wedding tips

6

DIY bespoke flower crown

By LadyLand

Getting married soon? Use inexpensive baby’s breath (gypsophila) to make a beautiful floral headpiece, perfect for yourself, or your bridesmaids. It’s unbelievably easy, plus you can dry it afterwards and use again for festivals or fancy dress. Here’s how:

1. Take the longest stem of baby’s breath and pluck off all the flowers except the very end bunch.

2. Next, take a small bunch of the removed flowers and tape them to the stalk, close to the top bunch. Repeat all the way along the stem, fastening the ends of the previous bunch as you go.

3. When the stem is completely covered, bend it into a head-sized circle and fasten the ends with tape, tucking any remaining stem back into the crown and taping to secure – this will give your crown extra strength.

4. Fill any gaps with more flowers, then wrap a length of wide satin ribbon all the way around the crown in between each bunch of flowers.

5. Fasten the ribbon ends into a bow. Et voilà! Your flower crown is complete.

Wedding Planning

1. Think of traditions as suggestions. There is no right or wrong, just what you want. Nothing bad will happen if you decide to not have a bouquet toss, favours or your standard wedding invitation. One of the things my partner and I have cut from our wedding is having a cake, we personally felt it just wasn’t for us and thought it better we save the money.

2. Email, email, email!
It certainly is annoying, but you may just save yourself a few hundred dollars by making sure to get a good variety of quotes from an array of businesses.

3. Once you have placed a deposit, do not keep looking.
So often people end up experiencing feelings of regret once they have officially locked in things like their wedding dress and venue, thinking maybe something better exists. The reality is there is a million gorgeous venues and dresses, but what you have chosen is just as fabulous! So, keep staring at what will be yours and let yourself fall more in love with it!

4. Don’t rush decisions!
This is something that I have done on more than one occasion while planning my wedding. Whist I haven’t made a decision I regret, I definitely did go through periods of anxiety at some points simply due to rushing myself as if my wedding needed to be planned within 24 hours. Take your time and try to enjoy the planning phase as much as you can.

5. Don’t let pressure from others get to you.
This one can sometimes be quite hard as some people can be really pushy. But, at the end of the day I see it as your day, your choice. You don’t HAVE to invite your cousin’s brother’s auntie’s sister if you don’t want to.

6. Make a list of what things (aside from your husband/wife and celebrant) are important to you to have on the day.
For me, it was my photographer and having a videographer, so I made sure to plan my budget around these things so that I didn’t miss out.

What are some wedding tips that you have? Feel free to share them by sending me a comment or message!

Charlotte xx

Things I wish I knew before I got engaged

1.     Engagement periods can take over your life

At first the engagement period is the most exciting time, and it should be! (celebrate it), but pretty soon depending on how soon you decide you want your wedding this beautiful period of time can just become one big wedding conversation- with literally everybody (and anybody). It’s really important to carve time out for yourself and for you and your partner to have wedding free time.

2.     Fight to keep your wedding your own

Everyone thinks they’re a wedding planner when you get engaged. There’s plenty of people who are trying to do a nice thing and help you out with suggestions but its very easy to quickly get overwhelmed. Especially when weddings can bring out the “I know everything” mentality. Be select in who you allow to have an influence in your wedding and make sure you don’t allow yourself to get swallowed in their ideas of what your wedding should be rather than your ideas for your wedding.

3.     Communication is key

The part that makes wedding planning the most difficult is communication. Because depending on your partner’s and your family dynamics there’s often a bunch of people who have very differing opinions and expectations.  Chronic people pleases need to find a way to have hard conversations about their expectations for their wedding and family member’s roles in the lead up- the earlier the better, there’s nothing worse then ending up with a wedding that you don’t feel is your own at all.

4.     Research will make your budget happy

This one’s a balance. Some people will blow their budgets out with a longer time, because the idea they started with for their wedding was before they saw all the amazing glamorous weddings out there. And to a degree a shorter engagement period can help with that. But also research will save you a tonne of money. Finding the best vendor for your price point and style will take time. There’s no shame in going on some vendor stalking from some friends (if they’re happy to share) or hunting down the corners of the internet so you can find that great  photographer no one has ever found before. And sometimes this can take a tonne of time. if you time poor perhaps event organisers are going to be your saving grace.

