10 WAYS TO HELP AUTISTIC PEOPLE [BY AN AUTISTIC PERSON]:
Be aware of your surroundings. Bright lights and too much
noise are hell for autistic people. Is there anywhere quiet or dim that you
could take them to if they got stressed? Is there a way to lessen the noise
Don’t tell us to “stop acting weird”. Chewing on things,
flapping our hands, rocking on our feet, and so on are all natural, healthy
behaviours that help us to process emotion and sensory input. Telling us not to
do them is akin to telling an allistic (non-autistic) person to stop smiling.
Most autistic people are happy as we are. Some would rather
not be autistic, it’s true, but most of us just want to be ourselves without
shame or stigma. It’s generally bad manners to talk to us about a “cure” or “treatments”
for who we are.
Non-verbal communication – vocal sounds, text or written
communication, sign language, etc – are all valid forms of communication which
we sometimes have to use. (Or always have to use, in some cases.) Sometimes, we
have to text the person sitting next to us because we can’t talk. Please don’t
try to make us use our voices when we’d rather not!
Research autistic groups before supporting them. What do
actual autistic people say about this group? We like self-advocacy groups, we
don’t like allistic people trying to talk for us. Not every group that claims
to help autistic people is actually our friend!
Special interests – things which autistic people fixate
on and obsess over – are healthy and important. Don’t make fun of us for getting
really into things, even if they’re “childish” things like Minecraft or Pokémon.
It’s incredibly hurtful when someone we like just dismisses our interests
without a second thought.
When an autistic person is having a meltdown or shutdown,
listen to them! Don’t fuss over them or get up in their face. Just listen to
what they want you to do to help them, if anything. Let them write or text it,
if they have to, and keep your voice down!
We don’t process the world the same way you do. Sometimes
things which seem obvious to you require explanation before we’ll understand
them. Sometimes an explanation you understand will be one that makes no sense
to us. Please be patient. We’re not being difficult on purpose! We want to
understand, we really do.
Be understanding when we say we can’t do something. Our
energy gets used up a lot quicker than yours. Often we’d really like to do
something, but we just can’t, and it can be difficult for us to explain that.
Don’t guilt trip us for not going out or whatever – we already feel really bad
Listen to our boundaries. If we don’t want to be
touched, don’t touch us. If we want you to leave our possessions alone, leave
them alone. If we aren’t up to talking, don’t try to make us talk. We need
boundaries a lot more than you do, so please try to respect them. It’s common
[I originally posted this on Facebook, but I decided to post it here, too.]
Youngjae: brings coco with, inflates a kiddie pool so
she can play, spends most of the time running to the ocean for sea water. Drops half his ice cream cone in the sand and begs Jaebum to buy
him a new one
Jinyoung: wore a giant hat & long sleeved shirt. Kicked off
his sandals and says he’s feeling crazy. SPF 80, even though he spends 5
minutes lecturing GOT7 on how anything above SPF 45 is a rip off. Reads a book
with his headphones in and ignores the world
Jaebum: spends the first hour trying to play sports, gives
up when he realizes Mark and Jackson are taking things seriously. Spends the
rest of the day sitting next to Jinyoung with a towel draped over his head, yelling every now and then at Bambam to put the glass down
Mark: plays every beach game Jackson brought. Has a large
band of followers but is too IN IT TO WIN IT to care. Turns out he can surf,
even though he’s never done it before? Punches a shark on the nose but tells no one
Yugyeom: the only one able to open up the beach umbrella.
Keeps being flirted with by girl lifeguards but has no idea what’s happening. Saves
Bambam from drowning in the ocean, forgets to reapply sunscreen and burns like
Bambam: wears sunglasses that are a cool color but offer
zero protection against the actual sun. brings speakers, starts a dance circle in the
sand with strangers. Has a pile of seashells on his towel, one of them
turns out to be a crab
Jackson: brought a volleyball, boogie board, kite, two
beach balls and one extra-large towel with tropical fish on it. Runs across the
sand yelling about how hot it is. Runs into the waves yelling how cold they
are. Runs into Jaebum and tackles him to the ground
Victor: You’re grounded and no TV.
Yuri: The TV’s broken.
Victor: Fine, then no computer!
Yuri: I need the computer for school.
Victor: *looking around before his eyes land on Otabek* Then no, uh, no Otabek!
Otabek: No Otabek!?!
Victor: No Otabek.
- Sometime in the distant, peaceful future… Various members of the cadre are having breakfast in Perranth - Lorcan sneaks up on Elide and squeezes her ass in the kitchen, and Elide swats his hand away playfully with a bread loaf - Food falls out of Fenrys’s mouth as he gapes in disbelief - Rowan is restraining the urge to laugh and reminds himself to tell Aelin later - Gavriel exchanges an amused look with Rowan - Lorcan walks into the dining room, where the rest of the cadre are trying to look preoccupied with something - Gavriel is staring intensely at the window drapes for gods sakes - Fenrys is burning a hole with his eyes into the muffin he’s holding - Rowan is pretending to drink some orange juice - “Got something to say?” Lorcan asks, that lethal quiet edging his tone - “No-pe.” Fenrys replies, popping the “p” - Rowan gives Lorcan a slightly smug look. “You always did love hands-on learning best.” - Gavriel can’t help but crack a smile - Lorcan snarls, “Let’s take this outside, Whitethorn.” - Rowan grins. “I did need to get some morning exercise in.” - Lorcan doing Lorcan things, probably snarling and snapping his teeth some more. having a mate is hard! - Elide’s obviously eavesdropping, and she rolls her eyes as the Fae males wrestle in the dirt outside