer.. It just hurts me to watch.

(gif by @oohhshiny)

Daryl digging another grave is painful to me cause it seems like he’s dug so many and you can see it on his face as well. The weariness of it.

Carol watching him tear himself inside, and drink to numb his senses while he’s doing it hurts me too. Sharing a painful that’s just becoming all to regular for them.

You see Daryl’s PTSD trigger was hit again, pretty damn hard too. Hell Dwight didn’t just hit the damn guilt  buttons he smashed the damn keyboard.  Its like a repetitive nightmare really. The same thing happening again and again. Good people dying and here he is Beth’s ‘last man standing’ still breathing air and feeling worse about himself every time.

Daryl is back in his room again, that one with the open that Eastman described so well. The one that Carol has been stuck in for quite a while herself. Hell maybe they have adjoining rooms.

Seems like it sometimes.

It occurred to me think about the seemingly repetive storyline from a new angle (one which doesn’t involve me ripping writers to shreds btw just concentrating on storyline here)  and how it is almost like PTSD nightmare shown visually on screen. I mean how many times has it happened now?  3 times at least right?

People who live in this kind of nightmare have triggers that just send them over the edge, back into their rooms so to speak. And every time its worse. It builds into this terrible place where you will do anything to try and feel better.  No matter what that is.

I cannot blame Daryl for the reaction he has to this, because its cumulative and this time hits most directly into the center of his guilt issue Something that was molded into him at a very young age.

This is all your fault.

It is overtaking every aspect of his thoughts and the very fact that he can’t even look up at Carol, who is on her own ledge.. and see that she is ready to bolt, tht she’d cracking too, that is not his fault either. When we are in pain, deep in the throws of it, sometimes we have a hard time seeing others suffering too.

Its just too damn heavy to lift your head up. Its just human nature really.

Carol is, in fact, lost so deeply in her own pain that she’s gonna run away, not thinking about the consquences of that  for other people. Just like Daryl, running off after Dwight, they are lost in their own heads and its pretty painful.

Just because it appears that Daryl leaves before Rick gets the note is no indicator of how he may feel if he learns she’s gone. We still don’t know that he won’t either. HE WILL CARE. That much I know for sure. Because he is the only one that HAS noticed, recently and in the past, when she is suffering, and even when she’s gone.

Right now, whether you like it not, he has his own issues to work out too. They BOTH stuck in their respective rooms and are the only one that can find their way out of them. It’s why it always takes so damn long with them.

They are both essentially running away in their own ways. Smoking, Drinking, Taking off on their own without much thought to possible consquences that may result.

They are both being as destructive to themselves as a result of the pain they are in. And yes its painful to watch with both of them (at least for me). But the glimmer I have in this is this..

They did not share 3 very honest, emotionally driven scenes in a key part of the season for NOTHING. They were not meaningless no matter what some may think about the story-telling or the writing..

It’s part of both their processes of healing. And its long and excrusiatingly painful yes, but I’m gonna stick it out (in spite of how I may feel about the writing and storytelling) because I’ve come to goddamn far with this characters to give up on either of them and the relationship to give up now.

Its just not in my fucking nature guys. Just saying.

So i’m just gonna sit here, ship, and root for these two to find their way out their rooms. And as I know in my heart, back together.

If that’s alright with all of you :)

Request – Derek Hale “Way to her heart”

