well it was worth the try

anonymous asked:

RFA + V and Saeran react to overhearing MC's family scold her because they despise who she's dating? Maybe they think they aren't successful and responsible enough or not loyal or trustworthy or feel like MC deserves far better than what she's getting our of them? Specifically I'd like to see Saeyoung's reaction given his insecurities.

And we’re back! Did you guys miss some scenarios?

Hope you like this! ^^

RFA + Saeran and V finding MC’s family disapproval

Zen

  • “Sweetie, I just think he’s playing with you.”
  • He heard that coming from your father when you two were washing the dishes in the kitchen, Zen noticed you two forgot a plate and was bringing it to the kitchen.
  •  “And what makes you think that, dad?” “Well, he’s handsome, I bet he has tons of women running after him. Maybe famous women? What makes you think he won’t dump you for some famous actress? He’s a public figure, honey, his image is everything. Plus… he sounds shallow like that.”
  • Shallow? Zen could deal with being called narcissist, workaholic, but… shallow? He was sounding shallow to your father?
  • He wanted to walk into the kitchen, maybe subtly, maybe not. He wish he had some really witty and smart statement to give so your father would realize he wasn’t just image
  • And he was about to step into the kitchen when he finally heard your voice: “If he sounds shallow, maybe you didn’t pay attention enough to what he was saying, dad. Have you listened to his story? His problems with his family? The way he struggled when he started his career as an actor? Have you heard when he told you how much he loves me and how guilty he feels that we’re still not married? Come on, dad. Either you weren’t listening, or you don’t know what shallow means.”
  •  “But, honey…” “His family is broken enough, dad. Let’s not break ours too just because you’re seeing Zen as just another actor, not as the man I chose to share my life with.”
  • Zen could almost cry right there. How did he manage to find someone who can see so deep inside him? Yeah, he definitely likes being known for his looks, but the fact you see beyond them is really overwhelming.
  • When you two are saying goodbye to your father, he gives a firm handshake to the man.  “I hope we can spend more time together, sir.”
  • “I would like that a lot. I see you have a bike, what brand is it?” that goodbye turned into a long conversation about bikes, which was super boring to you, but seeing them bonding was worth it.

Yoosung

  • “I honestly thought it was a joke when you introduced him as your boyfriend, sis.”
  • He heard when you and your sister were in your bedroom trying to find something for you to wear, Yoosung accidentally spilled wine on you.
  • “Shut up.” “No, I’m serious! What are you thinking, MC? He seems like a teenage mama’s boy. Look at what he did to your shirt, he’s so clumsy and… nerve-wracking! You’ll have to play his mommy all the time!”
  • Well, it’s not like he haven’t thought about himself like that before, but listening when it comes from another person, that person being someone who grew up with you hurts a lot more.
  • His first instinct was head out of there without anybody noticing he’s gone. But… then your sister would be completely right.
  • “He just spilled wine on me because his spatial notion is still a little compromised due to his eye. Have I told you he hurt his eye trying to protect me, sis? And yeah, he’s still a little nervous because he doesn’t know my family too well, but your hostility definitely won’t help him calming down. If you’ weren’t such a bitch, maybe you would have noticed by now he’s an amazing smart man that makes me really happy.”
  • “You just called me a bitch because of that guy?” “I did, just so you know how serious I am about him, to the point I’m fighting with my favorite person in the world.”
  • Well, he’s glad he didn’t run and stayed to listen to this. You made him sound like a really cool reliable guy, the type of man he’s trying to be for you.
  • After you and your sister go back to the living room, she makes sure to sit next to you two. “So wait… you asked her to be your pre-girlfriend before you got together? Oh my God, that’s so adorable…”
  • Then you two kept squealing over that photo of his with the roses, and though he’s super embarrassed, he couldn’t help feeling a little smug when your sister said ”Huh, I wish my boyfriend were like this.”

Jaehee

  • “She seems a little cold, MC. Are you sure she really likes you?”
  • She heard when you and your brother were setting the table while she was talking to your parents in the living room, she decided she needed to help as well.
  • “Ugh, don’t even start, bro.” “I’m not saying this to be an ass! Come on, MC, she’s so formal! She’s almost like a granny, you’ll get bored if you stay with her! This if she doesn’t dump you first, she seems cold like that.”
  •  You warned her about your brother’s brutal honesty, but this still felt unexpectedly hurtful.
  • She was really trying to loosen up, and she honestly felt she was doing a good job, at least next to you and to your friends, maybe she wasn’t and people close to you were feeling she wasn’t real about your relationship?
  • “She’s been working her ass off on a very strict company basically since she graduated, she’s still learning to loosen up. You would have noticed this if you weren’t so desperate about finding something to complain about my girlfriend, as you typically do.”
  • “Jeez, MC, calm down! I’m just worried for you.” “I appreciate it, but you’re the one boring me right now, let’s end this before I stop feeling bored and end up getting angry.”
  • She can’t help feeling this warmth growing inside her. Knowing that you are willing to fight for her like this is amazing! Not only because she never had that before, but also because it’s you.
  • Your brother decides to talk a little more to her. “Whooooa, so you’re a judo blackbelt? That’s awesome! You gotta teach me some moves!”
  • Well, giving this guy an ippon after he pissed you off would satisfy her more than she cared to admit.


Jumin

  • “Are you sure this is a healthy relationship, honey?”
  •  Your mother asked you when you two were making dinner while he was setting the table, as you asked him, but he didn’t know where to find the forks.
  •  “What do you mean, ma?” “I mean, he seems so intimidating and, everything is happening so fast, you barely know each other and are already engaged, he seems very intense, for that matter.”
  • Well, he was indeed very intense, but… intimidating? He never wanted to come across as intimidating, not to you, not to the woman who raised you.
  • Was he intimidating you to the point you were feeling pressured to get married?
  •  “Mom, I know what you’re trying to say. He’s not like dad, okay? Yes, he is very intense, just because he never had the chance to express his feelings like all of us do.“
  • “Well, your father wasn’t good at expressing feelings either, then he expressed with actions…” “Ma, Jumin would never hurt me, emotionally or physically. I know you might be thinking I’m on a cycle, that I have daddy issues, but… just give him a chance, okay? Let him prove he is nothing like my father.”
  • He was really sad for you and your mother. Two amazing women were suffering due to a man’s behavior, this was awful in so many levels…
  • He walks into the kitchen, pretending he didn’t hear a thing. “Why don’t you just rest while MC and I cook, maam?”
  • “Oh wow, what a gentleman… nothing like her father.” He smiled genuinely, neither of the women were feeling intimidated by that smile.

Saeyoung

  • “Your mother and I think you deserve better.”
  • Your father says when you were helping him changing a light bulb, Saeyoung decided to help when he heard this.
  • “Why would you think that, dad?” “Sweetie, he’s a train wreck! He’s immature, irresponsible, you told me how rude he acted with you. How can you be sure he won’t start pushing you away again?”
  • Of course he knew how immature and irresponsible he was, but he never really thought about what if he started getting snappy to you again. He promised he wouldn’t, but… was he good at keeping promises? Ask his brother.
  •  If he had any good sense, he would walk away and pretend he didn’t listen to any of this. He was already immature and irresponsible, he didn’t need o be nosy as well.
  • “He just pushed me away because he was worried and pretty sure he would die at any moment back then, dad. He was scared, he’s been scared his whole life! Have I told you what kind of hell he and his brother grew up at?”
  • “Sweetie, it still doesn’t justify…” “It does to me. He is scared and willing to change for me, I know that because I trust him. Can’t you trust the man your daughter loves? Not even a little?”
  • Well, if you asked him anything with that tone, he would oblige without thinking… ugh, you’re so sweet, so lovely, so caring… he can never push you away again! Not right now his life is so great with you and his brother, but it isn’t perfect, since your parents don’t like him…
  • “I’ll be honest with you, son. I still don’t trust you, but my daughter does and she never failed her judgments, that, and only because of that, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.” You looked at him and smiled.
  • “Thank you, sir. I’ll prove it will be worth it.” Not so immature and irresponsible right now, is he?

