we dont go there at night

I was talking about it on my twitter the other night but the reply on this post helps put into perspective of the point I was trying to get at, so i’m going to reiterate it here now that I have a clearer understanding of what i was trying to say:

I know a lot of SP fans have been anticipating when we get to see stuff like Craig and Tweek kiss or have more expressions of physical affection for each other to validate to the audience their love for each other, and don’t get me wrong, while I’d be more than thrilled to see that in canon too, I was thinking about the fact that I personally don’t feel a need to see it nor do I expect it?
I’m not watching South Park episodes banking on “when are they going to have an episode where Craig and Tweek kiss” and I don’t really get torn up when I see them not sitting next to each other in the background of new episodes and so forth, and think there’s a couple of reasons for that. 

One being I feel like it doesn’t really match up with the storytelling style of the show. The way South Park tends to portray relationships between the kids was never really built on seeing tons of physical puppy love affection from them unless there is a specific reason to (In the case with Heidi and Cartman it was to contrast how out of character that feels for him, and that relationship went to shit pretty fast anyways), and honestly, the show has already given us way more than I would have ever dreamed possible for a ship like Creek to get. I mean, they get a whole episode about learning how to communicate and a huge focus in the new game. 

Then the other reason is because Craig and Tweek’s relationship is written so explicitly in showing that they are together, you don’t really, need to see that to validate the fact that they love and care about each other? I think a lot of fans are waiting for them to have some magical kiss or whatever to prove they are in love, but what’s interesting about the show is like the comment in the post I linked above stated, Matt and Trey did completely skip the puppy love part of a relationship in writing Craig and Tweek and jump right into the parts that really show how much you love someone in the more subtle but powerful ways. Not only that but it seems that they use idea of people wanting to see the two be affectionate as the specific thing they parody, via the yaoi art, etc. which matches up because most of the fans create their own content to indulge in that aspect of their relationship. 

Due to that I feel like a lot of that side of their relationship is going to be kept framed in that yaoi art parody context. HOWEVER, that’s not necessarily a bad thing because if you are someone who isn’t familiar with this aspect of a relationship, it might go over one’s head, but the way Craig and Tweek’s relationship is written is with a huge focus on healthy communication and learning to work through problems and just being there for each other and supporting each other. This is all the stuff that comes into a relationship that will literally make or break it once you get past all the initial hand holding and kissing and cuddling fun part of it. It’s the part that requires all the actual work and really says how much do you care about this person and whether or not you are compatible in a healthy way. People are individuals and there will always be times where you will argue or fight with someone no matter how much you love them, and what matters is how those issues are handled.

The fact that this is the part of the relationship between Craig and Tweek that is focused on, especially from the standpoint of them actually working through their differences and wanting to be together says 1000x more about how much they really love each other than any on-screen kiss will. You don’t need to see them physically show how much they love each other because it’s literally all right there in how they interact with each other by creating a solid foundation that will allow them to stay together as a couple in the long run.

I find it super interesting that this is what the focus became for their canon relationship because not only is it just validating how GOOD of a relationship Craig and Tweek have, it’s also saying that people will always argue and have disagreements no matter what and this is what a real relationship takes, this is how two people learn to work through their differences to be together in a healthy way. It’s teaching a beautifully mature lesson about loving someone else (intentional or not, I’m at a loss) and it is a million times more validating in why I find Craig and Tweek’s relationship so satisfying as is and just a WONDERFUL portrayal of relationships on a bigger scale, not just in giving LGBT representation. 

Not to compare to SU, but I find Craig and Tweek’s relationship to be more powerful for relationship representation as a whole than say even Ruby and Sapphire’s relationship because even though they DO have on-screen kissing and cuddling, you don’t really get to see the characters exist outside of each other or work through relationship issues in a way that really shows who they are as individuals and what it is that builds their love for each other because they weren’t written to exist outside of each other. Ruby and Sapphire were written to be a relationship and in a way that flattens them as characters and makes it hard to see them beyond that. Meanwhile, Craig and Tweek were already solidly defined characters on their own so you know that they could easily break up and go off on their own narrative-wise because that’s how they were before, so the fact that they do work through their issues and stay together is so much more powerful and teaches so much more. 

The TLDR point: Craig and Tweek have such a wonderfully written relationship that you don’t really need to see puppy love or kissing from them to prove what is obviously already there, and that’s why I’m perfectly content just indulging in that part of their relationship in fandom instead of seeing it in canon because canon already gave us the most important and best part of a good relationship.  

