weasleys wheezes

  • [training their new employee at WWW]
  • George: Now, normally, your boss will tell you that the customer is always right.
  • Fred: This is a false notion.
  • George: In fact, the customer is usually a moron.
  • Fred: And an asshole.

You know how in Grey’s Anatomy Meredith’s house is the safe space for everyone where strays are always welcome and all of them have lived there at one point or another? 

I think Weasley’s Wizarding Wheezes was like this for the HP crew after the war.

Lee had been so involved with Potterwatch. It kept him distracted and busy, but after it became unnecessary, he just kinda crashed. And Fred may not have been family but Lee still lost a best friend and was worried for his other best friend. So Lee was the first one to move in above WWW and help George run it. Angelina, Alicia, and Katie move in shortly after. They really don’t even think about it. They’ve been so hard and so tough for so long now that they need a place to learn how to laugh again. And doing it together seems only natural after all their years of Quidditch together.

Ron didn’t even know how to function after the war. When he finally started dealing with things, he moved in with Lee and Angelina and Alicia and Katie and George and also helped out with WWW. Ron always thought WWW was genius, especially in the midst of the brewing war, and both Hermione and Harry recognized this and pushed him to go be involved with it.

Katie manages a job at St. Mungo’s after a few months and finds a nice little flat closer to the hospital that’s easier to be on call from. She doesn’t want to go alone, so Alicia goes with her. Angelina and Lee and Ron stay with George and WWW.

Ginny had to go back to school. She really only made it through the year because she knew Molly would never let her quit and it wasn’t a fight she had the energy for. But as soon as she graduated, off to WWW she went to live and work with George, Lee, Angelina, and Ron.

Ginny and Neville talk a lot, so Ginny sees how lost Neville is and how much he needs a break after leading DA and the war and being unhappy with the job he took so he would have some money to save up for his own place. So Ginny pesters Neville into moving in with them and working at WWW for a while.

At this point, the quarters are getting pretty tight - nothing new for George, Ron, or Ginny, but Lee’s an only child and he’s a bit of an introvert. And being away from a radio mic for so long has made Lee realize how much he truly just enjoyed the radio thing, so he moves out to pursue this, with an open invitation to return at any time. Angelina silently follows shortly after that, saying she needed space to heal but now she needs space to think. Wherever she goes, none of them are sure, but George suspects it’s either her family or Alicia and Katie.

Ginny also talks to Luna quite a bit and damn is Luna really messed up right now and feeling quite left out but doesn’t have the confidence to be able to ask to move in to WWW with everyone and feels a bit bad about leaving her father but he’s still kinda suffocating her because he’s messed up, too. Ginny floos to Luna and basically just drags her to WWW to live with everyone and tells Xenophilius that Andromeda might have room at him for her house and she could possibly use some more help with little Teddy.

So now George, Ron, Ginny, Neville, and Luna are all living cozy in WWW and helping out at the store. And this is how they stay for a while.

Until Neville accidentally ends up buying a house he can’t afford by himself (he’d thought he was over this “why me” thing) but it turns out to be a good thing because Ginny just got an official offer for Quidditch and she and Luna are happy to help out with rent for a while, so the three of them move out. George is sad to see them go, but tbh, Luna’s not really great in the shop, so it’s kind of a relief that she’ll be coping in other ways.

But just like that it’s George and Ron alone and it seems too lonely compared to how it’s always been. Not to worry, though, because Harry and Hermione have been living together, but they’re both really lonely without Ron and - hey - there’s finally room for them at WWW. After an argument over whether or not they need to ask, they end up apparating outside the shop one night and throwing rocks at the upstairs windows, giggling together and wondering if wixen ever do this or if it’s just a muggle thing. They’re invited right in and WWW is all nice and cozy again with George, Ron, Hermione, and Harry living there.

Then they go to the Burrow one night for the family dinner that Molly insists on having once a month, and Percy is there and clearly wasn’t telling his siblings the full truth of how he feels because he looks downright terrible. So George, Ron, Hermione, and Harry go back to WWW that night with a new roommate. 

Hermione’s never been too into WWW, although she certainly respects all the innovation and hard work George manages for it, so she’s ready to leave before both her boys are. But neither Ron nor Harry are ready to leave yet, so Hermione gets that job at the Ministry that she prefers over WWW but doesn’t move out just yet.