Saeran

  • “MC, listen to me, this guy is trouble!”
  • He heard this through the baby monitor when you and your sister went to check on her son.
  • “Why are you saying this?” “MC, he is… creepy! Are you dating him to punish dad? Look at him, he looks like he’s on the edge of a mental breakdown! Are you sure you want to play his nurse forever?”
  • He wasn’t on the edge of a mental breakdown! At least not now… at least not since you came along, but there were a few says, though…
  • Your sister is so right! He’s so weird and creepy, he doesn’t deserve you at all! Why did he even think he could handle trying to be normal and do normal things with you?
  • “I’m not playing his nurse! I like to help him because I love him, and he had mental break downs in the past, you would have too if you were locked up and forced to drugs after growing up with an abusive mother. All he needs is support and a loving family, not this… judgment from you!”
  • “MC, calm down, I was just…” “I know you’re concerned, but focus your concern on helping me give him what he needs. If you have nothing else nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
  • Saeran didn’t hear any of this, he hid in the bathroom when you two left the bay’s bedroom and kept talking as you walked into the living room.
  • Then you two heard the baby crying through the baby monitor, but he quickly stopped, you two found it odd and went to check on him.
  • He was fine, Saeran was holding him. “Am… Am I doing this right?” Making yours and your sister’s heart explode from sweetness? Yep, he was doing this right.

V

  • “What are you even thinking dating this guy, MC?”
  • Your brother asked you when V went to the toilet, he got lost and tried to get back to ask your brother where was it, exactly.
  • “What do you mean?” “I mean, he’s an old blind man, MC! You’re wasting your youth with a guy like this, he won’t be able to keep it up with you!”
  • V already thought about it, yes, you were so young, did you really need to take such a responsibility by dating him?
  • And that coming from your brother, who sounded so worried… he hated being a burden and provoking this arguing between two family members…
  • “He’s just one year older than you, so chill. And what century are we in? Do you think just because he’s blind, he’s not able to have a normal life? Dude, we’re planning a trip to Italy for my birthday, I think that’s pretty normal, don’t you?”
  •  “MC, take I easy, I’m just…” “You’re concerned, but you don’t have to.  He’s pretty good by himself, and he’s independent, he doesn’t need me, yet he wants me, and I want him, so there’s nothing for you to worry about.”
  • He needed you, maybe not to do things for him, yes. But he needed you because he loved you, and he was so happy that you were so sure about him not being a burden.
  • You were saying goodbye, when your brother said: “I’m sorry, dude.”
  • “If you want to apologize, apologize for stressing her out. As for me, don’t worry, I’ll make sure to bring you a gift from Italy as a peace offer.”
dark and host headcanons cuz i live for angst

k so first of all HUGE trigger warning for abuse like if ur sensitive for this stuff don’t read this. second of all this was inspired by both my own expreciences and @alcordraws headcanons

- the way dark abuses the host is extremely subtle, unless you’re very close to the host himself you will probably never even know it’s happening

- but underneath the surface there is an endless cycle going on

- dark treats him like a friend, but if host says anything he doesnt like he completely ignores him until the host says sorry even though he doesnt want to.

- the host has to basically walk on eggs around dark, constantly scared to say the wrong thing

- dark almost never actually beats him but has no problem yelling at him when they’re alone.

- he will grab him by the wrist and drag him to a secluded area, preferably dark’s own office because nobody will come in

- whenever this happens he tears off the host’s bandage to remind him of how vulnerable he is

- making the host wait is his preferred way of keeping him in check

- he will make the host wait hours for a response to a text even though he has plenty of time to respond. he knows it makes the host more vulnerable to manipulation when he has been desperate for darks attention for hours on end.

- however if the host doesn’t respond to a text from dark within 5 minutes, all hell breaks loose. 

- this causes the host to constantly be on edge because he doesn’t want to make dark angry. (he actually slowly starts leaving his house less so he can be there as soon as dark texts him)

- when he does leave his house dark will demand a check up every half hour, needing a picture where he can see where he is and with who.

- wilford and the others try to make him realise what dark is doing to him but he brushes it off. i mean, dark is just worried about his well-being, right?

-dark notices this and starts telling him to stop hanging out with the other ego’s. they just want me away from you because they don’t like me, they’re trying to start drama. don’t listen to them.

- host continues to secretly talk to the other ego’s but when dark finds out he is pissed. he yells at him, tell him that he should’ve just left him to die in that stupid shed, that he hates him, that he’s not worth ANYTHING and that nobody else will ever care about him.

- after that he completely ignores the host for a month and it drives him crazy, he’s already been pushed away from his friends too much to talk to them and dark ignores him, getting mad at him for as much as trying to say hi to him. 

- until one day he suddenly starts treating the host as his friend again and even though he doesnt even like dark anymore at this point, he just goes along because he’s fully convinced dark is the only one that cares about him

- dark is the only one who can ever have attention no matter what happens to the host dark. goes. first.

idk i’m not good with words i hope this was sort of okay-ish

anonymous asked:

Hi Sam, hope you don't mind a question regarding the cooking on weekends and how you approach your lunches. Do you find this way of eating more cost effective? I'm trying to cut the amount of money I spend on food during the work week and your way definitely seems more money friendly.

Well, I mean…more cost effective than what, I guess is the question. Certainly it’s cheaper than buying your lunch every day. Packing a sandwich every day would probably be cheaper than the food I make, but that’s hard to quantify. (Two weeks’ worth of peanut butter sandwiches is definitely cheaper than two weeks’ worth of chicken enchiladas, pulled pork with mashed potatoes, and macaroni with meatballs, but only works if you really love peanut butter sandwiches.) (Actually I feel like I could go for an almond butter sandwich with apple butter, that might be dinner tonight.)

I think the main consideration with the way I have things arranged is “will you eat the food”. You have to pack foods you’re going to want to eat, foods you like, or foods you know you’ll have the energy to prepare if they need preparation. It’s no good packing a lunch if you don’t eat it – once in a while I have a week where I’ll forget a few meals or be out sick and then, really, that food is wasted. After a week in the fridge, I tend to toss whatever’s left because it’s usually a bit iffy by then. That’s why I freeze what I don’t take for lunch, because that’s next week’s lunch and needs to stay edible in the meantime. 

So you may have to work out what you’ll eat in place of going out to eat, and while that may be cheaper than going out, it may also be more expensive than your absolute cheapest option. 

And I also feel like…you know, if you’re aware that you’re always going to want potato chips for lunch, and if you find yourself buying chips from the vending machine instead of eating the lunch you brought…lean into that. Accept it. Buy snack bags of potato chips in a pack and bring them from home so that at least you’re not overpaying. There are worse things in life than eating potato chips for lunch. 

And the thing is, one reason all this works for me is that I really like cooking large amounts over the course of a day – I hate cooking a single meal for one person, so my dinners are almost always reheated leftovers. If I’m in the kitchen I want to be like…IN THE KITCHEN, making shitloads of food all at once. I much prefer cooking five or six different dishes on a weekend to cooking one of those dishes each night for a week, even. I don’t know why, it’s just how I operate. So you also should be aware of how you function in the kitchen, both in terms of ability and in terms of preference, and let that guide you as well. 

And before y'all brush that idea off like “there is no Dark Jedi”, behold the admittedly now apocryphal “Book of Sith” talking about the Dark Jedi.

REMEMBER: there are MORE factions in the force than just jedi and sith. A branch of the Dark Jedi, according to this book, actually broke away, overcame the Sith race, and *became them*, appropriating their culture for their own and taking advantage of their harsher teachings and techniques.

I would argue that Maz, too, is of a more downplayed neutral force faction, and then we also have whatever Snoke is and what he’s trying to train Kylo up to be…

The Dark Jedi could very well still be a thing, and if del Toro’s unnamed character has been labeled “DJ” and we’ll “see what that means later”, I think it’s worth considering.

