we always forget him

Ok but I’ve been binge watching the Narnia movies again, after not having seen them for a long ass time, and now, being a little older and (hopefully) a little more mature than I was when I first saw them, I always feel physically sick when I see the Pevensies being children after The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe because they just aren’t anymore and I can’t even begin to imagine what it must be like, to grow up as kings and queens, respected and important, and full of duty, only to go back to being 8 years old (in Lucy’s case).

They didn’t remember England, or the wardrobe, or their old lives, they were Narnians and they were pushed back, not only into a world that was bound to make them miserable, but also into bodies that couldn’t reflect what they’d been through.

Just imagine Peter, waking up in the morning, not remembering that he isn’t the Magnificent anymore, imagine him subconsciously reaching for something to trim his beard, only to remember that it isn’t there anymore, to expect old battle wounds to hurt until he realises that they can’t because he doesn’t have them.

Or Edmund, who left England a stubborn selfish little boy who only wanted his mummy back, and came back the Just, the redeemed traitor, the diplomat, the man, having to resort to being ten years old and probably not even allowed to peek at a newspaper because he’s just a child after all. He plays chess, incredibly well, he doesn’t mock his siblings anymore and all the friends he knew when he was still a boy are either irritated at his behaviour or too childish, too selfish for somebody who knows very well just what selfishness can do, who has a part of the White Witch in him, always.

Susan forgets, we all know that. She must’ve lain awake at night, remembering just what it felt like to cover pain and viciousness and gore with a smile and a blush, remembering being the Gentle, but never in war. She must’ve cried for all the lost years, for all that she learnt and that she can never forget, for all that she has accomplished, that will bring her nothing in this world that doesn’t feel like hers. So she sits down in front of a mirror, talks herself out of believing, telling herself that it wasn’t real, that it was just a dream, that this Narnia her siblings talk about is nothing but a game.
The truth is too terrifying, to devastating to face.

Lucy, little Lucy, who grew up under Mr Tumnus’ smiles and Aslan’s approving gaze, who was loved by all, who did learn how to rule, how to negotiate but who never forgot just what it means to be a queen of Narnia, this girl who matured into a woman, who had a woman’s mind and body and a queen’s grace, she who they called the Valiant, the lion’s daughter, she shrank into herself, into a child, younger than even her siblings. She remembers, clearest of them all, she is the only one who still knows Mr Tumnus’ face, still knows Aslan, but she is just a girl, a pretty little thing who will never be the queen she was, who will never be the woman she was because queenship forms a person in ways no schools can.

They must’ve been devastated when they tumbled to the floor, short and small, and there’s a war they have no control over and Lucy is small, Edmund is skinny, so skinny and Peter and Susan have lost their glow and they’ve changed, they’ve changed so much. (The first time, somebody calls them by just their names, they feel invalidated and small. And offended. They’re kings and queens, they’ve earned their titles and now they have to sit in a dim room filled with children and listen to teachers, have to allow themselves to be insignificant and nothing more than what they were when Lucy first stepped into Narnia - frightened children in the middle of a war they wish was never there in the first place)

Things I love about MJ

•Him
•His eyes
•His eyes when he smiles
•His actual smile
•His laugh
•The way his whole face lights up when he’s laughing (and the stars shine in his eyes)
•Him being able to make everyone in the room laugh
•The cheesy agyeo
•The love that he has for his members
•The love he has for us Aroha
•His impressions
•Vocals, Vocals, Vocals (he sings like and angel ok)
•His dorkyness (dorkiness?)
•His acting in TBC
•When he dances
•Jaw that was sculpted my magic
•Lips !!!!!!!!!
•Cute nose
•He some how has the perfect eyebrows
•Can’t forget the adorable ears
•Short but tall in spirit
•I just love him a lot

#HappyMJDay !
(Pls feel free to add)

If you thought Yuzuru Hanyu was Extra, I’ll let you know Tatsuki Machida just choreographed a 9 minute long program in which he changes costume, mixes contemporary style with ballet and wears a lot of eyeliner. 