5.     DIY -  be ready for some pinterest fails

Lets be real, the internet is full of some beautiful do it yourself wedding décor. And while that’s great there’s a level of these that are really making these things professional. What says it may only take 20 minutes may eventually take 3 hours, because well maybe you’re not as much the arty type as you would like to believe.  DIY can be time consuming and painful and can sometimes completely fail, be prepared for your idea to go sideways a few times, and make sure that you do a few practice ones.  After practice ones assemble and army, make a day of it and hang out with the girls to get it done. And dear lord absolutely do NOT leave it last minute – there is absolutely nothing that will make you more stressed then fiddling with craft and a hot glue gun while you cry at 11pm one week before your wedding. Be prepared and do it beforehand!

How To Girl: Highlighting and Contouring #HowToGirlNyc

Like Irene Adler is engaged before she ever even sees Holmes, which he is aware of. He sees her in disguise for like 2 minutes, and the next time he sees her (also in disguise) he serves as a witness at her wedding and she tips him!!! He laughs his ass off about it and puts the tip on his watch chain as a souvenir. Watson says like a zillion times that Holmes never loved a woman, and Holmes also confirms that he never loved a woman. Holmes/Adler is like. Really bad straight people fanon that comes from literally nowhere.

10 Tips for Married Brothers

1. Dress up for your wife, look clean and smell good. Just like the husband wants his wife to look nice for him, she also wants her husband to dress up for her too. Remember that the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) would always start with Miswak when returning home and always loved the sweetest smells.

2. Use the best names for your wife. Call your wife by the most beloved names to her, and avoid using names that hurt their feelings.

3. Don’t treat her like a fly. We never think about a fly in our daily lives until it ‘bugs’ us. Similarly, a wife will do well all day – which brings no attention from the husband – until she does something to ‘bug’ him. Don’t treat her like this; recognize all the good that she does and focus on that.

4. If you see wrong from your wife, try being silent and do not comment! This is one of the ways the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) used when he would see something inappropriate from his wives . It’s a technique that few Muslim men have mastered.

5. Smile at your wife whenever you see her and embrace her often. Smiling is Sadaqah and your wife is not exempt from the Muslim Ummah. Imagine life with her constantly seeing you smiling. Remember also those Ahadith when the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) would kiss his wife before leaving for Salaah, even when he was fasting.

6. Thank her for all that she does for you. Then thank her again! Take for example a dinner at your house. She makes the food, cleans the home, and a dozen other tasks to prepare. And sometimes the only acknowledgment she receives is that there needed to be more salt in the soup. Don’t let that be; thank her!

7. Ask her to write down the last ten things you did for her that made her happy. Then go and do them again. It may be hard to recognize what gives your wife pleasure. You don’t have to play a guessing game, ask her and work on repeating those times in your life.

8. Don’t belittle her desires. Comfort her. Sometimes the men may look down upon the requests of their wives. The Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) set the example for us in an incident when Safiyyah (RA) was crying because, as she said, he had put her on a slow camel. He wiped her tears, comforted her, and brought her the camel.

9. Be humorous and play games with your wife. Look at how the Prophet (saw) would race with his wife Aisha (radiallahu anha) in the desert. When was the last time we did something like that?

10. Always remember the words of Allah’s Messenger (sallallahu alayhi wasallam): ‘The best of you are those who treat their families the best. And I am the best amongst you to my family.’ Try to be the best!

Make dua to Allah ta’ala to make your marriage successful. And Allah Ta’ala knows best!!

10

Quintis Wedding Countdown
Day 1 - Favorite Season One Episode: 1x19, Young Hearts Spark Fire

“I chose in the moment to live honestly, and if you don’t feel the same way yet, I’m OK with it.”
“You’re confident.”
“In this I am.”

It’s hard to narrow down to one episode per season, but I love so much about 1x19. The bookend Happy/Toby scenes on the roof, his insistence that she not run from acting on her feelings in 1x18 (the kiss), profession of love, gorgeous foreshadowing for the eventual proposal, and an amazing profession of faith. “I choose in the moment to live honestly, and if you don’t feel the same way yet, I’m OK with it.” And the visuals in that final scene on the rooftop will leave you breathless.