IM STILL NOT OVER WHAT JUST HAPPENED TO ME! THIS ALBUM IS GOING TO SLAY OUR FACES OFF. ITS BETTER THAN I EVER DREAMED AND SHE IS SO PROUD OF EVERY SINGLE TRACK AND SHE WAS BEAMING AND SHE KNEW MY FREAKING NAME AND HUGGED ME SO TIGHT I MELTED AND I CANT BELIEVE SHE LOVES ME BUT ILL FOREVER HAVE HER BACK! ❤️❤️❤️ I DONT KNOW THE WORDS TO DESCRIBE THIS FEELING. TAYLOR CAN YOU PLEASE WRITE A SONG THAT CAPTURES HOW WE ALL FELT LAST NIGHT? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!

Date Ideas
  • Jonah: Bowling date. You go on a late night adventure to the bowling alley and laugh all night.
  • Zach: Bike ride date. You go to the beach and rent out a bike to cruise around the pier.
  • Corbyn: Arcade date. You guys lose track of time playing every single game there is.
  • Daniel: Karaoke date. You take turns singing cute Disney songs in the middle of an empty restaurant.
  • Jack: Music Concert Date. You guys dance all night feeling the cool breeze hit your face.

i love comforting nihilism. who cares, we’re all gonna die. eat that cake. buy that eyeshadow. be nice to people. you dont owe the world shit. the stars dont care about what we do. give anyway because why spend your eighty years on this rock miserable and making other people miserable. the sun is going to blow up and we’re all gonna die someday. make the most of what time you do have. use the fine china for taco night and microwave lunch. smell the flowers. tell a stranger they are beautiful. 

you know what i dont understand?? 

why dont adults have sleepovers or spoon with their platonic friends or hang out until sunrise?? when are you supposed to stop putting your head in a random friends lap and telling them to play with your hair?? when do we stop going to the grocery store together and spending the night at each others places and crowding as many of our friends onto our beds as possible so we can snuggle and gossip?

i dont want a house in the suburbs i want an place in the city with a bunch of my pals and dogs where we hang out in the kitchen and dogpile on the couch if one of us is sad

3

╰◈╮PROTECTIVE SENTENCE STARTERS.

“ Where do you think you’re going? “
” I really don’t want you hanging out with them. “
” Where have you been all night? “
” I think it would be a good idea to get tracking devices. “
” I’m putting cameras up all around the house for security. “
” Don’t leave the house with the pocket knife or mase. “
” I think we should get some better security. “
” I’m going to get us a dog for security purposes. “
” You really need to find better friends. “
” I don’t think your friends are really your friends. “
” Okay, call me as soon as you get there. “
” Don’t you dare text and drive! “
” Please don’t text while you’re driving. “
” Is that outfit really appropriate? “
” I think we should go shopping for your new clothes. “
” He careful when you go to walk down the steps. “
” Always knock before going inside. “
” You have the emergency contact list right? “
” Are you skipping school again? You know I’m going to give you a talk. “
” I don’t want you going anywhere with those people. “
” You aren’t aloud out past ten, you know that. “
” Hey, I don’t make the rules around here. “
” You should probably stay home with us tonight. “
” Why don’t you stay home and have some family time? “
” You missed family game night for that? “
” That’s the second time tonight you missed family game night? “
” I can’t believe you’re dissing us for your fake friends. “
” Hey, why don’t you come out and socialize with your family? “
” Look, I’m just worried about you is all. “
” You don’t want me to take you to school? “
” Where are you going? I can give you a ride. “
” You’re not allowed to go out without one of your brothers or sisters. “
” You can go as long as your brother/sister can go too. “
” I put double locks on all the windows in the house. “
” I think we should move to a nicer neighborhood. “
” I do not want you out driving at night. “
” I dont want anyone out while the storm is coming. “
” Remember to stay indoors when the storm comes. “
” We need to go over our fire escape route again. “
” You aren’t supposed to shower during storms, dear. “
” Are you feeling okay? Want me to draw you a bath? “
” You’re sick, just stay home today and rest. “
” I don’t want you to be home alone. “
” Would you like to come to work with me today? “
” Why haven’t you answered any of my calls or texts? “
” You do not ignore me like that again. “
” I can’t believe I’ve been up all night worried sick! “
” No, you could get alcohol poison. “
” I don’t want anyone drinking in this house. “
” What happened to all that money I gave you? “