Tatsuki Machida has always been the original Extra except we tend to forget due to him being retired. 

3

My kind of aesthetic, Taekook’s body differences. Dem shoulders, peck and arms doe jeon jungkook.

thank you everyone

All your kind words during our tough times were so helpful and touching. We are so grateful to have such a kind community, thank you so much again. Love you all. Luffy will always be in our hearts and we will never forget him. Regarding his remains, we decided long ago what we would do when we would lose our loved family, and we’re happy to say he is now back home with us on a little memorial spot we set for him. As for Ghibli, seeing him alone broke our hearts… so we decided that he needed a companion. So, why not two?

4

how baekhyun reacted when the translator mistranslated his ment

imagine the other pilots knowing abt poe’s crush and acting like middle schoolers and telling finn things that go completely over his head like “so finn… we think you really turn poe on” and of course finn has never heard this expression before so he’s just like “… what?!” and knows he’s missing something aND POE JOLTS IN HORROR FROM BEHIND THEM WHERE HE WAS TRYING TO GET THEM TO SHUT UP AND RESCUES FINN AND PULLS HIM AWAY and finn is just so confused like “no wait what were they talking about?” aND ALL POE CAN MANAGE IS A NERVOUS SMILE AS HE TRIES TO ASSURE HIM ITS NOTHING AND THEN TURNS TO GLARE AT HIS SQUADRON WHO ARE BACK THERE DYING

We will never forget you Jack

Jack was saying in his last video that maybe we will forget about him when he stops Youtube. Jack will always stay in my heart no matter what and I will always remember him .I know I’m not the only one.So I thought we should all state the reasons why we will never forget him and what exactly we will remember of him. We should show Jack that his impact in our lives is permanent even if he thinks otherwise. I hope you liked my idea.

Option 3 of “How to get your boyfriend to drink your blood!”

So sorry, I’ve been writing a fic and studying for my entrance exams so I haven’t been subbing the game lately. Hope you can forgive me with this short Mikayuu video (or you can read my fic on Ao3 so you can understand my pain >.<)

Previous part ¦ Alternative version ¦ “Correct” option

SNK Readthrough: Volume 15 Part 18

Hange hasn’t seen Levi since she had to abruptly leave their hideout to deliver an important message to Erwin. There last bit of together time was torturing Sannes. With her mission in Trost complete, it’s time to get the team back together.

While not exactly a James Bond moment, this panel provided us with a delightful dose of intrigue. We discover that long before the Survey Corps was under attack, Levi and Hange chose “Moppel’s Barn” as rendezvous location complete with code words and nicknames. 

I have strong need of the backstory of this, canon or otherwise *looks imploringly at fanfiction writers*. Why was Moppel’s barn chosen? Did it have significance for them. Like special significance? *mind wanders into shippy headcanon*

15 Times We Wished Donna and Harvey Could Be Together on Suits.

POSTED ON 8/1/16 on Suits Usa Network.


Suitors have so much to love about Suits, but one thing that has gotten fans excited over the years is the relationship of Darvey.

Watching Donna (Sarah Rafferty) and Harvey (Gabriel Macht), it’s easy to wish they would finally get together. This is by no means an exhaustive list, but check out some of the best moments that left us shipping Darvey so hard.

1. When Harvey showed up for closing night at Donna’s play. She didn’t think he would even care about it, and he not only showed up, but he also brought flowers and told her that she was the only thing he had going on that night. We swooned.

2. After Harvey got a case against Donna thrown out on trumped-up charges, he went over to her apartment to celebrate with some wine. The two reminisced about the past (oh, how we wish we could’ve seen Harvey spit that shrimp across the room!) – which was exactly what Donna needed. And at the end of the night, when he told her, “You know I love you, Donna,” our hearts absolutely melted.