 “Where are you going?” He called after her when she was suddenly leaving the room. Nothing special had happened, so he was quite surprised.
“I don’t need to see that…”, was the answer coming back.
“See what?” He looked at the television, but saw nothing special. Just a love scene, the ones you saw every night, on every show.
“The thing that’s on right now…”, she said back from the kitchen, where she’d run to. Suddenly, some things started to click in his mind. That time he had to search the entire town just before prom, only to find her hiding somewhere in a hotel room, mad at him for finding her? Her running out of the room when a love scene came on? It wasn’t the first time, when he was thinking about it. And whenever two of her friends who where together became close with each other, she came up with an excuse to get out, to find something in another room or at least be out of their sight. She’s afraid of love…
“Well… that can be a problem…”, he mumbled just to himself. He happened to like her. Maybe more than just like her, if he was completely honest with himself. But he hadn’t said or done anything with that. Partly because he was afraid to get close to someone again. It usually didn’t end well, especially for that someone, and he didn’t want that to happen. And partly because… because he didn’t know how she would react. And if he read all the signals correctly, it was a good thing he hadn’t said a thing, or she would have been running even further away than just to a hotel in Beacon Hills. He looked at the TV, saw that the couple was gone, and that there was some creepy scene in the woods going on.
“You can come out now! The creepy part is over!” She came back, glanced at the TV, and immediately looked away. She slapped him on the shoulder.
“You’re not funny! You know I can’t stand the suspense!” But you see a relieved look in her eyes. She seemed to be able to handle these scenes, but not the last.
“Come here…” He patted at the place next to him on the couch.” You can hide behind me if you’re too afraid. She listened to him, sat next to him and immediately buried her face in his shoulder.
“You’ll tell me when it’s over?”
“I will… can you tell me afterwards why you wanted to see this show, if you can’t handle half of it?” She peeked back at the TV, and immediately looked away again. “I didn’t tell you it was over, didn’t I? Your bad if you’ll have nightmares tonight!” The scene changed. “And now it’s safe.”
“Why I like to watch this show? Because it was a lot of fun before they started doing the scenes in these woods! It became way scarier!” He laughed at her.
“Well… then you just come here to watch it. I have a big back you can hide behind, and I have something to laugh at while watching.” She started laughing.
“You’re making fun of me! That’s not funny!” Maybe this was the right way to show her it could be ok that people cared about her. Maybe this was the way to her heart.
“You’re laughing, so it’s funny. And besides, You’ll have to agree that’s it’s way more fun to watch with friends.” There was no spoken answer, but the fact that she suddenly hid behind his back again was a good sign. It was a start.

Olicity Dialogue Flash Fic #2: Supreme Leader

A/N: got the idea for this just after watching SW:TFA on NYE and the piece of art from lordmesa-art. Posting now in honour of Star Wars day. May the fourth be with you.


“I can’t believe I missed Star Wars! Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for that?!”

“Yes I know. That’s why I used what little connections I have left to get this advanced copy for you.”

“Well aren’t you the best boyfriend ever.”

“Fiancé, remember?”

“Oh sorry, Fiancé. Now pass me the remote.”

“Painkillers first.”

“Fine.”


“Supreme Leader Snoke?!”

“You okay? Your face is bright red.”

“…”

“Felicity it’s not that funny.”

“…”

“Just what exactly is in those pain meds.”

“Snoke? I mean….come on… SNOKE?!”

“…”

“…”

“Felicity you’ve missed two scenes now. It’s not that funny.”

“But… SNOKE!”

“Yes I know-”

“SNOKE! Snoke, Snoke, Snoke.”

“Felici-”

“That’s my codename!”

“What?”

“From now on you must call me Supreme Leader Smoak!”

“Ok I think you need rest. Come on you can finish watching tomorrow.”

“No! Im watching it now. Look, see!”

“Wow you are a little crazy right now.”

“Excuse me?”

“What?”

“I got shot, Oliver. Shot. And I missed Star Wars. So if I wanna watch it whilst I’m as high as a kite on pain meds and I decide that Supreme Leader Smoak is my new code name, then that’s how it’s gonna be. Understand?”

“My apologies, supreme leader.”

“That’s more like it.”


Source

Tagging my lovelies: @olicitykisses @diggo26 @olicity-beautiful-dreamer @ohliverfelicity @welcometoadrianasworld @wilfulshipper @pharmalen @miriam1779 @mel-loves-all @lou-lou26 @florence-bubbles @lesanchea @lindsey8907 @aussieforgood @justokayskybluepinkviolinistcat @scu11y22 @smkkbert @sinceriouslymelodiful-09 @kathrynelizabeth89 @olicityfangirl @yryssss @olicityforeverqueen @theneekcave @all-things-olicity @arrowsgirlfriday @leagueofolicity17 @yespleasehawkeye @hopeful-warrior @andjustforthismoment @ruwithmeguys @olicitylovemaking @emilybettqueen @velvetsteel

Ok, so every week Clarke watches the Walking Dead with Raven and Octavia. Since Clarke met Lexa, Lexa is always there too and when she isn’t, Clarke misses her. These POV’s are entirely new scenes that go with my fic, Unsung heart which can be found here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/5813827/chapters/13397812 Thanks @jaelle90 for helping as always:)

Clarke POV 5

Clarke - You suck

Lexa - I do indeed and very well I might add.