#YesAllWomen because I shouldnt have to hold my keys in fear & check over my shoulder every few seconds when i walk at night
because the odds of being attacked by a shark is 1 in 3,748,067, while a woman’s odds of being raped are 1 in 6…
because when Malala Yousafzai was 14 she was shot in the head for trying to go to school.
because we always have to watch our drink when we go to bars and parties.
because guys say “buT NOT ALL MEN!!!” but all women are bad drivers and all women are moody and all women are emotional and all women get to be painted w the same brush but dont u dare generalise men thats unfair!!!!
NO ONE actually thinks “all men”.
just TOO MANY men.
just ENOUGH men to be afraid.
just ENOUGH men that ALL women have experienced it.
just ENOUGH to make it a social problem and not a personal one.
BECAUSE if she is “too young” to be wearing “those clothes”, she’s also too young for you to be sexualizing her body for wearing them ???
because we NEED to be the generation who will teach our sons to act respectfully instead of teaching our daughters to beware.
Because i care about the problems of men?? you’re allowed to wear pink. you’re allowed to hate sports. you’re allowed to cry. you’re allowed to be small and scrawny. you’re allowed to be confused as hell when your car breaks down. you’re allowed to wear makeup. you’re allowed to express your feelings. you’re allowed to be afraid of spiders. you’re allowed to love romantic comedies. you’re allowed to hate the gym. you’re allowed to play with barbies. you’re allowed to not have abs.
Because it is not just about me, bc it is not just about anger, bc it is not just a JOKE, bc it is not just about the fact that gay men are “fags” but lesbians are “hot,” bc it is not just about pics of thin white girls being the only google image results for “beautiful women”, bc it is not just about what she was wearing or how many times she said yes before she changed her answer to no.
And because.. jesus chRIST why is equality so hard to grasp!!! like
I AM A PERSON
YOU ARE A PERSON
WE ARE EQUAL
FIN.

https://instagram.com/p/BRYeQ9pAOrJ/
Updated masterlist #8

It’s that time again! 

All smut is indicated
(*) over 50 notes
(**) over 100 notes
(***) over 150 notes
(!) over 200 notes
(!!) over 300 notes
(!!!) over 500 notes

(^) over 1000 notes
(^^) over 2000 notes

(^^^) over 27,000 notes

Text AU

You confuse them with Meghan Trainor lyrics (!!)
You loose something stupid (!!)
Messaging the wrong boy (!!)
You love superheroes (!!)
Food mishaps with the baby (!)
you play hide and seek (!)
They think you are ignoring them (!)
Kitchen mishaps (!)
you buy a dog (!)
Harry Potter (***)
Kittens (***)
you give him a heart attack (***)
You have a bad day at school (***)
Calum finding out that you had a seizure but you left your phone at home (***)
You tell him you’re pregnant (***)
1st december (***)
Michael’s black hair (**)
supernatural 5sos part 2.5 (the other parts are found in preferences) (**)

Non smutty visuals

Imagine #1 (Calum) (**)
Imagine #2 (Michael) (*)
Imagine #3 (Ashton) (*)
Imagine #4 (Luke) (*)
Imagine #5 (Calum) (*)
Imagine #6 (Luke) (*)
Imagine #7 (Ashton) (**)
Imagine #8 (Michael) (*)
Imagine #9 (Calum) (**)

Preferences

you make him cum his pants *smut*  (!!!)
Bus Bunk mishaps  (!!)
You get in a car crash and lose your memory (!)
You get in a car crash and lose your memory part 2 (***)
He thinks you are cheating on him (!)
He thinks you are cheating on him part 2 (!)
Supernatural 5sos (!)
Supernatural 5sos part 2  (***)
Supernatural 5sos part 3  (**)
supernatural 5sos part 4  (**)
supernatural 5sos part 5 (**)
supernatural 5sos part 6 (*)
supernatural 5sos part 7 (*)
supernatural 5sos part 8 (*)
supernatural 5sos part 9 (*)
Pap problems  (!)
Shutting him out (***)
You’re his celebrity crush (***)
Camp half blood AU   (**)
Camp Half-blood part 2 (**)
Camp half blood part 3
having an argument/fight (**)
having a argument/fight part 2 (***)
you like him but to him you are just friends (**)
Part 2 (**)
Love me like you do *song preference*   (**)
Finding out you are pregnant (*)
He’s your best friend but you have a crush on someone else (*)
he is your best friend but you have a crush on someone else part 2 (*)
insecurities (*)
he insults you and the boys defend you (*)
He takes care of you when you are sick
When you’re gone Avril lavigne *song preference* (*)
Natalia Kills-Problem (*)
You ruin me by the veronicas*song preference*

