we are pregnant

youtube

New Sims vid! Making Eliza PREGNANT 

We return to pancakes’ house and have slightly too much fun!

I love knowing that out there are many people who ship supercorp and adore Katie Mcgrath, but also ship sanvers and respect Floriana Lima
Naruto couples attend a birthing class
  • Chouji: Providing snacks for his wife's unstopable cravings.
  • Karui: Crying in the corner because she thinks she's getting fat, while assaulting a bag of chips.
  • Naruto: Has three clones assisting Hinata to change positions while he holds her hand the whole time.
  • Hinata: Strongly embarrassed at having to spread legs in front of the entire class.
  • Sasuke: Pretends to find it annoying but has sharingan activated the whole time to remember everything.
  • Sakura: Glaring at Ino and doing her best at following instructions.
  • Sai: Follows all the instructions, including those for women.
  • Ino: Glaring at Sakura and doing her best at following instructions.
  • Shikamaru: Sleeps and snores.
  • Temari: Tries to pay attention, but later falls asleep, too.

fucked up 1d things 

  • when we found out louis was pregnant and nobody confirmed it and there was a show the next day and every time louis spoke it was dead silent 
  • when zayn literally left the band and they just posted a fb status like oh btw lol
  • when zayn literally left the band and none of them mentioned it for like 6 months afterwards
  • when they cancelled a show minutes before doors with hardly any explanation other than like ‘liam has the shits’
  • when they were like we’re breaking up but not really breaking up but we’re kind of breaking up but also not really
  • when zayn just didnt show up in orlando and we were like where is he??? and they were just like.. idk!
  • when otra started and there was like 1 song from four on the setlist
  • when they finally caved and added stockholm syndrome and none of them knew the words apart from harry (who wrote it)
  • when they dropped drag me down out of nowhere and literally rolled around in their millions laughing at the stress they put us through
If Touka is pregnant :
  • Touka : Ken, I have something I need to tell you. It's kind of urgent.
  • Ken : yes sure, what is it?
  • Touka : I'm pregnant.
  • Ken :
  • Touka : with a baby.
  • Ken : ...
  • Touka : you're the father.
  • Ken : ...
  • Touka : are you okay?
  • Ken : your brother's gonna murder me, isn't he?
  • Touka : Probably.
  • Ayato *barges into the room, kagune out* : Not probably. I AM going to kill you!

Yes, I’m in a same-sex relationship. But please don’t call me a lesbian.

When my partner was newly pregnant, we began interviewing midwives and took what has become for us a normal precaution: Before meeting with the one we liked best, we sent her an email introducing ourselves and our relationship. Still, one of the first things she said to us when we sat down was, “Just so you know, I’m very comfortable with lesbians.”

The thing is: we’re not lesbians.

That’s what we’d emailed her about. I’m a bisexual woman and my partner is a genderqueer butch. I opened my mouth to gently redirect her — something else we’ve gotten used to — but she was already two stanzas into a soliloquy about how she used to go on an all-women camping retreat with all her lesbian friends back in the 90s. I gritted my teeth: She was trying so hard to prove that she was Cool With The Gays that she spoke over us and it’s frustrating to tell someone who I am and have them correct me.

In a way, I get it: I am very visibly queer. You can’t miss it. I’m queer in that “I went to Massachusetts to get married when it wasn’t legal in Colorado” kind of way. My queer relationship and my queer family and my queer haircut are front and center, all the time. The number of pairs of Doc Martens I own is only exceeded by the number of Indigo Girls concerts I have been to. I’m, like, so gay, dude.

But that doesn’t make me a lesbian. And when I’m called one — and especially when I’m called one after identifying myself as bi — I’m reminded that how other people perceive me matters more than how I identify myself. By now, it’s difficult to imagine having my relationship and my identity simultaneously treated as valid. Read more (Opinion)

Wanna take over my wife's job after her maternity leave? get yourself pushed out of the company instead.

LTL, FTP. I have almost no direct involvement in this tale. I’m writing it on behalf of my wife.

Sorry for the wall of text… TL;DR at the bottom. This story happened (ended) two weeks ago.

Background:

We live in a country that needs a lot of improvement on laws, their application and enforcement…. we are a lot better than a few years back, but still sometimes people can get away with forging some types of documents, like medical records, education degrees etc. Also, english is not our main language, so job titles, degrees and other details are translated to their best equivalence.

According to our country’s labor laws:

  • All female employees are entitled to 3 months paid maternity leave.
  • Employers, at their own expense, are expected to cover for the employees on maternity leave, usually with temp workers.
  • Severance payments are mandatory when firing employees (without justified cause… crime, fraud, etc) with more than 3 months on their jobs, so that’s the time limit to be considered a temp employee.
  • Severance payment calculation is rather complicated, but for firing people employed 4 years or less, it usually boils down to about 4 months of salary.
  • To fire Pregnant women, employers have to pay them 6 months of salary on top of the severance payment they’re entitled to.
  • If an employee quits voluntarily, they effectively forfeit all benefits previously mentioned.