If Dark Jedi make a revival, then I think that gives us pretty good footing to go forward with the idea of The Gray for Rey and Ben.

anonymous asked:

THANKS FOR DRAGGING ME INTO KIRALFONSE HELL, now I'm imagining Alfonse going with her home and being so totally confused and out of place but seeing how happy Kiran is makes it all worth it for him,, like imagine him trying to go to the mall or university with her I'm just. AAAAAA I love them???? And it's all your fault

U KNOW DAMN WELL HES SO HAPPY TO SEE HER HAPPY EVENTHO HES CONFUSED AS FUCK!!! cute as hell but also funny coz kiran (to be specific my version of summoner) is kinda sarcastic n sometimes use grim jokes n sadly the jokes go over alfonses head n he panics instead

kiran after a long day of class: oh my GOD the lecturer also killed me

alfonse, his folkvangr already in hand: ARE YOU ALRIGHT? ARE U BLEEDING? WHERE DID HE HURT YOU?

classic lit authors on ao3
  • Jane Austen: The slowburn writer to end all slowburn writers. Has a mild case of purple prose syndrome. Sets you up to think she's using a really lame trope or cliche, but then pulls the old BITCH U THOUGHT. Gets in fights with commenters who completely miss the point of her work.
  • William Shakespeare: Where dick jokes meet feels. Recycles old plots that have been in the fandom for years, but always manages to put a new spin on it. That said, he's better known for good character writing than good plots. Kind of problematic, but people love him anyway. Laughs at and encourages commenters who completely miss the point of his work.
  • The Brontë Sisters: Their fics get lots of comments but they never reply. They never leave author notes, either. They share an account, and there are talks of a collab fic coming soon. Write fics for OTPs of questionable healthiness and consent. Only ever write darkfic. Like, REALLY dark. ...People are getting kind of worried about them.
  • Edgar Allan Poe: Also only ever writes darkfic, but at this point, people have moved past being worried about him and have just accepted that he's weird, he's morbid, and we love him. Channels his feelings about his ex into his writing. It results in really good stories but everyone's sort of like, "...Dude."
  • Charles Dickens: Trying to set the record for highest wordcount on ao3, and it shows.
  • Victor Hugo: Currently holds the record for highest wordcount on ao3.
  • Oscar Wilde: Only ever writes M/M. Has a BAD case of purple prose, but it's worth it if you manage to get through. His stories are either hilarious or soul-crushing. Or somehow both. People love him but know better than to disagree with him publicly, lest he destroy you with one of his infamous subtweets.
  • L. Frank Baum: Wrote one really well-loved story that's among the most famous in the fandom, and it's literally all he's known for, and it pisses him off. His popular story became a multichap against his will because it's the only one of his stories anyone actually reads. He keeps trying to end it so he can work on other things, but always ends up coming back.
  • Arthur Conan Doyle: Feels L. Frank Baum's pain. SO much.
  • James Joyce: Has fascinating ideas, but takes forEVER to get to the point in his stories. Also a stoner, and it shows.
  • Lousia May Alcott: Writes stories for her unpopular OTP (that's a NOTP for most of the fandom) and breaks up everyone's favorite ships, mainly out of spite. Also kills everyone's favorite characters, less so out of spite.
  • Mary Shelley: Writes incredible stories, but publishes under her boyfriend's account because she's banned from ao3. ...Again.

so I was talking with @gitwrecked about the Space Dad mentality and how rare it is that Shiro gets to have fun like the other Paladins do. A lot of fic and art either assume Shiro’s the responsible character, or leave him out completely while all the Paladins are having fun - and that’s always bugged me, a bit. Shiro so rarely gets a chance to play those games, or make mistakes, or be smol, or be taken care of in any way. In fandom, Shiro’s almost always the Responsible One, whether that’s in charge of the team, assisting with the team’s personal affairs/relationship woes Via the giving of Dad Advice, etc. etc. Even the mentality that back at the Garrison Shiro must’ve been tight-laced, Perfect, and Always Responsible is just…it doesn’t make sense, to me. Considering everything he’s been through, can’t our Shiro be allowed some fun?

Shiro would’ve been a COMPLETE troublemaker back at the Garrison. Hardworking and dedicated, sure, but once he proved himself and climbed up the ranks, so to speak? Kid could get away with ANYTHING. Nobody can keep a straight face quite like Shiro. Nobody knows why there’s always one particular flight-bike returned with just a bit less fuel than the others, nope, no sir. No, nobody knows how the doors to the hangars were left unlocked and a trio of cows slipped in last night. Nope, definitely not. Shirogane? Nope, definitely not involved. What kind of person would think that of Innocent, Responsible Shiro?

Shiro gets away with a lot of stuff like this. Matt only eggs him on, the little troublemaker. The two of them would make SUCH a pair, wreaking havoc, always messing things up, and the worst part is Iverson can NEVER PROVE IT. If Matt has even half the hacking skills of Pidge? Nothing would be safe. The rosters? Weird how Shiro and Matt are always in the same classes. Any type of list? Funny that the mess hall’s serving chocolate cake for dinner for the fourth night in a row, how odd. The simulators? 

Dear lord, the simulators.

Fake missions. Weird Easter Eggs left behind in mission logs, so the freshmen are running these simulations and that’s definitely a duck that just flew past us, sir, how is a duck faster than this ship? Weird loopholes, one set of canyons that definitely loops you back to the beginning just after you exit. Missions with heavy-loss scenarios that light up at the end with a huge message saying APRIL FOOL’S. Just messing with everyone.

[Iverson: WHO LET HOLT INTO THE SIMULATOR PROGRAMMING?
Matt, deadpan, as the newbies running the simulation have to fly through a series of caves in a mountain that looks suspiciously like a nose (only access point is through the nostril): It’s my computer programming final, sir. 
Iverson, who didn’t check all the course syllabi: Shirogane, is this true?
Shiro, without batting an eye: Yes sir.]

In addition to the ability to lie their way out of every inquisition, Matt and Shiro are pretty clever at this. They don’t have to lie often because they don’t get caught. They’re extremely cautious, planning tricks weeks or months in advance, well worth taking the time to pull it off well and cover our tracks than it is to get caught and give up the whole game. (I’m not saying they were Weasleys of the Garrison, but.) 

I wonder if this is also one of the reasons Lance looks up to Shiro so much. Picture one night a very young and impressionable Lance sneaking out of his dorm after hours, trying to get a level up by gaining just one extra peek at the simulators (poor bab wants so badly to be fighter class), and in so doing caught the rarest of rare events: Shiro, sneaking out of the simulator programming room.

And Lance doesn’t mean to, but he stumbles right into a trashcan and makes a huge clatter and Shiro’s head whips up and the two of them just stare at each other. Lance’s heart is going a mile a minute, he’s going to get in trouble, that’s Takashi Shirogane, the straight-A Perfect Responsible Top Of His Class Pilot - 

Shiro draws breath. Lance winces, waiting for the reprimand.

“Can you keep a secret?” Shiro asks, and winks.

“Uh,” stutters Lance, floored.

And then the next day Lance is watching the simulator runs with his class, but for whatever reason the Simulator’s infected with some sort of weird bug. Anytime anyone fails at any part of the program the screen rains down confetti on them. Forgot to buckle your seatbelt? CONFETTI. Effed up that landing? CONFETTI. Turning to hurl into the main gearbox- 

“Shirogane,” Iverson growls, “Did you program this run?”

“Must be a glitch, sir,” Shiro says, completely straight-faced.

And Lance is a goner.

27 Dress Code Violations

@jilychallenge 04/2017 | @bantasticbeasts vs @anxiouspotter

Muggle AUs | “i get dress coded so you give me your jacket and we protest unfair regulations for girls together/you sass the teacher about how distracted you are by my shoulders”

Word Count: 2500

special shoutout to @jiilys. solidarity, sister

AO3


i.