Imagines

Ashton
Skype sex with visual  *smut* (***)
My wallflower (Nerd) (*)
My Wallflower Part 2
Luke Vs Ashton (*)
Personal Ashton imagine for wrecking-ball-love
Michael Vs Ashton
Calum Vs Ashton
Golden Compass AU
Ipod shuffle - Still into you
Michael
He walks in on your masturbating *smut*  (***)
He walks in on your masturbating part 2 *smut*  (**)
Skype sex with visual *smut* (**)  
Michael smut, overprotective older brother Luke (**)
Single parent (*)
Michael imagine where you’ve been dating a long time but Harry has a thing for you (*)
Secret boyfriend Michael (*)
Michael Imagine Welcome home *smut* (*)
Michael Vs Ashton
You’re just not punk rock enough for me (*)
Bad boy Michael (*)
He’s not that bad (*)
He’s not that bad part 2 (*)
He’s not that bad part 3  *smut* (**)
He’s not that bad part 4
No Sleep of the Wicked
Gastroparesis
No Sleep of the Wicked
Parenthood is hard
Appendicitis
Trying to study
Even though I know you’re lying, I still almost believe you *requested*
You saved me from myself
Luke
I like you, not him. *smut* (***)
Neighbour (*)
Luke imagine Dont you forget me (*)
Luke Imagine Panic attack (*)
Skype sex with visual *smut* (*)
Luke imagine shower sex  *smut* (*)
Married at first sight (*)
The Hunger Games (*)
Backstage fun *smut*
Luke song imagine “Our July in the Rain” by He is We
Luke Imagine Not so secret relationship
Luke Imagine you like him but he doesn’t feel the same
Luke has a headache
Badly written imagine
Calum
Silent treatment from him (**)
Happy New Year (**)
Mad at Calum (*)
Secret love affair with Calum (*)
Jock meets Nerd (**)
personal Calum visual imagine for hoodswhisper *smut*
Calum imagine He has a headache
Calum Vs Ashton

Fanfictions
Bad Boy werewolf michael (!!)
Fate is not our friend Ashton werewolf
Mr Nerd is my soul mate Luke  (***)

Random posts

Ashton doesn’t like cats (^^)
Michael’s voice (^)
5 members of one direction (^^^)
Zayn leaving (!!!)
My friend and I on the phone (***)
What’s ‘wrong’ about she’s kinda hot (!!)
Michael’s porn tash (!!)
My reaction to the skh ep (!)
Michael is too precious (!)
Return of red Michael (!)
Michael’s reflection (***)
Luke is rude (***)
Calum in glasses (!!!)
Ashton in glasses (!!)
toasted Ashton (!!)
Return of Brashton (^)
Ashton winking/kissing  (!!!)

Visuals    

Dry humping (!)
People in chairs have more fun (!)
Yes sir!  (!)
We dont need the bedroom (!)
Eating out (***)
Teasing (***)
Keep your underwear on (***)
Bath/shower (**)
Under the table fun (**)
Midnight at the pool (**)
Lingerie (**)
Lets go to the kitchen! (**)
Against the wall  (**)
Thigh riding (**)
Car sex  (**)
Do you want to be a cowgirl? (*)
Angry fun  (*)
Squirting (*)
Bondage  (*)
Holding Hands (*)
Orgasm  (*)
Fingering (**)
FxFxM threesome (*)
Wedding night (*)
MXMXF threesome (*)
Grinding (*)
Anal

7

oh hey I said I would stop drawing The Half Cat shit like months ago or smthing but look how things come around in the end

also yeah uh sorry for not letting ritsu actually protecting mob or vice versa in a tanglible way I just. rly love the prolonged suffering

It fucking hurts him to do this. It really does because they’re like family. Blood brothers or some shit term that they learned after watching a movie when they were nine and made them feel closer than anything.

So it hurts.

But Sana is his actual sister. His baby sister who has spent the past few nights walking around the house like a zombie without an ounce of the sass he’s come to adore. This is Sana and Sana comes above all.

Yousef: hey bro, can I come over and chill?

Elias lets out a breath of air, thumbs moving absently as he puts just a fraction of what he wants to say to his best friend in text form.

Elias: i dont think so. we can go out or whatever later, but you need to keep your distance from my place.

There are several long seconds of silence and Elias can almost picture Yousef’s face as he blinks at the screen. Usually texting a warning that he wanted to come over was courtesy. Usually they didn’t even do that and just showed up at each other’s place. So yeah, he can only imagine the look of confusion.

