Can I just talk about how important this press conference is to me. He just got back from Afghanistan after months of torture. He refused to go to the hospital and instead immediately went to a press conference. He could barely stand, and instead had everybody sit with him, but he showed up.
“We have become comfortable with a system of zero accountability” Tony’s first thought when he arrived home, now aware that bad people were using his weapons was to stop it. He didn’t go to the hospital or to his own home. He went to the public and told them.
‘Hey bad shit happened because of me, so I’m going to hold me accountable, and I’m gonna tell you what I’m going to do so you can hold me accountable too.’
Now when I get home from vacation the only thing I want to do is go home, and I don’t generally have emotionally scarring things happen during my vacations. I just miss my home. After months in Afghanistan I’m sure Tony did too. Yet he prioritized shutting down weapons to that. Which he should have, but it shows incredible strength of character.
I’m just so proud of him as a character. Like good for you Tony.
okay but lets talk abt how easy it is to abuse psychotic people, esp if youre nonpsychotic. ppl know that clustered ppl are easier to abuse but no one mentions those on the psychosis-spec when honestly, its a big deal.
it is so easy to gaslight us, because our perceptions of reality are already warped anyway. so when someone makes us doubt, we will believe them (even with actual proof of the opposite sometimes), because we cannot trust ourselves.
when we trust you, its so easy to make us dependent on you? its so easy to tell us youll keep us safe, and that the bad things youre doing are to help us.
you can so easily feed into our delusions, either by making us distrust everyone else (esp if were paranoid) or to make us trust you more, or just to get a good old laugh.
making us believe were hallucinating when were not, purposefully twisting our words when were disorganised, making us depend on you for a check on reality, telling us you know whats best for us bc our psychosis will make us cope in “bad” ways, ignoring what we tell you, blaming our reactions on our psychosis, making us seem irrational, threatening to hospitalise us because people will definitely believe you when you say were dangerous, there is so much more which nonpsychotic people do that no one talks about.
but most importantly:
you can excuse your abuse, make others believe youre in the right, because we wouldnt know whats best for us, right? no one would believe us when they know were psychotic, and thats so easy to take advantage of.
people really have to look out more for psychotic people that are being abused, and trust their words over their abuser’s
(please spread the word also if youre nonpsychotic)
Women are people. Women face misogyny regardless of what they do.
Sometimes people do bad things. Some of the people who do bad things are women.
When women do bad things, that justifies criticism. It does not justify misogyny, or sexualized insults.
For instance: If a female politician votes against health care for poor people, it’s important to talk about how that will get people killed.
That doesn’t make it ok to call her ugly, mock her body, or make comments about how she needs to get laid. None of that has anything to do with health insurance. None of that is valid criticism. None of that serves any constructive purpose. It’s just misogyny.
Directing misogynistic insults at any woman is harmful to all women. It sends the message that there’s no problem with misogyny so long as the woman is a bad person who has it coming somehow. This implies that the only real disagreement about misogyny is about which women deserve it.
We need to object to misogyny in principle, regardless of who the target is. Misogyny is not criticism. It’s just destructive hatred.
I feel we talk about signs of abuse from the victims standpoint but not from the abusers standpoint. In order to stop emotional abuse and recognize when we engage in unhealthy behaviors I made this list.
Do you react to important people in your life by ignoring them completely and not acknowledging their presence? Especially if they do something you don’t like?
Do you feel that your partner/friends/family members are the cause of your bad moods or frustration?
Does your partner/etc “do things the wrong way”?
Do criticize your partner/etc for being unreliable or a bad person?
Do you feel you have to constantly overlook your partners flaws in order to be around them?
Are you frequently accused of being “moody” or “hard to please”?
Do your partners complain that “nothing they do is good enough?
Do your partners appear to avoid you when you are angry or upset rather then comfort you?
Do you negatively comment on their intelligence or appearence? Either in private or in front of others.
Do you blame them when someone goes wrong?
Do you ever use phrases like “I could just hit you right now” or “I”m so mad I could punch something”?
Do you ever punch walls/throw things in front of your partner/etc?
Do you leave during fights and not inform of where you are going and when you will be back?
Do you behave the same alone with your partner that you do if you were in front of your friends or in public?
Have you frequently accused your partner of being too sensitive?
How often is your partner praised and complimented by yourself?
Do you think your partner spends too much time with friends and family?
Do you feel your partners friends and family are trying to drive you apart?
Do you refuse to actively comfort your partner when they are upset or angry especially if you don’t really understand why they feel the way they do?