Clarke - Lexa:( I mean you’re not here to watch the Walking Dead and I miss you.

Lexa - I miss you too:( But I have to practice.

Clarke - You never practice on Walking Dead night and aren’t you like the head of your band? Who made this stupid decision?

Lexa - *points at herself and looks around awkwardly*

Clarke - You mean you did this! Oh my god, I’m disowning you.

Lexa - Fine, but who’s gonna save your ass during the zombie apocalypse?

Clarke - I’ll save my own ass thank you very much. I am rather fierce.

Lexa - Well ok…sure…leather jacket, motorbike and gun, I can see it.

Clarke - Yeah, while you wonder around flailing at the zombies with a baseball bat…

Lexa - I would not “flail” Griffin. I swear to god, I’m not a girl who “flails.”

Clarke - Really? Are we still talking about attacking zombies?

Lexa - Haha, you know what I mean.

Clarke - Do I?

Lexa - Clarke I’m sorry I’m not there. I can come over when practice is over but it’ll be late and I know you’re at school early?

Clarke - Do it, do it, do it. We can watch the episode together before bed.

Lexa - You’ll have just watched the episode you goof.

Clarke - Yeah, but then we can update our zombie apocalypse survival plan.

Lexa - You realize what huge dorks it makes us to have a survival plan, right?

Clarke - You mean what a huge dork it makes you? It was your idea and there ain’t no denying that.

Lexa - I argue vehemently that it was *our* idea. You must be confused.

Clarke grinned widely.

Clarke - Oh yeah, I don’t remember you turning to me with bright shiny eyes, gripping my shoulders and saying “Clarke, we have to make a plan, like a proper survival plan so we are the survivors.”

Lexa - You’re absolutely right. You *don’t* remember that.

Clarke - Hey, no need to be shy. My wild support of the plan was just as enthusiastic as your suggestion.

Lexa - Now that I remember.

Clarke bit her lip and stared at her phone, sighing. She wasn’t ever really sure why she was sighing, just that she really wished Lexa were there. Raven and Octavia side eyed her, but she ignored them.

Clarke - Please come over when you’re done.

Lexa - Of course.

Lexa - I mean what if the Zombie apocalypse starts tonight and we’re not completely ready?

Clarke - That would be bad. Really bad.

Lexa - Indeed it would. Are you sure?

Clarke - Yes. Don’t make me beg.

Lexa - If I say no, you’ll beg? Ooh, the possibilities.

Clarke - Lexa, come over. Please.

Lexa - Wow Clarke. Easy much?

Clarke felt her cheeks flush, and her smile grew.

Clarke - Whatever. Come, don’t come…I’m not fussed.

Lexa - Wow, and I always imagined you as a lover would be all about the coming….

Clarke - Oh my god Lexa!

Lexa - You make it too easy.

Clarke - I’m a fucking stupendous lover.

Lexa - I’m sure.

Clarke - And I didn’t miss the fact that you’ve imagined what kinda lover I am;)

Clarke gripped her phone close to her chest and awaited Lexa’s response.

Lexa - Haha, ok…glad to hear I didn’t get it wrong.

Clarke bit her lip because Lexa didn’t deny it.

Clarke - You didn’t. And are you coming or not?

Lexa - This conversation has been fun and all but I take a little more work to come…

Clarke laughed out loud.

Clarke - Are you coming over to mine after practice dumbass?

Lexa - Yes. I am:)

Clarke - Good. I miss you.

Lexa - I miss you too.