Yousef: the other boys were there earlier… has something happened? I won’t eat in front of you guys or anything if that is what you’re worried about. I actually haven’t eaten all day. Habit i guess.

Elias thins his lips. The door next to his own opens and Sana walks out and pads down the hallway, not even sparing him a glance through his opened door.

Elias: No. 

Yousef: Elias? what the fuck?

Elias remembers the ways in which the boys teased his earlier this afternoon- the way they chanted “jealous” and laughed, rightfully ignorant of the real reason he is struggling with wanting anything to do with Yousef right now. 

He types out, sana is the best person in the world and then deletes it, and then i hope noora is worth the tears on my sister’s face, and then deletes it again.

He sighs and scrapes a hand over his head when Sana pads back to her room in silence; a ghost in her own home.

Elias: just stay away from us right now.

TEXT MEMES (SOME NSFW).

  • [text]: did you enjoy the pics? ;)
  • [text]: send me pictures
  • [text]: where are you? why aren’t you back yet?
  • [text]: I SWEAR TO GOD I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU
  • [text]: i dont know if this is what i want anymore
  • [wrong number text]: (muse name) has gone out for the night, i’m all alone ;)
  • [wrong number text]: i just don’t know if i love them anymore
  • [wrong number text]: can we forget about last night? don’t tell (muse name) please!
  • [wrong number text]: i fucked her/him aha ;-) told (muse name) it was just a drunk kiss tho
  • [text]: i love you so fucking much
  • [text]: i hate you
  • [drunk text]: UR SUCH A BITCH I H9 U 
  • [text]: i cannot stop thinking about you
  • [text]: i need you. now.
  • [text]: please respond. im so worried about you
  • [text]: last night was so GOOD
  • [text]: what are you wearing? ;)
  • [text]: is he bigger than me?
  • [text]: did you sleep with her ?!
  • [text]: you’re just a slut
  • [drunk text]: yOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL !!>!
  • [drunk text]: dont tell (muse name) but theY ARE so hot
  • [drunk text]: im iss youu
  • [text]: bed or floor? ;-)
  • [text]: not to be desperate or anything but im currently home alone and on the verge of jerking myself off to pictures of you. would be better if it was the real you though !
  • [text]: i want you naked.
  • [text]: are you going to the party on saturday?
  • [text]: i want to show you how much i love you
  • [text]: do you hate me?
  • [text]: i’m so sorry
  • [text]: WAS THAT A SEXT
  • [text]: family dinner tomorrow night, and i’m prolly gonna finger you under the table..
  • [text]: I just bought new underwear for the sole purpose of you taking it off
  • [text]: netflix and chill? 
  • [drunk text]: lveae me alone for 29 minutes !!! jeezss
  • [text]: damn you looked so good today. kinda wanted to bend you over that table you were leaning on lol 
  • [text]: where are you i have something you need to fix (its a boner)
  • [text]: wtf is the notebook even about?? “if you’re a bird then i’m a bird” ? they’re both humans
Yoonmin-Jungkook Pt.1
  • <p> <b></b> -Yoongi & Jimin get to share a bed-<p/><b>Jimin:</b> Looks like we'll be sleeping together.<p/><b>Yoongi:</b> Looks like it... wtf are you dipshits doing?<p/><b></b> [Jungkook and Jhope making a pillow barrier in the middle of the shared bed]<p/><b>Jungkook:</b> Just helping by preparing your bed for yah.<p/><b>Hoseok:</b> We wanna make sure our boyfriends have a good night rest tonight.<p/><b>Yoongi:</b> *Whispers into Jimin's ear* They think we're going to fuck.<p/><b>Jimin:</b> * Gaps then starts to blush hard* YOU TWO DONT TRUST US?<p/><b>Junghope:</b> HEY, WE TRUST YOU GUYS!!!<p/><b>Also Junghope:</b> These hoes aint loyal.<p/></p>

i know im a bit late hopping onto the back to school studyblr train, however its never too late for some homework help!! these are just some tips and tricks that i find useful when doing my homework. They work for me, and hopefully they’ll help you out too!!

Organising:

  1. Have a journal: Or any type of planner. I don’t know how these things work for other people, but my school gives out journals for us to use. If yours doesn’t, you should still buy one!! It can be a basic diary, or high end with gadgets coming out left right and centre, but regardless, you NEED one.
  2. Write down the homework you get: The second the teacher hands out homework, write it down. Subject : page and question : due date. It’s so frickin handy to be able to go home, take out your journal, look at the day’s homework and be able to immediately say “this is due tmrw, I better do it now”. It’s just so helpful for prioritising, staying on top of things and, most importantly, not forgetting your homework!!
  3. For long term projects/assignments: Write it in on the list of that day’s homework AND on the day its due!! Once the week is over you’re not going to be checking that page again so you need to have another reminder!!