If your partner brings up a behavior that bothers them do you respond by discussing how to change it or do you respond defensively?
Do you have difficulty apologizing?
All of these things are abuse tactics. Obviously even the healthiest of us will do these sometimes but if any one becomes a regular habit that’s when the problem starts.
Edit: Due to several requests I would like to add many of these are also symptoms of bpd or Borderline Personality Disorder as well those struggling with mental illness. Proper communication and understanding with your partner or family member is very important. Having a mental illness is not an excuse to be abusive however being mentally ill puts someone at higher risk of being abused. I highly recommend therapy if at all possible although this is just as someone who has been to a ton of it. My askbox is always open. Please no instant messages without my permission.
we’re having a heatwave !! which is lovely because i love hot weather, but im bad at temperature adjustment and regulation which can be bad. i also know that lots of other autistics find hot weather sensory hell, so here r a few things that i find help:
- you dont Have to be in the sun all day. lots of people will say stuff tht makes u feel guilty about “wasting the good weather”, but they dont know how it affects u personally, so do whats best for u. if u wanna stay inside all day or never leave the shade, do it!! its better to b comfortable than anything else
- this goes doubly if u live in a place where u actually get aircon in non commercial buildings
- wear as few clothes as possible. sounds obvious, but youd be surprised at how much difference not having even one layer makes. if youre self conscious abt ur body, invest in some mesh or sheer clothing - its stylish, v thin and light, and will obscure ur form
- if u r wearing clothes, wet them !! this helps So Much its my fav tip. wetting a hat or pouring water down ur shirt cools u down a load, and can help u stay cool until it all evaporates. last year i managed to be the only one to mostly avoid heatstroke when hiking by doing this. having wet trousers/shorts is sensory hell for me, so i stick to just my shirt. if u cant cope w that, keep a damp cloth on u and put it on ur skin whenever u can
- drink A Lot. if ur thirsty, ur probably already dehydrated. dehydration can lead to feeling sick, headachy, and exasperates sensory issues (i usually burn out twice as often if im dehydrated). to avoid this, drink lots of water.
do u hate drinking water? yeah, me too. keeping a bottle full on u is good because its just There so u end up drinking it because its smth to do. alternately, drink lots of juice/iced tea/soda (fizzy drinks dehydrate u a bit, but theyre better than nothing!)
if u wanna rehydrate quickly, sports drinks r the way to go bc they replace electrolytes (cheap alternative: dissolve salt n sugar into water)
- crunch on ice !! it cools u down, it hydrates u, and u can Lov The Cronch
- dont get burnt: it leads to sunburn which is Sensory Hell, can give u heat stroke, and long term skin damage. do u hate sun cream? Me Too, but its better than sunburn. instead of the gross lotiony suncreams, u can get oil based ones (p20 is the brand here, idk if its international) which tend to b more expensive, but last a full 24hrs, feel non gloopy, and dont smell as strong
- sleep w just a bed sheet as covers bc its much cooler, but u still have the feeling of smth covering u
- ur feet r the most important for temp regulation , so keep them cool most importantly
- cold showers r great but also painful so a softer alternative is room temp showers bc theyll still cool u down without freezing ur various body parts off
- mope on the floor like 24/7 it doesnt exactly cool u down but it doesnt use much energy n its perfect for that summery sluggishness. fav activity 10/10 would recommend
South Node is where we are comfortable so, sometimes we have a tendency to stay there with that traits and we don’t change.
South Node in 1st House: “I have myself, I don’t need other people, I can do everything by myself!”
South Node in 2nd House:“ I have what I need, I don’t need to share, why don’t other people share it as well or work as I did?”
South Node in 3rd House:“ I already know that, why do you think you’re smarter than me? Why should I explore when I have a great neighbourhood here?”
South Node in 4th House:“ I had a hard life already, why should I get even more tired and work harder? I don’t need to achieve anything else, I already have a foundation to fall in!”
South Node in 5th House:“ Why should I connect even more with people if I’m happy the way I am? Why can’t you let me have a little fun and enjoy life, why do I always have to care about how it will influence others lives?”
South Node in 6th House: “ Why can’t I help that person and do that job and fix that thing all at the same time? Why do I need to rest? I have energy! I’m not weak! Why do I need to get in touch with my soul if he’s not gonna help me with this?”
South Node in 7th house:“ Why do I have to focus on myself, can’t you see they need me, can’t you see that everybody needs me, I don’t have time for me! Why should I get to know me better if I’m not interacting with myself in the world?”
