weird tee

oh hon, i have headcanons for days (ok a stretch but have fun with this)

  • is one of the sweetest boy you’ll ever meet but he has a darker side that not many people see
  • point in case: he’s kind and lovable, but he’s not a total pushover
  • he has some very…interesting punishments that involve teasing you
  • once he woke you up with oral only to leave you hanging and he spent the rest of the day rubbing against you and whispering in your ear how much he wants you
  • you were so worked up that when he visited your room, he didn’t have to do much to get you gyrating on his lap
  • tease him back and see what happens…
  • mostly, he doesn’t mind submitting to you but when he breaks…ooh boy
  • lets just say that that headband has more than one use to keep his hair from his face
  • he’s tied your hands behind your back with it as he gave you oral in the kitchen
  • he’s taken you from behind as your hands were bound with his head band and you were soreee for days
  • you can’t look at his headband without blushing and thinking about the last time he took you
  • stamina for daaayysss
  • when he gets going, Hunk’ll give you two orgasms before he thinks of taking his pleasure
  • he makes it his goal when he has all the time of the day to fuck you until you can’t walk the next morning
  • “i hope you have nothing important to do tomorrow, baby because you’re not gonna walk much,” and he’ll say this with such a sweet smile, you think you misheard him
  • so selfless with his ministrations
  • he loves giving you oral bc he thinks you look like a Goddess with your thighs splayed and your teeth catching on your bottom lip
  • those thick fingers drive you wild with how callous they are and how they feel sooo good rubbing on your g-spot
  • praise kink and secretly kinky
  • he has a sadistic streak in that he loves hearing you beg for his cock
  • it doesn’t have to be anything explicit, just say, “I need you in me,” and he’s already fired up even though he’s spent half the day teasing you
  • tell him how good he feels in you and he’ll m e l t
  • actually, tell him how good he makes you feel and he’ll fall deeper in love with you
  • his scalp is really sensitive so when you make out with him, pls tug on his hair, it’ll have him moaning
  • starts of innocently by asking what are your fantasies, and you think it’s just that but then he tries his damnedest to fulfill them and you’re lowkey surprised and flattered
  • a list of devious things Hunk has done:
  1. has fingered you in a empty hallway during a Gala when he had one too many glasses of nunvil (you were too pretty and he’s weak for your pleading eyes)
  2. (speaking of eyes, keep your gaze on him when you’re sucking him off. he loves how beautiful you look with your lips wrapped around him)
  3. kitchen sex was definitely a given when the both of you spent a day baking
  4. surprisingly, he’s let you sucked him off in Yellow (he was really stressed from a mission and ofc he switched off his comms – he doesn’t want anyone else to hear you)
  • how to break Hunk (a DIY kit for all your Hunk-tastic needs):
  1. wear thigh highs (he’s got a thing for legs)
  2. Hunk has a secret lingerie kink so use that info wisely
  3. if you walk into a room wearing nothing but heels, our boy’s gonna ascend to the 7th heaven
  4. straddle his face. he’s got an…uhh…affinity for face sitting
  5. talk dirty to him (he’s not much of a talker himself so by all means, pls take the lead in that aspect)
  6. tell him he can cum in you bc you’re safe that day (slight impregnation kink??)
  • is a babbler when he approaches his climax
  • when he comes, he’s almost incoherent
  • aaahh–(Y/N), pl-please–guhhh oh baby I’mgonnacumI’mgonnacum
  • he’s so gentle with you afterwards
  • Hunk will try his best to give you everything bc he loves you so much
  • ‘everything’ can range to extra blankets, a hot drink or even a lullaby
  • he has a great singing voice that verges on slightly monotonous, but he’ll sing you to sleep with some Samoan lullabies his moms taught him
  • sometimes, you’ll both just stay up and talk until morning breaks bc he’s just so easy to talk to, and c’mon, he’s best friends with Lance so he’s heard it all
  • doesn’t even blink when you tell him you hope to get arrested one day just to fulfill a bucket list
  • “yeah, Lance has the same aspirations. Lemme just put this out here– I’m not bailing anybody out.”
  • “but, babe–”
  • “nope, I’ve got a rep to maintain as the most trusted Paladin.”
  • of course he bails you and Lance out when you both get into trouble. he loves you both too much not to do it.

In case you were wondering, here’s my vintage, one of a kind copy of FWN. Complete with sticky goo on the cover. Yes, everyone this is what we did in the early 00s. We made cds for each other, decorated them and gave them out as presents. Totally a lost art today. I recommend it.


What is normal anyways? Nobody knows… so keep doing you!

This is a tee and a sticker in my RedBubble store!

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