Planning:

  1. Daily: Figure out how much time you have each day to do your homework. If you know you have basketball training on a thursday night, dont leave all the homework you have due on friday until then. Honestly, it couldn’t be more basic but the amount of people I know who do this on the daily.
  2. Weekly: Try and get all assignments from that week done over the weekend. I always think its far less stressful to start the week with a clean slate. This doesn’t apply to projects and stuff like that, but just the odd question you were given. You know, tidying up loose ends.
  3. Long term projects/assignments: We all know the age old saying “dont leave this til the night before” but, like, seriously don’t lmao. After doing your homework each night, try to do between 15m-1hr of work (depending on how much time you have til the deadline, how big the project is and how much you’ve already done that night).
  4. Write a list: So i have my list of what i need to do from todays homework and the other assignments that have accumulated in my journal. What next?? Write them out in the order you’re going to do them. If you have any short things you can quickly work through, do them first. It shortens your to-do list, gives you feeling of accomplishment and gets you into the swing of things. Next, homework due for tmrw, then the next day, then the next. Last but not least, any projects or long term assignments. Feel free to customize this order to whatever suits you best, but the above works wonders for me.

Random thoughts and tips: 

  1. Eat beforehand: Homework is hungry work, make sure your not going in on an empty stomach because it makes you unproductive and more irritable. Have a glass of water, mug of tea or whatever other drink you like next to you to keep you hydrated. It also stops you procrastinating because you “need” a drink, or “need” a snack. Just start!!
  2. Keep phone/laptop/whatever else ON and next to you: *gasp* i know, i know but honestly keep your device by you. Put it on silent, but have it so that you can do a bit of googling if needs be. Chances are you’ll get stuck on a question and want to look up the answer, or you’ll want some more in depth info on a topic or whatever else. Regardless, you’ll more than likely need it.
  3. Two piles: One for unfinished homework, one for finished. Keeps you organised AND it feels amazing to see the “to do” pile decrease and the “done” pile increase.

Most importantly: TEACHERS UNDERSTAND. You left your book in school, you got hours of homework from every teacher, you forgot your bag on the bus, or you simply just didn’t remember. If you generally have your homework in on time and are a good student, they’ll understand, it happens to the best of us. 

Hope these tips helped and maybe even gave you a bit of motivation!! Feel free to message me if there are any bits of this post that don’t make sense or if you have any thoughts/ideas :)))

anonymous asked:

Your dad sounds like a selfish fuck tbh

nah my dad is really great.

so much so that this ask actually kind of makes me mad.

like, my dad is incredibly loving and thoughtful.

did i ever say why my family left the church? when i came out as gay my dad and mom kinda went silent and we didnt talk a lot for a few days, but then one night at dinner my dad said “son, we’re not going to church on sunday” and when i asked him why he said “well, i was going over what you said, and i thought ‘i dont think my son is wrong to be who he is, so the church must be wrong’.”

and keep in mind, my dad was 50 at the time and he’s been an incredibly active member of the church for his entire life. he went to events, sponsored the boy scouts, held a position of honor in one of the quorums, all that good stuff. and it only took knowing his son was gay to leave.

so no, my dad is not selfish for not raising me with a silver spoon and i would urge you not to make those quick assumptions about people.

ISSA STORYTIME

Ok I’m bored so ima tell y’all a wild ass story that happened to me first semester of my college experience; the story of when I got laced by a wild thot with some CRACK. Let’s get into the tea gorls

So I went to art school for communications design. I dont go there no more because it was hella racist, but a different story for a different day. The campus I went to was way up north, in Utica. Never heard of it? Didn’t think you would. Just imagine if the worst neighborhood in Detroit was an entire town with like no people and cows. I don’t know about y’all but at my school we had this thing called late night where we get snacks and shit in the cafeteria after dinner. I was one of 6 black boys in my entire school so it was always dry. So this particular late night I had got a pink wig and started fucking around and giving these crackers some life to entertain myself. My extra ass being who I was did stand-up for the entire night. Since it was early in the school year tho I aint really have no solid friends, so the people who I was gonna go smoke with finished their food and left me like some fucking snakes. When I was done I was deep in my feelings lol because bitch…..you gon spark up…..without me???

