weird shit i find at work

anonymous asked:

how to ask crush for time/place they were born so you could see their birthchart

hahaha shit i’m still figuring how to do that without sounding weird. tbh just make some false shit up . just be like “damn i just read some article that says if youre a morning baby… ya know like you were born in the morning means youre more likely to be introverted..damn…you think thats true? what time were you born?”

lmao please dont actually try that. the chances of it working are probs slim. tbh idk its weird to ask. just find out the hospital they were born at and hack the system. 

akira-manami asked:

Ne ne, Shiren~ How did you and Kimito become a couple? I really reaaaally want to know how. (And I bet a lot of people want to know too.) Also! How does Kimito feel about those fanarts and fanfics about you and your twin brother, Gyu?

Shiren: *grumbles* We’re not a couple, damn it… 

Shiren: Hmph. If you’re asking how we met then it’s because the squad Kimi-chan is part of always ended up working with mine. We pissed each other off a lot–we still do–but I guess we eventually decided to let our frustration out in… other ways. 

Shiren: Kimi-chan likes to think that he’s the best person I’ve ever slept with so his ego’s big enough to not give a shit about the fanarts. But he does find it weird that there are people who ship me with my twin… I bet he’s just jealous~

anonymous asked:

I've always been facinated with the Dover demon. It's just kinda there?? Like no ones really seen it and we know jack shit about it. Its weird looking and small and probably confused. It just exists. Out there doin it's thing.

it’s funny you mention the dover demon because the au i’m working on that has all of the cryptids and other supernatural creatures takes place in massachusetts and honestly can you imagine going into your backyard and finding this thing just chilling there

it’s a pissed off forest alien


Okay I know this might be sort of weird but I’m really not into guys who are super fit and have a six pack and all of that.  While I appreciate their hard work and the fact that they take good care of their bodies (*hopefully in most cases*), it’s just not really my thing.  I honestly think chubby/soft guys are so cute.  I don’t know I just find them so adorable yet sexy and it’s such a turn on.  Everyone always gives me shit for it but I just am not super attracted to guys with a ton of muscles.  I love the dad bod.  I worship the dad bod.  The dad bod is a great thing. 

A Menagerie of Mugs

Whenever I’m bereft of any creative inspiration, I tend to just slap some anatomical oddities on caricatures of celebrities whose work I enjoy. You probably won’t recognize anybody other than Tommy; I don’t really care to make recognizable caricatures. I find it more enjoyable to use a celebrity’s face as a jumping-off point for weird shit. Like that goblin. I’m sure that was based on some famous fuck, but it’s inconsequential, because my goal was to make a goddamn goblin. Look at that shit. Look at that fucking goblin.

Alternatively I just punch in a basic emotion into Google Images and base a face on some random jagoff in a stock photo. Gets me the same result.

behead all those who insult islam

I find it so weird that’s I’ve become pretty desensitized to porn.

I’ve been looking at nsfw fanart all day today, I’ve seen so many dicks, and I didn’t really feel anything.

But as soon as I try writing one of my smut fics, I get all flustered and I won’t go back to it for another month. What the hell, me? I wanna get shit done!

I’m really curious as to how yall find out so much information about your faves lives. Like 5sos or 1D or Zayn are seen with someone and then 20 seconds later yall know who their 3rd grade teacher was shit is weird do yall put this much effort into your school work? I’m asking for your mom.

I had another cool dream!

Ok, so I dreamed that I was this business guy who was apparently part robot who worked with some kind of  huuuuge network business with my father. Like, me and my father in the dream were the BOSSES of this world. It reminded a bit of Borderlands in a way o:

Ok so we get this weird customer wanting to buy something so his grounds could access the network (because without the network nothing works at all. Think of skynet, like. That shit was EVERYWHERE). Aaaand… turns out as I’m sitting in my office with him and my father in front of me, dude drugged my coffee and I passed out. When I woke up again, the entire building was completely dark except some red warning lights saying “error:Connecton failed” and stuff like that. The network had been shut down and I was like wtf? And I couldn’t find anybody. Some of the building had signs from there being some kind of huge fight and apparently I’ve slept through it all somehow.

Anyway, I walk around and  get attacked by some bad guys who were  assumingly with the customer guy from earlier and I had to run. On my way to flee, I meet this HUGE guy wearing a black mask and fully armed and he’s honestly the coolest guy I’ve ever seen. I’ll just call him Noir because that’s french for black and he had a black mask it was so cool.