Until one night Dean and a crying (”I’m not crying!”) Seamus show up to the shop. Being separated throughout the war and spending every night thinking that Dean was dead made Seamus tired of being in the closet. He and Dean just wanted to be together. But Seamus’ folks don’t really take it that well and neither him or Dean are doing that well and they don’t know where else to go. So they spend the night at WWW, which is really cramped, but none of them even think to complain.

In the next few days, a lot happens. Luna’s decided to travel the world a bit. Look for all those creatures she wants to see. Neville’s thinking of going with her. Harry and Ginny have been having Serious Talks trying to work out how they feel and what they want. Hermione’s been ready to move out, and Ron finally feels like he can breathe without breaking in half. And there isn’t room for all of them at WWW. So Neville and Luna set off, and Harry, Hermione, and Ron move in with Ginny. And George, Percy, Dean, and Seamus have a little more room to move around WWW.

But there’s only so much of Percy running the shop too much his way that George can take, and soon George has got Percy convinced that yes he can too do a fine job working at the Ministry. And that’s the push that Percy needed to get back on track with his life plans, which include not living at WWW forever.

And George doesn’t really know how it happened - he wasn’t really even friends with some of the people who’ve passed through - but his place becomes the Go To Place. The Place of Comfort. The Place That Welcomes. And it just… doesn’t really stop because George never minds and he never says no. Through the years, pretty much everyone lives there at one point. 

Charlie lives there at one point when he happens to be in the middle of jobs. Bill and Fleur move in for a bit while she’s pregnant because things are really busy and they need another person to be there to help out. Bill and Lavender had been hanging out because they’re the closest support each has for lycanthropy. Once Bill and Fleur move out after the baby is born, Lavender ends up with George because she definitely doesn’t want to put the baby at risk. Which leads to Parvati coming to WWW and they live with George until Parvati convinces Lavender they can handle this and they move out together. Parvati must have mentioned something to Padma about George seeming like he didn’t want to live alone, so suddenly he’s got Padma and Cho and Marietta living with him for a while. Oliver lives there sometimes during the offseason of Quidditch when he decides he doesn’t like his house and doesn’t plan far enough ahead to rent a new place before leaving the old. Lee and Katie move back in for a while in between other roommates, partially for their sake and partially for George’s. Angelina pops by sometimes but usually only stays a night or two. Most of his niblings even live there - for a lot of them, WWW is their first job. When Molly dies, Arthur moves in and stays with George until he, too dies.

And George ends up just really never living alone? But he’s really okay with it because he’s not sure he was ever meant to be alone, anyway.

  • George: In the Battle of Hogwarts, I lost my beloved twin, Fred.
  • Fred (from the other room): STOP TELLING PEOPLE I'M DEAD.
  • George: Sometimes I can still hear his voice.
Punched in the face

“You’re home early.” Ron commented surprised when Hermione entered the small flat above the jokes shop. Fred and George had moved out of there about a year ago when their first kids had been born, because really the place was barely big enough to fit two, left alone two couples with babies.

“I am.” Hermione sighed as she hung her coat over a nearby chair. Ron gasped when she turned around, revealing a shallow but bright red cut over her cheek.

“What did you-”

“I got suspended.” Ron’s eyes grew so wide they nearly fell out of his head. His Hermione? Suspended? Sure, back in their Hogwarts days it might have been plausible, but with Harry buried in auror duties and Ron working at WWW she had no one left to drag her into trouble. Not that she was a goodie two shoes, far from it even, but without him and Harry there to ruin her plans no one would ever discover her schemes. They were much too clever for that.

“How did that happen?”

“Cormac McLaggen.” Hermione answered, suddenly grinning so wide that the cut on her cheek started bleeding again. “Let’s just say we had a little fun.”

Ron’s stomach made a backflip and then dropped through the floor. McLaggen had a wide network in the ministry, and Hermione had been trying to befriend him for ages now because of it. She always complained about how awful he was.

First that had reassured him, but now that Harry was shagging Malfoy, who had been fighting and complaining about each other since forever, Ron suddenly wasn’t so sure about the nature of this friendship anymore.

“Fun you say?” He asked, trying to hide his sudden change in mood by turning around and focussing on the pots and pans on the stove again. He wasn’t even making her favorite meal, but one of his own creations because he thought he’d earned that much after an exhausting day in the store. That had probably been a mistake.

