we don't wanna talk about it

5
Band instruments as things I've heard them say
  • Piccolo: .... (I don't think I've ever heard them speak. Thinks they're better than everyone and doesn't talk to other band kids)
  • Flute: guess what 'band director' said about 'piccolo'
  • Oboe: *quietly playing a solo, very concentrated*
  • Bassoon: *squeak*
  • Clarinet: we're gonna play those two notes ff instead of p so it sounds like 'DOOT DOOT' wanna help
  • Bass clarinet: I don't think I play here
  • Alto saxophone: I can fit my whole mouthpiece down my throat I'll show you
  • Tenor saxophone: we either play 4 half notes the entire song...or constant 32nd notes....I don't understand
  • Bari saxophone: so do I do sectionals with the trombones, or...?
  • Trombones: *screams into instrument*
  • Tuba: why am I even here
  • French horn: (secluded, doesn't speak much. Very put together. Know what they're doing)
  • Trumpet: *clearly plays wrong note* that wasn't me
  • Percussion: *screaming* RATCHET SUPREMACY
How to Get a Little to Stop Procrastinating:
  • Me: I miss you Daddy.
  • Daddy: I miss you too, are you doing your paper?
  • Me: Kinda...
  • Daddy: hmm?
  • Me: I just wanna color :(
  • Daddy: Color later
  • Me: But... but... Daddy...
  • Daddy: Paper
  • Me: Uggggggggggggggggggggggggg
  • Daddy: Come on now Kitten
  • Me: I so literally just want to not do it.
  • Daddy: No
  • Me: I'm doing it. Just lots of breaks to cry about how much I hate this
  • Daddy: awwww. I'll reward you if you finish it.
  • Me: Oooo what kind of reward?
  • Daddy: New stuffie
  • Me: ... Daddy.... are we being serious here....
  • Daddy: One big enough to cover your bed... maybe
  • Me: Daddy....
  • Daddy: Hm?
  • Me: Don't mess with me here. This is serious business you're talking about
  • Daddy: Maybe not that big. But a stuffie.
  • Me: Well now I have to finish this paper even if it kills me.
  • more than survive: cool opening number yass starring high school sterotypes
  • i love play rehearsal: hot girl isn't so hot when you squint
  • the squip song: gets louder applause than the opening number
  • two-player game: two bros,,, chillin in a bedroom,,,, ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
  • the squip enters: dangit
  • be more chill part 1: so we're not supposed to like him, right?
  • do you want a ride?: help help help we're in high school help help help
  • be more chill part 2: u suck
  • more than survive (reprise): stop being a teenage boy, jeremy
  • a guy that i'd kinda be into: we know who she's talking about, cmon, there's another act
  • upgrade: p0Or MicHaEL :((//(( WweHWHEHG
  • halloween: yo this is the showstopping number of this act
  • do you wanna hang?: help help help we're in high school help help help part 2
  • michael in the bathroom: hAH, U THOUGHT THE APPLAUSE FOR THE SQUIP SONG WAS LOUD, WELL THIS BINCH GETS A STANDING OVATION WHOO
  • the smartphone hour (rich set a fire): ok i lied this is the show stopping number whoops
  • the pitiful children: don't show this to the six five nights at freddy's fans that still exist and lurk in the corners of the internet, they'll rip it apart, spit on it and throw it off a cliff
  • the pants song: actually a rlly good song nice job mr heere ft michael
  • the play: climax starring miChAEL MAKES AN ENTRAAAANCE
  • voices in my head: wait it's over?? whAT NO GO BACK GO BACK GO BACK I WANNA SEE IT AGAIN WAIT WAIT WAIT