So you're pl*nning a wedding.

I am by no means good at planning weddings.  I didn’t even really, like, LOVE the planning process of my wedding.  To me, it was all business, like directing one of the plays at the high school.  Get costumes, order props, check the scripts.  It’s a dinner theater?  Let’s meet with the caterer.  I didn’t get that ooey-gooey feeling that my MOH is getting over HER wedding (which is in two months; God help us).    

When I went dress shopping, I went one place and tried on seven dresses before settling on my chosen gown that met my criteria.  (MOH? 22.)  I probably got most excited about the dress when it was finally fitted a month before the wedding.  Then I was like, YAY! Looky at meee!

I’m telling you all this in case you’re going into pl*nning your wedding and you’re not all stars and sparkles and ooeygooey feelings.  That’s okay.  You’re fine.

Here are some tips I have for you as you pl*n.

1. I highly recommend this book. For the Amazon price, it’s a freaking STEAL, because it’s BIG paperback of everything you need to know for weddings.  We used it to get ideas initially, referenced it on how to write our invites and vows, and the best part was its recommended timeline.

In the back of the book it tells you month by month (and then by weeks) of what to accomplish step by step as you plan your wedding.  I’m telling ya, it was a life saver to keep me organized while I was working in the spring, buying a house, and then moving.  

2.  Along the timeline idea, you must knock out your big three expenses right away: Book the photographer, book the locations for ceremony and/or reception, and book your caterer.  Next in importance is your DJ and baker if you’re seeking a “big name” to do it.  We planned a year head in a wee little Indiana town, and we couldn’t get two photographers, one location, and a baker blew us off because apparently they like to take vacations during prime wedding season.  

3.  Set your budget and work down from big ticket items.  Now, my parents handled the money (yes; I am spoiled … and loved), but if you plan on doing a big dinner/dance reception, anticipate over half your costs to be reception related.  Don’t rush out and buy all these itty decor items that waste your money up front that you may need to get the DJ/baker/photag, etc. you want.  (Again, that book has a recommended budget breakdown.  I used it as a guide, and then redistributed money from areas we weren’t using, like video services.)

4.  Put names and numbers on RSVP cards.  I really regret not doing this, but really, it wasn’t the end of the world.  But it would’ve been so much easier for head counts to write their names on the cards (“Mr. and Mrs. John Smith”) and how many seats we reserved for them (4), and then let them check “accept or decline.”  Our Chicago friends did this for their wedding, and I’ve never seen it done in my area, so I didn’t do it.  Wish I did.  Oh well.  

5.  Speaking of RSVPs:  Accept that it’s going to infuriate you.  After our RSVP deadline, we had to personally contact an absurd amount of people to personally ask them if they were coming to the wedding, because apparently writing on a pre-addressed, stamped card was too hard.  And even then, after emails and Facebook messages, people still didn’t reply.  I was honestly too irritated with some people to bother having my feelings hurt.  

6.  Don’t get upset about the no-shows.  We did sit back after the wedding and take stock of who RSVPd yes and didn’t show.  Not that we were angry or bitter, but we did notice after the fact –that’s just it, though … AFTER.  Like, I didn’t sit there during my wedding and pout because a coworker wasn’t there.  The family and close friends I really, really wanted there came, and the extended acquaintances, former students, and coworkers who also came genuinely made us glad to see them.  We did stop and go, “Oh, Jane didn’t come….” but then we said, “Oh well!”

7.  If you are paying for food ahead of time, plan for leftovers.  Since we paid for the finger-food buffet in advance, we could take it all home.  So, I now have a ton of meatballs in my freezer.  But a lot of the food we took to the nearby fire station, the emergency room nurses’ station, and the police department just so we didn’t have to deal with it.  We made many people happy that night.  

8.  Please be green and money savvy with your decor.  I made it very clear I didn’t want centerpieces I’d be stuck with after the wedding trying to resell in some way, like 25 hurricane lamps and tea lights.  That’s why I went with the books as centerpieces, because it was cheaper and I could keep them all to enjoy later. The flower accents I made were very affordable and is really the only thing left from the wedding I can’t use right now.  