Clarke held her phone close to her chest smiling, before the smile fell from her face and she sighed yet again and tried to refocus on the Walking Dead. Her motivation was poor however and she huffed a little.

‘What the fuck is the matter with you?’ Raven grumbled from beside her. It was tradition that Clarke watch the Walking Dead with a Raven and Octavia, and since meeting Lexa, Lexa too. They tried to watch it live and together, at Clarke’s place usually. As the one with the early starts she’d argued that by watching at hers, when everyone else left she could simply drop into bed and thus function the next day.

‘Rae’s right princess. You’ve been grouchy all night,’ Octavia leaned around Raven to stare at her.

‘I’m not grouchy,’ she growled, grouchily, hating herself for not hiding her emotions better.

'I think someone is missing their bestie,’ Raven rolled her eyes and Clarke glared at her.

'Wow, I think you’re right,’ Octavia began to laugh. 'Clarke’s all pouty 'cause Lexa isn’t here.’

Clarke felt her cheeks burn and tried to come up with some sort of opposition to the accusation but instead sat there gaping at her two friends staring at her.

'Oh my god, you are!’ Raven crowed triumphantly. 'Pay up bitch,’ she held out her hand to Octavia.

'That’s just not…not true,’ Clarke stammered, 'and why the hell does she have to pay you?’

'I’m paying her because Raven said you were arse over tits for Lexa and I said you were just crushing on her, but fuck…yeah…you’re in way deep.’

'I’m not “in deep,”’ Clarke huffed, denial coiling in her belly.

'At least she admits she’s in,’ Raven smirked.

'I didn’t,’ Clarke pulled a cushion and held it over her face, desperately trying to get a hold of her wayward thoughts. 'I just…I like hanging out with her…and she’s pretty funny when we’re watching the Walking Dead…’

'And you like to bury your face in her neck when you get scared,’ Raven pointed out.

'She smells good,’ Clarke defended, pressing her burning face deeper into the cushion. 'Fuck.’

'Fuck?’ Octavia asked.

Clarke dropped the cushion and stared at them, eyes wide, 'she smells really, really, really good.’

'We know,’ her friends stated in perfect unison. Clarke closed her eyes for a second,

'But I mean, really, really good.’

'Yeah?’ Octavia was softer this time, less cocky. Raven was cocky personified, shit-eating grin all over her face.

'Fuck,’ Clarke huffed back into the cushion, as Raven paused the television,

'Fuck, you’re gay? Yeah we know,’ she pulled the cushion from Clarke’s red face.

'I am not gay,’ Clarke tried to pull the cushion back from Raven and they ended up fighting for it over the top of Octavia.

'Stop,’ Octavia slammed her hands onto the cushion and held it on her lap. 'Look Clarke, she makes you happy.’

'Of course she does, she’s my friend,’ Clarke protested, sinking back into her couch.

'We’re your friends,’ Octavia pointed out. 'We’ve been your friends for a long time. And yet we’re not friends like she’s your friend.’

'We just get on really well….like you know, a meeting of minds or whatever,’ Clarke tried to explain.

'Yes,’ Raven agreed, 'you’re crazy quick and sparky in your conversation and you talk to her about stuff because she’s just so easy to talk to, and all that. We’re not going to deny it’s a meeting of minds, but…’

'But?’ Clarke leaned forward to look at Raven who had paused.

'You’re both flirty as all hell and the chemistry is insane. I mean holy crap Clarke, you’re gushy and starry eyed, and fixated on her. It’s funny. It’s cute. And it’s fucking gay as hell.’

'Fuck off Rae,’ Clarke growled, feeling Octavia put a hand on her forearm,

'Look Clarke, it’s just…why are you worried? You have a crush. A big crush. That’s ok. I’ve had them before. You’ve had them before. You think she’s gorgeous. I mean, you stare at her and go on about it all the time, so I figure even you’ve recognized that. Maybe…maybe there’s just a little more to this friendship than you’re…’

'But there isn’t. Because I’m straight, right?’

'Clarke there’s a whole spectrum of sexuality out there, as you know,’ Raven stood up and moved around to sit on the other side of Clarke. 'Just because you like guys, doesn’t mean you can’t like girls too.’