She walks into English fifteen minutes late, wearing both a deeply unflattering smock and a scowl. Neither are an especially new look on her.

“Vector,” she says under her breath, as an answer to Mary McDonald’s unspoken question. It’s the answer to every question in the room. Ms Vector is notorious among them all for her very strict adherence to the school’s dress code.

“Yes, Miss Evans’ entrance was very exciting, but I’ll have your attention back to the lesson now, please,” says Ms McGonagall. James snaps back to attention. It’s for the best.

ii.

“Here,” James says, shrugging off his jacket and thrusting it toward Lily. She gives him this look like, fuck off, and James has to bite his tongue to stop from aggravating her. “They’re doing uniform checks up the hall. Just put it on.”

Evans gives him a very strange look, and it takes him a second to realise that it’s neutral.

She looks good in his jacket.

iii. 

Every third dress code violation results in a lunch time detention. It’s only October, and Lily’s already had six. She doesn’t look at James as she takes the seat three ahead and one to the left of him.

iv.

There’s a thump from somewhere in the back of the classroom, and McGonagall isn’t planning on looking up - it sounds like it came from the general vicinity of Potter and Black, and that’s certainly not a situation she wants to engage with - but the entire class is already turned around to see what the fuss is.

She strides down the aisle between the desks, and is about three years past surprised to find James Potter lying on the floor, gazing at the ceiling, glasses knocked aside.

“Am I boring you so much that you decided to take a nap?” she asks, and James gives this wicked smile, and here we go–

“Sorry, Miss, I can’t get up. It’s Evans’ shoulders - they’re overwhelming me. I simply can’t do anything until she covers them up. Sirius, tell me when it’s safe.”

He’s a funny boy, she’ll give him that. “Potter, get up. This is hardly the time for foolishness.”

Keep reading

I’m honestly SO DONE with Tumblr people trying to prove that whatever slang is “problematic” and thus unusable because it has a troubled history

LISTEN

YOU WANT TO PLAY THAT MOTHERFUCKING GAME?

Alright, well the word “okay”–which is the SINGLE MOST UNDERSTOOD WORD AROUND THE GLOBE–originated as this weird trend in Victorian times for making acronyms of intentionally mispelled words because dyslexia and learning disorders are hilarious. O.K. stands for “oll korrect.” So you’re making fun of people who can’t spell worth a shit whenever you use it. Don’t use “okay” unless you hate people with dyslexia and learning disorders!!!!!!!!!

I don’t think you realize how many words have FUCKED UP origins, but here’s a clue, it’s a fucking lot. Don’t play this game or you will wreck yourself when someone who actually knows this enters the game.

` ° * ✧ ° RANDOM SENTENCE STARTERS PT 2.

❛ I wish that I could tell you. ❜
❛ You should have stayed. ❜
❛ Please don’t come looking for me. ❜
❛ Just get out of here. ❜
❛ I don’t know, I just don’t know. ❜
❛ Why did you come? ❜
❛ Do you think this is a game? ❜
❛ Can’t break something that was already broke. ❜
❛ Don’t fix something that isn’t broke. ❜
❛ Why can’t you just butt out?
❛ I don’t need your help. ❜
❛ I’m not here for you. ❜
❛ You’re never here for me when I need you. ❜
❛ Is that smell you? ❜
❛ Can you please just stop already. ❜
❛ I’m leaving you. ❜
❛ I just didn’t want you to come around. ❜
❛ Are you sure you’re okay alone? ❜
❛ No, no, no, no —- I just checked it last night. ❜
❛ Don’t worry, you’ll learn how to do it someday. ❜
❛ I think we are going to like each other a lot. ❜
❛ I just wanted to come and let you know. ❜
❛ So, what are you going to do, now that you know? ❜
❛ You have got to be fucking kidding me right now. ❜
❛ Do me a favor and shut up already. ❜
❛ Scratch the serial number off of it. ❜
❛ I’m not wearing a mask. ❜
❛ You act like it’s all my fault sometimes. ❜
❛ I’m here for your pity party. ❜
❛ You are in a lot of trouble, you know that right? ❜
❛ You aren’t allowed in here. ❜
❛ Who invited you? ❜
❛ You aren’t wanted around here anymore. Sorry. ❜
❛ I can’t keep covering for you. What’s going on? ❜
❛ Just tell me what’s wrong! Talk to me! ❜
❛ There’s so many things I would’ve done differently. ❜
❛ Stop crying about it and do something about it. ❜
❛ Stop looking for the things worth dying over and find the things worth living for. ❜
❛ So, prove them wrong. Thats the best way to do it. ❜
❛ Don’t need anyone who doesn’t need me. ❜
❛ Yeah, well, we all have our sob story so just save it. ❜
❛ Don’t cry over me or for me, I’m not worth it. ❜
❛ It isn’t cheating if you aren’t actually dating. ❜
❛ You know what? That’s a good idea. ❜
❛ You need to find someome better already. ❜
❛ I’m not listening to your bullshit right now. ❜
❛ Is that a freaking condom? ❜
❛ It smells like sour milk in here for crying out loud. ❜
❛ Am I really standing here witnessing this right now? ❜
❛ I’m not a bad influence if it’s always your ideas. ❜
❛ I never forced you to do anything. ❜
❛ Are you really walking out on me? ❜
❛ Come near me again and I’ll blow your head off. ❜
❛ Treat me like the princess that I am. ❜
❛ Just remember a lot of guys want what I’m letting you do right now. ❜
❛ How can you possibly be in love with two people at the same time? ❜
❛ Let’s just get out of here. ❜
❛ Shhh, I’m going to key his/her car. ❜
❛ There’s no one even here. ❜
❛ I’m just saying, it sounds like a bad idea. ❜
❛ Is that blood on your shirt? ❜
❛ Oh my God, are you bleeding?! ❜
❛ Jesus, don’t you ever get tired of doing that. ❜
❛ You know they throw people in Asylum’s for doing that. ❜
❛ You’re just looking for trouble, like always. ❜
❛ Enough is never enough for you. ❜
❛ I could never get tired of this. ❜
❛ You’re so jumpy lately. ❜
❛ I mean I feel bad but whatever. ❜
❛ I have a reputation to maintain unlike you. ❜
❛ Why are you staring at me? ❜
❛ Stop feeding into his/her bullshit! Wake up! ❜
❛ Are you on drugs or something? ❜
❛ You have lost your fucking mind, once and for all. ❜
❛ Yes, you summoned me. ❜
❛ I’m not here to help you. I’m here to watch you struggle. ❜
❛ Hey, cut it out already! I can hear the stupid TV. ❜
❛ Are you seriously asking me this right now? ❜
❛ Have you ever tried to count the stars? ❜
❛ I should kill you right now! ❜
❛ Don’t you dare walk away from me! ❜
❛ I know where you live! Don’t forget! ❜
❛ I just wanted to have a good time but no, you couldn’t let me, could you? ❜
❛ This friendship has officially sunk, hope you’re happy. ❜
❛ Are you satisfied now? You should be. This is what you wanted. ❜
❛ I don’t get everything that I want unlike you. ❜
❛ Must be nice to be that miserable all the time. ❜
❛ Happiness is the most temporary thing in life. ❜
❛ Everything happens for a reason, right? ❜
❛ You can call me at any hour. Always. ❜
❛ There’s nothing that I can’t do. ❜
❛ You’re like a forty year old, like an old soul or something. ❜
❛ Say it or I’ll cut your finger off. ❜
❛ I will stab you right in the eye if you look at me one more time. ❜
❛ Go ahead and look but don’t touch, unless you want a broken limb. ❜
❛ I’m actually a serial killer. I’m not joking. ❜
❛ You have such a morbid sense of humor. ❜
❛ This is our time, come on, let’s have our time. ❜
❛ Hey, want a hand with that? ❜
❛ I almost forgot what that felt like. ❜
❛ I just want to feel something. I don’t know what though. ❜
❛ I need your help with something. ❜
❛ I’m pissed off right now. ❜
❛ Don’t go breaking my heart. ❜
❛ Why do you build me and watch me fall? Is that fun for you? ❜
❛ Well, I’m used to it by now, so take your best shot. ❜
❛ I hate crying. It makes me mad. ❜
❛ I really don’t want to be seen with you right now. ❜
❛ Please, just don’t forget. Whatever you do. Don’t forget. ❜
❛ You can’t catch me though. ❜
❛ I know I said fucked up things and I’m sorry. ❜
❛ Look, I’m an asshole. I don’t mean be to be. ❜
❛ I’ll try not to be an asshole anymore. ❜
❛ Any pocket knives or anything? ❜
❛ Where’d you go? ❜
❛ I’m going to turn myself in. ❜
❛ Did you finish your cigarette yet? ❜
❛ You can turn around and face the other way. ❜
❛ It wasn’t worth it, was it? ❜
❛ I have no idea what you said. ❜
❛ Right now, you’re acting very weird. ❜
❛ I don’t even know what that statement means. ❜
She really likes dogs...