TL;DR

At the end of the day you’re married.  And you’re going to have at least one melt down before you get there (mine was over seating arrangements), but don’t lose sight of the goal: YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED.  Don’t lose your head.  And don’t feel like you have to be an ooey-gooey Pinterest Bride to have the best day ever.

Wedding Tips.

Be realistic in your wedding planning. Sometimes people tend to go overboard with their budget because they want to have it all. If you spend more in one area, then see where else you can reduce the cost.

Buy a comfy dress. You will be wearing it for a long time.

Get a photographer that you connect with and understands what you want.

Just be prepared to think on your feet. Incase things do go wrong eg: rain. 

Make sure the relevant people have a list of emergency contacts. Give a phone list of (caterers, decoration hire company, cake guy, both sets of parents plus maid of honour and best man) to several key players in our day. Unplanned things WILL happen - like cakes disappearing (and a VERY nervous best man could ring you asking where it was) or it could rain - don’t get caught up too much in the “this should have happened”, just be solutions based!

SERIOUSLY BRING A MINI SEWING KIT! Zippers can bust, straps can snap, buttons can fall off… Just be prepared. 

Straws for the ladies in the bridal party, so yo don’t mush your lippie while enjoying a drink getting ready and during photos.

Sit up straight!! Improve your posture - it makes you look slimmer in photos.

Groomsmen!! Don’t put anything in your pockets of pants - bulge shows up in photos! 

Make sure you give your florist a sample of your wedding dress fabric - you don’t want white ribbon around bouquet if your dress is ivory. Better still get your dressmaker to make your ribbon from your dress scraps - looks perfect. 

JUST BREATHE & HAVE FUN!

How To Plan A Perfect Wedding

       

DECOR

1. Take Stock of Your Location

Do a walk-through of your venue as soon as you’re able, noting features to highlight – a grand staircase or a grove of trees, perhaps – and areas that need to be spruced up or downplayed.

2. Get Glowing

Lighting can make or break an event, but to create the right ambience, you don’t necessarily need to hire professionals to cast patterns on the dance floor. You can set the mood simply by flanking an outdoor walkway with dozens of luminaria or setting dining tables with elegant candelabra or clusters of small candles; you might also replace harsh white bulbs in fixtures with more flattering amber ones.

3. Dress Up Your Entryway

Beautiful front-door decorations, which can be as low-key as swags of greenery, serve as a visual welcome whether adorning a building or a tent and ensure that everyone’s first glimpse of the party is from its best vantage point.

           

4. Work with What You Have

An all-white theme won’t do in a hotel ballroom papered in red and gold, nor does it make sense to try to transform a rustic lodge into the Crystal Palace.

5. Choose a Theme

Whether it’s a monogram, a color pairing, or a food or flower that evokes a favorite place, a repeated element helps to both personalize and unify your event.

6. Don’t Overlook Small Details

A few well-placed touches, such as monogrammed cocktail napkins or an interesting charger, can go a long way toward making your party look extra-special.

7. Think Outside the Box

A silver bowl of sugared fruit makes a stunning and unexpected alternative to a traditional floral centerpiece, and one long banquet table may fit a sleekly modern space better than several round ones do.

8. Size Up Your Centerpieces

Keep floral arrangements and other table decor under 14 or over 20 inches high, so guests can view and converse with each other across the table.

               

PLANNING

9. Build in Flexibility

Look for ways that allow you to change things easily at the last minute. The seating cards below keep names and table numbers separate, so you can shift guests’ assignments without having to rewrite the cards.

                 

 10. Tackle Big Tasks First

Your immediate “to do” list: Book the venue, hire a caterer, decide on basic decor. With these major tasks done, you’ll be ready to focus on the smaller details.

11. Know Your Time Line

You’ll need to choose your florist at least six months ahead of time and reserve your party rentals two months after that.

12. Send Save-the-Dates

Especially if you are planning a destination wedding or marrying on a holiday, ask guests to mark their calendars. Ideally, mail out these announcements at least four months before the wedding.