3. Actually, whenever these two visit the other’s apartment, we know it’s going to be a tender and emotional moment that will have Darvey shippers begging for a happily-ever-after future once and for all.

4. When Harvey finally admitted to Donna “You and Stephen – it bothers me.”

5. All of the times that Harvey has said, hinted, or otherwise shown that Donna is irreplaceable and that he’d be lost without her.

6. Whenever Donna has to adjust Harvey’s tie, smooth his suit, or fix his hair.

7. Donna can get super-sassy with Harvey and we always love that. But we will never forget the time she told him, “If you were ever lucky enough to have me, you wouldn’t want to share.”

8. Two words: can opener.

9. When Harvey realized just how integral Donna is to his success and told her, “I don’t want to find out what type of lawyer I’d be without you.” Knowing that the best closer in New York can’t imagine his success without Donna makes us love them even more.

10. When Donna told Harvey that she slapped Hardman, and he proudly asked how it felt. That was a special bonding moment!

11. Whenever Donna is sitting at Harvey’s desk because she loves that power position.

12. The time Harvey went to visit Donna at home to convince her to return to work for him and he told her, “I can’t be me without you.” Try and tell us there was a more perfect moment than that!

13. When Harvey stood up to Donna’s dad by threatening to shut down Jim’s business if Donna somehow got involved in a shady deal – but it didn’t stop Harvey from helping Jim years later.

14. Every single time he watches her leave his office.

15. When Donna says she has faith in Harvey’s ability to help Mike. Seriously, what’s sexier than having someone believe in you?

Drabble - Late Night Tweets

This is really silly and my attempt at comedy, but the idea of a drunk Val tweeting did something for me, so here we have a situation:

Late Night Tweets

I just keep staring at my twitter feed as the tweets role in.

Iโ€™m ova here in NY thinkin bout this chick like โ€œwhy you all the way ova there thoโ€

shoulda cut ya wings

jk jk

go fly girl

you on da next level

I just want you to come back tho

you left your scar on me

gorgeous

โ€œCโ€™mon, Maks, you canโ€™t ignore me forever.โ€ I tried them all, Maks, Alex, Teddy, even Serge despite him being on the West coast, but itโ€™s like they have this big conspiracy where they do not react to any of my calls.

Keep reading

The Lucky One II

Table of Contents 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

Chapter 17. Formal Closure

Drifting…

Drifting…

The first three days after the miscarriage were the hardest because every morning, immediately after you woke up, your hand habitually fell over your stomach only to touch air.  This emptiness – absence of substance was so asphyxiating as if someone had punctured a hole right in the center of your chest. 

But you forced yourself to stop crying for the sanity of your husband, who looked as if he had lost a quarter of his body weight over the coarse of a few days.  So even though you had no appetite – no desire to fill the emptiness in your abdomen because it was reserved for your little angel, you still slurped the entire dish up for every meal.

It was for the benefit of your family, you thought, because your two boys and your mother rotated shifts so that at any given point you weren’t alone.  But the more they doted you, the more it hurt. 

“Jagiya,” Sehun called, catching you staring out the window, lost in your trance again. 

It was raining outside.  The pretty streams of rain looked like crystals evaporating…

Even something so pretty has to disappear…

There is beauty in the unattainable…   

“Hmm?” you hummed, turning around you look at him. 

He took your hand into his and squeezed it.  Those orbs of love and forgiveness sunk into yours like materia, but you refused to accept them.  Shaking your head, you feigned a smile. 

“You can cry,” he soothed, “Don’t hold it in”.

And almost – you almost let the tears fall but one look at his protruding knuckles made you hold your smile and once again shake your head.

“I’m fine,” you lied. 

The handsome male sighed and pulled you into his chest.  You knew that he knew you were masking your shattered heart because Sehun always knew everything about you.  But you didn’t want to confirm his suspicions…because only then would you be able to lie to yourself. 

“We can have another one in the future…don’t worry,” he coaxed. 