Meeting a phantom dog guarding a library:

DM: Its growls and snarls at you.

Bard: I throw it a ration.

DM: it snarfs it down and growls a little less.

Bard: I throw it another.

DM: it snarfs it down and burps.

Fighter: I hold a ration out in my hand to it.

DM: it snaps at your hand.

Fighter: Is it holding on?

DM: it’s trying to…

Fighter: I hold out my hand still.

DM: Well then thats… 2 points of damage

Fighter: I still hold it out.

DM: that’s another 8 points…

Fighter: Puppyyyyyy…….

DM: that’s 19 points. How long are you gonna lose your fingers?

Fighter: Worth it, I got to pet a dog.

(Later as we backtrack)

Fighter: Is my puppy still there??

DM: No, it’s on the other side of the two secret doors.

Fighter: Can I go through?

DM: (exasperated) I don’t care.

Fighter: I go through!

DM: Fine it eats your arm.

Victor Nikiforov as Howl~

I was watching Howl’s moving castle for the hundredth time again this weekend and I couldn’t stop thinking about Victor when I saw Howl >w< so this happened when I realized how much I wanted to draw Vitya with long hair as well ♥ ゜・。。・

…I hate myself. I feel like an idiot saying it because, blah, blah, teen angst, boo hoo, but I do. I hate myself. Almost all the time. I try not to tell anyone because I don’t want to burden them, but I feel like I’m falling farther and farther away from them. Like the well’s getting deeper and I’m running out of energy to climb it and any minute now, any second, it’s going to stop being worth even trying.
—  The Rest of Us Just Live Here

anon asked ask-defeated-bill: well, bill, while you’re stuck there, what do you do to pass the time?

Last week i found @knittinggiantbeanies old ask bill blog and i wanted to do a fan animation of one of the answers lmao XD It was really fun trying to animate him like this, and i might do some more animations like this if time lets me 0v0 and be sure to check out Judy’s other stuff on her blog! 8D she’s really talented bskfhjskdfhj i wish i could voice act like her

Improper Evangelizing

Long context: In a 5e game, we’re being pursued on a carriage by a group of Fell bats in the middle of an undead siege on the city. The party has whittled it down to the last bat.

Our Paladin is the son of Bahamut, and must spread his religion to prove his worth to his father. To do this, a book has been created, and our Paladin wears a robe that will magically conjure one of the books every time he reaches into it and says the phrase, “Have I got a book for you!”

DM: The last Bat is still pursuing you. [Paladin], you’re up.

Paladin: Well, I don’t want to hold action again since my breath weapon is out. I’m going to try to evangelize the bat to my religion!

DM: It doesn’t understand common.

Paladin: Shit. Well, I guess I can throw a book at it.

*A moment of stunned silence as we all take in what he just suggested*

DM: (attempting to suppress his giggling) Okay. Roll a strength improvised weapon throw.

Paladin: I got… a 21 total.

DM: (giggling maniacally) That hits! Roll damage.

Paladin: 11.

DM: (trying not to laugh hysterically) You hear the voice of your father in your head, whispering “Use the book…”

Paladin: (dramatically) I reach into my robes, and shout the phrase “Have I got a book for you!”, and on ‘you’, I frisbee the book as hard as I can!

DM: The book has a beautiful curve to it, arcing gracefully through the rain, water cascading from its’ spinning surface. You watch as it moves and intercepts the bat, perfectly hitting it in the face, crushing its’ skull and killing it instantly.

Party: *bursts out into hysterical laughter*

Fighter: (me, imitating the DM’s Bahamut voice) [Paladin], you idiot! That’s not how you evangelize!

Paladin: (laughing and fighting back tears) I just wanted you to be proud of me!

Needless to say, our Paladin used his book to successfully convert many that night.

scarletnightwalker  asked:

Hello, I was wondering if you could help me. Lately I've come across the healthy/unhealthy personality types. Though I know, that I'm an ENTP, I would like to learn, how you can tell whether they are healthy or not. Would be great if you would explain this. Thanks in advance PS.: I'm not sure, if this is the right place to ask my questions, so correct me if the 'question' section isn't the right one.

It’s the right place. All the mods are pretty chill coz we’re awesome. :)

Unhealthy NTP: never finishes anything or focuses on the details (zero follow through), uses their Fe to manipulate people (you’re soft, and a pansy, and making you fall for my BS is so fun, maybe I can even get you to cry by pointing out how stupid your ideas are!) or intentionally hurt them rather than forge genuine connections or take into consideration people’s feelings.

Healthy NTP: knows which ideas are better than others, in order to focus on bringing them into fruition and either commits to them long-term by selecting a creative partner (Ne/Fe) or giving their ideas away to others who can nail down the details. Is logical but gentle in correcting others, mindful that people’s feelings matter and it’s important for others to genuinely like you in life, in order to get things done (and because it’s the nice thing to do). Realizes they’re prone to hyperbole, short term interests, and exaggeration, and learns to laugh about it, but also acknowledge it and work on fixing it. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy NFP: never finishes anything or focuses on details (zero follow through), follows their heart without regard for the consequences, using that to justify hurtful behavior (I don’t care what you think, I fell out of love with you, so I can cheat on you all I want, I’ve done nothing wrong, this is who I am, just deal with it or get out), refuses to take blame for their part of the problem, may intentionally offend others, and doesn’t care about anyone but themselves.

Healthy NFP: knows which ideas are better than others and seeks to bring the best ones into the world through healthy engagement of goals, deadlines, and process of elimination (Te). Sets personal deadlines for self, and beats them, in order to stay motivated. Understands what drives them most, slows them down, or angers them, and commits to doing something about it. Learns such things as “tact,” when dealing with others, but also when and where to defy social norms and stand up for oneself (does that really matter? is it worth a fight?). Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy NTJ: becomes obnoxious in pushing their “vision” on others or asserting they know everything (including your motives) while devaluing your feelings or beliefs, often sneers at people who make emotional decisions, and sometimes passive-aggressively attacks people’s ego or intelligence that they do not like (okay, stupid, I’m just going to make you look like an idiot, while correcting every damn thing you say, all day long, until you run away and cry).

Healthy NTJ: has a fair, balanced, and open-minded approach to life, is willing to listen to others’ ideas and offer practical thoughts on them, but is neither arrogant nor pushy about their knowledge, expertise, and logical detachment. Chooses when to correct others with care, and never does so to humiliate, only to educate. Respects others’ feelings even if they personally feel that the other person is making a mistake. Focuses on taking their ideas and goals and making them real. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy NFJ: total detachment from reality, while stubbornly clinging to the belief that their irrational interpretation is “the truth” (and the ONLY truth) (It DOES make sense, you’re just too stupid to understand it!), and resorting to a “you’re either with us or against us” mentality, which manifests in creating a single universal (sometimes abstract) enemy and trying to recruit others to join their cause against them / you (bad Ni and Fe).