So, Noir helps me flee the bandits and we get to a boat to get out of there. We end up on the coast of the desert, and we decide to try and find out who was behind it all and what happened and so on. I meet a lot of people in the desert city we came to and I got all these kind of quests and I had a menu and stuff for my items (very much like a video game, and also I was part robot so it kinda made sense).

I met like a butcher’s family, and their son had a crush on me and he had a sister and omfg it was such a cool dream. Lots of bandits, quests and Noir and omfg YES

I’m so glad I have adventourous dreams sometimes

Also, I could make myself invisible!!

anonymous asked:

i found this blog from a reblogged post on emetophiliacs and i was going through your writing because i love finding new material and your style is great, and then i saw your fic rec list you posted and???? dude. i'm the writer of "fine, we're damaged." and i kind of laughed / screamed when i saw one of my works in your list of recs. this is just such a weird coincidence? holy shit?? ok mY POINT IS i'm super flattered and i just wanted to stop by and say thank you :^)

WAHH that’s so exciting! fine, we’re damaged has definitely got to be one of my top top TOP favorite solangelo pieces, no lie. I actually went back and reread it for like the gazillionth time after I posted that rec list. I don’t even know what to say anymore AHGWHZBSIXBDJS

I miss my dad
I’m incredibly stressed
My eating disorder isn’t even active as much as “whatever man. I just don’t fucking care”
The anti depressant I am taking doesn’t seem to be helping (though I’m giving it more time, considering my life since I started taking it hasn’t been…uh…well. It’s sucked more than usual) and it’s causing my already fucked up heart to fuck up more
I almost passed out at work today from a panic attack
My car is being weird
I have another vehicle that needs towed but I’m unable to find the key
My sleep has been really off lately
I’m broke AF
My roommate doesn’t have a job, yet doesn’t do shit around the house. Like I basically have to beg him to get toilet paper. And he acts like some kind of proud martyr if he does the dishes
My room is such a mess I want to cry
I can’t play guitar right now because I feel like I won’t play well enough to do it justice in daddy’s memory, but I want the first song I play when I pick it up again to be one of “our” songs

Basically fuck everything I want to curl up and sleep for days. And instead I go to work and try to keep my at my desk breakdowns to less than three a day.

The only good thing I have right now is that I decided to quit smoking and start dancing again. Might as well save the money from cigs and beer and spend it on something I 1)love and 2) isn’t bad for me

And also 3) will help me get thin again

1/30/16: a tribe called red - native puppy love

the best, most entertainingly silly track off a tribe called red’s self-titled debut. though i generally find the second album to be stronger, this track’s ridiculous use of shattering sound effects, airhorns, and everything that makes hip-hop beats sound cheesy and inauthentic really work in weird, funny tandem.

more a tribe called red
a tribe called red
shit like this

Ewwwww half the pictures and images aren’t show up on my dash and its being weird. Guess I’ll finish writing for my new muses and head over to my flight rising to grind. Feel free to send me asks I guess, I’m working on art and an official meeting for my muses but if you click One Big What??, you can find the new muses and start interactions with them!

My Current Project Priority List

1. The re-work of Azatlan Rising. I deleted a nearly finished book in a panic when shit got weird with my pills. This rewrite is gonna focus on 3 characters that were background characters in the original. Alaw Pirry, a human cavalier, Kieran Timbersong, a half-orc sorceress, and Felix Thunderbrand, a Dragonborn bard who was raised by dwarves.

2. Outergate. I have about 3 issues worth of content written out, but I need to find an artist. Outergate is a tale of 3 trans adventurers that would rather be at home smoking pot and eating pizza than diving into dungeons. Weed, and pizza don’t pay for themselves, right?

3. A collection of short stories detailing the full back stories of Razal, Kayla Longriver, Vesha, Nalin Ironcaster, Alaw, Kieran, Felix, and Wenona.

4. My magical library thing. I have a hook for an adventure, but I know there is a novella in it somewhere, maybe in conjunction with my atypical bard-as- chronicler idea.

5. The street sorcerer thing that I’ve been putting off working on for months.

adam is an ass but i still feel kind of sympathetic towards him :\ he wasn’t always like this so he’s probably been through some shit that made him become blinded by hate / anger… anyways he didn’t want to work for cinder and got forced into it :\ i hope he gets his ass beat but also i hope he finds some chill