Get ready, this is a big one. A real dream come true. Everyone said it was a bad idea. Caitlin, Barry, all of them. Oh well. You ready?
Cinema Cisco. BOOM. It finally happened. The first moderately successful movie night in the Pipeline. And it was the Weather Wizard’s first night too! Damn, I’m good. So, I’ve tried to rig up monitors in the cells like a million times but The Mist kept trying to kill me and Prism kept trying to whammy me. I mean, cut a guy some slack. I’m trying to give ya some entertainment, people. This time, though, I recruited a really cool, teleporting lady. Maybe you know her? Peek-a-boo (Shawna!) - I promised she could have peanut M&Ms in her popcorn if she would be my lookout while I set the scarier ones screens up. Btw, ew. M&Ms? I’m all about that sour patch and popcorn mix.
The screens were up, the metas all in their respective cells, it was almost perfect until Mr. Handsome Weather Wizard started boohooing my movie choice. Who doesn’t dig The Goonies? Chunk, Data, Mama Fratelli, Sloth!!! Murderous meta-humans. WW riled em up, screaming for a vote. I think he’s just bummed Barry caught him in what, like, three minutes? Not impressed.
But I still asked what Shawna would vote for. “Not the Goonies,” she said. My heart is broken. She went on that the movie doesn’t stand the test of time. I almost snagged back her popcorn. I’m out of love and… I’m back in. Yeah, I’m easy. All she had to do was offer me a seat and a bite of her popcorn concoction. Honestly, it wasn’t that bad.
I paused the movie with a plan. I didn’t want the movie night to be another disaster and the Weather Wizard wouldn’t shut his pie hole so I’d let them think they were choosing the film. All I had to do was stack the odds in The Goonies favor. They could choose between Goonies, Mean Girls, the Godfather part III, and Pearl Harbor. Easy, right? Nope. They chose Mean Girls. Literally, every single one of them. Prism drew an explanation point as well as a very detailed rendering of me holding a piece of the tiara from the ending. I left him for like two seconds, tops! Oh, and I’m definitely hanging this in my living room. I look powerful.
I popped the movie in, prepared for more mayhem and hijinks from the metas, but instead a magical thing happened – everyone was silent, engaged, and dare I say happy. The best part was after Mean Girls, when I did my usual rounds, no one tried to murder me. Now I just gotta figure out the next movie choice. Was Tina Fey the key to their viewing pleasure or was it Lindsay Lohan? Should I try to stream that Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt show or whack them with a double dose of Lohan in the Parent Trap? Either way, Cinema Cisco will return.
Till next time, remember -