hey i wanna talk about erik klose

  • “i feel like he could hold me up forever” erik isn’t just emotional support he’s a soccer player and he is s t r o n g
    • he got them Midfielder Thighs™
  • he fuckin loves soccer movies ok 
    • nicky, already grinning, in response to erik’s parents asking how his day was: alles ist gut
    • erik, sliding into the room in his socks and running into a wall: soLANGE DU WILD BIST!!!!!
    • used Bend It Like Beckham and She’s The Man to practice his english
    • he definitely has a poster of jess bhamra in his room, she’s his hero
  • he is SUPER tall
    • (he’s actually taller than matt when his hair isn’t spiked)
  • him and nicky are low key competitive as fuck and they run together when nicky starts training for exy
  • nicky quickly learns that trying to outlast a midfielder on a run just. doesn’t work. they do the most running on the team and typically go whole games without getting subbed out.
    • 3 miles in nicky is wheezing and dying and erik is laughing like the absolute traitor he is
  • but!! it wasn’t all sunshine at first i mean come on,, this is the foxes
    • when nicky first got to the Klose’s he was reserved, quiet. 
    • erik was taking a year off to travel with friends during the first 6 months nicky was there
    • when both parents agreed nicky could stay for the summer for some extra classes so he could graduate on time (by american standards), he finally met erik
    • tall, athletic, kind erik, erik who came home with all kinds of candy from all kinds of countries to give to a boy he never met all to make a pun about what a “sweet deal” it was to have someone new in the house, he felt his heart race when nicky smiled at him for his ridiculous efforts
    • that’s the first time the klose’s saw a real smile come from nicky
  • erik convinced nicky to go to church after a while
    • it was hard at first, especially when nicky noticed erik was getting some weird looks from some of the older people in the congregation
    • when nicky asked why, erik told him about how when he came out his grandmother stopped speaking to him, and how some parents didn’t want to let erik come over to see his friends
    • but then erik told him how his parents told anyone who wasn’t okay with their son that they weren’t worth having around, that they loved erik and they wouldn’t allow anyone to try and make him feel bad for being himself
    • and how his cousins snuck out and took him to his first pride parade in hamburg
    • surrounded by people who actually care, nicky started to hope again
  • nicky starts to smile more and erik…he’s so smitten. his new mission in life is to make nicky smile
  • erik’s humor is usually really awful puns and dad jokes, but he also is really good at keeping a straight face while saying absolutely ridiculous things, leading people to question whether he’s really serious or not and nicky fighting super hard not to bust out laughing (because he’s the only one who can tell he’s joking)
  • nicky prides himself on being pretty fashionable so he’s not entirely sure how the hell he lets erik get away with wearing those awful toe shoes. the. the individual toe ones.
    • you know the ones
  • the first time they kiss, erik was climbing a tree and fell out, because all his grace stops the minute he steps off the field
    • it was a forehead kiss because, well, erik’s face was bleeding, but yea
    • they’re a bit of a mess, but they’re cute, ya know?
  • nicky and erik are the type of couple to go to the grocery store at 2am because they really want to make mac n cheese and accidentally end up buying 4 pounds of candy instead while serenading each other to the weird 90s music the store is playing
  • erik loves aldi’s and wants to live there. everything is so cheap, nicky. they have my favorite cheese, nicky. nicky. where are you going. nicky i live here don’t leave we haven’t bought any bread yet-
  • he owns crocs. he just. he does. he bought orange ones when nicky joined the foxes and fuckin little white fox paw insert thingies because he’s a supportive boyfriend, dammit
  • he draws smiley faces on everything. notes to nicky, his notes at school, on his meeting notes at work, and his favorite place: on nicky. 
  • he’s one of those people who can’t tan for shit, he just burns then freckles. nicky is constantly nagging him to wear sunscreen. he always forgets and sends nicky pictures of his bright red shoulders only to get pages of texts ranting about sunscreen and melanoma
  • he’s got scars everywhere but theyre all from like. the dumbest stuff. there’s a big one on his knee from sneezing while on a run and subsequently tripping on the sidewalk and wiping out. several are from falling out of trees. he broke his nose falling out of the shower because he freaked out when he saw a spider. again, all his grace is on the soccer field. everywhere else he’s a hazard.
  • he’s really, really clumsy. he loves fiercely because that’s how his parents taught him. he knows he’s lucky to have a family that stuck by him, he knows it’s the least they can do, but so many gay kids have shitty parents. kids like nicky. and erik may be gangly and clumsy. he may be competitive and he may not always understand how nicky feels because he hasn’t experienced what nicky has. but he has fallen out of more trees than anybody he knows, and falling in love with nicky is an ache he’s never been able to ice away, and would never want to anyway.

fame💄 trixie🎀 pearl😴😴 then there’s that☝️ol tired💤ass long horsefaced violet🐴 them 4️⃣ just wear my nerves😡😤 OUT they don't🙅✖️ know shit💩about performing💃🏼🕺🏻 all they wanna do is talk💬🗣and walk👯‍♂️🚶🏼 they ass🍑 in their fucking heels👠👡👢 and that’s ❌🚫NOT DRAG🚫❌‼️ i don't🙅like shit💩 about them young🚼👶🏻 hoes👧🏻 ❌not❌ the air🌫💨they breathe🌬 ❌not❌ they boney☠️ ass slim up⬆️and down⬇️↕️ pole bodies🚹 i would love❤️to send👉 all of them bitches💁home🏚💼in 1️⃣ wop👏 especially violet🐎 where ya panties👙 girl?🤔🤷‍♀️ we don't😷wanna see👀🙈that barbie👱🏻‍♀️👸🏼doll mannequin 👬 pussy 🐱 cover 😣✋️that ass🍑 🆙 panties,👙 bitch🐴😡❗️