'I know,’ Clarke huffed, 'but come on…sex with a girl? I mean Lexa is fucking hot but I’m not sure I could…with her bits and yeah,’ she flushed bright red, struggling to explain.

'You couldn’t touch her boobs? Which I quote, “are perfect and hot?”’ Octavia’s brow furrowed.

'You practically wrote poetry about them Clarke,’ Raven pointed out.

'Ok, fine, yes…I like boobs. And yeah…sometimes there is this…chemistry between us.’

'You mean all the time,’ Raven interjected.

'I just don’t think I could have sex with a girl, you know?’ she looked up at them.

'I’m sorry Clarke, but you’re so into her it’s painful,’ Raven shook her head.

'What Raven means is…maybe you could try? Because we may have noticed the chemistry, the flirtation and the fact that you’re always staring at her.’

'I don’t know,’ Clarke looked down, 'I mean, fuck…sometimes I can’t stop looking at her, and god I like to be close which I know we decided is Lexa and not the heavenly smell, but maybe we just…you know like each other? I mean, I could be confused just because she’s gorgeous and gay and like my personality soulmate?’

'Your soulmate?’ Octavia’s jaw dropped and Clarke watched her gape.

'Well duh,’ Raven rolled her eyes at them both.

'And anyway, she’s not interested in me that way,’ Clarke shrugged, offended when both of her friends began to laugh. In fact laugh was not a term for the hyperventilating gafawing of Raven.

'You’re an idiot,’ Raven huffed in air and Clarke stared at her, lip curled in a slight snarl,

'Look, she doesn’t ok?’

'What Raven is trying to say is that she does have a certain way of looking at you that would indicate she might have feelings for you,’ Octavia stated carefully.

'And what way is that?’ Clarke crossed her arms over her chest, a surge of protectiveness for Lexa making her feisty.

'We call them heart eyes. All longing and full of love.’

'Of course she loves me, I’m her best friend,’ Clarke snarked.

'Yeah…that’s not it,’ Octavia explained as a Raven continued to gasp. 'It’s more like her world starts and ends with you…’

'Yeah?’ Clarke couldn’t deny the increased rate of her heart, nor the swirl of anticipation in her stomach. She couldn’t even deny the throb of desire between her legs. She might not be brave enough to do anything with it, but she could acknowledge it. In fact it wouldn’t be ignored. Then her brow furrowed,

'She’s not friends with me for that reason,’ it was a statement not a question because she knew Lexa wasn’t. They were in a mutual infatuation friendship. An infatuation that only ever grew stronger and better the longer they knew each other.

'No, no, of course not. Like Rae said, it’s a meeting of minds. But why not see if there’s something? I mean, I’ll back up the notion that she’s your soulmate. You spent the last couple of years sleeping with my brother on and off and there’s nothing there compared to you and Lexa. I mean I know you like him, but honestly, you see Lexa and you light up.’

'And she does the same,’ Raven shrugged.

'I just don’t think she’d want something,’ Clarke attempted, her mind too full for her to function properly.

'Yeah, she would,’ Raven interrupted.

'But I’m not sure I would,’ Clarke began. 'I can’t experiment on her. I mean…’ Clarke trailed off, trying to find words to explain how she’d always crushed on girls, just not as epically as she was crushing on Lexa. But that she couldn’t be gay or bi because she couldn’t imagine sex, because the thought of vagina’s kind of grossed her out.

'I think when you feel like this, it’s not experimenting,’ Octavia attempted.

'I can’t hurt her,’ Clarke grabbed the cushion from Octavia’s lap and hugged it tight. 'I don’t want to hurt her. If she does have feelings…which I don’t think she does…’

'Clarke seriously, she’s gay as fuck, stares at you, adores you and you really think she doesn’t have feelings? You’re straight and you’ve got feelings so strong you’re a mess and fucking missing the Walking Dead because you can’t focus without her here,’ Raven was blunt as always.

'I can’t just work out my confusion with her.’