South Node in 8th House:“ Why should I keep something if it doesn’t have meaning? For my comfort? I don’t think so! Why do I need to stop taking things so deeply? Why do I need peace? I like living in chaos! I don’t need a quiet space and why should I appreciate things if they all end?”
South Node in 9th House:“ Why can’t I just learn about the whole world? Why do I need to focus on little things? Why do I need magazines and newspapers to know what’s happening? I can go and discover by myself! Why should I focus more on my environment? I’m a part of the whole world!”
South Node in 10th House:“ Why should I stop creating so much goals? Why should I focus on my soul too? I am fine and I need to achieve something to feel important! No, I can’t go home! I need to be important to the world!”
South Node in 11th House:“ Why do I need to focus on my life and the good things about her, when there is so much things happening in the world? No, I can’t turn the TV off, I need to know what’s happening in the world! No, I can’t go to the party because there are better things to do than enjoy that little party, the world is bigger than that!”
South Node in 12th House: Why do I need to focus more on reality when I created just the right world for me? Why do I need to serve others? They serve themselves! Do you need help? Oh, you have my soul here for you, take it, I don’t need it! Why should I work for that if nothing ever works for me?“
<b><p></b> <b>Child of the future:</b> was 2016 really that bad wise one?<p/><b>Me:</b> Oh yes...countless of great people died...media was dying too and a lot of bad...but in the ashes 2017 emerged! All the old great things returned and prospered to rejuvenate the inner child...<p/><b>Child of the future:</b> what kind of old things?<p/><b>Me:</b> The Gorillaz, Samurai Jack, Invader Zim, Rick and Morty...just to name a few dear child that brought joy<p/><b>Child of the future:</b> didn't the Powerpuff girls also got a rebo-<p/><b>Me:</b> WE DO NOT SPEAK OF THIS.<p/></p><p/></p>
You know what’s the greatest thing about Thirteen Reasons Why?
It’s that everyone, every single character, is totally, completely human. They’re all 100% realistic and three dimensional. They’ve all got both virtues and vices, strenghts and weaknesses. They’re all also deeply flawed and damaged.
Obviously they’re not all the same… In fact, everyone has their own very distinct personality (and they always, always act on character).
But what I think the show is trying to say is that nothing is either black or white.
It’s one big fucking gray area and we’re all in it. The people who made small mistakes that ended up in tragic outcomes and the people who knew that what they were doing was wrong and did it anyway.
Because yes, Hannah was an amazing, funny, clever, beautiful girl who did not deserve anything she got. But yes, she also did have a flair for the dramatic.
And yes, Bryce Walker is a rapist and I hope he gets the sentence he deserves and more. But - and here you might not agree with me - Justin also told us he was always generous with him and his other friends.
This obviously is not to say that Hannah being a bit of a drama queen excuses the people who hurt her. And also is obviously not to say that Bryce being there for his mates excuses him for commiting one of the worst crimes possibile.
This is just to say that whoever wrote this show, whoever wrote this characters, knows exactly what they’re doing. Way too often TV and cinema (but also books, comics, video games ect…) tell stories in which people are either entirely good or entirely bad. And, I know, they do it because we like to read and watch stories in which we can identify with the good main characters. And it’s okay.
But it’s also not realistic. Those people are not realistic. In real life people fuck things up. Hopefully not as bad as they did in Thirteen Reasons Why, but still, it happens. People make mistakes and people kill themselves. It’s tragic, but it’s real.
To sum up, what I’m trying to say here is: it’s okay to watch shows in which the characters always choose what is right instead of what is easy. It’s okay to identify with those characters and it’s okay to “use” those shows as an escape from reality.
But sometimes you have to watch shows like Thirteen Reasons Why. Not because they tell you what is going to happen, but because they tell you what COULD happen. Anyone could be the next Hannah and anyone could be the reason why they decide to kill themselves. Shows like this remind us that actions have consequences. So, next time, think before you act and try to fix what you can still fix, before is too late.
Because, before Hannah proved them wrong, everyone on the tapes thought they were the good character.
… Except for Jeff. Jeff was 100% pure.
Also, sorry, I wasn’t planning to turn this into a morality lesson. It just happened.
I hope my letters have been reaching you and Dad. I know written stuff has never been super reliable, but… I guess it’s all we’ve got these days. Anyways, in case you haven’t been getting them, I want to say… I’m sorry for leaving the way I did. I know you told me it was a reckless idea, and after everything I’ve been through, I can definitely say you were right.
“It’s been hard, hard on all of us, and I’m not just talking about the monsters we’ve fought out here. Every step we made took us further and further away from the things we knew, and every morning, we woke up wondering if just over the next hill would be something good… or something terrible. It’s scary, not knowing what’s going to happen next. And the things we do know now - just how bad it can get - almost makes it all worse.