Another one…For the first time in the past week, you let out a shaky exhale, betraying the hard work you did building up your façade.  Because that was what you were scared of…already thinking of “another one”.

One day, as time passes we will forget YoungHwa even existed – just lost and forgotten but in order to move on we have to selfishly forget.  When someone important leaves you just like that…in the beginning we will think of them every waking moment…then every other moment…every few hours…days…weeks…months…years…until no more.  Until the mere mention of their name becomes a taboo.        

Because even though you had the privilege to be with him the first five months of his life…there wasn’t any concrete evidence that he existed.  And that was why you hid in the bathroom every night and sobbed, thinking that Sehun was asleep when he was actually standing outside the door hearing your every cry, every wail. 

You hadn’t slept for five days and in addition due to all the mourning, your eyes were swollen to the size of golf balls.  Cringing at your reflection in the mirror, you took a towel, dabbed it over hot water, and started patting your eyelid until you thought your eye sockets were going to melt. 

As soon as you slipped out of the bathroom, your husband stood waiting for you with a treasure box in his hands.  You immediately recognize it as the chest Sehun built for YoungHwa’s baby clothes, accessories, and toys.  Your lips unwillingly trembled.  You wanted with every centimeter of your existence to lung yourself forward and caress the only memory of Sweetpea you still had but you held it in.  Instead, you smiled sadly while lifting your finger to follow the intricate swirls of the wooden box. 

Your husband opened it.  Inside were all his clothes neatly folded up, a few rattles that formed a heart, a mini toy car that Youngwoo bought at a gumball machine one day after school, specifically for his younger brother, and an envelope with the words, “To our Beloved Sweetpea, Oh YoungHwa.  From Omma, Appa, and Hyung”. 

You felt your eyes water and instantly looked away but Sehun held your face to prevent you from doing so. 

“Cry, Babe.  Please,” he begged.

But it wasn’t until you caught the sight of an unfamiliar wooden box within the chest, that you forfeited to Sehun’s pleas.  It was a mini casket and without a doubt, you knew that your baby was inside. 

“…Oppa…” you finally wept. 

He let out a sigh of relief.  Momentarily, Sehun placed the chest onto the floor to welcome you into his embrace.  You fell right in his chest, at last, letting your external physique match your internal battle. 

“Our Sweetpea…” you shut your eyes tightly and hid your face into Sehun’s sweater. 

“He will always be with us.  We won’t ever forget him,” Sehun said firmly. 

Lost but not forgotten.  Is there comfort in knowing that somewhere in this world, maybe not even in this world anymore…someone was waiting for you just as much as you were waiting for them?

With you still in his arms, he picked up the envelope and opened it to reveal a blank sheet of letter paper. 

“Let’s write a note to our Little Angel,” your husband suggested and you tearfully nodded. 

Taking your hand into his, the two of you sat down in front of your vanity desk. 

Dear our Little Sweetpea, YoungHwa,

Omma and Appa regretfully were not able to safely bring you into this wonderful world but we want you to know that your existence has greatly impacted our lives.  We both love you will every ounce of our being and would have loved for the chance to have gotten to known you better…to have gotten to watch you grow up…take your first steps…babble and blow bubbles…say “Appa” and “Omma”…

A tear fell onto the rice paper, causing the ink to bleed.  You gasped, frantically trying to wipe off the flaw before it ruined the whole paper. 

“Oppa.  We have to redo it,” you instantly concluded. 

“No, no we don’t, Honey.  Because this way, Sweetpea can feel our sincerity…” he reasoned, so you slowly sat back down. 

Sweetpea, we really miss you but we know that you are at a better place now.  One day, Omma and Appa would love to meet you again.  Until then, please take these gifts Omma, Appa, and Youngwoo-hyung prepared for you. 

We love you so, so much our Little Angel, Oh YoungHwa. 

Love,

Omma & Appa. 

 

You held the letter against your chest while staring up into the sky.  There were so, so many things you wanted to say that ten sheets of paper wouldn’t cover it…but even then, words could not express the unfathomable emotions lingering in the depths of your heart. 

