wayne-thomas

anonymous asked:

Any head cannons about the batboys reacting to Mar'i going on a date (I have a personal head cannon that Jason is her godfather)

- Dick would give her the whole “birds and the bees” talk because he can’t stop her from doing what she wants but he wants to make sure she’s safe and the entire time she’s like “Dad stop, now, please just… stop talking…”. He’s the stereotypical Embarrassing Dad

- Jason is the one who would be casually sharpening a knife or cleaning his guns while her date is sitting in the living room waiting and he would be lowkey threatening her date while asking tons of questions to make sure that this kid isn’t trouble 

-Tim does background checks on the down low to reinforce Jason’s interrogations so that there’s a very minuscule chance that Mar’i is dating a villain or a terrible human being that isn’t worthy of her or whatever

-Damian will trail the two of them once they leave the house so her date doesn’t try anything fishy (if Mar’i finds out, she gets incredibly pissed and everyone has to apologize repeatedly because it’s invasive and she consistently tells them that she’s more than capable of protecting herself)

-Duke is the only one that is genuinely chill about her dating anyone because he doesn’t doubt that she could break someone in half if they tried anything (plus she can do whatever she wants, so it isn’t up to him to tell her what to do or meddle)

Every Robin has fallen asleep next to Batman on a stakeout.

When Duke did it, he woke up half an hour later with his head pillowed on Bruce’s shoulder. At first he thought he was going to get in a lot of trouble because Bruce is always so stern. But Bruce just gave that same dismissive grunt as ever and filled him in on the last half hour’s lack of activity.

Headcanon that the batkids hide under Bruce’s cape ALL the time. When they get cold on patrol, when they’re scared of a particularly creepy villain, when they get tired and need a warm, dark place to hide, they can always be found in Bruce’s cape, hanging onto his back like a koala. One time Hal and Barry were at the watchtower just hanging out when they saw something move under Batman’s cape. Assuming it was an alien parasite out to kill the dark knight by sucking his brains out, Barry pulled off the cape to reveal not one, not two, but three of Bruce’s kids huddled under there playing a game of Uno. It was a mystifying experience.  

Bat-Kids React to BatCat Engagement
  • Dick: Super-excited, just wants his dad to be happy. Throws himself into wedding preparation. Lives for this. Takes cake-tasting far more seriously than either the bride or groom.
  • Jason: Passive-aggressive questioning in the fake voice of a 10-year-old, just to annoy Bruce. Is not actually worried about whether he'll have to share his room with the cats. Selina finds it hilarious. Bruce is unamused.
  • Tim: "...You know, I knew something ridiculous was going to happen while I was not-dead. This wasn't even in the top twenty worst-case scenarios, so...congrats?"
  • Cass: Quietly super-happy. Subtly works cat motifs into her costume. Tags along with Selina on patrol.
  • Steph: "About time. This house needs some more feminine energy. They're always ganging up on me."
  • "Stephanie, you don't even live here."
  • "New mommy, dad's being mean to me again."
  • Damian: Is mainly worried about Alfred the cat and how he'll react to his new step-cats.
  • Duke: Polite, welcoming, genuinely congratulatory. Also practical. Makes sure all the valuable Wayne Manor paintings are secured to the wall. Especially any with a cat in them.
  • Harper: Takes over bachelorette party planning. Has binders of blackmail material on Bruce to show Selina. This is her moment.
  • Barbara: Is just glad the tabloids will stop shipping her and Batman.

Alfred “sass to deal with this” Pennyworth

Bruce “yes these are all my children” Wayne

Dick “I am like the mom of the friends” Grayson

Jason “I died once and will remind you often” Todd

Tim “I am too tired for this” Drake

Barbara “badass and smart” Gordon

Stephanie “don’t tell me what to do” Brown

Cassandra “you don’t stand a chance” Cain

Harper “I dare you to” Row

Kate “don’t doubt me cause I will kick your butt” Kane

Duke “I can do this” Thomas

Damian “I prefer animals over people” Wayne

Batfamily misunderstandings
  • Jason reading magazine: Bruce Wayne secretly gay? In the above picture he can be seen leaving a bar with one Clark Kent with his arm around the other man
  • Bruce: I do not like dick why do people keep saying that
  • Bat family: *gasps in surprise and runs over to hug a sad dick Grayson*
  • Stephanie: how can you say that everyone loves dick
  • Alfred: shame on you master Wayne
  • Tim and Duke: shame shame shame
  • Damian: even I love dick father
  • Bruce: bangs his head on coffee table* why is my family like this
Don't think about

- Dick’s heart beating hard right as a trapez act starts, fear that they might fall.
- Damian thinking Dick was dead when he got to come back to life.
- No one telling Dick *cough Bruce* that Damian was alive again.
- Tim seeing his dad bleeding out and dead.
- Barbara having people judge her by her wheelchair not her brain.
- Kate’s last time she sees her mom and twin sister is when they are dead.
- Jason constantly excepting people to let him down.
- Duke having his parents go insane due to the Joker gas. Not knowing all the good their son was doing.
- Stephanie at 15 and deciding what the best option was for her baby and deciding it wasn’t with her.
- Damian seeing sons and mothers out together knowing he will never get that.
- Jason being sold out by his mother resulting in his death.
- People Tim care about dying and him feeling alone as Robin was taken from him.
- Alfred having to bury his love ones. Living to an old age when many of them died young.
- Harper losing her mother and trying her best for Cullen.
- Cass looking at them knowing she is the reason Miranda Row is gone.
- Bruce watching his whole world being laid six feet under at a young age.
- Luke feeling like his dad cares more for work.

I dare you to try to not think about it.