Maybe he should order takeaway while he still could. Fuck, why was he so terrible at this dating stuff? Why could he, after five years of being together, still not figure out how to act in situations like these?

Maybe Hermione was too much of a woman for him. Merlin knew people told him that often enough, and he honestly couldn’t convince himself anymore that it wasn’t true. She was too complex for him, a man who hadn’t even been able to stay in the auror program for more than a year.

“Yes, most fun I’ve had in ages.” Hermione chuckled. See, Ron thought bitterly, I can’t even let her have some fun, and I work in a bloody joke shop.

“What did you do?” He took some pride in the casual tone of his question, but that wasn’t nearly enough to improve his mood. Being a good liar wasn’t exactly a character trait people wanted to see in their partners.

“I punched him in the face when he tried to make advances on me.” Hermione hopped onto the kitchen counter next to the stove and kicked off her shoes. “He said you were a useless tool with no talent, and that I deserve better, which is bullshit because you’re amazing and things don’t get better than Ronald Weasley.”

Okay. That was definitely not something Hermione had ever told him before. It was also something that took him by surprise so much that he stopped stirring his pan in favour of staring blankly at the wall in front of him.

Hermione nudged him with her foot, and when that provoked nothing she hopped down and kissed his shoulder, the highest place she could reach since he was quite a bit taller than her.

“You think so?” He asked before he could stop himself. He cursed himself for letting his voice sounding so small. So much for being a convincing liar.

“Ronald Weasley,” Hermione said sternly. “Of course I don’t think so.” Ron’s stomach disappeared for the second time that late afternoon. “I bloody well know so.”

Ron, finally capable of tearing his eyes away from the wall, turned his head to look at her. Her brown eyes looked back at him with a fierceness that kind of scared him. But it was a good scared.

And maybe it wasn’t even her he was scared of, but the sheer amount of love he felt for her. Surely it shouldn’t be possible to care that much about one person. Especially not for someone with the emotional range of a teaspoon.

“I love you.” He grinned as he lifted her up and kissed her. It wasn’t a deep kiss, because he couldn’t hold back his laughter anymore which made kissing a bit of a challenge. Relief always made him incredibly giddy.

“What’s funny?” Hermione asked him suspiciously, but she said it with a smile on her face. After all how could she not smile when the man she loved looked so bloody cute while he laughed?

Emotional range of a teaspoon.” Ron replied. Hermione snorted and pressed her forehead against his chest before they both lost themselves in laughter and each other.

“I love you too, Ron.” Hermione said breathlessly, rubbing her stomach which was sore from laughing too much. “I changed my mind, this is the most fun I’ve had in ages.”

That put a smile brighter than any sun on Ron’s face. Others might think she’s too much of a woman for me. He thought with no trace of bitterness anywhere. But I’m starting to think I know a hell of a lot better than they do.


This is the first romione I ever wrote so I hope it’s not shite

rose-draconum  asked:

Ace Fred Weasley II would get one of those prank cans that when opened would create an explosion of purple and black glitter with an Ace Pride flag; he sets it off at Weasley Family Dinner to come out. Afterwards, his father is so supportive that he creates a new line of Pride gear at WWW -R

Fred II has been wanting to come out as asexual for a while now. But he wants to come out to his parent’s first, and he wants to do it in just the right way. Inspiration is slow to strike, but it’s okay. Fred’s good at waiting. He’s the kind of kid who can be the life of the party when he wants, but otherwise can go pretty unnoticed - useful for collecting all types of information that he absolutely never uses to blackmail his cousins into doing all sorts of hilarious things. Point being, Fred is patient. He wants to come out. Wants to share this with his parents. But he can wait until the time is right.

Fred really went into the muggle store on a dare. Turns out that the prank shop was a goldmine. Fred II walks out with an exploding prank can and a huge grin on his face. Dinner tonight is going to be the best. With a little creative spellwork, he transforms the green shamrocks into purple and black glitter and the snake into an ace pride flag. He’s finally ready.

~

The flag hovers over the table and in the brief moment of silence - a rare occurrence indeed - Fred II wonders if this was really the best way to come out. Or maybe he should have come out to just his parents. He’d just gotten so excited and wanted to share it with everyone at once -

“I KNEW it!” Rose roars, standing triumphantly up. “Pay up, suckers!” And suddenly money is being quickly exchanged between all of his cousins.