13. Invite Carefully

Be prepared: Up to 80 to 90 percent of those invited may attend. (The smaller the list, the more yeses you should expect percentage-wise, because you will likely be asking only those closest to you.)

14. Get It in Writing

Make sure you have signed contracts from all your vendors and that you’ve read the fine print and resolved any questions.

15. Map Out Your Space

Be sure you have ample room for tables (figure 10 to 15 square feet per person, assuming that the tables are round and seat six to 10 guests); also check that the dance floor is big enough (four to five square feet per guest is about right).

16. Arrange for a Backup

Planning an outdoor reception? You can’t count on sunshine, so either reserve a tent or opt for a location with an indoor alternative in the event of inclement weather.

17. Enlist Help

Even if you’ve decided against an overall wedding planner, you’ll want a cool-headed pro on hand to ask guests to be seated for dinner, help organize toasts, and handle any problems. Ask if your venue can provide this service; if not, some independent planners will work for a single day.

18. Don’t Let the Seams Show

If possible, designate a separate cocktail area and close the reception space to early arrivals. To create a sense of drama, neither you nor your guests should see the behind-the-scenes machinations and last-minute setup gaffes. Keeping the doors closed will also let your photographer take unhurried shots of the reception decor before the crowd arrive

19. Whip Up Affordable Favors

Stylish tokens needn’t be expensive. These biodegradable bowls (below) look sumptuous when wrapped with gauzy fabric and labeled with paper strips that are laser printed in a pretty font. Fill with mini meringues, an economical treat; either make them yourself or ask your caterer to provide them.

        

20. Go for Daytime Drama

Many venues charge more for after-dark affairs. With an outdoor reception, if you opt for a luncheon event, you’ll also cut back on or eliminate costs associated with lighting, such as setup and generators.

21. Narrow Your Tables

By seating diners family-style at long tables no wider than 36 inches, you’ll shrink the amount of empty space to decorate, cutting down on centerpiece costs. Guests will still have plenty of room and will find conversation easier as well.

22. Reuse Your Blooms

There’s no reason why ceremony flowers can’t come to the reception. Ask for altar arrangements that will also complement the party site. Alternatively, your florist may be able to refashion them into small gift bouquets for your bridal party.

23. Play with Time

You’ll save on liquor, food, and possibly vendors’ fees if you shave 30 minutes or an hour off the party. So it doesn’t feel rushed, cut a little from everything (make the cocktail hour a “cocktail 45 minutes”) instead of eliminating events.

24. Consider a Full-Service Deal

A site with a fee that includes necessities such as linens and furniture may at first appear more expensive than an a la carte venue, but once you factor in rental fees, you may ultimately keep costs down.

25. Stay in One Place

Have your wedding and reception in the same location. You’ll spend less on decor as well as on transportation costs for you and your wedding attendants.

26. Rethink Humble Decorations

Balloons have long been used to fill party spaces at low cost. For a sophisticated feel, opt for a few large balloons instead of masses of birthday-party-style ones. Those with a diameter of 36 inches have an elegant globe shape.

         

HOSPITALITY

27. Put Big Smiles on Little Faces

Young guests will enjoy goody bags that are all theirs. Fill a toteable container like below with treats that aren’t messy, such as age-appropriate toys, or animal crackers. Add paper and washable crayons, and kids might even create one-of-a-kind cards for the bride and groom.

        

28. Eschew the Receiving Line

If you will be hosting more than 50 people, the traditional meet-and-greet can take an hour or more. For groups of this size, it’s more gracious of the newlyweds to thank guests by visiting every table.

29. Tame the Toasts

An unplanned ramble can interrupt the flow of a party and make everyone uncomfortable. Encourage spur-of-the-moment speeches at the rehearsal dinner so the reception includes only words from the host, the newlyweds, and the best man and maid of honor. If you’re concerned that your speakers may overindulge, schedule toasts to take place early in the festivities.

30. Break the Ice

At a less formal reception, a short written quiz about you and your new husband, with questions about where you met and how he proposed, can get conversation started between guests who’ve never met.

31. Set a Time Limit

Your guests have already spent hours, if not days, at prewedding events and at the ceremony itself; they’re likely to be tired. Though you may wish the reception would never end, it should last no more than five hours. Also, make it clear that any after parties you schedule are entirely optional.