so you’re telling me eva mohn doesn’t get a follow up on her self discovery, vilde hellerud doesn’t get to talk about her family and struggles (and her casual racism and ableism tbqh), chris berg doesn’t get to possess more than one (1) personality trait (=which is FUNNY btw), and sana bakkoush doesn’t get to address the microaggressions, misconceptions and/or islamophobia against her even within her own friend group…

but we get to ,,,wrap up,,, noorhelm but NOT in a garbage bag… okay

Ryan Ross X Brendon Urie
  • Ryan: Yeah, Brendon? He's my boy, always will be. I don't wanna talk about Ryden, if it was real or not, let's just keep it in the past. I'm alright.
  • Brendon: Ryan Ross? Pffff! Who that mothafucka? I don't know him, never heard of him, we were never in love, because he doesn't exist. Ryden? The fuck is Ryden? The fuck is milk fic? I'm married did you know that? Hey, look at my high note.
What went down in Moana
  • Gramma Tala: imma terrify the s**t out of some little kids
  • Chief Tui: you're a very bad example for my daughter
  • Gramma Tala: ikr
  • Moana: *is cute and helpless, wanders to the ocean*
  • Sea turtle: *is cute and helpless, fails to wander to ocean*
  • Moana: holy s**t birds, don't eat the turtle
  • Birds: fine, whatevs
  • Ocean: thanks for the turtle Moana
  • Moana: no prob
  • Ocean: I am the last waterbender from the southern water tribe, and I—
  • Moana: skip the exposition please
  • Ocean: ok yeah, anyway you helped the turtle and so you're definitely worthy of this incredibly important and dangerous magical artifact
  • Moana: kk cool, imma drop it on the beach
  • Ocean: no come back you little s**t!
  • Gramma Tala: ooh, shiny!
  • Tamatoa: did somebody say shiny?
  • Gramma Tala: not yet Tamatoa, go away
  • Chief Tui: hey Moana, wanna hear a song?
  • Moana: sure, as long as it's during a montage
  • Chief Tui: hey Moana, come and see this big stack of rocks that every chief put here
  • Moana: wait, so every chief we've ever had has placed a rock here?
  • Chief Tui: yeah
  • Moana: and what happens if a future plot point suggests that not every chief lived on this island?
  • Chief Tui: ok, go away now
  • Heihei: *eats an entire f**king rock*
  • Villagers: yo some serious s**t is happening to everything
  • Moana: this is definitely related to the one obscure legend my grandmother told me ten years ago
  • Chief Tui: Moana don't you f**king dare
  • Moana: *f**king dares and also wrecks her boat*
  • Gramma Tala: whatever just happened, blame it on the pig
  • Ocean: no, defs blame it on Moana
  • Moana: what are you doing, Gramma Tala?
  • Gramma Tala: I'm crazy, so go into this cave
  • Lin-Manuel Miranda: hey Moana, we were voyagers
  • Moana: thanks Lin-Manuel Miranda!
  • Lin-Manuel Miranda: no prob!
  • Moana: hey Gramma Tala, we were voyagers!
  • Gramma Tala: yeah, no s**t
  • Moana: hey Dad, we were voyagers!
  • Chief Tui: f**k you Moana
  • Moana: so how do you explain that stack of rocks
  • Chief Tui: I don't?
  • Gramma Tala: *conveniently dies*
  • Moana: welp, bye
  • Ocean: oh no, not you little s**t again
  • Moana: f**k you ocean
  • Ocean: here have a big f**king thunderstorm