I was like “y’know what idgaf, I don’t need you niggas” because I’m likable, right? I could talk to anyone I wanted and make friends. That’s what my dumb ass thought even though I knew damn well these all were some back woods ass white people from Cousin Fucker Nowhere. So I’m standing in front of the dorms like “ok, if I was a white person who loved giving free weed to negroes, what would I look like?” and as though Satan himself heard me, this girl wearing dem Jerusalem B.Cs (you know what I’m talmbout) and a bright jacket that had to be from the thrift store because it smelled like pickled dick and horse radish extract walked past. I was like DING DING DING, gotcha Becky!! So I was like “omg hi sis, I always see you in class and I think your style is so cool blah blah” and all that fake shit. Naturally Linda felt gassed af and immediately offered to let me smoke with her. Yeah, yah boi got it like that.

But mama ain’t raise no fool and I seent Get Out so I don’t go nowhere with a white person without at least one other poc with me. So this couple I’m good friends with now was walking out of the dorms, we just gon call them Peanut & Jelly. They were quiet and both shy people so they didnt hang out much yet. They were also native and latino which was good enough for me so my loud ass was like “Aye, y’all smoke??” it’s 2017 so of course they smoke and I invite them to come smoke some of Margret’s weed. Consider it reparations. Since they ain’t have no friends they were happy to come join us. Smh y’all if you see this I’m so sorry I got y’all into this lmao. Anyway Trisha was like “Super duper the more the merrier, let’s go :))” with her wild ass. But I remembered I still had some of my own weed left so we ran to my room and got it, but I ain’t have no bag to carry it in. So Ingrid said “Oh, I have a bag you can put it in” and pulled out this ashy ass ziploc bag. RED FLAG NUMBER ONE. But my clueless ass thought she just had some plaster or some shit in there before since we went to an art school. Smdh.

Originally posted by ihiphop

Shortly before we depart Peanut and I are getting everything together and making sure there’s no smell. While this is happening Jelly watches Rebecca spread some “dust” on her gums. RED FLAG NUMBER TWO. This nigga thought it was candy dust or something. No one in this equation is particularly bright. But anywhore, we started making moves to this parking lot/roof that we usually hung out at. I was hoping my friends fake asses would be there so I could ditch Jill’s ass. Peanut & Jelly I ain’t mind because they were cool once you got them to talk. I could tell they weren’t feelin Harriet tho lol and tbh neither was I but would your ass turn down a completely free spark up??? Didn’t think so. We get to the roof finally and I start checking my jacket to find I forgot my mini bong in my room. So Elizabeth is like “Oooh awesome we can smoke out of my pipe!” and I’m like lol you bougie ass bitch just call it a bowl. But my fake ass just said “Litty gorl, load that shit up!” thats exactly what I get. She starts loading her “pipe” up and I notice both my weed and hers lookin a lil ashy. AND THATS RED FLAG NUMBER THREE

It’s like 11 at night tho and we only had street lights so I didn’t wanna call Susan out and end up lookin a fool if it was nothing. So I just let her do her thing and pull out my lighter so we can make it do what it do ya feel? So we smokin and I’m having a pretty good time. I feel proud of myself and shit for scamming little Mary Ellen and getting a full spark up after my niggas rolled out on me. I’m like “haha bitch you did that and you high as fuck”. Me being the funny nigga I am in my head, I make myself laugh. Then I realize for someone who smokes pretty regularly and only had two hits, I was already shmizzed for some reason. I look over at Peanut & Jelly and both them niggas lookin like

“Already??? Huh, that’s weird”, young nigga Kam thought to himself. But once again it was free weed so I shut my Nancy Drew ass up and let it go. Debra passes the “pipe” to me and I hit it harder this time because I ain’t pay for it so ima get mines. Because I hit it so hard I kinda taste it and bitch, that shit tasted like Mary J. Bliges leather boots and plastic. So I’m like “yo Amanda, what’s good with your bowl the weed taste weird?” And it ain’t like weed has a particularly good taste but I know it damn sure don’t taste like that. Emily proceeds to say “I don’t think anything’s wrong with the weed, might be the other stuff tho” As soon as she said that shady shit Peanut and I’s heads snapped to look at her like “Bitch….what other stuff??”