'But…’

'No I can’t. I don’t even like vagina’s. They smell and are kind of gross,’ Clarke attempted to vocalize.

'Personally I like mine,’ Raven shrugged. 'And she doesn’t smell.’

'You know what I mean,’ Clarke rolled her eyes.

'Why don’t you talk to her about how you’re feeling? I mean, surely your gay best friends is the perfect person to talk to about this stuff? We know she loves vagina,’ Raven laughed but Clarke didn’t feel like laughing. She could be lighthearted about some stuff, but this was about who she was and the confusion was killing her. Her favourite thing in the world was to be with Lexa, and now being with Lexa was filled with this unbearable tension of wanting. A wanting she didn’t understand or know how to process, or even what to do with it. It was so easy for both Raven and Octavia to squash her friendship with Lexa into a box labeled attraction or even love, but it wasn’t just that.

'Aaaargh,’ she growled in frustration and both Octavia and Raven laughed, much to her chagrin. 'It’s not funny. Lexa is…she’s really, really important to me. Fucking up what we have is not what I want to do.’

'It might not fuck it up though,’ Raven sobered appropriately. 'I will say that Lexa - she’s one hundred percent committed to this friendship and she would never put a foot over that line. Ever. Except if you wanted it.’

'But I’m not sure I want it? I mean I’ve had crushes on girls before but they were just crushes. Right?’ she stared at them, hoping they would untangle the mess in her head.

'We can’t answer. I mean…maybe you’re bisexual. Are your feelings for Lexa sexual?’ Octavia asked and stared at her. Clarke’s mind filled with Lexa, those abs of hers, and her smile, the way she looked in pyjama shorts and a tank and her body lurched pleasantly, especially when she thought about pressing her face into the nape of Lexa’s neck.

'No,’ she responded and both of her friends eyes widened with scepticism. 'Yes, fine ok…but that doesn’t make me bisexual.’

'Lexa is one of the hottest girls I’ve ever seen, but she doesn’t turn me on,’ Octavia informed her gently and it irritated Clarke,

'Look maybe I think she’s gorgeous and there’s chemistry between us, but thinking about kissing her and actually kissing her are two different things. So I find girls attractive, sure I do, and maybe I have crushes, but this…it’s different, and fuck…I can’t imagine sleeping with her. The two of us in bed together maybe…but when I think of sex, I think of a penis.’

'Maybe because you always have,’ Raven offered up and Clarke glared at her,

'What’s that mean?’

'Just that. Maybe you think of a penis because you’ve only ever had sex with guys, only ever considered sex with guys. Dismissed your attraction for girls as “crushes.” Maybe penis is the logical thought pattern because society shoves it down your throat. Maybe you think you need a guy sexually because it’s nearly all heterosexual couples getting the happy ever after in films and on tv. Maybe you’ve just never allowed yourself to think about vagina’s in a different way.’

'This conversation feels so weird using such medical terms,’ Octavia wrinkled her nose.

'A penis is still a cock and a vagina is still a pussy,’ Clarke channeled her inner Lexa for that one. 'Terms don’t matter.’

'Says the doctor. Doesn’t it feel all medical?’ Raven asked.

'Whatever,’ Clarke needed help and digressing provided none.

'Look Clarke, Rae has a point. Maybe open yourself up to the possibility that you’re not quite as straight as you’ve always believed. You and Lexa…there’s clearly something there. She’s your friend. She’s strictly your friend but she would be more, definitely. There’s just no way she’s not attracted to someone she thinks is gorgeous, funny, clever, talented and her best friend in all the world,’ Octavia shrugged and Clarke sank back into the couch. The truth was she thought Lexa was the gorgeous one, the funny one, clever, talented and her best friend in all the world, and she was attracted to her. That wasn’t the issue.

'What do I do with the attraction?’ she voiced, ’my attraction? how do I work out what it means?’

'Talk to your best friend.’

'I’m talking to my best friends,’ Clarke pointed out.

'Yeah, we mean that girl you met six months ago. The one you talk about all the time, the one you lie curled up into when we watch tv, the one you’re always with, the one who smells amazing, the one you’re kinda obsessed with. The best friend that’s gay as fuck and probably might offer a few more practical solutions to your confusion,’ Raven pointed out.