“I don’t -” Uncle Ron is saying before Hermione cuts him off, reminding him that it’s the ace pride flag.

Uncle Harry, who’s sitting the closest to him, slaps his back in a friendly manner. “Welcome to the Club,” he says. “Charlie’s president, so we don’t meet much since he’s away all the time,” he smiles and winks. Fred rolls his eyes.

Grandma is leaning over past grandpa and reaching towards his wrist. “Oh, really, now, Fred. You know I love you,” she says before turning to Teddy to give him a pointed glare. “What exactly was wrong with just coming out? Now you’ve turned it into a competition between everyone, nearly giving me a heart attack every time someone comes out,” she admonishes. 

Teddy simply winks and gives him a thumbs up, a gesture James copies.

“Thanks, Fred!” Rose grins, stuffing her pockets full of money, clearly having taken the largest share of the pot from their cousins. “Oh, and congrats on finally coming out.”

“She means thanks for trusting us enough to come out to us,” Hugo corrects, starting a small bickering match between his sister and himself.

And then Fred is being enveloped in a ginormous hug from his father, who doesn’t bother to say anything.

Mum quirks an eyebrow at him once his dad has quit hugging him, a huge grin still on his face. “Is that all spelled? You know we’re going to talk about that later. But I’m proud of you for telling us,” she says with the barest hint of a smile.

~

Two weeks after Fred II comes out, and dad drags him to the shop.

“Dad, I’ve seen the new puking pastilles. The old ones were better.”

“Pish posh,” dad says cheerily. “Besides, this is something new. Just wait here.”

Fred rolls his eyes but stands obediently where his dad asks, near the front of the shop.

“Ta-da!” dad shouts, while at the same time the shop briefly flashes purple, black, and gray, before the color goes right again. Streamers burst down from the ceiling and mini-pride-colored-fireworks go off (one in the shape of a dragon, which Fred files away to absolutely get one of those), and then several new stands pop up in the store. Fred recognizes various pride colors amongst the stands: aro, ace, bi, gay, lesbian, pan, genderqueer, trans, and nonbinary. Others he doesn’t recognize but has no doubts they’re pride-related.

Dad pops down from upstairs right next to Fred, apparating even though he only had to go down a few stairs. “Look,” he says, dragging Fred along the stands. “Candy that lets you breathe a burst of fire in the pride color you buy, some of those cool exploding cans you found that burst into pride flags, plain hats that turn the wearer into your pride colors of choice, pins to show your pride that disappear after a day, lollipops that make the person eating them spout out random messages of support and understanding, and - okay, yes, there are puking pastilles here, but they give you multi-colored pride puke. Not very useful for getting out of class but good for grossing your friends out. It’s not everything, either, just my start! I’m going to offer a permanent pride line here,” dad presents, a huge grin on his face.

Fred lets everything sink in slowly. He feels the grin slowly spreading across his face. “Oh. Dad. I have so many ideas,” he says.

~Hufflepuff Mod

Dudley calling Harry up out of the blue in a panic when his 2 year old starts showing signs of magic. Like how does he stop her from sneezing and setting the curtains on fire? 

Dudley and his family visiting with the Potters at Christmas and him finally agreeing to let little Petunia try out James new toy broomstick that they end up crashing into him and knocking him over.

Dudley telling his parents that he’s sending their granddaughter to Hogwarts with Harry’s son Albus and that if they ever call her or Harry’s family freaks, he will never speak to them again.

Harry explaining how Wizarding currency works to Dudley when he tries to buy his daughters wand with a debit card.

Harry showing Dudley and his wife around Diagon Alley, keeping them far away from Weasleys Wizard Wheezes (he still has nightmares about that Ton-Tongue Toffee incident).

Dudley congratulating his daughter on making it into Hufflepuff, whatever the hell that means. 

Dudley not quite understanding what it means to be made Quidditch Captain, but being immensely proud anyways. 

Dudley learning to accept what he doesn’t understand and grow past his upbringing.