Healthy NFJ: has a fair, balanced, and open-minded approach to life, accepts their interpretation may be unrealistic, but is committed to bringing their ideas and visualizations to life, often by recruiting others to a positive common cause. Uses their understanding of others’ motives to uplift rather than tear down, and becomes a source of compassionate and guiding “wisdom” for friends (I worry about you choosing this path, and here’s why…). Never recruits others in any negative ways against someone who disagrees with them. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy STP: irresponsible, reckless, and hedonistic, engaging in short-term behaviors that leave a wake of destruction behind (broken marriages, families, and violated responsibilities), often using Fe to manipulate people to get what they want (hey, I’m super hot and I’ve seen you ogling my backside, so I’m going to wear something that accentuates it so you’ll give me what I want in return one of these days; I don’t care how wrong it is) and then dumping them like hotcakes.

Healthy STP: knows life has much to offer and not only enjoys it but helps others loosen up and try new things, but commits to the people, beliefs, and jobs that are most important to them, for the long term. Understands and respects others’ feelings and seeks to connect to them through that, as well as develop their own ability to communicate. Learns the art of tact and when to use it (is it worth correcting this person or does it matter?). Tries to think about the long-term consequences of impulse, before engaging in it. Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy SFP: irresponsible, reckless, and hedonistic, going through jobs and romantic relationships like wildfire, abandoning people every time they get “bored” or feel unattached; justifies this behavior with selfish reasoning (I just don’t love you anymore, so I don’t have to treat you with respect); unable to be counted upon by other people, since they never show up or follow through; refuses to take responsibility through their actions and doesn’t mind offending others for no reason at all.

Healthy SFP: is good at self-entertaining and eager to try new things, and infects others with a similar excitement; is good at pushing people out of their comfort zones and encouraging them to aim high for their dreams. Has a strong sense of personal beliefs, and is willing to commit to other people, and prioritize them in relationships. Knows when it’s appropriate to defy social convention, and when it’s better to dial back the “but this is just who I am!” and chill. Sets personal goals, deadlines, and achievements, and sticks with things, so they have something tangible to show for their time (Te). Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy STJ: refuses to adapt or change even when their world implodes; may try and “force” or “strong-arm” others into their point of view. Has little interest or respect for people’s feelings and doesn’t mind crushing them on their way to success, but may also play the role of a martyr in the process (since NO ONE ELSE IS RESPONSIBLE AROUND HERE, I HAVE TO DO IT). May become irrational or paranoid with lower Ne, and turn into a pessimist.

Healthy STJ: uses their extensive past experience to figure out what will and won’t work when dealing with life and problems, but is also open to new ideas, trying out new things, and experiencing what “lies beneath the surface” (Ne). Tries not to shut down ideas until they have considered them. Is practical, efficient, and logical, but also respects people’s feelings and doesn’t intentionally try to hurt, shame, or control them. Becomes able to share what they need emotionally with others, rather than playing a martyr (I would like it if you would take the trash out; since I’m doing this other thing, it seems fair, and it would make me happy). Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes.

Unhealthy SFJ: refuses to change or adapt, while clinging stubbornly to their idea of “how things were,” while struggling to control their emotions; may resort to being “fake” in order to manipulate others, to “us vs them” thinking and overt moralizing (if you don’t agree with us, you’d better change your mind or face the consequences, because we can’t let you hold such a wrong point of view and will punish you for it).

Healthy SFJ: uses the past to form impressions about people and situations, but changes those perceptions based on new experience; is open to new ideas and beliefs, and willing to look beneath the surface (Ne), with the aim of making those things “useful and tangible” in the real world (how can this idea apply to life and improve our situation?). Learns the art of “polite affirming correction,” which helps others become better, while not shaming, humiliating, or insulting them for their behavior. Aware not everyone needs to agree, and comfortable with those who don’t; never recruits anyone against anyone else, or adopts a mentality of “let’s get that person, together.” Takes personal responsibility for their mistakes. 

- ENFP Mod

Thoughts while reading Acowar.

Mind the swearing and spoilers kids.