32. Add Thoughtful Extras

A few small comfort items are always appreciated. Consider stashing a basket of inexpensive slippers near the dance floor for women who are tired of their high heels. Have hand lotion, tissues, or hair spray in the restrooms. At an outdoor fete, stock sunscreen, bug repellent, paper fans, and perhaps even a few cozy wraps for the women in case of a sudden evening chill.

33. Restrain Yourselves

Less is more when it comes to a wedding reception, so consider ditching the 30-minute video montage or the fireworks display for something less elaborate. Even a gesture as simple as distributing sparklers at night’s end can charm guests and keep them from feeling overloaded.

34. Keep Your Helpers Happy

Your hospitality should extend to photographers, videographers, waiters, and musicians, as well as any other vendors working at your reception. Make sure they have water, scheduled breaks, and, most important, a meal. It need not be the same one that you’re serving to guests, but it should be nourishing and delicious.

35. Offer Small Amusements

Unexpected entertainment is wonderful when your guests tire of dancing. A portrait station of do-it-yourself Polaroids, a cigar roller, or a strolling palm reader can offer a touch of surprise and whimsy.

36. Have Fun with Finger Food

Hors d'oeuvres are best when they are easy to serve and eat. You’re offering a choice, so go ahead and pick something exotic; plan on about six options and six pieces per person. 

37. Show Off a Beautiful Cake

You may be able to afford a premium baker even on a tight budget. Skip labor-intensive iced decorations and ask for a simpler style, then dress it up with ribbon and fresh flowers. Be sure the flowers you use are food safe and pesticide free.

                            

38. Be Seated

If your budget allows, pamper guests with a plated meal instead of a buffet – it’s an especially nice gesture. If you’d prefer a buffet, be sure to have enough serving stations to prevent long lines, and ask your caterer to prepare and serve plates of food for any elderly guests in attendance.

39. Set Up a “Nonalcoholic” Bar

For an event that includes many children or abstaining adults, consider having a separate table with sparkling and flat water, as well as a spirit-free version of your signature drink if you’re serving one.

40. Streamline the Bar

There’s no need at many weddings to stock your bar with a full selection of liquor. A red and a white wine, a sparkling wine, and a signature cocktail (like the “mintinis”) are plenty, and they’re economical to boot.

41. Limit Your Courses
Unless the meal will be the focus of the evening, as with an intimate party at a five-star restaurant, your menu can consist of an appetizer, an entree, and a dessert (the last could even be the wedding cake).

42. Serve a Mini Meal

If you choose to have an after party, you’ll need to provide refreshments, such as a light buffet of snacks or breakfast treats. Plan on enough for about one-quarter to one-third of your total original invitees.

MUSIC

43. Have It Both Ways

Can’t decide – or can’t agree – on whether to have live entertainment or a DJ? Split the difference and hire musicians for cocktails and a disc jockey for dancing.

44. Build the Best Band

If you’re hiring a cover band, a good one requires a male and a female vocalist, a guitar, bass, keyboard, trumpet or sax, and drums to make the most versatile combination.

45. Offer Guidelines

If there are specific songs you must hear, make a list beforehand for your band or DJ. Are there tunes you absolutely don’t want? Draw up a do-not-play list as well.

46. Keep Mealtime Tunes Soft

If your entertainers aren’t taking a break during this time, they should be considerate of diners by turning down the mike and avoiding any energetic selections.

47. Ask What They’ll Wear

Most DJs or bands will don tuxedos or suits, but it’s best to clarify attire with them to avoid surprises. For a casual event, such as a beach reception, you may want them in something less formal.

48. Depart in Style

Ask your site manager beforehand whether rice, rose petals, sparklers, and the like are allowed. When it comes time to leave, have someone round up guests and pass out props, then say a heartfelt goodbye.

              

49. Show Appreciation

Make sure you’ve designated someone, such as the best man, to distribute gratuity envelopes you’ve prepared at party’s end. You’ll need to tip all service providers, including the catering and reception staff (unless gratuity is added to the total bill), cleanup crew, and limousine drivers.