weeds not a real drug

anonymous asked:

i need a list of all the stupid shit no one would expect Bitty to do other than trying to pick Tater up on the ice

okay so i had this half written and then didnt touch my computer for a week oops. so a list of stupid shit bitty has done that no one expects despite the fact he is a college student, a hockey player, a boy, and only 21:

  1. shotgunned a beer at 10am the friday before finals bc fuck his life he’d been studying all week and if he aint ready now hes never gonna be
  2. once nearly took out the legs of the dining room table trying to escape a post workout holster by sliding through the kitchen
  3. ate a cold pizza straight from the box for breakfast because he was running late to class and it had been left on the table the night before
  4. nearly fell off the roof while smoking with shitty and lardo
  5. actually fell into the school swimming pool when the current seniors decided they wanted to break into the pool at 3am on a whim
  6. nearly got arrested for trespassing in the park after dark bc shitty decided he wanted to play frisbee in the dark at 11pm
    1. bitty actually was the least likely to get arrested considering he straight up vaulted over a short brick wall and tore down the side of hill away from the cop car
    2. the others were honestly really impressed with his reaction time
  7. did several chinese fire drills with the frogs the last time they drove to providence to see the falcs play (nursey nearly didn’t make it back into the car the very last time)
  8. did a shot of absinthe to prove that his alcohol tolerence was amazing fuck you very much zack jimmermann
  9. woke up the next morning on the cursed couch with a box of mickey d’s chicken nuggets sitting on his stomach and possibly a rash from said cursed couch
  10. bus surfed (as in, balancing in the aisles without holding on not on top of the bus) on the local bus and nearly killed an old lady
  11. rode down the Haus stairs in a laundry basket bc other than lardo and foxtrot he was the only one who would fit (lardo was too stressed and foxtrot has done some stupid shit with the boys but she at least has that much sense)

honestly i could probably come up with more but this was getting long

anonymous asked:

ya tryna be lowkey but u should totally do some more stoner keith hcs lmao

y’all asked and i’m about to deliver (i’m supposed to be doing my assignments rn but what the hecky becky) 

  • broganes once walked to the store while high and shiro pushed keith into the stacked tins of beans in the middle of the store. they were swiftly asked to leave - no surprise
  • keith’s mama stopped him when he came home one night bc he smelt “weird” and she was giving him the suspicious side eyes. keith had to stand there and tell her it was BO bc he hadn’t showered in like 4 days (avoiding getting in trouble of course) his mama has never given him a more disappointed look lmfao
  • keith has nearly set his mullet on fire trying to light up about 7 times
  • keith’s first time getting stoned was at a house party and it wasn’t even intentional. these other kids were smoking around him and he felt too uncomfortable to say anything but lol after 20 minutes he was best pals with that entire group and high as a fookin kite mdude
  • keith makes shiro go on fastfood runs as a form of payment before he allows him to get high with him  
  • keith sends lance and hunk snaps of himself when he’s high. sometimes he even skypes with either of them and he’ll end up falling asleep in the skype call (bonus: lance takes screenshots and posts them on twitter)
  • one time keith got high at his cousins birthday party and ate so much cake he puked in his own lap 

not to sound like a pothead but c’mon we know that in warrior cats, certain cats fuckin. blaze it up w/ catnip like alll the time, medicine cats have to protect a certain area of it but w/ the rest they’re like “fucking fine u animals”

i have this image in my head of darkstripe, one of the most…pothead wc characters ever, just standing by the river at the border between riverclan and thunderclan just staring at it, looking at it so lost

and longtail goes up to him like “um. hey what are you doing.”

“dude this is the longest thunderpath ever. i dont think i’ll be able to cross it all these monsters keep passing by.”

“…..you’re standing at the river.”

“wha- OH SHIT lol man sorry im high as fuck rn”