-2 years before the wall? Wait is this like a baby bat Rhys POV?
-oh God this field isn’t a nice place. Kinda like it tho.
- omfg 6 High Fae… 6, to defeat one Illyrian… damn.
- Rhys is so protective if his brothers it’s killing me.
-AGH PART ONE HERE I FUCKING COME.
-Yes Feyre, burn this shit.
-Already thinking about that wingspan Feyre? Can’t blame ya.
- Ugh Tamlin no can you not enter this moment just yet. Ugh Lucian I’m fucking watching you.
-Oh for Fuck sake I gotta read about Ianthe soon to?
-ugh I just want some smut and it’s only page nine.
-Feyre you can roll your eyes. God knows I am.
- Oh hey Ianthe, go Fuck yourself Ianthe.
-You definitely revived something from Rhys hands Feyre, but it was far more pleasurable than torture.
-Lucian I won’t ship you and Elaine. But please, for the love of God, kill Ianthe.
-Oh hell fucking ni, Jurian, go fucking Fuck yourself and stay the Fuck away.
-Oh snap, Nesta and Elaine already so powerful they can drain the cauldron.
-Oh snap, Feyre laying down these facts. Also that’s how I spell Miryaim’s name.
-Feyre you savage.
-Jurian, talk about Elaine like that again and I will kill you.
-Oh Fuck off Ianthe, I’ve read enough of you.
-Okay Lucian, my heart is softening towards you.
-God I missed you Alis.
-Damn summer solstice is giving me goosebumps.
-Rhys you are giving me life.
-Uh Oh, Tamlin’s getting jealous of friendship.
-YOU FUCKING BURNED THEIR WINGS.
-Ahhh Feyre you also cringing about Elaine being fucked by a fire blooded male?? Let me introduce to Azriel. He’s far better in my opinion.
-All these painting titles… we’re they like, working title for Acowar.
-Rhysand you get that tongue to work.
-Also Tam you prick.
-TAMLIN YOU MOTHERFUCKING PRICK HOW WOULD YOU LIKE A WHIPPING.
-God Alis, my bae.
-Feyre slit her throat.
-Yes Feyre Fuck this bitch up.
-Oh these twins. Can you fucking not.
- Go Lucian Go.
-Bring on Part Two.
-“He can get in line,” Feyre getting a list of people who wanna kill her to rivals Aelins.
-Oh for Fuck sake, everything was going so well, until Lucian’s brothers showed up.
-OMG CASSIAN YOU’RE BACK.
-AZRIEL MY CUPCAKE.
-“There’s no such thing as a High Lady,” bitch excuse me.
-Cassian you melt my stone cold heart.
-Mor my darling.
-OMG IT’S HAPPENING, RHYS IS COMING.
-Amren, boo. Hru?
-Lucian being called a girl, I’m dying
-AGH RHYS.
-“Go find somewhere else to be,” I know what that means.
-The smut was worth it.
-Oh I missed the banter of my baby bats.
-And Rhys’ swearing begins.
-Cassian sunning his wings. I wonder if a certain Nesta sees.
-Cassian trying to be chill around Nesta is my new aesthetic.
-Nesta reads romance. Hell Yes.
-“You come between a male and his mate, Nesta Archeron, and you’re going to learn about the consequences the hard way.” Trying to foreshadow something there Cassian? I Ship.
-No is mentioning the sorrow and longing in Cassian eyes, Feyre, for the same reason no one mentioned it when Rhys looked at you all those months ago.
-Reading about Elaine is painful.
-I’m relating to Elaine and all those open curtains too much… shit.
-Cassian you’re to precious.
-I missed the Amren/Cassian banter so much.
-Shit Mor is getting pissed.
-Feyre keeps calling Rhys mate and I’m feeling bad for the Australian readers.
-“Because I can’t stay away” well Fuck me if they ain’t mates.
-Nesta looking as Cassian like he’s the only one in the room.
-Damn right there was a reason Lucian wore a fox mask.
-Idk what to write but the nessian at pg.203. gahhhhhhh.
-“Surely Nesta wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle,” omfg Feyre, it’s hilarious of you to think that.
-Feyre were you not there for Acomaf. He was very clearly, cocky then.
-Library sex? I’m in.
-oh, so no library sex.
-To the Bone Carver we go. RIP.
-Oh so, the Carver, and the Wearer are- I’d be shocked only I read that spoiler.
-Oh so the Carver is a mirror type of perosn? What even is a mirror person? Is it his kink?
-Oh Nesta having death powers.
-Feyre constantly calling Rhys mate tho.
-Tbh all I wanna know is who or what the carver appeared to Cassian.
-Everyone in this book be complementing Rhys good taste.
-Ah Az and Elaine be starting. Az be carrying his ship.
-Poor Cassian. Nesta will come around, I promise, I read the spoiler.
-YES AZRIEL SHOW HER THE GARDEN. I’VE READ THIS SPOILER PAGE SO MUCH AND NOW IT’S MINE.
-You know, I wrote a fanfiction about Az and Elaine in a garden and her calling his scars pretty. They kissed in it.
-“Azriel isn’t the ravishing type,” Rhys you should read the fanfic I wrote about him. He loves to ravish.
-omg Cassian calming Nesta- ugh how many more pages until this kiss?
-Az, sunning your wings for Elaine? How scandalous.
-“Why not make them mates?” Feyre babe I’m asking the same question.
-FEYRE YOU SHIP ELRIEL TOO? Oh sweetie I love you more than Cassian rn.
-Rhysand, let Feyre play matchmaker.
-I was about to bash Kier for insulting Az, but Az got this shit.
-Oh not this fucking Eris bitch again.
-Rhys the Fuck you playing at?
-Okay, ngl I know Mor is gay but those Eris know? Ffs.
-Okay everyone is fighting and I’m more intrigued than I should be.
-D'as Nessian.
-Double d'aw Elriel.
-Pg.303 and back to sassy Az.
-Sassy Az KS giving me life.
-It was at page 306 that I realised I was in love with Az.
-Nephelle’s be giving me goosebumps.
-Yes bathtub scent with Rhys.
-Oh it’s actually a massage scene? I’m in.
-Feyre are you trying to start a war? Cassian flying with Nesta. Dammit who am I kidding I wanna see that.
-Yes Az, help Elaine in the garden. I am sailing this ship.
-Nesta watching Cassian lick his fingers and I’m like, now imagine that kissing elsewhere.
-Nes? I ship.
-Some shit happening in the library.
-ohhhh so we finally reached the part where people wonder if Elaine is a seer.
-Yes Feyre, put Elaine’s riddles together.
-Okay that scene was intense but Nessian at the end was calming.
-“Amren on the hunt,” a novel by sjm.
-Damn Az, took you awhile but bravo, she’s a seer. God it couldn’t be any easier to love you.
-Lucian I swear to God if you die, looking for this sixth queen, I will kill you.
-Also where is my Suriel.
-Shit Alis don’t die.
-oh FFS, look, “king” of Hybren, old buddy. If you’d kindly fuck off. Only it’s late, I don’t need these plot twists.
-Look, “King,” I’d pay good money to see you try and take Feyre.
-Rhys if you could destroy my upcoming exams the way you did those ships, I’d be grateful.
-pg.379, more smut, hell yes.
-pg.381, Nesta all concerned.
-The amount of sex feysand are having. That wingspan must be truly impress you Feyre darling.
-So Cassian is terrible at complements.
-Ah yes boys, bringing up that wingspan again.
-This Nessian tho.
-“she threatened to freeze my balls off,” Kallias, Viviane, welcome to my heart.
-I’m in love with Viviane.
-God sake, Tamlin Fuck off.
-Tamlin, let me tell you, Rhys and Feyre have fucked so much I’m sure he could recount every noise she is capable of making.
-Fucking shut up Tamlin.
-Eris if you’d kindly shut the Fuck up too, it’d be a pleasure.
-Pg.438, Nesta, damn, *blows kisses.*
-nvm of 439, Go Feyre. Slay.
-Helion…. wait… look I can’t go around loving all these people. It makes me look like I have a heart.
-You know I’d be surprised at Lucian being a whole, some air of dawn court, but I already read that spoiler.
-Okay mor is gay why is- you know what, never mind, I give up.
-Oh. Oh Fuck.
-lol, I’m so tired, whenever I hear the wall mentioned all I can think of is humpty dumpty.
-“Don’t even start,” Nesta, sweetie, we’ve been shipping this since the last book.
-Part three here I come.
-btw this is still the same day for me. I’ve read up to part three in a few hours. It’s two in the morning. Never underestimate a fangirl deprived of her smut.
-Jurian just has to show up, doesn’t he.
-idk who I am to believe anymore.
-I wanna say Fuck this shit I’m out. But I am so in.
-So am I meant to trust Jurian or not.
-Damn Tarquin.
-Nessian will kill me quicker than these plot twists.
-Ayyy more shut, god I love you Sarah.
-Yes, the Suriel is coming into play bitches. I’d been surprised by what happens only I’ve seen this spoiler too.
-Okay first thing first, Ianthe please Fuck off Secondly rip Suriel 2K17.
-Cassian what happened. Nesta please. I know the ending and shit but tf happened.
-Feyre be joining up these dots about which way Mor floats.
-This, Varian, Amren thing, yeah I’d like another five books of it.
-Awww, Az, you’re to sweet and selfless.
-I’m so tired IDK how to feel anymore.
-Oh greatttt, Feyre got hit with an arrow. Any more plot twists.
-Wait Tamlin? Fuck, ugh.
-d'aw, Elaine kissed his cheek.
-it’s four in the morning. I have less than one hundred pages left.
-Shit.
-Fucking hell Elaine stab them bastard.
-Also Nessian hell yes.
-Also…wait what’s happening.
-Rhysand you fucking bastard it’s five in the morning don’t do this to me. I know you live god dammit don’t fucking do this.
-oh thank fuck that’s all settled.
-This book. These plot twists. These ships. It’s all so heart wrenching and shit.
-Wait is she flying over Velaris in her lingerie.
-Fuck it’s half five in the morning. I read this book in under 24 hours. I need to sleep.
*hours later*
-omfg I need to read this shit again. It was so good. The High Lords, the banter, the near death experiences. The romance. The sass. Sarah you queen.
-if the at least the novellas don’t have nessian or Elriel tho I may be tempted to cry.

And that, my friends, is a snippet of the roller coaster if thoughts and emotions I went through. I was too tired to cry during it but my heart was successfully ripped out a few times.

Hey, all!  Amy here and feel free to skip this, but I noticed a huge thing going around with fanfiction writers and fanfiction readers. Kinda throwing arrows at one another over mistakes and how they should be addressed.

Okay, first off: stop.  Ew.  It’s gross. Y’all are big boys and girls and y’all can act like it.  You don’t need to attack each other at the knees behind the safety of your screens.

Secondly:  there are points on both sides.  People who write have a right to be proud of their work and can choose not to accept criticism.  On the other hand, people who read and absorb the work have the right as well to point out mistakes they noticed if it’s meant to be helpful.

So how can people interact civilly when it comes to fanfiction and it’s accompanying critiques? By following a few internet rules, plain and simple.  No, I’m not gonna tell you to forgive and forget or just roll over and let the other person have their way.  That’s not what you do IRL and that’s not what you do online either.  Instead, both persons have a series of rules to follow in order to try and make the most of their experience.