“You told me once that bad things just happen. You were angry when you said it, and I didn’t want to listen. But you were right; bad things do happen. They happen all the time… every day. Which is why I’m out here. To do whatever I can, wherever I can, and hopefully, do some good.
“We’ve all lost something. I’ve seen what loss can do to people. But if we gave up every time we lost, then we’d never be able to move forward. We’d never have a chance to see whatever beautiful things the future might have waiting for us. We’d never have the strength to change, whether it’s ourselves, or the world around us. And we’d never be there for other people, who one day, might be lost without us. This is what we were training for, Yang - to become Huntresses. To be the ones stand up, and do something about all the bad in the world… because there are plenty of people out there who are still lost, and even more who will try to gain everything they can from their sorrow.
“Believe me when I say I know it can feel impossible. Like every single day is a struggle against some unstoppable monster we can never hope to beat. But we have to try… if not for us, then for the people we’ve already… for the people we haven’t lost yet.
“I miss you so much. I miss Weiss and Blake, too. But I think you’d all be proud to know I made it to Mistral. All of us did. And we even ran into Uncle Qrow along the way. He’s going to take us to see Professor Lionheart, the headmaster of Haven Academy. And he told us some things you’re going to want to hear - things I can’t trust will make it to you in this letter. But maybe if you joined us, he could tell you himself. With Beacon gone, they’ll need Dad at Signal more than ever. I know you need to focus on yourself before I can expect you to come out with me, but it sure would be great to get Team RWBY back together again.
it makes me sad to see people dismissing jumin’s affection in the valentine’s day dlc just because he buys so many gifts.
not everyone expresses their love solely through words or cuddles. sometimes people enjoy picking out items that they think others might like, and enjoy giving gifts as it’s their way of showing how much they care. gifts are not inherently bad, and not inherently a sign that your love is fake or inadequate.
some people don’t like receiving gifts, and that’s okay! it’s also okay to give gifts if it’s a way to express your love and make others happy!
disliking jumin’s valentine’s day ending is not the problem. disliking it because you think gifts automatically diminish his feelings is kinda missing the point.
I think this fandom’s biggest problem is that it always sees things in black and white.
I’m going to be a pain but:
Criticism isn’t hate and hate isn’t criticism.
You can like characters while being critical of them or their actions.
Even “good” characters have flaws and acknowledging that means you see them for the interesting and complex characters that they are.
Character development means a character will change and learn from what happens to them. During that time, they will do good or bad things. It happens in almost all stories.
Characters who are “good” can do “bad” things and that doesn’t mean you have to dislike them or think one bad action means they’re bad forever. It’s always a lot more complicated than that.
Character who are “bad” can still be interesting and fascinating characters.
You don’t have to justify liking a character who do “bad” things. You only have to recognize and acknowledge they do bad things.
Just because a lot of people think something is true doesn’t mean it is.
There is always a context that explains how and why we perceive fictional characters. Our values are always influenced by the society we live in (with its prejudices and stereotypes).
What happens in the story is one thing. What happens in fandom is another. If your favorite character hates another character, you don’t have to automatically do the same. If the story makes two characters fight each other, you don’t have to recreate that fight in fandom.
I’m wondering if I should say anything about this (especially after a long, draining shift at work where two things went wrong – but those two things were enough to occupy me the whole entire night), but –
I just think it’s unfair that there have been callout posts for artists who have drawn Pharmercy in an offensive way, but have admitted their mistakes and have apologized for them.
It’s one thing to call them out if they didn’t. But the thing is, they owned up to their mistakes, and one of them is even reluctant to draw Pharmercy now because of it.
I just think Tumblr is too obsessed with being right and having this moral rectitude that’s personified in callout culture, to the point where even people who make simple mistakes are punished for them via death by crucifixion.
If you really want to help someone out, you’d engage with them one on one instead of getting thousands of people to shame them, and then smearing an entire subset of a fandom with the same brush, especially since there are members of that fandom who admit that there is a problem with racism, fetishism, whitewashing, etc. and have actively spoken out against it.
And in my case, I’ve even taken hits for it from members of my own fandom, and have lost people that I once considered friends because of it.
So yeah, Pharmercy fandom does have a problem with racism and bad portrayals of Fareeha, etc. And that should rightfully be discussed. Most of us are aware of this, and are trying our best to counteract it. But I do think it’s unfair to make callout posts for misguided artists who have made mistakes, and who have also apologized for them.