Love Potion

Request: @bear105 Can you do an imagine where Draco gets a love potion from the Weasley Twins joke shop hoping to use it on the reader please 😁

YAASS!! I literally screamed when I saw this request lmao (Y/F/N means Your Friend’s Name)

Originally posted by hpfansblog

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3

Lupin Foundation awarded IWOM for distributing free wolfsbane potion to needy werewolves

The Lupin Foundation

The Lupin Foundation is a registered charity that aims to improve the lives of werewolves in the UK. Founded in 2001 by Ronald Weasley and Fleur Delacour, the charity honours the memory of Remus Lupin (O.M. First Class), who fought and died in the Battle of Hogwarts during the Second Wizarding War.

The Foundation’s headquarters are located at the foot of Ben Lomond, and a nearby glen serves as a werewolf sanctuary for new or injured werewolves. In addition to providing sanctuary to at-risk werewolves, the Foundation also provides financial and medical aid, as well as scholarships for young witches and wizards who are werewolves themselves or related to one. 

Co-sponsored by Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes and St. Mungo’s Hospital, the Lupin Foundation has worked hard to remove the stigma of lycanthropy in wizarding society. In order to do so, it focuses on providing the social and healthcare structures necessary for the lasting and complete integration of werewolves into wizardkind.

Last year, the charity was recognised for its work when it was awarded the International Wizarding Order of Merit. It won the award for its distribution of free wolfsbane potion to needy werewolves. Wolfsbane potion is notoriously expensive and difficult to make, meaning that before the Lupin Foundation started making it for free at their sanctuary, many werewolves succumbed to the effects of their condition at every full moon with no means of relief. 

The lack of access to essential healthcare has contributed to the poor mental health of werewolves in the UK. However, due to the tireless efforts of the Lupin Foundation and its partners, statistics have significantly improved.

More 21st century wizarding here

This is for the anon who made a wonderful request for ‘the Lupin Foundation’. What a great request!

8

“We won’t be seeing you,” Fred told Professor Umbridge, swinging his leg over his broomstick.

“Yeah, don’t bother to keep in touch,” said George, mounting his own.

Fred looked around at the assembled students, and at the silent, watchful crowd. “If anyone fancies buying a Portable Swamp, as demonstrated upstairs, come to number ninety-three, Diagon Alley — Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes,” he said in a loud voice, “Our new premises!”

“Special discounts to Hogwarts students who swear they’re going to use our products to get rid of this old bat,” added George, pointing at Professor Umbridge.

2

For anon…Fred survived the Battle of Hogwarts as requested (yay!) and the reader is also female as requested. Enjoy!

The door chimed, alerting the twin owners to another presence. Given the hour, the shop was quite filled with rambunctious witches and wizards. Fred glanced over to the door to see a witch around his age. Her eyes were gazing around in awe and curiosity. Fred couldn’t help but find her fascinating.

It seemed she had a few friends with her who were immediately off to roam the store. George tapped his brother on the chest.

“Looks like we’ve got another one, eh?” he teased.
“Looks like,” Fred replied while keeping his gaze on her.

George’s eye glinted with knowing and mischief. Without so much as indicating that he had caught on, George started walking toward the newest customer. Fred followed as he usually did. George leaned against the banister as he reached where the witch was currently gazing.

“Skiving Snackboxes,” George started, “A classic choice.”
Y/N glanced up to see the brothers. She beamed. “Umbridge-itis is quite contagious you know. I’ve got to be prepared to handle it.”
Fred smirked. “Who could blame you?”

She smiled, holding his gaze. George cleared his throat before extending a hand.

“I’m George and this is Fred; we’re the owners.”
She shook his hand. “Y/N; a potential customer.”
Fred chuckled and arched a brow. “Potential? I thought we had you sold.”
“And be predictable?” she teased, “I don’t think so.”

She glanced over her shoulder as she heard her friends calling to her. She smirked and told them to hold on. She turned back to the twins, her gaze setting on Fred.

“It was pleasure meeting you two. I hope to see you around.”
He smirked. “The pleasure was ours.”

Y/N hurried over to her friends, Fred’s gaze following her. Chuckling, George tapped his twin again.

“Oi Freddie, I think you grabbed a snack box by accident.”
He knit his brows. “Eh?”
“You’re lovesick.”

George laughed as Fred scrunched his nose attempting to laugh it off. He had no idea how hard he just fell for her. Only time would show him.

Perma-tags: @dontbeamenacetotheforce @jumperswellies @ttelesilla @caitsymichelle13 @myplaceofthingsilove @holywinchesterness
Semi-tags: @astrangeevent02

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