Originally posted by m-blunicorn

FOR THE WRITERS:

I start with you because you’re the ones who have poured your heart and soul into this baby. And I get it, I do.  When you spend hours and hours slaving over your baby, going over the idea thousands of times in your head, trying to get the idea on paper, and trying to make it look good, then oh heck to the yes it’s your baby and you’re gonna defend it to the death.  I expect that and that’s okay.  What’s not okay is when it interferes with your ability to check in with the situation and see if they actually meant harm, so here are a few rules I’ve started to use over my years of fanfiction writing:

  1. Read the entire comment for content.  This is a bitter pill to take, especially if they sound condescending or snarky.  I’ve run into a few of them, and they’re never pleasant to deal with, but some of them have good ideas.  Try to filter out the junk of the comment and get to the meat of it all.  (I’ll get to what to do if there’s no meat later)
  2. Take a break from the comment when you get angry. And chances are that if it’s an unsolicited comment, you’re going to get angry.  This is your baby and you’ve worked hard on it.  If the crtiquer isn’t at least taking that into account, you may even get furious.  Get up and walk away.  They do not deserve your wrath.
  3. Decide for yourself if they have a point. Most critiquers tend to leave their comments because they’re trying to help in their own (somewhat obnoxious) way. If they’ve got a point, thank them, but also try to express if the critique was delivered well.  If it was, tell them so they can help more people. If not, tell them so they can work on it.  IF THEY DO NOT HAVE ANY POINT AT ALL AND ARE JUST BEING RUDE, get rid of it.  They’re not worth your time.
  4. Respond or toss.  This is up to you.  If they had content that was actually useful, then they were being helpful like they were trying to be.  If they had content and it wasn’t useful, it’s up to you what to do.  If they had zero content in their critique or it wasn’t relevant at all, skip it.  They’re not worth your time.

I actually formed these rules after an encounter with a critiquer who was completely neutral in tone, blurted my mistakes for the world to see, and essentially made me feel like the absolute worst writer in the world.  They weren’t harsh, but their critique did hurt me, especially because I’d still just been starting out.

The first thing that happened was I got angry.  I was livid, furious.  Like, how dare they?  Couldn’t they just sit back and enjoy the story?  I spent a good week or so avoiding my fanfiction account just because I was so pissed off.  I ended up talking to my mom and she asked me if they had any points.  I think she was going for “if they don’t, then they’re not worth your time”, but they did. After that, I went back and tried to see it from their point of view.

Originally posted by geekylaugifs

Didn’t mean I suddenly wasn’t mad at them.  I was mad, but I also realized that they, in their own roundabout and hurtful (to me, who reads inflection into typed words and winces at every loud noise and criticism) way, were trying to help me.

I worked on it, and I don’t think they ever commented on my stuff again, but the people who already loved my stuff?  The people who said that my stuff was ‘cute’ or ‘genius’?  They loved it all the more!  The critiquer may not have stuck around, but those who did benefited.

(It really took me a long time to stop being angry at them.  Now I just kind of take a lesson from them.  As a fanfiction writer, and as a critiquer myself.)

Originally posted by trendinggifs

FOR THE CRITIQUER:

I’m saying this as someone who has pretty high standards for what I read.  I look into formatting, tenses, plot, characterization, spelling, and even comma usage!  These little things do actually bug me, and sometimes enough to the point of wanting to comment, but I’ve been on the other side of it and remember the frustration and the anger that can come from a wrongly worded comment, so there are a few rules that I’ve formulated in order to be the best critiquer I can be and help as many people as possible get as amazing as they can as a writer!

Note:  These rules are for critiquers who actually do want to help writers get better and improve the overall quality of internet written works. If you’re here because of some superiority complex, these rules may be difficult for you to follow.  I, however, encourage you to do your best and perhaps one day you’ll be a good critiquer.  *^_^*

  1. Find a way to figure out if the author even wants your critique.  One way to do this is to respectfully ask them.  Always open with a positive.  Something like “Hey, I liked ___ about your story, but I noticed something was a bit off. Can I give you a constructive critique?” Typically, an author would be happy to know you cared about their opinion, so this will go either one of two ways.  They will either (A) allow the critique and actually listen to what you have to say or (B) politely decline the offer.  This means they have made up their mind and you are to let it go.  The back button is a wonderful friend at this point.
  2. Follow the sandwich format.  This is a tried and true method for getting people to actually listen.  If you start in with the critique, the author will feel attacked and immediately get defensive.  Instead of wondering if you’ve got any point, they will find ways to contradict you and argue.  Instead, open with something you liked about the story.  There was a reason you read it all to the end, wasn’t there?  Mention that first (AND BE HONEST!  NO ONE LIKES SOMEONE WHO GIVES OUT FALSE COMPLIMENTS), and then get to the critique, or ‘meat’, of your critique.  When that’s done, exit with a thank-you for being willing to listen to your comments.  It takes a lot for a creator to listen to someone point out the flaws in their baby, even if they’re trying to learn.  Remember that you want this to be a positive interaction, not a demolition derby.
  3. No insults or other derogatory comments. Unless explicitly stated otherwise, the writer is trying their best.  Insulting them makes them less willing to hear you out, much less accept your comments and get better.
  4. No elevating yourself over them.  It’s a no-brainer.  You’re not there to school them, you’re there to help them.  Helping requires a serving mind, which puts their needs before your ego.
  5. Do not hound the author.  If they listen but don’t take your comments, you’re not allowed to harass them.  Most likely, they don’t see a point in your comment and have elected to ignore it. And that’s fine.  The point is that you managed to bring it to their attention once.  Maybe they’ll come back to it later, maybe not.  Either way, once your critique is given, it’s done.  Unless they come to you asking about it, your job is to pack up and vamoose, or simply to sit back and enjoy watching the rest of the story unfold.
  6. Make sure your comments are objective.  Like, if there’s a comma problem, tell them about it. If there’s verb tenses being messed up, inform them politely.  If person A didn’t get with person B, then you’re not critiquing.  That’s a matter of opinion and doesn’t belong in the critiquing category.
  7. Be respectful.  They’re going on a limb and listening to you, and it’s the author’s choice whether or not to continue the correspondence. You don’t have to ‘kiss up to them’ or ‘serve them’, but you have to make sure you’re not being a jerk and that all your comments are warranted.

Originally posted by yourreactiongifs

I know there are a lot of rules, but critiquing is hard, especially with how a lot of people view them.  But you, the critiquer, ARE NOT EVIL.  You’re not the bad guy.  You’re not messed up.  You’re not ‘sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong’.  You’re human and you’re trying to be helpful.  These are just tips and tricks on how to go about it the right way and maximize your helpfulness.

Originally posted by hippie-janessa

FOR EVERYONE!!

The last thing I’ll say is that not everyone will follow these rules.  They will think they’re stupid or pandering or all-around dumb. Some people who claim to critique will continue to slander our good name by acting like holier-than-thou snits. Some people who write will continue to get outrageously angry for persons daring to say something went wrong.

Originally posted by blisteredblue

Here’s how to deal with them:

  1. Leave the computer.  Or the website, just for a bit.  Enjoy the sunshine, take a walk, talk with your best friend, eat some ice cream, go play.  See if it just blows over.  They don’t get to take away your happiness because they’re angry.
  2. Delete the hate.  When you’re good and happy, you can delete the hate mail, or maybe grab a friend to laugh at it.  But don’t respond to hate with anger.  As my good friend Warlord Okeer said, you shall inflict “the greatest insult an enemy can suffer. To be ignored.”
  3. If they chase you down in anger, block them. This is okay to do.  For fanfiction writers:  if they continue to pester you with their comments after you say ‘no thanks’, block their tails.  For fanfiction critiquers:  if they got angry over a critique you gave, provided that they said okay and provided that you followed the rules of critiquing, you’re allowed to block them. You did it right.  Don’t even stress.

And then there are the times where we forget to follow the rules and insult someone on accident. It happens.  If you realize you’re in the wrong, it’s just one rule.

  1. Apologize.  No, you don’t have to grovel for forgiveness, but understand that your actions may have hurt someone else and react accordingly.  If they won’t take it, at least make the promise to yourself to be better in the future.

And that’s it.  I know it seems like a lot to swallow, but it all boils down to making sure your words are respectful, kind, and true.

Originally posted by fandomdeluxe

Tl;dr:  MAKE SURE YOUR WORDS ARE RESPECTFUL, KIND, AND TRUE!!