  • Moana: *wrecks her boat, again*
  • Moana: fish pee in you, all day
  • Ocean: bacteria s**t in your mouth, all day
  • Maui: A boat!
  • Moana: holy s**t who are you?
  • Maui: I'm glad you asked because I wrote a song about that
  • Moana: I don't f**king care
  • Maui: well, I'm stealing your boat
  • Moana: does that boat even work? I wrecked it
  • Maui: idk, bye now
  • Ocean: *puts Moana on the boat*
  • Moana: you wanna come on my quest
  • Maui: no
  • Moana: please
  • Maui: ok fine
  • Kakamora: *attack*
  • Ocean: *smashes Kakamora boats together*
  • Moana: that was convenient
  • Ocean: ikr
  • Maui: you wanna get my fishhook
  • Moana: oh hell yes
  • Maui: here's a cliff, don't climb it
  • Moana: *climbs it, doesn't die*
  • Maui: here's a thousand foot drop to the realm of monsters, don't jump off it
  • Moana: *jumps off it, doesn't die*
  • Maui: here's a giant carnivorous plant, don't jump in its mouth
  • Moana: *jumps in its mouth, doesn't die*
  • Maui: here's a terrifying sloth monster, don't antagonize it
  • Moana: *antagonizes it, doesn't die*
  • Tamatoa: HEY GUYS
  • Moana: do you wanna talk about yourself?
  • Tamatoa: ok let's begin with the fact that I'm a fabulous shiny shimmering cinnamon roll
  • Maui: you're really not all that great
  • Tamatoa: m*********er I sparkle with the light of a million stars
  • Maui: my bragging song is better than yours
  • Tamatoa: I don't care because I'm f**kin beautiful
  • Maui: Tamatoa x Reader fanfiction exists and it's terrifying
  • Tamatoa: HOLY S**T WHAT?!
  • Maui: ok he's distracted, imma stealin my hook
  • Tamatoa: WHY WOULD ANYBODY WRITE THAT?!
  • Moana: ok, we got out of there
  • Maui: you should have died at least twenty times in there
  • Moana: ikr
  • Maui: my hook's not working btw
  • Moana: only an act of true love can repair a broken hook
  • Maui: nope, got it!
  • Moana: ok nevermind, wrong movie
  • Maui: so here's a lava monster, let's fight it
  • Te Kā: *throws fire, breaks Maui's hook*
  • Moana: only an act of true love can repair—
  • Maui: forget it, bye now
  • Gramma Tala: hey Moana, here's some important advice for you
  • Moana: thanks, I'm going to fight the lava monster now
  • Gramma Tala: wait, what? that's just stupid
  • Moana: and you shouldn't be giving me advice on how to stay alive if you can't even manage that yourself
  • Gramma Tala: bye now
  • Moana: *goes to fight Te Kā*
  • Maui: hey I'm still here
  • Moana: good 'cause imma die out here
  • Maui: go find Te Fiti
  • Moana: Te Fiti isn't here
  • Te Kā: YES I AM
  • Moana: oh hey that's convenient
  • Ocean: *moseses*
  • Moana: *does an epic walk*
  • Te Kā: *does a frantic monster crawl*
  • Moana: *keeps walking*
  • Te Kā: *doesn't kill Moana for some reason*
  • Moana: here's your heart back
  • *everything is magically fixed*
  • Maui: hey Te Fiti, sorry for f**king up all the s**t
  • Te Fiti: I could smite the ever-loving s**t out of you rn
  • Maui: please don't
  • Te Fiti: fine
  • Moana: imma go home now
  • Maui: so we're getting a sequel, right?
  • Moana: nope, they're making a second Frozen
  • ROLL CREDITS
Prayer request