'I can’t do that to her!’ Clarke protested.

'I think she’d be thrilled if you did that to her,’ Raven cackled and Clarke gritted her teeth,

'Yeah, because having your best friend ignore all potential for hurt, stomp over the boundaries between you, never mind pretend like there’s nothing wrong with asking to test out feelings…that’s a great idea.’

'Woah Clarke, I get all that. I do,’ Raven hushed her. 'But it’s her you’re attracted to. Why don’t you just ask to kiss her.’

'Kiss her?’ Clarke gaped at her. She couldn’t see how that would help anything.

'Yes, you know as friends. Talk to her about your confusion and say you want to kiss a girl. Ask her. It can’t be the first time someone’s asked her.’

'That feels wrong.’

'She’ll do it and maybe it’ll clear things up for you. That would help, right? I mean what if…what if you kiss her and you realize that it is sexual attraction that you absolutely want to go somewhere? You two would be amazing together. There isn’t anyone that’s seen the two of you together that doesn’t think that,’ Octavia said carefully.

'I just…I don’t know. It feels like an inappropriate ask.’

'Look, be honest and tell her you have a crush on her then. Why not? Or you want to play it safer than that? You wanna kiss me?’ Raven asked. 'You want to stick your tongue in my mouth? I’d be fine with it,’ she shrugged. Clarke stared at her friend who looked very serious. The truth was she didn’t want to kiss Raven. Raven was gorgeous, absolutely no doubt about it and yeah, she’d stared at her a little longer than entirely appropriate at times, like when she bent over, but she didn’t want to kiss her. She wanted to kiss Lexa. She really wanted to know, to clarify her confusion, to know who she was and that really could only ever be with Lexa because it was tied up with her. She thought back to that moment when she’d been staring into Lexa’s eyes, assessing their colour or even dancing with her. The urge had been overwhelming.

'No I don’t want to kiss you,’ she admitted.

'Because you love Lexa,’ Raven stated with no small amount of glee. 'And she’s in love with you.’

'Of course I love Lexa,’ Clarke rolled her eyes, dismissing the second part of what Raven said,

'I think it’s the kind of love we’re debating,’ Octavia assessed. 'Right?’

'I don’t know,’ Clarke covered her face.

'Look, baby steps Clarke. If the situation presents itself just ask her. What’s the harm?’ Octavia asked and Raven nodded her agreement.

Part 5 continued: http://tabithacraft.tumblr.com/post/141345392088/so-this-is-just-small-mini-scene-i-added-as-it-was

I’m quite disappointed with this fandom

Well with one of it’s parts anyway. 

I mean, I’m a whouffaldi shipper too, as you may know. It’s my biggest OTP ever and I don’t think any will ever beat it. 

OK, this episode. I won’t lie, it was… oh I don’t think I can describe it with words. Fantastic? Brilliant? One of the best ever? And we all know the reason why.

What I don’t understand is… how can anyone, who watched it… who watched the WHOLE thing, that speech, every scene… just go to tumblr and complain about Twelve and Clara not kissing. I mean… you’ve just seen it, ok, maybe you wasn’t so speechless as I was, I don’t know, and after all that, all you have in mind, is “I want my whouffaldi kiss”. I don’t want to point at anyone.

So that’s all you’ve taken from THAT episode? There, not-being a kiss between your OTP?

Maybe I’m just weird.

Translation: Personal Book, “Special Talk” with Yuzuki Reon

Translation of the Special top-star interview with former top-star, Yuzuki Reon from Suzuho’s personal book, released in August (2015). 

A special note before reading… translating this was extremely difficult. So please take what you read with a grain of salt, I’m not confident I actually captured everything correctly. (Also special thanks to my beta readers who gave me a ton of help <3) I mean… it actually got to the point half way through that I almost gave up. It didn’t help that a certain someone would not. stop. talking. in excessive amounts of Kansai-ben while dropping every other subject from their sentences……..

Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy reading the ‘crying series’…

Keep reading