Jelly at this point is checked the fuck out, like this nigga is walking through space or some shit. That might just be him tho cause that nigga always acts weird when he high smh. That ain’t the point tho. This raggedy Ann ass hoe starts giggling and laughing like someone said something fuckin funny. I’m sitting there confused and high as shit still got the fucking pink wig on, Peanut got her ass riled up and with good reason because we both know we just asked ole girl a question. So Peanut says one more gain “Did you put some shit in the fucking weed?”. By now I think Amber realizes the joke is nay and she’s close to getting stomped out. Here comes the climax of the story y’all. This bitch gon roll her eyes like we being extra and say “lol it’s fine, we just smoked out of my crack pipe and I haven’t cleaned it yet” When I tell you the entire world went silent, I heard SZA wheezing into her microphone miles away. My ass, Peanut ass, and even Jelly incapacitated ass was all like

“…wut?”

Jelly just started laughing like he just heard the funniest thing ever in his whole life. Peanut was staring at Tina like she was preparing her alibi for the police when they find that lil girl’s body. And me, you ask? I was just thinkin bout my girl Whitney. Like sis, is this how it started for you? I was looking at Rachel all hurt. Et tu Becky? All a nigga wanted was some weed and now my ass sitting on a roof high off crack. Suddenly time returns to normal and the only thing my faded ass can muster is a “Pardon me???” Helen continues to chuckle like she Tiffany Haddish up in this bitch and tells us that she smokes crack and weed out of that bowl sometimes, and that we had placed the collective weed in her coke bag. Jelly stupid ass still in the corner laughing to keep from crying because I knew that baby voiced nigga was scared. I’m so astounded at this point that I can’t even drag this wild ass bitch. Peanut however, is not me. Lort I never seen anyone but my momma yolk somebody up so fast! She smooth slid across that asphalt like

Grabbed Ellie, and said “BITCH HAVE YOU LOST YOUR FUCKING MIND?? ARE YOU SERIOUS??” and started shaking that bitch like she was tryna give her shaken baby syndrome. Jelly managed to get himself together enough to try and keep his girl from going to jail. What was I doing? Well I knew I had a choice, I could help Peanut throw Taylor off the roof, or I could help Jelly keep our good sis from catchin a charge. So I chose the smartest option. MY ASS STARTED TO HIT FOOT.

That shit wasn’t none of my business no more!! Bitch the link up is over! The deck is DONE. I could already hear my momma belt whoopin my crack head ass in my mind, no thank you ma’am! My black ass was done for the night. As I’m running back towards campus I hear footsteps behind me. I turn around to find Jelly running behind me, dragging Peanut along by the hand. Chloe however, is nowhere to be found. I ain’t stop running tho. Was it fear, was it anger, was it the adrenaline pushing me to run? Nah I was on crack so it was prolly that lol. We run until we’re two blocks away from campus and I’m finally too tired to run, which surprised me because I always assumed crackheads were just like the enegizer bunny. So we’re catching our breath and I’m tryna keep from falling over because I feel hella whoozy, but I manage to ask “What happened to Bobby?” Peanut proceeds to tell me she took one good fist, and dropped Katy like a bad habit. I was proud of sis too because she’s twig thin and I thought she was meek af. We start walking back to the dorms and all 3 of us are just silent. Ain’t nobody got shit to say bitch we on crack. Peanut and I lived 2 doors down from each other so they go in her room and I go in mine after we say our good nights. I go in my room and my roommate is there with his boyfriend. Immediately my roommate is like “lol you’re high af” and my overly trusting ass gon tell him “This girl laced the weed with crack”. This cracker ass bitch gon look at me and say “oh really…..are you ok?” like I just got into a small argument. Like nigga….I GOT LACED WITH CRACK DO I LOOK OK???

So I sit down and start watching videos on my laptop to try and distract myself from my anxiety because a nigga was SHOOKT to the core. My roommate and his boyfriend were just watching me like I was a good ass episode of something. I don’t blame ‘em tho, I looked wild af. I was twitching, teetering, and sweating like shit even though it was late September in upstate New York. Now this fake ass bitch gon take a snapchat video of my crackhead ass trippin and put it on his story for everyone to see. Needless to say after that day ain’t nobody fuck with Molly ever again. One good thing did come out of it tho, Peanut, Jelly, and I became real tight after that. And what became of Becky you ask? She made sure to steer clear of all 3 of us and my friends lol because they threatened to cut that hoe. Moral of the story children? Don’t trust white people.

They asked why we stayed together for so long

I say… I dont know

I just know we cried the exact same time in every movie 

I know we blushed everyday for the first two years

I know I always stole the covers and she never woke me up

I know the exact look on her face the night she used my toothbrush

The next day I brushed my teeth 30 some times

Cause I didnt want to let her go

You have to understand

But it hurt to love her

It hurt the way the light hurts your eyes in the middle of the night 

But I had to see