So there’s a very good chance that the mass in my dad’s esophagus is cancer, but nothing’s been finalized yet. I really need some prayers for him and my family.

(Also if you know me irl and like know my parents don’t talk to your parents or anyone else… we don’t want to worry people and he’ll tell them himself if he needs to.)

2

Shower Part 1: i am

2016

SNK 93 in a nutshell
  • FIRST, TO THOSE WHO ARE STILL CONFUSED:
  • The setting: We are now in Marley, 4 years after the battle for Shiganshina. After losing the colossal titan to Armin, the Marley military weakened, causing a rival to start a war. They just won that war.
  • THE CAST:
  • Reiner: He's about 21 now. Big bro figure to the younger warriors. Remorseful.
  • Zeke: Important warrior, respected by Eldians and Marley alike. Royal blood.
  • Magath: The Marley commander in charge of Eldian Warriors. Rough and pragmatic, but not a horrible person.
  • Galliard: Current holder of Ymir's titan (Oh yeah, Ymir got eaten). Medium-High key bitter towards Reiner for letting his brother, Marcel, die.
  • Peak: The Mule Titan holder. A cute girl. *SHOCK AND AWE* She seems pretty chill.
  • The Warrior Cadets (all about 14):
  • Gabi: Excitable, proud, and capable. Loves Reiner a lot, unclear if it's hero worship or if she's pulling an Asuka and wants his ARMORED DICK.
  • Falco: The Shinji Ikari in this Asuka-Shinji-Kaji analogy. Doesn't want to be a warrior, disillusioned. Very selfless, but pretty sarcastic. Probably likes Gabi.
  • Udo: Paranoid, loud, speaks his mind, and kicks shit when he's mad.
  • Sophia: Little shit, deadpan, may or may not be best girl.
  • NOW LET'S GET STARTED:
  • Marley Admiral: So basically what you're saying is that we won, but at the cost of revealing to the whole world that the Titans are totally beatable with modern military technology.
  • Magath: Not to mention, we're in some serious shit since we colonized all those foreign people thinking the titan's power was enough to keep them in check. So we've got more shitstorms approaching than we can count on your two hands.
  • Zeke: Guys, I think we should invade the walls and try to get our titans back.
  • Admiral: Were you listening to anything anyone said in the past 5 minutes?
  • Zeke: Yes, and that's why we need to get the titans as soon as possible while they'll still serve as some minor deterrent. That way we can build up our military.
  • -------------------
  • Colt: Wow Zeke, you sure are cool, talking to Marley officers without bowing towards them the mandatory 9 times.
  • Zeke: Eh.
  • Colt: You're also the coolest titan ever. For some reason, when you inject someone with your titan's spinal fluid, you can turn them into titans and then control them when you want. Why can you do that? It's not like you have ryal blood.
  • Zeke: Heh Heh, yeah, totally. By the way, wanna hear a secret.
  • Colt: What?
  • Zeke, noticing Magath approaching: I can use my titan's long-ass arms to wipe my titan's hairy-ass ass.
  • Magath: Please, don't mind me. Continue talking about your titan's ass.
  • Zeke: Oh nevermind, let's exposition the audience some more.
  • Magath: Sounds good.
  • Zeke: All our ships we sent to the walls vanished, presumably destroyed by their titans. Not to mention, they have the Ackermen(TM) who were genetically engineered using Titan Science(TM) to kick my ass and haunt my dreams.
  • ------------------
  • Reiner, having dreams about almost dying twice: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH.
  • Galliard: Sup bitch, I saw you having a nightmare so I decided not to wake you.
  • Galliard: By the way, fuck you for letting my brother (Marcel) die by being eaten by Ymir. Well, at least I got to eat Ymir and get his power back.
  • Audience: OH GOD MY SHIP IS DEAD.
  • Peak: Hey guys, I'm the cart titan and also a cute girl.
  • Audience: .........go on.
  • ------------------------------
  • Gabi, Falco, Udo, and Sophia hanging by the ocean:
  • Reiner: Heya, kiddos!
  • Gabi: REINER HI I MISSED YOU DID YOU MISS ME!
  • Reiner: Sure did, kiddo! *Pats head*
  • Sophia and Udo: Oh hey it's Reiner! *Head over to Reiner*
  • Reiner: *Pats heads*
  • Reiner: Hi, Falco!
  • Falco: ....Hello.
  • Gabi: HEY REINER LETS GO INTO TOWN!
  • Reiner: *Sneaks head pat onto Falco*
  • Falco: Reiner should be in bed.
  • Gabi: Falco, you can Falgo fuck yourself.
  • Reiner: *Urge to protect these adorable children intensifies*
  • ----------------------------
  • On a train heading back to their internment camp:
  • Colt, drunk off his ass: THREE CHEERS FOR GABI SHE'S A GODDESS OH MY GOD GABI YOU SAVED US ALL
  • Gabi: LET GO COLT I CAN'T BREATH
  • General: Magath, shut them up.
  • Magath: Oh, let them have their fun.
  • Reiner: So Gabi's probably going to inherit my Titan.
  • Falco: Yeah, and then she won't live a day past 27, if that.
  • Reiner: Are you talking shit about inheriting one of the 9 titans? You know they can punish you for that.
  • Falco: No, I, uh, Inheriting the titans sound great!
  • Reiner: Then do you want to? Do you want to inherit it in her place?
  • Falco: *Thinks about how Gabi will die if she inherits it*
  • Falco: Yes, I want to inherit it instead.
  • Reiner: Then become a better warrior than Gabi. Please, you have to, if you want to save her from the hell I went through.
Is it just me or are Chanyeol's eyes amazing

-Cee

COLE TALKING ABOUT ALMOST SEX SCENE WITH LILI
  • Interviewer: I don't wanna get weird but was it, like, were you nervous at all for it?
  • Cole Sprouse: Not really. Lili and I are... professionals and I was excited so, it was great.
  • Me: professionals? I think the right term you were looking for is 'secretly-dating-but-not-so-secret-at-all-because-we-cant-keep-our-hands-off-each-other-in-public'