“Jagiya…let’s go…” Sehun motioned you to follow him as he lifted the treasure chest. 

The two of you stopped in front of your backyard.  You waited patiently as Sehun retrieved a crate from the garage filled with shovels, gloves, and other gardening utility.  He held out a shovel and a pair of gloves and started to dig into the soil.  Quietly, you watched as his broad shoulders rolled up and down with every stab he took.  Sweat trickled down his forehead while soil started to dirty up his pants, but he continued.  With each grunt, each hiss, tears gathered at the corner of his eyes – as did yours.  Despite the gloves he had on, the pure force exerted had caused friction to puncture the thin fabric.  Blood dripped from the cuts on his fingers. 

“Oppa…” you called out, running over to him. 

He was crying and so were you.  At your presence, he turned around.  His grip around the shovel still as tight as ever.  So you wrapped both of your hands over the handle as well and together the two of you poured your blood and sweat into carving the perfect burial for your son. 

For all the tears that you swallowed back down your throat this past week, you wept ten times louder until the veins along your temples threatened to pop and your eyes threatened to never envision light again.  Your husband followed suit.  You let the dirt clog up your fingernails and smear along your skin.  Sehun threw off his gloves, knelt down, and began to dig with his hands.  His blood mixed into the earth floor. 

“Sehun-ah…” you whispered, wrapping your arms around his shaking body. 

You could feel every breath, every twitch, and every beat of his heart. 

I’m so, so sorry for not being able to protect our baby…

When the pit was big enough, the two of you lifted the treasure chest and lowered it into the core of the earth.  You kneeled down and gave one last kiss on the lid before Sehun started scooting the soil over it.

Goodbye for now, our Sweetpea. 

In the matter of minutes, the hole was filled up as if it was never dug out in the first place…as if YoungHwa never existed.  A burial was essentially just a way of hiding your deepest pains so that you’re not reminded of the agony and torment 24/7.  That idea made your heart pulsate…until from the crate, Sehun took out a slab.  Engraved on the surface were the words, “Our Beloved Oh YoungHwa”.  Your fingers grazed the cold stone surface, tracing along the golden letters. 

“________ah,” Sehun called for your attention. 

Turning around, you hugged the exhausted, forlorn father and as soon as you do, both of your legs gave out from fatigue.  You fell onto the floor, taking your lover with you.  Your hair sprawled out like a fan against the soil.  Both of you lie there motionless…feeling your skin against the rough patches of Mother Nature.

So raw…

So bare…

“I can feel him…” you whispered, touching the ground. 

“I can too…” Sehun answered, “Because he’ll always be with us, in our hearts”. 

Nodding, you allowed one final stream of tear to roll down, vanishing as soon as it mixed into the nature beneath you. 

Beside you, Sehun closed his eyes, silently taking in the reality of the situation.  You gazed at your lover, gracious for his consideration that had help you gain a sense of closure…even though you knew today wouldn’t be the end of the mourning you were content knowing that Sehun and you have come to terms with not being complete beings. 

Before leaving to clean yourselves up, Sehun took out a pouch of seeds and sprinkled it over YoungHwa’s grave. 

“That way, there is a beginning in every ending…” he explained and you nodded in agreement before throwing your arms around his neck. 

—-

 

Two weeks later as you sat in the waiting room of the hospital for a routine check up, your father appeared in front of you.  Immediately, your eyes grew glossy.   

“________ah…” he spoke. 

With gritted teeth, you grabbed the closest thing to you, which happened to be a magazine on the table, and hurled it at his direction. 

“Please.  Appa just wants to make sure you are okay…” he begged. 

Okay…?

You screamed, “YOU KILLED MY CHILD, YOU MONSTER!”

“I know!  I am so sorry, ________ah,” his face twisted up into a ball, “Tell me what I can do to make up for my mistake!” 

