@pipistrellus i need you and everyone else to know that i found these in a bag of books from the son of a very, very well-known pair of televangelists, probably the first televangelists everyone thinks of when they hear the word televangelist. i can make a good guess as to why he had a ziploc bag of creepy plastic babies but i dunno why he brought them to the store. he said i could have them though

I had a dream that I had like, a pound of weed in my room and my friend found it and smoked some and then my mom kept being like ‘it smells kinda weird in here’ and every time I’d be like,

“HAHAHA YAH I JUST HAD SOME SAGE INCENSE LIT OFC” and I was afraid she was gonna bring a drug dog into my room for some reason.

Tarte Amazonian Clay Waterproof Brow Mousse

“This is no holy grail product. I usually like Tarte. This is a fail.”

I think the thing that drives me the craziest with bad reviews is not the terrible spelling, or general dipshittery, or the inability to use the proper version of “palette”; it’s the fact that people can never fuckin’ explain why they don’t like something. “It was bad” and variations thereof pop up a lot and it’s like, “WHY? WHY IS IT BAD? DID IT HURT YOU? SHOW ME WHERE THE KNIFE WENT IN.” These are makeup products and, if they’re bad, they’re bad for a goddamn reason. Maybe they’re patchy or they smell weird or you opened it up to see the words “EAT SHIT” carved into your Naked Palette, or SOMETHING, GOD JUST FUCKING TELL ME.

Also, note this: not everything needs to be perfect. Not everything needs to be “ultra-pigmented.” Not everything needs to be “transfer-proof.’’ Look, I love wild, richly coloured indelible eyeshadows and lipsticks as much as the next person, but sometimes I just want a bullet lipstick or a sheerer eye shadow (as someone who wears eye shadow almost every day, but only a sheer wash of one colour *~* VIOLENT GASPING*~*). Not everything is going to be a holy grail product either, and that’s ok. I have lots of things that I like that aren’t my be-all-end-all. I understand that people don’t want to waste money on expensive makeup, only to have them turn out to be piles of shit (and I also know that for certain products, especially base ones, you want to find one that works versus 14 that sort of work), but writing something off for not being “holy grail” is like ranking a restaurant one star because you had a better meal somewhere else once. You can still enjoy a burger, even when it’s not served on a freshly made bun and covered in gold leaf.

The fuck? I was eating a muffin my parents made and I felt something weird in my mouth and I was eating this green shit? The photo is bad ik

It looks like it came from a plant, it smells weird.. well it smells like chocolate but I remember smelling a plant my dad has and there’s a good possibility that this is the same plant.

And I don’t think it’s a good plant

Not gonna eat any more of this lol

Update: I don’t think the pieces of plant came from inside the muffin, I found two more pieces in the bottom of the wrapper

Transparent Emo Trinity label for my pal smells-like-weird-teens-spirit. [I used this on the cover of the mixtape I burned for her]

im currently waiting to get my haircut sitting on a couch. one woman comes in sitting on the far side of the couch announcing “im going to sit in the sun” while glaring at me and another comes in sitting as close as she can to the other lady who says “doesn’t it feel so nice to sit in the sunny side of things?” the other woman nods in agreement while looking directly at me. theres no sun on or near this couch. is that older woman code for ‘don’t sit next to the non-gender conforming goth in all black’?


Happy 52nd Birthday my immortal cheek bone king ¬