Keep reading

I saw a drawing by @hvit-ravn (I love their art so much and the way they draw human anatomy is astounding to me. Plus, their art of Kíliel is what inspired me to draw them more often. *throws self into the garbage*) and immediately, I had the idea to do Kíliel. And what’s better than family feels? Almost nothing. So here, have (a very pregnant) Tauriel (again) and Kíli with their babes, Eliel and Gilion. I always imagined Eliel being the spit and image of Tauriel, and Gilion the same way with Kíli. The personalities, though… that’s a different story ;)

I just want to say thank you to those who have said such nice comments about my art! I love all y’all. I’ve been getting messages and it’s just making my life a little brighter. I don’t normally do this, but if anyone has any requests, send them to me! I could always use the ideas!

Also, I might be writing a fic about Kíliel, including them having a little family. But I’m on the fence about it. Thoughts?

Everybody needs to go watch Andi Mack on Disney Channel because it focuses on a mixed Asian family. The main character, Andi discovered that her older sister is actually her mother, so we guess she got pregnant when she was young. This series shows how Andi handle this new situation. Also, her friends are sweet. There are a funny and carry boy named Cyrus who will question his sexuality and a joyful and sassy black girl Buffy who will deal with discrimation in school with her natural hair. I think now Disney tries to create more realistic tv shows with good storylines such as Lizzie McGuire or That’s So Raven. If you like Freeform/ABC Family, you should watch it because it kinda have some Switched At Birth vibes :)

anonymous asked:

Imagine person A of your OTP discovering they're pregnant by accident and not being afraid to reveal it to person B because they deeply love and trust person B not to spite them or leave them for being pregnant. (Because I see too many OTP prompts where the OTP is distrustful and scared of revealing such)

(Thanks for the prompt!)

AMERICAN GODS SENTENCE STARTERS

episode four - git gone

  • ❝ d’ya mind ?
  • ❝ best drinks have self defining names. you order a manhattan, god knows what you’re gonna get, but you order a gin and tonic, a jack and coke, it’s not just a name. it’s a command. ❞
  • ❝ how long you’ve been working here for
  • ❝ ooh, that’s bad luck. ❞
  • ❝ don’t do it. ❞
  • ❝ i was waiting for you. ❞
  • ❝ why’d you help me ?
  • ❝ you’re really not very good at this; i saw you coming a mile off. ❞
  • ❝ are you trying to recruit me ?
  • ❝ you could be a world class thief. ❞
  • ❝ you look like you could get anything you want just by asking for it. ❞
  • ❝ what d’ya say, huh
  • ❝ hang on a minute. i’m sorry. ❞
  • ❝ i owe you one. i feel beholden. ❞
  • ❝ let me buy you a drink. ❞
  • ❝ let’s go somewhere. ❞
  • ❝ so you are a thief. ❞
  • ❝ the weak spot, see ––– all you need is one. and it’s usually people’s attention. ❞
  • ❝ show me. ❞
  • ❝ oh, god. ten years, and [ … ] has NEVER looked at me like that. ❞
  • ❝ there’s a lesson in there somewhere. ❞
  • ❝ my grandma always had cats. she said that they could see ghosts when we can’t, and warn you of thieves. ❞
  • ❝ do you ever worry about what will happen if you keep stealing
  • ❝ do you believe in the afterlife
  • ❝ all i know is there’s more than i know. ❞
  • ❝ yeah, i think that might sound wiser than it is. ❞
  • ❝ when you die, you rot. it’s a fixed system. physics doesn’t take sundays off. ❞
  • ❝ my parents believed in everything. father, son, holy ghost, spirit filled and full of the light of god. they taught me all of it, chapter and verse. ❞
  • ❝ i went to bed every night in a world full of magic where anything was possible. ❞
  • ❝ it’s like everything that made the world anything more than what it is is just –– stories. like snake oil. but worse, because snakes are real. ❞
  • ❝ i wanted to get that magic back so bad, but one day i just accepted the fact that i couldn’t, because life is just not that interesting. ❞
  • ❝ don’t look at me like that. ❞
  • ❝ the fun is just getting started. ❞
  • ❝ i could teach you to fight. ❞
  • ❝ hey, you want coffee ?
  • ❝ are we pregnant ?
  • ❝ what i’m about to say may sound irrational to you, but i have all sorts of rational reasons for saying it, and doing it. ❞
  • ❝ say it, and we’ll talk about whether or not you should do it. ❞
  • ❝ are we … discussing this, or are you telling ?
  • ❝ there’s some wiggle room. ❞
  • ❝ are you unhappy ? because i’m happy, okay, you make me happy. ❞
  • ❝ yes, i see that you’re happy. from this side of it. the wrong side of it. and i think maybe i resent not being happy. not resent you, just … resent. ❞
  • ❝ do you still love me
  • ❝ we are like a history book. we’re established fact. we don’t change. ❞
  • ❝ i represent FAILURE to you
  • ❝ i can take it. if you’re on the other side. i can make it if you can. can you wait for me
  • ❝ just glad that i could be here to help you, you know
  • ❝ hey, don’t stay here alone tonight. ❞
  • ❝ why did you say that ?
  • ❝ come on, [ , say what you mean. ❞
  • ❝ last night was a one time thing. you were there. and thank you, but we’re not doing this. we did this. and now it’s done. ❞
  • ❝ you don’t love him. not the way he loves you. ❞
  • ❝ is that all this was ? just fun
  • ❝ are you saying no
  • ❝ i lived my life, good and bad. definitely not light as a feather. ❞
  • ❝ in life, you believed in nothing, so you will go to nothing. you will be done. ❞
  • ❝ there is nowhere else for you to be. ❞
  • ❝ tears have fallen for you. ❞
  • ❝ do i get a say in this ?
  • ❝ death is not a debate. ❞
  • ❝ how many do you think have come before you, all with promises and threads and offers of gold, glory, love ? who are you to misguide me from my duty
  • ❝ you are but a man, not even one i should remember. ❞
  • ❝ i’m gonna come in now. i’m gonna come in now, okay
  • ❝ is this a haunting ? are you haunting me ?
  • ❝ does [ … ] know
  • ❝ i’m a vulgar woman. anger and grief have just really made me vulgar. ❞
  • ❝ god, you know, i should thank you. it’s so much easier grieving someone when you’re glad they’re dead. ❞
  • ❝ oh, fuck your feelings. ❞
  • ❝ everybody has feelings, everybody cares about what they feel. i don’t care about what you feel. i care about what you think. what do you think about what you did ?
  • ❝ what was your big lie, [ … ] ?
  • ❝ i love [ … ] … loved [ … ]. love [ … ]. i love [ … ]. (s)he’s the light of my life. ❞
  • ❝ you, i remember. ❞
  • ❝ there is nothing i can do to lighten your heavy heart. ❞
  • ❝ your heavy heart sank you like a stone, right back where you last left off. ❞
  • ❝ was it love ?
  • ❝ love will always have you at a disadvantage. ❞
  • ❝ many is the man who would take any version of his lost love rather than leave his love lost. ❞
  • ❝ (s)he/they will say thank you to whichever god has sent you back to him/her/them. ❞
Wordplay, HO! (Heheh, "ho".)