“Make up for your mistake?  Did I just hear that correctly?  You killed my child.  You will never be able to make it up because he is gone!” you sobbed. 

You didn’t understand what this man wanted from you.  How did he even have the guts to show up…

He placed his hand on your shoulder but you pushed him away.  Again, he brought his hand forward and you were so close to flinging him away just like before but in his hand was a mini toy truck with the name “Oh YoungHwa” spray painted on it. 

“For my grandson…”

You burst into tears.

“Are you mental!? You psychopath!  He is NOT your grandson,” you corrected. 

When he continued to pester you, you frantically looked around, begging for Sehun to return to save you from this misery.  You moved from one chair to the next as if playing musical chairs but he kept following you.  Your heart was pacing; your hair stood up from its roots. 

“_______ah, what do I have to do for your forgiveness?” he asked. 

“GO DIE!” you harshly answered, clawing at your hair.

Other patients stared at you and maneuvered to a far end in the waiting room as if identifying you as some psychopath serial killer.  Your eyes mirrored his…those vampire bloodsuckers that haunted you in your sleep…now you were one and the same. 

Finally, Sehun reappeared at the doorway.  As soon as he noticed the presence of the man in the leather jacket, the container of food in his hands were tossed onto the floor.  It splattered all over.  The oils separated from the sauce like two unequal parts in a whole.  He sprinted at top speed toward you.  In a swift move, your lover pushed you to stand behind him as he glared into those merciless eyes.

“I don’t know who you are but I am going to give you one warning and only one.  Leave my family alone.  If you so much as to show up ten feet in front of my wife or son, I will make sure you will regret it,” your husband threatened. 

The color on the older man’s face diminished.  Silently, your father nodded once and walked out the door.  His feet trailed along the floor, dragging the crimson liquid with him until a trail formed in his absence.  Your body continued to tremble into Sehun’s back until gradually your vision blurred and you crashed onto the floor.  

 

a/n:  Oh My God, what have I done?

The No Control Project is not a Larries Project

The original proposal for the No Control Project came from Anna buscandoelparaiso and I am going to link that post here. The idea was and is an excellent one and at no time did it mention that it was to support Louis and Louis only nor did it imply that he was the only writer on the song.

When Layne started helping with the initiative, she never mentioned that this initiative was to support Louis and Louis only either.  Neither of them implied in any way that this initiative was a Larries one. It isn’t.

You have to understand that despite the fact that this was set forth to give recognition to the entire band in light of the fact that their own management has done a piss poor job of promoting this album on their behalf, that many of Anna’s mutuals and followers (along with Layne’s) are Louis girls as well as Larries.  As such, many Louis girls (myself included) attribute this song to Louis because he carries a very predominant part of the vocals for the song.  You also should understand that it is a big deal to us because he started out getting the least amount of solos and was generally not confident about his vocal abilities.  This has unfortunately been brought into light by the NB comments on Twitter recently.

All of those things combined lends itself to posts such as my own which talk specifically about Louis in reference to this initiative.  I feel the need to explain and defend bc this short text post of mine (which was me talking out loud on my blog as per usual…if you follow me…this is what I do… talk out loud) because it got comments on it suggesting that I forgot Liam wrote on the track as well and now I have seen angry anons on my dash asking other bloggers why Liam is being left out. 

Please don’t do that.  This is an incredibly positive project, not set forth to leave any of them out, but rather to bring recognition to their music from FOUR which has not received enough positive attention.  Everyone’s intentions were and are in the right place.  Please don’t make this a fight against favorites or ships or anything else.  This is a time to come together and support them.  Text posts such as my own are just in good fun.  That’s literally it.

I could sit here and tell you how much I adore Liam.  I do.  You can go back through my blog since it was created and I guarantee you that you will not find a single disparaging comment about him. That is not the point though.  

This is a chance to participate in a very positive movement to garner attention to their music.  Please don’t make this a fight as it takes away from what a good thing this is.  Please.