(So, we found a 6-months pregnant widower alone in the woods, and decided to escort her back to the city. She takes an obsessive liking to our draconic paladin, who has been on the receiving end of an absurd amount of flirting from a number of ladies, none of which he has handled with grace. He’s forced to carry her, and then we get a job to rescue a character from prison.)

Woman in blue dress: “Get my prince back, and I will rock your fucking world.”

DM: And she kisses you then and there. The pregnant lady on your shoulder starts angrily pulling on your hair.

Paladin: “I didn’t want any of this! I just want my horde!”

Pregnant Lady: “Did you just call me a whore?!”

Paladin: “Wh- NO! NOOO! HORDE! THERE’S A ’D’ AT THE END!”

Fighter: “Your whore has a ’D’? What?”

*laughter*

DM: Oh, that’s canon!

“So… Correct me if I’m wrong here, but you did mention that a human and an angel aren’t supposed to…” Dean doesn’t finish his sentence, instead he glances over his shoulder and suggestively wiggles his eyebrows to refer to their earlier activities, gesturing with his finger between himself and Castiel.

Castiel, who’d been reverently tracing the knobs of Dean’s spine, his fingers gliding along freckled skin, rolls his eyes.

“What?” Dean asks as he shifts onto his other side, now facing Castiel and smiling up at him with the toothy grin that might have been part of the reason why Castiel had fallen in love with this infuriating human somewhere along the way. “We just broke the law, Cas! We told Heaven to go screw itself!”

Castiel settles for tracing the freckles on Dean’s chest and collarbones instead; There’s no need for him to even look at Dean’s face in order to see his expression, seeing as the smugness in his voice gives it all away, revealing that he’s not sorry at all.

“In case you need an update on how the male body works, I’m fairly certain that what we did won’t get you pregnant.” Castiel teases, pausing to press a light kiss to Dean’s shoulder. “It may be frowned upon by my brothers and sisters, but we’re not endangering entire worlds. Separating us is far from their priority.”

“Huh… Guess it’s a good thing that I’m not a woman, then.” Dean huffs jokingly, his arms finding their way around Castiel’s waist, pulling him against his chest.

Castiel goes willingly, burying his head in the crook of Dean’s neck. He considers Dean’s words, but smiles to himself as he confidently answers “Even then, or no matter what other circumstances would’ve been different… We would’ve found a way, Dean.”

It’s silent for a moment, and Castiel thinks he feels Dean’s lips, brushing the top of his head.

“Yeah…” Dean mutters eventually, sounding nothing but earnest all of a sudden. “Yeah, we would have.”

At that, Castiel says nothing, merely hums in contentment. It’s good to know that Dean believes in them as much as Castiel does.